Chapter Fourteen - Home Truths
It took Hannah over a month to finally regain some of her confidence but once it began to creep back in she found it easier and easier to return to the person she used to be. Spending time with her family helped a lot and she especially enjoyed seeing Danny and Roxanna get to know one another even though Danny didn't know the truth yet; Hannah was unsure whether she wanted him to know just yet and Roxanna respected her decision.
At first Hannah did everything in her power to avoid John and the trial even though it was still running in a theoretical capacity. Roxanna and Abigail were the only two people who knew that anything had ever happened between them and Roxanna swore she would take the secret to her grave if it was what Hannah wanted. When she had to brace the subject with Abigail, Hannah felt uncomfortable and was uncertain whether she would agree to keeping the secret but she agreed to and agreed to give both John and Hannah second chances regarding their careers. Hannah had to keep her head down for a few weeks but it was easy enough as she became better acclimatised to things again.
After a couple of weeks, the police managed to track down the two men who had attacked Hannah and she had a brief relapse into her fear and self-consciousness but knowing that they were answering for their crimes helped ease some of her pain a little and she was glad it was finally over. Moving on from Jac's death was more difficult and the ward had a sombre feeling that Hannah didn't like; but she kept her head down and continued to work hard, letting herself be overlooked by others for a few weeks, she needed the space.
Two weeks later John began to get restless about her inclusion with the current state of the trial. He tracked her down every day and spent a considerable amount of time trying to convince her to re-join the trial and help him through the speed bumps. Roxanna had forgiven him and was already back on the trial, if she had even ever left, but Hannah didn't know if she could bring herself to do it.
Six weeks after Jac's death, to the day, Hannah was summoned down to the wet lab and she had a pretty good idea of what was coming. She steeled herself as she entered the lab but didn't see John there. Her eyes lingered on the desk where she and John had been together but she was forced to tear her eyes away as unwanted feelings began to creep into her chest.
'Hannah, hello.' John said from behind her as he entered the lab and she turned to meet him.
'You wanted to see me.' she replied and he nodded, walking past her to replace some files on the desk, she stayed where she was.
'Yes, I did.' he said but Hannah interrupted him before he could begin giving her the spiel about joining the trial.
'John right now I need to focus on my patients I cannot be involved with the trial in any capacity. I have told you that I will let you know when I'm ready and then I'll come back, but honestly, just being around you is pretty painful and I don't know how long it will take me to recover; it might be all the same to you but you humiliated me a little bit.' she explained slowly and he stopped what he was doing to look at her before dropping his eyes once she was done.
'I actually wanted to ask your advice about a patient on Keller.' he said quietly and Hannah stopped short for a moment before her cheeks began to burn red.
'What about Ms Tate? She's much more qualified than I am.' she tried to justify.
'She's also the CEO of the hospital, she doesn't have much time to spare as it is... besides, I missed you.' he said quietly, refusing to meet her eye. She raised an eyebrow at him and shook her head in disbelief.
'Are you kidding me? No, I'm serious, are you actually joking? You were the one who sent me packing! Let me guess, you've changed your mind, again?' she asked, her voice slightly raised as anger began to replace embarrassment.
'It wasn't like that and you know it.' John said sternly, his own voice raising in pitch but before she could reply Hannah's phone began to ring in her pocket. She held up a finger to John to indicate that she wasn't finished with their conversation and answered the phone, it was Danny's nanny.
'Hey Sofie.' Hannah said into the phone and listened for a moment before her face fell. 'What do you mean? No please, you can't... just... alright, I'll sort something. Thanks for letting me know, I guess. Bye.' Hannah hung up the phone and looked like she might cry.
She closed her eyes tightly and took a couple of deep breaths but they were shaky as she tried to restrain the tears of frustration mixed with her anger at John; she gripped onto the edge of the lab counter but she still didn't feel stable or steadied.
'What's the matter?' John asked quietly and Hannah took a sharp intake of breath and clenched her hands into fists.
'Sofie, Danny's nanny, just quit and told me she's actually leaving the area. She can't even pick him up from the summer school club this afternoon, which is just great. I really didn't need this right now.' she explained, looking down at the desk. 'Finding Sofie was hard enough, there are so few nanny's in the area, finding childcare is a bloody nightmare.' her breathing was quickening in her frustration and John quickly came around the desk towards her and put his hands on her shoulders.
'Alright, just breathe, calm down.' he spoke gently and she wanted to shrug him off but she was too busy trying to focus on her breathing and calming herself down.
'I just really didn't need this right now. I have nowhere to put Danny so I'm going to have to start cutting my shifts short which means I won't be able to afford the rent on the house and the bills and Jesus... this is just poorly timed.' she vented, unsure why she was telling John any of this, she didn't want anything from him.
'Shhhh.' he comforted her and she let herself be pulled to his chest as he comforted her even though she was still angry. Despite her annoyance at him and the situation he had put them in, she couldn't lie about the fact that she still liked to be near him. She craved his smell and his comfort, the way her head fitted into his shoulder and the feel of his cheek against her forehead. How close his lips were, how easily she could lean up and just kiss him… She stopped herself thinking these thoughts, she focused on her current predicament instead.
'I hate being a single mum, I love the freedom I have now I don't live with dad anymore but it's so hard...' she mumbled into his chest and he held her a little tighter and paused for a moment before broaching his suggestion.
'Why don't you bring Danny here?' he asked and Hannah froze for a moment, unsure of his meaning.
'I can't keep him on the ward Abigail would go ballistic.' she said and John took a step back, letting her go, much to her disappointment.
'I mean bring him down here, I can keep an eye on him until you finish your shift. I'll stick him in there and keep him hidden, I'm down here most of the time working on the trial anyway and Abigail hardly ever comes down here herself.' he reasoned and Hannah seemed to consider but John could see that she wasn't keen on the idea.
'Just for a few days until you can find a new nanny?' he suggested and she still seemed a little uncertain as she scrutinised him but he took her arms again. 'Please let me help.' he asked and she seemed to consider him for a moment before nodding.
'Alright, but just for a few days.' she said firmly. A few days turned into a few weeks and by the time September came around John was still watching Danny in the lab every afternoon.
Over this time, Hannah and John gradually got over their awkwardness and became adept at hiding their feelings for one another again. Hannah was surprised that Abigail never found out about Danny's hiding spot in John's lab but she was glad that John was there for him. She liked to see them together even if it did make her heart hurt a little to see what she could never have, a family she desperately wanted.
Over this time, the stabbing cases which were brought into AAU became more violent and more frequent and the police search for the Holby serial killer was intensified which frightened the staff somewhat. The killer didn't seem to have any particular victim preference: young, old, women and men were all brought into the ED and referred straight to AAU and the press seemed amazed that the killer was going undetected for so long. Then they started to slow down a little before eventually dropping off altogether in the first week of September.
Danny was due back at school on the Friday of this week but the summer school club was closed for the beginning of the week to give the school a chance to train teachers and recuperate before starting term again. John kept Danny in the lab all day and Hannah came by as often as she could. Danny's birthday was on the Monday and they threw him a little party with cakes and sweets and the few people who knew he was down there, including Hanssen, Dom, Lofty, Sacha and Roxanna, all came down to join in at one point or another.
Hannah used the excuse of helping John with the trial to spend as much time with the two of them as possible and it became clear that she was back on board. Two days later, however, Hannah was forced to stay on the ward as they had a high number of patients. Hannah was assigned the case of a thirty-two-year-old man called Tony Langdon.
'Morning Mr Langdon!' she greeted him brightly and he gave her a nervous smile, he seemed jumpy and held a bag tightly to his chest. He had a shock of strawberry blonde hair and bright green eyes and he looked strong.
'Hello, uh, please call me Tony. Mr Langdon is too formal.' he said, his voice was quiet and timid, he seemed shy.
'Alright, what seems to be the problem today Tony?' Hannah asked as she pulled out his notes and skimmed through them. Of course, she already knew the symptoms he was presenting with but she preferred to hear it from the patients.
'My chest... hurts.' he replied and she nodded.
'Whereabouts does it hurt?' she asked and he pointed to a large area of his chest. Hannah gave him a slight smile and pulled her stethoscope from around her neck.
'I'm gonna have a listen to your chest if that's okay?' she asked and he nodded but kept the bag clutched tightly to his chest.
'Do you want me to pop that on the floor for you?' she asked and there was a sudden flash of aggression in his otherwise timid eyes as he snatched the bag away.
'No.' he replied firmly and she held up her hand but was instantly uneasy, she didn't like what she'd seen in his eyes; it reminded her of that confined anger she had seen in Liam's eyes one too many times.
'Okay... can you lean forward for me?' she requested and he did so. She listened to his chest and back and found that there was a slight murmur.
'Does your family have a history of heart problems, Tony?' she asked and he shrugged.
'I don't know who my parents are, I was left in a home when I was a baby.' he said and Hannah paused.
'Right, sorry.' she said slowly as she made a note of the murmur. 'Okay, we're gonna have to run some more tests to find out what's wrong, that will include a CT scan and you won't be able to take your bag. Are you sure you don't want me to put it somewhere safe?' she asked and he nodded firmly.
'It stays with me.' he replied decisively and she nodded, deciding to fight that battle when she got there. In the meantime, she ordered the tests and kept a close eye on Tony. There was something off about him which made her uncomfortable but she did her best to hide her discomfort as the day wore on.
When the CT scan was ready for him she returned to the subject of his bag.
'Listen,' she said and leaned down towards him, 'I can put it in the office and nobody will go near it, I promise, you can have it back the moment you come back on the ward. It will be ten minutes, tops.' she said and Tony seemed to consider for a moment. 'You can trust me.' she assured him and he sighed before nodding, handing it over to her gently.
She took it and headed towards the office as the porter took him away to CT. When Hannah got into the office the door was propped open against the heat; there was a storm forecast for that night but in the meantime the heat was building. She placed the bag down on the sofa but it slipped and fell onto the floor and there was a metallic clang from inside. Hannah paused a moment, she knew that it wasn't her place to go through his property but if there was something fragile in there she wanted to check it wasn't broken.
She crouched down and opened the bag, she wasn't prepared for what was inside. There was a long, sharp knife inside along with a selection of smaller knives, razors and scalpels and a mask like something out of a horror movie. Hannah was shocked and didn't know what to think, at first, she thought they might be fake but as she touched her finger to a blade she realised they were all real. She quickly picked up the bag and placed it back on the sofa, she needed to keep it away from Tony, it was dangerous.
She didn't know what to do, she didn't know if she should call the police straight away, she didn't want to jump to any conclusions about her patients but she was also frightened to ask the truth of him; that look of aggression in his eyes hadn't been fake after all.
She decided that she needed a second opinion and left the office through the opposite door; she hadn't noticed that the porter had paused with Tony outside the door on the other side of the corridor. Tony had seen everything Hannah had done and he knew what she suspected. The porter had disappeared so Tony ignored his chest pain and slipped into the office to his bag. He fished inside for a moment before selecting a small blade he could conceal easily and then made to follow Hannah, keeping a safe distance the whole while.
When Hannah arrived at the lab she found John helping Danny with some summer homework he had left until the last minute.
'You're not meant to be letting him distract you from work!' Hannah smiled as she gave Danny a hug and then produced a five-pound note. 'You remember how to get to Pulse's?' she asked and he nodded. 'Cool, go get yourself a muffin or something.' she instructed and Danny rushed off. He passed a man in the corridor outside but ignored him, Tony hid himself outside of the lab in a place where he could hear the conversation happening inside but couldn't be seen.
'Are you sure he'll be alright by himself?' John asked and Hannah shrugged.
'He's not leaving the hospital, it's just upstairs. Besides he inherited my smarts.' she smiled but her smile fell quickly.
'What's wrong?' John asked, sensing that Hannah wasn't just there to catch up with them.
'Okay, I'm treating this patient, right, and I know I shouldn't have gone through his personal property but I heard this clank and I wanted to check that there wasn't anything broken but I found something a little odd in his bag...' she said quickly and John narrowed his eyes.
'Odd how?' he asked and she sighed.
'I found a mask and bunch of knives, this might sound crazy but I think he might be somehow connected to those attacks? I don't want to assume anything or draw attention to myself but I don't know what to do!' she explained quickly and John nodded solemnly.
'Well you need to call the police.' he said and she nodded.
'I know that,' she said quickly but still seemed uncomfortable. 'I just don't want him to suspect anything, I don't want to run the risk of anything going wrong or anyone getting hurt, especially not after...' she stopped and John thought for a moment before he nodded and sighed.
'Alright, you go back up to the ward and keep an eye on him, make sure he doesn't cause any trouble and I'll call the police from down here. Try not to let on that you suspect anything.' John said and, outside, Tony froze on the spot.
He had gone for so long without being detected from some of the sharpest minds in Holby but here he was about to be caught by his doctor. He hadn't wanted to come to the hospital but he hadn't had any choice when his chest pains had flared up. He knew that he needed to run but he needed to create a distraction, something to keep the doctors busy whilst he made his escape.
Just then the little boy came back around the corner clutching a chocolate cake in one hand and a handful of change in the other hand. As a rule, Tony had always left kids alone, the youngest person he had hurt had been sixteen years old, but now he knew he had no choice. He quickly grabbed the boy as he walked past and he dropped his cake and the change clattered to the floor but the doctors inside the lab didn't seem to hear anything - Tony could overhear the male one telling Ms Hanssen to be careful.
Tony didn't look at the boy as he struggled against his grip but kept a hand over his mouth to muffle his shouts. Tony carefully slipped the blade into his flesh and held onto him for a few more moments while he struggled but he eventually went limp and fell to the floor. Tony retracted the knife and then began to run, leaving the child bleeding on the floor and unconscious.
'I mean it, Hannah, be careful.' John said and took her hand to stop her leaving, she looked down at his hand before stepping forward to hug him quickly. She was a little frightened of how the situation might turn out but she knew that she had to do what John told her even though she would rather stay in the lab with him and Danny. After all, she had a duty of care and Tony was still her patient and she needed to treat him.
'I'll see you later.' she whispered into his ear and he hugged her back tightly before she pulled away and left the lab. It took her a second to feel like something was wrong, and when she turned the corner and saw the cake on the floor amidst the scattered coins she stopped dead. She stopped breathing as she slowly walked around the corner and saw the pool of blood slowly spreading out from under a small body.
Her entire body felt numb as she approached the child lying in the pool of his own blood. There was a ringing in her ears as she fell to her knees, of course she was aware it was Danny but it felt so unreal. She slowly reached out to touch him, to pull him onto his back where she could see his face. She couldn't feel the tears falling down her face but she saw the drops fall onto his shirt and mingle with his blood as she pulled him up onto her lap and cradled him to her chest. She couldn't think rationally, not seeing her son lying there like that, the ringing was persistent.
'John...' she heard her voice somewhere in the distance, she could only focus on her son but she tried to force her voice to be louder, to get his attention. She overshot it a little.
'John!' she screamed and the ringing broke as she fell back into the real world and the shock and panic crashed into her as she began to shake. Holding Danny tighter and trying to put pressure on the wound in his chest, she became increasingly aware that her front was becoming drenched in his blood, her hands already were.
John appeared around the corner a moment later and paused as he took in the events surrounding them, then he too rushed forward and took Danny's head in his hands. He was better at dealing with things in a crisis, he was better at keeping calm and doing what needed to be done.
'Hannah, we need to get him up to AAU.' he said calmly and she looked up at him with wide, tear-filled eyes.
'It's Danny... he's been stabbed...' she replied absently and John nodded, he understood the effect of shock.
'Hannah, we have to move now, let me take him.' he held out his arms for Hannah to pass him the unconscious body of her son but she clutched him tighter, seemingly coming a little more to her senses.
'No, I'll take him...' she whispered and allowed John to help her to her feet whilst she held her young son to her chest. She clutched him as tightly as she could, hoping she could staunch the bleeding a little with her body.
John pushed open the doors as they rushed up to AAU and when they arrived on the ward a bed was immediately found for Danny and he was rushed into theatre with Serena operating.
Hannah insisted on being in the gallery and John didn't dare leave her. She wouldn't even let him lead her away to clean her up despite being covered in his blood, John too had blood all down his front - it looked like the pair of them had been in theatre without the protection of gowns and gloves.
'He has to be okay...' she whispered as she stared at the operation, her eyes hardly blinked but John wondered how much she really took in. He took a small step forward and, without looking, her hand found his and held on tightly. He did his best to comfort her but there was only so much he could do. He felt just as panicked as she was but he couldn't let it show, he had to be strong for her but he wondered if Henrik and Roxanna had been made aware and if the perpetrator had been caught. He couldn't run the risk of leaving Hannah alone to find out anything.
Just as a machine began to ding persistently, alerting them to complications with Danny, Hanssen burst into the gallery but slowed when he saw John and Hannah both covered in blood and Danny lying on the operating table.
'He can't die!' Hannah cried as Serena began to act quicker, something was wrong, they were going to lose Danny. Hanssen found her other hand and she gripped to both men tightly as she sobbed but could never move her eyes from the operating table, from Danny's face. Danny began to arrest and Hannah's fear increased, she let go of John's hand and found herself burying into her father's chest as he held her tightly, tears pouring down his own face as he speechlessly watched his grandson dying and he couldn't do a thing.
In that moment, John knew that he shouldn't be there, that this was a family matter but at the same time he couldn't bring himself to leave. He was surprised to find tears in his own eyes and slipping down his cheeks as he watched the world-class surgeons fight to save Danny's life but there was nothing he himself could do. Over the course of the past couple of months Danny and he had become close, John valued the relationship he had with him because it brought him all the closer to Hannah. The truth was they were the closest thing he had to a family and it broke his heart to see them breaking up now, not like this.
Serena was becoming frantic, she was panicking as Danny became less and less responsive, he was dangerously close to being lost. Hannah shoved her hands over her ears, desperate to block out what was happening around her and Henrik stared at his grandson's small face which was almost obstructed by the sheets put up around him.
John put his hand to his face, ignoring the blood which had almost completely dried now, all he could try and do was physically repress the sobs he wanted to let out.
The moment Danny's heart began to beat in rhythm again both John and Henrik let out a sigh of relief, as surgeons they knew that Danny wasn't out of the woods yet but this was a good sign. Ric Griffin was called into theatre to help Serena and together, they succeeded in bringing Danny back from the brink. Over the course of two and a half hours, the three in the gallery barely moved, sometimes they barely breathed. Hannah continued to cling to her father but gradually emerged to watch the operation again and by the time they were done she was pressed up against the glass. She had cried herself to exhaustion and now she was pale, her eyes ringed red and her cheeks still damp, but she couldn't cry any more.
'He'll be moved to ITU and then on to paediatrics but I think he's in the clear for now - he should be okay.' Serena told them once she had emerged from theatre, she also looked exhausted and Hannah wondered how she could ever thank this woman for saving her family. She wordlessly walked forward and threw her arms around Serena, hugging her tightly. Serena was taken back for a moment before she gently held her back, her eyes connecting with Henrik's.
'Thank you.' Hannah whispered as he detached herself and Serena gave her a small smile.
'You don't need to mention it.' she said, John hung back, looking down at his bloody hands.
'What happened?' Hanssen eventually asked as they took seats outside the gallery, waiting for Danny to be brought out and transferred.
'I was treating a patient who I thought might be the man the police are looking for, he must have twigged that I'd worked it out and attacked Danny. He was up on Darwin, he needed more tests...' she told him and gave John a look, he nodded, confirming his understanding, and crossed to Donna at the nurse's station.
'Is Danny okay?' Donna asked without waiting for John to say a word.
'He is, at least he will be.' John said and finally realised how emotionally drained he was himself, 'Could you please do me favour?' he asked and Donna nodded.
'Of course, anything.' she replied.
'I need you to call Darwin and check if any patients have gone missing, just walked out without being discharged or something.' he requested and Donna nodded, picking up the phone.
'You think a patient did that to Danny?' she asked as she dialled the number and John nodded.
'We think that a patient has been doing this to a lot of people.' he explained and realisation clicked in Donna's head. She nodded slowly and held the phone up to her ear. John waited to hear the verdict but he knew the answer from her face before she said a word. Tony Langdon had disappeared from the ward and his bag was gone from the office, John instructed Donna to call the police immediately, it looked like they knew the identity of the Holby serial killer at last.
John returned to Hannah and Henrik as Danny was wheeled out of theatre and transferred to ITU. Hannah made to follow him but her father put a hand out to stop her.
'You need to change and clean up first.' he instructed and Hannah's eyes widened at the thought that she couldn't be with her son. 'When he wakes up how would it look to see you covered in his blood? He'll be frightened, no, you need to clean up.' he said and she knew it made sense so allowed him to lead her away and hand her over to Donna who would look after her. Left behind, John sighed and watched it all unfold around him. He wasn't really a part of it he knew that, he knew that Hannah needed her family then and he had rejected her attempts to make him a part of it. It was his own fault, but he knew that she didn't need him then, she needed her family.
He watched them leave and then retreated to clean himself up, making a final resolution not to let himself be responsible for Hannah's heartbreak ever again, he cared about her too deeply to let that happen.
Hannah allowed herself to be led by Donna and to be scrubbed and changed until she was clean and by that point the day was drawing to a close and evening was fast approaching along with the dark and the storm which had been threatening since that morning. Thunder rumbled in the distance and rain had begun to spatter down.
She wanted to be with Danny; until she saw him again she knew that she wouldn't be able to think straight, until then her brain was just in a muddle.
As soon as Donna gave her the all clear and a quick hug she went off in search of her son. When she arrived, she was told she had just missed her father who had gone back to her house to pack both her and Danny some overnight things and she made a mental note to thank him, she knew that he would make smarter choices than her, he would be able to keep a clearer head.
She sat down at his bedside and made herself comfortable, and then she let herself think, if only to sort out the mess of her jumbled thoughts.
All of this had happened because she had found out about Tony's real identity; but what kind of monster would hurt a child to protect himself? It didn't really matter what she thought though, she was sure that he had a serious heart condition which would need surgical treatment before too long so he would have to go to a hospital sooner or later and then he would be caught. But as she looked down at her son she came to realise some horrible truths - her son had nearly died and if he had what would she have been left with? She would have had her parents for comfort and her friends but what was she doing with her life? What if Tony had decided to take out his fear on Hannah instead of Danny? It could still happen, she was the one to oust him in the first place if she wasn't now a target she would be surprised. She was tired of living her life within boundaries - of holding onto things which needed to be let go. She wanted to feel like she was alive instead of just living, and that had to begin today.
She stood as Roxanna rushed into the room, she took one look at Danny and then looked at Hannah and rushed forward. Hannah met her and the two women embraced, holding on tightly to one another for their own comfort as well as for the others'.
'I only heard about what happened once I finished my shift, my God Hannah I'm so sorry. I should have been there...' Roxanna said quickly as she stepped back but didn't let go of Hannah.
'Stop, it's okay!' Hannah said, surprised at her own calm. 'He's okay now and that's the main thing, he'll be alright.'
'Are you alright?' Roxanna asked and Hannah thought for a moment before nodding.
'I am, he's going to be fine I can feel it. Can I actually talk to you about something, though?' Hannah asked and Roxanna took her hands.
'Of course, anytime.' she replied and sat Hannah down, taking another chair for herself and pulling to the same side so she could sit next to Hannah.
Hannah took a deep breath and readied herself, thinking carefully about the best way to word what she wanted to say. Roxanna waited patiently, watching her face for any sign as to whether she had something good or bad to say. Eventually, Hannah decided what she wanted to say.
'When Danny wakes up he's going to need all the support he can get, all the family he can get, and the truth is I need all the family I have too. I'm tired of us being so dysfunctional as a family, that's not saying that I want you and dad to work some miracles and get together or anything I get that that's not going to happen and to be honest I'm not sure I want it to but I'm getting off track...' Hannah sighed and twisted her hands together. 'I guess what I'm trying to say is that I want you to be my mum, properly, and I want Danny to know that you're his grandma, I want you to get to know him better and spend more time with him alone even. I just want us to start working all together as a family instead of just being a group of people who just so happen to be related. Life is too short not to spend it with the people you love and I love you guys. I want to start enjoying my relationships rather than just putting up with them.'
Roxanna was speechless for a moment as she digested everything Hannah had said. Of course, she understood completely where her daughter was coming from but she wasn't quite sure she understood the full extent. She knew that she wasn't just thinking about their family, Hannah was thinking on a much larger scale, all Roxanna could do was be grateful that she had been included in that scale.
'I don't know what to say...' Roxanna answered honestly and Hannah gave her a small smile.
'You don't have to say anything for now, but there is someone else I need to make peace with and sort out my relationship with, could you stay with Danny? I don't want him to have no one if he wakes up.' she requested and Roxanna knew this was the beginning of her duties as grandmother and couldn't repress the emotion which swelled up in her chest, she had never been more grateful.
'Of course.' she whispered and Hannah gave her another smile before both women stood. Hannah thought for a moment before hugging Roxanna tightly and Roxanna held her back just as tightly.
When they released one another Hannah paused for a moment and gave her another knowing smile before hurrying towards the door, she needed to catch her next target before they left the building, for all she knew they already had. Roxanna sat back down slowly before tentatively reaching out and taking Danny's hand. He didn't stir from his sleep but Roxanna couldn't help but smile, he was her grandson and she was so proud to have him in her life.
Hannah took the lift down to the basement and hurtled out but the wet lab was empty. She didn't let herself feel any sense of disappointment but instead turned on her heel and ran back up the stairs taking them two at a time. As she hurried into the lobby she ran straight into Meena.
'Ms Hanssen!' Meena exclaimed, shocked and a little annoyed but she composed her face as she observed Hannah looking around wildly. 'How's Danny? I heard he was hurt?' Meena asked with genuine sincerity but it didn't seem like Hannah had even heard her.
'Have you seen John… Professor Gaskell?' she asked impatiently and Meena was taken aback for a moment.
'He just went out into the car park, he was waiting for the rain to let up a little but it's not stopping so he just went...' she said but Hannah didn't hear, instead she was already running toward the door. 'Bye!' Meena shouted after her before rolling her eyes and walking in a different direction.
Sure enough, as she ran out into the dark, car park, rain was hammering down in the night and Hannah's eyes had to search through the darkness to catch sight of John who was by his car. Hannah ran through the rain, ignoring how she was drenched in a few moments, in his direction.
'John!' she called and he looked up from where he had placed his bag in the passenger seat of his car. He closed the door slowly but Hannah stopped a few feet away, there was nobody else nearby but she was a little nervous.
'Hannah, what's wrong, is Danny alright?' John asked, he took a step towards her but didn't close the distance.
'He's not woken up yet, I didn't come for him though.' she said and pushed aside the feelings of foolishness, she had to let herself be brave and confront her emotions head on. 'I'm tired of this.' she said and John looked confused.
'Tired of what?' he asked even though he was sure he knew the answer.
'Us. Us pretending that we're something we're not. We both have feelings for one another and we're both trying to repress them or pretend they don't exist or something and I can't do it anymore, I don't want to. It took my son nearly dying to realise that life is too short not to feel the way I do about you and especially not to do anything about it, and I'm not going to let you push me away again because, for better or worse, I want to be with you.'
By the time she was finished she was breathing heavily and the rain had soaked her through completely but she hardly noticed it. John was also soaked without noticing and for a few moments they both looked at one another before Hannah realised she needed to put in a failsafe.
'If you've changed your mind, if you don't feel the same way then just say and I'll never mention it ever again. But if you do still feel the same way then, please, give us a chance. Just, say yes.' she added and he took another step towards her so they were closer than before. There was a tension in the air that almost made Hannah want to run away but she repressed her fear.
'Yes.' he said at last and Hannah grinned, letting out a small laugh before she stopped and shrugged.
'So, what now?' she asked quietly and he thought for a moment before smiling slightly.
'Well, can I kiss -' he began but before he could finish his question her lips were on his and her arms were around his neck. He wrapped his arms around her waist and lifted her off her feet as they kissed in the rain.