A/N: I wanted to say thanks for the favorites, bookmarks, and reviews. They've really encouraged me to keep working on this. I hope y'all enjoy it!"

*

What did you just say to me?" Dean asked in a low but dangerous voice.

Iris swallowed against the fear that had bubbled up in response to Dean's quiet anger. Shit. I have to convince him to listen to me. He might be too angry to listen. She couldn't look at Dean, so she talked to her hands. "You probably think I'm lying. But I am one of the souls you tortured in Hell. I know I was one of the early ones, because Alastair was there. He was-"

"Bullshit!" Dean yelled, cutting her off. Iris looked up, surprised into looking at him with his outburst. Dean's face was red with rage. He jumped up from the couch. "I'm not listening to this," he growled, starting to stalk off.

"Wait, please! I'm not saying this to hurt you!" Iris cried. She began to stand up as well and desperately grabbed Dean's wrist to keep him from leaving.

Dean turned back and slapped Iris's arm away with his other hand. A resounding smack rended the air.

Iris cried out and dropped back down onto the couch. She clutched her arm to her chest.

Dean stared at her with wide eyes, all color draining from his face. "Oh God, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have…. Are you hurt? I can't believe I just-"

Iris waved the uninjured arm in a dismissive gesture, but it was slightly undercut when that hand returned to rubbing her smarting forearm. "No, I'm fine, I shouldn't have grabbed you. I got physical first, so it's my fault, really."

"But I-" Dean began to splutter.

"Please, Dean, I'm all right." Iris was able to meet Dean's gaze now. She held it as she continued, "Will you sit back down and hear me out? Please?" Iris kept her voice gentle. "Honestly, I'm not trying to hurt you."

"I don't see how you'd think you could tell me that and not hurt me," Dean replied, but his voice was sad and tired now. He sat back down, his posture less tense and more defeated. It seemed the fire of his anger had gone right out.

"I guess I knew it would hurt at first, but I'm hoping we can help each other out. I feel guilty about what I did in Hell, and I'm guessing you still do, too, even after all these years." It seemed as though Dean would try to deflect or deny it, but Iris was surprised when he looked up to the ceiling and started blinking rapidly. He gave her a curt nod.

"Despite my best efforts not to think about it," Iris continued, "the back of my mind has been working overtime on the subject. And here's the thing: everyone breaks, Dean. Everyone takes the deal eventually." Iris stopped rubbing her arm and returned her hands to her lap. This isn't even going to bruise… it mostly just surprised me.

Dean's lips pursed and his eyebrows came together in disagreement. "But my father-"

"As it happens," Iris cut in, "I know something about that. I got close to someone who knew way more than he had any right to. And John Winchester was a special case... because he didn't have a brother."

Dean looked at Iris in confusion. "Come again?"

"John Winchester was someone who some thought could have broken the First Seal, but he didn't, because he didn't have an equal opposite to play Lucifer. My contact thought, and I agree, that Fate, or God, or whatever, was at work here, and it was always going to be brother versus brother, a mirror image to the angelic brothers."

Dean's eyes widened in understanding. "You mean…?"

"John Winchester couldn't have said yes any more than you could have said no forever. Because if he had said yes, it would have undone the First Seal, and that just didn't fit into the narrative. Remember, Heaven and Hell were working together to bring about the Apocalypse. Heaven specifically waited until after you said yes to rescue you because they wanted you to break the Seal. And Hell let them rescue you because it was necessary for you to be Michael's vessel, even if the grunts on the ground didn't know that."

Dean's eyes were far away as he thought for a moment. But then he focused on Iris again and sighed. "Okay, but that still doesn't excuse… I mean… I'm… like you, I…" Dean took a deep breath and looked away to the floor. "I liked it."

"Did you ever think that maybe you didn't have any more choice in that than you did on whether or not to take the deal in the first place? The sheer relief of not being tortured anymore is heady stuff, but there's also the fact that Hell has been in the business of rewiring people's brains, stripping them of their humanity, and turning them into demons for, given the time difference involved here, possibly a million years now. They're very good at it."

Dean shook his head, stubbornly refusing to look back up. "I get what you're saying but… it doesn't really matter. I mean, I still feel bad about it."

Iris scooted a little closer to Dean on the couch. She put her hand out to him, palm up. "As someone you formerly tortured, I forgive you, Dean. I am positive you didn't have any choice in the matter. I know that might not help you forgive yourself, but I hope you'll at least think about it."

Dean sighed. He finally looked back up and gave Iris a wry smile. "No promises."

Iris returned the smile in kind. After a beat, she said, "Actually, there is one promise I'd like you to make me." Dean raised an eyebrow but said nothing in response. "Please talk to Castiel about this."

Dean started slightly at the unexpected request. "Cas? Why?"

"Because he's been to Hell and knows how it works, because he rescued you, because he'd back up what I'm telling you," and here Iris paused to bring some emphasis to her final point, "and because he cares about you."

"How the hell do you know that?" Dean asked incredulously.

"Because he defied Heaven for you. And I don't know everything that's gone down since then, but the fact that he's still here is pretty compelling."

Dean shrugged. "Fine, whatever. I'll talk to him."

Iris smiled, a warm smile this time. "Thank you. Now, I think I've done enough damage for one evening, so I'm gonna go. Unless there's anything you'd like to talk about?"

Dean barked a laugh. "No. Absolutely not."

As Iris was about to open the door to leave, she was surprised to hear Dean speak again. "Wait." Iris looked back to see Dean's head cocked to one side, like she'd noticed Castiel do when he was curious. "You said you wanted to have this conversation to help us both. How did this help you?"

She smiled sadly. "I'm hoping that in forgiving you, I'll be able to find a way to forgive myself."

*

How is it that I've only been awake a few hours and I already want to go to bed? Iris thought as she trudged back to her room. She had no sooner flopped face first into the bed, however, than she heard a light knock on her door. "Come in," she replied, the reply muffled by the mattress.

Whoever her visitor was must have heard her despite the muffling and entered, closing the door behind them. Iris heard a chuckle from behind her that warmed her heart a bit. "This a bad time?" Charlie asked, the laughter still coloring her tone.

Iris groaned as she flopped over and sat up on the bed. But she smiled at Charlie once she was up. "For you? I think I can muster up the energy. What's up?"

Charlie smiled and set her laptop down on the desk. She then pulled the chair around from the desk to face Iris. "Sam thought you might be worried about your family, so I volunteered to do the research."

"Oh, that's not stalkery at all," Iris teased. Charlie stuck her tongue out in reply. Iris laughed. "Yeah, I never got the chance to check up on them. Didn't want to put them in danger, never got the time to try to check up on them electronically."

Charlie smiled back. "Let's start with your relatives. Your parents have retired to Florida, and your brother is married with a couple of kids and living in Florida nearby."

Iris breathed a sigh of relief. "That all sounds… good for them. I'm a bit surprised my brother decided to have kids, though. What about," and here Iris swallowed against her closing throat before continuing, "what about Tim?"

Iris's heart constricted painfully when Charlie looked a bit reluctant to say. When she spoke, it was with slow caution. "He remarried very quickly." Iris's tense posture relaxed a bit, and Charlie seemed a bit surprised by that. Charlie continued in that same cautious tone, "He was actually under suspicion of having something to do with your death because of how unaffected he seemed to be and how quickly he moved on."

Iris gasped and covered her mouth with one hand. "He wasn't arrested?" she asked in alarm from behind her hand.

"Don't worry," Charlie waived her hand as if to push the worry aside, "he wasn't arrested or anything. After the coroner's report came out stating that you had definitely been attacked by a large dog, that suspicion went away."

Iris laughed with relief. "I thought you were going to tell me something bad had happened to him."

Charlie looked confused by her reaction. "You're married to a guy for eight years, and you're not upset he remarried within a year and didn't seem at all affected by your death?" she asked incredulously.

Iris chuckled. "That was part of the deal, actually, and if I'm honest, I'm surprised they honored that part. If I was going to have to go after ten good years, I didn't want any of my loved ones adversely affected by my death." She paused briefly and then continued, "I guess part of the suspicion was the life insurance policy?"

Charlie's mouth was agape. She snapped it shut and blinked several times. "Uh, yeah, it was." She shook her head as she let out a small chuckle. "You are a piece of work."

Iris smiled brightly. "So I've been told." She patted Charlie's knee. "Thanks for that. Takes a load off my mind."

Charlie glanced at the hand, then back up at Iris's face. "Yeah, sure. Happy to do it."

Iris took her hand back and leaned back on her elbows. "Any other news to share?"

"Uh, not about your family, but I thought you should know that Sam wants to figure out the mystery of how you ended up different from other demons and wants to go over your deal in detail, if and when you're ready."

Iris threw her head back and groaned. "Yeah, that's fine, I just… not tonight."

"No, no, of course not." Silence stretched on between them for a while. Finally, Charlie said, "Can I ask you something?" When Iris indicated for her to continue, Charlie asked, "I really wasn't getting straight vibes from you, but you were married to a man?"

Iris blushed and smiled. "I'm bi. Well, I've been pretty much celibate for a long time, being on the run does that to a person I guess, but…" Iris trailed off, flushing a deeper shade of red. She looked at the ceiling as she continued, "It's been so long since I've been able to have any real relationships. Where I wasn't trying to get information or a favor out of someone, where I could take my time and get to know a person just because I genuinely wanted to. At this point, I feel like I wouldn't even know where to start with making a friend, let alone dating someone." The blush had left her cheeks, but now Iris began to blink against tears that threatened to spill over. "And it's nice of you guys to let me stay, but right now I don't even know where I should belong or what I should do with myself."

The few moments of silence after her rambling speech seemed frighteningly loud to Iris's ears. She was too afraid to look at Charlie, so she sat back up and turned away to swipe at her eyes. "Sorry, I-"

What she'd been going to say died on her lips when Iris felt a hand on her shoulder. "I can't really help with the big questions, but I'd really like to get to know you," Charlie said gently. Iris turned back to Charlie in surprise, and Charlie grinned. "I'm guessing you didn't get to see many movies since 2003, huh? We've got some major movie history to catch you up on! I missed out on a ton of pop culture myself, but I've watched a number of the Marvel movies, and they're super good. Wanna pile up the pillows and watch the first one on my laptop here?"

Iris sniffed and smiled. "I'd like that."

*

The next morning, Iris was getting herself some coffee when Sam walked into the kitchen, obviously getting back from a morning run. "Hey Sam," Iris greeted. Sam returned the greeting and Iris continued, "Charlie said you wanted to go over things with me. I think I'm okay with that. Maybe once Charlie gets up we can go over it all together?"

Sam looked pleasantly surprised. "Yeah, sure. Mind if Dean and Cas sit in as well?"

Iris shrugged to cover her discomfort at the idea. "I guess that's fine. They're all going to hear the story eventually anyway, I guess. I'm not super comfortable talking to a group like that, but I'll bear with it."

"I appreciate it. Sleep okay last night?" Sam asked in an expectant tone of voice.

Iris shrugged. "Fine. Pretty deeply, actually. Like I blinked and it was morning."

Sam started with surprise. "No nightmares?"

Iris raised an eyebrow. "No… there a problem with that?"

Sam shook his head slightly. "No, no. It's just... um, unexpected."

Iris shrugged. "Seems like none of this has gone the way it seems like it should've."

"Fair point," Sam replied.

*

Later that afternoon, Iris, Charlie, Sam, Dean and Cas all met in the Archives. "Okay," Sam said, "Let's start with how you ended up making a deal with a demon in the first place."

"Okay," Iris began, "I was in college, and I went to a party held by a circle of friends I didn't normally hang out with…."