Chris returned home to her apartment in D.C. and, aside from the texts that came in each night from Bucky, her life went back to normal. Then he let her know he was being sent on a mission in southern Africa, not far from Wakanda, and he'd be gone for a couple of weeks and she'd hear from him when he got back. Part of her hoped that would be the end of it.

Part of her missed him. Really missed him. She did her damnedest to block out that voice. Loving Bucky Barnes wasn't a mistake she planned to make.

Work kept her busy, so Chris spent many days holed up in her apartment, reviewing data, hunting people and information down. She left here and there to get groceries or toiletries, but she was never gone for longer for an hour or so.

By the sixth week, Chris still missed him, but it was getting better and worse. Was he just out for the mission still? Or had he found someone else? Had Steve finally stopped being an idiot?

Lisa Medford, another agent she'd worked with a couple of years before called her that Friday night, inviting her out for dinner and drinks. Considering she'd been living in her pajamas for the last two weeks, it sounded fun. They met up at one of her favorite Italian restaurants in the city and enjoyed dinner, wine. Wine led to the bar on the next block and pool. And whiskey shots.

Chris was flying high by the time it got past midnight.

"I'm never playing pool with you again," Lisa let her know, hands on her hips as she went down in defeat.

"Told you I do better when I'm buzzed," Chris teased her, clearing the last three balls on the table to end the game.

"Can we get in on the next game?" a tall, blond guy who'd been eying them from the bar the last couple of hours. He looked to be somewhere in his twenties, maybe a smidge younger than Lisa and herself. His friend had red hair and a red face from drinking. His gaze slid over Chris in a way that she really didn't appreciate.

"Or you could just go home with us," the ginger told them with a toothy grin.

Lisa had been about to say something when an all too familiar voice said, "They were just leaving."

Chris spun around to see Bucky standing there behind her, glaring at the other men. He was an intimidating figure in a black leather jacket and jeans.

"Chill, dude," the ginger said in a sarcastic tone. "We were just asking."

"And you just got an answer," Bucky told him, his flesh hand pulling her jacket from the back of her chair and wrapping it around her shoulders.

"What are you doing here?" Chris asked, feeling a little intimidated as the two guys moved on quickly to another part of the bar.

"I came to see you, doll," he told her, so much emotion in those blue eyes that she'd missed. "You said we could visit each other, remember?"

Chris did remember. "This isn't visiting. This is stalking. How did you find me?"

"Experience from an old job," he replied. "Let's head back to your place."

Chris blew out an exhale. She got that reference. It was late, and it would be easier to deal with the situation if she called it night and took him home.

"Lisa, I'm sorry," Chris offered. "This is Bucky. Bucky this is Lisa. We used to work together."

Bucky didn't offer a hand, but he did nod.

"Sorry about this, but I'm going to have to call it a night," was the best she could do.

Lisa wasn't letting her off the hook that easily.

"I don't blame you," Lisa said grinning at Bucky. Grabbing her purse, she told Bucky it was nice to meet him. Leaning in to whisper to Chris. "I know who that is. I want this story later."

With that, Lisa made her way out of the bar and Bucky steered her in the same direction. Chris didn't say anything as they started walking up the sidewalk.

"You're quiet, doll," Bucky said, but she could feel his worry beneath that cool facade. "Not happy to see me?"

Chris took his left hand in hers, holding it as they walked along. She could feel the hardness of the metal through the black glove.

"I am happy to see you," Chris admitted. "I just didn't expect you to surprise me out on the town."

"I didn't expect you to be out on the town."

Fair enough. Chris smirked at him. "I get out once in a while. Lisa's a lot of fun."

"Especially when you're hammered, huh?" Bucky's voice was sharper with her, letting her know he wasn't happy.

"Are you mad at me?" Chris asked.

"Mad's not the word I'd use," Bucky said as they walked along.

"What word would you use?" She wanted to know.

Bucky blew out an exhale. "Look you've clearly had quite a bit to drink and those two guys who were coming on to you back there are quite a bit bigger than you are doll. Wasn't that a little careless?"

"I'm also a fucking FBI agent, Bucky." Chris let go of his hand, losing her temper. "I'm not an Avenger, granted, but I can handle myself. I don't need you or anyone else to rescue me."

Chris sped up, but he kept pace with her. After a few minutes, he apparently couldn't take the silence.

"M'sorry," he muttered. "I just didn't like the way either of them looked at you."

Chris stopped, grinning at him. "See? That wasn't so hard, was it?"

Slowly, he returned her smile, reclaiming her hand as her apartment building came into view.

"You've already been to my apartment, haven't you?"

Bucky nodded. "It was the first place I checked."

Chris didn't want to know how he figured out from there where she actually was.

"So, are you just now done with the mission then?"

He nodded, leading her across the street to her building. "Came straight here."

Sure enough, he knew exactly which door was hers. When she let them in, she saw a huge bag on her kitchen table.

"You've been in here?" she asked, her brows raised.

"You wanted me to carry a bag filled with guns and ammo around New York looking for you?" Bucky smirked, stepping closer.

"It was a bit of a gamble, wasn't it soldier?" Chris teased, still enjoying the buzz of the alcohol.

He took another step forward. "I knew you'd let me in."

Chris was backed into her couch and it wasn't anything for him to push her back onto it, following her down until she was pinned under a couple hundred pounds of impassioned soldier. His mouth claimed hers a little roughly as he pulled out his jacket, then his shirt. Then he began stripping off the dress she wore, and stitches popped, he wasn't delicate about it.

"I haven't thought about anything else," he whispered hotly in her ear, "except you."

Chris doubted that. Still, she could pretend.

Chris gasped as his lips blazed a path down her neck to her breasts before latching on to one nipple, teasing her with his tongue until all she could do was card her hands into his hair and hang on. The cool metal of his hand slid up her thigh, dragging up her skirt while he insinuated his hips between her thighs.

"I promise I'll take my time with you later," he huffed out, ripping off her best pair of panties in his haste to get what he wanted. His flesh fingers found her desperate for this touch, wet and aching. "I need to be inside you right now."

He could move so fast. One moment rolling on a condom he'd pulled from the pocket of his jeans as he'd shoved them down over his hips, the next he was buried inside her, angling his thrusts so he could find her g-spot. Orgasm rode her as hard and fast as he did, his kisses stealing her breath as she just tried to keep up with him.

"Chris," he whispered in her ear, teasing her clit with his fingers in a way that had her screaming. "That's it. Scream for me, Chris. Give me everything you've got."

Chris came hard and he went on, prolonging it as long as he could.

Bucky was right behind her, growling out as he came, thrust into her powerfully, taking her breath away.

Chris lay stunned beneath him, still buzzed from the alcohol, definitely buzzed from him. One thing was definitely clear to her as they lay there trying to catch their breath.

She had missed him.

He eased off her and that's when she saw the bruises covering his torso, small cuts and wounds.

"You're hurt?" Chris raised a hand to deep looking wound just under his good shoulder.

He took her hand, pressed a kiss to her palm. "It's okay, doll. They'll be gone by tomorrow. I heal quickly."

She groaned as she sat up and he frowned. "You okay, doll baby?"

"I'll be feeling this tomorrow," Chris said with a laugh. "I'm not enhanced like you. But I'll be okay."

Bucky stroked her back, swept a lock of her hair behind her ear. "Sorry I was a jealous punk back there. But you've got to be careful out there, Chris. You know that."

"I'll be fine," she told him, stripping out of what was left of her dress. "Besides, for most intents and purposes, I really don't exist. The FBI likes it that way. No one is looking for me, Bucky."

"You'd be surprised," he said sadly. "I'm sure many people I killed for HYDRA thought the same thing."

Her legs were shaking as she rose from the couch, Bucky's gaze slid over her naked form. The underlying need for her reaching her, making her feel elated and trapped at the same time.

"I'm ready for bed," she said apologetically.

Bucky's expression was deliberately neutral. There was something troubling him, something he wasn't telling her.

"Are you staying?" she wanted to know.

Getting rid of his jeans and shoes, leaving his clothes where they were, Bucky nodded. "Let's get a shower."

Chris walked into the bedroom, fresh from a shower and wearing only a towel wrapped around her slim body. He watched her stop at the table beside her bed, removing her jewelry while his gaze took in all of that creamy, white flesh. Yes, she was slender but there was a grace to her, how she moved, the lines of her body. He'd thought she was beautiful the minute he'd first seen her in the compound.

His face flushed in shame as he stood there watching her, knowing she wasn't aware of his presence yet while Bucky was still in the shower. He shouldn't be standing there ogling her, fighting base desires for a woman who wasn't his.

"Steve," she said, turning to face him. "Do you guys have something against knocking?"

How was she always able to sense him?

She'd tried to sound like she was joking but the way her small hand tightened on the front of the towel, let him know she was nervous.

His heart sank a little. "I'm sorry," he said quietly. "I'm here for Bucky. It would be best not to alert anyone to our presence here."

"I'd guessed that," Chris told him. "Is everything okay?"

There was a softness to her gray eyes when he said his best friend's name. He knew she cared about him and he wanted that for his friend. He wanted Bucky to have someone. Bucky really seemed to care about her too, else he wouldn't be here at the first opportunity he had.

Steve had just not been prepared for the impact that would have on him.

Bucky had been his. Even when he had no one, he'd always had Bucky. When he'd gotten him back, fought for him, Bucky had been so broken. Even after Shuri in Wakanda had gotten rid of the triggers in his mind, Bucky had been a shell of himself, struggling for long months just to get through a normal day.

Slowly, so slowly, he became part of the team, was accepted even by Tony Stark himself which was a small miracle in itself. He knew Bucky was lonely, he came to realize that Bucky would seek out companionship. The type they'd once shared. The type he'd given anything to have with Bucky again.

But loving Steve had gotten Bucky killed, or so he thought for years. Then he found out his lover's fate had been far worse, he'd been turned into the Fist of HYDRA, a killing machine that he and his team struggled to contain when they'd first discovered his identity. And that had been Steve's fault too.

Did he really want to lose the man who meant so much to him again? He couldn't bear it.

Steve had been okay when Bucky brought home the occasional man or woman. None of it seemed personal or particularly special. Many of them had seemed as broken as Bucky himself. Steve had turned a blind eye, wanting whatever Bucky wanted to feel like himself again. Slowly the shadows behind Bucky's eyes began to fade except for odd moments Steve caught him staring at him but he wouldn't let himself stop and think about that.

And then Chris came along, and she'd upended everything.

Bucky was serious about her, endangering the mission in Africa more than once because he was frustrated he couldn't contact her. The end result was that he broke the agreement Steve had made on his behalf. When he joined the Avengers, it was under the condition that Steve could control him. He wouldn't leave the compound. His whereabouts would be known at any given time, Steve would manage him.

And here they were.

Steve didn't blame him. If Chris had gone for him instead, he might have…

No, he stopped himself. He wouldn't have gone for Chris no matter how much he was attracted to her – and he really was. It would have felt like he was betraying Bucky. It was the central reason he kept putting off Sharon each time she came to see him.

"Steve, what the fuck are you doing here?" Bucky growled at him, walking out with a towel wrapped around his hips and glaring at him.

"Why are you here?" Steve asked him. "You know you're supposed to be at the compound. It was part of the agreement."

Chris's eyes moved from Bucky back to Steve. He didn't like the pain he read there.

"Bucky," Chris said softly. "You're not supposed to be here? Then why…"

Bucky shook his head angrily, dropping the towel to the floor before stalking out to the living room for his clothes. Steve followed him there, admiring the view of Bucky he'd been imagining for way too long. Chris stayed where she was. In the quiet of her apartment, it wasn't like she'd be unable to hear what they were saying.

"Really, Steve?" Bucky bit out. "You could've called. But no, you show up here acting like a fucking creep to drag me back to the compound. You couldn't just give me this, could you? Not one fucking night."

The anger in his voice was blistering. Steve knew he deserved it.

"Bucky, I'm sorry about the agreement," Steve's tone had a note of pleading. "It was the only way I could get them to give you some sort of freedom."

"Freedom?" Bucky's voice raised. "From who?"

"What?"

"Why are you really here, Steve?" Bucky challenged him. "Are you here because Ross or Stark called you up? Threatened you until you agreed to drag me back kicking and screaming?"

Well, no. That hadn't happened. Yet. "Bucky –"

"That's what I thought," Bucky sounded bitter. He could see right through Steve. He always could. "So why are you really here?"

Oh, shit. Bucky went there.

"What other reason would I have?" Steve asked, but crumbling inside because he knew he'd been caught.

"Chris," Bucky told him.

That must have had her curiosity up enough that she dropped her towel, pulled her robe from the back of her bathroom door, and wrapped it around herself, padding quietly out to the doorway of her bedroom to see Bucky angrily pulling on his jeans.

"Chris?" Steve wanted to sound as if he were confused. In truth, he was panicking at being confronted on the one subject he worked so hard to avoid.

"Chris." Bucky glared at him, stepping closer. "What's bothering you, Stevie? That I'm with her and you're not?"

Steve felt his face heat up. "Buck, no. I'm happy for you, I –"

"Don't fucking lie to me!" Bucky yelled. "You wanted her when she showed up, same as I did. Admit it!"

Steve looked lost, scrambling to think of any explanation to give his best friend. What was he supposed to say now? That Bucky was right, and he had been attracted to Chris? That he was jealous of her at the same time for laying claim to Bucky's heart?

"No?" Bucky stared him down when he didn't offer an answer. "Then maybe I've got it backward. Maybe you're bothered because she's with me and you aren't."

Steve's anger began to build. "This is not the time and place for this."

"You made it the time and place for this," Bucky told him. "Were you here earlier? Did you see me fuck her?"

"Bucky, stop," Steve growled. "No, I wouldn't do that."

"No, of course not. That's it though, isn't it?" Bucky pulled on his shirt. "You're worried about what people would think. How would it look if Captain America was fucking a man? And not just any man but his pathetic, brain-washed best friend who killed scores of people for HYDRA."

"No, I—"

"You don't want me anymore, but you don't want anyone else to have me? Is that it?" Bucky said in way too calm a voice. "You were okay with my fucking someone here or there. The minute someone else started to matter… and here we are."

"Please show yourselves out when you're done," Chris whispered in a broken voice.

Both men watched as she darted into her bedroom and locked the door. A symbolic move since either of them could easily take down the door if they wanted.

The pain on Bucky's face broke him, made Steve's stomach turn.

Bucky loudly exhaled. "Why couldn't you let me have this? If you're not going to love me, why can't you let me go and find someone who will?"

Having put on his shoes, pulled on his jacket, Bucky snatched his bag from the kitchen table and stormed out the front door to Chris's apartment.

Steve had fucked up. Badly.

Looking back at her door, his heart sank. This wasn't her fault and he truly felt sorry. He knew he should at least try to apologize to her for this. This particular result wasn't at all what he imagined or wanted.

He should apologize but the words stuck in his throat.

Steve left quietly, locking the door behind him.