Scarce
Author: Cheryl W.
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Chapter 5: Dogging Every Step
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Heat was pouring off Sheppard, seeping into Lorne and the Major cursed the ineffective antibiotic shot he had administered the Colonel hours ago. Sheppard clearly had a fever now adding to his struggle to keep his feet under him, to walk a straight line, to not sag in Evan's grip.
For John's part, he knew he was nearing the end of his endurance, felt like he was burning up from the inside out. His vision was blurry and wouldn't clear, his balance was shot to hell and his body was shutting down on him. His heart was pounding hard but it wasn't beating right, like it was off tune and his lungs seemed compressed, unwilling to allow him to draw in full inhales or exhales and his legs, his limbs were starting to rebel on him, not listen when he commanded them to move. It wasn't long after when John caught both feet on a tree root and fell.
Evan, however, did his own brand of tackle that ended up with Evan taking the brunt of the contact with the ground while John landed in Evan's lap like an overgrown kid but it kept John from smacking his head into the hard ground and jostling his ribs and opening his wounds. Well Lorne hoped it did that. Easing John off his legs to sit on the ground, he carefully maneuvered the man until his back was resting against a tree. Crouching down beside Shepard, Evan got a full on look at his commander and wasn't all that encouraged, even if most of the blood tainting Sheppard's shirt and hair was the beast's. He pressed his canteen against John's lips and John forgot to only take a sip, to conserve water, instead he drank greedily and Evan let him.
When John spoke, he barely recognized his own voice, was hoarse, weak, "You know I'm fine hanging out here while you go bring the car around."
It was as close to an admission of defeat as Evan had ever heard from John Sheppard and it scared him to death. But he gamely played along with Sheppard. "As much as I'd love to be your personal chauffeur, I don't trust your luck to not get eaten by a friend of your earlier pal."
"I wouldn't get eaten," John tried for indignation but it came out gasping instead.
"Like you wouldn't get mauled," Evan challenged. "Bet taking you to the zoo was like throwing chum to the shark tank." He was rewarded for his efforts when John managed a comeback.
"You're not funny," John retorted. "Now Ronon…he's quite the comedian," he quipped.
"I bet, next Jay Leno," Evan snorted at the thought of the tall tough Satedan cracking political jokes in a three piece suit and John snorted too, probably at the same mental picture, then clutching at his chest, his rib, and sputtered out, "Ow..ow..stop," because laughter wasn't the best medicine in this case.
Evan braced his hand against John's cracked rib to stabilize it, soothed, "Alright, alright, even breaths. Don't tear out the clotting either."
Clamping his eyes shut, John gasped out, "This sucks."
"I know, just hold on. We'll be there soon," Evan pacified.
But John opened his eyes, smirked, "You're a terrible liar."
Evan pretend to huff out a breath in upset, "Fine, we have at least five miles to go and a ridge to climb. Feel better?"
"Not really," John conceded, knew he had to get up but couldn't do it yet.
"You this much of a whiner with your team?" Evan taunted, knew John wouldn't accept words of comfort but jeers he appreciated or else he wouldn't have Rodney McKay as a best friend.
"No, I'm the leader," John confessed, eyes closed, didn't see the clenching of Evan's jaw at his admission.
But Evan couldn't let that statement go unopposed. "They wouldn't think any less of you if you let down your guard, said something when you're in pain."
"Can't," John refuted then opened his eyes, met Lorne's. "I would think less of me."
With frustration, Evan bit out, "You're a stubborn man."
But Sheppard wasn't mad at the label. "Sounds like something I've heard before."
"Probably a lot," Evan shot back even as he felt guilty for berating a man in agony. Shaking his head, trying to get himself and his own emotions locked down, Evan looked down at his CO, saw his black t-shirt bandages were blacker than before, saturated with blood. Sheppard was bleeding out and he was there dragging him across acres of a forest. And John didn't have to be gravely wounded, he shouldn't even be there.
Quietly, Evan earnestly questioned, "Why did you skip town to come with me? Because your team's been pissed at you before so I know it's not just that."
"They have? When?" John demanded, blinking in surprise at that revelation.
"Whenever you take stupid risks, almost get killed." Then Evan smirked, taunted, "So what, four out of five of your missions?"
"Still not funny," John muttered but there was a little light in his eyes again.
Sinking down in the ground beside John, Evan knew he had to let John rest, had to rest himself. Quietly he declared, eyes holding John's, "Kolya got what he deserved, John. No one doubts that and if you hadn't killed him…one of your team would have."
John's denial was instantaneous and firm, "You're wrong." Then he took a breath, painted the true picture for Evan, his voice tainted with shame and regret, "You should have seen their expressions when Kolya went down, the way they all looked at me. Like somewhere along the line they forgot I've been trained to take lives, have done it now in two galaxies."
Lorne partially understood what John had seen in his team's eyes. "It's not like you don't try your hardest to not give them and everyone else that impression. Maybe even yourself."
"Killing isn't my most endearing skill," John self-castigated.
"Endearing? No. But necessary. It's one of the reasons you're a damn fine soldier and the best CO I've had or the mission could ask for. Because you have heart, you care, but you can still do the dark tasks for the greater good. Taint your own soul to keep someone else's pure."
"Me killing Kolya …are we trying to see that as being for the greater good?!" John dared Evan to try and sell that dud.
"He was a threat to Atlantis…and to you," Evan sharply reminded John then a dangerous edge crept into his tone that not many were privy to. "Personally him just being a threat to you was enough to put him on my kill-on-sight list. Ronon's too."
"Yeah but Ronon would put Ronald McDonald on that list with little provocation," John snarked back, didn't know how else to process Lorne's loyalty to him.
But Evan refused to let John deny the truth of his words, of the depth of his friends' loyalty to him, his own loyalty to him. "But Ronon really, really, really wanted Kolya dead. And for the record, so did McKay and Teyla."
That had John staring incredulously at his Major. "Who's the one losing blood and possibly delusional?! McKay couldn't go that dark and Teyla..she's the one who stopped me from killing Kolya on sight. I think I know my team better than you do."
"Do you?!" Evan dared because he didn't think John did, the man was blinded by his low opinion of himself, couldn't accept how much he meant to his team. "So what do you think is going on with your team right now?"
That question wasn't hard like Evan thought it would be. "Rodney's in his lab, Ronon's sparring and Teyla's meditating," he cockily supplied.
"And not a one of them is wondering where you are?" Evan interrogated him.
"Trust me, they want to avoid me like the plague." And John would later attribute it to his fever and the blood loss what he allowed to slip out next, "After that FUBAR mission with the Wraith mind control, me shooting Rodney and Ronon and now this Kolya thing…I get it if they are afraid of me. Maybe they have good reason to be."
Evan couldn't believe John was getting things so wrong. "You're wrong on so many levels. They aren't afraid of you but afraid for you! Going up against Kolya like some gunslinger in the wild west," and there was angry disapproval in Evan's tone, couldn't imagine being a helpless spectator to that like John's team and Carson had been. "You think that didn't scare the crap out of your team?! For a smart guy sometimes you miss the obvious stuff, Sheppard."
Hiding his hurt at Lorne's slam, John grumbled, "Great, kick a guy when he's down and out. Gotta say Major, you're not that much fun on a two man mission."
Shame covered Evan and he hung his head and shook it, silently reproached himself before meeting John's eyes and giving John's uninjured shoulder a squeeze. "I'm sorry, John. I've been too loose with my opinion and my mouth, if you need to write me up…"
"If I decide to do that…" John started off seriously enough before his smirked ruined his façade, "I'll make sure you come off as a real badass. Some very interesting women love a bad boy."
"You would know about that, sir," Lorne mischievously shot back, John's joking having instantly dissolved the tension between them. And that was another thing about Sheppard, he forgave easily, quickly, was just an all around great guy. 'That I dragged into a bad episode of Alien Animal Kingdom and don't know how to get him out of,' Evan berated himself, knew their moment of levity was over, that they had to keep moving. And Sheppard knew it too, silently gave him a nod and Evan aided him to his feet, had to draw Sheppard tight against his side and take most of the Colonel's weight but they managed to be on the move again.
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Pulling out the lifesigns indicator, McKay nearly ran into a tree trying to multitask but he managed, always did. He called out his findings to his fellow travels, "The two dots were stopped for a while but now they are moving again…slowly," said that qualifier with worry because Sheppard traveling slow was never a good sign and if the dots really were Sheppard and Lorne then…
"The other dots, are they…closing in?" Teyla asked as she kept moving through the forest behind Ronon.
"They are gaining ground on them and …" Rodney analyzed the dots formation. "They are still in a line but they are starting to spread out."
Ronon cursed before he concluded, "They are planning on flanking them."
"How far away are we from them?" Teyla directed at Rodney.
"We should intercept them in…probably two miles or so," Rodney calculated and he smiled at that news. "Shouldn't take us long to…" But then Ronon called out a frantic, "Whoa!" and did a wobbling dance of balance before Teyla grabbed him from behind and pulled him from the ledge he almost blindly stepped over as the woods abruptly ended. "What!?" Rodney called out, cautiously made his way to Ronon's side and then found out what the hold up was. "Oh crap," he muttered as he stared down the cliff bringing their fast pace traveling to a standstill.
Ronon looked over the edge as if judging how to get down, if he could slide down or walk down but the angle of the descent was too sharp for safe maneuvering. "We need a way to get down there."
"Thanks for stating the obvious and unfortunately I forgot my mountain repelling gear in my other uniform," Rodney snarked, which his two team mates chose to not acknowledge and he missed John sharply in that moment because John would have had an equally snarky comment to volley back at him. Coming up against vexing situations weren't any fun at all without Sheppard…not like they were fun with him but…Sheppard had a way of making the worst situations…somehow better, gave them hope or …Rodney didn't exactly know but he missed it. 'You better be ok, you idiot,' he silently sent to John as they stood on a ridge separated from their leader and friend.
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Even toeing the line of passing out, John felt the tingle in the back of his spine of danger, sensed Evan did too because the other man had picked up their pace in the last few minutes. But upping their speed from sloth to tortoise wasn't really making much of a successful get away of what they both knew was hunting them.
"Guess we…missed the…inauguration party," John falteringly managed to gasp out, using his ebbing strength to keep his head up, to watch the way forward and keep his legs shuffling toward whatever lay that direction.
Evan had been around John enough to know the man's quirky humor, got his CO's meaning and retorted back, "Yeah, the new Alpha must have delayed his big bash thinking we could be his celebration meal." Had hoped he was just on edge, that the beasts weren't following them like his gut was telling him they were but Sheppard had just confirmed his gut wasn't wrong. "They got down the ridge, are tracking us, aren't they?" Proved just how much faith he had in his CO that he trusted Sheppard's instincts more than his own even when Sheppard was barely staying on his feet, had to be in immense pain.
"Yeah seems like. They must have mountain lion in their DNA cocktail," John confirmed the bad news. "Don't know …how far…"
"But they are closing ground, fast," Evan finished Sheppard's analysis, didn't need Sheppard expounding more energy than he had to. Evan cast a look over his shoulder but he saw nothing, heard nothing. It was just his danger sharpened instincts, Sheppard's razor sharp sixth sense that said the quiet was a lie.
The beasts were coming and they had nowhere to fortify themselves, Sheppard was in no shape to fight and Evan's gun had proven less than ineffective. Sure, Sheppard had killed one…up close and real personal with a knife…to the underside of its jaw with a precise blow that entered the beast's brain. Evan didn't have high hopes the gathering pack would come at him one by one, and sit back patiently and let him find the sweet spot to kill each one in succession. After all, fair play wasn't in these beasts' playbook.
"You know that idea you hated…" John said, as he reached out, used a tree to help keep his balance as he stepped over a small downed tree trunk.
Evan didn't like the sound of this, at all. "Which particular idea we talking about, sir?"
"Me being bait…." John clarified, wasn't surprised when Evan instantly was trying to shut him down.
"No, sir! That's still not an idea I'm even going to take under consideration!" Evan protested.
"Tough!" Sheppard growled, "We're done arguing about it. I'm doing it."
Riding right past his CO's command tone, Evan shook his head and growled back, "Sir, be reasonable!"
John stopped their progress and turned to face his junior officer. "It's Colonel and I'm giving you an order, Major!" he thundered back, eyes blazing with determination.
Yet Evan still wanted to defy Sheppard but then again that trust component had its say. He trusted Sheppard, even when the man came up with the craziest ideas. He trusted him. And he found himself trusting him now, to find a way for them to survive, well for Evan to survive. Evan wasn't convinced the Colonel factored his survival into this but Evan could do his own plan for that outcome without consulting his CO. "Yes, sir," he snapped back, "Permission to know your plan, sir?"
Glad that Lorne was done bulking at his command, at least aloud verbally, Sheppard pulled out his C4 packet from his tac vest. "I'm thinking go big or go home."
Evan's eyes lit up with respect and hope, "We set up booby-traps and they walk right into them when they are too focused on getting to you to worry about anything else being a threat."
John nodded, knew Lorne wasn't his second in command just because his quirky wit complemented Sheppard's own. Pointing to a big tree trunk in their path fifty yards ahead, "I'll take up position there, draw them in."
"I'll set up trip wires," Lorne said as he pulled out his own C4 packet and lead wires.
"Yeah, it's no spiked pitfalls or swinging logs of death but we can't be situationally creative under a time crunch," John joked, remembering all the survival movies he watched as a kid and how he loved all the jungle booby-traps, thought it would great to set them up himself someday. 'But not today,' he reminded himself, not with all that much disappointment. Today he'd take the comparative cheat of blowing the fish out of the water instead of catching them on a fishing line.
Knowing Sheppard's mind was again on scenes out of a movie, Lorne drawled, "I think we'll take the bad reviews on IMDB for our lack of creativity in dispatching our foes."
"They say creativity is the first casualty of rushing…"John couldn't help quip back.
"Better creativity being a casualty rather than us," was Evan's instant rejoined.
"You make a fine point, Major," John conceded, handing Evan his C4 pack, lead wires and the trigger box, which the other man laid out on the tree trunk beside John along with his own supplies. Doing quick calculations in his head, John determined, "If we split each C4 up into three pieces and link the lead wires we can cover 16… 17 yards."
Lorne nodded in agreement to Sheppard's calculations but pointed out, "We put it directly behind us, it lets our flanks open if they attack us from the sides, like their style when they were stalking us."
Sheppard bit his lip in contemplation. "You're right. So 7 yards on each side and two yards front and center," and he pointed to the ground twelve feet from his current position and where he planned to sit as bait.
Lorne didn't like the idea of Sheppard only having two yards of booby trap in front of him to deter any of the beasts from attacking straight on, aiming to finish the job of killing Sheppard that their former alpha had started. However, Lorne couldn't refute the genius of Sheppard's strategy. "Ok, we don't know how much time we have so…."
Sheppard finished his sentence, "Let's divvy up the C4 and rig the triggers for a trip wire. Then you can set the flanking traps and I'll set the mini me one."
Lorne opened his mouth to protest John's self-assigned task but his superior was giving him that silent but understood command to shut up and do what I tell you to do. With a tad showing of ill grace, Evan nodded his head and then he and Sheppard worked quickly yet carefully to tear the C4 packets into sixteen small rounds of putty. But when they came to the triggers, they were one short which Sheppard had already planned for because he announced. "I'll shoot the mini me C4 if they come that way and you can climb a tree, see from your high ground when to trip the other traps."
Again Evan wanted to protest the risks involved, not in his part of the plan but Sheppard's. Without even talking about Sheppard being bait, having to shoot such a small target wasn't easy not to mention the factors that were already stacked up against Sheppard. Namely the man was gravely injured, might not have the steadiest hands to make a precise shot like that, not to mention the beasts moved fast, didn't give a lot of time to react. However, loyalty and faith in his CO had him swallowing down his objections. Sheppard was one of those people that, when the odds weren't in his favor, he was even more determined to win, some would say too stubborn to lose. Either way, there was no one else Evan would want at his side when the grim reaper seemed to be clearing a path to get to you.
The components for the trip wires assembled, Evan insisted on helping Sheppard to the spot where he would put the two yards of trip wire, eased the man down to kneel on the ground they laid his supplies down. But before he left John to do his own traps, Evan pulled Sheppard's knife out of his boot and offered it to John. "I thought it might be a lucky knife so I didn't think we should leave it behind. Besides, it wasn't doing the beast any good there in his eye."
A slow smile broke across John's pale but pleased face as he took the knife gratefully. "Your thoughtfulness might remove some dings I was going to put in your appraisal review."
"Well, sounds like I could use all the help I can get," Evan drawled with a smile but with his next sentence he knew he was again going to probably earn himself ill marks with his CO. "Stay here until I can help you back into position," he ordered sternly, didn't want John using his limited energy trying to walk on his own, or, more likely, he would collapse and aggravate his wounds. Turning the tables on Sheppard, Lorne gave John's shoulder a companionable squeeze and then he disappeared into the woods before John could protest. Pacing out from John's position to determine where to set his traps, he prayed they didn't get visitors before they had the welcome mats in place.
Ten minutes later, his one set of traps set, Evan came rushing back to John, hoping the man listened to him and didn't try to move on his own. He was relieved to see Sheppard was still sitting on the ground where he had left him, but as he drew closer, the man's sweat soaked colorless face which was bowed down, his chin resting on his chest told him it wasn't good behavior that had the man listen to him but more an all out inability to move.
Crouching down beside Sheppard, Lorne, not wanting to startle the man, gently greeted, "Hey, how are you doing, John?"
Sheppard raised his head with slow determination, his fever bright eyes came up to land on Lorne's facial features. "My trap was set hours ago, what took you so long to do yours?" he quirked, hoping to deflect the concern he saw in the Major's eyes.
"I'm a slacker, thought you figured that out already," Evan gamely replied, before he slid behind Sheppard and helped the man to his feet. John immediately staggered to the right and Evan quickly shifted to his side and coiled his arm around the wounded man's waist, felt the brunt of most of Sheppard's lanky frame tilt against his own body. It was a slow shuffle back to the downed tree for Sheppard's perch, all the while Even was rethinking John's premise of being bait, of shooting the small half dollar size C4 to ignite it if the beasts came straight up the path for him.
Sinking heavily unto the downed tree trunk, John watched as Evan tried to not shift on this feet, knew what the man was thinking and he admitted, only to himself, that Evan wasn't all that wrong. John wasn't seeing that clearly, and his hands setting the C4 were shaky, made him glad C4 was a pretty stable explosive so him winning a sharp shooting contest right then wasn't looking good. Especially since his right shoulder where Tigger had bit him was radiating agony down his arm making shooting the gun with his right hand not viable so he was going to do a lefty shot, course he had no plans to tell Lorne that tidbit. All that led to one acceptable conclusion: only his life was going to hang in the balance of his questionable aim. "You better get to work on the other trip wire," he suggested, knew by Evan's expression that he was just delaying their repeat argument on him playing bait but he was never one to protest having more time to make a defensive strategy.
Reluctantly, Evan nodded and headed off to set the other flanking trap. Was trying to formulate a valid reason for him to be bait and not Sheppard that his CO might see the logic in. But he wasn't hopeful so he was working on his backup plan which involved him NOT watching Sheppard get killed that day.
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Rodney's expression was a new level of incredulous refusal. "I'm not Tarzan!" he shrilly pointed out to Ronon as the other man continued to untangle vines thinking to generously call them "ropes".
Cocking an eyebrow but not stopping his work, Ronon asked in true confusion, "Who?"
"Never mind," Rodney snapped, chancing a step closer to the ridge's edge to look down, which just made him dizzy. Retreating back ten steps he demanded, "And how do we know we won't plummet to our deaths with your jungle man repelling kit?"
Ronon simply shrugged his shoulders, calmly replied, "I'll go first. If I fall…then we know you'll need to find another way down," a teasing smile tugging up his lips.
"Oh lovely, really needed that mental picture in my head," Rodney groused.
Stepping to Rodney, Teyla put a hand on her friend's arm. "Though it is not rope, I believe the vines will hold our weight. I have seen villages make bridges from such materials."
"Good for them," Rodney snarked back but then he got ahold of his fears and nodded in submission to Ronon's plans. Because Rodney knew that, if their roles were reversed, John would risk falling off a cliff if he was the one in danger. And not only that, but if he didn't do this and something happened to John that he could have prevented…he wouldn't be able to deal with that. "Sheppard's going to owe me epically after this."
Ronon smiled reassuringly at his teammate, "We all know he's good for a heroic save. He'll pay you back."
"I'm not sure if that's encouraging or not because I really don't want or like having to be saved," Rodney retorted back but there was decidedly less tension humming off the man. "But you're not reneging on your offer," he said to Ronon, "You're going first."
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His task completed, Lorne hurried back to Sheppard, found him leaning heavily against the tree in back of the downed trunk, but he was conscious, alert enough to sense his approach and straightened up like Evan hadn't seen how weakened he was, couldn't tell the pain he was in. "All set, sir."
"Good," John said, hated how raspy and weak his voice sounded. "You better high tail it up a tree before our guests arrive."
"Sheppard I think we should rethink our plan," Evan began but John raised his hand, stopping the other man's rehearsed deliberation.
John went for the honest truth, the cold hard facts, knew Evan deserved to be able to make an informed decision. "I hate to admit this, but right now I can't climb a tree, Lorne. I can't outrun these pussy cats and last time I went mano e mano with one, yeah I won but I wouldn't recommend it as a sure thing. I think the whole 'falling down a cliff' distraction gave me a little advantage. So sitting here, that I can do. The other thing, " and he pointed up to the tree limbs overhead, "I can't. You have to do it."
Evan wanted to come up with an alternate tactic, had been trying to all along. But it wasn't like he could send Sheppard on without him and play bait himself, the man couldn't walk unaided. And if they left now, they couldn't count on the beasts tripping the traps without an incentive to center in on the location John was in right then and there. And then there was the delay in their putting distance between them in order to set up the traps, the beasts were close, would be on them before too long. It was the frigging Alamo or Custer's Last Stand and neither one of those events turned out good.
Knowing it was time for the mission pep speech, John met Evan's troubled gaze. "I don't know about you but I'm tired of being the hunted. It's royally starting to piss me off. We are top of the food chain…well the Wraith are but they aren't here so it's us. We eat them, they don't eat us, it's the way it's supposed to be and I am so not Michael Douglas. I'm Val Kilmer, we both are."
Evan just had to smirk at his CO's rallying call for battle. Here they were about to take on savage man killing lion like beasts and Sheppard had found a way to make him belligerent at the beasts enough to want the fight to come, to believe there was no way they wouldn't win. "I am man…hear me roar?" he teased and John smirked back.
"Exactly. So shimmy up a tree and let's show these mutant lions we're no one's inauguration meal," John doggedly declared.
"Yes, sir," Lorne readily replied, knew that if this was to be their last stand, he couldn't have been in better company, realized then just how Sheppard's teammates felt on their missions when things looked to be lost. Truly understood then and there why they had undying devotion and love for their commanding officer because, as his grandmother would say, 'he was a keeper.'
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Apparently sitting around waiting to be eaten gave a man time to think. And as much as John knew he should be grateful for any time he had left on his meter, his thoughts weren't of the grateful sort. Regardless of his cocky words to Evan, he did know how things like this could very well turn out, had turned out last time, on this day exactly 4 years ago. Two men pursued relentlessly, one gravely injured, the other foolishly noble and hopeful that they would both make it out of the situation alive. But they hadn't. Holland hadn't. And for so long John had shoved all that down, his guilt, his utter failure, his naivety that he could save Holland just by being there with him, because Holland wasn't alone anymore. How stupid he had been. And he tried to never think of it, of Holland, of watching his friend die in his arms in a barren desert so far from home, surrounded by enemies and no one coming to rescue them. Didn't want to dwell on his up–to–that-point worse epic failure. Well, until his whole waking the Wraith thing which topped all his failures, probably topped all failures of most of mankind.
But that first huge failure, it was a dirty little secret only those who had clearance to read his military files knew about. Colonel Sumner hadn't been shy about shoving it in his face but then there had been Elizabeth who knew about it and still trusted him, not only to tag along and turn on Ancient equipment but to protect all of Atlantis. Course there was the Wraith mind control thing and his secret got a reenactment in full living color and it had felt so damn real, like Holland was there with him, was savable this time. And he had vowed he would save him, that it was real, that he had a chance for a do over, and he would risk everything, sacrifice everything, would not hold back any part of him to do better this go around. Was probably why he had been so quick to shoot, to not question how this do over happened, to not think, use logic, use his damn brain…instead of being lead around by his broken heart. And how did that go?! He nearly killed two of the people he cared about most in two galaxies, shot his own men, his friends. Without thought. If Teyla hadn't knocked off his aim …Rodney would be dead by his hand.
All of that, it had kicked open the door on Holland's death, on failing him, on being so damn quick to pull the trigger, of desperation to save someone, to not lose someone he cared about. And he could no longer shove the memories away in that box, they had started to slip out when he couldn't afford them to. Knew that he might endanger his team if he lost track of his thoughts on a mission. And besides all that, Holland deserved to be remembered, not as John's failure but as one of John's best friends, a brave warrior, one of the best pilots the Air Force had ever known. And that was what John had intended to set today aside for: to remember, to honor…maybe to finally grief for the life lost, instead of grief over the lost chance to spare that life.
But instead of spending time memorializing his friend, in a sick twist of fate, he was reliving that hellish two man journey. This go around, however, he was the wounded one, the one needing rescuing, the one slowing their pace, risking his friend's life. Now he understood Holland's words better than he ever had before. "Whatever happens, thanks for coming for me." Like it was enough he had come for him, that it didn't matter if they didn't make it, if Holland didn't make it. John's presence, his loyalty to stick by him, it was enough of a reward, Holland was telling him that he didn't need his life saved on top of that gesture.
Shit but John got it now. Because it was enough that Evan had helped him get this far, had not wanted him to be bait. Had done whatever he could to keep him alive, endangering his own life in the process. Evan had done enough…wished he had told the man that before they parted ways. But Evan probably wouldn't understand, wouldn't accept the gratitude any more than he had with Holland in that desert. What was the saying… walk a mile in their shoes…..
Today he had been where Holland was and he knew what it was to not be alone, to know he might die but it would not be alone. That he had someone to fight to the last with him, to believe he was worthy to be saved, even if that wasn't his fate. And it made a difference, more than he thought it did, than he thought his coming to Holland, trying to save Holland had. When you were the man who thought he was being left behind and then finding someone wasn't willing to leave you behind, there was redemption in that that had nothing to do with living or dying but knowing you mattered.
That he mattered.
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From his position twenty feet up in a tree a few feet behind Sheppard's location, Evan barely had time to shout out a warning to Sheppard "East Side!" the beasts having approached their position unbelievably stealthily. Then he triggered the trap, felt the boom of the explosion, the concussion shake the ground and saw the area around the trip line billow with stirred up dirt, underbrush and tree remnants in the maelstrom and Evan thought two beasts were caught in the explosion, heard inhuman howls of agony that put a bit of a shiver down his spine.
But he didn't have time to make sure the beasts were down, swiveled his focus to Sheppard, looked ahead and luckily didn't see anything coming for the wounded man, then he looked to the West and cursed as he realized a beast had already made it by the trip line. Praying he wasn't too late, he triggered that one, got the same sound at the detonation and tremble under the tree but there was no howl of agony. "Sheppard one might be coming from the West side!" he shouted even as he was starting to climb down the tree, to get to Sheppard, to stand between his superior officer and whatever sought to hurt him.
Even as he sought foot holds in the lower branches, Evan traded off looking around the area. He was half way down when he saw limbs being jolted, like something was pushing its way through the woods heading right for Sheppard's position. "Straight ahead, something's coming your way!"
Knowing he had to place his bets on which beast reached him first, John decided on the beast boldly cutting through the woods to come right at him, not slinking around the side. The beast clearly wanted to show his power, to prove his new status as Alpha was earned and shouldn't be challenged. So John sat there, didn't run, couldn't run, wasn't his job to run but the gun felt heavy in his hand as he lifted it, aimed at the C4 and his heart was ramping up as the crashing sound of something smashing its way through the woods to get to him got louder. "This might have been the worst plan of all your worst plans, John," he muttered to himself and then the beast was visible, snapping tree limbs like they were blades of grass and coming barreling right at him.
Struggling to keep his left arm steady, to line up the shot, John forced himself to wait, to ignore the massive beast charging for him, to not panic and shoot too early. He wanted this thing nice and blown up which meant he couldn't chicken out, had to time it just right. The beast's massive body tore through the woods' natural beauty, its eyes fixed on Sheppard, it's mouth open in a snarl, it's disturbing grace bounding it along by leaps and bounds, closer, closer, closer. And still John forced himself to stand his ground, to not fire, not until the beast was above the C4 packet.
Twenty five yards between him and the brand spanking new alpha. Then twenty two, twenty, eighteen, sixteen…only four yards to go, John's finger on the trigger….poised…But before the beast reached the C4, a shot rang out from behind John's position. Evan's bullet went true, hit the C4 even as John was ducking down against the tree trunk, covering his head with his left hand to avoid the explosion fall out. A second later, the boom happened and the ground shook, hard, and things started to pelt him.
Then Evan was there leaning over John, protectively covering John's body with his own, making sure no more harm came to Sheppard. He flinched as shards of tree painfully struck his back and head and legs and there was also something wet and slimly raining down on him but he didn't shift his position away. Instead he hunched farther over John, shielded John's face by locking his arms on either side of his CO's head. He waited until the debris fallout petered out before he shifted up, squinted through the smoky choking swirling dirt, ears straining for sounds of the beast.
For John's part, it took more effort than it should have for him to push himself upright on the tree trunk. Then he too froze like Evan had, trying to discern anything in the smoke and dirt dustup that reminded him of how it was trying to land a helicopter in the Middle East where visibility just disappeared in a brown out. It left him with nothing to do but trust his skills and his instincts. But right then, both of those gifts were giving him nothing, forcing him to accept how badly he was hurt. So he did the next best thing to trusting himself, he trusted his second in command. "We get it?" he quietly asked, didn't want to distract Lorne as the man started to step forward to investigate.
"Don't know. Wait here sir." Then Evan stepped forward, probably only took three steps before he was camouflaged by the brownout and John lost visual sight of him. Turning on his P90's light, Evan poked a beam of light through the dense pollution, could make out the ground littered with wood, bark, leaves and bloody pulp. A few more steps and his light hit on the carcass of the beast gruesomely torn apart by the C4. For good measure, Evan kicked the beast's body and to his relief there wasn't even any residual nervous system movement. "Beasts down, sir," he called over his shoulder to Sheppard.
Sheppard's voice came back to him out of the murky air, "Did we get them all?"
"I'm not sure," Lorne reluctantly reported, wished he could be certain. "This makes three down but I don't know if the one from the west was done for the count or if there were more. On the ridge there was four and the alpha."
"I didn't hear anything coming from the west before the alpha attacked but you better confirm the kill," the Colonel ordered before he tacked on, "A wounded but not dead beast is never a good thing."
Even as he began the tedious trek to the west, his meager light shining the way through the haze, the Major quirked back, "Another helpful survival tidbit learned from a particular movie?"
"Only every creature feature movie I've ever seen," John volleyed back and he didn't miss Lorne's chuckle as he sensed the Major's voice traveling as the man was moving to the west.
Slowly the smoke and the debris was disbursing in front of John as he waited tensely for Lorne to either find the other carcass or report that they still had a beast out there on the prowl, probably pretty pissed off. But he could tell just by Lorne's voice that the news was good. "Found it, Sir. It's dead."
At the news, John hung his head in relief and utter exhaustion. Took that moment to allow weakness to show when Lorne wasn't there to witness it. When he heard footsteps trumping down underbrush, he knew Lorne was approaching his position and he forced himself to straight up and raise his head. He instantly froze but this heart started jackhammering in his chest.
A beast was cockily loping toward him like he knew his prey didn't have any chance at all of getting away from him, that it would just be amusing if it tried to.
"Ah, crap, he delegated," John muttered before he raised his voice but kept it steady, calm, didn't want to heighten the beast's thrill of the hunt. "Lorne hold!"
"Sir?!" tension and concern in the one word coming from Lorne who sounded close.
Still using his calm tone, John imparted the bad news even as his eyes stayed latched onto the approaching beast. "The alpha delegated, had the others attack from the sides and then set up one of his lackeys to come straight for me, take the hit…"
"So he could walk right up after we let down our guard, knowing we blew our payload and he's in no real danger of us hurting him," Lorne surmised bitterly, didn't think he was overestimating the animal's cleverness. Then he began to move again, toward John's position as quickly as he could trying to not make too much noise while visibility wasn't great yet. "Damn thing is one of the lions from The Ghost and the Darkness and I think we're both Michael Douglas," he muttered, wished Sheppard hadn't put that movie reference in his head because crap, he had bet Michael's character would have been the last one standing and had been wrong. Strangely hoped he was wrong again, that they were both Val Kilmer instead.
Apparently unable to contain its thirst for the kill a moment longer, the beast's lope morphed into a trot and then a full out charge, accompanied by a roar that put a shiver down John's spine. Though he knew it was probably useless, John still emptied the last of his bullets into the thing until his gun went dry. But it was like the beast was bullet proof, didn't even feel the bullets pinging into his hide, it never even slowed his charge, was locked onto Sheppard like a heat seeking missile. 'And here I am without any countermeasures,' John bleakly thought, even as he dropped his useless gun and pulled out his knife. He wasn't expecting Evan to sudden burst out of the woods in that moment, and step between him and the beast, a hefty broken tree limb in his hands. "No!" John shouted, understanding Evan's intentions and not agreeing to them at all.
Digging his feet in to get a good stable stance, Evan ignored his CO's protest and choked up his hold on the tree limb. 'And here I thought I'd never put my little league baseball experience to use' he joked with himself, had begun to accept that the Pegasus galaxy had a way of making him use every single ounce of himself to survive, to protect those he swore to keep safe. Like now.
Right then and there, he wasn't past using his painting skills if it would help him stop this animal from getting to Sheppard. Then time seemed to slow down as the beast ran for him, seemed intent on knocking him aside to get to Sheppard. Like maybe the villagers had it right that touching that first dead body had marked the Sheppard…that or the new alpha wanted to kill the man who had killed his predecessor to show his worth. Yeah, probably option two was more animal thought processes.
Then there was no more time for analysis or doubts or fears, was only Evan timing his swing. The limb struck the beast in the head, had it stumbling to the right. The impact vibrated up Evan's arm, nearly numbing it but Evan only tightened his grip, pursued the beast while it was off kilter, got in another blow to its head that had the beast stagger to the ground.
Taking advantage of the beast's weakness, Evan drew closer, was going for an over the head downward strike for optimum power. But from its crouched position, the beast lashed out, his paw batting Evan like he would a play mouse, sending the Major flying backward in the air to collide back first into a tree. Evan landed heavily unto the ground, was trying to draw in breath to his jarred body even as his eyes frantically sought out the beast. Found it was alive and well and getting up, but wasn't coming for him, was again setting its sights for Sheppard, who was somehow standing, had probably been attempting to come to Lorne's aid in the ill fated fight. Watching the beast start toward John, Evan would have shouted 'No! Stay away from him you bastard!' if he had breath, but even as he tried to push himself up, to move, his arms folded under him and he still had yet to take in any air.
Relieved that Evan wasn't dead, that the man hadn't been killed in same stupid move to protect him, John faced the new Alpha, knew that he had to kill the thing or it would finish him off and then go for Evan, who didn't look so spry right then. But how to kill it was the big bonus question of the day because all he had as far as weaponry was his knife and he couldn't run to evade it or draw it away from Evan. So with all the smart options off the table, he did what came naturally to him.
Tightening his grip on his knife's hilt, John beckoned the beast forward with a wave of his fingers. "Come on then! Let's do this already. I'm tired of you stalking me!" he growled out, letting his frustration and anger and worry for Lorne bubble to the surface, give him courage, strength. "Honestly I thought your predecessor was a cad for just stepping in when we were cornered but you, my friend, you take the cake. You sacrificed your entire pride to make sure you didn't get hurt and now you come for me." He forced himself to not retreat as the Alpha drew closer, used his ranting boasts of retribution to steady his nerves. "Well I plan on taking a chunk out of your hide before I go, leaving a nasty reminder of me that will keep the ladies away. Because scars are sexy but missing ears, eyes, deformed mouths, and ugly long knife cuts will have them running screaming away from you." Then there was no more time for trash talking, was no more time for anything but for John to tighten his already white knuckled grip on his knife and brace himself for the beast's impact.
Using its massive hind legs to spring off the ground, the alpha leapt for Sheppard.
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TBC
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Yes, the return of the evil cliffies! Can't say I didn't warn you. HEHE
Thanks again for my awesome reviewers and the lovely silently readers out there.
Have a great day!
Cheryl W.