CHAPTER FOURTEEN
I enter the Chesterfield Suite without even a knock. I look towards the bed, but she isn't there. I wondered if Bella was still lounging around in the bathtub but when I go to investigate, she isn't there either. I walk to her sitting room and still no sign.
I was starting to worry where my love had gone. A part of me frightened that she would renege on her promise and leave me. I went to my room and there she was, a small ball under the covers of on my bed. Filled with relief and then desire. No amount of harsh words from my parents would ruin this now. I go over to the bed and softly call her name and there she is, asleep.
I knew I should wake her. She needed to stay awake a couple more hours in order to get on Caldonian time but she looked so peaceful. Plus, I had unloaded quite a bit on her in a short amount of time. Her body needed the rest. I would deal with her early morning wake up later.
I go to the bathroom and shed my clothes, leaving them on the ground. I brush my teeth and go to find a new pair of boxers to slip on before I head towards the bed. I keep turning around and looking back at Bella in disbelief that she was here. All the nights when I wasn't speaking to her before the Halloween party, I used to fantasize about this. Bella in my bed.
I pull back the covers to climb in and I nearly become undone. I want to wake her immediately. She lies there dressed in a sexy light pink teddy. It seems as if Angela was able to find exactly what I wanted. Once again, I was hard, but I knew I shouldn't wake her. There would be plenty of time for it in the early morning hours when everyone else was asleep and we would surely be awake having gone to bed at nearly six in the evening. I myself was exhausted. Mentally and physically.
I pull her beside me and wrap her in my arms and place a leg over hers. Just feeling her beside me in those soft satin sheets made me horny. I stupidly wonder if she'll have a problem if I just push myself into her wet tight hole and give it a few pumps. It wouldn't take much for me to cum, but I knew that making love to her would be better in the long run.
Instead, I place my hand on her stomach and slowly make soft circles. I want to talk to it and tell him or her that I will always be there. I will love him or her with all my heart and being. I will make their life a happy one. All the promises I would make but he or she can't hear me so instead I make the promises to God.
It takes me longer to fall to sleep as I process the last twenty-four hours. Process the next twenty-four months. I would be a husband. A father and well on my way to preparing to be a proper king. So much has happened in such a short period of time. So much would happen soon in a short period of time.
I finally passed out but when I finally awake once again, Bella is not in my arms or beside me. I jump out of bed and run to the bathroom, but she isn't there.
"Bella!" I call out. I run toward her suite and I see the bathroom light on.
"In here," I hear her faintly say.
I go to the bathroom and she sits on a towel with her head on the toilet.
"I'm sorry. It seems even if my stomach has little to nothing in it, I still end up in the same place. I haven't even vomited but I feel like I'm going to, and I'll be damn if I throw up in your bed twice."
I go over and sit down on the chair across from her.
"Maybe we should eat something. You need to stay healthy and it was my fault. I should have sent for some heavier food options."
"Then I really would have thrown up in your bed," She replied.
"It's okay if you do. At least now I have someone who will clean it for me."
I made the comment knowing how irritated it would make her and it worked. She gave me this look and I laughed out loud feeling accomplished.
"That's why you are here. To put me in my place," I told her.
"Kick your ass if needs be. Even if it earns me a night in the dungeon it would be worth it," she noted.
"I believe that harming a royal member would qualify for the death penalty," I joked.
Bella's eyes widen and once again I laughed.
"It's a joke, Bella. We no longer have the death penalty."
She rolled her eyes and asked me to help her up.
"Why didn't you use my bathroom? It was closer," I asked.
Bella shrugged. "I didn't want to mess it all up just in case this turned into a reprisal of The Exorcist. Thankfully, it didn't."
I walked her back to my room holding her hand.
"I wouldn't have cared."
"Yeah yeah, you have servants again. I know. I know," she placated me.
"Do you want to get something to eat?" I asked.
She looked around and found the clock.
"At two am?" She asked.
"Trust me. I know just the place."
We threw on our robes and headed out my door.
"There aren't as many servants wandering the halls at this hour. Plus, the kitchen staff won't be in for another two hours, so we have the place to ourselves. We can have whatever you wish," I explained taking her down the long corridor and down the steps through another three archways to the South side of the palace. It was the quickest route where I knew we wouldn't run into anyone. If we had run into Bennett, he would feel obligated to report back to my parents especially since Bella and I had missed dinner. I didn't think my parents would be too thrilled to hear about Bella and my late-night shenanigans even if they were pure.
However, it wasn't Bennett who we had to worry about. I skidded to a halt when we walked through the final archway and through the kitchen doors. Bella ran into the back of me and I suddenly felt this overwhelming need to protect her. I held up my hand to block her as I took in the sight of my father sitting on a stool in his royal blue robe with a large sandwich in his hands.
"Father," I said cautiously.
The look on his face was one I was not used to deciphering. Almost apathetic.
"…uh…Isabella, this is my father, His Majesty King Carlisle the…"
My father held up his hand cutting me short.
"I think we can spare the formalities, Edward. Hello, Isabella," he said looking to her.
The way he said her name was not what I had expected. After our confrontation earlier, I was expecting more yelling or at the very least a dirty look.
Bella took a breath before moving from out behind me and replied, "Please to meet you, Your Majesty."
My father smirked and then asked, "Do you know the difference between Your Highness and Your Majesty?"
"Father," I said in warning. Now was not the time for a royal pop quiz.
"I believe that Your Majesty is to refer to the reigning King and Queen, whereas Your Highness refers to the lessor royals," Bella answered without pause. "At least, that's what I read in a book once."
She never failed to amaze me. Jasper would often call me Your Majesty as a sarcastic remark referring to the fact that I was not yet eligible with the title. My father looked pleased and impressed with her knowledge.
"Lessor royals…" My father replied. "I like that."
"What are you doing down here at this hour, father," I asked wanting to move this along.
He looked back to his sandwich and sighed.
"Your mother has won over the staff to her side, I'm afraid. My dinners have become smaller and healthier which has forced me to raid the pantry as if I were no more than a common street rat looking for scraps. I find that this is the only time of night I can have the place to myself. I would ask what you are doing here but from the empty chairs at the table this evening, it doesn't take a genius to know why."
"That would be my fault, Sir. I fell asleep. My body is still catching up to the time change," Bella apologized.
My father looked Bella over with appraisal once more.
"Edward, would you give us a minute?" he asked.
"No! I don't think…" I started to say but Bella placed a firm gentle hand on my arm to stop me.
"It's okay, Edward. I'll be fine."
I hated this. Lord knows what my father was going to say, and it was my job to protect her even if it was from my own parents. I worried that he would upset her enough that she would want to leave. I sighed and mumbled that I would use the restroom and be right back. I made a show of going out the door, but years of practice taught me to eavesdrop on any conversation within these palace walls. Growing up in a royal household caused this to be an imperative skill.
I placed my head at the right point on the door and was able to hear every word, but it seemed as if silence was taking precedence.
"I didn't know. I know you don't believe me but up until two days ago, I really did believe that Edward was just some heir to a Fortune 500 company or something by the way he spoke of you and his duty. I didn't know he was the heir to a throne. If I had…things would have turned out very differently."
Bella would be the first to speak. Knowing her, she wasn't about to let a person get the first word in, royal or otherwise. It did sadden me a little at her confession, however. Would she have really have not given me a chance if she would have found out sooner?
I heard my father sigh before he replied, "I didn't want him to go to America. Lately I could see how much he wanted different things. I was worried that outside influences would try and change his views on his responsibilities. I thought that travelling to America would cause him to never come back."
"Sir, I can tell you that Edward since I met him was tortured with…his loyalties. He felt guilty for wanting something different but knew where his place was ultimately. He knew what he had to do but…don't you think it would be better for Edward to succeed you because he wanted to and not because he felt he had to?" Bella asked.
I couldn't believe how brave my girl was being. Speaking to the king as if she were speaking to any common person.
"I was angry when he told us today about your…condition. Of course, for the obvious reasons that I'm sure any parent would feel but also because of what this would mean to our positions in the country. However, Edward the son I sent off is not the son who returned to me. My son has always had issues in the past with running away from problems. Today, I saw a man who was willing to face them. He is the kind of man I had hoped would rule Caldonia after my demise. But, you are the wild card. There is a reason why the royal family marries from a particular pool of people. You know very little of our traditions and expectations. I know of what you will have to learn in order to have hope of becoming a productive member of this family but more importantly, I know what you will have to give up. We can't have weakness. We can't have a person come only so far and find that our way of life is not for her. If you decided to leave…it would be a far greater scandal than a child born out of wedlock and I am afraid it would weaken my son and his duties to his country."
"I am here as long as Edward wants me here. I am overwhelmed to say the least. I asked Edward to have patience with me because this is…unlike anything I ever imagined for my life, but I love Edward. I want to see him be a good king too but more importantly, I want him to be a good person," Bella replied.
"You are…an intelligent woman, I can see. Don't be overwhelmed. Contrary to what you may think, we don't want to see you fail."
I feel my heart tighten at my father words.
"Well…Edward is more intelligent than I am, annoying so most of the time, so have faith in him," Bella said.
"My son is smart…but not nearly as much as you give him credit. He still believes that we don't see through his charades. That we can't see his truths."
My heart stops. Did my father mean that he knew that Bella's baby wasn't mine?
"…like the fact that he hides behind doors and takes part in conversations not meant for his ears."
I feel myself breathe a sigh of relief before walking back in, caught. Bella looks at me in surprise with a hint of admonishment. She slowly shakes her head and scoffs.
"Well, I think I've had enough caloric intake my body can handle for one day. Isabella. Edward. Good evening."
With the swish of his robe, he was up and out the door. I breathe a sigh of relief before I feel Bella smack me in the arm.
"You are childish. I had it handled," She scolded me.
"I…am very impressed. Yes, you did," I replied taking her in my arms. "Now, we need to eat so that we have enough energy for what I have planned next."
Bella gave me a look and shook her head.
"You think you are so smooth, Edward," She pushed me off and went towards the refrigerator. One of four refrigerators.
"So…what are you planning to make for me?" She asked.
I looked around a little worried. My time in Washington had led to me cooking for myself very basic meals.
"Grilled cheese?" I asked.
Bella nodded, "That…sounds doable."
She perched herself up on the stool that my father was sitting on only moments before and waved her hand indicating that I should get started.
"Not going to help me out at all, are you?" I asked.
"Oh Edward…I would love to but there are far too many sharp pointy items in here that my clumsy damsel in distress self could possibly hurt herself on."
I couldn't help myself. I walked over to her and settled myself between her legs.
"I know of something pointy that you would not hurt yourself on if you would oblige," I said grinding myself on her.
"Edward!" Bella pushed me in disbelief. "What has gotten into you?"
"It's been over forty-eight hours for starters. Bella, we waited over three months. Do you have any idea how much lost time that I want to make up for?"
Once again, she shook her head in disbelief.
"Well, I think you will need to wait a little longer. For one it would be incredibly unsanitary to do that in here. I don't need to worry that the food I eat here will someday have a rouge pube in it. Plus, like I said before, our sex life will be forced to remain within the walls of our room from now on, I'm afraid."
"Thank you for such a descriptive visual," I replied cringing at the thought.
I knew she was correct and I should be happy that Bella was already adjusting her expectations, but it didn't help that I could think of nothing else since arriving here. I would need to make this meal quick.
I returned to the stove and began pulling items out that I would need.
"I know I may be pushing my luck with this request when I have so glaringly been failing at my duties to keep you satisfied but…do you think there would be any way we could go and see the palace before people began to wake up or come in to work?" She asked.
I looked back at her while my pan heated up.
"Of course, we can…Bella I'm not unhappy with you. You're not failing at anything. My apologies. I have had a hard time focusing on the important issues. I think if we were to make love just once, then maybe I can stop with my pushiness."
I felt like an incredible dick.
Bella pushed herself off the stool and she tripped falling into my arms. Thankfully I caught her, and it took everything in me to keep my frustration at bay.
"I know what you're going to say…" She started.
"You're like a walking disaster. I might need to assign someone full time to you if you keep going like this."
Bella sighed and turned around to go and sit on a different chair, one that wasn't so high up in the air. I turned back to the sandwich I was making and focused on that, but my mind was inundated with notions of all the places Bella was going to fall or trip over. It was driving me crazy. How could one person be so accident prone? Did she not have any regard for her own well-being to focus on putting one foot in front of the other?
I brought the sandwich over to her and she slowly started to eat it as I went back to cook another for myself. I could feel the tension in the air as she hadn't said one word to me. I knew I was going to have to be the one to let it go but I was just so irritated.
"I'm going to go back to my room. I'm not feeling well," Bella said when I sat down beside her at the small table.
I could already feel the fight coming. With Bella I felt as if I were a storm watcher. Able to predict when a hurricane was set to land.
"You can wait five minutes for me to finish," I said.
"Don't worry about it. I paid attention. Through the archways and up the stairs, down the corridor," She said standing up.
"That's not the point. I don't you want you magically falling on something."
"Well, I imagine that it would be better than blowing chunks all over some priceless portrait. Somehow, I'm sure that would be my fault as well."
She began to walk toward the exit and I grabbed my plate to follow along after her.
"You know Edward…this isn't something exactly new that you learned about me since we arrived here. My lack of coordination I'm sure is baffling to someone with likes you but some of us weren't given the gift of athleticism," she snapped as we climbed the stairs.
"What is that supposed to mean?" I asked.
She stopped and spun around. "I saw all your trophies and ribbons. Polo, fencing and rowing crew. Lucky you…you have brains and brawn, some of us lessor people weren't gifted with such talents."
She turned back around and headed down the corridor. I was slightly impressed that she did indeed know the way back to our room. However, with her accusations, I found I had little time to be impressed with her attitude.
"Would you please stop talking like that. I know you're only saying it to piss me off," I snapped as we entered The Chesterfield Suite.
She turned back around and stared at me. With the smallest shake of her head she let out a small scoff.
"So, you're the only one who gets to be pissed off in this relationship? I just want to get this expectation of me down. It would help if you could provide some sort of Royal Pain in My Ass manual."
Now I was thoroughly pissed.
"I'll be sure to pick one up. Right along with my copy of how to deal with an ignorant brat!"
"Chapter one. Fuck you!" She shouted.
She turned around and went to the bathroom slamming the door behind her.
I felt my blood boiling. I hated the way she would talk down of my way of life. I wanted to leave her to cool down, feeling as if I should do the same but Bella and I would need to come to a basic understanding quickly if we were going to survive. My father said he was proud that I wasn't running from my problems so now it was up to me to continue with that expectation. It wasn't like Bella and I hadn't had our share of fiery arguments. I often thought it was one of the reasons we were so passionate with one another. We had passion making love. We had passion when we would share with one another and we definitely had passion when we were angry.
I sat on the bed waiting for her to be brave enough to face me. The half hour it took for her to come out gave me a chance to reflect and figure out what I was going to say. I was not going to merely roll over and apologize. She had much to apologize for as well.
She came out with her eyes red from the obvious crying she had done. I remained sitting with my arms crossed. She stood there staring at me and I at her.
"Are you ready to talk?" I asked.
Bella sighed and looked away.
"I'm exhausted, Edward. You can…win this one if you like. I don't care," She went over to the bed and pulled back the covers climbing in slowly.
"No, that's not how this works. You and I need to deal with this now. It is apparent that you are still very much upset with me for dropping all of this on you, but I want us to deal with it now because I will not keep having this argument. It isn't healthy for you. For this baby. For our relationship and I love you far too much to let anything stand in our way."
I stood up and went over to sit down beside her as she laid in bed looking despondent.
"I need to know what you're thinking," I pressed.
She sighed once again and still refused to look at me.
"I am thinking a great many things," She replied.
"Okay, let's start from the beginning of your list."
She took a minute before answering me.
"The truth, Bella," I said pushing her for honesty.
"I…am still angry with you for throwing me into all of this. You should have prepared me. I hate myself for lashing out at you. I know I am being an…ignorant brat. I feel out of control with my emotions; hormonal. I feel like I am not in control of my own life. I feel scared. I don't belong. And mostly…I feel as if this were all a big mistake."
I took a deep breath in and exhaled. Her words scared me. I kept telling myself that it was because everything was new, and she just needed to give it some time but even I knew how wrong it was for myself to have such high expectations when she knows nothing of this life.
"Do you want to go home?" I asked quietly and my heart stopping to await the answer.
She looked at me for the first time as if searching for something.
"Do you want me to go?" She whispered.
"No!" I stated emphatically. "I want you to be happy however."
She began to cry again and this time, I couldn't allow myself not to care. I hated seeing her cry. The person I love should never have to endure pain that would cause it. I pulled her into my arms and held her tightly.
"I'm sorry," I apologized first even though I didn't want to. In the end, if you love someone, you would do anything, even if it meant swallowing your pride.
"No…I'm sorry. You were right I was being a brat, but I just get so mad," She sobbed.
"No honey…there is never a reason for it to be okay for me to call you names. I need to be a better person and even if I am mad, figure out a better way to work through my anger. You have had a lot to process in a very short amount of time and I'm afraid that if the situation were reversed, I would have handled it far worse than you."
Bella nuzzled into my chest more and wiped her face with her hand to spare me tears on my robe.
"What are we going to do, Edward. You and I…we just have a way of coming at one another that scares me. Scares me because it's only a matter of time before one of us is done,"
"We have to be honest with each other. Honestly, it upsets me when you say things about this…life. I was raised here. This is the only life I have known. I know it may sound silly and I don't mind it when we are making fun with one another but when you use it as a weapon in our fights, it really upsets me."
I feel her nod her head on my chest.
"Now you go. Please tell me how I upset you."
She pushes back from me and sits with a little distance from me. I can see her preparing what she wants to say. I just want her to be honest. I didn't want her thinking she had to sugar coat anything for my benefit.
"Before…when you were just Edward…before we were even hanging out," She paused. "I didn't think I was good enough for you. You were so smart and…handsome. You obviously came from a wealthy background. Even after we started dating, I kept thinking…how was I so lucky to have caught your eye," She said barely holding herself together.
"…and now after finding out about all of this…I know I'm not good enough and I hate feeling like that. Every time you do something or say something about my clumsy nature…you make me feel less than. And on top of it, you get mad at me for it. Like it something so easily controlled but…if it was, do you really think that it is something I do on purpose? Like, I like getting hurt?"
I was completely blown away at her confession. I never knew she felt this way. She never once made me think that she felt inferior.
"I had no idea…but that's just silly. I mean…you're amazing, Bella. I am constantly amazed by you. How could you ever feel that you weren't good enough for me? Hello? I lied to you for over three months on my true identity so how exactly does that make me better?"
"Well…I mean…now I kind of think I am better than you," Bella kidded.
Her soft smile brought a smile to my face and I knew we would be all right.
Bella looked at me once again and cringed slightly.
"I am sorry for what I said earlier. I...will try and not use your position as a weapon any more. I'm sorry for that…but you are far too good at debate. I feel as if it were my only card to play sometimes."
I pull her to me, "You have no idea just how many cards you have to play. You need to think outside the box. You could get me to declare war on…Germany with the power you hold over me," I kiss her softly and I feel her place a hand on my cheek.
"Are we done fighting?" She asked.
"I think so," I replied.
"Good," She laughs softly and jumps up to straddle my lap. "Then let's see what card I can play now."
She grinds herself on me and like I said, I would declare war if only she asked. I flip her over and pull down her lacy panties and prepare to worship my perfect woman but then something finally stops me when I realize what I nearly did.
I jump up and Bella looks at me as if I lost my mind. With ease I pick her up and run to carry her toward my room.
"I told you that I wanted my bed to be the first place we made love,"
"Oh god," She mumbles under her breath irritated but I don't care. I am finally going to have my dream realized.
AN: THANK YOU FOR TAKING THE TIME TO READ AND REVIEW. FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO ARE OR HAVE READ LOATHING YOU, I PROMISE ONCE THIS IS DONE, I WILL FINISH IT. I HAVE WRITTEN 20 CHAPTERS OF THIS SO FAR AND FORESEE IT BEING FINISHED BY 30 SO HOPEFULLY I WILL BE DONE WITH THIS BY THE END OF OCTOBER AND CAN RETURN TO LOATHING YOU BY NOVEMBER. THANK YOU FOR YOUR LOYALTY TO MY STORIES!
DISCLAIMER: STORY IS MINE. CHARACTERS BELONG TO STEPHENIE MEYER.