Kara sat at her desk, stunned into silence.

Her captain was dead, killed when his plane went down somewhere over the Pacific. Possibly one of the few ways you *could* kill that man. She thought morbidly. In a plane crash, there was no enemy to fight against, and that meant Thomas Chandler was out of his element.

"Ma'am? What's wrong?"

Kara shook herself to look at the speaker.

"Mark."

"What's up?"

Kara forced herself to think, dammit. Rachel needed to know. Right now, before she heard it elsewhere.

"Can you go and get Dr. Scott and bring her here? I need to tell her something in confidence."

"Of course. Is everything okay?"

"Please just get her, Mark. Quickly."

. . . .

Rachel sat in the back of the SUV, nausea rising along with a sense of foreboding. Mark swore he didn't know what was going on, but from the look on his face, he seemed to think it wasn't good. Tom had confided some of his concerns about this trip when he talked her out of going herself. Peng was apparently a vicious man, coming up through the Chinese intelligence service. He was so intent on keeping her out of Peng's reach that she'd spent most of his trip with a vague sense of physical unease. She did her best to keep from thinking the worst as her stomach roiled with what little she'd been able to eat this morning.

They pulled up to the courthouse, and they were ushered inside with unseemly haste. One look at Kara's tear-streaked face was all she needed.

"Kara, no."

"I'm so sorry." She said, pulling her into an embrace. "The plane went down."

Rachel stood there, letting the world exist without her as she processed the information. Tom was gone. And she'd only just gotten him. He was supposed to be safe now, conning a desk as the CNO. But after all the missions, all the raids, he dies on a diplomatic trip. Had he been right about Peng? Suddenly, she broke the embrace as her previous nausea returned full-force, aiming for the nearest trashcan. Kara was with her in an instant, helping her through until there was nothing left, then moving to the couch. Both women looked up as Michener entered the room.

"Dr. Scott – Rachel – I'm so sorry. I – there are no words."

"Get out."

He looked stunned at that response. He looked between both women, then the smell registered.

"I said, GET OUT! You sent him on this stupid mission, he's dead because of you!"

"It was a diplomatic mission!" he protested. "How was I supposed to know?"

"You're sure it wasn't Peng?"

His forehead creased at that. This certainly wasn't a direction he'd expected this conversation to take.

"What?"

"Tom didn't want me to go, and he said Peng was the reason why. Are you sure it wasn't Peng?"

"We have the radio traffic from the plane. It sounded like a malfunction." He said, though she detected a lack of certainty in that statement.

"Sounded like? How do you know?"

He opened his mouth to reply, but couldn't come up with a good answer to that. All they had was that recording - the plane had gone down in the middle of the Pacific. She pinned him with a glare.

"…I'm going to go ask some more questions. Let me see if we have any ships in the area." Michener said, turning to leave.

"You do that." She told his receding form.

"Do you really think it could have been on purpose?" Kara asked quietly.

"Yes. I was invited, too, but Tom wouldn't hear of it. He'd talked to Peng, and he didn't like him."

"Well…I suppose it's a good thing he didn't. I'd hate to have lost you too. And the kids have already lost one mother."

"Oh, god, the kids. Do they know?"

"No. They're sitting on the news for now, which is part of the reason we brought you here instead of sending an officer."

"What am I going to tell them, Kara?"

Kara looked at Rachel and saw her own worst fear. But Kara took a deep breath and answered as best she could, even though she knew Rachel wouldn't accept it. As she wouldn't be able to in her place.

"That their father did his job. They're Navy brats. I hate to say it, but we all know it could happen."

"But it wasn't supposed to! He was safe now – he hated that stupid desk, but I loved it."

"I know." Kara said. "Come on, let's get you home."

"No – I can't. Not yet. I can't tell them yet. And I can't not tell them either."

Kara nodded. If Rachel needed some time to gather herself before breaking the news to the children, she'd give it to her.

"Alright. Why don't you go lay down on the couch?"

. . . . .

A gentle touch woke her.

Rachel blinked, sitting up. Where was she? She was on a couch…in the courthouse…why was she here? Then the memories came flooding back, and she felt bile rise in her throat. A trashcan was shoved in her face, and she took it, not that there was much left to expel. She put it down and took the proffered tissue from Kara.

"Thank you." Kara simply nodded, not knowing anything to say that would make things better. "What time is it?"

"About seven o'clock. I was going to suggest dinner, but clearly that can wait."

Rachel let out a bitter laugh.

"Yeah, I haven't been able to eat much since he left. Nerves, I guess."

"Nerves?"

"Stress goes straight to my digestive tract. I've been either un-hungry or actively nauseous since before he left for China." She noticed Kara's forehead crease briefly before her expression smoothed it away. "What's that look for?"

"What look, ma'am?"

"The look that says you had a thought."

Kara pursed her lips. She had had a thought, but now was not the best time for it. If her suspicions were correct, it might soothe the pain a little…but if they weren't, it would only make things that much worse.

"Out with it, Kara." The look on the doctor's face wouldn't let her off the hook.

"Ma'am…Rachel…I'm sorry, I know it's none of my business…but… could you be pregnant?"

Kara watched as Rachel blinked, processing that question. Then, slowly, she nodded, fresh tears tracking down her face.

"I think…maybe I am. It's been long enough…I just hadn't realized…"

"You've been busy."