Inspired by "Night," season 6, episode 20.

Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to Law & Order: SVU, its characters, or storylines. I make no money from this work of fiction, that is inspired by an episode, but otherwise created from my own mind. Any relation or resemblance to another story or a real life instance is purely coincidence.

Recovery

Chapter 5

kateandharvey

"Okay…" if Olivia wasn't confused earlier, she was definitely confused now. Casey watched as her brows furrowed slightly, and she had an immediate sense of regret at ever opening her mouth. "Then what is it?"

"What is what?" Everyone stop. Full force. Put the walls back up. Walk away. You're about to ruin this friendship, idiot.

Refusing to go down this same path of confusing questions answered with more questions, the brunette admonished, "Casey."

The ADA closed her eyes, taking in a deep breath. When she opened them, she forced herself to look right at the detective. "Perhaps now isn't a good time for this."

Olivia placed a hand on Casey's arm, and gave a soft squeeze. Now she wasn't confused. She was worried. "You can tell me anything."

She took a shaky breath. "I wasn't with Charlie when I was looking into the sperm donation." Sensing there was more, Olivia kept quiet. "It was after Charlie."

Feeling like she understood where the other woman was going, the detective said, "It's okay to move on." She smiled, rubbing her hand up and down the pale arm. "It's good, really. It doesn't mean you love them any less. I'm sure Charlie would be happy to know that you moved on, in fact."

Casey knew Olivia was misunderstanding, but she knew that if she didn't keep going, she would stop altogether. "I was engaged after Charlie." She whispered.

Clearly, something terrible had happened, Olivia assumed. "Okay," she paused, thinking, "and that's when you were looking into sperm donation?" The redhead nodded, tears quickly welling up in her eyes. "That's okay." The brunette continued to try and soothe. Whatever Casey was trying to tell her was important, and while she would testify that the ADA was probably her only friend, she wasn't an idiot. She knew not to push too hard on this. "What happened?"

"We broke up." The tears were spilling over from the eyes of the lawyer, and she swiped at them with her free arm. At Olivia's again repeated, "okay," Casey continued, her eyes finding those of the sex crimes detective. "But Olivia," she said, "that's not it." She took a breath, and in a whisper, said, "I was engaged, and was looking into sperm donors, and I thought for sure everything was going so well." She sighed, "It was so hard after Charlie, and I thought that maybe I'd finally come back from it." The detective didn't move a muscle. She continued sitting on the couch, hunched toward the other woman, with her hand running smoothly up and down the arm of the shaky ADA. She swallowed, "We broke up over having kids, ironically enough. I wanted them, and…" Olivia only blinked. "and she didn't."

If Olivia was surprised, she didn't show it. Softly, she said, "And that's it?" Casey nodded. "Okay." She said.

"Okay?" Casey asked, "Is that all you're going to say?"

"Well, how are you feeling about it, now?"

"About the break-up?" Casey asked, swiping at her face once again. Olivia nodded. "I'm fine, really. It was a long time ago, like I said. It was hard, then, but looking back, it was a good thing." She smiled, "I actually ran into Stephanie about a year ago, in Central Park. She was with her wife, and seemed to be doing well."

"How did that make you feel?" The detective asked.

Casey shrugged. "Fine." She smiled, "I always thought that if I ran into her, it would bother me, but the fact that I did, and wasn't bothered in the slightest, was a weight off." She laughed softly, "And before you ask me, no. They didn't have any kids." The detective smiled at her. "I used to think it was probably for the best. After I ran into her, I knew it was."

"That's good." The brunette whispered.

The redhead said nothing, but gave a sniffle. After a moment, she asked, "Are you mad at me?"

"What?" Olivia knew this was an emotional moment for her friend, and she was expecting a lot of things, but that wasn't one of them. "No. Why?"

The ADA shrugged, "I didn't tell you."

The detective tried to hide her slight smirk. "You didn't have to."

The eyes of the injured woman widened only slightly. "You knew?"

Olivia pulled back, her hand falling from the arm of the other woman, and Casey felt the cold air on her skin in its absence. "I…suspected."

"How?"

The brunette shrugged a single shoulder, "I just did."

"That's not a valid answer."

Olivia felt as close to Casey as she ever had, and as she probably ever would. With a face full of thought, the detective waved her hands around in the air as if there was something to grasp. "You ever-" she stopped, "-you ever meet someone and feel like they just get you?"

"Yes."

"That's how I feel." If there was one thing the detective hated, it was talking about her feelings. Yet, here she was, spilling them to a woman she would be secluded with, in the same living space, for some unseen amount of time. Ah, ah ah. The voice in her head reasoned, You're sharing with your friend. Olivia added, "about you."

Unable to hide her shock, Casey blurted, "Really?"

Olivia's brow furrowed slightly, and she looked at the other woman as if she had two heads. "Yeah…" she said, hesitantly, "I know you're the one with a head injury, but I am older. So maybe my thought process is messy, but I was under the impression that we were co-workers, but also friends."

"We are."

"Good friends, even."

"I would agree." She nodded.

"Then why are you so surprised that I feel comfortable with you?"

"I don't know." Casey said. "I guess, I just thought… if you knew…"

A single eyebrow arched on the other woman's face, "I would suddenly assume you were attracted to me and run the other direction?" Casey looked at her guiltily. "C'mon, Casey! Give me more credit than that." She reached out, grasping the other woman's wrist with her hand again. "You're my friend. I really appreciate you trusting me. I suspected, but I wasn't sure, and I wasn't going to say anything until you were comfortable enough to tell me." She smiled, "I don't care about who you find yourself attracted to, dating, or sleeping with. As my friend, I really just want you to be happy."

Casey smiled at her.

"I also want all the details."

The ADA laughed. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." The detective smiled.

They were both quiet for a moment when Casey asked, "Did you know… about Steph?"

Olivia shook her head. "No."

"Then tell me how you knew." Casey said.

Sighing, Olivia straightened herself on the couch. "I had a suspicion, like I said. I didn't know. But, if you're looking for me to go all detective on you-"

"-I am-"

"Then I would say it was the softball, for one."

"That's a stereotype!" Casey laughed, "I suppose a rather popular one, but a stereotype nonetheless."

Olivia laughed with her, "Do you truly want to know?" At Casey's nod, she said, "When you talked about dates, you would always use he or him. But when you would talk about the future, about a partner or a spouse, you would always say they or them. At first I thought you were just trying to be more proactive in your language use, but then I started to think there might be a reason." She smiled, "Any time after that, when I asked you about flowers in your office, or about a hot date, you always seemed startled when I would say him."

Casey shook her head in mild disbelief. "I should've known, being friends with a detective."

Olivia nodded, laughing. "You should've."

The ADA turned to look at the brunette earnestly, and placed a single hand on her wrist. "Thank you, Olivia." The detective smiled in return. "For being such a good friend."

The other woman placed her own hand over the lawyer's on her wrist. "Always."

Maybe this could be good for both of them.