The original story and character of this twilight Fan Fiction belong to Stephanie Myer, No copy right infringement intended, Though the plot belongs to me sole.

Though this is a fictional story some of the events mentions are true events and the author has permission from those involved to use these and all future events. If you have any questions or concerns please contact me directly

TRIGGER WARNING: mention of death and abuse

13th September 2016

Dearest Emma,

Today is my 34th birthday, but it does not feel special at all without you here. Your father is trying his best to make it special. He even got me a gift from you, which I will always cherish, but it's not the same, it still breaks my heart silently that you are not here with us, though I try to hide my pain from your father, but he always sees it. I know it breaks his heart. But it makes it worse for him when he sees how much I suffer with you not being here.

So now your uncle has married his Rosalie. I also want to talk about your godfather Uncle Jasper and how he met his beloved, Alice.

Though I had never given up hope that one day your father and I would have a child of our own, with the help of my therapist I came to accept that we were not going to have children. Your father and I decided to take a break from doing anything except for joining together in our love for each other Though, this killed me to stop obsessing I could see the effects it was having on your father, the man I loved more than life itself.

Remember I told you that Jasper was your father's best friend, well, Jasper is quiet and reserved but always on the go, wanting to try new things. Jasper is an easy person to like or even love but like your father, he is a little shy around women, although he never found it hard to find a girlfriend. The trouble was that women would take advantage of him. Treating him like crap and trying to walk all over him because he was a gentleman. He would treat any woman he was with like she was a queen and the only woman in his world.

After many failed attempts to find his love when he found her he didn't see her coming and did she come like a hurricane. In walked Mary Alice Brandon into his life and ours, with her telling me the first time I met this little spitfire that we were going to be the best of friends.

Many people around us found Alice strange and difficult to handle, especially your dad's and Jasper's female friends. There is one who comes to mind Tanya Denali. Even though she was happily married with children of her own. She did not like Alice and did not want Jasper with her and hated the fact Jasper asked Alice to marry him.

Though I was close to this woman I felt she was being unfair to Alice. Yes, she was different but I could always see how good she was for Jasper. Alice always brought the best out in everyone, even though Alice tried her hardest to be friends with this woman, she was spiteful, and would tell anyone that would listen to her that Alice was not good enough for Jasper, including me. I eventually stopped talking with her even, at Jasper and Alice's wedding she did not approve. I knew deep down, that even though she was married she always wanted Jasper for herself and felt that he should have married her instead.

I never had a problem with Alice and was not surprised the day Jasper told us he was marrying Alice. I was excited for them and looking forward to having Alice in my life. I got to watch this bubbly hurricane pledge her life and her love to Jasper, the perfect man to tame her overzealousness.

Alice and I quickly became best friends and I learned very quickly that her hurricane personality was a cover for her deep-seated past. She would never talk about it, because it was too painful for her even to think, it would cause her mountains of deep seated depression, I could understand and relate to that, the need to protect one's self from pain.

Alice loved to shop, she was also a fashion designer in her own right, but she was also highly intelligent woman always considering ways to stimulate her mind. I think by now she has three college degrees under her belt, fashion, business and marketing. All things that have assisted in making her, such a young age in the fashion industry, a much a sought icon, though many tried, she would never expand her boutiques beyond Seattle, meaning women from all over the country would travel to one of her stores to get an Alice Brandon original. Alice was always a hit during fashion week. I once went to one with her to help and my god I thought she was a hurricane in her personal life, but Professionally during Fashion week she was in her element and never stopped and everyone loved her.

Boy did she love playing dress up Bella, I hated it but did it because she loved it, and gee, could that woman shop. If it was not for clothes that she didn't need, then it was for the home or gifts. I always hated my birthday and the attention it brings, thanks to Alice, but each year she would insist that I have a party. This year I won, no party but I think that had more to do with your father putting his foot down and expressing that due to the turn of events, this year that it needed to be a quiet affair. Even though that would not stop me from thinking about you not being here, Emma, with us to enjoy my first birthday with you, but that will never come.

At around the same time as Jasper and Alice marrying, your uncle Emmett and Aunt Rosalie announced they were expecting their first child. I was so excited to be an aunt, that I went out and brought your aunt a gift bag full of pampering goodies. I know your aunt prefers grease to bath bombs or working on her cars over facials, but it was the thought that counted. Rosalie and I were not very close, as I found it hard to let go of Emmett and made things difficult for your aunt for a long time, believing your uncle should side with his family on certain matters, and not his wife. I WAS SO WRONG. I was jealous, I can admit that now. I had never had siblings of my own and your uncle was the best big little brother a woman could have and I did not handle it well losing him. Your uncle was doing the right thing supporting his wife, she was his future.

Well, when we were told they were expecting, I told your father it was time to disclose the family secrets to his brother he had be kept hidden. It just so happened that night was your father's night off from the Jazz club and we drove to the other side of the city where Rose and Emmett were living courage he needed to talk about all the secrets he'd been keeping inside himself. I then went and told them about my mother and my past just briefly, this was about Emmett and Edward's family. Rose was not shocked at all, Emmett had trouble believing it because he never saw it happening and it never happened to him. Though he told your father, he believed him, I think he was just in shock.

I had the courage to explain to Emmett in more details about what I knew of the secret and how he would not have seen anything unless he was being groomed for the part. Rose of course, believed every word of it and has seen it time and time again since she started working in child protection. She could understand my need for them to know the secret, as future generations needed to be protected. I could see the steam rolling off Rose because, she was so angry, and had a need in her to not only protect her unborn child and husband, she also had the need to protect Edward, even though she knew that was my job. I knew she would always be on my side, to lend a hand, should I ever need it.

I knew that with the help Rose, Emmett would eventually understand why Edward kept this family secret. She would be the one to help him open his eyes to the truth, even if he chose to still be involved with his family, he would be aware aware and able to protect future generations of the Cullen clan.

This was also the day I put my issues aside and realized I did not really have a a problem with Rose, my issues with her were all on me, my insecurities getting the best of me. I was not losing the love of my brother -in- law, I was gaining a sister. It took Rose and me a long time to get to a stage where we are friends, not best friends, but we stand together as strong women in this family of secrets. We are the strength for our husband's when they need us to be especially, against their family. Nothing stands in our way. I think I have it easier than Rose, Edward understands where I am coming from and will support and decision I make, but still does not like to ruffle the family feathers. Emmett on the other hand, though he believes his brother and knows the truth, tries not to let it affect the family dynamics. He tries to make everyone happy, but he if can't someone, will be hurt.

Though nothing really changed in the family's dynamics both boys were aware of the family secret, you could see the changes in how the boys reacted to being around their parents and family. While Rose and I were like lionesses protecting their den and cubs, the boys and future children would always be protected and safe while we were around. We now stand together against whatever this family will throw at us.

As time went on and the more I got to know Rose, I grew a deeper respect for her and her strength. she would challenge both her husband and his family no matter the cost. She would not allow Emmett's family to harm those that she loved or needed her protections and that included Edward, to some degree.

The night that Edward told his brother the family secret I am sure Rose saw a different side to Edward; the vulnerable child that had been affected by this secret, but also a man who had to face his fears and humiliation to come forward to protect his future niece at whatever cost it was to him. Though Rose and I have never talked about it I'm sure she has great respect for her brother- in- law. But she would have also seen the love that Edward has for his family. Even with this secret hanging over his head and the love that he has for his brother by keeping it to prevent from hurting Emmett. But with my support Edward came to realize that he needed to also protect the innocent children that were to come into this family. For this I am sure Rose feels a stronger bond to Edward and a deeper respect for him.

Dear Emma,

On this note, I will leave you for now, I am sure you question my need to talk about the Cullen family secret, but you also need to understand this family's dynamics and why your Aunt Rose and I are the way we are, some of this was painful to write for both your father and myself but you need to know the good, bad and ugly about us your parents.

I know I only touched on your godparents Alice and Jasper but you will be reading more about them in the future and how important they became to your father and I and still are.

Love your Mum

Bella Cullen

A/N

Thank you so much to all my readers for their time they put into reading my story. This is my first fictional works, though I am currently also working on my first original fictional story.

I would like to say a massive Thank you to Sherry and Carole for your time and effort in helping me make this story great, you both are there for me when I need to talk ideas.

A special Thank you to two important women in my life for now you will be known as Rosalie and Alice, you know who you are. Through your courage and strength you have helped make me a better person I am today. Even in the darkest times you both have been there for me