Previously on Rewriting History . . . Damon and Rebecca were arguing about Vicki, but eventually came to an agreement to search for her after the sun went down.
Chapter Eighteen
Rebecca stayed at the boardinghouse with Damon since she'd agreed to and she wasn't a liar by design. In the middle of the day she got a text from her dad wondering where she was. She ignored it and cut her phone off.
What had happened earlier, plus everything that had happened the day before caught up with her and she had to chill for a while. She needed rest.
"You were right. Going after Vicki on my own would've been bad."
"I usually am right," Damon said, smirking. Then more seriously, "How're you feeling?"
"Just tired." And shaky and erratic, she added silently.
Then, to her embarrassment, her stomach growled. Even she heard it, so she knew Damon could.
"And hungry," Damon said, amused. "When's the last time you ate?"
"Uh . . . Two days ago?" She grimaced. "I've been a little preoccupied."
"We have food. What d'you want?"
"You can cook?"
"Yes."
"Um . . . Okay. Well, I don't know. Surprise me. Just nothing with blood in it." She grinned at him and he smirked again.
"Funny. Wait here. Rest."
"I can't even move to get a book?" she teased.
"Mm, I don't know. It's just fraught with peril." He reached over and ruffled her hair and she scowled at him and tried putting her hair back in place. "Go find you one you want. You can have it if you want it."
She smiled softly. "Why would I take it with me? I'm probably going to be over here a lot more than I'm gonna be at my house." Then she backtracked. "Uh . . . if that's okay."
Damon saw her uncertainty flash in her eyes and he realized he was obviously doing something wrong if she couldn't tell that he wanted her with him, if she couldn't tell she didn't need to ask to come over. She was welcome whenever she wanted to be here.
"If you want to be here, you can be here. Day or night, okay? Now I'm going to go fix you something before you pass out."
Even when he was in the kitchen he could still hear her heartbeat; he'd always been very attuned to it.
He wanted to fix her something more substantial but the quickest way for her to get her strength back up was to get the nutrients she needed so he fixed her a fruit salad with a sweet creamy dipping sauce. Apples, strawberries, grapes and sliced bananas. Besides, he knew she liked fruit anyway, so it wouldn't matter to her that that's what he had fixed her. He'd cook for her some other time when she didn't have so much to think about.
When Damon went back into the living room with the food he saw that Rebecca was laying on the couch looking better than any woman had a right to. Yes, her color was a little off because of the attack the day before, but, other than that, she was fine. Her body would've allowed her to be on the cover of a swimsuit magazine, and the fact that she was still in his shirt - and only his shirt - made it hard for him to concentrate.
She was leaning on the arm of the couch reading, like she'd said she was going to do.
"What'd you pick?" he asked.
"Call of the Wild, Jack -"
"London," Damon finished for her. He watched as she marked her spot with her finger. "That's one of my favorite books."
"Hm." She sat up straighter to give him room to sit. "We had to read the Cliff Notes in English once; I never got around to actually reading the book until now.
Damon handed her the salad. "Here, eat."
Since Rebecca had been talking about school it hit Damon how young she really was, how hard it would be for her. She didn't have a future, not really. It had been taken from her. Her choices had been made for her. She wouldn't be able to go to college or have a job or any of that. She wouldn't be able to have anything normal at all.
Not that she seemed to mind at all - she was spending the majority of her time with a vampire.
By the time night had fallen, Rebecca had eaten twice and had taken a nap once. Damon and Rebecca went to Elena's thinking that was probably where both Stefan and Vicki were. Rebecca knew Damon was more interested in finding his ring and his phone than he was in finding Vicki, but finding Vicki would help him find his stuff, so . . . Ergo . . .
When they reached the two story white house Damon handed her the keys and she looked at him, confused.
"I want you to stay here. I'll be faster on foot and since you're still not at one hundred percent . . ."
"Okay." She grinned when Damon furrowed his brow in disbelief. "What? We had this conversation earlier and if I disagreed we'd just argue again. We have bigger fish to fry."
"Hm. At least you've gotten your priorities straightened out."
Rebecca slipped the keys into her pocket when she stepped out of the car and then they walked up to the front door. Rebecca knocked and they waited. She could already sense that Stefan wasn't there, which meant that Vicki wasn't there.
When Elena opened the door she tried closing it again. Jeremy was behind her and he looked at her like she was insane, but he listened when she told him to go upstairs. Rebecca could tell Elena wasn't only frightened; she was also pissed. Probably at both Damon and Rebecca, but mostly Damon, who was standing there, the perfect picture of indifference and nonchalance.
"You're afraid of me," Damon said, amused.
Rebecca internally groaned. Here we go again.
"Stay away from me," Elena seethed.
"Hey, hey, hey. There's no need to be rude. I'm just looking for Stefan. May I come in?" Damon pretended to wait, but then, "Oh, wait. Of course I can. I've been invited."
Elena backed away as Damon went in and Rebecca muttered 'be nice' loud enough for only him to hear before she followed him in.
"Look, we can cut to the chase if you want. I'm not gonna kill you right now. That wouldn't serve my greater agenda."
Rebecca wanted to say he wasn't going to kill any of her friends if he knew what was good for him, but she let that lay for the time being.
Damon glared at Elena defiantly, and Rebecca had to be impressed that Elena glared back. Impressed because Damon was intimidating and Rebecca wasn't sure that she could do it if she weren't the Slayer.
"Now, where's Stefan?"
"He's out looking for Vicki," Elena said, hatred lacing her voice.
Damon pretty much just rolled his eyes at her. "Don't look at me with those judge-y little eyes. The girl's gonna thank me for what I did."
Rebecca looked at Damon sharply. What was he doing? He hadn't really done anything, really. It had been an accident, right? So why was he saying all that? It wasn't his fault or anyone else's; it had just happened.
Damon had moved forward and Elena was trapped between him and the wall. Rebecca knew from experience that that wasn't a good place to be, but Elena was holding her own.
"Did you thank Katherine?" Elena asked, glaring up at him.
Rebecca moved closer because she wasn't sure how Damon would react to that. She didn't know how Damon felt about the Katherine situation now. She knew Damon hadn't wanted to turn even though Elena probably didn't. Stefan wouldn't have incriminated himself by admitting what he'd done.
Rebecca was relieved when all Damon did was look at Elena, and he didn't even look angry; though sometimes he was good at hiding things like that.
"Hm." Damon turned away and his face was expressionless. "Got the whole life story?"
"I got enough."
"Oh, I doubt that," Damon said, closing himself off now. "Anyway, tell Stefan I'm looking for him."
Rebecca watched as Damon went out the door, but then he came back in smirking. "Oh, for future reference, be careful who you invite in the house."
Then he was really gone.
"Are you okay?" Rebecca asked softly.
Elena shook her head. "What's wrong with you? He's . . . something's wrong with him. He's dangerous and unstable and he threatened me!"
"No, he didn't. But, yes, he is dangerous." She stepped forward. "Look, I don't want to fight with you, okay? I'll explain whatever you want me to explain. All you have to do is ask."
Elena shivered a little and Rebecca could see that Damon had affected her more than she'd let on. Elena led Rebecca to the kitchen, though, and she began to make some coffee.
"Okay." Elena sat at the table and Rebecca followed suit. "How long have you known? About Stefan and Damon?"
"A few days after school started."
"Why didn't you tell me?"
Rebecca scoffed, but was gentle when she spoke. "Would you have believed me if I had told you that Stefan needed to drink blood to survive? That's he's been around since the late 1800s?"
Elena shut her eyes and looked down. "Why did Damon tell you the truth when Stefan couldn't tell me?"
Rebecca could tell that Elena was worried about Stefan not trusting her just like Rebecca was worried about Damon not trusting her.
"Uh . . . Elena, have you talked to Stefan about anything?"
"I spent the day with him. He explained some things."
"Okay, well, why don't you tell me what he told you and then I'll fill in the blanks. Okay?"
Elena looked up at her and Rebecca could tell she was wondering if she even wanted to know, if she could deal if she knew.
"He told me that Katherine could control his mind . . . And Damon's."
"Yes. She made them, compelled them, to love her like she wanted them to." Rebecca swallowed nervously. "Did he tell you about me?"
It suddenly occurred to Rebecca that she didn't know exactly how much Stefan knew about her, how much Damon had let Stefan in on that. She knew Stefan had to know she was a Slayer - he was a vampire, part of him would be able to sense that - but how much did he know about Slayers? And how much of the past had Stefan told Elena about and how much was Rebecca part of it?
"He knows that you love Damon."
"Yes, but did he tell you why?"
"No."
"Okay, uh . . . I know that you already have a lot on your plate, so if at any time you want me to shut up, I will." She looked Elena right in the eyes. "I was there."
"What?" Elena obviously hadn't expected that.
"Um . . . I read a spell out loud. And I realize that sounds really cheesy and unrealistic, but I was reading from a spell book and I woke up in 1864. I met their father - ugh! Horrible, horrible person. I staked a vampire in front of him and, since he knew about vampires, he invited me to stay with him. That's when I saw Stefan. Imagine my surprise because I'd met him here in my time period first."
Rebecca paid close attention to Elena's face to make sure she wasn't going to go into shock. She was also absentmindedly listening to make sure Jeremy stayed upstairs. As a Slayer she had advanced hearing - not vampire hearing, but it was still more advanced than Elena's or any other human's.
"Damon didn't get there for a while so I got to know Stefan a little. Uh . . . Once Damon got there I hung out with both of them. Damon and I -"
"You loved him when he was human," Elena interrupted, apparently having a revelation. "That's why . . . That's why you let him get away with a lot of stuff."
Rebecca looked at her hands, debating. She'd never really thought of it that way.
"Um . . . Okay . . . I did love him when he was human, but I accept him the way he is now, too. He still has some good in him, Elena, he just has to find it again. And I wanna help him do that. But I don't . . . love-love him now. I'm still getting to know whoever the hell he is now, but I am in very deep like with him."
"But he's . . . a . . . murderer."
Rebecca flinched. "So am I. Are you gonna toss me out on my ass too?"
"You kill vampires, that's not the same thing."
"Yes, it is. I'm still ending someone's life. It's exactly the same thing. I even like it, Elena. It's wrong and I tell myself I shouldn't like it, but it doesn't change the fact that I enjoy it a little. I'm even good at it."
"You . . . get off on it?" Elena asked cautiously, inching away.
Rebecca laughed a little. "Wouldn't go that far. And I don't hurt innocent people, so you can relax. You and Jeremy are safe. Anyway . . . Back to the past. Questions? Comments?"
"Did Damon love you?"
"He never said it, but we were very close, yes. We had an instant connection. He was very good to me. Until Katherine came." Rebecca couldn't help that her voice was bitter. She'd learned to hate Katherine.
"And Damon left you," Elena assumed and Rebecca became infuriated.
"He didn't leave me. She took him, compelled him to forget about me. I didn't know it at first . . . I just thought he'd lost interest, and I was willing to let her have him if she was what he wanted. I wanted him happy even if that happiness didn't involve me. When I found out about that compulsion I confronted her, but it didn't help. She wouldn't leave him alone. She was doing the same to Stefan.
"She compelled Stefan to drink from her, but, because Damon thought he loved her, Damon did it willingly. They died with her blood in their system, so they . . . had to choose."
Rebecca bit her lip, wondering if she should edit this part. It wasn't really her story to tell, so yeah, she should, she guessed.
"Um . . . When you're in transition the smell of blood will cause you to lose control. Uh, something happened and I got hurt. I was bleeding badly and Damon couldn't help it. Stefan had . . . Um, he'd bitten me - he couldn't help it either, I guess."
"Stefan turned with your blood?"
"No. Damon turned with my blood. Stefan had already turned when he . . . Anyway, Damon stopped before he killed me, obviously, and he healed me. That's one of the reasons Damon doesn't get along with Stefan; he hurt me."
The rest of the reason was Damon's story to tell if he chose to.
"Did Damon ever do his mind control thing with you?"
Rebecca was going to say no, but then she remembered he had. "Once. But that was only because I'd hurt my shoulder really badly and he had to check to see if it was broken. He didn't want me to feel the pain when he did it."
Elena looked on in disbelief.
"I told you, he doesn't hurt me on purpose, no matter what else he does."
"Uh, yesterday!" Elena's eyes widened as if she couldn't believe Rebecca could just get over that little fact.
"He was starving!" Rebecca exclaimed. "Which is your boyfriend's fault, by the way!"
Elena looked away from her and then Rebecca watched her shoulders slump. Elena was exhausted, she could tell.
"Can I get you something? Um . . . Tea, coffee, chocolate, ice cream? Um . . . Or sleep, if you want."
"No, we have to wait. Stefan's supposed to call when he finds Vicki."
"Oh." Rebecca bit her tongue so she wouldn't spill about how exactly what had happened wasn't Damon's fault. Vicki had died by accident with his blood in her system but she hadn't been killed.
"Um . . . What're you gonna do about Jeremy?" Rebecca got up when the coffee stopped brewing and poured herself a cup. She fixed Elena one too; Elena's was easy - she liked her coffee black. "If Vicki comes here he will invite her in and if she chooses to turn that means she can come over whenever she wants."
"One problem at a time, Rebecca, please. I can't even . . . think about that right now. Okay?"
"Okay. Just . . . I love you guys and I don't want anything to happen to you."
Elena nodded and stood up with her coffee. "I'm gonna go outside. I need to be alone right now."
"Uh . . . Okay . . ." Rebecca stood up and grabbed Elena's shoulders. "You just found out there are vampires in Mystic Falls and you're gonna go outside at night and sit on the porch swing?"
"Yes. I'm not gonna stop living my life because of this. Now, please, I just . . . I need to be alone so I can think."
Rebecca nodded and let her go, reluctantly. She would feel if a vampire came by and she'd hopefully be able to respond quickly enough to help. Besides, Elena was right. She couldn't put her life on pause just because she knew the big secret now.
Damon had been tracking Stefan for thirty minutes. He could tell Stefan had been tracking Vicki. There was no trail of corpses to follow so he assumed Vicki hadn't turned. He ended up at the old cemetery and when he stopped he was able to hear a gunshot. Because he was a vampire it sounded closer than it actually was, but it gave him a direction to head in.
What he found was an upset Vicki - she was obviously remembering things now - a hurt Stefan, and an annoying human. Logan Fell, some news guy. He had a gun in one hand, a stake in the other. Stefan had been shot and was getting ready to be staked.
So he knows, Damon thought, and that just automatically leads to killing.
Damon expertly ripped the guy's throat out and then casually went about getting the bullet out of Stefan's chest. He couldn't have his brother dying; who else was he going to make miserable for the rest of eternity?
He ignored Stefan's groan of pain - it was Stefan's own fault for not indulging once in a while. He'd heal faster if he drank human blood.
Once the bullet was out Damon felt like groaning himself.
"It's wood. They know." Then, "If anyone's gonna kill you, it's gonna be me."
Damon got his ring back from Stefan, who seemed very reluctant to give it to him. He got his phone back too, but that was after Vicki fed from Logan. The guy had been bleeding; Vicki couldn't help it.
"Oops."
Damon didn't really care. He had what he wanted. His phone, his ring, and Rebecca. So he left Stefan there and took off, but not before he found the Gilbert compass. What had Logan Fell been doing with it?
He had one voicemail from Rebecca, one from Caroline - what the hell was she calling him for? - and then a few texts from Rebecca. He read the texts first because he saw that Stefan had obviously pretended to be him through the phone.
Hey, something's come up. I have to leave, don't know when I'll be back.
That had been Sunday morning, two days after the Founder's party. They way the text was written made it sound like he was giving her the brush-off. That pissed Damon off because he wouldn't just do that - or not with Rebecca anyway. If something came up and he had to leave, he never would've just taken off, not with her. He would've told her face-to-face that he had to leave and, hell, he'd have offered her the chance to go with him. They both would've enjoyed the ride.
Her text to him after that had been: Are you okay? Or do you need help?
And Stefan hadn't even answered back. What must Rebecca have thought of that? Him just not even responding. He needed to give Stefan a major ass-kicking because that just wasn't the way one treated a woman like Rebecca.
Ignoring her, telling her I was just leaving without a word, Damon thought moodily. Probably made her feel about an inch tall.
Her other text was about Caroline: Did you compel Caroline to forget, because the other day she was freaking out and now it's like she can't even remember it happened. It's creepy.
Then for the voice messages. He deleted Caroline's, not caring enough to hear what she had to say. Rebecca's, on the other hand . . .
"Okay . . . Look . . . I'm not good at this, so . . . Uh . . . Are you okay? Because I know you and you wouldn't just ignore me if you didn't have a reason. So . . . Whatever it is . . . If I made you angry or uncomfortable then I apologize. But you need to tell me what I did because I'll probably do it again very often if I don't know that it bugs you. Anyway, call me when you can. I wanna know you're okay."
Damon glared at the phone as if it was to blame. How dare Stefan make her think it was her fault, make her feel like an insecure little girl. Mm . . . how much more damage had his dear brother caused? Rebecca had definitely looked like she'd been through a lot when she'd come to him the day before.
If Stefan had done that to her - even if he'd done it unintentionally - Damon was going to become very anti-social, because until that night Damon had been fairly nice to Elena; Stefan couldn't pay him the same respect with Rebecca?
At Elena's, Rebecca had left Elena alone like she'd wanted Rebecca to. But that meant that since Jeremy was the only other person there at the moment that she was once again curled up beside Jeremy in his bed. Granted, this time she was comforting him. He'd been with Vicki that day and he was worried because she'd been on something and wasn't coming down. She'd been hungry and couldn't get full and her gums had been hurting, throbbing. They'd gotten her upstairs and she'd been fine for a while, but then she'd freaked out.
"She even had this super PCP strength," Jeremy said. "I don't know what's wrong with her. There was this thing on TV about a drug deal gone bad at that old cemetery. We were there last night."
"Drug deal? Were you . . ."
"No," Jeremy said defensively. "We were just partying."
"You got stoned in a cemetery?" Rebecca couldn't stop the small grin that pulled at her lips. "How disrespectful."
She began rubbing his back in small soothing circles when he didn't respond. She knew he was really worried about Vicki, and she couldn't tell him what was really going on.
"Come on. You need to sleep. We will find her and help her. Or she'll find you when she's ready, okay? But you won't be able to help anyone if you're falling down with exhaustion."
Jeeze, shouldn't Elena be up here doing this? Rebecca thought. But then again he probably wouldn't have accepted this from Elena. Sometimes Rebecca wondered if Jeremy blamed Elena for their parents' deaths.
"Okay," he mumbled, already shoving his head onto the pillow. Rebecca was stunned by how young and vulnerable he looked. It made her heart hurt because she knew he wouldn't be seeing Vicki for a while - or at all if the girl didn't turn.
She got up to leave him to it, but he grabbed her wrist. She looked down at him, confused. "What?"
"Will you stay until I fall asleep? Please?"
Rebecca swallowed back the throat burning sensation of unshed tears and sat back down. "Sure, Jer."
She smoothed the hair back from his face and began rubbing his back again. She knew he didn't let Elena or Jenna do this for him; he probably didn't even let Vicki.
"This is gonna sound really strange, but having you around right now makes me feel safe," Jeremy said softly. "It's almost like having my mom back."
Rebecca smiled softly, fondly, even through the tears. "In this scenario I am your mother? I can't just be your long lost sister from another family?"
Jeremy didn't speak, but he did smile tiredly. She leaned down and kissed his forehead much like his mom must've done when he'd been younger. She stayed with him until his grip on her wrist loosened, until he'd fallen asleep.
Then she got on his computer and brought up the local newspaper website. She wanted to know what Jeremy had been talking about - the drug deal thing - because Damon had bitten Vicki, and Vicki had been at the cemetery so that meant Damon had been at the cemetery. And that meant that whatever cover-up the town was going with was . . . Whatever Damon had done.
Damon doesn't want you to know. Don't look.
Rebecca thought about it and realized that actually Damon probably wouldn't care if she knew - he had just told her not to feel guilty because he had done it, not her. But she had to know what he'd done because it would bother her until she knew.
Three people had been killed and burned - though the article said it had been an accident. Damon had had to try and cover his tracks. He wouldn't have had to be so sloppy if Stefan hadn't locked him up, damn it! And now . . . Now, assuming the Council was out in full force, they knew there was at least one vampire in town.
She looked at Jeremy and said a small prayer of thanks that he at least hadn't gotten hurt; he'd obviously left before Damon had gotten to the cemetery.
Rebecca could feel that Damon was outside now, probably waiting for her, and he was with his brother. Maybe they hadn't come together but they had shown up at the same time. Rebecca sighed, cleaned the computer's history so Jeremy wouldn't know she'd been on it, and then looked at Jeremy to make sure he was still asleep. The covers were drawn up to his chin and his hands were tucked underneath.
She went to the window, opened it, climbed out and closed it back. She was now on the ledge that was between the first and second floors of the Gilbert house. She stepped off the edge and landed easily in a crouch so as not to hurt herself.
Stefan and Damon hadn't budged, though they both were watching her. Elena, who was still on the porch, had looked stunned for a second but then had turned her attention back to Stefan. Stefan, who was bleeding - Rebecca was concerned because she hadn't done it this time. What exactly had happened?
She subtly brushed her hand against Damon's when she reached his side - she noticed he had his ring back - and he looked at her. She gestured to Stefan with her head and he shook his head. She was a little surprised she hadn't had to ask if he'd done it; he'd just known from the simple gesture she'd given.
That was . . . pretty awesome, actually.
"I couldn't stop her," Stefan said. "I tried."
Rebecca's shoulders slumped even though she'd sort of had a feeling Vicki would turn. Now . . . Now they'd have to help her, teach her, if Vicki would let them.
"What does that mean?" Elena asked. She was new to all this, she didn't know.
"It means she's a vampire now, Elena," Rebecca said gently.
"She fed. And I lost her."
"Why didn't one of you follow her?" Rebecca asked. "She's going to be hungry and she's not going to know to get out of the sun before morning."
"Well then, problem solved," Damon quipped.
"Uh, not funny." Rebecca glared without any real malice. "One: Ow! And two: Someone could see. Trust me, a girl spontaneously bursting into flames will rate very high on the six o'clock news."
"Well, I'll take care of it," Stefan said. "I will find her and teach her how to live like I do. I'll make sure that she doesn't hurt anybody. I promise."
"What do I tell my brother and - and Matt?" Elena asked, beginning to freak out.
"We'll come up with a story."
"You mean we'll come up with a lie," Elena corrected.
"Well . . . Actually, if she'll let us help her," Rebecca began, "she could go back to being somewhat normal within a few weeks. Uh, Jeremy wouldn't have to know anything unless Vicki told him."
"No. I don't want him involved in this," Elena said firmly.
"He lives in the same house as you do. He's gonna get involved one way or another," Damon said seriously. "The longer you keep it from him the more danger he's gonna be in."
"I don't want him involved with this," Elena repeated. "He's just a kid."
"Uh . . . Okay," Rebecca said. "Well, if she shows up here, don't invite her in. If she shows up and Jeremy invites her in because he doesn't know what she is -" Rebecca was hinting at the fact that Elena shouldn't keep Jeremy in the dark "- don't bleed in front of her. And don't make her angry, don't threaten her. Don't do anything that could be considered antagonistic. She's new and volatile. She could snap over the least little thing."
"Well . . . You're not staying?" Elena asked.
"I have to go home. I haven't been there for two days. And my phone's been off today, so my dad's probably freaking out. It's an argument waiting to happen, but I need to go get that over with so I can deal with this."
"You are gonna stay at home and sleep," Damon said, taking her arm and beginning to lead her to the car.
"Uh, hey!" She yelled bye over her shoulder to Elena and then followed along willingly enough. "Damon, you don't have to drag me everywhere, you know. All you had to say was 'I'd like to leave, please.' You'd have gotten the same result."
He opened the door for her and she got in. Damon wasn't in the best of moods for some reason so she was silent. She'd wait for him to speak. If she asked, he'd probably just be sarcastic about it anyway.
Once he parked at the end of her street he took out a very familiar compass. Where had he gotten it? He couldn't have stolen it; she'd been in Jeremy's room when Damon had gotten to Elena's house.
"Logan Fell had this," Damon said. "He found Stefan with it."
Rebecca's shoulders tensed because she knew that meant Logan was dead now. Damon wouldn't have let him live, not since Logan had known. And, since he'd been a Fell, he would've run back to tell the Council.
"Logan used to go out with Jenna, uh, Elena's aunt. That's probably how he got it."
"Hm." Rebecca noticed that Damon looked uncertain. It unnerved her a little. "Okay," he sighed and rolled his eyes, "there's this thing, so I'm just gonna say it. And don't make me repeat it. What Stefan did . . . to make you think I left, and the message you sent . . ."
Rebecca grimaced internally. She'd left that before she'd figured out that he wasn't gone. She watched his fingers curl tightly around the wheel and she could tell he wasn't used to doing this, explaining what he was feeling. She waited patiently for him to continue. She knew if she said anything he might not finish.
"I didn't like that you sounded that way," he said tightly. "That he made you feel that way, made you think it was me making you feel that way."
He looked at her now and his blue eyes were unexpectedly gentle and so . . . human. It made her breathing hitch. He swallowed vulnerably and her eyes glanced at his throat, which she felt a fleeting desire to kiss and lavish affection upon. Then she focused on his eyes again.
"Look, I know I can be an ass, okay? But I would never just ignore you. Trust me, I hear everything you say even if I don't always respond the way you want me to. I don't want you to feel that way in relation to me, ever.
"I can't promise to always do the right thing and I definitely can't promise to say the right thing -" Rebecca grinned because, wasn't that the truth? "- but you will never be ignored when I'm around. One could say I'm obsessively observant of everything you do."
Damon couldn't believe what he was doing. He was baring his heart to this beautiful girl beside him. It hadn't set well with him, hearing her voice be all small and insecure. That wasn't who she was. It also hadn't set well with him that he could make her feel that way. That meant he had too much power over her and that wasn't healthy.
As he'd talked he'd kept a check on her expression - if he'd seen any sign of amusement, he would've stopped talking immediately. He would've flipped the switch and shut her out completely. He wouldn't have been able to take it if he'd opened himself up to her and then she'd made fun of him for it. He would've snapped and someone would've gotten hurt.
He'd seen hesitation on her face when he'd mentioned the message and he wondered if she regretted leaving it. But other than that she hadn't commented at all; she'd just listened, just let him speak, let him say what he'd needed to say - or needed her to hear him say - without making him feel like he couldn't. Or shouldn't.
It made him remember how easy it had been to be himself around her when he'd been human, how natural it had been for them to be close, be together. It . . . terrified him yet made him feel a little safer at the same time.
Damon Salvatore, terrified of a seventeen-year-old girl, he thought wryly. What has the world come to?
He was surprised when Rebecca cupped his cheek and then pressed her lips to his, softly. It was short and chaste, but he could feel the love behind it. It was pure and almost innocent, Rebecca's love at that moment, and Damon didn't know how to respond to it.
Damon had had many people touch him in his very long life, but mostly it had been out of anger or lust. It had been to cause pain or to take pleasure from his body; it had never been to comfort or love him.
He found himself wanting it, her love, more than anything in the world at that moment, but his conflicting emotions couldn't settle on whether he should pull her closer or push her away. It wasn't in Damon's nature anymore, just to accept good things - there was always a catch. When good things came along he just waited for the other shoe to drop.
"Becca . . ." he whispered and then clenched his jaw to shut himself up.
"Shh." Her thumb caressed over his skin and he fought back a shiver. Damon Salvatore did not shiver from a girl's touch. He didn't shiver, period. "I know. That was very difficult for you."
"Mm." Understatement of the century; he knew because he'd been there.
She kissed him again with the same love she had before and he wanted to melt into it, but she pulled away - now he felt like pouting like a child; he wanted it back.
"Thank you," she said, stroking his face once more before removing her hand. "For letting me in a little."
He wanted to tell her it wasn't a problem but it was for him, and he didn't know when he'd be able to do it again.
Rebecca sighed and he looked at her; he realized she was procrastinating, putting off the inevitable.
"Okay, well . . . I guess I gotta go. But, assuming I still have my phone, I will call you in the morning. And I'll come help with Vicki after school. Uh, if it's safe."
"Yeah, okay." Damon bit his cheek but then figured - what the hell? - he'd already said worse, so, "And Becca? You're welcome."
She smiled a little wider than she had in a while so Damon figured it was well worth it.
Okay, here's the latest, though this one was just a prelude to the next one, which I will probably update in a few days. I really need to focus on my Supernatural story. LOL. I've been slacking there.
Let me know what you think about this. Thanks!