Thank you, everyone, for going on this ride with me! This story started out as a quick fic to get through a writer's block, but I'm really happy to see how this turned out. This is my first officially finished story, so I think that's amazing! Keep an eye out for my other stories, I'll be posting soon enough. Hopefully you all enjoyed this story as much as I have! So, again, thank you! Please enjoy and review!

Third Person Point of View

It rains the day she's buried.

The church is filled to the brim with people on the morning of her service. Everyone present had been touched by the once vivacious guardian.

Her mother sits a stoic vigil in the front row, a moroi in a suit with a bright red scarf sits close to her side, close but not quite touching. He stares with blank eyes as the funeral progresses.

Her self proclaimed brother sits nearby, his eyes wide and devastated as he stares at the picture of her standing in the front.

Her bond mate and her temporary charge are seated in the front. The blue eyed Moroi is holding the girl close to him, he's trying to be strong for the princess, even as a tears trail down his face. The Princess looks broken and hollow, almost like she lost the light in her life. No one says anything as she looks on with unseeing eyes that haven't stopped crying since she found out.

Her lover walks in with the other spirit user. No one bats an eye. No one even notices the support the Moroi seems to be giving the taller guardian. No one sees the stoic god's red rimmed eyes, the tremble in his hands or even the cuts from beating a punching bag until his skin tore. No one realizes that the once drunken playboy is trying to be the rock for the once unshakeable dhampir. The duo joins the rest of her family in the front in stoic silence.

All eyes stay at the front at the two coffins, the smaller of the two is laid out lower than that of the fallen guardian, it contains her most loyal companion, her familiar, better known as Jericho.

The service begins in a praise of the Guardian's short but full life. Her love of life and her family is shared, they speak of her dedication and passion. When the time comes and people can speak, there's nothing ill to be said.

She was a brave and loyal friend, reckless and relentless, she was beautiful and wild chaos contained by sarcasm and deadly precision. They speak of her kindness, that even with the rumors and her unexpected start as a guardian she took the time to be kind to people.

Her ability to lighten up a room was unrivaled. Her smile was breathtaking. Her protectiveness was praised.

Her closest family can't bring themselves to speak. The guilt heavy on all of their shoulders but when it comes time to take the coffin, they rise.

They rise to carry the weight of her to her final resting place.

When she is laid to rest and the words are spoken, everyone throws a rose down to cover her final resting place, her familiar right beside her, just as he had passed. When it's all said and done and people leave to escape the rain, her family remains.

"She would have hated this." The fire user murmurs. There's a quiet agreement.

They're unaware of the two sets of knowing eyes watching them. The head guardian sighs softly before walking up to the group that hurt and loved her the most.

"Come with me." She tells the group before turning on her heels to lead them away, the doctor close behind her.

The group look amongst themselves before following the guardian and the doctor to the cabin that she had held close to her heart. The tall guardian is the only one to hesitate before going in, his heart in his throat as he takes a seat around the duo. The guardian pulls out papers from the drawer and hands them out while the doctor starts a recording from a cellphone.

To my family who I love more than anything. I'm sorry.

There's a collective intake of breath as they all hear her voice once again. Lissa barely manages to stifle a sob and Dimitri bows his head. Everyone visibly tenses.

I wrote you guys letters, a book really, hopefully Berta gave you the copies… I just wanted to say it out loud. I needed to know that when you read it that you'd hear my voice and know that I am sincere. There's a nervous chuckle. Everyone turns to the pages they have, all photocopies of the original handwritten pages. Berta hands to original to her bond mate.

So, I'll go back to beginning, because I need you to understand.

They all listen with rapt attention as she described her story, about how they all got here, from Portland to the academy, to when and how she realized she was sick and how their actions played into the grand scheme of it all.

I don't want to rehash all of this to make any of you feel guilty. What is done is done, I just need you to to understand why I couldn't tell you when I had the chance. I was alone, just Jer and I with the help of Dr. O and eventually Alberta, and truly I had given up.

There's a soft intake of breath, like a hitch in her voice.

I gave up. She sounds like she's crying. And somehow I managed to convince myself that it was better to be alone because then I wouldn't be bringing you all down with me. I love you guys so much, and I didn't want you to get attached when I'd be leaving so soon. I think most importantly I didn't want to get close to you again, because then I would want to stay.

Christian. I just wanted to say thank you. I get why you were so mad at me, I lied, I lied through my teeth but please know that I couldn't explain it to you when I couldn't even comprehend it myself. I'm eighteen and I'm dying. That's not an easy burden to carry. I appreciate your concern, so thank you for trying to be my friend. You were a kick ass charge and I hope you keep making that amazing meatloaf, someone's got to be the house wife! Her soft chuckle is answered by a wet snort from Christian.

Adrian. You're a great guy, really you are. Under all the smoke and the alcohol, you are amazing and talented, don't think I didn't notice your drawings. You have so much potential and I hope that you can learn to see that in yourself. You deserve it and so much more! Let the darkness go and try to be the best you that you've got, you owe it to yourself to try. Adrian's gaze looks far away as he looks out the window.

Eddie. You were right about me being the reason Mason is gone, hopefully by now I've managed to apologize in person. I can't change what happened in Spokane, but still I'm sorry you lost your brother and hopefully I manage to actually tell you this. There's nothing you could have done to save either of us, Eddie, I need you to know that, what happened to Mason and I is not your fault. I know you, and I know you've thought about it, but I'm telling you the truth, you couldn't have saved me any more than you could have saved Mason. You're going to make an excellent guardian and I am so glad that I got to watch you grow into the man you're becoming. I hope you manage to stay true to yourself and be the guardian we all trained so hard to be. You're not only a brother to me, but one of my best friends, so stay safe and be happy. Eddie buries his face in his hands.

Dr. O? Alberta? I just wanted to take a quick second to thank you. You both have stood by me and looked out for me when I stopped doing it for myself. I wouldn't have made it this far without you, you two are my heroes, you bought me the time to try and figure this all out. I wouldn't have gotten to live out these past few months with out either of you. Thank you for making my days a little less lonely.

Okay. She sighs softly.

Lissa? I… geez, I almost don't know what to say, I mean I'm looking at it but, I just need to say I love you. The princess sobs.

You're my family, my sister, my bond mate, my moroi. You've been the world to me and you need to know that. You have so much life to live and while I don't know what losing the bond will do, I do know this. You're going to make it through, alright? Spirit and its darkness has nothing on you, you're going to have to take your meds and work hard every single day. If you ever don't want to do it for yourself, do it for me, because I need you to try.

I'm not going to be here to catch you when you fall, the bumpers are down and it is time to stumble around a bit on your own, even though hopefully Christian will be there with you to make it through, you need to be able to walk on your own as well. You have a long and bright future ahead of you and I'm just going to say this in advance and say that I am so proud of you.

You are beautiful, smart and funny and you're going to take the world by storm. I am so lucky to have had you. You are never alone, even when you feel you are, you aren't. I promise, one day all of this pain will be worth it. Maybe one day when you have a little one you'll remember me and smile and tell them about their crazy Aunt Rose who loved them long before they even existed. You're going to be okay, Lissa, I promise.

I love you, little sister.

Lissa gives a soft cry before falling scarily quiet.

There's a long drawn out pause but eventually they hear her take a deep shaky breath.

Hey comrade. She gives out a watery chuckle that makes everyone flinch. I hate to put you on the spot, but I hope that you don't mind, just this once, I promise. I just really hope that I made up with you before this because I said some awful things to you today, and I hate myself for it. I didn't mean a single word, not one, but I wanted to protect you.

After the raid… I thought I'd lost you, but we made it and I lost you anyway… and then there's life and… and I just really hope I told you that I love you before I'm gone. Because I do, love you, so much. I love you so much it borders on pathetic, like really comrade, this is insane. You… There's what sounds like a muffled sob.

You… are everything to me. You're my mentor, my friend, my confidant, my lover, my happily ever after. You're it for me. I know that it's selfish, but I don't care. I find myself wondering what it could have been like to be in another life, to have your babies and grow old with you… but this one could have been worse, I could have never met you, so at least I got to have you, even if it was just for a little while. It was worth it, every second.

Thank you for helping me with the darkness, for listening, and for showing me what true love is. Thank you for being my safe place to be myself and act my age. Thank you for being mine. All I've ever wanted was your happiness and while I won't be cliché and say move on, know that I always want you to be happy, always. And if nothing else know this: whenever you feel alone, you're not, when you're fighting, I've got your six, I'll share your laughter and try to wipe your tears when you're sad. Just know that I'm here, in some way, shape or form.

Thank you for bringing us back to the academy Dimitri, you changed my life.

I love you, Comrade, always.

There's some soft sniffles on the recording and they turn to see the tears finally falling down the destroyed guardians face.

Okay guys. It's time for me to wrap this up.

Everyone turns back to the phone.

You guys are my family and I love you so much. Carry me with you and maybe one day we'll be reunited again. I'm here waiting, alright, so make sure you live some amazing adventures so when we see each other again, you'll have plenty of stories to tell me, okay?

Okay. She sighs softly.

I love you.

The recording goes dead and everyone is staring at the phone as if expected her to pop out of it. No one tries to hide their tears.

There's silence in the room. One by one they all eventually leave the room and when the door closes on that cabin, it's never visited again.

Years later (Dimitri POV)

Years had ticked by like seconds on the clock. One day they were standing at Rose's grave and the next, life had some how moved on.

Vasilisa eventually became queen and married Christian, they had one child, a girl fondly named Rose, before Vasilisa was forced to have a hysterectomy, ending her chances of having more children. When darkness came knocking, the Queen went to a dark place. Her depression and anger raged. It showed everywhere in her life. The Queen and her Consorts' marriage began to fall apart and eventually so too did her reign.

When an attempt on her life was made, Christian took the bullet, he bled out in her arms. Lissa made it a few years, she tried, I know she did, but eventually spirit's madness took its toll and neither little Rose or I could pull her back. She eventually took her own life.

Adrian went back to school and got a degree, eventually opening up an art studio of his own. He met an Alchemist named Sydney. They fell in love and got married but when they were expecting their first child they were attacked in the studio and Sydney was killed. Adrian was never the same.

After Lissa's death I requested to be his guardian, he was a mess. He gave up art and decided to get away. We moved from place to place for a while but one morning I woke up and he didn't.

Eddie fell in love with his charge, Jill, who was eventually found out to be Lissa's half sister. He died protecting her, but not before leaving her with a child of his own, a son who she named Mason, Eddie's wish. Jill lived on to have a few more children, ensuring the continuation of the royal lineage.

As a guardian no one really expected me to live as long as I had, I'd managed to look over those that Rose had loved the most. I never managed another real relationship, I'd dated, one relationship had gotten serious but had ended when it became apparent that I couldn't commit. No one was my Roza and no one could or would take her place. The love I had for her never faded, in some ways it only grew.

I had done all I could… truly I had, now I just wait for my day to come. Maybe there will be a peace in death that had remained elusive to me in life. Even after joining some of the most dangerous missions, I still managed to live, I guess she wasn't joking about having my six, I'd faced death down many a time, and yet here I still remain.

I often wonder if this is how she'd felt in the end? Did she count the days? The minutes and seconds? Did it still take her by surprise? Did she lie awake at night and long for death's embrace?

I don't even know how many years had passed. Little Rose had recently had her third child. I sigh. By Vlad. She was how old now? In her mid 30's, at least. Roza had been gone much longer than she'd been here, it's been over 40 years. How had time flown so fast?

It's hard to believe how much life had changed. Little Rose had become like a daughter to me. I was there for her high school and college graduation, I'd walked her down the aisle and rocked her first born to sleep many late nights, I'd been the first person she told when she found out she was expecting each of her children, hell every morning she still wakes up to join me for a cup of coffee and training. She was everything I wished I could have had with Roza.

When it'd come time for me to retire, she'd finally shown me the guest house that she'd remodeled for me, claiming her old man wouldn't stay anywhere else. There were some things about the girl that were clearly her parents, but there were some moments that she'd remind me so strongly of her namesake it'd physically hurt me.

So many years had passed, years marked with agony and joy and in that time I'd come to care for Roza's family as if they were my own… and still there was a gaping hole that only she could fill. It's almost insane to believe that I still loved her as I do. The love we had, had been so brief but I was forever changed. Rose had left her mark on my life and I wouldn't change any thing in it. I know that I have a family, but still I feel so alone.

A warm breeze comes through my window.

Yes, Roza, I know I'm not quite so alone… I rest on my bed, staring out at the sky contemplating the years. One person had turned my world upside down and I'd never been able to put it right again. I close my eyes, picturing her in my mind. Even though I focus the image is blurry, merely a pour replica of a picture that had long since withered.

When I open my eyes I'm in a living room. I startle, sitting up and taking the warm room in, a roaring fireplace and a simple warmth that made the place feel like home. Where am I? The place is as familiar as it is foreign.

A glance out the window shows there's snow outside but it's surprisingly comfortable inside. I go to run my hand over my face but I pause and examine my hand... there's no scars or wrinkles... how?

"Comrade?" I look up and am met with warm whiskey eyes.

"Roza?" I move with a speed that my body shouldn't possess any more but she is in my arms before I can process it. She's so warm and soft, I bury my face in her hair, taking in her scent with a soft sigh. I pull back to cup her cheek and she smiles warmly. "Roza." I sigh and lean down to kiss her.

After all of these years... to taste her again. There is nothing better than having her in my arms again. She pulls back a hair and smiles my favorite sweet smile.

"Hi."

"Hello." I smile widely. Her smile is blinding. God, I'd forgotten how beautiful her smile was. I take her features in then, her beautiful, tangible, unforgettable features.

"I missed you." I sigh softly, pulling her in for another kiss.

"I know you did, comrade." She murmurs. "Thank you, for all you did for my family, for taking care of my niece like you have, you don't know what it has meant to me." She pulls back to smile, even as her eyes fill with tears.

"Having you in my arms again makes it all worth it." I respond softly. She hugs me tightly and I hold her to my chest, taking in her scent and relishing in the feeling of finally, finally being back in her arms. It had been far too long since I'd last held her.

"Come with me." She murmurs and steps back a bit to wiggle her fingers at me in invitation. I nod and take her hand, she leads me through a door and on the other side stands everyone, even Ivan. A happiness I didn't know existed lightens the load on my shoulders as I take a moment to process the scene.

My blood family, save Vika and the kids, are all here, all beaming. I'm immediately engulfed in my mother's arms before being passed around to tear filled greetings. With assurances of an eternity, I turn to my adopted family.

Lissa and Christian embrace me tightly, both whispering their thanks for what I had done for Little Rose. Both are eager to hear more about the child they'd left behind. When they step away I I turn to my best friend and brother

. It's amazing to see him after all of these years and still know that he knows me better than most. One secret handshake and a tight hug later, we pull back with a laugh.

"So you met the one." Ivan jokes I smile and wrap an arm around her, pulling her close. The moments we were separated were far too long for my liking.

"I did." I answer him before turning to her, I press a chaste kiss on her lips. "I love you." I murmur. She giggles softly, hugging me tightly.

"As I love you." She smiles.

"Welcome home cousin." Adrian tilts his head in our direction, Syd curled into his side. Eddie and Mason both leaning on the opposite wall with pleased smiles. I can't help the grin that stretches across my lips as I glance down to the love of my life cuddled into my side, arms wrapped tightly around me.

Yes. In a life that held more disaster than anything, it was truly good to be home.