The next day, I went to breakfast with my feet trailing. I purposefully stumbled past the Gryffindor table and slipped my hand around Harry's stomach, dropping the cloak in his lap. I kept walking, ignoring Hermione's "What did that prat want now? Doesn't he realize that the Ravenclaw table is literally in between our tables?"

I dropped my pathetic ass on the seat next to Pansy, knowing full well that if I ever needed a way to hide my emotions toward Potter, Pansy had wanted to date me for the past four years. Of course, that was the coward's way out, and a Malfoy was never a coward. At least, that's what my father said. Besides that, it would simply be plain cruel to use my friend like that. I returned her cheery "Hello!" with a tired grunt. A slight issue in that my pyjama bottoms had suddenly become the slightest bit too small last night had kept me awake for another hour until I finally took care of the problem. Even after that, I didn't get any sleep because I couldn't stop thinking about the way Potter's hands felt against mine. His, rough and calloused, mine, smooth and soft. It was yet another reminder of how vastly different our lives were. A small reminder, but a reminder nonetheless that kept me up all night thinking about all the other differences in our lives. For example, his future entailed Harry killing him and saving all of wizardkind, whereas mine was supposed to require me torturing him into insanity to make him easier to kill. So that he couldn't fight back.

I was dragged out of my thoughts by a large waffle floating through the air and landing on my plate with a plop. I looked up as two sausages came whizzing down the table, also landing on my plate. All the other Slytherins looked insanely confused, but I just smirked and took a few bites of each sausage and the waffle, then turned my head to the right in the hopes that the person who had sent the food to me was watching my throat as I downed my strawberry milk. As I felt my own Adam's apple bob up and down as I swallowed my milk, I wondered if the term "bobbing for apples" really came from a children's party game, because given all the time I had subtly stared at Potter's throat, I had decided that there no way that those were the bobbing apples the name referred to.

In fact, as the thought ran through my mind, I turned to watch Harry wolf down his meal as he always did the first two months of school. I had always thought it sloppy, but I now realized that he did what he had to do to survive. If he didn't eat like that, he would probably starve to death. However, this time, as I went to watch the way he licked his lips after bite, I locked eyes with him from two tables away, and saw nothing but his eyes as they glared furiously at me. "More," he mouthed, clearly disappointed in my small meal.

Oh, but Potter, if it weren't for my small meals, I wouldn't be half as good at Quidditch as I am. Besides, my father said that his great health came from tiny meals. Which was odd for him to say, as I'd never seen him eat a small meal in my life. But whenever I tried to eat my fill, he would rebuke me, saying that I must want to end my athletic career and any prospect of being someone successful, because no one would hire someone who didn't even take responsibility of my own health. Thus, my stomach couldn't ever hold more than an eighth of fifth year Avery's average dinner, which typically consisted of some (honestly hella rad) mashed potatoes, corn, some more potatoes, a couple slices of ham, more mashed potatoes, and then, if she had room, for dessert, mashed potatoes with a shit ton of butter. She really loved mashed potatoes. She was, ironically, Irish. She had bright red hair. No hand me downs, so she clearly wasn't a Weasley. She was a Todd though, the ancient Scottish Gaelic word for fox. Todds were traditionally hunters, but Avery loved animals with all her heart.

Avery was honestly fully adorable, and if it weren't for my infatuation with Harry, I would probably like her. She was Muggle-born, but was in Slytherin because she had begged the Sorting hat to put her there, because her four snakes would be so happy that she got into the snake house. After arguing with her for three minutes, the hat finally gave up and placed her in Slytherin. She clearly belonged in any house but Slytherin. She was the most patient person I had ever met, and loyal in the "hurt my friend and I will fuck your shit up" way. She was constantly doing crazy stupid things, like when the first years were learning the basics of riding their broom in a straight line, and she did it flawlessly. Upside down. The first time. And when she succeeded, she immediately started doing a bunch of daredevil maneuvers. That was literally the first time she had ever been on a broom. She also had by far the best grades of anyone in her year. The only way she was cunning is when she saw Crabbe making fun of her Gryffindor friend Rhiannon Morgana, and slipped him a Polyjuice potion the next day that turned him into Loony Lovegood in front of everyone at breakfast. That made everyone but the Golden and Silver Trios a laugh. As soon as I saw the stony expression on Harry's face, I stopped laughing. He looked fully ready to kill Avery for using his friend as a punishment.

Avery was still a good friend, although I did give her some tips for better revenge, which were actually things less likely to make Harry angry. Everything I did was because of him. Which reminded me of the plate in front of me. I tried to take a few more bites, but felt as though I would puke. The house elves were coming around gathering any stray plates that hadn't yet made it to the kitchen.

"Mr. Malfoy, sir? Have you finished your meal yet? Dobby is sorry if he is rushing you, please take your time, sir." I looked down and smiled as I saw my old friend before me.

"No, Dobby, I'm finished. You can take my plate." As I moved to leave for Potions, Dobby called me back.

"Have you gotten Harry Potter to fall for you yet, sir? Dobby apologizes if it is none of his business, but Dobby has not seen either of his friends in so very long." The house elf's ears drooped, and I felt a stab of guilt. I had missed him too, and while I had heard that he had been employed here, it had never occurred to me to go visit him.

"I promise I'll come visit you soon, Dobby." Dobby's mouth stretched wide in a grin, and without another word, he gripped my plate and Apparated to the kitchens. It was unfair that house elf magic could Apparate them, but wizard magic couldn't.

Entering the Potions classroom, still not tardy as Slughorn still hadn't arrived. Harry was already sitting at the desk next to mine, and my heart jumped as he slid his hand up my back as soon as I sat down.

"Any better today?" he asked. I shook my head and whispered back, "It happened in late July. I think this is the best it's going to get."

Slughorn entered then just as Harry was preparing to speak again. I huffed in frustration; we had been having a civil conversation, which was rare for us. We continued studying our Amortentia that class, then as I was about to leave, Harry slipped me the invisibility cloak and murmured into my ear, "Keep it a few nights. In case you need it for something." Then as he walked away, he paused in the doorway, looked over his shoulder and bloody winked at me. He winked, smirked, and went out the door with a dramatic flourish.

I didn't see him again until lunch, where he and Hermione were crowded over the paper Harry had had the night before. They pointed at one corner, muttering quietly to each other. Wondering what they were looking at, I wondered if I could somehow slip on the cloak and go over there to look without being noticed. But then Harry tapped the parchment with his wand while reciting some incantation, and even from two tables away, I could see that the ink was fading away. I made a mental note to try asking Harry about it again later.

I was suddenly brought back to reality when I felt… was that? Yes, a sandwich was repeatedly hitting me on the head. I reached back and grabbed it, then, looking Potter dead in the eye, ate exactly half of it before I couldn't take another bite. Harry narrowed his eyes at me, then as he turned away, all the sandwiches in the Great Hall came flying at me. Harry was very powerful with Wingardium Leviosa. Could do it nonverbally, without his wand, was very accurate on his target, could lift multiple things at once, and could do it all without even looking at the objects. In all honesty, it kind of turned me on. In my defense, it was better than anyone else in our year could do. It may have been a basic charm, but most wizards just learn it and use it on occasion for incredibly basic tasks. Harry had fully mastered the charm, possibly better than Flitwick himself. Who, I noticed as I glanced at the professors table, looked positively confounded by the hundreds of sandwiches floating midair directly above my head.

Harry must have charmed the sandwiches in some special way, because they followed me around until dinner, when they disappeared with a pop as soon as he walked in. He walked over to where I was leaning against the wall, and leaned toward my ear. Shit. Not only had I been spending all day thinking of other creative things Harry might be able to use his levitation skills on, now he was standing about two inches from me, his warm breath making my hair flutter. If he came any closer, he would most definitely find out how I felt about him if his leg were to brush against my… thigh, that's a safe thing to go with. I'm sure no one is confused about what I mean by thigh.

"Maybe if you would eat more, I wouldn't have had to do that," he growled huskily. His voice had dropped an octave, and I let my fell weight rest on the wall, before my legs gave way beneath me. "Remember that no matter what anyone thinks about you," and here his voice got even lower, "I care about you Draco." With that he backed away, his green eyes shining with some emotion I couldn't place. He glance down at my lips for a millisecond, then licked his lips as he turned away. My knees buckled, and I quickly made my way to a seat before I collapsed completely. Pansy gave me an odd look as I panted as though I had just ran from the top of the school. In reality, I was panting due to the fact that Potter had practically caused me to have a terrible mishap in front of the entire school. In fact, my pants were entirely too tight. Like, about to tear too tight. I slowly caught my breath, then looked up at Potter, who simply smirked at me, a lopsided, knowing smirk. Shit. He knew, didn't he? He must have brushed up against me and I had been so hard I didn't even feel it. Or so distracted by his breath tickling my face or his gravelly voice, which was a turn-on in itself. Then Harry grabbed a hot dog from in front of him, and, without breaking eye contact, slid in smoothly into his mouth and slowly bit a part off. He licked his lips seductively and licked the length of the hot dog before taking another bite.

Haha, fuck you too Potter. He was just making fun of me, of the silly crush he knew I had on him. I flipped him off with zero subtlety and saw Snape smirking out of the corner of my eye.

"Pansy, I am not going to be the cause of Harry Potter's death! Because we both know that if he knew, he would kill him because he would assume that Potter's mocking him. But when are you going to ask him out? Because it's so obvious that he likes you back!"

I briefly wondered who Avery was talking about, because I knew it couldn't be me, given the whole "Obviously madly in love with Harry Potter" thing. I was sure that everyone knew. Probably even long before me.

I ignored my meal, having already eaten almost twice as much as I typically do in a day. Even though food kept flying onto my plate and occasionally attacking me, I just ignored it as all the Slytherins wondered who kept doing that. Eventually, I pick up a small marshmallow from one of the dessert items Potter had placed in front of me and placed it between my teeth, then sucked it into my mouth. I laughed in glee as Potter dropped his spoon into his bowl of soup and his mouth dropped open.

After dinner, I relaxed in the common room with Blaise and Pansy. Pansy kept badgering me like a Hufflepuff (heh, look at me with my Hogwarts humor. Wonder if Potter would have been impressed with that top notch pun.) with questions about my plans for our next trip to Hogsmeade. I kept slithering my way out of answering with a witty joke to Blaise. Avery eventually came over and dragged Pansy away to look at some theory of hers about Quidditch strategies. Avery was our wonderful Keeper. I was still Seeker, but I was keeping an eye out for someone to replace me after I graduated. I was incredibly unprepared to graduate. I had no idea what I was going to do after I graduated. I was supposed to have had my career options picked out last year, but I had been a little preoccupied being suicidal on balconies and then obsessively watching Potter whenever I got the chance.

When I woke up the next morning, I was already too late to go to breakfast. Not that it bothered me much, but still. I quickly got ready then rushed down to Potions.

"Mate, why didn't you wake me?" I hissed at Blaise as he ambled past.

"I tried!" he retorted. "You just kept muttering about how you couldn't do it, that you wouldn't." I froze. I had been talking in my sleep? I had been having a dream about having to kill Dumbledore. How much had I let on the past few days?

As Potter breezed in, his glasses askew and hair as unkempt as ever, he sat next to me and immediately said, "Hermione reminded me this morning that you never explained why you tried to kill me. You should try to explain that soon or I might change my mind about helping you." And with that, he turned to his work, not looking up for the rest of class.

When the bell rang, he was the first out the door. I waited until Blaise was ready to leave, then walked with him to our next class. I skipped lunch when the time came, opting instead to visit the common room to try to think of ways to get to Dumbledore. I didn't want to do this, but I had to, or he would kill my family. He would do it if I refused to torture Harry too. So I needed to do that, and soon. Before I got in too deep. I didn't necessarily care if he killed my aunt Bellatrix, but my mother cared deeply about me, and I needed my father to teach me life lessons. To me, it seemed more like him hitting me whenever he got angry, but I never complained. If he thought I needed to learn it, then it must be something important that I would need in life. Aunt Bellatrix was expendable after she killed Harry's dogfather, I mean godfather, and offered me up to torture Harry and kill Dumbledore.

I recalled how I tried to help Harry last year. Giving him the hint that my father had seen Sirius, and hinting that Hagrid was with the giants. The second one he didn't get, the dense fucker, but he tried to get Sirius to be more careful. I knew he blamed himself for Sirius' death, but if we were being more realistic, it was more mine than his. I had overheard my father talking about this, and I should have warned Harry somehow. I will never stop regretting it. I should have told Harry I had known, but I was so scared that he would kill me, or worse, he hate me for all eternity. I could tell him soon. I should tell him soon.

I couldn't torture Harry. That much was obvious. But I had to at least try. Which meant I needed to start distancing myself from Harry. From now on, no words were to be exchanged in Potions, I would return the cloak, and not tell him anything about me ever again. I had to make him hate me before I could do this. I had to make him think I hated him.

I never was a good actor. How could I pretend to hate Potter when all I wanted to do whenever I saw him was put one hand on his chest and push him up against a wall and grab the front of his shirt and kiss him? I had thought about kissing Potter in many different ways. Hard and deep, long and slow, a quick grazing of the lips, nothing but tongue, and one of those kisses that I had read about in books. The ones where it's raining and they're fighting and then one of them screams that they love the other and they pause and then start making out in the rain before Apparating to one of their houses and, uh, not getting any sleep, to say the least.

I often wondered if Potter would have loved me if I had been in Gryffindor. I had wanted to be for a long time until I had it drilled into my head that Slytherin was the only house worth being in. But if I had been a Gryffindor, I would have made sure to become friends with Potter. And I would have played pranks with Fred and George. If I had been able to help them last year in their war against Umbridge, I would have. I would have been on the Gryffindor Quidditch team, working alongside Harry. I could have been brave enough to ask him to the Yule Ball in fourth year. I would have gone straight to him when I solved the basilisk mystery instead of leaving it where Hermione would find it, with the word pipes scrawled across it in her handwriting. I would have helped Potter defeat Quirrell. I could have helped him save Sirius and Buckbeak, however he did it. And last year, I wouldn't have hesitated to tell him what I had overheard, and if he hadn't listened, I would have gone with him and I would have been the one to fight Bellatrix and die for Harry's sake instead of Sirius. I would have done so many things differently if I had been in a different house. I wouldn't have to be loyal to Slytherin and pine for Harry from afar, I could have helped him and given him all my love and loyalty. Would he have loved me then? Or would he still have dated Cho?

I eventually got up and stopped thinking about "what if's". He didn't love me and I had to stop loving him. And I not given a single thought as to how I was going to kill Dumbledore. I decided to skip the rest of my classes and just hide under Harry's cloak on my bed until tomorrow. I read a book, did some writing of my own, tried to do some more planning, then daydreamt about Harry and, being sure that no one was coming, enchanted a paper to draw an animation lasting a few minute of me and Harry together in my bed, and it changed a little every round. I was quite careful to not need to give Harry's cloak a wash; I always packed a few dozen extra socks for this exact purpose.

Then, it being about 7:30, I settled down into my bed after taking care of all I had done that afternoon. I didn't lay under any blankets, just under the cloak, which surprisingly held all the warmth I could possibly desire, and was careful not to let it show that I was laying there.

I slept a peaceful and dreamless sleep for the first time that week.

Please let me know what you think in the reviews! This part was kind of long, which I'm sure none of you mind, but the next few parts are kind of short, I'm afraid. Sorry! If you have any ideas for characters, please submit them, because I figure I should add some more characters of my own. I need a few from each house, but primarily Slytherins. I'll need full names, gender, eye color, hair color, skin color, and house. If you think of anything else that's important to add to that list, just add it in.