CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
A girl. A girl. Bella was right. I felt relief course through me. This baby might not ever have to take the throne and therefore be a false heir. We could make a boy. Good Lord, I wouldn't mind all the attempts it would take to make a male heir.
I had no idea just how much the gender of this baby was weighing on me. I knew I could handle perpetuating the lie if needs be but to now know we had options, I was lighter for the news. Now that I could no longer worry about the right and wrong of the bloodline, I could allow myself to dream about my daughter. To see a beautiful long brown hair doll come running into my arms and laugh as I twirled her around in the air. To protect her from all the gentleman suitors that would surely line up for her and know that they would never be good enough. To walk her down the aisle when she was finally able to convince me someday that the man she had chosen was worthy. I had so many dreams and with my work going well, I couldn't imagine myself being any happier than I was then.
Out of the first trimester, we flew and happier for it. Bella no longer would get sick at the sight of certain food items. In fact, she seemed to be finally picking up her food intake which filled me with relief. We were to have our second doctors meeting the morning before Saint Valentine's Ball. Dr. Molina assured us that it would be super quick and easy. He would just need to check her heartbeat and then he ended it by giving Bella a lecture on safe weight gain before taking her blood once again before we left.
Bella stood in front of the mirror with her blouse pulled up as she looked at her changing body. Her stomach did protrude, and it was a good thing we would be announcing our engagement officially that Saturday because I worried how long we could hold off on telling people about our happy surprise. There had been a lot of speculation in the local newspapers of our engagement since our outing to the street fair. I tried to keep Bella from it since she was happily staying to the palace, but I was sure Rosalie would have shared with her.
"Why are you sucking in your stomach? You should be proud of your ever-growing bump. I know I am," I said walking toward her and snaking my arm around her waist.
Bella spent little time in the Chesterfield Suite these days. The only time she would go there is to get something from the closet. I didn't know if she was still upset about my past and the ladies I had set up there before, but I wasn't about to open up that wound if I was wrong. I hoped that she was spending time in my room because she wanted to be near me and no other reason. Perhaps it was time to speak with my parents on our living conditions and push up the move.
"I am. However, maybe if I do this the next time we meet with Dr. Molina, perhaps he will be won't give me a cross eye on my weight gain." She took another deep breath in and flattened her stomach as much as she could. I poked her in the side to get her to inflate.
"He wasn't upset with your weight gain. He just wanted to give you the healthy parameters to stay within. It's his job to be concerned."
Through the mirror, her eyes stared me down.
"Healthy parameter?" She asked with the rise of an eyebrow. "I'm about to push a very large item out of a very small hole, you really want to tell me there is a parameter I should stay within?"
I sighed and released her with caution.
"I'm going to be shutting my mouth now," I said backing away.
"Ah...he is a wise prince," She teased.
I looked around hoping to find inspiration for a quick topic change. I spy her book on the side table and the notorious list that laid top side.
"So, have you thought any more on what my mother said?" I asked.
Bella looked at me staring at the list and let go of her blouse to walk towards the bed. She picked up the list and flopped down on the bed.
"I don't know. There are some lovely names on here but to be honest, I feel like I lost the right to be able to name my own child by choosing one. I don't mean any disrespect to you or your family or tradition. I just…"
"No," I quickly jump in to help alleviate her guilt. "I know you're not being disrespectful. I'm sorry. I know I have a lot of baggage that you didn't even realize you were signing up for when you trusted yourself to get on that plane to come here."
"Thank you for...hearing me."
I pulled her to me and leaned down to kiss her.
"How about we pretend this list does not exist and pretend that once again we are just Edward and just Bella. Making this decision as if we were normal people. What names did you have in mind?" I asked.
Bella sighed and looked away.
"What's the point? We are not normal...we don't get a choice. In the end, we just have to suck it up."
It was unusual for her to be the pessimistic one. Usually, she would leave that role for me to play. She sat looking over the list while she pulled and twirled a lock of her wavy brown hair. I sat down beside her and decide to try and bring her out of her reverie.
"It is a good thing we aren't having a boy. You should hear the names I had in mine. I for one always liked the name, Zeus."
"ZEUS," She exclaimed. "God, maybe I should be happy there is a list we have to go from. Imagine, Prince Zeus? That poor kid never had a chance."
I laughed and am happy that I was able to get her mind off the torment of the dreaded list.
"What name would you have chosen for a boy?" I asked.
Bella pretends to think on it and then she bites her lip holding back a smile.
"Personally, I would have loved to follow in the Michael Jackson tradition and name him Prince. Then he would be Prince Prince. Oh my, could you just imagine Rosalie's face?" She said continuing with our game.
"That's a good one. Okay, well if we were able to choose any name, I would want to name our girl, Peach. Princess Peach."
Bella looks at me stunned. "You know video games?"
"Of course, just because I am a prince doesn't mean I was completely cut off from the world."
Bella looks back down at the list and sighed. I pull it out of her hands and fold it up, placing in my pocket.
"Look, we don't have to worry about this for a few more months but my point is, maybe we pick a name off the list and maybe we don't. Maybe we should just be happy with our daughter and be excited about her impending arrival."
Bella stood up from the bed and waved her hands about.
"I'm sorry, I think I am just nervous about this ball tomorrow. You should see the dress they are putting me in. I don't know how I will manage to walk let alone dance in the stupid thing. I swear Rosalie picked it so that I would fall on my face."
"As much as I would love to blame Rosalie, I am pretty sure my mother picked it out. But do not fear, for I will be on your arm the entire evening and would never let you fall. I have faith that you will do just fine. We are going to this dance lesson, so it will give you a little less to worry about tomorrow evening."
I had agreed to spend my afternoon with Bella and Rosalie as she instructed Bella how to properly dance for our opening. No amount of assurances from me would calm her nerves. She just needed to see me take the lead and then hopefully it would quell her fears.
Bella placed her hand on her stomach and looked as if she needed to hold back some bile.
"You have no idea how I am dreading this. God! Why couldn't you just be poor! No silly balls or duchess who get uppity over their titles. No stupid dances…tabloids or lessons. I could be cozy in a bed, curled up with a mighty thick book. Stupid ball!"
"Bella," I pulled her to me. "Please calm down, honey. I hate that you are putting yourself through all this stress. It isn't good for you or our baby. Please."
I see her marginally calm as she takes deep breaths.
"I know it is just a silly ball but…this is not what I excel at. I am so out of my comfort zone. I know I should just suck it up and go to this stupid lesson and be a sponge but my whole body and mind are screaming at me to grab my passport and jump the next plane to anywhere but here."
I bristled at her words.
"By the way, where is my passport? I have no idea where it went since we came here," She wondered.
"Uh…"
I felt my heart begin to race. Seeing the look on my face, Bella narrowed her eyes at me.
"Oh geez, did you burn it? Some sort of insurance policy that I can't leave?"
"NO!" I shake my head and sighed. "I had them put it in the safe. We keep all important documents in a safe on site."
Bella took a step back from me and chewed on her lip.
"I'm not trying to hold you, hostage," I begin. "I know that keeping your passport wouldn't stop you if you truly wanted to leave. It's a safety measure to put all that kind of information under supervision."
Bella nodded her head.
"Then…can I have it back?" She asked.
I hated her question because I would love more than anything to say no but I know I can't so instead I attempt for misdirection.
"Are you really that scared of this ball? Because I would rather we not go at all then for you to feel the need to flee. In fact, if you never wanted to leave these walls again, I would be all too happy to levy taxes on the good people on rebuilding the palace to accommodate your needs," I said.
"You didn't even want to levy the taxes to pay for your parliament building restoration. Now you want to take out my fears on the good people of Caldonia?" She inquired.
I pull her to me once more. "I would do anything to keep you happy or haven't you figured that out yet? Who cares about a couple of percent increase if it will keep my fiancé happy?"
Bella pushed me off her and slapped my chest lightly.
"Let them eat cake, huh? I don't believe that worked so well last time," She said with the roll of her eyes. "That is the stupidest thing I have heard come out of your mouth and believe me when I say, that's a feat. Stop screwing around and let's just get this dancing lesson over with," she huffed.
She turned around and marched toward the door. I felt relief wash through me as my plan had worked to keep her mind off the passport. I follow along after feeling triumphant but as Bella gets to the door she turns back around quickly.
"And I do want my passport back. You didn't really think that was going to work, did you?" She asked with a challenging eye.
I sighed and slowly shook my head and motioned for her to go on. How ignorant was I to think I could get away with my silly plan? I would need to return her passport back to her and hope that she wouldn't have the need to use it without my knowledge. But with the way things were going, if I could get us through this ball with success then maybe I could show Bella that her worst fears weren't warranted and that she could do this.
I was thankful that Alice had decided to not return to the United States. Instead, she enrolled at a college in Odesa using the connections she had to be accepted quickly, connections meaning me. I told Bella that she too could finish her education, but she said she would think about it after the baby arrived. Alice moved in with Jasper and would come by when she was able to get a break from school. Emmett, however, returned to his home and it seemed that his absence made Rosalie even more of a bear than before, if that was at all possible.
When we walked into the ballroom there were about twenty workers preparing it for the next evening. Metal gold hearts were being hung along with the gold drapes being taken down and replaced with regal red. The floors had already been polished and Rosalie stood in the middle of the room waiting for us looking dissatisfied.
"You're late!" She snapped. She threw the dress in her hands at Bella and my Bella being uncoordinated was unable to stop the assault.
"I thought my dress was pink," Bella said.
"This is a practice dress. You didn't really think I was going to give you the real dress so that you would mess it up before tomorrow? Put it on quickly and there are some heels for you over there. Hurry up!" Rosalie ordered.
I followed Bella over to the side where a chair was waiting for her.
"Is it just me or is Rosalie even more of a pill than she usually is?" I murmured under my breath.
"She's in love. That's the only reason I tolerate it. She takes her frustration out on me," Bella replied. "Don't worry, I have a plan."
"With Emmett?" I asked perplexed.
Bell nodded.
"I told you they were in love. I swear you never listen to me."
"But, if she were in love, wouldn't you think she would…I don't know, be nice? Happy?"
"She doesn't know she is in love. She doesn't want to believe it. She is fighting her feelings which is causing her to be stressed. Plus, it doesn't help that tomorrow night all of Caldonia will be celebrating true love while she is stuck here, and her love is halfway around the world. Wouldn't you be bitter?"
Bella clasped the closure on the heels and stood up with a little wobble. She wasn't kidding when she said she wasn't used to walking in heels. I too became worried about tomorrow evening. When I said I would be on her arm the entire evening, I never imagined that I would need to be on her arm the entire evening. Bella slid the dress over her clothes and I zipped her into the ball gown. Now there was a three-foot radius around her. I took her arm and wrapped mine around it and walked slowly back to the middle of the room.
"Finally," Rosalie huffed. "So, first Uncle Carlisle will address the room and say something along the lines of our deadbeat son has finally managed to locate his arm decoration for life, please welcome Prince Edward and his betrothed, Isabella Swan as they share their first dance. May they live long and birth many male children who I am sure, they too will live up to the family bloodline."
I gave Bella a dirty look, but she shook her head silently asking me to forget it.
"Then Bella, hold out your hand like so," Rosalie continued modeling just how Bella was to extend her hand to me. "Edward will take your hand in his and you will walk straight and proper to the center of the room."
Bella and I did just as Rosalie instructed.
"Then Edward will let go and turn to you, and you will turn to him. You will give your formal curtsey and Edward bows," Rosalie said with boredom lacing her words.
"Edward will come to you and you will hold your frame just so."
Rosalie positioned Bella exactly how she wanted her, and I walked forward and took her hand in mine and placed my hand on her hip, the enormous ball gown filing in between us. Bella looks up into my eyes shyly and I can see her nerves dancing around in them. I offer her a small reassurance and tighten my grip on her as I move to the first step. Bella goes with me but slightly falls and I manage to keep her up and in place.
"You have to relax. Allow me to do the work," I said.
"Relax? When there are going to be hundreds of people watching us and I'm in heels that I can hardly walk in. Relax he says," She muttered looking down.
"DON'T LOOK DOWN!" Rosalie barked.
"Go easy on her," I snapped.
"Easy? You have a little over a day to get this down. Easy was for last month. Now is not the time for babying," Rosalie replied.
I try once again turning my burning eyes of loathing away from Rosalie and try to remain calm for Bella. I let go of Bella's hand and bring it up to her chin.
"Eyes on me. This is your frame. No matter what happens, you keep your eyes on me. Don't even look at anyone else in the room. They are not here. It is just you and me. No one else. I will keep you up and we will get this down, even if we are here all night."
I pull her tightly to me, smashing her dress a little but I knew it would help me keep her steady by doing so.
"Again," Rosalie nagged.
We went about it for an hour and Bella was no further along. Rosalie's insults were harsher the longer we went. I could see Bella's self-confidence losing the battle. So finally, I yelled at Rosalie to leave us. Bella wasn't the kind of person that you screamed at to get her to perform. She needed all the self-confidence she could get, and cruel criticism wasn't going to cut it.
Of course, Rosalie didn't go without a fight so when our screaming match was over, I found Bella sitting off to the side with her head in her hands.
"I need the room!" My word echoed thought out the ballroom. Every worker stopped what they were doing. They gave each other looks but had the good sense to leave behind their work and exit. I was sure they were already on a tight deadline, but I didn't care. The only thing that mattered was my love. I could see her wipe tears away as I slowly approached.
Without looking up at me she said, "I think I need my passport."
I instantly knelt before her and took her hands in mine.
"Bella," I began to say.
"God, Edward. I feel so defeated and it's over something so stupid! I hate failing and I am failing miserably. I'm never going to have this down before tomorrow. I'm just…not coordinated for this and no matter how hard you hold me, I'm going to make you look ridiculous."
"Stop it, right now. Okay? I'm not going to come to your pity party. You're Isabella Swan! You can do anything. You don't let failure get in your way. I have known this since the moment we met. You take responsibility for every action. You have the patience of a saint. You are my hero, Bella. You can do this and I'm not going to allow you to be like me and run from your fears."
She didn't respond. She just kept sniffling and trying to hold back her tears. I looked down and sighed.
"Here, let me see your feet," I said pulling her dress up and revealing the heels that she was wearing.
I began to take them off, unfastening their straps and tossing them to the side.
"This is too much. Learning to walk properly in heels and dance was too much to put on your plate so let's take one thing away."
"I can't go to this ball in flats, Edward," She scoffed.
"Why not? Your dress is going to touch the floor. No one will ever know even if you were to wear tennis shoes."
"Rosalie is going to have a fit," She replied.
"Leave Rosalie to me and if this gives you the confidence you need, then that is all that matters to me. No more talking about passports. You know that bothers me, right?" I chastised.
Her eyes seemed to find anywhere to look but mine, but I wasn't going to allow it, so I took ahold of her chin and made her focus on me.
"You're going to make me do something that will greatly upset my mother if you don't get back out on that dance floor," I threatened.
Bella shook her head slightly in wonder as to what I meant.
"Well…if you keep threatening me with passports than I will fight fire with fire. If you don't continue with me right now, I will come to the ball tomorrow wearing tennis shoes myself. Big white, can't miss them, tennis shoes. If you think Rosalie has anger, you haven't seen my mother when she gets going. Plus, my father has a heart condition so no telling what that will do to him…"
"Alright!" Bella shouted standing up quickly.
I took her hand and followed her back to the middle of the floor. She straightened her posture and stood in perfect form.
"You're mean when you blackmail," she muttered.
"It wasn't blackmailed…it was an incentive," I corrected.
"You sure do seem oblivious to the proper definition."
"Stop stalling and get dancing Swan or I will make sure that tennis shoes aren't the only thing that will go awry with my formal wear tomorrow evening."
We spent hours practicing. I did let the staff in after an appropriate amount of time because I hoped that their presence would give Bella a small taste of what it would be like when we were finally doing our dance and the number of eyes she would have on her.
The next afternoon, Angela had a team in our suite to work on Bella's hair and makeup. I pulled my clean white tennis shoes from out of the closet and set them on the bed as a reminder. When Bella was presented to me I nearly lost my balance. Her team was gone, and it was just the two of us.
Bella stood fidgeting with her fingers unable to look in my direction. Her dress was a sleeveless soft pink chiffon ball gown with intricate work on the bodice. She swallowed and took the courage to find my eyes. My mouth seemed unable to close, just spread in awe at the sight of her.
"Bella…you are magnificent. Beautiful could never begin to describe how lovely you are."
She pressed her lips together and shrugged slightly.
"Fit for a prince?" She asked quietly.
I took her in my arms.
"No. This prince could never be worthy," I replied. I leaned down to kiss her, but she pulled back instantly.
"You'll mess up my lipstick."
So instead I leaned down and kissed her neck. She moaned in appreciation and tilted her head to allow for more.
"If we can't even mess with your lipstick, I doubt sex is an option right now," I said.
I pulled back and she placed her hands on my chest.
"Okay, fine. We'll wait until later but don't take this off when we come back. I want to do that," She replied huskily.
I groaned. Damn this stupid ball.
We walk through the palace hand in hand passing guards as we go. When we would have an event of this magnitude in our home, we would station extra guards around to discourage wayward guests from going in areas they do not belong. It was nearly time for our debut. We were required to be at the personal entrance to the ballroom at exactly eight pm.
I feel Bella's hand growing tense as we come closer to our final destination. I stop her before we go any further wanting one more solitary moment. I place myself in front of her and let out a breath I had been holding.
"What's wrong?" She asked softly.
"I have something for you," I said. I searched for the item in my inner coat pocket and hand her the soft rectangular object.
"This is…your chance. If you really don't want to do this…I will respect your wishes."
Bella looked at the passport that I had presented to her.
"This is really messed up that you're giving me this now," she said.
"I need to know. And I think…you need to know too. Because this isn't going to be the last ball we attend. And you once told me that I needed to figure out what I wanted. Whether I wanted to be king or not. Now I need to know whether you want this or not."
Bella bit her lip and then said, "No turning back after this."
I didn't respond but yes, that was the intended insinuation.
Bella took the passport and attempted to tear it apart.
"Damn, they make these things indestructible." She cringed pulling at it.
I reached out and grabbed her hands and smiled at her relieved.
"Don't tear it. We'll need it for our honeymoon, but I completely love the show of solidarity."
"Right," Bella replied and then looked down at her passport. "I know I've been kind of a pill these last few days about this ball. I'm sorry. I just want so much to not disappoint you. I could never…"
"Bella," I gasped cupping her face in my hands. "You will never disappoint me. I love you more and more every single day. I can't wait to marry you and not because in the back of my mind I feel that it's a way to keep you here but because I want so badly to call you my wife. To make love to my wife. To be prepared to share a lifetime of happy memories with you. Even if this night doesn't go as planned, nothing is going to change that for me."
I go to the pocket and pull out the necklace I had picked out special for this occasion. A Harry Winston original diamond necklace with a single ruby heart in the middle of the wreath. Since coming home it was the first big purchase I had made. I felt a tad guilty knowing that the cost of it alone could pay a large portion for renovations for the Veritas Plaza. But this was a special occasion and I wanted to give Bella something to reward her endless love and faith in me.
"Oh god, I can't wear that," Bella gasped. She looked faintly nauseous, but I didn't listen, and I walked around her and placed the necklace on her smooth soft neck.
"So, you were only going to give this to me if I stayed?" She asked lightly touching the large stone.
"No, if you planned to leave I was going to try and buy you off," I replied.
We laughed together, and I could see her visibly relax.
"Alright, my princess. You ready?" I asked holding out my hand to her.
"You just jinxed the whole damn thing," She teased.
"Before the year is over, we will be married and have a daughter. You will be a princess. I wasn't jinxing us. I was merely stating a fact," I argued.
"Whatever, Your Majesty," She grumbled.
I took her hand and we walked on prepared for what was next.
AN: Thank you for reviewing and reading.
Story is mine. Characters belong to Stephenie Meyer.