Caroline and Lawrence sat outside in the garden, braving the cold for a private chat neither of them wanted.

"It was fairly agonising, but it was also interesting. She gave me some homework to do, and some suggestions as to how to help manage the grief when it hits." Caroline hated this, but knew she had to be brave before she could expect her son to be.

"Did it go okay for you? I don't need the details, that's between the two of you, but was it okay?" Caroline carefully kept her tone neutral, trying to be supportive.

"Yeah. I guess so. He gave me some homework too. Hard to keep it from Dad though."

"Can you find somewhere quiet to do it, like the library or in your bedroom?"

"I guess."

Caroline really wanted to put her hand on his back to offer her physical support, but wasn't sure what response she'd get, so kept her hands to herself.

"If he's not working out I'll find you someone else, but I'd really like you to keep going with this, Lawrence. I will too." She really hoped some professional guidance was going to help him. She could only imagine how much easier it would have been for her if she'd been able to do the same thing at his age. How different life might have been for her. She sighed. Perhaps there wouldn't have even been a John, but that would have meant no William and no Lawrence.

"Let me know if there is something you need from me. I do love you, and I really want the best for you."

"Yeah, I know." Lawrence got up and walked to the back door, more than ready for this to be over. He wasn't ready however, and not quite mature enough, to forgive her for moving so far away and making his life so much harder.

Caroline sat there for a moment longer, despondent about her son and their damaged relationship. If only it was as easy as the one she had with William. She brightened. He'd be arriving soon. She couldn't wait to see him. He was one of the few people she genuinely missed when they were apart.

Caroline sighed and followed Lawrence inside, thankful that at least the boiler had been serviced and the house was warm.

.

.

The lounge room was full of the family who'd come to celebrate William's 20th birthday. Lawrence was playing on his phone, Raff and his girlfriend Ellie were talking, and William was playing with Flora. Celia was boring everyone who would listen, but mostly Alan, about the latest play she was doing with the Halifax Players. She was playing Judith Bliss, a retired actor and star, and Celia had taken it upon herself to practice her persona at every opportunity. Two sherries under her belt and she was already in full flight. Caroline was hugely relieved she had the excuse of checking on the dinner and had escaped to the kitchen.

Caroline had nearly completed the dinner preparations when Gillian arrived with Calamity. After babysitting her granddaughter all day, it was a bit of a relief to hand her back to Calamity's parents who'd arrived just before her. Raff and Ellie would look after the bedtime routine for both girls before the adults ate. Gillian wandered through to the kitchen, finding the source of the delicious smells filtering through the house.

"Hiya. I've brought the apple crumble. Shall I pop it in the fridge?" She was rambling a bit with nerves.

"That would be great. Thank you." Caroline looked up, not able to hide the huge smile on her face that blossomed with Gillian's arrival. "Thank you for doing that. You didn't have to, but William will love it."

Caroline reached for the bottle and poured a glass of red wine for Gillian.

"Great. Thanks." Gillian sauntered around the table, trying to gather her thoughts. Knowing that she would see Caroline tonight still hadn't prepared her for the way her heart was pounding and her broad smile stayed glued to her face. Their hands touched when Caroline handed over the glass and both women stood still, barely breathing, trying to manage their own responses to the close proximity and the touch of the other.

The spell was broken when William stumbled into the room. They nearly jumped apart, Gillian sloshing the wine onto her hand and Caroline spinning to face the sink to hide.

"Do you need a hand," he asked?

"No thanks, darling. It's very sweet of you to ask, but this is your birthday so..." Caroline turned and clocked his face, which was almost desperate for a bit of quiet. "Actually, if you'd like to help..." she said, hunting around the kitchen for something he could do, "you could finish setting the table if you wish."

She looked at Gillian, almost apologetic, and definitely disappointed.

"Sure." William quietly looked from his mum to Gillian and back again, trying to work out the exchange he had witnessed. He moved quietly around the table, adding cutlery and cloth napkins, and the decorations he knew his mum liked.

"So William, tell us what's happening in Oxford this term? Are you liking your classes?" Caroline knew she could rely on William to step into the conversational gap while Gillian and she recovered.

"Professor Sumner is still as bad as my friends said he'd be, but I'm enjoying 18th Century Literature. Modern Writing is as obtuse as last term, but I'm getting my head around it, so I'm happy about that." William prattled on about some of the minutia of his course, noticing the looks being passed from Gillian to his mum and back again. Underneath the prattling, knowing he wasn't really being heard, he was busy interpreting the silent conversation that filled the room. It wasn't that he hadn't already worked it out, so much as he couldn't quite picture his mum and Gillian as partners. Obviously he didn't want to envisage his mum in bed with anyone, but Gillian was so very different, he was having trouble seeing the attraction. And yet, here it was, as clear as day to him in the looks and touches as they moved around the space together, getting dinner ready. He'd always been able to understand his mum, often better than she did.

It was only twenty minutes before the roast came out of the oven and William was asked if he wanted to carve it. "Good practice for you," was Caroline's instruction, as she served up the vegetables. The rest of the family brought the hubbub with them when they poured into the kitchen and dinner had officially begun.

.

.

"What do you mean you were in a car accident?" Caroline was nearly shouting and the colour had run from her face. All the conversations around the table stopped dead.

"It's okay Mum. It was just a prang. We were in the mountains when Angus hit some ice and we slid into the guard rail. Neither of us were hurt." Lawrence knew it was going to be an issue. His mum was always going to hit the roof and he'd been trying to keep it quiet. She had hearing like an owl and had caught the tail end of a conversation at the other end of the table.

"Well obviously he was driving too fast for the conditions. I don't want you driving with him again." Halfway between terror and the corresponding rage at Angus for nearly killing her son, Caroline was trying to control her rising fear. She knew it wasn't rational but the thought of Lawrence injured was overwhelming.

Gillian had quietly got up and moved around behind Caroline. She rested a hand on Caroline's shoulder. It had the immediate effect of calming Caroline, who dropped her head and closed her eyes while she took stock. Her son was safe. The accident hadn't hurt him. He was fine.

Lawrence didn't quite know if this was the best time to raise the issue, but with the silence at the other end of the table, he figured it might work. "I'd like to get my license too. I'm saving for a car. It would be much easier getting to and from work. Dad said he'd match my savings so I could get a safer car. You could always chip in and get me an even better one. Then I wouldn't need to get a lift with Angus," he said hopefully.

Caroline drew breath while she raised her head and stared at her son. "Really? You want to go into this. Now?"

Lawrence knew then that he'd made a tactical error. "Shit" he said quietly.

"Indeed. We can talk about this later." She stared at him, waiting for any more gems to fall from his lips.

After a few moments, it seemed like the crisis was over. Everyone started to relax and conversations started up again. Caroline placed her napkin on the table and rose to put the coffee on. A look passed between her and Gillian and she touched Gillian on the hip as she moved past her. It wasn't something either of them thought about and yet it was a clue to something going on between them.

William wasn't the only one who noticed. Seeing his mum move to support Caroline and Caroline's response, Raff was watching Gillian as intently as William was watching Caroline. The normally hawk-eye'd Celia, happy with sherry, had misinterpreted the lot and no one else had thought twice about it.

The two women moved around the kitchen, removing the plates and preparing dessert and coffee. They were so intent on each other that neither of them noticed that they were being carefully observed.

The coffee machine on, it was Gillian who quietly whispered "Farmer's brew?" into Caroline's ear, inspiring the thought of being shagged into oblivion and the resulting embarrassed flush and a coughing fit.

On her way to pick up the cups, as payback Caroline quietly whispered into Gillian's ear, "I had a tastier meal on this table last week." Gillian went beet red while Caroline smirked, trying not to laugh.

It was after this exchange that William noticed Raff was paying attention to the women too. He caught Raff's eye. They were going to have to chat about this. This was going to blow up if Celia found out. He nodded in the direction of the door and Raff quietly got up from the table and followed William out the door.

"What, was that!?" Raff was hopping around like he couldn't stand still. "Are they nuts?"

"I didn't know. Did you know?" William was looking around, making sure no one else could overhear them.

"No. No idea."

"First I've seen it, but then I'm away so I don't always know what's going on. Lawrence definitely doesn't know or he'd have called me, and I'm sure neither Granny or Alan know."

"Me and Ellie had no idea and I'm sure me Grandad doesn't know." He stopped to think about it. "It's not bad though. I like Caroline, and Mum's liked her for ages. Bitches about her, but I think underneath it me mum really likes her." He pauses, "Well, obviously." He sniggered. "God, I don't want to think about it. Me mum! A lesbian?"

"Yeah, it's a bit to take in. But my mum is a better lesbian than she ever was straight. She was so unhappy with Dad. And your mum's great. I really like her." William stops. "It's doing my head in a bit. They're so different."

"Can you imagine them fighting? Holy shit!" Raff cracked up. "It would be world war bloody three!"

William laughed, but it was a high-pitched, strangled version of one. "Terrifying. Avoid at all costs. Move counties. Seriously."

They both stood still for a moment, trying to get their heads around this new understanding of their mums.

It was William, his mother's son, who moved into strategic phase. "So what are we going to do about it? Do we tell them we know?"

"Yeah, I think we better. Me mum's going to need to talk to someone about it. I swear I'm going to need a ton of counselling, but it's better she talks to me than me Grandad."

"Mum probably won't, but I want to give her the option." William was thinking about the bigger problem; Celia.

"Will you keep in touch Raff? I'll give you my number; if Celia gets wind of this..." William was shaking his head, the fear of Celia's reaction a real and present danger. She really could split the family.

"Yeah. Will do. You call me if you hear anything too, yeah?"

"And if we need to talk, we talk to each other, not to the rest of the family."

"Okay. I'll talk to Ellie, but she won't tell anyone. She's good like that." Raff nodded.

"Done."

As they walked back inside, William wondered if his mum's shenanigans were going to turn his hair grey before he hit 21.