There was no rest for the weary, or at least it felt that way to Sirius as he made his way out of the Royal offices, after yet another long evening of trying to help James hold the bloody crown that none of them had been ready for him to wear.
With significant help from Sir Remus, they finalized the plans for the defenses of the borderlands, and had a contingency for surrounding and blockading the castle at Semprapuria. He'd hoped he was good and done for the night. He'd been restless the night prior and the moment he closed his eyes he saw his brother Regulus's face. His face as it had been all those years ago. That child's face, and the look of disappointment in his eyes stuck with Sirius more than anything. He couldn't meet him now, as a man on a battlefield… The thought was sickening. He was fairly confident now that he wouldn't need to, at least not at this juncture. But he was nearly dizzy with fatigue and not in the mood to hand out favors. Was pointing out the weaknesses in his own family not enough for one day?
It seemed as if it wasn't. At least not according to the resident Princess at court, who apparently had a penchant for wandering the halls late at night. As soon as Sirius saw her approaching, he sighed, mourning the moments of peace that were slipping from his grasp as she took his arm.
Which in and of itself was strange and forward behavior, but she was James's cousin so what else could he expect, really?
"So listen," she said quietly, "I need your help with something."
"Unless you need help being pointed in the vague direction of 'elsewhere' then you're out of luck, Princess. I'm kicking off for the night."
She didn't flinch at the less than proper form of address. She was the very image of the princess in fairy story filled with tales of honor and chivalry. Sirius would know, because he'd read them all in his youth. They'd served as a good tool in forgetting that he was the son of Walburga Black and giving him something to mold himself after. He got the impression that Princess Marlene didn't have to mold herself to the likeness of Guinevere of Cornwall or Nimue of the Lake. He may have read those tales voraciously but she'd probably lived them. It wouldn't have surprised him if she'd once been held captive by a dragon in a tower. He'd imagined, given this whole air that bounced off her just as the light reflected off her gold-blonde hair, that she'd get indignant over the teasing. He had to remind himself again that she was James's cousin, of course she'd find no fault in the mocking use of her title.
"It's not something you have to do today. Here. We'll walk while I explain. That can only help."
She had a glint of mischief in her bright blue eyes. Sirius wasn't sure what to make of that, or of her in general. He'd grown up hearing James' tales of 'Cousin Marly' and this woman was not at all what he'd pictured. It was too much of a task for his already tired mind to adjust his view of the world to one where this person could exist. He needed at least a good night's sleep before even starting in on that, and besides, what did it matter? What did she want with him anyway?
"It'll help what? Your ability to multitask?"
"Charming." She rolled her eyes, "No. It'll help for us to be seen together." Her tone was as casual and mocking as his own.
Sirius did a very poor job at reigning in his facial expressions. Another product of exhaustion, he supposed. He felt himself blink several times in quick succession, and shake his head slightly so as to reorient. King James's cousin Marly was a right nutter. That was the only logical conclusion.
"What are you playing at?"
"You heard me yesterday. Being a very marriageable heiress to the throne has gotten to be unmanageable. I thought that you could help me out by being something of a decoy. If they think that I'm spoken for perhaps the Lords of Lechery will find a new hobby."
Sirius didn't have the patience for this. Not today. "A decoy? You do realize that I have a job? I lead armies, I'll have you know. I'm not concerned with matters that merely inconvenience you with the company of Gilderoy bloody Lockhart." He heard the sharp edges in his voice and hated the sound of them, while still feeling completely incapable of softening them out.
"Well first of all it isn't JUST Lockhart, and secondly, have you ever had to endure an attempted wooing from Gilderoy Lockhart? It's a sight worse than inconvenient. It's painful."
She was smiling. Apparently unperturbed by his shortness, she smiled at him like they were just having a laugh. She was a very strange person and he was fairly sure this was an act in case there was anyone watching. What was she really thinking?
He reminded himself that he didn't really care. He just wanted to be alone. The past six months had left him without an ounce of energy to care about the inner workings of a very strange story book princess.
"I'm terribly sorry Princess. And not all amused by your predicament and don't plan to watch you squirm." His voice dripped with sarcasm. He really didn't have the patience for this. "It's a pity that I can't help, seeing as we'd never be a believable match anyway. So… hurry along. Go find some other gentleman to be part of your nonsense."
He'd not had to deal with any sort of romantic propositions in quite some time, but he'd had plenty of experience in dissuading that sort of thing, back in his first few years at court. Now it was accepted fact that he was married to the concept of honor and chivalry. Chastity was a virtue that only the truest knights in stories could embody. He was a true knight and the King's man; like Sir Galahad to King Arthur. He would never marry.
Or that was what he liked for people to believe anyhow, and it was close enough to the truth. It just neglected to mention that it was all tied up in the issue of where he came from and who he wanted the world to think he was.
But regardless of his careful avoidances of romantic pursuits in the past, he'd never had to fend off anything quite like this. This was a princess, and also a madwoman. Why did it have to be now? He was in no shape to deal with any of this.
"I asked you because you're really the most believable person that came to mind."
He nearly stopped in his tracks. He was going to be on the block for regicide if James had gone loose lipped about Sirius being the erstwhile heir to a rather significant Duchy that had recently declared itself a sovereign state. He hated the thought of people… courtiers… his own men… forming judgements of his character based on the unfortunate circumstances of his birth. He'd gone through the trouble of earning a reputation as fine knight and a decent person and he was not going to have Walburga ruining all that too. He often wished the lie were true. James should have been his family.
But also James should bloody well be quiet. He really hoped he'd misunderstood the implications of what she'd said.
"You think people will believe an unlanded knight of illegitimate birth is a likely match for the heir to the throne?" He attempted to keep his voice steady and casual. Mostly he thought he sounded tired. Because he was tired. So so tired.
"I think we're the best looking people at court and it would be logical if not expected for us to pair off." She looked at him as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
Well that was not what he was expecting. It was… or it should have been… good news, since now he had no cause for murderous feelings towards the anointed King. But there was a large part of him that just wanted to scream at Princess Marlene to start behaving like a normal human being because this was beyond odd and he was bloody exhausted.
Who the hell says something like that? It wasn't… particularly inaccurate… at least with with regard to the Princess' own personal beauty, upon consideration. That didn't make it any less strange to hear out loud.
"Wow. Nice ego you've got there, Princess," was all he could manage as a retort. He felt ashamed of himself. A year ago he'd have never guessed that he'd be too tired to think of a really good barb, well before midnight and at only 22. It was a crying shame.
She rolled her eyes again, "You know that I'm right."
Was she? He had never gone to the trouble of considering how he'd place in a court-wide beauty contest. He looked… like his mother. She was beautiful and untouchable. He hated seeing her in the mirror, but he had to concede that he was glad she hadn't been evil and also a hideous toad. It was never really a bad thing when a very pretty (very strange) high born lady expressed a favorable opinion of his appearance. She certainly hadn't been the first, only the strangest.
"Thanks I guess?" The words sounded disgustingly genuine coming out. He'd lost his tenuous hold on his courtier mask. She really should have left him alone tonight. He would have been much more fun after a good night's rest.
He'd have probably been better looking as well, for that matter. He laughed at the absurdity of the whole thing. What difference did it make if he had no competition in that department according to Princess Marlene? What difference did it make in general?
"For what?" Her guard dropped for a split second, and Sirius saw the crease of soul in her face, but it was gone in an instant.
"You just said I'm the most attractive gentleman at court? Or has this all been a delirium induced dream?"
She laughed, a short sound that coming from anyone else would have been a snort, but she'd managed to make that more graceful somehow. She really defied all logic. Princess Marlene should not rightly have been a real person. But there she was. Rolling her extremely blue blue eyes at him, letting go of his arm in order to flail her unnaturally graceful arms about more dramatically. "Come off it. I wasn't paying you a compliment. Why do people have to be so tetchy about these matters? It's not as if you've never seen your own reflection."
"Well we can all be assured you've spent plenty of time staring into a looking glass," Another weak barb. He accompanied it with an attempt at a knowing smirk. He wasn't living up to his reputation for being charming and witty. But she had stuck around after he told her she'd best not, so it shouldn't have upset him if she thought he was rather less impressive than rumors suggested. Why was he upset?
Probably because he was still awake.
"I'm well aware of what I look like; I don't need to spend hours in front of a looking glass. And you have no reason to say no to my proposition. I've asked around and know that you're unattached. It's not as if you have to actually marry me or anything, I'd prefer you didn't actually. Just keep away the pests until Queen Lily produces an heir."
He had to gather up his reserves to finish this rather unwelcome melee that the Princess had insisted upon. He would need to perform a feint to make it work, but Sirius was, if nothing else, confident in his sparring abilities. He took a deep breath and dredged up every ounce of charm that he had left in his exhausted being. This was going to work.
"You know what? I take back what I said."
"So you'll help me?" He would have laughed at the hopeful look on her face, but he was too exhausted to do so without risking falling into a fit of laughter that circled back around to laughing at himself and what his life had become. It was better avoided, so he just shook his head.
"No not at all. I meant that I am going to really enjoy watching you squirm." Satisfied that he'd been the victor, he sped up his pace and headed off to his own chambers, in pursuit of a moment's peace.