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Tony just nodded. If his father suspected that his initial dash was more to go to Gibbs' place than to go get food, he didn't say, and Tony at this moment was too exhausted to care. The immediacy of dinner, Tali, and his dad had all worked to make his earlier meeting with Gibbs fade in intensity, but it was still in his thoughts, even leaving him hopeful. With yet another promise to himself not to jump to conclusions and commit his trust again too soon, he relaxed into dinner with his daughter and his father. If he'd only imagined last Christmas just how different this year's Christmas would be...

FIVE

December 23 was clear and bright, not a trace of snow. However, NCIS was shifting into holiday mode at noon this year, with several staffing handovers that, in recent years, the Director found to be more helpful for a smooth transition and a more efficient response, if needed, given the changing terror threats that had developed world wide. This year, the Director allowed himself a real holiday, and though he would be nearby in Vermont with his kids, Deputy Director Craig had the office until January 2 unless a crisis occurred. Gibbs' team was out until December 27, and would have point through the rest of the holiday. Vance put his foot down that Gibbs would not be senior response lead during the 72 hour interim, but finally relented that he could be on call to Jerome as his Deputy saw fit.

To Gibbs' hidden disappointment, McGee didn't even volunteer for the on-call team. He reminded himself it was probably a lot healthier for Tim not to have done so, as this would be his first Christmas since he and Delilah were engaged. Despite his own father issues and his diligent, dedicated service to NCIS, the job had never filled as great a role in McGee's life as it had for Tony or himself. Maybe it was because McGee had always known that if, for whatever reason, he had to leave NCIS or law enforcement, he could be snapped up in any number of places – hell, his first paycheck could probably rival a year's pay at NCIS. Even so, Gibbs knew the difference between his past and present Senior Field Agents was more than that: Tim was committed to his service with the Agency and proud to serve his country as his father and grandfather had, but Tony had a need to be wanted, to be useful, and a part of things.

It was nearly 0800 by the time Gibbs had emerged from the Director's office, having caught up with Jerome as they waited for Leon to arrive and remind them both that while he appreciated Gibbs' offer to be on hand, he was certain that his Deputy Director and the on-call agents could handle whatever came up. Coming along the walkway outside of MTAC, Gibbs slowed to look down on the bullpen where Bishop and McGee were at their desks, both working at their computers but engaged in quiet conversation about their upcoming Christmas plans. Torres had slunk off at the close of work yesterday after asking for the day, knowing today would be a short one and there wouldn't be all that much to be done. Quinn's coat was on her chair but she wasn't in sight.

It wasn't fair to suddenly compare McGee to DiNozzo at every turn, he knew. It wasn't fair to compare every other field agent to Tony in evaluating them, any more than it would be to judge everyone on his team by McGee's computer skills. He used to assess strengths and weaknesses, and take advantage of the skills each brought to his team, he mused.

Maybe you're just looking to fill the DiNozzo-shaped hole on the team, no matter how many times you've tried to tell everyone it's not an issue.

As he watched the pair of agents below, apparently oblivious to being watched, Gibbs filtered it all through his weeks of being unsettled since DiNozzo left, as well as the hours he'd spent since Tony appeared, practically on his doorstep. Things change, Gunny. Things always change, he reminded himself, but it was only the rare occasion when life provided a do-over. He decided that this time, this was important enough to give it some thought.

With a last, slightly disappointed sigh that both of his agents were too wrapped up in what they were doing to sense his several minutes of scrutiny, Gibbs moved away from the railing toward the elevator. Ducky should be in, helping Jimmy get set up for any call outs that might occur over the next week or so. Maybe his friend had a bit of time for him as well.

The familiar whoosh of the pneumatic doors brought up Ducky's attention up to autopsy's entry, and his familiar greeting. "Ah, Jethro. All set for the hand-off?" Ducky's deceptively mild gaze was close and curious.

"Looks like you are, too, Duck," Gibbs grunted. Autopsy was clean, void of bodies, and all equipment stowed.

"Yes, but unlike you, Jethro, I am not all that inclined to look for an excuse to run out and get in the middle of any call that happens along," the elderly doctor chided, knowing how the enforced "vacation" chafed his friend. He'd heard Gibbs' grumbles about it since Vance decided to change up things this year. "However, I too will be on standby, should my goddaughter need a visit with Granducky if her father – or mother, of course, given the nature of her employment as well – is called out to work, I have a go-bag packed and at the ready. " He smiled in amusement at his own words. "Happily, this go-bag has no need of a liver probe. Perhaps you could do the same with Almira," Ducky tried, gently offering yet another suggestion that might entice Gibbs to make use of his downtime. "She does enjoy your wilderness lessons. With such a mild winter, it may be a good time for another day out tracking in the woods."

'Retirement lite' again? Gibbs thought, chafing a little at yet another of the doctor's increasingly pointed suggestions about what he could do when forced out of field work. Yet this time ... Gibbs looked at Ducky, suddenly struck by the thought that the man who had known him longer than anyone in his life also knew more about damn near everything than anyone else he knew. Maybe he ought to be listening more closely to what his friend had to offer. His first inclination had been to see Ducky about what Tony needed. After his observations upstairs that morning, and his recent thoughts about the loss of his team as it had been, it occurred to Gibbs that he probably could use some guidance too.

"You've been wrapping things up for a while now, getting ready to turn things over to Palmer," Gibbs observed, vaguely.

"Yes, I suppose I have." Ducky's expression was impressively neutral while his thoughts raced. Gibbs did not make small talk. And on the heels of his suggestion that Gibbs spend time with his own goddaughter, what with his friend being all but barred from working over Christmas – the doctor was on high alert for what might come next. He waited. Ducky knew that Gibbs would not speak readily if he could avoid it, so ... Ducky waited. Benignly. He knew Gibbs well enough to know that if the agent sought him out for conversation he would not leave without some resolution. The doctor was not disappointed.

"I always said that I would turn the team over to Tony when it was time, Ducky," Gibbs finally said, gazing off into his own thoughts. "t never occurred to me that he might not be here to take over."

Puzzled, Ducky hid his uncertainty where the discussion was going and sought to be encouraging, regardless of the path. "For many years, that was a completely reasonable assumption," he agreed.

"But I never planned for anything else." Gibbs was quiet for another moment, then added, "what we do, every day, there was no guarantee that Tony would want the lead. Or that, when I was ready to finally give it up, that he could take it." Again, a pause, and he admitted, "I just never made any other plans."

Ducky frowned lightly. "Are you thinking about stepping down yourself, Jethro?" When he had no immediate response, he urged, "is that what this is about?"

Gibbs grimaced slightly in frustration at the question. More than you know, Ducky, he thought, and more than I need right now. "Duck..." he started, the tone of trying to get his medical examiner on the same path he was on familiar to them both. "When DiNozzo left..." He wavered, multiple questions arising then dying on his tongue, before he finally managed, "what did he need to hear from me to make things right between us again?"

No matter how much he had readied for an unusual talk, Ducky's stunned reaction showed through clearly. "What did he need to hear...?" he echoed in amazement.

"Come on, Ducky! I need to know. Are you telling me that you didn't see that whatever working relationship I had DiNozzo got sidetracked in the end?"

The elderly man considered his friend carefully before he drew a steadying breath. "No, Jethro, on the contrary," Ducky began softly, his very measured tones surprising Gibbs and leaving little question that the man was disturbed by the question. "Things ... have not been as they were for a while now." Before Gibbs could fully register Ducky's apparent reference to more than only DiNozzo's time on the team, he went on, "some of it certainly was the normal progression and growth of your team. Every time you moved on from the two man team you were between Vivian's leaving and Kate joining us, and each time you took on new people, the dynamic changed." Ducky looked closely at Gibbs, and asked, carefully, "you understand that the change in your relationship with Anthony began many years before now?"

"Duck, I didn't want a history lesson," Gibbs groaned, "I just..."

"But you bloody well need one, Jethro, especially if you think a handful magic words to Anthony will suddenly 'fix' what he needs – what he deserves – to hear from you!" The Scotsman's eyes flashed suddenly with his frustration and anger. "If you honestly think it's only the last few months or even years that was a problem, well, my friend ..." Ducky took a breath, and steadied himself, reminding himself that if Jethro was finally ready to face this, ready to listen, then he must not squander the trust he'd placed in him to help him make up for lost time. "Then I believe you need to think again."

At least the Marine didn't storm out, but he pulled back, clearly not expecting the doctor's reaction. Seeing that he might have lost the opportunity to help his friends mend long neglected fences, the doctor took a steadying breath and tried again, in a calmer tone, "Why do you ask now, Jethro? What made you think of Anthony now?"

The agent remained quiet for long moments, unmoving, but finally chose to speak instead of leaving his demons unconfronted. "He's here, Duck. In the District. He and Tali came back."