Chapter 13: Ruin

"Baby, you and I got history (history)
And we can't deny our chemistry (chemistry)
So why the fuck are we a mystery? (Mystery)
Let's just go with the connection, give me your affection
You're only brave in the moonlight
So why don't you stay 'til sunrise?
Your body's looking good tonight
I'm thinking we should cross the line
Let's ruin the friendship, let's ruin the friendship
Do all the things on our minds
What's taking us all this time
Let's ruin the friendship, let's ruin the friendship"

-"Ruin the Frienship" Demi Lovato

Kagome set her cup of tea down on the little table she was sharing with Daichi, grateful for the comfortable silence that his family's wing of Sesshomaru and Rin's estate was providing. The main branch was probably enjoyably quiet now as well, she supposed, having just waved the majority of those who had attended brunch off. They'd been made aware of the increasing severity of the winter storm after they'd all gotten reacquainted and were sitting down for the meal, the head of staff at the estate quietly informing the room that in a few hours the roads to and from the mountains would be shut down, and it was suggested that everyone be prepared to leave after the meal was over.

Kagome had been distractedly coddling Shippo's youngest child, a year and a half old little Momoko who was the exact replica of her father, when the announcement was made. It hadn't been a surprise to her, the notion that officials were declaring the windy roads there unsafe. There had been a terrible accident there the last time the weather had turned like this, killing five and trapping a young child alone in the car for days until they'd been able to locate the automobile under a particularly large embankment of snow. She'd almost missed it when Inuyasha had come out of nowhere, kneeling between herself and Shippo in an attempt to get her attention without interrupting. Momo, with her sweet green eyes and infectious smile, had been playing a bit of a game with Kagome, correctly naming Kagome's mouth and nose and eyes and then cutely asking for a kiss every time she got one right, then returning the favor. Kagome had sensed him only when he was right next to her, her spiritual abilities still frayed from the massive auras in the room and had attempted to turn her head to look at him, but Momo had insistently been repeating her best pronunciation of her name as soon as her eyes were off of the little girl. "Gagome," and then for the sake of a time a short, "Gago" was the best she had, but it was still persistent and a bit frantic from the very second the baby had seen Kagome's gaze travel away from her. But, like magic, as soon as Momo had laid eyes over Kagome's shoulder, her frown instantly curved upward, and she'd tried to climb out of her arms with a shrill "Yaya," that was aimed at the half demon.

Kagome would pick on him about the name later but, in the moment, she had been rather distracted by the way he had leaned his face down into Momo's waiting hands and immediately kissed her on the forehead while cooing a "hey there, baby girl." He was such a family man, something Kagome had known but never seen, and she'd been rather transfixed as he'd politely asked the toddler to give them just a moment, easily convincing Momoko with a promise that she could sit with him for the rest of the meal when she pouted. He'd pulled her out into a hallway after Momo had slipped out of her arms and back to her father, and that was when Inuyasha confirmed what Kagome had been thinking. He was already planning on them staying the night, if she was okay with it, a little worried about making it back into the city with his car and certain it would be much too cold for her if he just ran them back. Inuyasha's car was nice, nice as in expensive and luxurious, but it was hardly an all-terrain vehicle, and despite how good of a driver he was, he'd still looked worried as the whole car had slid on the way up a couple of times. Kagome had easily agreed, already planning on calling her mother and filling her in on her whereabouts once she had a moment, knowing it would include a brief explanation about who she was with as well.

Brunch, once she returned to the room, was wonderful. She hadn't been able to meet everyone that she was sure she would have, Sesshomaru's youngest child Tenzin and Shippo's son and daughter in law, Hayate and Hiruka, having all had their flights home delayed. But that was fine, Kagome thought, because that made only four new people that she had to meet. There was, of course, the little Momoko and her mother, Sakura. Momoko was a replica of Shippo, except for stature. She wasn't as small as Shippo had been, more closely resembling a typical human child's size. Sakura was a stunning humanoid neko demon with platinum blonde hair and bright blue eyes, her heart shaped face radiating a respect that Kagome had not anticipated. She'd crossed the sitting room that was full of family and immediately wrapped her arms around Kagome, a very enthusiastic "it's so nice to meet you," pouring out of her in an emotional rush. Kagome hadn't had time to decipher why, her attention having clearly been sucked away as soon as she'd noticed the little girl pulling at her leggings, Momoko quickly demanding to know who she was.

The next new face was Sesshomaru's only daughter, an exact replica of his mother, the only exception being her clearly furry ears peaking out from underneath her thick mane of hair. She, like Tensho and Daichi, had hers where Kagome's own ears were, and Kagome was curious to know if anyone in this family looked like Inuyasha. Misana had her mother's kindness and her father's respect for personal space, just offering her a warm smile upon introduction. She was mated to handsome wolf demon with a million dollar smile and sharp green eyes that almost made Kagome flinch with how perceptive they were. Katsuo was his name, the only child of Kouga and Ayame and an exact replica of his father, with the obvious exception of his eye color. He didn't say a word to Kagome, merely nodding in greeting to her before giving Inuyasha a cross look.

Kouga and Ayame had a similar sort of sourness about them when they'd spoken to Inuyasha, though Kouga was abundantly warm with her as always. Kouga looked fantastic, Kagome decided, however she restrained herself from saying anything out loud. He had grown into a genial sort of man, a soft smile on his face when he approached, almost exactly the same as she had remembered him save for the lone streak of grey in his still long black hair, dressed in a casual sweater and pair of jeans. Ayame had barely aged, to Kagome's surprise, still looking just as young as ever, prompting Kagome to remember that she had known an adult Kouga when she had been a child, the age gap more obvious now that they'd had so much time pass. They were a lovely match, both incredibly kind and welcoming to her as she conversed lightly with them. However, as soon as Inuyasha had finished speaking with Sakura about Shippo's whereabouts and rejoined her, they both fell into a sort of stilted silence that Kagome found herself angling away from. It was that awkwardness that drove her to use Daichi's return a few minutes later as an excuse to leave the room, surprised to catch Inuyasha and Sesshomaru both talking to Kouga and Ayame with frowns on their faces when she'd glanced back, the first time she'd seen the patriarch angry since she'd been there.

Sesshomaru was made for this life, she decided. He was clearly the kindest of fathers, nothing but warm and loving to everyone in his family, having given her an actual smile when she'd greeted him that day and expressing sincere interest in what she had started doing for work since he'd last seen her that May. Kagome had the distinct impression, however, that being on the receiving end of his disappointment would be crushing, which probably explained why his family was so devoted to meeting his expectations. In fact, when he mentioned that she might consider asking her stepfather if he had a position available at his company, Kagome found herself actually debating if she should bring it up to Kyo the next time she saw him. Sesshomaru knew him, somehow, and was familiar with what his company did. He assured her that it would be a good place to properly start a career in business, and that it would make sense for her to work with her stepfather. There was more to it than just Sesshomaru's concern for her career path if she stayed in sales, however. It was the fact that she had just gotten an email from her company trying to go against the two month contract she had signed to be at the training center and send her to America for a conference the day before Christmas, her return not being scheduled until after the New Year. The problem was that she had specifically agreed to the two months at the training center because she needed to be at the shrine on New Year's, and she knew it was a violation of her contract and her religious rights to be made to work the conference they'd booked her for. Kagome had paid attention during her orientation, and she knew she was well within her rights to have the holiday off to attend to her family shrine, the same way she had done every year since she was born. She had yet to tell Inuyasha about it, trying to decide if she should get a lawyer involved when the company had refused to honor her contract before bringing it up to him, but the brief conversation with Sesshomaru had brought the idea to her mind once more. She'd ask them both later, then, she'd decided, before running it over with Kyo as well.

She and Daichi had made their way to the dining room after the tension just inside the room had become too much to handle, Shippo and his family closely following them. Misana and Katsuo joined them only moments later, and just after that Tensho and Kari as well. It was fine, better than fine if Kagome was being honest, the room brimming with the sound of several conversations at once, the noise level only increasing as everyone else joined them after about 10 minutes. Kagome had already gotten comfortable with Daichi's family on one side and Shippo's family on the other, good conversation flowing amongst them as they nibbled on some fruit that had brought out from the kitchen. It was why she hadn't moved to sit next to Inuyasha once they'd finished discussing how long they'd stay there, automatically falling right back next to Shippo and picking back up where they'd left off. Inuyasha hadn't seemed to mind, taking a seat that was diagonal to hers instead of directing her down to where it seemed Rin had wanted them. The good atmosphere lasted until the end of the meal, everyone making their way to the covered walkway that led to the garage after. Shippo and his mate insisted Kagome come and eat dinner with them the next week, to which she eagerly agreed. She didn't want to say she was partial to Shippo because that wouldn't be fair to Inuyasha, but Shippo had always been her family, and the same was true now. She loved him, his mate and his little girl instantly and deeply, grateful to hear they would be buying a home in the same neighborhood that Kyo lived in and staying in Kyoto until Momoko was in college.

Kouga and Ayame had kept their distance from her after whatever exchange took place between them and the two oldest males of the family. Kagome would have to remember to ask what Inuyasha had spoken to them about later, but they'd been friendly enough as she'd said goodbye, stating rather assuredly that they would be in contact with her soon. Kagome wondered about that, about the little aggression there, especially as she'd caught Inuyasha's harsh glare at Kouga's words. Misana and Katsuo had politely said farewell, the former giving Inuyasha a tight hug and Sesshomaru a kiss on the cheek, before departing with Katsuo's parents.

Daichi's parents had already been staying at the estate, and Daichi had apparently planned on staying for a few days once he found out that they'd be there for the rest of the month, having only spent the previous night in Inuyasha's apartment. That left Kagome and Inuyasha, Rin and Sesshomaru, and Tensho, Kari and Daichi all staying within different wings of the home, Inuyasha having insisted he and Kagome occupy his former wing while they were there so as not to impose any further.

As soon as the cars disappeared, Daichi turned to Inuyasha and asked, or rather demanded, a training session, adding that he wanted it to be with the tessaiga because Inuyasha owed him. To her surprise, he readily agreed, but Sesshomaru cut in to say he needed to talk to Inuyasha for a while about work and asked if Daichi would give them an hour or so. Daichi couldn't say no this grandfather and agreed that he would wait about two hours before heading to Inuyasha's wing before turning to Kagome and asking if she'd like to talk for a while.

It's how they found themselves here, tucked in comfortably at the kotatsu. Rin and Kari had disappeared somewhere, and Tensho was with Inuyasha and Sesshomaru. It was private, the first time she'd been alone with Daichi in months, and Kagome was rather glad for his company. They'd been talking for a while, Daichi having asked for her take on what had happened 500 years ago and Kagome sparing absolutely no detail. He needed to know the complexity of the situation in truth, needed to know about Kikyo and Inuyasha, deserved to know about Kouga's devotion to her, Kagome feeling absolutely bent on explaining her tight friendship with Sango and Miroku. This wasn't just about Inuyasha, it wasn't just about her. There was so much more than them, so much loss and pain and Kagome needed Daichi to understand that. So, she'd told him everything. The dreams, the panic attacks, the crippling desire to just be normal. The way the bright red warm up suits of the men's track team at school had almost trigged a meltdown, how she'd stopped talking to a friend after they'd dyed their hair the trendy silver grey because it was just too painful. Kagome had never stopped loving Inuyasha, even when she was with Hiro, her pain never truly going away. Inuyasha had understood, mainly because he had known loss abundantly as well, but Kagome needed Daichi to understand.

Daichi asked about the rumors, then, asked about how she turned from the priestess into the party girl, and Kagome told him the absolute truth. She had been rattled with the loss of almost everyone close to her and made some poor mistakes, but not the all of the ones Daichi had assumed she did. Kagome also set the record straight about her relationship with Hiro and the rumors it had caused. Daichi…he'd been less than impressed with the idea of Kagome posing so intimately for a man and those images being circulated publicly, but a quick google search showed him it was all done in good taste, and her modesty and identity were well preserved.

"So," Daichi began then, Kagome having caught Daichi up to when Inuyasha surprised her at the coffee house. "Are you sleeping with my uncle then?" Kagome choked on her tea, having gotten lulled into a false state of security with the calm they'd just reached.

"NO! Kami, Daichi, where the hell did that come from?" Kagome was wide eyed as she said it, surprised he would consider even asking her the question.

"I told you, Kags, you are absolutely covered in his scent." Kagome looked down at herself, unable to take in the scent of anything but her laundry detergent and shampoo.

"No, Daichi, I am not sexually involved with Yash." She rolled her eyes with the statement, picking her tea back up for a sip.

"But you're attracted to him. Sexually." It was followed by a long slurp of the green tea he'd decided on for them, a noise Kagome wrinkled her nose at.

"I'm sorry, have you seen your uncle? Anyone would be sexually attracted to him."

"Great uncle, Kagome, as in if we were both human he'd be like 80 something."

"Daichi. Come on. You cannot possibly think giving me the 'he's ancient' line is going to work now, after all this time. I know how old he is, thank you. Doesn't shut it down, sorry." It didn't. Kagome theorized that his uncle status and dedication to his family only kept things going. Seeing him sending off the little Momoko, seeing how in love she clearly was with him, it did something to her that she was probably going to have to answer for later.

"Has he seen those pictures you showed me?" The swift change in conversation signaled Daichi's distaste for the topic, and Kagome wanted to enjoy her time with him so she played along.

"Maybe." Kagome shrugged. "I told him about them, I'm sure he could find them if he wanted."

"So, he knows…everything?" He emphasized the word like it meant she should have something to hide, but she didn't.

"Everything, everything. Yes. Why bother hiding it if he's adamant to not have a relationship with me?" Kagome shrugged. It wasn't her only reason for telling Inuyasha, but she didn't want to explain to Daichi the depth of their confidence in each other.

"Shut up, you guys are already in a relationship as far as I'm concerned. I'm just saying, you've only been with, what, two people? And the first one shouldn't even really count. And he's been with…who the hell knows how many, and he was married, and he tried to do a bonding ceremony on her. It feels uneven." He simply shrugged his shoulders with the statement, but Kagome got the distinct impression that he was still bothered by the topic of their sex lives. Which was odd because he kept bringing it up.

"Daichi, that really doesn't matter. No when we won't be having that kind of relationship." Kagome shook her head side to side with the words.

"Oh, shut up, Kagome. Don't give me that load of horse shit. What did you say to me about Kira? A chance at happiness is worth fighting for, true love is worth the risk or some crap, right? Well, back at ya. You are his mate, Kagome. I don't know how the hell he's gone this long without doing something about it, but it's true. Anyone with two eyes and a brain can figure it out." He was still her Daichi, under all the discomfort of the situation, still trying to look out for her no matter how much it pained him. It brought warmth to her heart to know that he still loved her underneath all of it, their friendship looking more and more alive as the conversation kept going.

"I don't think he feels anything like that for me, Daichi. Not on that level. Mates sound almost impossible to resist and he's quite good at keeping a distance from me." Annoyingly so, with the exception of last night. But, Kagome theorized, you couldn't really count that because he was drunk. It was the same reason why she'd shrugged off what he said about wanting more from her.

"It's possible to resist your mate, if you're scared you'll hurt them. Dad took two years to finally get with mom for the same reason. Uncle knows you're his mate, he's probably just not admitting it to himself yet. I'm not happy about this, but I can't rightfully say you can't be with him, because fate has other plans. Why else would you and I be born within hours of each other at the same hospital, why would I become so close to you, why would you decided to trust me and leech off of me? Fate, Kagome. You are fated to be with him. Even if it makes me want to vomit."

"Daichi…you're way off base here. Inuyasha has said-" He cut her off with a quick wave of his hand.

"I don't care what he's said, Kagome. He's holding back on you with every ounce of strength he can muster. I can see it. What's your hold up? You clearly care for him, he's so deeply interwoven into your life that it seems like you love him a lot. What's stopping you from falling in love with him? If you stop fighting, he'll find it a lot harder to keep fighting."

Kagome looked down at her now cold tea and sighed, trying to find the right words.

"He's not my Inuyasha. I'm pretty sure I will never be in love with someone the way I was in love with him again. I was going to leave my family and stay with him, Daichi. That isn't something to sneeze at. He was it for me. And while he's theoretically the same person, I can't see him as my Inuyasha, I can't fall in love with him in the same way."

"Then fall in love with him in a different way." Daichi said it like it was the most obvious solution in the world.

"I don't want to fall in love, not now. It hurts, losing someone like that, losing out on life with them. And then with Hiro, that entire relationship was riddled with issues. Who wants their fiancé to go on dates and go drinking to hide their relationship, only to end it because of the going out and the bar hopping? I was a mess when that ended, mostly because he put me through so much under the pretense of a happy ending. I'm tired of hurting, I just want to be happy for a while."

The words had brought a natural end to the conversation, thankfully with perfect timing, the sliding door to the entrance of the wing opening just as Kagome was about to pour herself some of the tea that was still warm in her kettle, Daichi having insisted they each had their own. It was Inuyasha, a folder in his hand and his laptop bag that he'd left in the car slung over his shoulder.

"Hey kid," he was looking at Daichi as he said it, having not spared Kagome as much as a smile. "I've got some work to do before I can train with you. It'll take an hour or so, but I need Kagome's help with something before then. You okay with me stealing some of your time with her?"

"Even if I said it wasn't she'd still get up and go on her own, so yeah, why not. Meet you at your wing in an hour?" Inuyasha nodded at Daichi's words before sticking a hand out towards Kagome, pulling her up behind him and out the door, Kagome waving to Daichi as they left.

"What do you need help with?" She'd asked it after they'd walked all the way back to where she knew his wing was, Rin having pointed it out earlier that day.

"Nothing, I just wanted to snag you away." He winked with the statement, helping Kagome over the little part of the walkway that was snow covered and opening the door into the thankfully warm wing for her. "He can't tell when I'm lying, nose isn't good enough. But you can, it's why I didn't look at you, you'd give away my master plan."

"Sneaky," was all Kagome could muster as she walked up the few steps in the foyer of the wing and waited for him to join her, somehow feeling like she shouldn't enter on her own.

"I want to show you something." Kagome hadn't even agreed before he'd quickly pulled her into the home and down the hallway before turning the corner into a room, surprised to find the fire rat she'd come to associate with him displayed beautifully on the wall. The tessaiga was above it, the kotodama perfectly preserved in a shadow box on the wall. The entire wall was littered with items Kagome wanted to get a closer look at, but she couldn't find the strength to look beyond where the fire rat was delicately hung. Her hand came up on its own to cautiously run over the garment. It was the same coarse fabric she remembered, somehow soft and warm even as it was on display in what was apparently Inuyasha's office. A frame not too far from the red fabric caught her eye then, and she was surprised to see a painting of her hanyou there. It was really her hanyou though, the still young Inuyasha with the fierceness in his eyes that she remembered, his hair pulled up on top of his head in a long ponytail. He looked like a replica of his father, she realized then, suddenly recalling the way that Toga's spirit had looked so long ago. Now, as she stared at her Inuyasha's image, the fire rat adorned with an amour so closely resembling the Inu no Taisho's, Kagome could understand how the slim half demon she'd known had grown into the proverbial hulk behind her. Her hand ran over his image of its own accord, her eyes snapping shut at she fought against the final onslaught of the day, so very tired of crying, so very much wishing she were anywhere but here.

"Oh, baby," he'd whispered the words, pulling her to him instantly, his body around her as if to shield her from the pain. "I'm so sorry, I thought it…I thought you would like to see all of this, I didn't even think." It was too much, she realized, because like she'd told Daichi, she'd fought for so long to see this man as Yashiro, not Inuyasha, and she'd separated the two in her mind. He was radically different, not only in temperament, but also in appearance. He wasn't a scrawny kid anymore, and Kagome had spent many an hour analyzing the differences in his clearly adult male form. But now? This, this was it, the missing link, the lines blurring irreparably between the two entities, Inuyasha and Yashiro merging into a single person that made her chest ache in a way she hadn't known it could. She had known, obviously, that he was the same boy that she had been in love with, now a man. But this felt like she was finally accepting it.

Kagome, on her own accord, had pulled away from Inuyasha's body just enough to look at him, really look at him, her hands coming to his face in the same kind of awe she'd felt so many months ago when he'd first taken his glamour off for her. She traced the angle of his jaw, ran her fingers over the height of his cheek bones, her own eyes taking him in as if it were the first time. He was so handsome, his bright gold eyes staring down at her without judgement, clear and patient as she took what she needed to from him, his only movement being to press a soft kiss to the palm of one of her hands, his eyes not leaving her own as he did so. His skin was smooth under her fingers, the same sun kissed tan she remembered, his nose the same regal one she'd admired years ago. Her hands traveled to his neck, thumbs running over his chiseled jaw line once more as she finally brought herself to her toes and wrapped her arms tightly around his shoulders. There were words on her tongue, words she'd told him before, words that were ringing incessantly in her head, words that, somehow, now, meant something more than she was willing to share. Instead, she pushed them down and waited for her control to return, lost in the feel of his arms on her body, the brush of his lips against her cheek as he tried to console her, sweet words and apologies lost on her ears.

When she'd finally calmed down, taking a deep breath in as she pulled away for good, she'd asked where the restroom was in the wing, wishing to clean up her now streaky and puffy face for what she hoped was the last time that day. He'd taken her to it before excusing himself to get ready to do whatever he and Daichi usually did with the tessaiga. Kagome took only a moment to wash her face, finding it almost impossible to get rid of the permanent redness around her eyes but trying to temper it with the cold water from the faucet. She returned to his study, taking time, then to look over the rest of the things in the room. Oddly, most of them were paintings and photos, all of him with other people, or of other people entirely. There was one that gave her pause, one that made her stop more than the others, the portrait of a young woman with blue eyes and blonde hair and European features that Kagome quickly identified as belonging to his wife, Sophie. She was beautiful, and her chest clenched painfully to think that she was once the most important person to Kagome's most important person. It was a strange juxtaposition, that bite of jealousy with the overwhelming surge of love she'd just felt, and it was too much, then. Too many emotions, too many thoughts. Too much.

She decided heart had enough, then, and she forced herself to remain calm as she plopped onto the tatami mats and surreptitiously scrolled through social media on her phone, deciding that was the safest bet for the time being, allowing herself to get distracted by some recipe video willlingly. Inuyasha came into the room after only a moment, wearing just a pair of black hakama he'd apparently decided was all that he needed, and Kagome had to physically shut her eyes at the sight of him. He'd never affected her like this before, and while part of Kagome wondered if Daichi had slipped something into her tea, she knew him better than that. She was feeling this way on her own accord, her short-circuited emotions deciding to let her body run itself for once and it was having a field day. Inuyasha was triple take hot, want to kiss every inch of his body hot, couldn't stop staring at him hot. Kagome couldn't breathe around him, couldn't think, the mix of emotions having just wrecked her for the rest of the afternoon. She was sitting on the floor, trying to no avail to get the image out him shirtless and in her bed from last night out of her head, but Inuyasha was, obviously, having none of her avoidance. He'd pulled her up and into his arms again, trying to console her, clearly seeing through her guise.

"Just some space for a moment, Yash. That's what I need." It wasn't entirely true, Kagome wanted him to leave so she could go throw up in the bathroom down the hall from the stress, but it was better than admitting that she was physically reacting to him a way that was decidedly not normal. He'd conceded only after she'd opened her eyes to look at him, pretending it didn't make her stomach clench painfully, stepping out onto the porch under the pretense of warming up for his time with Daichi. Kagome watched him walk, barefoot and deliciously shirtless, into the snow before she decided it was safe enough to place the call to her mother that suddenly felt urgent.

Mama Higurashi had taken the news fairly well, seeming, more than anything else, to support Kagome's decision in keeping close with the half demon. Apparently, she'd already assumed he was Inuyasha, which shocked Kagome. It was how he'd helped her move, her mom said, the woman having dropped in just as Inuyasha had walked up the stairs easily carrying a table from her mom and Kyo that had taken two people to load onto the truck. Kagome hadn't thought anything of it at the time, and Inuyasha had been rather busy trying to get all of her crap into the new place. Neither of them, she supposed, had noticed how closely her mother had been watching. She only asked that Kagome take the time to have herself and Souta over for dinner one night, so they could become reacquainted with the man. Kagome had almost expected her mother to caution her against the relationship, and she said as much.

"Honey, if I found out your father was still alive, miraculously, I would drop everything to go to him. I would be disappointed if you weren't doing this, in both you and Inuyasha, because then you wouldn't be realizing how rare of an opportunity this is. How many people can say they lost someone, in this sort of way, and gained them back?" Kagome had moved to the glass paneled sliding doors to watch Inuyasha warm up, finding enough courage with her mother at her ear to study his form as he moved.

"I just…I'm here, he's outside, and he's…it's like I'm just realizing for the first time that he is Inuyasha. I've known it for months, but now I'm just…mama I don't know what I'm feeling but I can't even look at him without thinking I'm going to die if I don't touch him." Kagome was watching Inuyasha's ears then, relieved to see that neither was trained on her, the knowledge that every wing of this house was soundproofed from the others replaying in her mind from the tour that morning.

"If you want my honest opinion, baby, I'm telling you to go for it. What you're feeling is the reminder of it what it felt like to lose that man, I know it's overwhelming. But look at him, Kagome, and realize that he is alive, and he isn't going anywhere." Her mother had been right of course, and Kagome spent just a few more moments talking to her before she felt comfortable enough to ask to speak to Souta, explaining the situation to her younger brother having proven to be more difficult than she had imagined. He'd been angry, rightfully, but as Kagome explained Inuyasha's reasoning for giving her so much space, he'd fallen silent, and Kagome took it as him contemplating what she was saying.

"Listen, sis, I'm not going to sit here and tell you I don't want you to see him, because we both know you're going to do whatever you want. I love you, Kagome, I want you to be happy. Just be careful." Kagome had blinked at her brother's thoughtful warning, telling him that she loved him in return before hanging up the phone, having decided to turn it off for the rest of the day and hide it down in her bag. She opened the glass door enough for her to lean against the frame after taking a moment to reapply some makeup, which is where she had stayed since, replaying the events of the day as she watched Inuyasha move.

Kagome remembered the way she'd felt the first time she'd seen him this year, the way his mere gaze had set her on fire, and she theorized that was probably the only time, in their friendship, that her body had reacted to him appropriately. They'd spent so many months trying to reach this state of having grown beyond their past, and now, for Kagome, they were here. It was like her mind and her heart were finally giving her body the go ahead and it was losing its damn mind. It was as if every twitch, roll and flex of his muscles were sending her into a heat stroke, Kagome unable to look away as he, finally, unsheathed the tessaiga, going through a series of movements with the sword before letting out an adamant barrage and stopping Kagome's heart. Her mind was showing her the image of the half demon she'd been in love with using the same move, holding the same sword, in the same state dress, before he morphed into this man, the final piece of the puzzle sinking into a heat that pooled low in her stomach. He was a mighty man, all rippling muscle and chiseled jaw, something Kagome had fought herself to not notice the night before, the way his back muscles undulated as he hefted the tessaiga over his head causing her heart to speed up uncontrollably. Kagome was so busy appreciating the curve of his ass when the wind blew against his person that she didn't notice that he'd turned his head around too look at her, his body gone in a flash only for him to reappear right in front of where she was standing, the tessaiga once again sheathed at his side.

"What are you thinking, cheeky wench?" His words were low, not holding an ounce of the playfulness they usually did, his arms having come to rest on either side of her body on the door and frame distracting her with the way his biceps moved as he applied his weight to his hands. He'd been standing in the heavily falling snow, but he was still warm beyond common sense, his presence almost causing her to feel like she was in the middle of a furnace. Kagome heard, rather than saw, him inhale before he groaned, the unpleased sound drawing her attention back to his face as he leaned almost unnoticeably closer to Kagome. "Fucking hell, woman. Are you trying to kill me?" Kagome's hands weren't listening to Inuyasha's clear discomfort because they'd gotten a mind of their own and had been slowly tracing their way up his arms, appreciating the way his body felt as they finally found purchase on his chest, the hard plains there under velvet smooth skin causing Kagome's head to spin.

"La petite mort, maybe." La petite mort, the little death, the sensation of blacking out from a powerful orgasm. In a flash, Kagome found herself hoisted up, her legs wrapped around Inuyasha's waist as he took a few steps into the home and mostly shut the door behind him, her torso flat against his own and her body suddenly wishing she'd worn a thinner shirt and a less padded bra, just to get closer to him.

"Kagome," he breathed her name as she wrapped her arms around his neck and wove her fingers through his hair, her hanyou pushing her up against a solid wall just inside the door. "This is dangerous, love."

"Don't care," she'd murmured back before she pushed his head forward and crashed her lips to his own, putting everything she had into that kiss, being as clear as she could about what she was feeling. Her boldness paid off as Inuyasha groaned and moved one of his hands from where he had a hold each of her thighs to angle her lower back forward just a hair more, pushing them impossibly closer together as he took control of her mouth, the sudden switch of pace causing Kagome to gasp. He was so hot, he kissed like a god and Kagome was having a hard time remembering why the hell she'd ever let him stop kissing her last night, or even that night weeks ago. The thought was enough for Kagome to unthinkingly deepen their kiss, Inuyasha's accompanying growl sending a shiver up her spine that titled her head back as it reached her neck, the movement causing her to break the contact she had with him and the sensation bringing his name to her lips with a whisper of a moan. "'Yasha," he steadied them as she said it, moving in such a way that she'd have to angle her body unnaturally to capture his lips again, deciding instead, in her hazy mind, to plant a few kisses to the underside of his jaw slowly, placing more along the line of his neck as he tried, but failed, to catch his breath above her.

"Kami," he breathed it as she hit a particularly sensitive spot, and Kagome went back to it to press a longer open mouth kiss there, briefly wondering how he'd react if she gave him a little mark of her admiration there, a bruise the shape of her mouth for anyone to see, but deciding to run her tongue along the length of his jugular instead. Kagome could feel him shaking around her, was unsurprised when she was lifted up a little higher as he turned to let his back hit the wall, sliding down to sit on the floor. She was straddling him, then, his hands on her body keeping her there, and he was clearly struggling to find a semblance of control but failing. Kagome took the opportunity to recapture his mouth in her own, having tuned out anything but the feel of his skin on hers and the way her heart was being in her chest. He gave in, then, to her pressing advances, if only momentarily, Kagome feeling the undeniable pressure of his hands squeezing her ass as he kissed his way from her mouth to her neck. She gasped as his teeth scraped along her skin, a hand coming up to pull her high collared sweater down to give him more access, his mouth settling on the junction of her neck and shoulder as he worked on giving her a soft love bite there. It was dizzying, the little reverberations of his occasional growls, the bulge pushing upward from his lap, the smell of him all around her. Kagome couldn't help but let out a little whine, suddenly wanting less clothes and less space and less damn boundaries. But it was with that noise that Inuyasha pulled away from her with a finality that shocked her, having thought he had already given up fighting. "We have to stop sometime, sweetheart."

"We don't have to," Kagome had wanted to punctuate the phrase with a soft but meaningful pet name, coming up short with one that seemed appropriate for Inuyasha, suddenly wishing she had the words for what he meant to her.

"We do," he reprimanded, pushing his hips up to hers as he pulled her own down at such an angle that she was left gasping from the electrifying contact. "Unless, you want to give Daichi a very vivid lesson in procreation." Kagome could only look at Inuyasha in confusion, wondering what the hell he was talking about, still dizzy from the contact, but was only met with his very smug expression as he settled them into a more relaxed position, Kagome's lower back leaning against his palms as she settled her hands on his bare chest again. "Welcome to aunt-hood, Kagome. There is no privacy when there are children around, particularly when they're old enough to have hidden themselves effectively in the bushes for who the hell knows how long."

"What? He's in the bushes?" Kagome was still confused, but the idea that her best friend was hiding, watching her in such an intimate state brought her out of her stupor. Kagome went to crane her neck towards the barrier of the bushes she remembered at the end of the courtyard, but Inuyasha's hand of her face stopped her.

"Don't look," he reprimanded. "It'll give away that we know he's there, and I want to surprise him. He broke a twig with his foot, I think, I heard it crack." Kagome had nodded at his words, unsurprised when he pushed her up from his lap. "Why don't you go take a nice long bath, and get into your pajamas? You can take a nap, it might help with whatever swirly thing your emotions were doing not too long ago." Kagome had almost forgotten Inuyasha could sense auras too, until he'd said that, suddenly wondering how in tune he really was to her. "My room is connected to the bathroom, you can't miss it. I can order us in a dinner from the kitchens when I'm done with the pup, and we can watch stupid movies in bed until we fall asleep. Sound like a plan?"

Kagome didn't want to point out that he'd just assumed they'd be sleeping together, but she wasn't complaining. He was a good bedmate, warm all over, didn't steal the covers, and he let her be the little spoon all night the night before. She'd rather sleep with him than sleep alone. Especially after that kiss. So she didn't complain, didn't comment. Instead, she'd merely gone into the bathroom like he'd suggested and started a bath.

Daichi knew he was doing something wrong, knew that when his uncle spotted him he would be in for a painful afternoon, but he was still there, crouching in the bushes, his glamour on his ear to protect Kagome from sensing his aura, downwind from where his uncle was already warming up. The half demon was powerful, more powerful than anyone in his family save for his grandfather, who always reiterated they were more evenly matched than everyone assumed. Daichi had been relieved when he'd first eased around the side of the building to find his uncle running through a kata that he'd taught Daichi when he'd still been a young child. It meant what Kagome had told him was true, that the two of them weren't already neck deep in a tryst.

Daichi was confused, he didn't understand mates, but he did understand the two people the entire talk of the house was concerning, and he was trying to decide why they were so adamant to not be together.

Yash had sworn to Daichi when he was in Beijing just a few weeks ago that he had no intention of falling in love with Kagome, but Daichi thought he already had. He had watched Kagome playing with Momoko at brunch with a look so heavy Daichi felt like he was intruding just by having seen it, a barrier having been lowered that Daichi shouldn't know what was behind. Yash's eyes were soft as he considered Kagome, a dopey expression on his face that there was no way he knew he was wearing. But more than that, there was the desire, something that sparked such a shock in Daichi's stomach that Daichi wasn't sure if he could ever look at them the same. His uncle, he decided, was in denial. Yash was pushing himself to keep Kagome at an arm's length under the pretense that he couldn't have a relationship with her when his true feelings had been written right there for anyone to see. He wanted Kagome. He wanted her as his mate, as his wife, and now, as the mother of his children. Daichi had seen it, all laid out in his uncle's expression that no one was probably supposed to notice, the way he considered the scene as if Kagome was playing with his child and not Shippo's. But there was more there, one more thing that Daichi would never overlook again. It was the way Hayate always looked at his mate, Hiruka, every time she so much as graced the room, the way his grandfather looked at his grandmother when they thought no one was looking. It was plain in his expression, it was plain in how his uncle had just gone to Kagome mere moments ago even though he continued to fight his base instincts and doing so was detrimental to his cause.

Inuyasha, despite his best effort, was in love with Kagome.

Daichi was so lost in thought that he almost missed when Kagome emerged at the door, his eyes darting to her to make sure she was still doing okay, surprised to see that she looked a little panicked. His nose, he'd learned, wasn't nearly as powerful as the rest of his family's. He was only able to detect Kagome's scent and not the intricacies that denoted her mood, something he hadn't known was even possible until his father explained it was their primary way of deciphering what one another was actually feeling about a situation. But even Daichi could tell, from where he sat in the bushes, that Kagome was struggling with something inside of her mind as she trained her eyes on Yash. Daichi decided, for the sake of being nosy, to simply sit for a few minutes longer before he made his presence known.

That had, in fact, turned out to be a terrible idea, because as Daichi watched it was like the entire scene shifted with Kagome's expression. She'd been absent mindedly watching Inuyasha for some time, but her eyes were sharply on his uncle as soon as he'd unsheathed his sword. At first, Daichi wondered if it was because it had been so long since she'd seen it, and in his opinion, it was quite a sword. But no, her eyes weren't on the sword. They were on his uncle, tracing his body like the was seeing nirvana for the first time, eyes hungry like he was her first meal in a week. Daichi realized then, despite his close friendship with Kagome, that he had never seen her look at someone like she was looking at Inuyasha, the unfiltered appreciation foreign to him in her expression. But when he flitted his eyes back to watch the tessaiga unleash a signature attack that no one else was able to coax from the blade, he was surprised to see a smug expression cross the older demon's face as he turned to look at Kagome, not the reluctance he'd expected to see there if they were, in fact, trying to keep this a friendship and nothing more. Inuyasha was on her in a flash, and Daichi found himself raptly watching, like a peeping tom, as they seemed to whisper back and forth for only a moment before probably the most uncomfortable thing Daichi had ever bore witness to happened.

They were making out, with such a fervor that Daichi found himself blushing because of the clear desire between them, his eyes able to quickly discern the way his uncle was pushing himself to keep control of the situation, his arms and back tense with the effort. Was this the first time something like this had happened? Had they been dancing around this for a while and that was why Kagome had been so secretive? His uncle had tremendous resolve, Daichi decided, to be so able to have someone who looked like Kagome and that he clearly had a deep and impressive past with wrapped around him with complete resilience. But then, when he'd flipped them around and plopped Kagome on his lap it was like the man had given up, dashing Daichi's assumptions about his strength when faced with Kagome, his eyes laced with clear want and a deep passion as he'd captured her neck with his lips, and Daichi was suddenly afraid that this would be the moment his uncle truly claimed Kagome right there in front of him.

A twig cracked under his foot, then, and he hoped his uncle hadn't heard it. But, he had, it seemed, and Daichi was worried for his life.

Just as quickly as it had begun, it was over, Inuyasha leaning back and saying something to Kagome before she'd pouted at him, only for Daichi to watch in shock as she'd thrown her head back in an apparent gasp once Yash had shifted them minutely. Daichi didn't want to say it was a sexual move, because that would be opening an entirely new view of the man he respected so wholly, but it was sensual at the very least, the roll of Kagome's body suddenly reminding Daichi of what it was like to dance with her. Kagome had always been all swirling hips and sensual brushes, something that he'd never really taken the time to consider in this context before, the way it'd play into how she moved her body for other purposes. She was, despite his concern, clearly quite experienced in that arena, keeping his uncle just as fascinated with her movements as she was with his own. The half demon said something to her then, the words having shifted the atmosphere around them back to normal, before planting a much more innocent kiss to her mouth and ushering her further inside, his gaze falling right where Daichi was hiding in the bushes before he pushed the glass door open fully and moved back into the courtyard.

"Get a good show, pup?" Yash's voice was raised, finally, the now apparent couple having spoken in hushed tones his ears had not been able to pick up until then, before jumping over the space between them in one tremendous leap. His eyes said something else, though, despite his playful words, threatening him to leave them alone, angry at him for disturbing what could have taken place.

"I didn't…I thought…I was just checking in on Kagome, I wanted to make sure…This isn't just a friendship, uncle." Daichi knew he wasn't making sense, but in that moment, it didn't matter. All he could see was the way Kagome had looked at Yash just then, the way his uncle had kissed her neck replaying in his mind on repeat. No, not a friendship in the least.

"No, pup, it isn't." His uncle helped him out of the bushes then, steering him back to the courtyard that they usually sparred in. "No swords today, hand to hand." At his words he dropped the tessaiga back onto the porch, Daichi watching as he'd stared into the space for just a moment before moving back to where he'd been waiting. He knew it was a punishment for spying, he did, but he had wanted to show off to Kagome that he could transform the tessaiga, which was a big deal to him.

Belatedly, he realized that Kagome had been the one to pull the tessaiga from his great grandfather's grave, and that she'd also been there for every new power it had developed. She'd even, to his surprise, combined her own powers with it to create even more powerful attacks with Inuyasha. She'd likely be happy for Daichi, but it was inevitable that she was hard to really impress when compared to his uncle. It was enough for him to be glad they were doing hand to hand, though his uncle's posture suggested his ass was about to get handed to him.

"What's going on uncle, the truth this time, please?" Inuyasha had dropped into a defensive stance, waving for Daichi to attack him as he was ready.

"Why don't you tell me what you're thinking, and I'll go from there." They were exchanging blows already, slowly as Daichi considered his words.

"She is your mate, and you are pushing her away. Why prolong the inevitable?" Daichi punctuated the words with a kick aimed at his uncle's head, but he was too slow and met nothing but air. Instead, Inuyasha ducked underneath his legs and placed a hard hit to his ribs, the air leaving his lungs. He got no reprieve, no chance to recover, his uncle bringing his foot up to hit him hard on his head as soon as he'd taken a step back.

He was going to die for interrupting them, he realized.

"If I were to pursue that bond with her without absolute certainty, I would be putting her life in danger. I cannot lose Kagome, pup, not like that, not again. It was too much before, but now? It would end me." Inuyasha kicked some snow off of the ground with his words blurring Daichi's vision as he shifted quickly to land a kick to each of his knees, causing Daichi to almost crumple in front of him. Daichi had always known his uncle toyed with him during these spars, hell, his uncle toyed with almost everyone during these kinds of spars, and that knowledge was usually enough to terrify him. What could this man do, if given the reason, to someone? How easy was it for him to kill?

It was more terrifying to be the one on the receiving end of his anger, though Daichi still knew his uncle was holding back.

"I think…" Daichi paused as he evaded his uncle's fists, back flipping over a shrubbery. "I think," he began again as he perched on a bench that was almost completely covered in a snow bank and tried to catch his breath, "that you are lying to yourself. She is your mate, uncle. She loves you, I've never seen her look at someone the way she looks at you, and I've certainly never heard of you acting like you do with her. You cannot overlook the significance that you lived until now, that I happened to meet her just after she and this guy broke up, that she just happened to become my closest friend. You would not have sought her out otherwise. This is fate, and you know it. You're fighting it, you're fighting yourself. How much control did it take, just now, to stop before you marked her?" Daichi was rewarded for his words with a sharp punch to his head followed by a heavy kick to his stomach, a bit of blood spilling out of his mouth onto the snow as he collapsed next to the bench, his uncle flipping him over by his foot like they were on WWE.

"You will not repeat what you just saw, do you understand me?" Yash was leaning over him then, eyes flashing red as he punched the ground beside where Daichi had toppled off of the bench, the quarter demon recoiling from the brute force he used.

"I don't want to, thanks. That was like walking in on my parents, but somehow worse." Daichi rolled his feet to kick Inuyasha square in the stomach but met air again and felt his uncle grab his feet and push him in such a way that the force made his legs keep moving to where they embedded in the snow above his head in an uncomfortable twist.

"Would you like to know the truth, Daichi?" He was on top of the house, Daichi once again marveling at the agility the half demon possessed once he'd fixed himself. Hauling himself off of the ground and into a defensive stance, he said his next words as he prepared for the attack, his breathing labored with the effort it took. His uncle would call it soon, he theorized, would pull an end move to give Daichi a chance to catch his breath before they started up again.

"Yes, I thought I made that very clear." He was right, his uncle had launched from the tile roof easily, tackling Daichi to the ground and quickly getting him into an impenetrable hold, his head locked in the crook of his uncle's arm with such a pressure that he thought it would crack.

"I don't know if she is my mate, but I wish she was" the words were a whisper, Daichi tapping at his uncle's arm in submission before collecting himself to look him in the eyes, expecting the man to continue going, which he did. "I am Kagome's in whole, there is not an ounce of me that does not belong to her, that is not fully vested in her well-being. All of me wants her, in every single way that you can imagine, all of me loves her absolutely. My human and my demon are constantly warring inside me with the proper way to show her that love."

"And you, the half demon?" Daichi knew the struggle, had seen his father, on occasion, battle with himself in a similar way. Daichi's own was much different, but he still could empathize with Inuyasha's pain. His uncle's demon was strong, an absolute testament to how powerful his great grandfather had been. His grandfather, Sesshomaru, was much like the legendary Inu no Taisho, but had inherited so very much from his mother, the nature of his demon included. The family patriarch had once disclosed to Daichi that his brother was everything he remembered his father having been, in looks as well as character and strength. Inuyasha faced a demon half that was more powerful than any other half demon's, and it wasn't something Daichi could wrap his head around.

"I," Inuyasha took a deep breath in a he considered the words carefully. "I love her too much, am much too terrified to explore the depth of that in the event that she isn't my mate, Daichi. I need her like I need air." The words his uncle said gave Daichi courage to share his own thoughts on the matter, sitting up as Inuyasha finally let go of him fully.

"You're in love with her." The words were plain, unbiased, despite Daichi's early distaste for the mere thought.

"Very much so." Inuyasha sighed as he ran a hand through is hair peering back at the door Kagome had disappeared through. "I've only just realized that myself." Daichi hadn't known what to say to that, having expected Yash to deny it, settling for an unspoken invitation to pick back up in their sparring, dropping into an offensive stance.

"Just take her already, and please remember to lock your doors and windows tonight so I don't have to hear it." The comment was supposed to upset Inuyasha, it had been Daichi's plan, but when he found his body propelling through the air towards a tree line, he wondered if it had been such a wise decision.

Inuyasha had taken to the trees for a quick run to clear his mind after he'd finished sparring with Daichi, enjoying the way the wind cooled down his very heated body.

He was only able to push a few more rounds out of his great nephew before the pup had asked to stop, and Inuyasha had made him take an order in for his and Kagome's dinner to Rin. Rin was nothing if not a loving woman, and she had remarked to Inuyasha after brunch that she was worried about Kagome's stress level that day, having been the one to suggest they keep to themselves for the rest of the evening. He'd had a long talk with his brother after they'd seen the bulk of the family off, all centered around the same conversation he had just had with Daichi.

"You will spend your whole life afraid that you will only hurt your woman, Inuyasha, but do not caution yourself against intimacy because of that. It is inevitable with our natures, I have often fought with the same struggles. Tune out the fear and listen to what your heart is telling you, remove Sophie from the equation and hear the narrative of Kagome instead. Trust your demon on this one. She is your mate, she is a member of this family, she will be with you until the end of your life. I am sure of it." It had been the most reassuring piece of advice he'd gotten thus far, but he'd pushed it to the back of his mind as he'd continued through the rest of the day.

He hadn't thought much on Sesshomaru's statement until Kagome had turned to him in his study, words written in her eyes that even he didn't know how to express. How long had it been since she'd looked at him like that, how many years had he waited to feel the full extent of her love? He had never felt as loved as he did when she'd so softly traced his features, her eyes filled with the same unspeakable emotion she'd had when they'd first started addressing the complexities of their situation. It was all consuming, the depth he found in her eyes, stealing the breath from his lungs and the words he'd wanted to say from his throat. He'd been so afraid when he'd caught on to her emotional state, then, worried he'd somehow opened up a wound with his attempt to relive when they had been together before. But instead of having undone all the healing she'd so delicately achieved, he was faced with nothing but adoration and love. How? How did he deserve that, how did he deserve her? It was like Kagome was seeing him for the first time, really seeing him, like he was Inuyasha, not just Yashiro. It'd brought his heart into his throat to realize she'd been keeping that from him for so long, to know she had still been trying to protect herself from pain he could bring her and now she was letting him in. It was the love reflected in her eyes shining back at him that brought Sesshomaru's words to mind, and he did as his brother had suggested in what remained of the moment when Kagome had brought her arms around him. He'd tempered his fear for the moment, took his experience with Sophie out of the equation, and let his inner most thoughts and desires float to the surface. The revelation he'd encountered had led to him grasping her tightly, unable to stop himself from trying to kiss away her tears between his words, suddenly overcome with the emotion.

"I love you so much, Kagome," He'd whispered then, against her ear. I am yours, and I am nothing if I am not yours. You are so perfect, so beautiful, and I don't think I will ever live long enough to tell you that as often as I think you deserve to hear it. I am yours, baby, you take whatever you want from me, whatever you need, because I don't need anything but you."

He was in love with her. He knew, without a shadow of doubt in his mind, when he looked into her dark brown eyes that were brimming with love and appreciation that he could die right then and be the happiest he'd ever been. How, in his right mind, had he avoided it for so long? How could he overlook what he'd wanted, what he'd felt, and just pretend he could live without her love, that he could spend one moment in her presence and not instantly be head over heels for her? Still, he knew he could do nothing about it, really, could not show her, physically, the depth of his love.

He wanted to see her weep with joy as he tenderly brought her to the height of passion, watch each gasp and eyeroll as they connected in the most primal way a man and a woman could, molding for a brief speck of time into one entity instead of two halves. He desperately wanted to so heavily cloud her mind with love made that she could do nothing but cling to him and bask in the vastness of his love for her in the afterglow. He wanted to taste her, wanted to show her pleasure abounding that she had never known, wanted to give her the most intense night of her life, wanted her to want no one but him, to smell of nothing but him.

But he couldn't. Because he didn't know if she was his mate and he would be damned if that meant losing her. Not now, not when his heart was hurting just from being away from her as he was on his run that night.

He hadn't expected anything in response to his declaration in the study because he was almost certain she hadn't even heard him, his words had been so soft, and she'd seemed so distracted. He didn't need to hear her say anything. She loved him, Inuyasha knew that better than he knew his own name, and later, as she'd so enticingly wrapped herself around him and tried to get him to lose his ever-loving mind with just a brush of lips against his neck, he realized that she wanted him beyond rational thought. Kagome had given up fighting this, if her actions were any indication, and Inuyasha had almost given up his composure the moment she'd naughtily run her tongue against his throat. But he hadn't lost it, had still maintained the same clear head, had been able to keep pushing the envelope with her and not feeling even a twinge of his rising demon in him, even as he'd bruised her neck from his kiss. He'd done that-selfishly-to see the remnants of himself on her body, not because his demon had been angling in that moment for him to fully take her and mate her properly.

It had been the tessaiga at his hip, the sword he'd used so long ago to maintain control giving him the same strength then. He'd debated, when he'd dropped it on the porch, if the kotodama on the wall in his study would have the same effect. Or if, just on a hunch, he combined a piece of demon fang with Kagome's barrier abilities if he'd be able to create something that would let him deepen his relationship with her without fear. His father had been phenomenal at barrier making, which is why the tessaiga was everything it had become, a trait he suddenly wished he had inherited. If he could somehow replicate that same effect the tessaiga had in a wearable form, he'd save himself from…himself. He'd test the beads, he decided, later that night, remembering the way he'd been able to control his demon with their aid before. He'd be playing with fire, a dangerous game once he and Kagome were left alone in his wing of the family estate, no twerpy nephews to interrupt them once the sun officially set.

He had run the perimeter of the property a couple of times before he felt ready to head into the warmth of the home, landing quietly on the porch and grabbing his sword before sneaking in to find Kagome sorting out some trays in the little kitchen nook that was really only there for beverages and snacks. Rin must have sent them, the assortment clearly enough to tide them for the entire night even if they were ravenous, Kagome having left the half-sized fridge open for him to see the wide array of drinks she had been loading in there. He knew she was aware of his presence, because frankly she was aware of him now even if he was wearing a glamour, but she kept her back turned to him, humming gently. That was okay, he decided, because he could take in her appearance without having to own up to his greedy inspection of her. Her hair was still damp from her bath, curling a little at the edges as it dried. She'd apparently asked for whoever dropped off the food to help her start the fireplace, the crackling of the logs catching his ears and the heat permeating the small space. She was wearing another nightgown like the one she'd worn last night, without the bathrobe this time and in a deep green instead of navy blue. It didn't have any of the lace trimmings, he noted, either, just the satin, the simplicity somehow more appealing.

"You should go shower," her voice stirred him out of his thoughts, his eyes snapping up from where they'd been admiring the curve of her bottom encased in the satin to find her looking at him. "Or at least wash up. There's actual ice in your hair." He'd ignored her advice, dropping tessagia to lean against the corner as he crossed the space between him and Kagome, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind and burying his nose in neck to be rewarded with a squeal. "Inuyasha! Your nose is freezing!" She attempted to wiggle out of his grasp, the skin on her neck breaking out in goosebumps that validated her complaint.

"It's a good thing that I have a warm woman waiting for me," Inuyasha was teasing her in hopes she'd get riled up, rewarded when Kagome swirled around in his grasp to lightly push at his chest, a scoff on her lips.

"Any one woman would do, then? I have quite a long list of people who would be willing to warm your bed, if you're so inclined." She'd raised an eyebrow at him, still trying to worm her way out of his grasp and taking a few steps back, but he followed her. She pushed the fridge door the rest of the way closed as she tried in vain to escape his advances. She wasn't actually trying to get away from, playing right into whatever game he'd decided to start, which excited him even more than he already was to test out his theory. He had her up against the door, then, a hand pushing against her abdomen and his other forearm coming to rest next to her head, blocking her only exit.

"No," he said softly, pressing a knee between her legs so he could lean closer to her, not missing the way she wrinkled her nose when a piece of his hair- it was icy- brushed against it. "Not any one woman would do. I have a very specific taste." He let his hand leave her stomach for only a moment, brushing the hair over her shoulder to admire his handiwork from the earlier that day, his thumb running over the purplish bruise that was already forming there.

"I have a lot of friends, Yash. I'm sure I can find someone who meets your standards. What are you looking for?" He hadn't grabbed the beads of subjugation when he'd come in, mainly because he'd been distracted by Kagome's presence and he had wanted to shower, but now he was wishing he had, or that he'd at least left his sword on his person.

"You," he said it plainly, dropping his head to place a kiss to his love bite before running a few more against her jaw.

"You have to shower if you want me to warm you up, then. Standard rules of operation." He'd relented, finally, sensing that he couldn't draw their interaction out much more as things were, and excused himself to do what Kagome had asked, making quick work of washing the ice and snow from his hair and person before returning to the living area. She'd already set them up to eat in the living room, her legs splayed out on the tatami mats as she leaned against the table there, eating slowly while she watched the news when he'd returned. It was already dark out, Inuyasha realized, and he moved around her to lock all of the doors and shut all of the opaque screens over the glass doors. It was only when he was sure that no one would bother them that he sat down and ate, clearing the table and setting the trays in the foyer for someone to collect later when they were done, making damn sure to lock the door leading in from the foyer as he did so.

Kagome had no idea what was going on in his head, he realized, as she lazily reclined in front of the fire. She didn't even look over her shoulder to see where he was going when he'd grabbed the tessaiga and dropped it next to his bed as a backup plan before quickly removing the kotodama from the box they'd been in for the last several decades, still in pristine condition despite their age. He debated where the best place to put them would be, finally deciding just to wrap them around his ankle so Kagome wouldn't be too spooked by him dropping them over his neck (if her earlier reaction to his fire rat was anything to heed) and because he wanted to have the full use of both of his hands. He'd carefully arranged himself behind her on the tatami mat, content for now to just bask in the warmth of the fire with her as some sitcom rerun played on the TV, his hand running lazily up and down her arm for the first episode, his arm wrapping around her middle and pulling her against him for the rest. Inuyasha easily could have stayed that way the entire night, and part of him wanted to. But the rest wanted him to do something about the throbbing ache he had been left with after their encounter earlier that.

"About last night," he'd begun after muting the TV, breaking the silence that had settled in between them and meeting a groan from Kagome that he chose to ignore. "What I said, about wanting more, why did you say I should take it up with myself in the morning?"

"Because you're the one setting the limit here, Yash. I was the one saying I don't want to fall in love and get married, but you were the one saying you don't want anything more than friendship between us. Your rules are a little harsher than mine. Which, by the way, would it kill you to stop sending such mixed signals? You're the one who initiates all of our rule breaking contact." She rolled onto her back with the words, looking up at him as she explained herself. She was right, he was, even today he could have easily ignored how her scent had shifted instead of planting himself so predatorily over her. In fact, if he didn't want to kiss her, he wouldn't have. She was easy to over power, especially for him. But the rule hadn't been created for her, it had been for him. Luckily, he might have found a loophole.

"You spoke in past tense, Kagome. Are you saying you want more now?" He needed to hear her say it, needed the validation that he wasn't imagining the way she'd stopped fighting something earlier that day, wanted to hear her voice saying she wanted him.

"If that means that we stop this, then no. I don't want to lose you."

"That's not an option, Kagome. I'm asking what you want from me." Inuyasha watched as Kagome hesitated for only a moment before sighing heavily and meeting his eyes with no fear.

"You."

"Good."

He'd descended on her then, capturing her mouth in searing contact that left his head spinning, shocked that Kagome was already responding so feverishly to his attentions. It was almost as if she had anticipated his motive, and maybe she had, her legs wrapping around him as he knelt over her momentarily serving as a reminder that she wanted this just as badly as he wanted her. It was hot and heavy from the start, Kagome greedily deepening their kiss in just a few moments, her teeth capturing his bottom lip at the end of one particularly good one that left his ears being overcome with a rush of noise that blocked out everything but the sounds that Kagome was making from his touch. Everything was swimming, Inuyasha so easily lost in the feel of Kagome's mouth on his own that he hadn't even realized that he'd lifted her off of the floor and gathered her into his lap until she'd rolled her hips against his, the contact pulling a primal sort of growl out of him and reminding him that he needed to be near tessaiga before he tried anything with her.

"Do you trust me, Kagome?" He pulled back from her long enough to ask her, his hands unconsciously pushing up the edge of her nightgown so that they could rest on the bare skin of her hips, waiting to hear an answer before he moved again.

"Completely," she murmured as she placed a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth. It was the only permission he needed, his hands grasping the edge of her nightgown and pulling it over her head, throwing it somewhere in the room that was away from the fire before lapping his way down Kagome's neck to the valley of her breasts, his ministrations slowing as he realized he was still in complete control and he only had one shot at doing this right the first time. He was still torn as to what he wanted the end of this night to look like, part of him dying to be connected with her in such a way that left no her no question about his feelings for her, that left his scent on every inch and in each crevice of her bdoy. But, more importantly, he wanted to show her what she meant to him, to worship at the altar of her body in a way no man had before, to have her screaming his name in broken syllables as he tasted her on his tongue and lips.

"I want to make love to you, Kagome," he whispered the words as he encapsulated the peak of one breast in his mouth, swirling his tongue around it and getting rewarded with a harsh exhale from his ministrations before he let go. "But, this isn't the right place, not for that, not yet. You deserve more than this." He repeated the same motion he'd just done on the other breast, pleased when Kagome rolled herself against his barely clothed groin from the sensation. "There are, however, other things I can do for you, other ways…" He trailed off in what he hoped was an obvious askance of permission, his eyes trailing up her torso to meet her gaze, having been transfixed by her body.

"Only if you let me reciprocate." Her words were all he needed to scoop her up off the floor, recapturing her mouth with his own in a slow and sensual rhythm as he made the familiar trek to the same place his bed had been for the better part of the last 200 years. His eyes easily adjusted to the dimly lit room, a small oil lamp being the only source of light there. He slid the bedroom door shut with one hand distractedly once they made it through the threshold, the other hand having wrapped around Kagome's bottom to support her, his fingers tightly squeezing her ass as he did so in a way that only made him feel more slap of the bedroom door against the frame was harsh, typically accompanied with total silence in the little wing. It was a sound he'd acquainted with going to bed, having always been rather careless with the force he exerted when he finally collapsed in the room. But not tonight. What followed the slamming of that door was not silence, and it most definitely wasn't sleep.

But it was more than what Inuyasha could have hoped for.

A/N:

Hi all, this is a super long chapter but I needed to get it out. Special thanks to itmarina for letting me bounce this off of her a million and one times, haha.

Next update will be in two weeks, I have a wedding to go to next week as well as a first communion and they're both out of state. I plan to, selfishly, use the time to love on my own husband who is ever patient as I spend all of my time not working writing this.

Thanks for all of your support and reviews and follows and favorites, I greatly appreciate each of you and I hope this one is well received.

Until next time

K. Marjorie