As Ginny had predicted, there was a line outside the door to the women's loo, but no one waiting for the gent's. It didn't make the situation any less embarrassing, of course, especially when Leandra raised her eyebrows at Ginny and tried to give her a high-five as Harry guided her past.
"Isn't that Harry Potter?" someone else asked as they walked by, but Ginny didn't even turn around to see who it was. She was certain she'd get grilled by her flatmates later and she'd have to have her story straight by then. Some of the Harpies knew she and Harry had once dated, but they hadn't spent a lot of time together around her teammates. Harry had been somewhat uncomfortable to stay over at her flat, so they usually had gone to his. He had come to every game he could, but he had usually stayed in the background as much as possible, especially after the matches, when the crowds and the press would not have given them a moment alone anyway.
When they'd broken up, Ginny had downplayed the importance of the relationship so that she didn't have to talk about it too much, and the subject had died fairly quickly, as if Harry had been just another Auror having a fling with just another Harpy.
What hadn't died, however, was her teammates ribbing about Ginny's celibate status ever since. Leandra and Evie had made it their own personal mission to get Ginny laid, and it was getting wearing. Maybe seeing us will shut them up, she thought.
Despite the knowing smirks from her teammates who had seen them come out of the loo, most of the patrons seemed fairly oblivious. Scanning the crowded main room, Ginny was more than relieved not to see even a hint of Weasley red; the last thing either she or Harry needed was to have any of her brothers aware of what had happened. Her family had taken the break up even harder than she or Harry had, Ginny sometimes thought.
Harry guided them to a small alcove table towards the back of the pub. "What do you want to drink? Are you hungry? I can go to the bar . . . but can you have alcohol, or does Gwenog have rules about that?" He prattled on nervously, rocking back and forth on his feet while Ginny sat down.
Ginny looked at him closely for a second, trying to figure out what was wrong. Maybe he had broken some Auror rule, by fooling around with someone he was supposed to be protecting. But that didn't make any sense; she'd seen plenty of young Aurors chatting up her teammates and other Quidditch players, and she knew for a fact (thanks to Leandra's drunken ramblings), that some of them were having sex. And in places even more odd than a pub bathroom.
Maybe he was worried about the press. Harry kept such a low profile that he managed to stay out of the papers most of the time, and his quiet personal life these past months had seemed to help deflate interest in his comings and goings. Ginny didn't know if curiosity in him would be rekindled if word of their tryst got out; somehow she doubted that Harry's love life had become so uninteresting that he could totally let his guard down these days, as if he was just an ordinary bloke.
But Ginny saw no flashes of cameras waiting to capture their faces and the din of the pub was as noisy as ever. Harry was still looking at her, waiting for something as he stood beside their booth. And it bothered her, although at first she couldn't put her finger on why.
"No, I can drink," she finally said. When he continued to look at her inquisitively, she added, "a glass of goblin-made wine, please." Harry nodded, and disappeared into the crowd, and Ginny realized what felt off.
Just as Harry no longer knew what she liked to drink in a pub, she wasn't at all sure what exactly he wanted to talk to her about. Despite the emotional detachment that she had carefully cultivated (helped along by both time and magic), it was disconcerting to realize that she could no longer look at Harry's face and know everything he was thinking.
Ginny sighed. It made sense, she supposed. They had not been together for almost ten months. Still, the ease with which they had come together to couple, even after all that time, had masked the distance between them. She'd had no trouble understanding what Harry had wanted in the woods yesterday; she had easily seen the conflict between his transparent desire for sex and his even stronger need to be an Auror and protect her. That the two desires had lined up (for about ten minutes, at least), was probably dumb luck on their part.
And tonight . . . well, yesterday had probably just made him as randy as it had made her. Just one of those things that happens between exes occasionally, she supposed.
Harry came back carrying their drinks and a plate of biscuits. He set them down on the table and stood looking down at the table before awkwardly sliding into the seat opposite her.
Not next to her. Right.
Ginny considered trying to lighten the mood by making a joke about how long he'd been gone and whether he'd run into another Chaser by the loo. She just as immediately rejected the idea; it wasn't really a funny joke. She fiddled with the stem of her wine glass, twirling it around and watching the wine swirl inside while Harry took mechanical drink after drink of his ale. Finally, he looked up at her.
"Ginny, I . . ." he broke off and looked back down at the table and Ginny saw him take a deep breath. When he looked back up at her, his eyes were soft. "I'm sorry."
Ginny had no trouble reading his expression this time. Harry felt guilty about . . . something. And pretending not to understand why just to draw it out of him would only prolong the awkwardness. Besides, Ginny had a pretty good idea what was bothering him. She was direct.
"For shagging me? Or for shagging me in the woods and a loo when you were supposed to be working?"
Harry looked surprised. "No! Not because we had sex, I mean . . . that doesn't . . . I had . . ." He peered at her. "Unless of course it bothers you." It was almost a question, and he hesitated, as if fearing the answer.
Ginny shook her head. "I told you yesterday, I enjoyed it. And I did." She blushed, of course. "And just now, too."
Harry relaxed. "Good. I did too. A lot." He put extra emphasis on the last word and Ginny couldn't help but laugh as some of the tension between them drained away. Harry looked at her earnestly. "But we should still talk about it. What it means, and what we're going to tell people. And whether we're . . ." he trailed off.
Ginny looked closely at him. "Whether we're going to, what? Do you mean . . .?"
Harry had a strangely hopeful look on his face. As odd as it was to have to relearn how to read him, Ginny was certain he was not asking if she wanted to get back together. She watched his fingers, nervously picking apart a biscuit and scattering the crumbs on the table, and catalogued his appearance. The circles under his eyes were deep, like they got whenever he was particularly engrossed in a case and didn't sleep. But even sitting here with her, they occasionally darted around the room, checking faces, mapping out the location of the door. Twice she saw his hand twitch towards his wand, then relax.
He was looking away again, this time towards the bar where Gwenog and some of the other players were laughing over pints of beer, dropping steaming shots of something inside them and then chugging the entire concoction down in one go. His forehead was wrinkled in thought and again Ginny was struck with the feeling of not knowing.
"You're sure you don't want to be with them?" He gestured to the bar and her teammates.
"Harry, I said it's fine. I don't need to get wasted with them every time." Ginny grimaced. "Anyway, someone has to make sure no one splinches themselves on the way home, and brew the hangover potion in the morning." She put her hand on his. "Unless . . . do you need to be working?"
Harry shook his head. "No, I'm fine. I got what I needed earlier and I can write the report tomorrow morning." He frowned for a second. "Is this the only pub the Harpies like to go to? Or could you switch to another one, for a while? It's just . . ." he glanced around again, lowering his voice. "I think it might be . . . better."
"You've found something out, haven't you? About who attacked us yesterday." Ginny allowed herself a small smile of understanding. This whole thing was about Harry's need to work. But Harry was shaking his head.
"I don't know . . ., maybe. It's more a . . . a feeling, you know? I'd just like it better if you weren't around here so much, for the next couple of weeks."
"Well, we won't be, anyway," Ginny reminded him. "We have a road trip coming up, remember?"
Harry nodded. "Right. Good." He shuffled his glass around in his hand and took a breath. "Which is why I think we should talk about . . . this" – he gestured between them and nodded his head towards the loo – "now." He looked back at Ginny. "I was just wondering what you were thinking, other than the fact that you liked it, of course." He gave her a smile that was only half a smirk and Ginny could see he really wanted her to answer.
Ginny was still. Should she tell him? It could make things awkward. Well, more awkward. And they'd been getting to a nice place between them too.
But watching Harry's face, Ginny suddenly understood his hopeful look. Actually, it was both hopeful . . . and hungry. She shivered, the memory of Harry thrusting into her suddenly very clear in her mind. She knew what he wanted her to say, knew it as clearly as if he'd said it out loud. She finished his earlier sentence for him.
"You want to know if we're going to do this," – she tilted her own head towards the loo – "again."
Now it was Harry's turn to blush. "Well, yeah," he admitted. "I was wondering, you know, I mean, you liked it, and I liked it, and, it's not like either of us are involved with anyone else, so . . ." He opened his hands as if to say why not? and looked at Ginny with a grin.
"Why not, indeed," she murmured, thinking. For a moment, common sense reigned. "I don't know, Harry, do you think it's a good idea?" A second later, her libido knocked common sense unconscious. "I mean," she added hastily, "it is a good idea, in a lot of ways. Brilliant, even, if we can figure out how . . . or what, you know? So that it works? So we can know what to expect?"
Harry's eyes lit up when he caught the gist of her babbling. "Like rules, you mean." He looked delighted that Ginny was apparently agreeing with his idea.
And Ginny wasn't disagreeing. Part of her (the part that had been getting quite a bit of attention lately), was already tingling. She just wanted to make sure they were actually both on the same page, first.
"Well, yeah. like rules," she said. "Or something." She shrugged. "I don't exactly know where to start, though. I mean, it's not like I've ever done this before."
Harry raised his eyebrows. "And I have?" He grinned. "It'll be easy. We already know enough about each other, like our work schedules and habits, things like that. And it's not like . . . I mean, we both agree that there are no strings attached, right? This is just for fun. Between friends. Who like to . . . have sex with each other occasionally. Or more often."
"I think it's called being 'friends with benefits'" said Ginny. "And yeah. No strings attached. Just for fun." She paused. "But what does that mean, exactly?"
Harry pursed his lips, thinking. "Well, for one, I think it means that we don't tell anyone – especially our friends and families, what we are doing. We don't need the pressure, you know?"
Ginny wholeheartedly agreed with that. If her mum got even a hint that she and Harry had been spending any time together, hell, she'd probably invite them to the Burrow to have sex and set the silencing charms herself, as long as they promised to get married immediately afterwards. And Ron and Hermione would be impossible in their own ways. Secret was better.
Ginny didn't really count the fact that some of her teammates knew, given hers and Harry's not so subtle trip into the loo. But they wouldn't talk. It was kind of understood. They might rib Ginny herself, but that was it.
"Right," said Ginny. "And how about . . . it's just for sex. I mean, I don't expect you to take me out on dates or anything like that. It would kind of defeat the purpose, wouldn't it?"
"Right," Harry agreed after a moment. "Just sex." He furrowed his brow, thinking. "And how about . . . something about how we can't interfere with the other's work? Like, I won't come down to see you after a Harpies match and expect you to go off and have sex with me instead of celebrating with your team."
This made Ginny pause. Having sex with Harry after the Harpies won a game had been something she had usually looked forward to, when they were dating. The excitement in the air, the sweat, the adrenaline rush, not to mention the fact that they almost never made it all the way home first, had made most of those encounters hot. But . . . if they relaxed that rule, Harry would probably feel compelled to let her come to his office or something. She nodded in agreement.
"Just like I won't come visit you at your office," said Ginny. Then she giggled. "But, remember when I did that? Disguised to look like someone from Magical Maintenance to fix the enchanted window in your office?"
Harry swallowed. "Yeah . . . I remember that," he said thickly. "That was actually . . . well, I wouldn't . . . I mean, that kind of thing could still be included, don't you think? Once in a while?"
Relief flooded through Ginny. "Yeah. Once in a while. After matches too. If we happen to be in the same place. And . . .as long as . . . how about, as long as we don't plan it ahead of time, and if it's a bad time, we just go our separate ways, no questions?"
Harry nodded firmly. "Right. No questions asked." He looked confused for a moment. "So that means we can't just call each other for sex, right?"
Ginny smirked. "How do you think Kingsley would feel if my Patronus appeared in the middle of a meeting asking you to meet me in the Atrium in ten minutes, and, oh yeah, make sure you're not wearing anything under your robes?"
"Right," said Harry. "No calling. It has to be spontaneous. And . . . I guess, well . . ." He looked at Ginny. "It seems like we're agreeing that we're mostly going to be . . . you know, in, umm, locations, where we could be discovered, right?"
Remembering the woods, Ginny clenched her thighs together. She loved having sex outside. "Right. Should that be a rule?"
"Well, not a rule, exactly," said Harry slowly, "but I think we probably should agree to keep most of our clothes on, more or less. I mean, obviously it's better for you if you aren't naked in a public place. You have more to, umm, hide." He blushed. "It's pretty easy for me to just, well, unzip . . . and, well, you have to . . . unless you're wearing a skirt. Without knickers," he amended. "Not that I think you should . . . I mean," he added hastily. "You look great in pants too! And you can wear whatever knickers you want! I didn't mean to say . . . oh buggers."
Ginny couldn't help but laugh at him. "It's okay, Harry. I get it. No total nudity, knickers optional."
He smiled sheepishly. "I'm making this difficult, aren't I?"
"Not yet." Ginny bit her lip. One part of her brain had been whirling with thought the entire time she and Harry had been talking, considering and rejecting various scenarios. Some of them were fun, (sex in the Ministry of Magic?) but at the same time, she couldn't ignore the memories (because there were still plenty of them there), of previous times she and Harry had been together. It didn't hurt, exactly, to think of them, not anymore, but at the same time, she didn't really want to remember their very first time making love (in his flat, by candlelight, the night after Remus and Tonks' funeral), or consider going back to Hogwarts and finally having sex in the Room of Requirement. She and Harry had often discussed, in some detail, how they'd want to Room to look when they got there, but nothing had ever come of it.
So yes, there were a few things that needed to be said.
"I think we need to avoid discussing our past. Together, I mean," she said firmly. "Except maybe as it relates to what we like . . . physically. We need to treat what we're doing now as totally new."
To her surprise, Harry agreed almost immediately, and strongly. "Yes. Right. The past is off-limits." He had a kind of strange look on his face when he spoke; his eyes looked far away, as if he was trying to remember something, and Ginny wondered, briefly, if he was thinking about some past time together as well. Then he shook his head and smiled. "Okay, we're doing good. I think we're about there." He frowned. "Except . . ."
"What?"
Harry looked uncomfortable. "Look, I know we both already admitted that we haven't . . . or even wanted to . . . with anyone else. Since we broke up. Right?"
"Right," agreed Ginny, wondering where he was going.
"Well, umm, it probably goes without saying, and, I know that I won't want to . . . with anyone else, but I think it should be clear anyway . . . even though there are no strings attached, we probably shouldn't be . . ."
"Ohhhh," said Ginny. "No, I agree. No sex with anyone else while we're . . ." – she gestured between them with her hand – "you know."
But Harry has to attend functions for work, Ginny thought suddenly to herself. Functions where a date might be required, or at least recommended. She had been to a few of those herself, when they had been dating and it seemed like every time he turned around, Harry was being honored as the "Savior of the Wizarding World." She frowned to herself, unable to stop from wondering who he had been taking with him these last months.
"Although, if you needed to, you know, ask someone else out, for work . . ." began Ginny slowly.
"Or if you wanted to," interjected Harry. "Like for that Quidditch awards dinner they have every year . . ." His voice trailed off and he bit his lip. Ginny was still.
"I mean, we did say 'no strings attached,' right?" asked Harry, hesitantly.
Ginny nodded, almost to herself. "I took Charlie to the last awards dinner," she said quietly, looking down at the table.
"They had a big statue unveiling ceremony and party in Godric's Hollow last month." Harry wasn't looking at her as he spoke, and Ginny didn't ask. Then,
"I went for the ceremony only. By myself," Harry admitted, giving her a wry smile. "So I guess we're even."
Ginny let out a breath. "Well. Okay then." She paused. "Anything else?"
Harry smiled. "I think that covers it." He took a big drink from his pint. "Wow," he said. "I didn't think . . . you know."
Ginny did know. "Yeah," she said. "I think this could work for us."
