Deep Space Four, Stardate 2292.251
Sarek chimed on the door outside of Losha's quarters and waited. He was accustomed to dealing with all kinds of irrational species but he wasn't sure what to anticipate when it came to a Vulcan who was not in control of his emotions and who had sufficient reason to be distressed and angry. The human expression Don't shoot the messenger came to mind. The door opened and he was greeted by the teenage Seenan.
"Ambassador Sarek!" Naalem smiled widely. Sarek supposed the boy must be anticipating that he was here to deliver good news. It was a pity he could not.
"I was hoping I could speak with your uncle."
"Come in," he heard Losha's voice from inside the room.
"Losha," Sarek said, stepping into the room, "may I speak with you alone?" Losha, who was sitting on the lower bunk of the cabin's bed, didn't answer him directly; instead he directed the boy out of the room. For a moment after he left, there was silence.
"There's a chair here somewhere, if you want to sit down." Sarek pulled the lone chair out from a small desk opposite the bunk.
"I am glad to see that you have recovered enough to have been released to your quarters."
"Yeah." It was the tone of someone resigned to his fate. It would be an unpleasant conversation.
"Dr. Naik has informed you that I requested more information about the denial of your application to travel to Vulcan, I presume?"
"Yes."
"I must ask you, do you believe there was any reason for the application to be rejected?"
"I don't know."
"You have no suspicions?"
"Suspicions? Yes, I suppose I have suspicions but I can't be certain."
"I contacted the Vulcan Immigration Service on your behalf yesterday and received a response today."
"What did they say?" Losha gripped the side of the bunk, suddenly alert.
"You indicated on your application that you had no criminal convictions. The immigration service found otherwise."
"Yeah. I didn't think…" He trailed off as he released his grip from the bunk. "I didn't want to lie about them. I'm not a liar. Those were a long time ago. Most of the records are sealed because I was a minor. But I knew if I put them on the application, I would be denied anyway. I didn't feel like I had a choice." Sarek felt a strong pang of desperation. A Vulcan who was not in control of emotions could project powerful ones. He was not accustomed to this even from humans and other emotional species.
"It is illogical to presume that your application would have been rejected."
"No, it's not. Do you really believe that they'd approve someone with criminal convictions? I know how Vulcans are." Sarek was overcome with a feeling of extreme bitterness. He didn't seem to be entirely capable of blocking this man's emotions.
"Do you? Even I can't presume to know what the immigration service would have decided. You have a medical need to visit Vulcan, two doctors substantiated this, I gave my recommendation as well. However, my recommendation was given assuming you were forthright in the information you provided." At that instant, Sarek felt regret envelop Losha's bitterness.
"I'm sorry. I appreciate that you've tried to help me. I didn't mean to put you in this position. You have to understand, the only thing I was thinking about was getting this surgery so I can see again. I can't be blind for the rest of my life. I can't." Sarek was hit with a wave of hopelessness and sorrow. "I did stupid things when I was young." Losha continued. "I was stuck alone on a planet in the middle of a war. I became addicted to sur. I'm not ashamed of that; it happened to a lot of people on Senes during the war. When you become addicted to sur, you don't care about anything else. You will do anything for it. But I never hurt anyone, I'm not a threat to anyone! Those were victimless crimes!"
"You would consider robbery and assault victimless crimes?" At this question, a surge of Losha's anger came through.
"It's not what you think! Not that you'll believe me but I have nothing to lose so I'll tell you. The assault was when I tried to stop a man from attacking my friend. She can tell you! And I didn't rob anyone. That man... did you read in those files that I was convicted of prostitution? Yes, there wasn't anything I wouldn't do to get sur. I was not in my right mind, it completely controlled me. That man, he was a customer. And he wouldn't pay me. He got what he wanted and he then he wouldn't pay for it!" The anger he felt from Losha intensified into a rage but then he began to breathe deeply and Sarek felt the rage subside somewhat.
"I'm sorry. I know you don't like all these emotions. I'm not angry at you. There isn't anything I won't do to have that surgery. They can keep me under guard if they're really worried. Not that I could commit any crimes anyway. I won't even be able to find my way out of the room." His voice was shaking and though the eye dressings prevented him from seeing any tears, Sarek knew he was crying.
"It was not my wish to upset you," he said calmly.
"You haven't upset me. This situation I'm in is upsetting."
"Understandably. I have no wish to see a man condemned to blindness when it may be otherwise. I will do what I can. Understand, though, that there is only so much I can do."
"I understand. I'm grateful, and not just for me. I am responsible for a child. I need to be able to take care of him. He has no one except me and his aunt."
"I will be in touch." Sarek turned to leave. This man's emotions were more than he had been prepared for. He sensed Losha's desire to be alone - he was embarrassed - and he needed to refocus so he could get working on his plan. For now, it was best to keep it to himself. There was no sense in giving false hopes to someone in such a precarious emotional state.
Negotiations resumed the following day when Ambassador Bareess of Ursai arrived, leaving Sarek little time to work on his proposal. It was unlikely the Vulcan Immigration Service would reverse their decision. In that case, he would do his best to arrange for Vulcan specialists to treat Losha somewhere else. It wasn't simple - though he had no doubt he could find willing doctors with Dvir's assistance, there was the matter of the facilities and equipment. No doubt some of the necessary equipment would need to be transported from Vulcan. Dvir was willing to help with this as well but she did not have the connections he did. Losha would have to wait, at least until the negotiations had ended.
He was on his way to his quarters during a break in the negotiations when he passed Naalem in the corridor, Losha holding on to his shoulder from behind. He was nearly startled to see the man's face for the first time. The bandages had been removed, revealing eyes that were dull and unmoving. An involuntary shudder ran through him. It was slight, but a lapse in control nonetheless.
"Ambassador Sarek!" The boy stopped and looked at him wistfully. "I'm glad we ran into you. We wanted to see you before we leave for Senes tonight."
"You're returning this evening?" He look away from Losha and down at the boy.
"Yes," came the reply from Losha. "The cargo bin has been repaired and our customers are anxious for their cargo. The captain doesn't want to delay here any longer." Sarek turned to Losha involuntarily but he averted his gaze when he was met again with his unmoving eyes.
"I'm sure my wife will wish to say goodbye before you leave. Shall I direct her to your quarters?"
"Yes, we'd like to say goodbye to her."
"I have not forgotten what I have said to you. I will be in touch."
"Thank you." Sarek felt extreme anxiousness and fear, fear of leaving. Losha didn't want to leave the station, likely fearing that once he did, there was no hope of his condition changing. Sarek almost wanted to give him a inkling of hope but understood it was for the best that he say nothing until he was certain his plan would work.
"I wish you a safe journey." He forced himself to look at Losha's face, pushing aside the strange feeling that came over him when he looked at his eyes and the expression on his face.
"Thank you."
Six days after Losha's departure from Deep Space Four, Sarek sat down to review some of the points discussed in the last negotiation session. Progress had been drastically slowed by the arrival of Ambassador Bareess. He and Ambassador Tala found little they could agree on in relation to their relationship with the Federation. He was most likely in store for several more weeks of discussions with them.
He was about to open the file containing the notes from the last session when his attention was diverted to another file at the bottom right of the screen, one that had been sitting on his computer for over a week. It was the file the Vulcan Immigration Service had sent him concerning Losha's application. He had been intending to review it but the negotiations had taken precedence. He didn't really have the time to review it now but for some reason he found himself reaching out to touch the image and open the file.
There was quite a bit of information to go through, files and reports in reverse chronological order. He scrolled through employment history and education records before reaching the criminal files. There was no new information - it was just as the immigration service had stated. He was about to close the file, intending to review its contents more thoroughly later, when he came across a jail release record. He froze, unable to take his eyes away from the screen. It could be a coincidence, he thought, and quickly he began scrolling back further and further until he found something that confirmed it. His hand shook as he touched the file again to close it. There was still a small possibility that things weren't as they appeared. Small, but still a possibility. He would consult Dr. Naik. He would not allow himself to entertain any ideas until he did.