A/N: So this chapter contains some fireplay. I personally have never experimented with this kink, I researched it cuz Axel and Rueki deserve to enjoy themselves (since, you know, I torture them a lot). As is the case with any kink, especially such a dangerous one, I of course do not recommend engaging in anything unless you and your partner are being safe, doing the proper research and of course, not engaging unless the act is consensual. Anyhow, on with the fic.
XXXVII.
I have dreams of Sora's past. Of waking up in a world called 'Traverse Town'. Of meeting Donald and Goofy, of the Keyblade. I see these things because Roxas sees these things, because Sora sees these things.
And then, suddenly, after the rush of Sora's memories, I see Naminé, standing at the sealed room of my memories, assessing the cracks.
"It's going to consume you. The truth will destroy you. Are you ready?"
I jolt awake, gripping the sheets with white knuckles. Axel wakes up immediately following me, and on instinct, wraps his arms around me.
"It's okay sweetheart, it wasn't real." He could comfort me in his sleep at this point, and I wonder, briefly, if he is half asleep. "Go back to sleep, you've got a big day ahead of you tomorrow." I don't end up having a big day, but I listen to him and go through the motions with Hayner, Pence, Olette and Roxas, who do odd jobs to make money to go to the beach. A man in an Organization XIII coat brushes past Roxas and takes the money from him. By time he gets to Hayner, Pence and Olette, the man is gone, but I hear the words he spoke, clear as day.
"Can you feel, Sora?"
"It didn't look like Riku, it looked taller, had a deeper voice than the first time we ran into him. But I dunno, I guess the guy could've been Riku." I confess to Axel, though I cannot remember for the life of me when I met Riku, but something tells me, that I have, indeed, encountered him before. Axel and I have spent the evening trying to summon something called aTwilight Thorn. It appears to be an incredibly similar process to summoning Dusks, but requires a bit more energy. The way different mixes require different amounts of my energy to transmute.
"If Riku is working with DiZ, that's not a good sign." Axel shakes his head.
"Who is DiZ?" I ask. "I mean, I get that he was the one who trapped Roxas, but like, why? Why not just leave well enough alone?"
"Rueki, do you remember us finding the journal in the library in Castle Oblivion, the one the apprentices wrote?" He asks and I nod. "So you remember how the Organization was formed?"
"Yeah, the king or something of the world we're from was doing experiments with darkness, his apprentices went ham and all lost their hearts, which formed the original six." I recall.
"So you had it memorized?" He asks. "Good, so this will make sense to you. The ruler of our world? He's DiZ. I'm not exactly sure what happened, the world fell and he got the hell out of dodge. He's been underground for the most part, but after Castle Oblivion, he started causing a lot more trouble for us. That was part of why I was in Castle Oblivion for a month, the one time. Xemnas was convinced that DiZ was there, hiding in the basement, using our new territory as his lair."
"So the original ruler of our world, the one who experimented with darkness kidnapped Roxas?" I ask.
"Yeah, and now he's got one hell of a bone to pick with his former apprentices." Axel explains. "If Riku is working with him, that means Sora is DiZ's pet project. And that means our chance of getting to Roxas aren't looking so great."
"You realize that we're not getting him back, no matter what, right?" I ask. He frowns, his eyes hard.
"That's not an option, Rueks." He says.
"Neither is fucking getting him back. The worlds need Sora. Not just this one, but all of them. We need Sora to collect hearts and keep the balance in the worlds, can you imagine what will happen if Xemnas rules everything?" I ask.
"You're just willing to let Roxas go?" He asks me.
"You were the one that said yourself that he can't come back, it's not possible." I remind him. He heaves a sigh, shaking his head.
"But we've got to find a way! Maybe Xemnas doesn't have it right, but maybe you and I can figure something out!" He presses.
"Not if it means Sora doesn't wake up. I'm sorry if you disagree, but the world needs him, and we played a part in putting him to sleep. It's our turn to pay the price." I insist.
"I can't believe you're just okay letting Roxas be the sacrifice. Doesn't he get a say?" He snaps. I pale. I wish he did. I want him to have a say so bad but…Axel doesn't get it. Roxas wouldn't even remember us if we dragged him to the clock tower and forced him to eat ice cream.
"This isn't about getting a say, this is about right and wrong. It doesn't matter how we feel, this is right. Sora needs to wake up." I sigh, eyes darting down, because I know he's pissed. In my peripheral vision, I see his eyes narrow. He gets up out of our bed, I roll my eyes. "Come on, don't do that." I sigh.
"You've done this before…" He says. "You chose Sora over…" A look of confusion spreads across his face as I look up at him.
"What are you talking about?" He's making no sense whatsoever and he seems to realize this.
"I don't know…." He shakes his head. With a dramatic sigh, he turns around. "I need to go for a walk."
"Axel, don't." I plead. Everything else is falling apart, I need us not to be. I need us to be the pillar of stability that nothing else offers.
"I love you, but I need a minute, sweetheart." And with that, he strides out of the room. He doesn't return until after I am asleep, and I am out so early the following morning that we don't even exchange words. Instead, I tiptoe, noiselessly through the room, so not to stir him, and kiss his temple before departing to Twilight Town.
I not so coincidentally run into Roxas right outside of the Usual Spot. He hits me with an 'oof' and I literally fall onto my ass. Fuck, he's solid as all hell. I mean I knew he was taller and stronger than he was since he first joined the Organization, but nothing about him is a child anymore. Running into him felt like running into a brick wall. He towers over me as he lends a hand to help me up.
"Damn." I sigh. "Sorry, wasn't looking where I was going. I was just coming to find you, Hayner, Pence and Olette." I lie.
"No, I should've been paying attention. I didn't mean to knock you down like that." Roxas smiles softly at me as I stand up beside him. His tone is so not personable. In fact, he's regarding me much in the same way that someone would if they were trying to be polite to a complete stranger. Which, I guess I technically am to him, being that he's only known me for a total of two days in this universe. Still…
He might not know better, but I do. I've known him longer.
"You look like someone lit you on fire or something, kid." I grin. "You must be doing something fun."
"Yeah." He chuckles. "Hayner left me a note, saying that the five of us were going to the beach today, that he had the munny and everything taken care of, to meet him at the Station Plaza. I kind of assumed you knew and that I'd be seeing you there. He doesn't usually take to people as quick as he has to you. He must like you a lot." And there's not note of 'oh Hayner's got a crush' or anything like that, so the first reaction I have is annoyance. Of course he enjoys my company, I'm a fucking peach. But then, I realize…it's Hayner who wants me around. Maybe Pence, maybe Olette, but not Roxas. Maybe he doesn't hate the idea of me being around, but I am just not that important to him. He's not asking me to spend the day with him. He's not giving me hell for not meeting him at the clock tower for ice cream. I am not his best friend. I'm just some strange girl he chased down monsters with, an acquaintance at best. I feel sick. I'm thankful it's me and not Axel on this mission, because I cannot imagine how deeply this would hurt him. To have Roxas look him in the eye and barely acknowledge his existence? Not that it doesn't kill me but…
Fuck, I do care so much more about Axel's mental health than my own. When did I become such a sap?
"That's only because I was totally willing to kick Seifer's ass that day we found the photo thief." We, me and Roxas. Because I am one of his best friends, whether he remembers or not. Was this how Axel felt? Chasing me down through the Castle That Never Was, insisting he knew me? It feels as though so much of my time with Roxas parallels my time with Axel and forces me to see things from my lover's point of view. It would be annoying, if it wasn't so heart wrenching. This is when Olette and Pence stroll up to us.
"Hey." Roxas nods.
"Morning." Olette beams, and suddenly everything stops. Pence and Olette freeze mid walk. My eyes go wide, I look to Roxas, expecting him to be frozen too. Maybe this is an Organization XIII thing. Maybe they've sent in reinforcements. This seems like something that would be in Luxord's wheelhouse of capabilities. And yet, when my eyes meet Roxas', sea green finding deep blue, we realize, in tandem, with a feeling akin to an electric shock, that we are both immune to this.
"You're not frozen?" He asks.
"I was about to ask you the same thing, kid." I reply.
"Did you do this?" He asks. I snort.
"Yes. With all of my mystical powers. What do I look like, a fucking magician?" I ask. He rolls his eyes a little, and hey, at least this Roxas is a hell of a lot better at understanding sarcasm. He takes a step to approach Pence and Olette. I grab his arm.
"Hey." He snaps.
"Piss off, something's wrong, I'm trying to keep you safe. You don't know if they've been cursed or something." I snap right back at him, when suddenly, footsteps cut through our tension. With my hand still wrapped around his arm, a slight figure with wispy blonde hair, wearing a white frock, appears.
"Oh." Her eyes go wide as she catches sight of me. Clearly, I am not part of her grand plan. She chews her lower lip and looks to Roxas, her brow knitting together. "Hello, Roxas."
"Uh…hi…and you are?" He asks. Naminé's eyes dart to mine. Oh fuck, I can't let on that I know her, this would colossally blow my cover. From where I stand, behind Roxas, I shake my head, praying that she gets the hint. I don't know if my empathy link would work on her, though I assume not, so I don't even try pushing my thoughts into her mind. Naminé seems to grow mildly less anxious, upon finding out I'm being inconspicuous. I realize right then and there, she is working with DiZ. It makes so much sense. Why she is restoring Sora's memories, why she interfered and connected me to the Keybearer, why she is here right now with Roxas and I. And now that she knows I am not here to drag Roxas back, kicking and screaming, no matter what the cost, I see her posture soften.
"I wanted to meet you, at least once." She smiles sweetly at him, in a way that makes my heart skip a beat. Though whether it is mine or Roxas' non heart, I do not know. This might be some weird empathy link type thing. But she looks so sweet and so sincere, and so mysterious. Even though I know her, I hang on her every word. I like Naminé, it wouldn't be a lie to say I have missed her. Truly, catching up with her wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. And the Organization will be expecting me to test Roxas with the Twilight Thorn…
"Me?" Roxas asks. Remember how I said he was understanding things like sarcasm better? Apparently I was wrong and he's still a complete derp.
"Yes, you." The witch giggles. She offers me an unreadable look before she turns around and strides off, time unfreezing as she leaves our line of sight.
"Olette dragged me along to go shopping." Pence whines, as though this is some sort of great torture and shit, I nearly forgot he and Olette were there in the first place. I choke a little as I drop Roxas' arm. He flushes. Olette and Pence exchange conspiratorial looks. She bites back a giggle. Oh come on.
"Hey, you wanna come with us?" Olette asks and I hear the very obvious implications in her tone. This is not a double date, and I was holding his arm, not his hand. Though I am certainly flattered that she thinks I look young enough for this to be legal.
"Um…uh…wait…" Is Roxas' very intelligent response.
"Oh man, we're actually heading over to my aunt's!" I sigh. "I'm staying with her this summer, she lives not too far past the Sandlot. I just wanted to run back and grab my swimsuit before all five of us head to the beach." I swear, I'm not a fantastic liar, but I'm a much quicker thinker than Roxas. Axel has severely rubbed off on me. I think of how we disagreed last night on the state of things with Roxas. It didn't feel like a fight the way we used to have, and although I am perfectly content not throwing things at him…
I think I miss him even more right now.
"Oh, um…okay!" Pence is smirking from ear to ear, and dammit all, if I have to hear that a rumor got spread about me and Roxas sneaking off to my aunt's house to make out, I might stick my head in a blender. Or just take whatever punishment Saix wants to dish in order for me to never have to come back here.
"See you guys later." Olette giggles as they make their way past us. Once they are sufficiently out of earshot, Roxas breathes a sigh of relief.
"Thanks." He says. I smirk a little.
"Really kid, you've got to get a lot more creative than 'um, uh, wait'." I insist, bumping my hip against his. He pouts a little, but seems a lot more like the Roxas I know and adore than he did before.
"I don't like lying to my friends." He insists. My heart shatters.
"I feel that." I nod.
"We should go after that girl, where did she go?" He asks me, and of course he's focused on Naminé. That is the kind of tunnel vision only Sora's Nobody is capable of. Just like he was so focused on saving… On saving…
I don't remember.
"The Old Mansion, if I had to guess." I say, because that's the only place I've ever run into her before. I wish I could call Survivor to me. Something about seeing her has me anxious, wondering if I will have to face a difficult attack. It's not as though I couldn't summon the Dusks to my side to finish anyone off for me. It's not as though…
Damn, this isn't good, the pull of the dark magic is quite strong and I have to roll my shoulders back to suppress the urge. Roxas nods at me as I think of how lovely a release it will be to sick the Twilight Thorn on him. How incredibly fucked.
Not that he won't defeat it, I have no doubt about that. He's strong and has saved my ass on more than one occasion, this Nobody will be nothing to him.
We get as far as the Tram Common before we even catch sight of Naminé. She's on her way through the hole that leads to the woods, and it is right then and there, that I realize how bad it could be if Roxas confronts Naminé. What's he gonna do, sit there and demand an answer to why weird things have been happening to him these past few days? And more importantly, what is he going to ask of me if we do make it to her, surely the witch will not be the only one he has questions for. Now, using my mind and not just relying on instinct, I realize that I am quite fucked…Unless… I snap my fingers, several Dusks appear in front of us and the sensation almost brings me to my knees. Oh, fuck yes. That's the spot. Roxas takes this sudden stumbling as me being scared though, which is fine, the last thing I want is him suspecting me.
"Let us go!" He snaps at the Nobodies. He grabs my hand and takes off, back toward the Sandlot. I'm faster than him, and I am the one controlling the Dusks, but I let him have this moment, mostly because I'm enjoying every second of the protective urge he is having. It feels, briefly, like I have my best friend back. We get to the Sandlot though and I instantly regret allowing Roxas this. Captain Crop Top and his three lackeys are hanging out, talking shit or whatever it is entitled teenagers do. Seifer's eyes flick up, to where my hand meets Roxas'. I roll my eyes and pull my hand away, using that hand to flip him off. Seifer's eyes narrow.
"Chicken Wuss, Loudmouth." He greets us, which I suppose is better than Saix calling me a whore. At least Loudmouth is accurate. The Dusks chase after us, and I roll my eyes.
'…we are here to serve, mistress…"
'…yes, must serve…'
'…what does mistress need of us…'
Their voice ring in my head, but don't appear to be audible to Roxas or anyone else, so that's at least something. Musclehead's eyes widen at the sight. The girl's visible eye narrows.
"Who's that?" She regards the Dusks. Not 'what's that', which I find weird.
"I dunno, but they've already crossed the line! Find a weapon!" Seifer orders, and even Roxas follows his words. The idiot brigade takes defensive stances that once again, I pick apart in my head and Roxas grabs a bat. His eyes fly to me, and in that gaze is a request, imploring me to defend myself. A Dusk comes sailing at him and he quickly blocks it. I kick one and it doesn't do any sort of substantial damage, but it gets Roxas' eyes off of me for a second. He slashes to no avail and then looks to me, pleadingly. I offer a shrug, like I'm struggling just as hard. He turns to Seifer and his group, as do I, and I am shocked to see that they are frozen. Is this Naminé's doing again?
"This isn't good…" Roxas whispers.
"I'm inclined to agree." I say, and part of me thinks it's time to call the Dusks off. But then, suddenly, a voice rings through the air, high and clear, like a windchime.
"Roxas, use the Keyblade!" Naminé stands on a building, overlooking the Sandlot. Her eyes dart from Roxas to me. A Dusk comes flying at Roxas again and I don't know what I'm thinking. I snap my fingers, he goes to block the attack with his hands and suddenly, he's gone. My heart lurches, as though I am being yanked by a rope. I'm not sure if this is because Roxas is now somewhere else, or if it's because I'm afraid or he is, but I know, without a doubt, this is the pull of the empathy link—like he is desperately clinging to my hand. I clutch my chest, trying to visualize him in my mind's eye. Where the hell is he?
And yet, I realize quickly, he's still here. Not physically, but he's within Sora's heart, exploring the territory, ridding it of darkness. This is where he will fight the Twilight Thorn. I see him, in my minds eye, standing on a platform, with a door in front of him.
"Be careful." I warn. He seems to know I'm speaking but doesn't recognize my voice for whatever reason. "Beyond that door lies a completely different world. But don't be afraid. And don't stop walking." He nods. Don't stop moving, my friend, don't stop fighting. Time to send in the Twilight Thorn.
I come to reality as the Nobody materializes in front of Roxas and I suck in a breath, desperately. I'm not sure how I was able to push the empathy link that aggressively where I could transport Roxas inside of Sora, but the power is baffling. My eyes dart around—Seifer and his gang are still frozen, but Naminé isn't. She's down from the building though and on her way to me.
"Naminé." I greet her and her blue eyes light up. She no longer flinches when I say her name. Instead, there's a soft confidence in her. The orange lighting hits her and she glows.
"Hello, Rueki." Her brow knits together as though she isn't quite sure what to make of me. "Did you just summon a Twilight Thorn?"
"Yeah, Axel's been teaching me how." I say.
"I didn't realize…Oh." Her eyes go wide. She holds a finger up as though she is searching for something far off. She chews at her lower lip. "I'm sorry. You still don't know, do you? I thought for a minute, but…it doesn't appear so." She is scanning my memories, I realize. Browsing through them the way one might look for a part to reread in an old book.
"You know what would really fuck with Organization XIII? Telling me this secret thing I'm not supposed to know." I inform her. She cracks a sad little half smile.
"Yes, I suppose so." She agrees. "Still, Axel did allow me to escape, to make sure Sora didn't get hurt any further. I feel like it might be unkind to go against his wishes and tell you."
"Wait, so this all goes back to 'the secret to end all secrets'?" As I have not so affectionately dubbed it in my head. "I thought Axel said he didn't know this secret until after we left Oblivion." I groan. Naminé shrugs.
"He might not have believed it until after you left, but I did put the idea in his head. I was the first person to tell him." She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear.
"We're together, you know. It's good. I know I told you in Oblivion that love kind of sucked. But it doesn't. He and I are actually…" How do I say that he is the only beautiful thing in my life? The only thing I am certain I can count on. The most unpredictable person I know is the only one I trust with my life. Naminé seems to understand, probably from her brief probing of my memories. She nods.
"Yes, I see." She says. "I am sorry, by the way. About the empathy link causing you nightmares. I didn't mean for it to. I just…I knew that you would know what to do when you understood the truth." She says, and she's right, I can't even fault her for this. Maybe this has been my role the entire time. Twilight knows I have never been the nurturer or the hero but perhaps I am the guardian. The watcher over Del and Amaya's livelihood, over Axel's plans and dreams, over Roxas' safety and smile. Over Sora's very being. I don't want to do anything I have been tasked with, but at the end of it all, I have the conscience to know what is right. And no matter how deeply it wounds me, I will do it. Naminé had the right idea, I suppose, setting this onto my shoulders. I look at her and I only see a quiet innocence, the victim, the girl that the Organization held captive and forced to toy with Sora's memories, but maybe Axel is right. Maybe, despite the cute little face, she's scheming twice as hard as he is. And if so, whatever, that's fine. I guess at this point, I'm just used to being used. So at least if it is for a good cause, that's something.
"No, you were right." I frown. "Whatever it takes, Sora is going to wake up in a few days." Naminé tilts her head gently to the side.
"Yes. If our efforts go as planned, that is correct." She says. "You've been remembering things, since the last time I saw you. About your past." I don't understand why this is especially relevant, but it appears that once again, we are on the same side, so I suppose, if she can give me some insight or expose more memories, I wouldn't be opposed. After calling Axel, Lea, the memories have stopped flooding into my mind while I dream. Instead, the empathy link has asserted itself, the exchange of memories between Roxas and Sora taking precedence over any of my memories.
"A little." I confess. "I remembered something about the man who raised me, just a little memory where the two of us talked about how my parents died."
"And Axel too, you remember him from your past." Naminé says and jeez, I hate that she can do it.
"Honestly, why do you even ask me questions when you can see straight into my mind anyway?" I sigh. She offers a little smile.
"I can't read your mind, Rueki, just your memories. Whatever you're thinking right now, I won't know until it is filed away in your memory." Right now, I am thinking that this is annoying as hell and that Roxas better hurry up and beat the damn Twilight Thorn, because I would very much like to get back to Axel as soon as humanly possible.
"Mmm, good to know." I roll my eyes. "You're the one who said it was dangerous for me to start remembering. That there was too much darkness in the sealed room of my memories."
"There is." She replies, and then, with a downcast look, sighs, looking infinitely more like the Naminé I recall from Castle Oblivion. "But I'm afraid it's past that point, Rueki. You've only dove further and further into the darkness. Now, there is no matter of if the sealed room will burst open, but when." She explains.
"But why is it sealed in the first place?" I ask. She smiles sadly.
"The more I travel through your memories, the clearer it becomes. At first, I didn't understand why either. But it seems as though this was your body's natural defense to everything that happened when your home world fell." She explains.
"Hollow Bastion." Though I'm certain she already knows I know. Damn not so psychic powers.
"Yes. Your young mind was unable to process the sheer trauma of what you had been through. So your mind sealed off all of the darkness, all of the pain. You were given what so few are, a fresh start, an utterly clean slate." And something else that she isn't telling me, that no one will tell me.
"Is that why I didn't feel anything before I came here?" I ask. "Why Del thought I was so cold? Were my emotions hiding and when I met Axel, he broke the seal and tapped into everything my mind had been trying to forget?" It would only make sense, if I was convinced that I lost all of my friends and family, that my world disappeared in a flush of darkness, why would my innocent heart not be able to tell the difference between pain and pleasure? Why would my mind not choose to cut off supply to all emotions, in order to not risk a breakdown? Certainly, it would explain why I've been such a hot mess this entire year. Naminé offers me a bleak look.
"I'm afraid I don't think that is the case." She offers and I frown. Well fuck, apparently I'm a mess all on my own. Cool.
"You seemed so worried when we met in the old mansion that the darkness in the sealed room was going to be the end of me." I remind her. My stomach drops as her expression falls. For someone without a heart, she is miserable at hiding the things she is not supposed to feel. "I'm going to die." I predict. She shakes her head.
"No." She says. "At least, not from this. I can't predict what will happen otherwise. I can't see into the future." She reminds me. Little fucking sarcastic bitch.
"But something terrible is going to happen to me." I sigh.
"I think…if you think about it like that, of course. Something terrible can always happen. All of our stories are meant to end, Rueki. No one is exempt from that." She says, which doesn't exactly make me feel better. "With Roxas, you understand that the truth isn't setting him free, correct?"
"Yeah, the truth is shit." The truth, that he ran away from the Organization because…
Because…
I can't remember. Huh. Weird. Something about wanting answers? A delightful numbness presses those memories away and I relax into it.
"The same holds true for you, Rueki." She says.
"You know everyone's been telling me that for a long ass time now. Doesn't get any less annoying, no matter who says it." I remind her.
"Except Axel." She smirks a little. Is she teasing me? Really? I laugh a little.
"No, I hate it most when he does it." I giggle. Suddenly, her eyes go wide.
"Roxas should not see you talk to me." She chokes out. "He defeated the Twilight Thorn, he'll be back soon." I raise an eyebrow, thinking for a second, but realize that she is right. His strange new friend from Twilight Town should have no connection to this witch, begging him to use the Keyblade.
"Right." I agree.
"Open a portal, go home, Rueki." She pleads. I scrunch up my face.
"Dude, I can't open a portal." In the scatterbrained state she's in, Naminé must've forgotten. Her eyes go dangerously wide as she looks at me.
"Yes. Of course, sorry." She sputters. She must be hella anxious about meeting Roxas. Then, I realize, of course she is. They've never met before, she's Kairi's Nobody, he is Sora's, there's got to be a connection there of some sorts. She waves her hand and opens up a portal. I head through it only to be greeted by the rainy streets of The World That Never Was. Really? She couldn't have put me inside the castle?
I'm utterly waterlogged by time I stomp into the castle, my too short shorts superglued to my ass. I'm trying to pull them out when Saix stops me.
"Status report." He says.
"Go fuck yourself." I say. We stand there in icy silence as I wring my hair dry. I roll my eyes because he doesn't seem to take the hint. "Roxas doesn't remember me. Still. He kicked the Twilight Thorn's ass, so good job there. He's strong, he's not going to just go down thanks to some lesser Nobody, I'm not going to be able to just drag his unconscious ass from a fight and bring him back here." I say. Saix narrows his eyes further at me.
"Are you certain that your efforts are not just so miniscule that you aren't making a dent? Perhaps a bit of trying would make a world of a difference." He snarks.
"Trying my ass." I roll my eyes. "What do you expect me to do? I can't suddenly perform miracles."
"I suppose I simply expected for you to behave as standard. You seem to think the appropriate response to solving your troubles is lying on your back, I only assumed you'd feel the same when it comes to saving your supposed best friend." Saix taunts. I swear to fuck…
"You know, the whore jokes aren't funny anymore. I know you don't have a sense of humor for shit, I hear you can buy them from Moogles pretty cheap, though." I sass him right back. "And by the way, the only person I've fucked in this castle is Axel, and sorry that you're jealous. I didn't think it would cause tension, what with you having Xemnas' dick constantly jammed in your ass."
He stares at me, eyes utterly void of emotion, with only the faintest hint of disgust on his features, as though my very presence makes him mildly sick.
"Perhaps one day you might discover some manners." He rolls his eyes.
"Not likely." I say. He sighs and turns around, stomping off.
"Your efforts to retrieve Roxas are utterly useless. A member will be joining you tomorrow. Any requests?" He asks, which I'm sure is a question from Xemnas, not him.
"Demyx." Not Axel, not Axel, not Axel. It's already hellacious enough, me enduring having to look Roxas in the eye while he stares blankly at me. It shatters my heart further with every single word I say to him, and I'm the one who has already come to terms with the fact that no matter what, he must merge with Sora. Axel doesn't deserve this pain.
"Ha." Saix scoffs before he disappears from earshot.
I heave a sigh, making my way into mine and Axel's room. He's lying in bed, arms folded beneath his head, which he tilts at my arrival. I can tell he doesn't expect me. His eyes go wide and he sits up.
"You're back." He breathes. "How?"
"Naminé opened up a portal for me. Right into the middle of the fucking city. In case you were wondering, it's still raining out there." I offer him a little half smile. He climbs out of bed and strides over, wrapping his arms so tightly around me that I swear, steam radiates off of me.
"I'm sorry about yesterday night." He sighs.
"Don't." I shake my head, my hands finding their way to his back. I pull him in even tighter, inhaling into his scent.
"I don't have a plan, Rueki. For the first time, I have no idea what the hell I'm supposed to do. And I don't like what Xemnas wants to do, but I don't like what you want to do either and…it just fucking sucks. I just want the good times back, the three of us, laughing at stupid stuff, watching the sunset like nothing else matters." He sighs, weaving a hand through my wet, matted hair.
"I don't like any of this either." I confess. "It's absolute shit. Roxas has no idea who I am. He looks at me and it's all blank. He smiles and laughs with other people and treats me like I'm just some random stranger. It doesn't feel like I'm getting my friend back, it feels like I'm lost in my own life." He's silent for a minute as he kisses the top of my hair.
"Wanna shower?" He asks, and I nod against him. He scoops me up into his arms and I wrap my legs around his waist, savoring the feeling of being close to him. Him, the one thing in my life that isn't falling apart. He sets me down on the ground as we arrive in the bathroom. I shut the door behind us and pull towels out of the cupboard while he starts up the shower. I hear the sound of his coat falling to the floor, just before I feel him behind me, his arms tight around my waist, his lips at my shoulder. "Are you gonna be okay, baby?" I dissolve into the heat that he radiates. His fingers move nimbly, dancing across my skin, to the zipper in the back of my shirt. I let him slide it down and don't make an effort to catch my top as it hits the floor.
"I'm okay right now." I murmur as his hands leave my body. The sudden loss of warmth makes me shiver, and it doesn't help that I start working my way out of my shorts and shoes. I hear the rustling of him undoing his deliciously tight pants, hear the telltale signs of him slipping off his gloves. By time I'm completely undressed, I turn around and see that he is as well. And damn, I drink in the sight of him like it's the first time, every time. I reach out, my hands grazing the tight muscles of his chest. He shivers beneath my touch and I think that to him, I must feel icy cold. His eyes meet mine as he takes my face into his hands.
"Only okay?" He raises an eyebrow, a smirk playing at the edge of his features. My heart flutters, he's always beautiful, but there's something so attractive about watching his expression morph into something that isn't exhaustion or misery. I roll my shoulders back as his mouth moves to my neck, latching onto the area right below my jaw line. The wet heat sends a jolt through my limbs, I sigh. This is infinitely better than dark magic.
"At the moment." I grin, while he sucks the sensitive skin of my neck, teeth nipping and leaving marks in their wake. I know that's going to be a pain to cover up tomorrow, but in this moment, I don't care.
"You're really going to make me work for this, aren't you, sweetheart?" He asks, his teeth brushing my collar bone. The sound of me gasping fills the room and echoes. I feel him smirk.
"The water is running." I struggle to form a coherent response as Axel's hand comes up to tease one of my nipples. He snickers, his head popping up so that he can rest his forehead against mine. I am utterly overwhelmed by how intent his gaze is, as it meets mine. He pinches my nipple and I fail to hide my reaction. My toes curl, my lips part, my eyes are hazy with lust. I don't think I've ever seen him look so proud.
"Is that really what you're worried about?" He asks. His hand wanders to my other breast, I bite my lip.
"We're gonna run out of hot water." I whimper. He drags his fingernails down my abdomen, I watch him with baited breath. His hand dips, right between my legs, and for a moment, he palms my cunt, pressing the heel of his hand to my clit. But only for a moment and then he tears his hand away. My eyes flash, he grins.
"Can't run out of hot water." He shrugs, offering me a wink as he disappears into the shower. Fucking asshole. I chase after him, nearly slipping as my damp skin meets the tile floor. I throw open the door to the shower and throw myself at Axel. He catches me, easily in his arms, lips meeting mine, hungrily. With one hand, he reaches past me and shuts the shower door, trapping us in the heat that is almost overwhelming. I take a breath and feel hazy, almost intoxicated. He leans forward, into me and pivots, pressing my back against the wall. I pull away from him, face mashed into the wall, but this certainly doesn't deter him. Instead, he reaches down, his hand crawling up the inside of my thighs. I sigh, feeling his fingertips brush the lips of my pussy. The heat relaxes me, uncurls all of my muscles, soothes me as I melt into his hand. He teases me, swiping his index finger across my slit. Collecting my wetness on his fingertip, he slides, up, toward my clit. He works in circles, teasing everywhere except that deliciously sensitive nub. I tense, trying to find something to clutch in the shower, but am met only by smooth, porcelain walls.
"Axel." I beg. He snickers, kissing my neck. I feel teeth and cry out, my hands finding purchase on his back. My nails dig in, and I swear, he sighs.
"Fuck baby, claw me up, let me know I'm doing my job right." He encourages. Damn him, how the hell is he this incredibly sexy?
Water pounds behind us, but I have nearly forgotten it, as Axel's fingertips brush my clit, ever so slightly, ever so tantalizingly. It's a barely there sensation that shoots jolts up my body. I squirm, beneath him, arching my back, bucking my hips. His thumb swipes, pressing gently, strategically against my clit while he dips a finger inside of me. He wiggles it, in a 'come hither' gesture, as though he is pulling a trigger. Just as he requested, my nails bite into his back. The muscles in my belly twitch as I try to press myself impossibly closer to him. I need more. More everything. His free hand starts working down my back, fingers dancing nimbly down my spine. Suddenly, the most delightful sensation tickles my back, hot, vibrant, intense. Something laps at my skin that makes me choke on my breath.
"Good?" He asks, eyes finding mine. I nod, stiffly.
"Very." I sputter. He grins like a wolf as his hand continues down my back, that same brilliant tingle only second to the feeling of another finger pushing into my cunt. I whine, lavishing the fullness as he pumps into me, furiously, desperately. My muscles tense, my release building inside of me. His fingers and that beautiful tingling sensation brush the skin at the curve of my waist, teasing up my abdomen, to my breasts. He draws away only so that he can get a better angle on playing with me. My eyes go wide as I see flames lap at my skin beneath me. And to my surprise, it doesn't hurt at all. No, this is that exhilarating tickle. "Fuck." I choke.
"Don't be scared, sweetheart." He urges.
"I'm not." And I so am not. In fact, I'm fascinated, turned on beyond compare. I could watch him do this to my body all day and orgasm from the sensation alone. But I don't have to. Instead, I jerk as his fingers fuck me at a speed that I can only describe as brutal. I think I'm going to fall apart. Everything is too much and just enough all at the same time, the most beautiful sensory overload I can imagine. I tremble as the feelings shake my core, and I come, screaming his name as I clench around his fingers. I'm coming down, drawing shaky breaths of too hot air. Somehow, this amps me up even further. My heart starts to hammer, these shallow breaths get me straight up high. I don't know whether it's the arousal, the experimentation with fireplay or the man standing in front of me, but I only feel infinitely more energized. "More." I beg him, desperate, breathy. I swear, in his gaze, there are fireworks, lighting up, exploding, shocking me with an energy that only he is capable of. He could bring me to my knees. He grins, pulling his fingers from me and licking them clean. My stomach does a backflip. Fuck…
"Well aren't you just greedy tonight?" He grins, but grabs my ass, pulling me closer. I wrap one leg around his waist, keeping my hands on his shoulders for balance. He seems to take the hint and clutches the tops of my legs. I wrap my other leg around him and he slams me back into the wall of the shower, his erection pressing against the entrance of my cunt.
"Maybe you should stop being so hot then if you don't want me to want to fuck you." I murmur, my forehead pressed to his. I brush my lips across his, and he meets me in return by igniting a fire against his lips. I choke on my breath, just as quickly as the fire appeared it is gone, and again, there is no pain. Just a hot tickling sensation that makes me bite my lip. I grin.
"Now that, I can't just stop doing." He chuckles, grinding his hips to me, lining himself up…
"Then I guess you'll just have to deal with—fuck! Axel!" He sinks inside of me and I choke on a breath. The fullness of his fingers has nothing on how pleasantly his cock stretches me. A low growl rumbles from the base of his throat as he sheathes himself fully inside of me. He lets out a puff of air that prickles my skin, as he pumps into me, relentless, needy. Everything in his movements is completely wild, he thrusts into me, shallow and hard, burning for that same sweet release he just brought me. I'm utterly amazed by his strength, as he grips me. My fingernails scrape his back, he kisses my neck, he slams into me, breathing my name like a mantra. He slams into me with such ferocity that my back slips against the wall. I brace myself to hit the floor, but instead, an aggressive yanking sensation pulls my stomach, and suddenly my back hits our bed. We're drenched, dripping onto the sheets, but he hardly seems to care. Despite the teleportation, Axel doesn't miss a beat. He hammers into me, I buck my hips forward, my legs still around his waist, taking him as deep as I can. I watch his eyes roll back, hear the sound of him drawing a shaky breath. He's sputtering, on the verge of coming undone.
"Fuck, Rueki…dammit…" He chokes. Suddenly, he grabs my wrists, tearing my arms away from his back. He grips them tightly, slams them onto the bed, then lights a fire in his hands and rakes them down my arms. I scream, another orgasm ripping through me, so violently, that as I clench around him, I squirt.
He comes immediately after me, a delightfully wet burst. He's spasming as his limbs give out and he nearly collapses on top of me. I laugh, breathlessly.
"Damn, dude." I sigh. "Why have we not done that before?"
"You know, sweetheart, in case you've missed it, I'm kind of a hot mess. Me easing you into the kinky stuff is my way of trying not to scare you off." He snickers, lips finding the hollow of my neck. I giggle, running my fingers through his damp hair.
"Yeah, fat chance of you scaring me off. You could shove a hot poker up my ass and I still think it would be more pleasant than hanging out with Saix." I say. He doesn't even try to hide the fact that he snorts.
"Fortunately for you, this is about the extent of the fetishes I haven't previously exposed you to." He assures me.
"Lucky me." I say. "How did that not hurt?" I ask. He shrugs, still limp on top of me.
"It's easy when you have total control over the fire. But basically I've got two or three seconds I can expose you to the flames before they start to burn you." He offers. It seems a lot more complicated than that, but I suppose I've never been in complete control of an element.
"And you're sure that's not how I got that scar on my hip?" I raise an eyebrow. It would be an easy answer, if he just lost control over his element.
"Positive. What do you think I am, some kind of amateur?" He leans up finally, on his elbows, hovering over me. "You see any burns on you now?" He asks, cocky as all hell. But he shifts off of me, to lay beside me and I realize he's right. I'm clear. He takes my hand in his.
"We've sufficiently made a mess out of this comforter." Not only is it wet with my recent orgasm, but with him dripping out of me, and both of us dripping after the shower, I highly doubt we'll be able to sleep comfortably tonight.
"It was so worth it though." Axel chuckles. I grin, turning slightly so I can look at his face. His eyes flick up and he smiles at me, such a genuine, pure smile that it almost takes me back. "You okay, Rueks?" There's something in his expression that says that everything we just did was a desperate attempt to take my hurt away. He loves me so much.
"Yeah. As long as you're with me, I think I will be." I nod. "Looks like you've just got to be mine forever." I make a face, like the very thought is cringeworthy. He laughs and I savor the sound.
"Oh please, you were already stuck with me forever whether you wanted to be or not, princess." He says.
"Mmm, lucky me then. Stuck with someone I love."
"I love you too." He says.
A moment passes, silently, besides a background noise very similar to rain on a rooftop but somehow closer? My eyes go wide.
"Dammit, we didn't even fucking shower." I say. Axel throws his head back, laughing hysterically.
"Oh baby, I promise, we'll get to it." We don't until after he bends me over the bed, but I suppose it's the thought that counts.