This chapter contains a little hat tip to the AkuRoku shippers. I see you, dominating the KH ship community. I don't share your ship, but I see you. Keep killing it.
Also, the outfit Axel wears in this chapter is
blahzilla/art/Lea-Design-471993478
All credit goes to Blahzilla on Deviantart. Honestly, if Lea wears the damn coat all through KH3 and not an outfit like this, I'm gonna be hella pissed.
Chapter Text
XXIV.
"Time to wake up." Axel's voice is hot and heavy at my ear, which is, ironically, how my body feels. I think that I could literally melt into the bed.
"Or maybe you could just bang me and we could take a two hour nap afterward." I snuggle closer into him. He snickers, his breath tickling my neck as he draws away from me. I immediately steal the blankets from him and wrap myself tighter, trying to compensate for the sudden loss of his warmth.
"It's our day off." He tells me.
"Okay. You bang me and we take a three hour nap afterward." I suggest, pinching my eyes shut. Suddenly, I feel him leaning over me and I peak an eye open. He's got his hands on both sides of my head as he hovers over me. I heave a sigh and turn onto my back. Quickly, I lock my legs around his waist and pull him down into me. "Sleep. You can put it in my ass."
For a moment, Axel genuinely seems to think about this.
"You are something else." He shakes his head. "Are you really turning down a date for sleep and anal?"
"Wait, a date?" I ask. "Are you trying to take me on an actual date?"
"Well excuse me for trying to be a good boyfriend." He laughs.
"No, it's not that…it's just? Really? Like an actual date? Not just ice cream with Roxas and Xion?" I ask.
"Nope, I had a whole romantic day planned. The beach, watching the sunset, the whole nine." He admits, with a very sly grin on his face. I swipe a thumb across his cheek.
"You're taking me out on a date." I repeat. Because it doesn't feel real. It has only been 138 days since I arrived here, and even less than that since I told anyone with ears that he wasn't my boyfriend and I didn't want to be in any type of relationship with him. It feels so very strange to me that I only have memories of knowing him for a very short amount of time, because the longer I am with him, the more all-encompassing my feelings become—the more I cannot imagine a life without him.
"You can thank me later." He grins as he helps pull me out of bed.
"Why are you doing this?" I ask.
"Maybe I'm just being nice." He shrugs, and once we are both on our feet, he pulls me in close and places a kiss on my forehead.
"You have been incredibly nice lately." I agree. "But I know you. What did you do to piss me off that I don't already know about?"
"Have I told you that I hate how smart you are?" He asks, grabbing a handful of my ass.
"Many times." I nod. "Deflecting isn't helping your case though."
"Oh alright." He rolls his eyes, but kisses me once more for good measure. "I'm going to be gone a few days. On a solo mission."
"Okay, then I'm coming with you." I reply, because I'm not a part of this fucking Organization, and like hell if they think they can tell me what and what not to do. I'm helping out with missions because I'm a decent human being and I want my boyfriend to get his heart back, pronto.
"Well, here's the thing, sweetheart. Saix might've already explicitly forbade that." He rubs the back of his neck, hands finally off of me.
"Fuck Saix. And fuck Xemnas too for that matter. I do what I want." I remind him, but he just chuckles blithely, all cocky smiles. I know I'm getting nowhere with him now.
"That you do. But, there may or may not be a contingency upon me going alone." He confesses, brow knitting as he flashes me an apologetic smile. I go weak in the knees, but refuse to let it show.
"Would you care to share this contingency?" I cross my arms to my chest.
"Not especially. Hence the fact that I'm insisting on flying solo for this one, Rueks. But today is me making it up to you." He brushes a thumb over my lower lip, but I swat him away.
"Seriously? After everything you're going to keep hiding shit from me?" I snap.
"If it means keeping you safe, absolutely. I already told you this." He reminds me.
"Does this have something to do with the big secret you learned about me in Shibuya?" I ask.
"Rueki, can we not get into this?" He sighs.
"We can be fine, just fucking answer my question." I counter. He heaves a sigh.
"Fine. Yes. It has everything to do with it. I had to tell Xemnas and Saix when I handed in that paperwork for Oblivion. The secret, coupled with the leverage we have over Saix, kept you alive, got it memorized?" He taps my temple.
"So everyone knows about this big secret except for me?" I ask. "That's real fair."
"Not everyone knows, okay?" He groans, tearing away from me. He takes a moment and a deep breath and when his gaze finally meets mine again, he is infinitely more composed. "Saix and Xemnas had to know, I didn't want to tell anyone. But your life is what's most important to me, Rueki. And you knowing this secret? It wouldn't be good, I promise you."
"But why? What the hell would it change?" My hands ball into fists.
"Everything."
We stand there looking at each other, for lifetimes and for seconds. I hate that this isn't a battle that I'm going to win. I hate him at least a little bit right now. I hate that I can see us going round and round in circles with this same thing, and I have no idea how long I'll be in the dark on all of this. I hate that he is going away for a few days, so against my nature, against what my very being is shouting at me to do, I sigh in defeat, my shoulders slumping as I take a seat on the bed.
"Fine." I say. "Let's go to the beach, let's have a nice day off."
He instantly swoops down, on bended knee and takes my face into his hands.
"Thanks for not fighting me on this, sweetheart." He kisses my nose.
"You're just lucky you're cute." I say, pressing my lips to his. He meets me back with a simmering passion, taking me tenderly, but firmly into his arms as he maps out the contours of my face and my body.
"You wouldn't be the first person to tell me that." He grins stupidly at me as he finally pulls away.
"Oh, I don't doubt it."
After sufficiently dragging Axel through shops in Twilight Town — because this outfit is nice, I'm not letting sand ruin it, and I'm not going back to Shibuya any time soon— I'm now clad in a black bikini, a white crocheted top and a pair of denim shorts. He wears an orange and black vest of sorts, with a cowled hood and a slightly baggy pair of black joggers. I wasn't the one who told him to buy a pair of black, white and red boots with matching fingerless gloves, but I'm also not complaining even a little bit. Why is he so damn attractive? With the wave of his hand, we're going through a portal and to… an island?
"This is the Twilight Town beach?" It seems impossible, with the vibrant blue skies, palm trees, crystalline waters and white sand. When I think Twilight Town, I think mild, I think orange, I think sunsets and ice cream. Not the tropics.
"Nah, it's a weekend, that beach will be crowded with people. I didn't need a bunch of teenagers trying to cop a feel on my girl." He tosses an arm around me and meets me with a lazy smile.
"Fat chance on that." I snort.
"I thought this might be nicer, a little more private. No one technically lives on this Island. The kids from the sister islands will probably end up rowing over here on their boats at some point in time, but until then, we'll have this place all to ourselves." He tells me, placing a kiss on my temple.
"Where exactly are we?" I ask, wrapping my arm around his waist, leaning into him as I stare out into the ocean. He swore, vehemently that I wouldn't be getting him into the water today. That it's 'not my thing, got it memorized?' But I'm wondering how hard it would really be to convince him to swim with me. I've only been swimming a very small handful of times. Always in the pool at the rec center, on days where those who ran the orphanage thought we were getting too restless and couldn't figure out what to do with us. The water there was cloudy with chlorine, stunk and the room was filled only by the sounds of shrieking children.
"The Destiny Islands." He says and my knees buckle. He literally has to grab onto my beltloop to keep me on my feet. "Rueki…"
"Sora is from here." Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. My hand withdrawals from around Axel as I hide my face in both of my hands, trying to calm down the hyperventilation that is creeping up on me. This is going to be fine. Sora is safe, Naminé is fixing his memories. It isn't my fault that he is completely fucked up, I fought a couple battles with him, handed him some cards, but ultimately, even when I wanted to kill something, I didn't kill him. I told Sora to go back, I told him not to pursue Naminé, even when it went against everything anyone was telling me to do. I tried, I really tried, this isn't on me, I had no idea what would happen to him. I just needed to stay alive and—
"Rueki, babe." Axel tears my hands away from my face and takes them into his. He presses his forehead down against onto mine, suddenly the whole world is centered, the stars are aligned as they should be. My heart is still. "Do you want to go somewhere else?"
"No." I shake my head, finally sighing. I used to be so fucking normal. No random panic attacks, no nightmares, just a bad attitude and a foul mouth. Damn, do I miss those days.
"Fuck, I broke you, didn't I?" He breathes. I shake my head again as I draw in a breath.
"No, I'm just a little dented. We're good. This island is beautiful, I'm happy to be here with you." And I am, no matter what anxieties course through me. I'm the only one with control of my feelings, I'm the only one who can make the choice to enjoy this day, to enjoy a day off with him before he departs for Castle Oblivion. I reach out to touch his face and eagerly, I press my lips to his, trying to express to him just how okay I actually am.
"Rueki," He breathes as I finally pull away. "Are you sure you—" But I don't let him finish, because something tells me, whatever he was about to ask, he won't like the answer to. So I shove him, and with a laugh, dart out into the ocean, tossing my shirt over my head, kicking off my shoes and shimmying out of my shorts as I do. A deep blue wave slams into me and knocks me down onto my face at the shoreline. I've got a faceful of sand when I come up, and my ears are waterlogged, but the result is worth it. Axel is doubled over, on his knees in fits of laughter, quite literally wiping back tears. I don't even bother to try to wipe off my face. Instead, I cup some water in both hands and walk over to him, slowly, steadily. He looks up at me just in time for me to uncup my hands and spill water across his face.
He spits and sputters, wiping ocean water off his face as I try to wipe sand off of mine.
"Now that was playing dirty." He tells me. "I'm a fire elemental sweetheart." As though I don't already know.
"Right, Dancing Flames." I laugh. "Whatcha gonna do about it?" He answers by wrapping an arm around my waist and tackling me into the shoreline, my hair sprawled out beneath us, kissing the waves as he pins me to the ground, my wrists above my head. I wrap my legs around his waist, and just as quickly as he tackled me, I twist my hips and flip us over, my soaked, sandy hair hanging around us like a curtain.
"Now this is the view I came to the beach to see." He grins from below me, his eyes roaming my scantily clothed body.
"I'm not having sex on the beach." I say.
"No? I think it might be something we should check off of our fucket list." He wiggles his eyebrows. I snort.
"Fucket, like bucket list, but for fucking. You're really clever, babe." I roll my eyes. "Listen, I'm no expert when it comes to islands, but I'm willing to bet that sand will get into places that I never want to get sand in, if we bang it out here. Besides, it's not like we don't have a nice, comfy bed waiting for us at the castle."
"You need to learn to think outside of the box, sweetheart." He leans up, and I meet him half way, touching our noses together.
"You know, talking to me like that has definitely taken anal off the table." I wink. He just meets me with a smirk.
"Was it ever really on the table in the first place?" He asks.
"Touche." I laugh.
"Besides, I don't need you for that. Why do you think I became friends with Roxas?" He teases.
"Mmhmm, right." I nod. "That's not creepy at all. He's fourteen."
"You're fourteen." Is his really intelligent reply.
"Your mom is fourteen!" I giggle, and then chomp down on my lower lip, because that might've been my dumbest attempt at a joke, ever. Axel looks at me with raised eyebrows for an eternity before he bursts into a fit of laughter, his entire body shaking. I can't help it either, the laughter comes in fits until I collapse onto him, my head tucked on his chest as we cackle like idiots.
"Ew!" A high pitched voice squeals from behind us and I groan. It very obviously belongs to a teenage girl, who probably still isn't letting her boyfriend touch her boobs under the bra yet. I hoist myself up, stealing a skeptical glance at Axel, who looks equally annoyed that we have been interrupted in what has actually been a very silly, non sexual moment. "Get a room!" I turn to see a short, brunette girl in her early teens, with her hands on her hips.
"Don't you have better things to do than patrol the beach, little girl?" I ask. She huffs, eyes narrowing.
"I am not a little girl!" She insists, which somehow makes her seem that much younger.
"Whatever. How about you run along now." Axel says, sitting up from underneath me, his arms snaking around my waist.
"How about the two of you quit the public necking! No one wants to see that." She sticks her tongue out.
"Awe, that's so sweet. I'm so glad to be getting advice from a little girl who probably has to put munny in the swear jar every time she says 'crap'." I roll my eyes. Axel snorts.
"That was oddly specific." He snickers. "Listen, kid, we're just out here, trying to enjoy our day off. I'm sure you can find plenty more places to play."
"Nope." She says, popping her lips. "This is where I like to sit and watch the waves."
"I am going to fight this kid." I stage whisper to Axel, eyes still on the girl.
"No you're not, she's a child." He says, patting my back.
"According to you, so am I." I remind him. I go to stand up, but he tightens his hold on my waist, just as another kid comes onto the scene, this one with floppy blonde hair and bright eyes. I nearly choke. He looks so much like a younger version of Del that I have to do a double take. But no, Del has green eyes, not blue, and he couldn't catch a tan if I paid him to.
"Selphie, c'mon, Wakka wants to play Blitz Ball. Even with Kairi, we still need you to make an even four!" The boy tells her, and then looks to us. His eyes roam me in a way that I have only experienced a very small handful of times, and I swear, he nearly salivates. Guess I attract a certain type. "Oh, hi. I don't recognize you guys." He takes a step closer to us.
"Hey. I'm Axel. The cute one here is Rueki." For show, Axel slaps my ass and I color. Why? Why, why, why?
"I'm Tidus." Tidus is probably about ten shades deeper of a red than I am. Axel is grinning like some kind of devil, and I quickly realize exactly what he is doing. Oh this is so weird. Using the attraction this kid has to me, to get his way. "This is Selphie."
"I don't want to introduce myself to them." Selphie snorts. "I mean seriously, talk about having no class." She flips her hair.
"Oh go fuck yourself." I snort at the girl. She claps a hand over her mouth, so scandalized at my language.
"No manners! Seriously!" She throws her hands up and storms off.
"Um, sorry about her." Tidus rubs the back of his neck. "She's mad because neither Wakka nor I wanted to share a Paopu Fruit with her."
"A who-who fruit?" I ask.
"Paopu. Those star shaped fruits up in the trees. It's dumb, just some old legend. They say if two people share one, their destinies will be intertwined forever. No matter what happens, they'll be a part of each other's lives." He explains. "I mean, Selphie is cool, but she can be pretty annoying. I don't know if I want my destiny to be tied to hers forever. That's a long time."
"That it is." Axel nods. "Well, thanks kid, for getting rid of her for us."
"Oh um…yeah." Tidus says and his eyes are once again, on me. I shift, in Axel's arms.
"Well, uh, have fun with your game." I say. The boy colors and nods before he scampers off. The second he is out of our line of sight, Axel howls out a laugh.
"See, I told you. Times that by everyone in Twilight Town, I don't know I'd be able to keep everyone with a libido from trying to steal my girl." Axel teases, sucking a kiss onto my neck.
"Oh please. Even if they did manage to steal me, they'd return me within an hour. I'm annoying as hell." I remind him.
"That you are sweetheart." He starts to toy with my hair as I lean deeper into his arms.
"I'm kinda glad we ran into those two and not Kairi." I confess. "She's the girl Sora likes. It'd be weird, seeing someone who looks so much like Naminé. I mean, it's weird looking at Xion."
"Fuck, you're telling me!" Axel shakes his head. "Trust me, the way you reacted was exactly how I was feeling. I didn't want the kid to feel weird though, you know?"
"We're Nobodies, we don't feel at all. Meh." I say, in a very mocking voice. Axel grasps my face in his hands and tilts my head up, brushing our lips together. I cannot help the smile that spreads across my face.
"I don't sound like that." He insists.
"You do." I disagree. "But I'll forgive you if you come swimming with me."
And he does. He moans and whines and complains as he strips out of his clothes and down to his boxers before following me into the water. His hair falls flat but is still sticky with gel until I shove him under the water completely. He doesn't stay under long, instead, he swoops up, grabbing the tops of my thighs as he pushes us up onto the surface, me sitting on his shoulders. With absolutely zero care, he releases my legs and I fumble as I fall back into the ocean. I didn't realize how much fun it was to take turns attempting to drown your significant other. Before I know it, I'm crispy with an impending sunburn, and Axel and I are laying on our backs in the sand, eyes closed, holding hands.
"It's so hot here." I sigh.
"You know, you could always put your hair up." He reminds me.
"No I can't. You said in Shibuya, that it would only be a matter of time before I put my hair back up." I insist.
"And you took that as a challenge?" He asks. "You're impossible."
"You already knew that. Besides, are you telling me you wouldn't have done the same in my shoes?" I snort.
"You might be onto something." He agrees. "You just can't stand the though of letting me win, can you?"
"Nope."
"Have you ever been nice enough to let anyone win something?"
"I think once I pretended to have a twisted ankle so that Amaya wouldn't be 'it' anymore, in a game of tag." I confess.
"Well aren't you just ever so generous?" He laughs.
"You're trying to tell me you're any better?" I ask.
"Of course. I let you think you've won arguments all the time." He says.
"Ohohokay." I peak an eye open. His skin is slick with sweat and ocean water and I clench my thighs together, attempting to offer myself some relief. He is so perfect. So sexy and so delightfully snarky. "What made you choose this world anyway? Is it your favorite or something?"
"Hm? No. I don't think so. I just knew you grew up in a frozen tundra, I thought this might be a nice change of pace. You know, we don't exactly get a ton of days off. I figured, with what you and I have been through, we deserved a day together that was just…really damn amazing." He says. I sit up, curling a knee to my chest. He seems to sense me shifting, because he opens his eyes, grinning as he looks up at me.
"This really is amazing. I wish we could do stuff like this more often." I nod.
"When I get my heart back, Rueki. We'll make up for how hard we had to work." He squeezes my hand.
"Promise?" I ask.
"If you really think you can wait on me, then yeah, Rueks. I promise." He nods.
"You're dumb if you don't think I'll wait for you." I say. "I have sat through mediocrity my entire life, thinking that there was no one in any world that I could connect with, that Del and Amaya were the best I could do. I was really so worried that I was everything you accused me of being in Shibuya, selfish, condescending, uncaring, cold. And then you come into my life, and I wanted nothing to do with you, but I swear, I couldn't get you out of my mind. You had me wrapped around your finger from the very start, Axel. We might have had some shaky times, I might've told you in a fit of rage that I didn't want anything to do with you. But no matter what, I think I would've always found my way back to you. Even if we didn't go through hell. I have always been yours."
He lays there in silence, absorbing my words or trying to figure out what to say, I do not know.
"Do you think if our world never would've fallen to darkness, that things would've been the way they are now? You and me together?" He asks. I shrug.
"I dunno. You said I was an annoying kid that tried to harass you and Saix all the time, right?" I ask, he nods. "Then you probably would've just been annoyed as hell by me the entire time." I don't want to voice it, but maybe him losing his heart, maybe the worst thing to curse either of us, was the silver lining that brought us together.
"Or, maybe the second you hit puberty I would've started looking at you differently." He shrugs, wagging his eyebrows. I bark out a laugh.
"Omigod, you're what, five years older than me?" I ask. "You totally would've failed high school and ended up being a super senior. Which meant that I would've been the freshmen honor student assigned to tutor you. That could've been sexy. You know, after years of sexual tension and banter when I finally came of age."
"Oh please, I'm not an idiot. I wouldn't have failed. Maybe I would've worked my way through college and ended up being your boss at your first job." He says. I snort.
"Dude, you're not an idiot but you aren't motivated for shit. You'd have skipped class to get drunk in the woods or something." I accuse. He seems to ponder this for a minute.
"You know, you might know me better than I give you credit for."
"Not that it's been easy." I remind him.
"Nothing good ever is." He counters. I settle into his arms, which he opens up to me with ease. He pulls me in tight, and despite the heat of the island and the heat that he radiates, I find comfort in his touch. This might be the happiest I have ever been.
We lay like that for hours, talking, and I am utterly shocked at my how many words I can exchange with just one person. I'm even more shocked by the fact that the entire time he talks—recanting more stories from our childhood, stories about his missions with the Organization, and I tell him stories about growing up with Del and Amaya and how much I miss flying a Gummi Ship—I am actively listening, I am interested. I wait, with baited breath on his every word. I fall more and more in love with him with each passing second, helplessly so. Pathetically so. I suppose I don't mind so much.
"I'm going to ask you something." He finally says. We are now situated so that he is sitting up and I am sitting, between his legs. His arms are wrapped around me.
"I think you've asked me a lot of somethings." I say, tilting my head up.
"Yeah, but this is important, got it memorized?" He taps my skin. "You used to say something to me quite frequently. A feeling that you expressed. And only to me…"
"Oh." That I love him. "I mean, yeah, I…" Am not going to rub the fact that I can feel such strong emotions in his face. He heaves a sigh.
"Damn Rueks, I don't know how to do this smoothly. Is there a reason you don't say it anymore? I mean, have I so thoroughly fucked you up that you don't feel comfortable telling me how you feel now?" I shift over in his lap, and I'm on my knees, his face in my hands.
"What the hell, dude? No!" I shake my head, forehead pressed to his. "No, I just... felt so bad. In Shibuya, you told me you felt like shit when I said that to you, because you couldn't feel the same. I don't want to throw things in your face anymore, Axel. Not if this is going to work. This has to be you and me versus the world, not you versus me. You didn't choose not to have a heart. For fucks sake, I'm the reason you don't have one. How dare I say anything to make that emptiness any worse?"
"Rueks…" He murmurs, setting his hands on the small of my back.
"So, you were patient enough with me, letting me figure out my feelings. I mean, shit you're patient with me whenever I need to throw a temper tantrum, even now. I can at least be patient enough to wait to say it again, until you can say it back and mean it." I offer. "For now, we don't need to say anything at all."
"Nothing at all?" He raises an eyebrow. I shrug.
"Not a thing." I agree. He looks me over for a moment, eyes hard, brow furrowed. And then, abruptly, like flipping a switch, everything in his expression softens. For a moment, his sun rises and sets with me.
"How did I find you?" He breathes.
"How did we end up with such shit timing?" I mean it like nothing good comes for free, but he snickers and I can tell he's going to challenge me.
"How the hell did I find you when I don't have a heart?" He asks.
"How the hell did I crash land in your world?" I laugh. He laughs too and pulls me tighter into his arms.
"How did we get each other?" He asks, kissing the top of my head.
"I guess there had to be something good to come of all the shit." I reply. "Good luck getting rid of me now though, you're stuck with me."
"Maybe that was my goal all along." He teases. "Maybe I tricked you so that you'd be stuck with me."
"Maybe that isn't so bad." I say. He's quiet for a minute.
"So…that um. The Paopou Fruit thing that kid told us about." He scratches the back of his head.
"Yeah, how dumb." I snort.
"The dumbest." He agrees. "Hey Rueks? Nothing at all." It takes me a moment to realize what he's getting at, but when I do, I beam.
"Not a thing." I love you too.
We get back to The Castle That Never Was, with intentions of changing back into our normal clothes when Roxas intercepts us.
"Axel, Rueki!" The kid bounds over to us, looking lost and confused. "What happened to you two?"
"Nothing!" Axel says quickly. "We spent the entire day napping."
"What happened to your clothes?" Roxas scrunches up his face. I lift an eyebrow at Axel, because what is the sense in lying to this kid, our friend?
"These are pajamas." Axel waves his hand.
"You sleep in jean shorts?" Roxas asks me. I sigh.
"Yep, you caught me." I understand that Axel wants to act like a slacker so he gets stuck with fewer shit jobs, but jeez.
"Oh…okay." He nods, and like damn, I feel so bad lying to him. For how much he's grown, he's still a complete derp.
"Well, we've gotta get going." Axel says, without another word, he pats Roxas on the top of the head and yanks me into his room.
"Dude, what the fuck?" I ask, once we are safely behind closed doors.
"I don't need it getting around the Castle that I took you out for a romantic day." Axel says. I roll my eyes.
"Oh, is it an epic threat to your masculinity?" I snort. He offers me a strange sort of half smile that I cannot read.
"If only it were that simple." Is all he offers.
"Don't you think our lives would be a lot better if you just didn't keep secrets from me?" I ask.
"Probably. And one day I won't and all will be magical. That's what you want me to say, right?" He asks.
"It'd mean a lot more if you meant it."
With a quick change in wardrobe and enough time for Axel to gel his hair up—he's more high maintenance than me, I swear—we make our way to the clock tower where he assures me, Roxas is. He's not wrong.
"Huh, I guess you're right sometimes." I concede.
"Axel, Rueki!" Roxas beams at us. We take a seat beside him as Axel leans forward, eyes narrowed, gazing out into the town. A group of three kids, probably around the same age as Roxas, run around, laughing.
"Are the kids here on summer vacation already?" He asks, more to himself than to us. "Nah, can't be. It's much too early."
"Summer vacation? What's that?" Roxas asks, and it suddenly dawns on me that he was never a child, he never grew to be fourteen, he just was. Well, Sora grew, but Roxas didn't exactly have that same luxury. Or punishment, depending on how you look at coming of age.
"It's a dream come true, that's what." Axel says.
"Yeah, if you live somewhere that it actually gets warm." I snort.
"Oh come on, you get a whole month off! What's not to love?" Axel insists.
"A month off? I wouldn't know what to do with that much time." Roxas confesses. "I can't even figure out how to fill a day."
"You'd be surprised! They give you plenty of homework, and of course you have to play with your friends everyday. Trust me, it's over before you can even blink." Axel swears.
"Hmm, I could deal with seven days? Maybe." Roxas ponders.
"Most kids spend the time just goofing off with their friends." Axel explains. "They save the homework til the end and then help each other finish it."
"That sounds fun, I guess." Roxas shrugs. "What did you do then, Rueki, if you didn't have fun?"
"I dunno, I mean it's not like I didn't have fun. But Transmute City is kind of a hole." I roll my eyes. "Sometimes we'd go to the river and dare each other to jump in, until we'd all finally gotten pneumonia enough times. Sometimes we'd sneak into the library after hours and make forts out of books or steal junk food from the pantry in the orphanage and stay up late and eat a ton of it."
"Well to those of us that actually know how to have fun, it was a blast. Just getting to hang out with your friends is fun." Axel says and then, smiles a little softer, a little sadder. "I'd forgotten all that since becoming a Nobody." My heart drops. I reach out to squeeze his hand. I think for a moment about his life, about his past and how he has spent the previous decade without a heart. Most of his family, if they are alive wouldn't recognize him. He is clinging to friendship with an absolute sociopath, solely because of their past ties. He's stuck with a serious pain in the ass of a girlfriend. I wish I could grant him more days like today, I wish I could make him smile and remember how much heaven he truly deserves.
"So how'd you spend your day, kid?" I ask, and before he can answer, Xion shows up, a bright smile lighting her features.
"Hey guys!" She chirps, in her soft voice. "How did I know you'd be here." Roxas' entire being glows at her voice and I have to bite back a smile. These two are too damn cute.
"Where'd you go, Xion?" He asks.
"I didn't go anywhere." She shrugs. "What about you three? Did you go somewhere without me?"
"Axel and Rueki say they were asleep all day." Roxas rolls his eyes, which is just too adorable. Slow down with the tude, kid.
"There's sand in your hair." Xion says, looking at me, brow furrowed.
"I wouldn't worry about that." I wave my hand.
"I don't know, I don't believe you two just wasted a whole day off." She taps her chin.
"Unlike you two lazybones, we work hard. So we were tired, okay?" Axel insists.
"Unlike me and Roxas, maybe you're just out of shape!" Xion meets Axel with a big, goofy, teasing smile. For a moment, in my mind's eye, her face turns to Sora's and I could choke. That smile looks so right… But I blink and she looks just like Naminé again. How weird. But we all laugh like idiots, and Axel elbows me, like I'm supposed to be on his side. I stick my tongue out though and he leans in, kissing me right on the nose. Now I am the one who glows.
"Tomorrow it's back to work." I sigh, because I know what this means for me, for Axel.
"Yeah." Roxas sighs.
"Hope we get another vacation soon." Xion nods.
"Oh, yeah!" Axel's eyes light up. "I might not see you guys again for a while."
"Huh?" Roxas raises an eyebrow.
"They're sending me out on recon for a few days." Axel shrugs. I frown.
"Where?" Xion asks.
"Can't tell." Axel says and, I do swell with pride act the fact that he told me. Maybe despite all of his secrets, I really can't fault him, because maybe he does let me know more than he lets anyone else know.
"What's up with that?" Roxas makes a face.
"It's a secret mission." Axel puts a finger to his lips.
"But I thought we were friends!" Xion whines.
"Oh, angel face." I sigh. "I have been fighting that battle with him since day one, trust me, it's a losing one."
"Hey!" Axel admonishes. "I'm not about to tell you all my dark secrets. Got it memorized?"
"Dark secrets?" Roxas asks.
"Haha, I'm kidding." Axel says.
"He's not." I correct. Axel very pointedly ignores me, which is fine, because I know I'm being an asshole.
"I just gotta keep my mouth shut about it, or else Saix will get on my case. You know how he can get."
"Yeah." Roxas and I say in agreement. I turn to the boy with a crooked grin on my face. He meets me with an equally bright smile.
"Try not to bungle everything while I'm gone, huh?" Axel teases. I pinch him. "Dammit, Rueki, whatever happened to not abusing your significant other?" I just shrug.
"Meh." I shrug.
"Meh is right!" Xion teases.
"Damn, I can't count on you guys for anything?" Axel rolls his eyes, but a grin pulls at the edges of his lips, and I think how beautiful he looks like this. Happy, full of life.
"Hey!" Xion snaps. "We can handle things just fine!"
"That's right, just you watch." Roxas agrees.
"Exactly. If I can whip you into shape these two will be no problem." I nudge Axel.
We laugh and talk until the sun goes down completely. We return to the Castle, Xion and Roxas retreat to their rooms. Hand in hand, Axel and I walk through the Castle, trying to will the night not to end. Or at least, that's what I'm doing.
Saix intercepts us, I cringe. I watch even Axel make a face, which is new and makes me wonder what happened that he hasn't told me. Usually Axel is so blithe and unshakable, even in the face of the member of the Organization that scares me most.
"What took you so long?" Saix snaps.
"It's my vacation, I can take all the time I want." Axel says, just as briskly. "Since when do I have to check in with you?" Damn, I'm a little more turned on by my man than usual. You tell him, baby.
"You're letting yourself get too attached to them." Saix says, and I am not pleased with that statement.
"Fuck you, if you weren't such an absolute dick, maybe we'd be having ice cream on the clock tower with you instead." I want this to be cold, I want this to be cutting. Because for the first time, I think that Axel won't try to shut me up.
"You have been nothing but a blemish on this Organization since your arrival in this world." Saix seethes at me, before turning on Axel. "You know, you've changed."
Axel doesn't wait another moment, he makes a big show of pulling me in closer before he leads me right back to his room.
"Fuck him." He murmurs, under his breath. I think to ask what the sudden tension is all about, but without a second's hesitation, he puts me into the door, my face in his hands, his lips slammed against mine. I cannot breathe beneath his weight, but I don't mind, I'm dizzy and high, drunk on love, on him, on how he got an attitude with Saix and how he trusted me with secrets that Roxas and Xion weren't privileged to. In this moment, I want to take him back to the Destiny Islands and grab that Paopu fruit and offer him my entire future. Care tossed to the wind, I grab onto the back of his head and grind my hips into his. My fingernails slide down his back and my mouth moves to his neck, rough, violent and so very needy. He groans beneath my lips and I press my thighs together, turned on beyond compare. How the hell is this confident, manipulative, fun, sarcastic man all mine?
My hands move up, around his middle, up his chest as I push his suffocating form just slightly away enough that I can fiddle with the zipper of his robe as I kiss down his collar. Suddenly, his hands fly to my wrists and he pins me back against the door, breath heavy and warm, eyes intense and smoldering.
"Rueki, I need to not think right now." He tells me.
"You don't need to think about anything except my mouth wrapped around your cock." I bat my lashes and bite my lip in a way that I think is at least mildly sexy. I watch a smirk start to curl at the edges of his lip, like a sheet of paper lit on fire. I make a strangled noise as he presses his erection into me, he knows I'm absolutely gagging for it.
"Have I told you how perfect you are?" He asks, his thumb grazing my lower lip, sending shivers up my spine.
"Have I told you the same?" I ask, working his zipper the rest of the way down. I palm his erection, through his pants and once again, my lips are latched onto his neck, sucking and licking at his warm flesh. I take the soft skin and roll it beneath my teeth. Once more, I am so satisfied by how he groans, weak and wanton. "Today was perfect, you're perfect. You're the best thing that has ever happened to me." I breathe, and I'm laying it on thick, but there is something in my gut, telling me that what he needs right now is praise and I am all too happy to grant that to him. I slide my nails up his torso as I kiss down his shoulder, only to rake them back down with a little bit of force, scraping over his nipples, down that perfect 'v' of his abdomen. I feel his belly tighten beneath my touch as he chokes on his breath. Grinning against his skin, I work my lips back across his chest, his stomach, his hips, until I am met by the seam of his pants.
His hand slips back into my hair, his now ungloved hands moving across my scalp and I am emboldened. Bravely, I tug at the zipper of his pants down with my teeth, eyes flickering up to his. His nails start to bite me. I am alive only for this. My lipstick stains the button of his pants as I work them open, which is infinitely more difficult to work with than his zipper, but with a bit of a struggle, I get his pants undone and yank them and his boxers down with the quick jerk of my hands. His cock springs free, and as I lick a wide, flat band up the underside of his shaft, I swear, I can taste the salt of the ocean, the beach.
Greedily, I grab his hips. My lips enclose his cock and it disappears into my mouth. I hollow my cheeks and swirl my tongue up and down his shaft as I bob against him, my tongue brushing and dipping into the slit of his head until he is clutching my hair for dear life, making strangled cries and wanting, breathy sounds. I know him, I love him, and as my tongue maps out the familiarity of his cock, I find myself growing more and more turned on. I don't know who needs this more right now, me or him, but I feel beautiful, I feel alive.
Despite it all, I feel loved.
My eyes dart up to his, soft and sweet as the licking of a candle flame. With swollen lips, I descend, lower, lower, lower than I ever have before. I'm choking on him, my eyes start to water, but I can feel his cock twitching, dribbling precum inside of my mouth. He's close, I know, and I won't have to keep pace long. His eyes meet mine and I set my hand on top of his on my head, giving him the okay. I feel every single one of his muscles roll and uncurl beneath my touch as he slams my head down. My throat screams in protest, but I want this, more than anything, I want to do this for my lover. I steer into it, trying to hollow out the back of my throat as he fucks my mouth brutally, passionately. His hands bunch tightly in my hair as he pounds me down against him. The sensation is anything but pleasant, and that's okay, the depravity of it all has got me so close to the edge. I do my damndest to keep my lips curled over my teeth as saliva floods out of my mouth. It is like this, aggressively, buried in the wet heat of my mouth, that his orgasm shakes him. He twitches, jerks, smacking into the back of my throat again and again as he cums. With great effort, I swallow around him, and as he pulls away, his entire body is vibrating.
Before I can blink, he dips to the floor and grabs me into his arms, rolling so that he is on his back and I'm lying on my stomach on top of him. I lean up, a smile breaking out across my face—smeared red lipstick and all.
"Rueki…" The way he says my name makes me feel like the sun is shining for the first time in his world. And maybe that's what this is, him coming to terms with the fact that he can have something good in his life, even as a Nobody. He doesn't need to settle for asshole friends and sleeping the day away. He can smile and laugh, he deserves to. More than anyone else I know.
"You can say it, I'm amazing." I tease. But this time, his molten eyes do not harden. Instead, they are the softest, most inviting pools of emerald that I have ever seen.
"Yeah, you are." I shift on top of him, unsure of how to process such a pure compliment, such untainted, unconditional, albeit unspoken love.
"Nothing at all." I whisper, afraid that I will overuse this phrase, afraid of being so open with my love, afraid of the fact that it should be, for no intents and purposes, not reciprocated. The cynic in me is dead and buried. He has made me a believer.
"Not a thing." He breathes, running a hand back through my hair. "Let me show you how much." With quick work, he flips me over onto my back.
And he does show me, all night long.