Ellana woke before the sun rose. With Solas sound asleep, she wrapped herself in one of the bedsheets and sat in an alcove by the window. She gazed out on the sleeping world intent on thought. She knew he loved her, he had made that clear last night but even still, she wondered. If he had been given his way, she never would have seen him again. She sat until the sun peeked over the horizon. As light slowly bathed the room, Ellana heard him shifting in the bed.

"You are awake," Solas eventually said.

They both knew they needed to talk before this could continue. Last night had been too overwhelming for them both, too sudden. There had been no real opportunity to understand where they both stood. Ellana was still hurting; she could not let go of the years of pain he had given her that easily. He came to sit beside her, not bothering with a sheet and a silence passed between them.

"Four years…" Ellana started. "Four years we wasted." She turned to him with eyes bleeding desperation but his gaze remained fixed forward. "When you told me everything I wanted to come with you. You knew we wanted the same things." She reached out to touch him. "I wanted to spend whatever days we had left together. I didn't want to be protected, I wanted you."

Solas did not respond immediately. He was considering if he should say more, ashamed by his own weakness.

"I did not leave just to protect you, vhenan," he started, closing his eyes in mirthless resignation. "Do you remember that time in the woods? We had just returned to Skyhold from some horrendous excursion, I forget which…" He smiled, turning to her at last. "We went for a walk alone in the woods and you told me about your life before the Inquisition."

"Yes, I remember. It was nice…" Ellana interjected, confused about where this story was going.

"You were picking flowers and I remember looking at you; just looking at you. I thought about what I had planned, how going through with it would take you from me…" He turned away from her again. "For the first time I doubted myself; questioned everything I had ever wanted." His eyes met hers, twinkling with utter regret. "When I took you to that glade and removed your Vallaslin I had intended to tell you everything. If you had accepted me for what I was, I intended to abandon my plan and build a life with you. I was so close but in the end I just couldn't. After that, I was too afraid to keep you near. Afraid I would not be able to do what I must."

Ellana smiled. She would never agree with his choice to leave but she felt she could at least understand.

"Surely you still feel that way and yet, here I am? Something must have changed?" she asked, reaching out almost instinctually to touch his arm.

"You have. When you told me you wanted to come with me you did not know what that meant but now… You came here of your own free will, you who knows better than most what the end will bring. You have accepted it beyond anything I could ever have imagined."

After some consideration she spoke, "You're right. The elven people… I know you do not think of them as your people but they are."

Solas wanted to argue but thought better of it.

"They are the direct descendants of the people you tried to save. Years of slavery and subjugation have twisted them from what you once knew but that does not change their origins. If we do nothing, will our people ever find anything beyond oppression and pain? I have seen nothing in this world that makes me believe that they will. We are lost and if something does not change we will remain lost or gone from this world entirely. I want more for our people, even if it means destroying every part of them that I have ever known. I won't let you abandon our cause."

He took her hand and pulled her in to an embrace, her head resting against his chest. They sat in silence for a time. As dawn broke they talked more. They agreed that they would try and keep their relationship as inconspicuous as possible, at least for now. Neither thought it would last; nothing goes unnoticed when spies surround you. With the orb destroyed in their battle with Corypheus, she had an idea what he must be trying to achieve but she wanted to know everything. She wanted to help him as best she could. However, she felt it was not her place to ask. She was still a lowly foot-soldier. She did not want to abuse their relationship to gain knowledge well above her station. She left after the sun had risen beyond the horizon with an agreement that she would return at dusk. It gave Solas time to attend to his duties and Ellana time to deal with the fallout from the events of the last night.

The camps were still quiet as Ellana left the tower. Those that were awake appeared too busy to take any notice of her. Most were packing up to move out. When Ellana reached her friends' encampment, only Daman was visible. She imagined he found sleep difficult with his wounds, a satisfying thought given the way he had behaved towards her. He looked startled at the sight of her and she regretted her satisfaction – after all, he had been her friend up until this point. He rose quickly with a wince of pain to hurry her out of earshot of the others.

"I'm so sorry for my behaviour last night. I…" he started, sounding almost afraid of her. "I told them it was an accident. My own doing. Lis wasn't buying it; she was the only one that saw him; but the others… I didn't want…"

Ellana cut him off, "You didn't want to tell them you were trying to force yourself on me."

He let out a pained grunt. "I'm so sorry. I didn't think and the alcohol…"

"Not an excuse," she replied curtly.

She was done talking with him and despite his continued attempts to regain her attention, she marched off to their camp. The others were out of their tents.

"Where did you go? We were worried!" Lori asked with a look of relief on her face.

"I just needed some time alone. No cause for concern," Ellana replied.

"Good to have you back," Garith said.

Lori continued asking questions but Ellana ignored her. Lis said nothing as she stood in the mouth of her tent until Ellana entered and hugged her, taking her by surprise.

"Well you owe me an explanation," Lis said. She sounded annoyed but made no moves to break away from Ellana's embrace. "I can't believe you just ran off and left me to deal with your drama for the whole damn night!"

"I'm sorry! I had to talk to him and things…things happened…" Ellana replied, bowing her head in sheepish guilt.

She told Lis everything – leaving out the more lewd details.

"Fuck Daman. I knew he liked you but I didn't think he'd stoop so low. To think, I spent the whole night helping to back up his stupid story! You should have stabbed him," Lis said angrily.

Ellana chuckled lightly. "I didn't have any weapons. Besides, he was already being dealt with before I thought I would need to get physical. He's going to be okay though?" she asked, concerned for him in spite of his actions.

"He'll be fine. He'll have some scars but that's probably a good thing. A nice reminder that no means no."

"Good. He's lucky he didn't get killed. Anyway, it's probably for the best that you backed him up, better everyone believes his story. The truth…well…that could just lead to further questions," Ellana mused.

"I guess you're right. The real story is just as unbelievable as his rubbish anyway." With a smirk Lis changed the subject to Solas, "So you're back together. How's that going to work? We're never here and it's not like he's going to come and hang out with us in the field."

"I don't know. I guess we'll make it work somehow."

It seemed foolish now but Ellana had not really thought about it. Solas would have. He had a plan for everything.

The day passed by quietly. Daman was understandably reserved which gave the rest of the group a pleasant reprieve. He left to have another meeting with Agent Hurand mid-afternoon. Ellana was pleased at his departure. He had been looking at her differently and while she did not think he would ask questions directly, it concerned her. He must have wondered why Fen'Harel had saved her from him and how Ellana, a lowly agent, had been able to order him to stop his attack.

When Daman returned, he had some news - a new job. They were to leave for Orlais in two days and meet up with another group. Ellana had seen it coming but she still felt apprehensive. She worried most about Daman. She did not know if she could ever take him seriously again after what he had done and the idea of taking orders from him disgusted her. It was difficult to admit to herself but she also did not want to leave Solas. The news made it more difficult for Ellana to leave for her their planned meeting. Everyone was buzzing and there did not seem to be an appropriate break in conversation. When they finally calmed down, Ellana took her opportunity. She told her friends she was going for a walk and proceeded to the tower. Lis knew better of course but Ellana trusted she would keep it to herself - even if she did wiggle her eyebrows mockingly as Ellana left.

Ellana reached his door quickly but knocked before she entered, concerned she might interrupt. Solas's voice was quiet at first but loudened as he urged her inside. He was seated at his desk studying books and papers, not taking a moment to look up as she entered. She could see that one of the papers he was looking at was the map her and her teammates had worked so hard to procure.

"Vhenan, I was afraid you had changed your mind," he said, rising to his feet and finally granting her his gaze. He embraced her and perched himself on the edge of the desk.

"Sorry I'm a bit late. It was more difficult to get away than I envisaged," Ellana replied apologetically.

"It's quite alright. I understand you…"

She cut him off with a long kiss. After a short while he pulled away and touched her face, looking in to her eyes.

"There will be time for that." He smiled warmly. "There is…something I wanted to discuss with you first…"

"I know. We're moving out soon, so I hear," Ellana said, failing to hide the disappointment in her tone.

"About that, I…" He paused. He wanted to tell her that he could not bear her leaving but he needed to ask something of her and did not want to influence her decision prematurely. "Ellana, your skills are wasted in your current position. You once led an army; working as a simple foot soldier was never worthy of you." He paused. "If you are willing, I would ask that you form your own unit. You would be in command - reporting directly to me. The tasks you would be undertaking would be far more complicated than what you have been used to but well within your capabilities." He paused and contemplated her features, awaiting a response.

Her brow furrowed deeply. "You're not just doing this to keep me close, are you?"

"Although that will be a welcome side benefit, no, I am not. I'm offering you this because it would be the best way to use your skills. You are a valuable asset, Ellana. You could accomplish a great deal if utilized properly."

"This is a lot to take in. I would have to leave my friends," she replied, pulling away from him slightly.

"You could take them with you? I could find others to fill their positions and…"

"No," she interrupted as she began to pace with nerves. "Even with what he did, I could never do that to Daman. He would have to build an entirely new team from the ground up. It would set their work back. It's not right. I… I need to think about this."

Solas took a steadying hold of her. "I know. We have time, vhenan. Think about it. I will accept whatever you may choose."

"Alright, I'll think about it," she said, gazing up at him until the anxiety dissipated from her eyes.

His thumb grazed against her cheek. "Good. Now with that out of the way," he continued, smiling broadly, "Where were we?"

"Oh I don't know." She walked two fingers up his chest teasingly. "Your serious ways made me forget."

"Naughty girl," he tutted before pulling her in to a passionate kiss.

As they melted in to one another he could feel an ache building in his chest. He ached knowing no matter what he did, he was going to eventually be without her. The thought obviously hurt him but he could not help feel a sliver of joy. Joy knowing that he had something so good that it would destroy him to lose it.

Ellana awoke with the sun already at full height. Solas was not in the bed with her. On further inspection, he was not even in the room. Ellana pulled her tunic over her head. It went some way to preserve her modesty but left a lot of leg still on show. Angered that he had allowed her to sleep so late, she proceeded through to his study and found him poring over yet more notes, half-dressed. She took a moment to observe his form before speaking. His upper body was surprisingly toned for someone who shied away from the more physical forms of combat.

"You shouldn't have let me sleep so late! It must be nearly mid-day," she said in a disgruntled tone.

He did not look up as he replied, "You looked so peaceful. Besides, you clearly needed it."

"You know I would sleep for days if given half a chance."

Ellana perched herself on the edge of the desk and yet more leg peeked from beneath her tunic. From what she could see, he was making notes on something. To her surprise, he was writing entirely in ancient Elvhen.

"It never occurred to me that Elvhen is, of course, your mother tongue," she mused, feeling rather dim. "When we met you spoke our language so fluently; it just didn't cross my mind. How did you learn it so well?"

He barely looked up, absorbed in his work. "As I slumbered all those years I walked the fade, as you know. Your language became a regular occurrence, even there. What I did not learn then, I grasped when I awoke. I was immersed in this culture for a year before we met. It did not take long to become fluent in the language."

"Even still, what you can achieve never ceases to..."

A knock at the door interrupted Ellana and to her shock, Solas immediately bid the unknown party entery. She leapt from the table, trying in vain to maintain her modesty as Varden entered.

"Solas!" she whined, lightly shoving his shoulder.

"He already knows about us, don't you Elris?" he said, annoyingly disinterested in anything but his work.

"Of course," Varden stated evenly.

"I would be disappointed if he had failed to notice, given the trust I place in him. Besides, we were not what I would call subtle," Solas retorted, finally looking at her with a smug smile.

"My lord, I have news that requires your attention," Varden interjected, business-like as usual.

Ellana had asked Solas about Varden during one of their discussions. She found it curious that Solas, a man who generally viewed the modern elves with disdain, could form such a close working relationship with one of them. In their time talking about him, Solas had told Ellana that Varden had an uncomfortable preference for titles. Solas did not consider himself worthy of any title but despite his attempts to get Varden to stop, he persisted. Solas told her he had stopped trying anymore. Ellana found his discomfort thoroughly amusing. It was funny seeing a man who was always so in control being bothered by such a trivial detail.

"One of our agents within the Inquisition arrived here last night and what she reported was troubling to say the least," Varden continued.

Mention of the Inquisition grabbed Ellana's attention. She looked at Solas - both surprise and concern registering across his features.

"The situation has gotten a lot worse than we thought," Varden went on with a sigh. "They're imprisoning many of the elves in their employ without any real justification. They're interrogating some. This explains why all our agents have gone dark."

Solas moved to stand at the window looking dejected. "How many of ours are imprisoned?"

"Four. One was killed when he tried to escape," Varden said sadly.

Solas had also told Ellana that Varden cared deeply for each agent within the organisation. It was part of the reason he was so well respected amongst them.

"They're killing people just for trying to leave?" Solas asked with disbelief.

"Our agent told me that suspicion is so high that any elf trying to leave is assumed to be one of ours and treated as such. With a choice of either imprisonment or to fight, I know what I would choose."

Ellana could not believe what she was hearing. She never thought any of her former colleagues could treat people in such a way. She felt immense guilt. This would not be happening if she had stayed. She got up to leave. It was not her place to be listening to this sort of information. Further, she did not think she could stomach hearing more. Solas looked concerned as she left but said nothing. That was a discussion best kept until after Varden left.

Ellana had bathed while she awaited Varden's departure. She was rather fond of the large wooden tub in the tower. She found the warmth of the water soothing and it had given her plenty of time to think. Thinking more on the Inquisition, she regretted her earlier views. She knew her colleagues had little choice but to act as they had. They could not allow potential spies leave to return to their master with all their secrets. These thoughts did nothing to take away the guilt she felt. She knew she had to do something to help the trapped agents. When she exited in to the bedroom, she saw Solas seated by the fire. He was fully dressed now and was reading. She sat herself in the seat opposite him as he closed his book.

"I want my own unit," she started abruptly. "You were right. There's so much more I could be doing to help. I can't just stand by. I want to do everything I can."

He sighed. "You want to go after the agents in the Inquisition, don't you?" he asked, knowing the answer already.

"Yes. What they're going through is all my fault. If I could just…"

He cut her off, "Actually it is entirely my fault. I am the one who sent them there – the blame is mine alone." He paused; wanting to ensure his words had fully sunken in. "If you wish to try and help them, you have my full support but I will tell you what I told Varden – I am not endangering more agents in the attempt."

"But I…" Ellana tried to argue but he immediately cut her off.

"And before you say it, you are not going yourself. Some hair dye may have worked on strangers but it will not work on them."

"I could reason with them, bargain for their release," she added desperately.

"You know how foolish that would be, vhenan," he said in a markedly softer tone. "They would never let you leave, let alone the agents."

Ellana was annoyed that he was denying her but she knew he was right. Going to the Inquisition herself would achieve nothing and could put her in danger.

"I believe you are more than capable of coming up with a plan we can use. When you do, I will help you in any way I can," he said, reaching out to her in a reassuring gesture. "For now, you have other concerns. You cannot achieve anything without others; you need to choose your own agents."

Ellana had forgotten this part of Solas's proposal. She had been too focused on the Inquisition. She knew few people within the organisation well. She had no idea who she wanted to work with - except one.

"I'm going to ask Lis today. I trust her completely and she is very good at what she does. She'd be perfect," Ellana replied.

Solas smiled. It was an obvious choice. He knew little of Lis but he could tell they were close. He had queried Varden about her and he had described her as a very competent agent, if a bit loud and obnoxious at times. Solas saw no reason to object.

"I have no idea who else I could pick. I don't really know anyone," Ellana continued, fidgeting outside of her awareness.

"I could consult with Varden for you if you would like but in my opinion, these things are best left to happen naturally. Better to give it time and find people you feel you can rely on," Solas mused.

She sighed. "True. It's strange; I never thought I would be back in this role again."

"Leadership is what you were born for, Ellana. I am certain you will have no trouble," he said, reaching out to touch her hand reassuringly.

"Well I guess we both have a lot of work to do." She got up with a groan.

He rose to his feet as well. "I'm afraid so. I'll see you tonight?" he asked hopefully.

"Definitely," she replied, kissing him as she left.

A/N - This chapter was updated on 19/02/18.