Chapter 8: The Rational Voice

Harry and Hermione had been following the track until sunset. Not only did they find nothing, but also their physical exhaustion was starting to show. They hadn't eaten and drunk since breakfast and their feet became heavier and heavier with every step they took.

Another problem was that they didn't find any sign or indication when the forest would end and allow them to return to civilisation. Every time a bend was visible, they were sure that after this particular one, they would finally see a path that would lead them out of the forest. It never happened though and the track seemed endless to them.

They even discussed the possibility that it was enchanted to change its direction. Hermione had then used the spell she taught Harry for the Triwizard Tournament which made her wand point north. Apparently they were walking approximately west so they quickly discarded the possibility.

After another promising looking bend, they came to the conclusion to call it a day and find shelter somewhere. They couldn't continue their search in the dark, as it would have been too easy to set up a trap for them. After some rather extensive searching, they found a small spot between two larger rocks that was covered by several branches of nearby trees, making it a decent place to spend the night.

Hermione tried to clean and perform several cushioning charms on the ground. Calling it comfortable would be a straight lie, but it was far better than sleeping on the cold forest leaves. In the meantime Harry was securing the place with several protective enchantments that Hermione had taught him last year.

"You can go to sleep, I will do the first watch", Hermione told Harry, when both were finished with their work. She was already starting to climb on top of one of the rocks to get a better view over the surroundings, when Harry grabbed her by the shoulder and held her back.

"I think there is no need for that", Harry replied, his eyes looking everywhere but at Hermione.

"How do you mean? We have to do it Harry, they could be around here. The protective enchantments will not stop everything"

"I always keep the invisibility cloak with me, so I have it here"

"You are telling me this NOW? We could have hidden under it for the last hours"

"Relax, Hermione. It's not big enough to completely cover two people while walking. But it might be enough when we are lying"

Hermione's cheeks suddenly shifted their colour from pale white to a slight reddish tone. Harry was fidgeting awkwardly from foot to foot.

"You mean, we would need to sleep really close to each other?", asked Hermione.

"Yes I know, it's not ideal. But we have to rest and will most likely find something or someone tomorrow and we can't face them when we only slept for a few hours", said Harry.

"It's not a big deal. We might have played stupid teenager games a few days ago but I think we can handle the situations as adults. We have to. For Ron and Emilia", said Hermione.

It was the first time since this morning that a smile formed on Harry's lips and he was glad to find a more relaxed expression on her face too.

Both knew that they wore thick masks at this moment, only putting them on to support each other, to manage a grin in an apparently desperate situation they found themselves in.

The dreadful day slowly came to an end. They hadn't had time to search for food, not even sure how and where to get it, so they decided to ignore their stomachs and got ready for the provisional bed. Harry even managed to moderately brush his teeth with a cleaning charm he directed at his mouth, while Hermione was creating one of her famous flames between small stones she had picked up from the ground.

"The enchantments should keep the light inside", said Hermione when she noticed the strange look that Harry gave her. "I am not stupid"

"I didn't meant to say that", replied Harry.

"Okay. I will try to transform some leaves into blankets, maybe we can even make it a bit cosy here"

"I highly doubt that, but I appreciate your commitment", said Harry and smiled at her.

The air was filled with unease. Every time they tried to lighten the situation with humour, they were reminded of the events of the morning and immediately felt bad about it. How could they make jokes when Ron and Emilia were in danger. They knew they did everything they could and that they would continue their search the next morning. Still it felt as if it was not enough.

Hermione did swear when she was transforming the leaves. In the first try, she only managed to get a thin layer of fabric that resembled more a summer dress than an actual blanket.

"When did this transfiguration become so difficult?", she asked herself.

Under normal circumstances it would have been an easy task for Hermione Granger but this evening it took her five attempts until she was content with the result, namely two thick wool blankets that were chequered in Gryffindor colours.

She went to the spot where she casted the cushioning charms and spread out one blanket on the ground. They would cover themselves with the other one and place the invisibility cloak on top with a sticking charm. This way the cloak would always stay on top of them.

Hermione finally sat down, exhausted from the day and crawled under the blanket. She heard Harry approach, but didn't say anything. She had been silently processing the day and wasn't in a talkative mood.

The blanked was slightly lifted and in the next moment he lay next to her. It was impossible for them not to touch each other. The invisibility cloak would have fitted perfectly in their third or fourth year, but now they couldn't lie down on their backs without their shoulders pressing keen against each other.

Hermione had accepted the rather uncomfortable sleeping position and was even slightly happy about the warmth that spread from the point of contact through her body. It felt nice to have Harry close. Just as when she was about to close her eyes, she noticed his body shaking slightly.

She first ignored Harry's body movement, not sure whether she had imagined it, but she could clearly feel a tension in the air. It was one of these moments when she realised that something was wrong with her best friend, when he needed her help.

As their shoulders were already touching, she didn't need to move her arm a lot to find his left hand. Surprised, Harry flinched at the contact, but after a brief moment he entwined his hand with hers.

The gesture had the desired effect and his shaking faded.

They were embraced by the pure silence of the night that was only disturbed by the whisper of the leaves and the sound of their breathing. The dim golden light, that was emitted from the conjured flame, was vainly fighting the surrounding darkness. Hermione couldn't relax in this atmosphere and she knew that Harry must feel that same.

She shifted her sleeping position to the side awkwardly, not having much space under the invisibility cloak and still holding hands with him. She was facing him now and slowly opened her eyes.

She couldn't see much in the dark, but the flame spent just enough light to see his features. Hermione remembered how he looked after Voldemort's return and now his appearance was similar. Pure sadness was written all over his face mixed with guilt, anger and desperation. His green eyes that were shining only a few hours ago were now matt and teary.

When did he open them?

"Hey…", Harry whispered and tilted his head to the side to face Hermione.

"Hi", replied Hermione.

"Did I just catch you looking at me?", asked Harry, his lips forming a smile.

"Ehm, probably yes. I was admiring your beauty, you know."

"Oh, really?"

"Yes", Hermione said, with a grin on her face.

"I can spot your sarcasm my dear. I must look like crap and you…" - he was slowly scanning Hermione's appearance - "don't look any better to be honest… OUTSCH! What was that for?"

Hermione had released his hand, and had hit him playfully on the shoulder.

"You can't say that to a woman, we always look beautiful and not like crap"

Harry was silent for a moment and seemed to be a little bit embarrassed.

Hermione suddenly started to giggle and Harry looked at her with questioning eyes. After several seconds of confusion, he couldn't help and joined in.

Their laughter pierced the darkness and for a moment Hermione was sure that she saw the intensity of her flame increase.

As suddenly as they began laughing, it stopped, the reality hitting them with full force. Harry's shaking started again.

"They are being tortured right now, Hermione. Or they are already dead", Harry whispered.

"Don't say that, we don't know what happened"

She gently put a finger to his lips, silencing him before he could respond.

"I know it's not easy, and I struggle with it every minute, but we must keep our heads clear. We will find out tomorrow, and it won't help to worry all night", she said.

Harry nodded approvingly, but didn't look fully convinced.

"You have always been the missing rational voice in my head, Hermione"

"Have I? Well someone has to do it, or you would have run along the track like a suicidal maniac"

"Come on, now you are exaggerating a bit, don't you think?", Harry replied with a grin on his face.

"No, not really"

Now he was the one, who hit Hermione playfully on the shoulder.

"OUTSCH! Really Harry, you should learn how to treat a lady"

Harry let out a brief laugh and said "Sometimes I have to restrain my rational voice"

"Something a maniac would certainly approve", she replied.

They shared another laugh for several seconds. Hermione couldn't resist to stare at him, his happiness causing a warm feeling in her stomach. If the Boy Who Lived was laughing, the boy who has so much burden on his shoulders, more than anyone else in this world, then how can someone not be happy with him?

Suddenly Hermione's arm was touched by a sweaty patch of skin, and before she could even react, Harry took her hand again into his.

"It helps me, I hope you don't mind", Harry whispered.

"Not at all. Because I am your rational voice, I must not feel emotions", she replied.

"Oh really? So you don't feel anything at the moment?", Harry asked with a mischievous grin.

"No, just a sweaty hand that is touching mine", she replied.

"What about this then?"

He started to rub her palm tenderly with his thumb in a circular motion.

Hermione couldn't deny to herself that his action had an effect on her. It took her a lot of willpower to resist doing the same to his hand but she managed to ignore the temptation.

"Now you are smearing the dirt on your thumb all over my hand. Thank you very much!", she teased him.

His thump stopped the motion and he moved his arm instead. He led their entwined hands to her body. Starting at her thigh and ending at her waist, he stroked her side with the back of his hand.

It sent a noticeable shiver through Hermione, that encouraged Harry to repeat his teasing several times.

"What about now?", he asked her in a whisper.

"Nothing. You apparently only touched some nerves, which triggered a physiological response of my body. You will not win this game, Potter", she replied in a slightly trembling voice.

Her pulse was definitely faster than five minutes before and something deep down in her stomach wished that he would continue with this stupid game they were playing.

"Okay, I reckon you are indeed a soulless and indifferent person"

Damn

"Now you get it", Hermione whispered in such a low voice that she wasn't sure whether Harry had even heard her.

To her surprise, he kept their hands on her waist. The heat of his body easily penetrated the thin layer of fabric of her top. She felt comfortable, more than comfortable actually, and she had the impression that this moment they just shared, stretched the boundary between friendship and more, to its limit.

Hermione shook her head vigorously at the thoughts that entered her head. Your best friend has his hand on your waist to comfort you, nothing more. Don't be pathetic.

"What are you thinking about?", Harry asked her suddenly, waking her from the reverie.

"It's nothing", Hermione replied and she hoped that the darkness covered her blushed cheeks.

"Sorry", he said and moved his arm back to its original position, as if he had read her mind.

They were silent again.

After a while the void that had left his hand on her skin was unbearable.

"What is wrong with me?", Hermione asked herself. Why did she enjoy this so much?

"It's a bit of cuddling, nothing more, you are just exhausted from the day and enjoy a bit of company"

With this conclusion she was about to call it a day and close her eyes but her brain had other ideas.

"Did he just flirt with me? What a preposterous thought! Who wants to flirt with me anyway? Bushy hair, book worm and below average genetics. Stop thinking! You are supposed to sleep. But maybe there is small probability that… SHUT UP!"

Before she became aware what she was doing, she had already stretched out her arm and cuddled up close to Harry's body. She could feel his warm breath on her neck, as she rested her head on his shoulder. Her heart was pounding heavily in her chest and she was certain that Harry could feel her heartbeat.

"I knew it, you are not…", Harry started to whisper in his ear.

"Shut up!"

And then finally, between two exceptionally strong heartbeats, they found the courage to do what had been on their minds for the last minutes. As their lips met, a sensation awakened inside Hermione that had been buried for a long time.

The kiss slowly intensified and soon their tongues were battling against each other. She felt his hands on her back, moving gently over her smooth skin and sending shivers through her body.

Their lips parted for a moment, and they opened their eyes. They grinned widely at each other and before Hermione could utter a word, Harry had already leaned in and silenced her once again.

Author's Note: If you think it's unrealistic that they kiss in such a situation, I have to agree. Why did I write it anyway? Find out in the next chapter :)