XL.
"You've got the plan down then?"
"Of course. Show up. Go full power couple on his ass, get dinged up, come back and be like 'guys, I had an epiphany'."
"Sweetheart, it's gonna take a little more finesse than that."
"And that is why you will do the talking, and I'm going to do my best to just cry like a fragile flower."
"Damn straight."
Axel shampoos his hair, I shave my legs, showering together for things other than sex isn't exactly time pleasant for the two of us. It results in a lot of bumping hips, one of us being out of the water and freezing our ass off, or the stream of water cascading off of one of our bodies, attempting to drown the other. However, on a day like today, when efficiency is most important, we both somehow manage to snuff out our sexual urges in favor of getting our morning routine completed as efficiently as possible. It isn't an easy task. In his anxious state, Axel is handsy as all hell, and between the occasional brush of fingertips across my thigh, and the press of an early morning erection against my ass, I am wound up into a half crazed state, similar to what I can only imagine Saix feels when he goes Berserk. Maybe the secret this whole time really was just to get him laid.
There's a pause. A beat in the conversation where he's rinsing shampoo out of his hair and I am patiently waiting to rinse my razor blade. Well, as patiently as I can wait.
"What happens if all fails?" I finally ask.
"Then we open a portal and run until we die." He says. "And if this fails and we do get killed, it's been a hell of a run, sweetheart." His hands catch my face and he rubs a thumb across my cheekbone, keeping my eyes locked to his. In the mist radiating off of the shower stream, I have to squint my eyes to maintain this gaze.
"I love you, Axel." I say.
"I love you too, Rueks. In this life and if I'm lucky enough to get another one, in the next, too." He presses his lips down onto mine, searing, desperate. "Would it cheapen the moment if I said this might be the last time we're naked together?" He asks.
"Yes." I say. "But I'm so sick of sappy shit." I wrap my legs around his waist, set my razor aside and accept the thought of being a little late.
My hair is sopping wet, hanging in damp tendrils down my shoulders, as we head to Twilight Town. Survivor is strapped to my arm, the weapons pouch I once shoved a book into is now solely filled with synthesis items and grenades. Axel holds my hand as we walk through the portal, his eyes on me.
"You gonna be okay?" I ask him, my eyes flicking up to him. A tiny smile flicks at the edge of his lips.
"You said something once about it being humble to die for a good cause. This is one if I ever did see it." He shrugs. I can't tell if he's being sarcastic or not. If all blows up in our faces, then we have to go together. It's twisted, it's certainly not healthy, but I am so beyond the point of caring. I need him. Plain and simple.
"Since when are you a hero?" I raise an eyebrow. He grins wickedly at me.
"I'm not." He replies. "Let's live." Two very simple words that somehow mean everything. I feel new energy course through me.
We emerge right in front of the Usual Spot, with Roxas' back to us. A quick feel for my empathy link shows me what I expected. Today is his last day here. Sora is ready to absorb him. Hayner, Pence and Olette passed straight through him. This entire world, that was so accommodating to him isn't just rejecting him, but dissolving him into nothing. Forcing him to fade in every sense of the word.
"Hey, kid." I say. Roxas turns around to us, eyes wide. His eyes fly to where our hands meet, a united front, and then to us.
"I thought you wanted to save me." Roxas says.
"I said I was sorry I couldn't." I correct him.
"Look what it's come to. I've been given these icky orders to destroy you, if you refuse to come back with us." Axel says, playing the good cop, which he is infinitely better at playing than me.
"The three of us, we're best friends, right?" Roxas asks.
"Sure, but I'm not getting turned into a Dusk for…wait a sec, you remember now?" Axel asks. I shake my head.
"No, I kind of spilled the beans to him on that yesterday." I confess, detaching my hand from Axel's to tuck my hair behind my ear. I should've just put it up, damn.
"Come on, Roxas, give us anything." Axel sighs. "This would be so much easier. Just…our boss's name. Tell me that, we can fake it the rest of the way." And truly it would be a lot easier to just bring Roxas back to Xemnas, go along with what Axel initially was willing to do, but it would defeat the entire purpose. Sora must wake up today. Roxas looks at him, chewing his lip.
"Sorry, hun. I told you." I say. Axel looks to me, mouth pulled into a frown.
"He doesn't remember anything?" I know he's asking me to search the empathy link, but I don't need to. All I have to do is look into Roxas' eyes to know the answer to that.
"No." I say.
"Can't believe this…" Axel mutters. With the snap of my fingers, I summon a heard of Dusks to wear Roxas down before the real fight behinds. It is something Axel easily could've done, but I'm quicker to act, and damn, does summoning them feel good. I start to sift through my pocket, trying to come up with a game plan, my brain high on a power trip. Make this fight seem real, get hurt, but don't kill or be killed. A grenade might not be a bad way to start—
I don't realize time froze until I feel my being release from whatever hold was on it. My hand flies to my chest, I swear my heart is hammering loud enough for the entire town to hear it. Is that what it feels like? Being frozen. Roxas is gone, that much is clear right away. I look to Axel watching him do the same thing. Hell, I didn't expect this to be so taxing.
"Fuck." I choke out. "Naminé did that once. I didn't realize it feels like shit."
"Time moved forward without our bodies. It doesn't feel great." He rubs his back, as though there is an ache developing in his muscles.
"Do you have a lot of experience with that?" I raise an eyebrow. His torn expression doesn't soften.
"Don't ever get on Luxord's bad side. Trust me." Is all he offers. We stand there, this time the silence is a lot more uncomfortable. This is it. We're doing this. Somehow, looking at Roxas, it all feels more real. It feels a lot harder. "Where'd he head to?"
"He's on his way to the Old Mansion." I say, surprised by how easily I am able to locate my empathy link now. It's take a little bit of finesse, but now, there is no questioning, there is no guessing. My ever present Roxas tracking system seems to work better than ever. "Babe, are you gonna be able to do this?" I ask. I see the effort it is taking for his expression to stay neutral. "Look, you can take the mask off." I remind him.
"It just sucks." He shakes his head. "It fucking sucks. The Roxas we know is long gone." Something I battled only a few days ago. I know how bad it hurts, I guess I forgot that he hadn't experienced this pain yet. I wrap my arms around his waist and pull him in close, setting my head against his chest
"If you want, we can just bang it out." I offer. "We'll get busy while Roxas gets busy merging with Sora. We can just beat the shit out of each other afterward and say that he did it to us when we fought him." I offer, squeezing him a little tighter. It isn't a genuine offer and we both know that, however he smiles just the tiniest bit and my world doesn't feel so much like hell.
"I'll take you up on banging it out, if we make it out of this alive." He kisses my forehead.
"Axel if they…if they turn you into a Dusk…" I begin, thinking of how I will use any and every bit of dark magic that it takes to bring him back. "If they turn you, I'll just keep summoning Dusks, you'll have to do something, catch my attention, let me know it's you, but—" He cuts me off by pressing his lips to mine. His warmth never fails to work magic on me.
"I am not going to make you face this life alone." He promises. I trust him.
We teleport into the basement of the old mansion, just in time to watch Roxas round a corner, into a hallway. I snap my fingers, and the sensation of unleashing Dusks nearly makes my eyes roll back into my head. A surge of power floods through my veins. I could kill him. Right now, I could charge into battle, and with the darkness coursing through me, I have no doubt that I could lose sight of right and wrong. I could end everything. It would be so easy, so simple. No gamble to see if Axel and I make it out alive. Just the promise of us coming out on the other side.
I feel a burning hot hand on my shoulder and, like the yanking of a leash, I am brought back down to reality. My eye's flick to Axel's. How is it, that no matter what happens, he always manages to center me? I take a breath, trying to clear away the darkness creeping at the edges of my mind. This would be so easy, I think. To fall into darkness, to let it all consume me. I understand why the apprentices were so tantalized by this power. And yet, I dunno, I don't feel like a darker person. In the surge that comes from the magic I do, but it just doesn't seem like my heart is freshly darkened. In fact, the only thing that seems different is that now, when I reach into the depths of my being, in search of the empathy link, I can feel Roxas. The fog is lifting, microparticles in the air. I could reach out and yank if I wanted to.
The boy clears away the last of the Dusks and I watch a mask fall over Axel's features that I have never seen before. Something wicked, something villainous. This must've been the face he wore to taunt Sora in Castle Oblivion, because truly, it shoots a jolt of equal parts fear and arousal through me. How can he be so deliciously deadly? He crosses his arms to his chest and strides out, into the opening of the room.
"Simply amazing, Roxas." He drawls. Roxas' eyes widen as he whips around to regard us.
"Axel. Rueki." He whispers our names with new familiarity.
"He's remembering us." I tell Axel, but he's already got his sights set.
"I'm so flattered." He roars, summoning his Chakrams, wrapping the room in a wall of fire. Quickly, I grab a potion and a fire gem from my pocket and load them into Survivor. With a rush of energy, I cast NullAll on myself, thinking of how much easier it would be if I could just learn light magic and cast NullBlaze. But now, I'm immune to any and all elemental damage. "But, you're too late." Axel hisses, eyes narrowed at Roxas. I grab a grenade out of my pocket and watch as a look of utter fear crosses Roxas' features. My stomach drops. I want the expunging of guilt that comes with dark magic to return. I think to summon another heard of Dusks, when suddenly, Roxas takes a breath and that determined, heroic look I remember on Sora's features now crosses his. Two Keyblades materialize in his hand. I gasp, jumping back.
"Two?" I choke out, taking a step behind Axel. My lover's eyes narrow and I watch as he draws forward more fire, turning the floor to magma. Roxas winces.
"Come on, I'll make it all stop." Axel taunts, and I realize, there is no breaking his focus. He has to play the role of the villain, if he breaks character now, it will destroy him. And that's fine, I can work with that.
Roxas charges, but I throw a grenade to the ground and it explodes, knocking the Keybearer back into the wall of flames. He cries out, Axel teleports, moving too quick to keep up with. In a mad dash, Axel slashes with his Chakrams, at a blinding speed. I sprint in, just in time for Roxas' reflexes to catch up. He blocks Axel's attack. Axel stumbles back.
"Launch." I snap. Axel acts quickly, laying one Chakram flat. I flip off of it, down, behind where Roxas is guarding. With the NullAll cast upon me, I can move easily in and around the wall of fire, unaffected. I slash right at his back with Survivor, throwing my weight into the attack. Roxas stumbles over, but his Keyblades act to catch his fall. Where I leave off, Axel picks up, sending a burst of fire at Roxas before disappearing into the wall of flames. Roxas falls back into me, I kick him forward, but before I have time to attempt another attack, he spins, smashing his Keyblades down onto me. I hit the ground, knees falling into the magma. I throw my arms up over my head, trying to block his blades, but they crash into me, unrelenting. He's not letting up. I'm not going to need to fake any injuries, because these blades are sharper than the clunky key Sora fights with. The arm clad in Survivor is mostly safe, but the uncovered one takes the brunt of his attacks. I grunt, pushing upward, against him, and it works to push him off, but when I look down at my naked arm, I discover deep gashes across it.
Okay, now I'm pissed.
Axel comes flying out of the wall of fire, riding the wave of flames, but Roxas spins around in a countering move. He shoves his blades against Axel's spinning Chakrams. I chug a potion and watch my wound close up, thankful that Axel is stealing at least some of his attention. I huff, watching as Roxas, in a move that takes a hell of a lot of dexterity, uses one blade to block Axel and smashes the him into the ground with the other one. Roxas goes to unleash a brutal combo on the redhead, but I charge in Survivor at the ready. I smash my claw into his back and he cries out, but doesn't let up on Axel. Instead, Roxas sends him flying straight at the wall. I swear, I can palpably feel Axel tire, and the disappearance of the magma on the floor is only further proof of that. My eyes widen. My mind instantly flashes to Castle Oblivion.
There is no room left for mercy in Sora's heart.
Or Roxas'.
My stomach drops as the Keyblades are sent, pummeling into me. Make it count, Rueki, my mind tells me, but the kid isn't letting up at all. His blades crash into me with a force that I cannot counter. He smashes me into the ground, onto my back. I throw my arms up into an 'x' and tuck my legs to my chest, trying to protect my internal organs.
Once, twice, again and again, the breath is ripped straight from my lungs as Roxas attacks. Axel spirals at Roxas, but the kid is strong, he doesn't miss a beat. He whips around and with one arm, throws Axel into the wall. Just like that, the flames in the room are snuffed out. I try to stand on shaky legs when I feel the Keyblade make contact with my middle. I am thrown, half way across the room, and am sent crashing into Axel. My trembling hands clutch his coat as I try to catch my breath.
"Is this enough?" I whisper, my arms and legs sliced open and sore. I don't even want to assess my midsection. I'm certain that bruises are flowering across my skin. Axel looks like hell, his lip split open, and it looks like it is taking all of his effort to stand.
"Fuck, it's gonna have to be." He murmurs. I nod, weakly. With the flick of his wrist, Axel opens a portal behind us. "Act like you're dying." He orders, and hell, it doesn't need to be an act, I feel like shit. This better be worth something.
Roxas looks around, realizing just how dire the situation has become. My hands slip away from Axel and I crumble to my knees, panting. My eyes flick up to him. Axel sets a hand on my back as he tries to stay afoot.
"Rueki…Axel…" Roxas says our names like 'goodbye' and I offer him the most pathetic, broken smile there is.
"Let's meet again, in the next life." Axel offers.
"Yeah, I'll be waiting." Roxas nods.
"Oh kid…" I whisper, because this is the end for him, whether he knows it or not. Whether he wants it to be or not. Despite every effort he has made.
This is how things have always been meant to play out.
"Silly…Just because you have a next life…" Axel chuckles, humorlessly as I watch him fall backward, through the portal behind us, pretending to collapse. I follow suit and sail back, through the darkness.
I look and see Axel beside me and we're falling, falling, crashing straight to—
Shit!
We're in Twilight Town, at Sunset Hill, the real Twilight Town, I'm willing to bet. We're going to smash straight into the ground. At the last second, Axel has the reflexes to right himself. I don't. I land on my back with an 'oof', clutching my chest. I wheeze, desperately, feeling the impact throbbing at my ribs, radiating through my spine
"Fuck!" I choke.
"Are you alright?" A stupid question, and not Axel's voice. I sit up, too fast, my head spins. A pair of deep blue eyes meet mine.
"Naminé." I say. She offers me a half smile.
"The two of you let Roxas go." She says, looking from me to Axel. "Thank you."
"If we die, it's your fault." I tell her, trying to shake off the pain. Axel is suddenly at my side, crouched down. His lips find my temple but it does nothing to ease the ache shooting through my body.
"You want me to carry you back to the Castle, princess?" He asks. I snort, looking him over. He really does look like hell and in the glowing light of Twilight Town, I can see blossoming bruises.
"You can barely stand." I say.
"I'll take that as a yes." He smirks. Naminé looks between the two of us, her tiny smile growing.
"You're not running then?" She asks me.
"You already know the answer to that." I say. She giggles.
"Yes, but I thought it was polite to ask you." She says. Axel offers her a half smile.
"I tell you what, Naminé. When Rueki started having nightmares about Sora…there was a time I might just have killed you for what she was going through." Axel says, though with no malice to his voice. It's very matter of fact, almost like friendly teasing.
"And now?" She asks.
"Ha." He snorts. "Ask me in a few months, if we make it that long." He tells her, trying to help me to my feet. As he does, I look down and see that thankfully, the gash on my abdomen is large, but very artificial. Nothing that needs immediate attention.
"What you're doing is brave." She says.
"And foolish." I say.
"What will you do if Xemnas doesn't accept your decision?" She asks.
"Run. Try like hell not to get caught. It's a real strategic plan." Axel deadpans. Naminé's eyes drift from mine to Axel's.
"You know, there is another way. Does Xemnas know the truth about Rueki?" Naminé asks.
"Yeah." Axel sighs, pursing his lips. "It was the only way to keep her and me both out of trouble after we got back from Castle Oblivion."
"It would be a good bargaining chip." Naminé says. "If Rueki knew, the power she would have over—"
"No." Axel says, flatly. I sigh.
"Dude, if it keeps us alive—"
"If it's the only way to stay alive, then I'll break the news to you, but dammit, Rueki, don't push this, this week has been hell enough already. I don't wanna think about what could happen if you knew…" Axel sighs, turning to look away from me, his hands still wrapped around my arms as I lean into him. Fucking stubborn prick. "The only thing that's stopping him from completely using you is the fact that you don't know this secret. The second you're out of the dark, he'll know it and you'll be his pawn, unless you can get a leg up on him and that's not a risk I'm willing to take."
"It would be incredibly dangerous." Naminé agrees. "But…there's no way to keep the truth from her forever. Now that she's started remembering her past."
"I fucking hate that you guys are talking about me like I'm not even here." I grumble, though I certainly don't have the energy to argue. Naminé begins to twist her hands, Axel tenses a little.
"It'll break her." Axel finally murmurs. "You can see into her mind. I tell her, and you don't need to be able to see the future to know what happens. She'll be his slave, she'll lose herself to…"
"Yes. I know." Naminé nods. "You're right, but the two of you helped keep Roxas alive. I thought perhaps, I could help you both find a way to stay alive long enough for Kingdom Hearts to be completed."
"Oh, so you're not opposed to that?" Axel raises an eyebrow. "Twilight knows Sora's going to fight us tooth and nail on that one when he knows it'll help out his future enemies."
"Your boss is a moron, he'd be smart to try to get on Sora's good side. Let the kid think it's an alliance." I mutter.
"I would like to see Kingdom Hearts completed. After all, I would very much like to be a whole person. But I don't believe Sora would fall for that. His moral compass is too strong." Naminé says.
"True, that kid's got an iron will." Axel nods.
"Just like Roxas."
A silence falls over the three of us and another portal opens. I nearly jump, especially when I see the hooded figure that comes out of the portal. But I realize, quickly, just from his stance, that he is not a member of Organization XIII, here to assassinate Axel and I. No, this is the Imposter. Riku, maybe? He regards the three of us for a moment before his posture relaxes. Axel chuckles.
"Well, I guess that's that." He says, and I wonder how he still has the energy to laugh. I really should drink a potion, but then I guess I'd lose the flair of showing up, bloody and broken at the Castle That Never Was.
"Let's go." The hooded figure says, though to who, I don't know.
"Go where?" I scoff, miserably. To the hellhole that is the Castle That Never Was? I'd rather prolong that as much as possible. "It's not like we have homes to return to."
"We don't exist, remember?" Axel snickers and I find I still have the energy to elbow him.
"Shut the fuck up." I mutter.
"It's true." Naminé says. I think maybe I should swat her, but she quickly explains herself. "We may not have homes. But there is someplace I want to go. And someone I want to see." She sighs, and I don't know whether she's talking more about Roxas or Sora. My heart hurts. It breaks, it shatters, but the ultra hot hands that are wrapped around my squeeze tighter, and all of the hurt falls away. I think I will always miss Roxas. But…
He doesn't have anything on this man beside me. I look up at Axel, who smiles.
"You know, I think I've got everything I need right here." He says. My broken pieces are glued back together. There is safety, there is love inside his warmth. He's right. No matter what else happens, everything I need is right inside him. "So, you think you might let us go?" Axel asks the imposter. "I'm sure you're here to get rid of us, but…" I look to the man in black, and think, hey, how bad of a death could it possibly be? If we go down, then we go down together. This will be an infinitely easier pill to swallow than watching Axel get turned into a Dusk. It'll take a lot less work than running. I bring the hand that isn't covered with Survivor up to Axel's arm and squeeze gently.
Naminé gasps, eyes wide.
"DiZ wants to get rid of me?" She asks, truly seeming offended.
"Go." The cloaked figure says, as though it is the easiest choice of all. Truly, this must be someone like Riku, someone with as big of a heart as Sora. This kind of goodness is nonexistent in the company I've been keeping.
"You sure about this?" Axel raises an eyebrow, holding me a little tighter. I want to yell at him for looking a gift horse in the mouth, but no matter what happens now, we're on thin ice. Possibly die here, possibly die there. I fear we're playing with borrowed time and it scares the shit out of me.
"I owe you all." The figure says.
"For what?" I ask.
"Castle Oblivion. You helped us." He says. The overwhelming feeling of warmth spreads through me, and suddenly, every ounce of guilt I have felt, every worry that I have had, that I played a big hand in Sora's destruction at Oblivion washes away. This isn't like the numbness that comes when the strange memories suddenly disappear. This is true release.
"Heh, you don't have to tell me twice." Axel opens up a portal and wraps an arm underneath my arms, helping keep me upright. He squeezes me gently as we start into the portal. "This could be the end, sweetheart." He reminds me as we move forward.
"I know." I say. "You ready?"
He pauses for a moment and then, turns to look at me, the mask coming off completely, a look so pure, so honest washing over his features.
"What's one more battle, beside the girl I love?" He asks.
"Nothing we can't take down together." I nod.
Let's see if that's true.