Chapter 27: Something for Everyone.
"Alright, so now that this... contest, is over and done with, what's the next step?" Ivor pushes things along.
"Well, I'd say that there's not really a whole lot else we can do at this point aside from just... designing the puzzle." Jesse announces to the room, then looks back at Ivor "you sure you don't wanna join us?"
"So long as you're here, you may as well have fun." Petra recommends.
"I... believe I am quite sure." Ivor nods, a very slight hint of hesitance in his voice.
"What if we can think of something he likes?" Lukas asks Jesse, despite Ivor being right there.
"Ooh! is there anything you'd like, Ivor?" Jesse immediately asks, "if there is, we could work something out...!"
"Well..." Ivor narrows his eyes as he looks down at Dan "...I am not into... that."
"More for me." Lukas shrugs, because he is VERY into that.
"I also don't like... the kitten man." Ivor continues.
"Stampy Cat!?" Stampy's head perks up.
"Do you just have a problem with dicks?" Petra asks.
"..." Ivor glares at her "back in my day, dicks weren't even an option, you either fucked pussy or you were a faggot, and would be ridiculed or killed as such, now, I'm not in support of those days, and I feel no love for them, but truth be told, their effect is still strong on me: the thought of fucking dicks is automatically rejected by my mind as an act of suicide, and that's all I associate them with, I honestly don't know if I would be into them or not, because my subconscious is terrified of even assessing the possibility."
"Sooo, is that a... yes...?" Petra asks.
"It is neither a yes nor a no." Ivor shakes his head "but what I do know, is that even if I was a hardcore... homosexual, I would not be attracted to the meowing, high-pitched, soft-voiced kitten man, nor THIS." he points at Dan's messy ass "especially the latter."
"Well, that's just fine, Ivor, Lukas already fucked Dan and Stampy's mostly reserved for me, so if you want just Stacy then that should work out perfect." Jesse points out.
"Great." Stacy rolls her eyes "now I have to be molested by Grandpa..."
"N-no...!" Stampy cries "they can't do this to me! they can't have my girlfriend take BOTH their men's dicks...!"
"Hmmmmmm..." Ivor frowns as he looks at Stacy "...this one isn't very attractive either."
"But good enough?" Jesse really wants Ivor to join.
Stacy looks up in surprise.
"Not... really..." Ivor squirms "I'm not very into brunettes..."
"YOU'RE a brunette!" Dan points out.
"You're a man." Lukas points out "does that mean you're attracted to me after all?"
"...whatever." Dan shuts up.
"If her hair was a lighter shade, and her body more... womanly, then maybe I could go for it." Ivor huffs "and an accent wouldn't hurt-OH, and someone who hasn't been USED already, thanks."
"Grandpa wants a god damn virgin!?" Stacy snarks "wow, and I thought you were creepy before all this..."
"I don't need a virgin!" Ivor snaps "just somebody who hasn't already had their brains fucked out by LUKAS."
"Hmm..." Jesse thinks about it, then her eyes brighten up, "hey! we could get Lizzie!"
"NOOO!" Dan protests "leave her out of this!"
"She's fresh, she's got the bod, she's got the hair, fuck! she's even got a British accent! it's like a fucking miracle!" Jesse cheers, "would you go for that, Ivor? for all we know she might even be a straight up virgin if you are into that!"
"HMMMMMM...!" Ivor takes interest "w-well... I mean... if the stars are so perfectly aligned... then it seems almost... disrespectful, to not take the treat."
"So you'll do it!?" Petra asks gleefully "you'll fuck with us!?"
"This time... yes." Ivor accepts.
"OH MY GOD!" Jesse can't believe this is happening, "for real!?"
"Yes, yes, so long as we don't take forever." Ivor confirms hastily.
"Do you wanna go get her then?" Jesse (and her boobs) bounces in excitement, "you have clothes, so you'd be the fastest."
"Alright, I'll be right back with..." Ivor pauses.
They stare at him.
"...my piece of ass." Ivor finishes.
"YAAAY!" Petra cheers, happy at seeing Ivor loosen up.
Ivor proceeds towards the door.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Dan scrambles to his feet and runs inbetween Ivor and the door "YOU CAN'T! DON'T!"
"Out of my way, faggot!" Ivor growls, budging Dan aside with ease.
"Ugh...!" Dan grunts as he falls over, rolls over, and dies from Ivor's small shove "n-nooo...!"
"HEY, BITCH!" Stampy calls "my girl may have been fucked by Lukas, but your wannabe-girl is gettin' fucked by IVOR! at least Lukas is hot shit, Team Stampy wins again!"
Everybody stares at Stampy.
"...heh, sweet." Petra laughs.
Tap-tap. Stampy feels Stacy tap his shoulder.
"What is it?" Stampy asks, grinning.
"What happened to peace!?" Stacy demands, hushed but stern.
Stampy's eyes shoot wide with realization, "I..." he stammers "f-for... I forgot that was a thing..."
Silence.
"Well... I suppose it's a hard enough habit to break, so relapses are kind of to be expected..." Stacy guesses, "but even still, it's really loser to include mine and Lizzie's suffering as an element in yours and Dan's petty feud, so I'm not very impressed about that."
"I'M SORRY!" Stampy pulls his one win-all trick: beg for forgiveness "I want peace, I really do, I just forgot! I take it back, (but not publicly: that'll cause trouble), I make peace again! I do! I'll try harder not to forget again, and if I do, I want you to punch me in the nu-FACE, make it face! or, uh, actually, we need to keep my face in top quality, so, uh, punch my shoulder, yeah, o-or, uh, actually, just, calmly inform me if I fuck up again, okay? I'll try to fix it...!"
Stacy smiles and shakes her head at him being a cutesy mess.
"...wait a second!" Stampy starts up again "Dan always does it though! it didn't even start with me! this is all HIS fault! I was just trying to beat him at his stupid game, before I would always just leave you and anyone else completely out of it."
"...huh, true." Stacy realizes "okay, you're off the hook for that."
"Yay! Stampy Cat!" Stampy cheers.
"I'll be right back..." Ivor promises as he heads out the door.
Well, everyone, we're finally here. Ivor is obliviously walking straight into Lizzie's and Cassie's trap. Next week, the revolution begins.
Being ourselves, we have of course made a poll asking you how you think that entire situation will play out. Things are about to get tense and dangerous again; Lizzie is serious, Ivor is deadly, Cassie is a wild card, and there's a big room full of potential reinforcements for either side right beside them. We know we're excited for it, we hope you all are as well.
RISE, brothers and sisters, Jesse's reign will finally be challenged.