Chapter 15: Inuyasha

"I need you with me, Kagome. Haven't you realized that yet?"

"I was afraid. I thought I was going to lose you. I was terrified."

"Kagome…before I met you, I never trusted a living soul. But you've cried for my sake. You've
always stayed by my side. When I'm with you, I feel so peaceful and happy."

"Kagome was born to meet me! And I was born for her."

Inuyasha

Inuyasha was so nervous walking into that meeting, his left-hand clenching uncomfortably tight at his side as his right hand held onto a stack of folders. His phone was buzzing the familiar three quick beats followed by two slow beats that signified Kagome was calling him, and a glance at the clock on the wall reminded him that she was probably already in Tokyo by now. It took all his resolve to not pull his phone out of his pocket and answer it, but he was doing his best to push through the next hour. This would be his third meeting of the day, all centered around the same topic: Berlin.

Sesshomaru had reviewed the same productivity reports Inuyasha had been painstakingly reviewing daily for the last few weeks and reached the same conclusion he himself had just arrived at that morning: he would have to go to Berlin. There was a "but," however, and a big one at that. Inuyasha himself knew better than anyone how precarious the status of the branch was without a CEO who had been with the company for a long time. It was why he had taken so long to promote someone who had been with the company since the beginning, why he'd chosen him very carefully. For all intents and purposes, the branch should have been resolutely stable when he left just a month ago, but now his brother was giving him an ultimatum. He could go for an indeterminate amount of time and train someone else to take the place of the CEO who just left, or he could transition himself back into the role of CEO and split his time between Berlin and Kyoto as he pleased. The first option was certainly his main focus; Inuyasha wanted to live in Japan if he could. There was a third option, of course, which involved him relocating completely, but that was out of the question. He would not be leaving Kagome, not now, not when he was finally able to enjoy being in her life fully.

But in his meeting with Tensho, Tenzin, Shippo and Sesshomaru, the second option started to sound much more stable for the company. Inuyasha's continued presence, though intermittent, would provide more stability for the branch in that he was the most trusted person for many of their partners; he would have more success as CEO than anyone else he trained to replace him. Even if he was splitting his time, the outcomes in the models looked far better than those that predicted the growth under new leadership. The luxury of running a company with your family was not lost on Inuyasha, especially as Shippo and Tensho fervently poured over all possible scenarios in an attempt to find a way to support his desires to stay in Kyoto for the long term. But even they were unsuccessful, Shippo sighing heavily as he handed his father figure the report they'd generated.

He had to do it, he had to go to Berlin. He had to leave Kagome.

It's why he was here, now, situated at the head of the familiar board room table, a large screen across from him displaying the interim CEO at Berlin as his family from the previous meeting filled in the seats at the table around him, Daichi a late addition to the party after he'd gotten lunch with his mother. He was shadowing Sesshomaru, and while Inuyasha was initially against the pup knowing about this before Kagome, he realized it was just par for the course. There was no way they could have the opportunity to properly season the kid for working in the company if he wasn't included in these conversations at the beginning. It offered another useful purpose as well, he surmised, having just begun to think through what he needed to do before he left to get his life in order. Daichi would be getting what was once Inuyasha's apartment, now, and he could have that squared away before he left the office today with his great nephew already present to sign the lease agreement he'd printed. He had no use for it anymore, not when he'd be out of the country half the time and trying to make up for lost time with Kagome for the rest. He needed Daichi to keep a close friendship with Kagome in his absence, to keep her safe without making her feel like she was being babysat, as well. It wasn't ideal, Inuyasha wishing he could reasonably offer for Kagome to stay with Shippo or Sesshomaru in his absence, but she wasn't a child. A voice in the back of his mind suggested asking her to accompany him, but he pushed it back as he focused on the large television across from him.

The familiar face on the screen was already warmly greeting him, Johann expressing his extreme excitement on seeing the other man again before Sesshomaru cut in and began the process of outlining the status of the branch. Inuyasha only pretended to listen intently, his mind whirring with image after image of Kagome instead of the facts he needed to be considering. In place of the now stable figures he had printed on the copy paper in front of him, of the positively climbing numbers that reassured him he would be successful in operating the branch from a distance while maintaining his position in the Kyoto branch as well, he saw her. Pressed against her door that morning, wrapped in one of his button-down shirts on another occasion, the curve of her spine as she leaned over the kitchen counter to reach a bottle of water, the way her hair would blow into her face as they waited for the crosswalk to be safe to traverse, the smile she blinded him with every time he entered her apartment at the end of a day.

There was no going back, was there, no way of returning to friendship from the waters they were sailing now? For the first time, Inuyasha considered the possibility of really spending the rest of his life with Kagome, because it was either that or have her gone from his life completely.

Saying he settled for Sophie would be a lie. He had loved her, she had loved him, but it hadn't been like this when he contemplated a life with her. It wasn't this heavy, thick, never ending blanket of comfort and excitement all wrapped in one, this unending need for a woman he had no claim to. Even as he waited for his demon to tell him what he wanted to hear, every part of him was warring with the right thing to do. What if the right thing to do was throw caution to the wind and just act on instinct? Marrying Sophie had been nerve-wracking in that there was an air of change around the idea of them moving from a courting couple to husband and wife, Sophie having prattled on each night that he'd climbed into her bedroom window for a conjugal visit over her new responsibilities to him, and his new responsibilities to her. But marrying Kagome, as Inuyasha considered it, would change nothing between them, their relationship already dripping in the domestics that marriage so often brought on. If they were any two other people, if he were not a demon and if they had the reassurance he would not kill her on accident by his overzealous side trying to bond with her before he was certain, he would have already made that move, wouldn't he?

But now, as Tensho started debating with Johann how much time Inuyasha would actually need to spend in Germany each year, he wondered if she felt the same way, truly. Would it be wrong of him to test her, just a bit, to see how she felt, to see if she carried the same reckless abandon he had for ensuring their future together? A plan began to formulate before he even knew what he was thinking, highly detailed and probably asinine. If he gave his apartment to Daichi, like he already planned, Kagome would immediately suggest he keep his things at her place, which would really be only a few more clothing items that hadn't already cozied into her closet. Then, he could reasonably argue his contribution to her bills, something they'd debated a few times already. Kagome was against it, even if he hadn't set foot in his own apartment in almost a month save for a quick run to grab clothes for work. But now, if he had no place, if everything he wanted from his old place (which was nothing, not even the furniture, honestly, all of his keepsakes were at Sesshomaru's), he could convince his woman that her apartment was also his.

But if he could argue that, if he could edge his way into taking over her bills, if he could convince her that she had no reason to take that job with Kyo… If Inuyasha eliminated her need for an income, if he proposed she actually apply for that online grad school she'd been eyeing, if he freed her up, would she agree to traveling with him to Berlin? That same suggestion he had earlier popped back up in his mind, a request from a part of himself to beg her to go with him. Would Kagome even want that? Should he even do any of it, or should he merely suggest it to her instead of manipulating the situation? Should he lay his emotions out for her to see, should he let it all out and put the decision in her hands?

He didn't know what to do.

"Uncle." It was Tensho, his eyes thinly veiled with scorn as he realized the man wasn't paying attention. "Is alternating every two months okay with you?"

"What other options do I have?" It was meant to seem rhetorical, but Inuyasha still needed the information regardless. He hadn't been paying attention, and the way Tensho's eyes narrowed suggested his nephew was very aware of his wandering mind.

"Whatever you do," Tenzin cut in then, always the peacemaker of the hotheaded males, "it will be split even, two months here followed by two months there, there months here, three months there. However, I don't recommend exceeding three months. There's a projected drop on the models. Two and two would be the most successful for you, giving you the most freedom in the meantime. You can always stay in Berlin longer, if you choose."

Inuyasha leaned back in his chair as he considered his options. He was going either way, and while he could leave in a few days and have his home in order, his personal life was another matter. He needed to go see Kagome, but there were a few things he would need to put in place before he left. If he went with the intention of just picking up as the CEO, not with the intention of finding someone else to replace him, did it buy him some time? Probably, he theorized. He could take his time in Kyoto, get everything completely squared away before heading to Tokyo for a week and then leaving from there for only a month, to start. He couldn't stomach anything longer until he was more certain of his standing with Kagome.

"How long," he began, his eyes trained on Johann's image as he spoke in German, "before I need to be there?"

"A few weeks, at least. It's not urgent if this is the option you choose." Johann shrugged with his statement. "We're stable, and we'll be able to book you for meetings preemptively to pacify customers. If you're only focused on operations, not on training someone, your time here will be much more productive."

"Tentatively, I'll plan to be there no later than two weeks. I'll decide a schedule over the next week and submit it to everyone here." Inuyasha looked around, making eye contact with everyone at the table, lingering on Daichi with an unspoken warning in his eyes as he began his next statement. "All of you exercising discretion on this matter is appreciated until I can get my personal affairs in order." Daichi looked so serious, his face set in a determined and grim line as he nodded. Inuyasha knew he'd be heading to Tokyo for the New Year, and he knew he was asking a lot of the young demon, but Kagome needed to hear it from him, not anyone else.

Kagome was his business, now, not Daichi's.

Inuyasha felt the lace slip through his fingers as he inspected the gown, stunned at what he stumbled on.

He was supposed to be packing but had realized halfway through washing all of his clothing that it would be easier to just take a few things and buy more once he got to Berlin, which made him turn his focus on getting the apartment completely cleaned and put together before leaving. It was that thought process that lead to him finally giving into Kagome's suggestion to change out all of his hangers to the same ones she used, his little lover having not so subtly dropped several new packs of hangers on the stool outside of the closet the last time he'd been doing hanging his things back up. He'd dropped all of his clothes on the bed after he'd made it, carefully going through and exchanging all of the hangers from his apartment for the ones she wanted him to use, taking them load by load into the closet and hanging them on what Kagome had assigned to be his space.

The shrill ringing of his phone from the bed called for his attention, and he had angled around rather quickly to get back to the king-sized mattress before the call went to voicemail. It was the telltale sound of a box tumbling down from one of Kagome's shelves from where his shoulder caught it that lead him here, having endured the sharp jab of a corner as it scraped down his back, the heavy thud as the hefty box finally reached the ground making him cringe as he debated what he could have broken in his inattention. But when he turned around, forgetting about his phone for the moment, he was shocked at what laid in the box, the lid having fallen off from the jolt as it hit the carpeted floor of the closet.

It was a wedding dress, still white and pristine, delicately folded amongst tissue paper with what he suspected was a ring box tucked in one corner.

Against his better judgement, Inuyasha had pulled the lid off the rest of the way, giving into his curiosity as he knelt next to it. With the removal of the rather flimsy piece of cardboard, Inuyasha was exposed to the full expanse of the box's contents, surprised to find a few other items tucked in down in the two lower corners. His hands had acted on their own, pulling the top of the gown out of its container as he inspected the garment in full, trying to picture it on a person rather than a lifeless piece of fabric folded and proverbially forgotten in a container, but coming up short. It still smelt like a store, he realized, not like it had been in storage for who knows how long, not like it had once been worn by an excited and blushing bride. It wasn't a wedding dress, not anymore, it was a shadow of what Kagome's life would be like, right now, if things had been only a little different. The lace was smooth under his hand, fine, delicate in nature, carefully stitched onto a mesh material that made up the shoulders and back of the dress. It was pure white, exquisite and wholly within what Inuyasha had come to expect of Kagome's taste, somehow youthful yet mature, classic and tasteful.

She would have been a beautiful bride, the way her dark hair would have contrasted with the stark white of the gown, how the bare back of the dress would have highlighted the delightful slope of her spine. Her skin would have been stunning under the lace and mesh, and Inuyasha suddenly could picture her looking over shoulder playfully, the buttons of the dress up her spine like a road map for his fingers, her hair pulled up to show off the graceful arch of her neck. The image was too painful, and he found himself swallowing a big pill of truth that Kagome would have been married, would have been another man's wife, would have carried someone else's child. He had been wrong, so long ago. He could not stomach Kagome with another, could not fathom the idea of her with anyone else in the way he was slowly thinking of her being with him more and more. His emotions were a rotten mess, even days after he knew he'd be leaving, and this wasn't helping. Inuyasha had absolutely no idea what to do. He was afraid of disrupting the delicate peace he and Kagome had established, was worried, terrified, that leaving would set them on a course he didn't want to follow.

He carefully tucked the dress back into the box, pushing away the discomfort in his stomach as he crossed the long sleeves over the bodice as he had found them. Finally looking away from the dress and trying to not imagine how Kagome would have looked in it, Inuyasha reached for the box he had perceived to be for rings. With a quick pop open, he found he was correct, however he still found himself stunned with not just what was once Kagome's engagement ring and wedding band but also what was clearly meant to be a man's wedding band. The urge that settled into his stomach, the sudden gumption to pull the band on his finger startled him, but his fingers were already twitching in anticipation of sliding the cold metal against his skin.

"I really shouldn't be doing this," he murmured to himself, pulling out the plain white wedding band that would have been another man's and slipping on his finger despite his words, the ring just a little too tight on his finger. It felt cold, foreign, even as it was the same type he had worn over a century ago, but he found himself leaving it on as he removed the diamond ring from the same box and inspected it fully. It was stunning, clearly worth a fair amount of money, a large round diamond surrounded by a circle of smaller diamonds, all set in the same white gold of the band on his finger. The wedding ring Kagome would have worn was a thinner version of what the other band was, settling in under the halo of diamonds on her engagement ring even as they sat in the case.

It was then, as he set aside the rings, that he turned his attention to the wooden box in the corner of the larger cardboard box, having forgone any amount of decency he possessed and giving into his base desire to be nosy. It was without a second thought that he pulled that box out, feeling like a ravager amongst the pain of Kagome's most treasured mementos of a time that never was. It was a completely wooden little box, the sides joined in a dove tail pattern and the top a little tricky to pull off, which he finally did after a few seconds of carefully wiggling the lid back and forth, the force he used to hurriedly separate the two halves in impatience spilling the contents all over the larger box and the floor around him.

They were a collection of four inch by four inch photos, image after image of the little minx that had stolen his heart, intimate positions he had only recently been given the permission to see her in. Draped in a thin white sheet, watching the rain fall on a window, the shadow of the drops falling on her bare back, her silhouette in a doorway, her body encased in a fine lingerie as she stared dead at the camera, the image of her cooking breakfast dressed in nothing but a man's shirt with her hair thrown in a messy braid. How many times had he walked into the kitchen in the morning to find she had stolen whatever shirt was on the top of his clean clothes pile, how many times had she appeared at the top of the stairs to her loft in nothing but a satin nightgown as he tried to finish something for work? He had thought…Inuyasha had known that Kagome had been with Hiro, had understood what that might have looked like, but seeing evidence that she had once been with someone the way she was with him tore at his gut. There was something special, to him, in their interactions, a newness he didn't realize he could still experience in the way she cared for him, in the way she made him feel. He searched the pile of photos, anxious to find any evidence that he had something Hiro did not, but he was faced with a distaste in his mouth as soon as he realized that Hiro was the one who had something Inuyasha hadn't.

Hiro had almost had everything Inuyasha wanted, and Inuyasha was just over a week away from potentially putting the brakes on what little he held claim to.

Abruptly, he packed all of the photos back into the box, sharply closing the wooden contraption before removing the ring from his hand and putting it back where it had belonged, snapped the velvet case closed before hurriedly returning the lid of the large box back into place. Automatically, he pushed the white box back into the now empty slot on the shelf, turning tail and realizing he needed to get his shit together fast. Bracing himself against the frame of the closet as he was moving out of the large walk in, he took a deep breath in and considered why he was suddenly so much more off center, a quick perusal of the room revealing all that was left to do was place his two small piles of clothes into the duffel on Kagome's bed.

He wasn't jealous. He was far too old to be jealous, especially of someone who was clearly a fool. No, Inuyasha wasn't comparing himself to someone he had never even seen and finding himself coming up short. He was simply realizing how little he had of someone who claimed everything of him, how very possible it was that she might not be as enraptured as he was. Kagome had said she hadn't loved Hiro the proper way, hadn't fought hard enough to keep him at her side, had merely tucked away their relationship and kept on working towards her own future. But what had Kagome said to him? She didn't want to fall in love, she didn't want to get married. There, in her closet, sat the physical reminders of the emotional scar Kagome bore that he had no way of carrying with her, no way of remedying, real evidence that for a little while, a man held more of her than anyone else ever had.

More than anyone else ever would, if she was so determined.

Okay, maybe he was a little jealous. He hadn't realized until very recently that he was in love with Kagome and being confronted with her wedding dress, of all things, took his mind places he didn't want it to go. Not now, not when he was trying to figure out how to make whatever they had work with his new obligations to his business. This was the time when he should be taking her out, showing her a nice night on the town, treating her to the finer things, slowly tearing down her walls and making her fall just as much in love with him as he was with her. They were supposed to court, to date, to take their time and savor the tension before things reached the true point of no return, when he finally lost every shred of his control. He did not need to be thinking about what kind of white dress Kagome would have chosen if it were him, what kind of ring he would have bought her, how his surname would sound in place of hers.

He was so fucked, especially as his mind echoed Kagome Takeshi over and over.

He was supposed to be leaving for Tokyo today, he had already booked a train ticket, determined to spend the next week with Kagome now that he had a proper timeline on when he was leaving for Germany. But how was he supposed to do that when all he wanted to do, the only thing he could think to do, was to write down each of the swimming thoughts in his head to tell her, to give her the option of closing the door on them, to put their future in her hands? Inuyasha wanted to finally let go of the last shred of his control, to show her, really show her, what he wanted from her. But he needed to be patient, he needed to go to Tokyo with an open mind and explain his current dilemma to Kagome, to give her the option of going with him to Berlin for the first month, if she wanted, to stay longer if she wanted. To stay here, if she wanted.

With his resolve restored, Inuyasha pushed off the door frame and made quick work of packing his clothes and travel toiletry case into his duffel, taking care to turn off and unplug everything in Kagome's apartment. After grabbing his laptop bag from the loft, he took just one more moment to ensure the chimney flute was closed before heading out, the trip to the train station taking just several minutes to walk. He was seated and already chewing through his thoughts once again before he knew it, succumbing to the way the back of his mind was murmuring her name for the first time in centuries, the way his human voice, suddenly stronger than he imagined it could be, was overpowering the voice of his demon. Tell . No pauses, no breaks, no other words, but his mind, the half demon, was already agreeing with his other side, not the human. It was his demon that whispered directions he would follow, that brought forth ideas that he could stomach. Inuyasha would only make things worse, now, if he allowed his mouth to speak words he was certain Kagome would never want to hear from him. He loved her, he was in love with her, knew in that moment that if she wanted it with him, he would give her his entire life. He needed to take his time, needed to be slow and careful with his heart and hers, needed to give them the best chance to really choose each other this time.

He wouldn't tell her, not yet, that he was in love with her. Just like he wouldn't tell her that for the first time since he knew about her relationship with Hiro, he googled the man's name and anxiously scrolled through each photo in his online library as he rode the train to Tokyo. He had an answer, now, after all, if the relentless babbling of his humanity was any indication, the way he swore over and over again to himself that no other man would ever have the pleasure of touching her soft skin again, paired with a reminder of what tonight was, a promise of what his human side would take care of if he let himself. A brief vacation in the relentless days of his ever-weakening control and ever strengthening temptation, a dalliance his demon was suddenly encouraging.

A new moon.

Being at the shrine brought back a fair amount of memories, echoes of voices and scents suddenly twisting through his mind. He'd mounted the numerous steps for the first time in decades, eyes immediately casting to the tree that had once stood at the center of what was his forest. Ironic, wasn't it, that the place that had once been named for him, the place he had been held captive by a sealing arrow, stood just meters from where Kagome had grown up? She was always under his protection, her entire life, every moment. It was only fitting that this shrine was built in what had been his forest, that Miroku and Sango had started what would become the Higurashi family's line. He'd read a theory, once, that soulmates were particles of dust that were near each other when the world was created, and Inuyasha didn't know if that was true, if maybe how long he'd lived on this land lent some strength to their bond. He did know that his soul and Kagome's were made of the same fabric, that they had known each other long before they had skin to dwell in.

He had loved her soul twice, hadn't he? And now he was graced with a third try to get it right. He had, once, sought out the reincarnations of their dear friends, only to meet them and realize once more what Kagome had taught him from the start. A reincarnation is not the person reborn but the soul; they did not have the memories, did not have the same life, did not have the same experiences. They carried the souls of his friends, they found each other in every life time, but they were not them, and even if he was to meet them today they would not be substitutes for the sister and brother Kagome had lost. In the same, Kagome had never been Kikyo, and Inuyasha had never sought out other incarnations of his soulmate, even as he suffered. It wouldn't be fair, to her memory, to do so, but as he looked at the tree that he'd rested against for so long, he thought about what other lives her soul led in his absence.

The sudden sliding open of a door caught Inuyasha's attention, and he was surprised to be met with a teary-eyed Kagome, the scent of despair heavy around her even as she appeared to be stable.

"Well, hello beautiful," he dropped his bags, plopping the flowers he'd picked up for her mother in thanks for dinner last week on top of them, "come here."

Kagome didn't need to be told twice, making quick work of closing the distance between them and walking right into his open arms, a little squeal of surprise escaping her as his arms crossed underneath her bottom and not over her back like she'd expected. He picked her up effortlessly, quickly turning them about in a circle, savoring the way Kagome's face lit up for a moment, how her hands had first clenched his shoulders in surprise before running up his neck to cup his face in an obvious request for a kiss. He stopped moving, then, carefully letting her body slide down his enough that their lips could touch, still suspending Kagome's body off the ground as he finally found purchase from the ache in his chest. Even when she was distraught, catching a waft of her fresh scent was like coming home, and while it had only been a few days, Inuyasha felt like he hadn't seen her in a month. It was why, when she was close enough, that he took control of their kiss, using one hand to support her weight as the other wove into her hair and pinned her to him, angling her just so to deliver the most delicate kiss he could muster in that moment.

"I'm going to vomit." Inuyasha only pulled away to shoot Daichi a dirty look for ruining his moment, but Kagome craned her head around to settle Daichi with a devious smirk.

"What? Not enough bushes around here for you?"

"Okay," Inuyasha cut in, dropping Kagome carefully to the ground, "Kagome," said girl looked back at him at the sound of her name, "where's your mom?" He picked up the flowers and waved them as his excuse to go find the older woman, but he had more motive than just dropping off the flowers.

"She's in the house," Kagome shrugged and pointed in the general direction of where Inuyasha knew the homestead was. "It's just her right now, Aunt Hana's working while the kids are at the festival. Now's a good time. Find me after?" He kissed her cheek softly before walking away, overhearing Kagome suggest she and Daichi go find Souta before her brother left for the festival.

Inuyasha hadn't had time to talk to the older woman alone before, and now there were burning questions on his mind that she might be able to work through with him, to give him some idea of where he should go from here. It was a quick walk to the caretaker's home, still the same Inuyasha remembered it being from centuries ago, and he dropped his bags in the foyer before carefully taking off his shoes. He could hear someone in the kitchen, and he recognized the scent of Kagome's mother from where it appeared she was making tea, so he made sure to make some sort of sound as he was heading that way. He didn't want to scare her, and sure enough when he appeared in the doorway of the kitchen, Mama Higuarshi was already looking up in his direction, a smile crossing her features.

"Inuyasha, hello dear! I didn't know you were coming today." She was on her feet already, crossing kitchen to plant a motherly kiss on his cheek and pulling him down to give her a proper hug. "What lovely flowers."

"They're for you," he extended them to her once she pulled back, the older woman taking them before inhaling the scent of fresh lilies, "a thank you for dinner last week."

"Oh, that's not necessary! I don't mind at all. Why don't you sit? I'm making some tea." Inuyasha nodded with a smile as he sat down, watching the woman putter around the kitchen to put the flowers in some water before gathering everything they needed for tea and settling it on the table before him. "Is there something on your mind, dear?"

"That obvious?" Inuyasha went about pouring himself some hot tea, carefully blowing on the cup before taking a sip.

"You just look troubled, is all." Mama Higurashi was following the same pattern of actions he was, contentedly sipping on tea as she relaxed before him. "What's bothering you?"

"Several things, I suppose." Inuyasha looked down into the rippling tea of his cup, trying to decide where to start. "I have to go back to Berlin, and I haven't told Kagome yet."

"I'm sure she'll take it just fine, she's rather resilient. You were there for so long before, after all." He looked up for only a moment trying to read the woman before him but coming up short.

"That was before," he murmured. "Things are different now. I barely knew her, and now I'm…" Inuyasha sighed before running a hand through his hair. "I don't want you to think ill of me, or of Kagome when I expl-"

"Inuyasha." The way her voice was warm surprised him and he looked up from where he was staring at the grain of the wood table to meet her gaze once more. "I let my eldest child fight monsters beside you when she just 15 years old. Do you think I would suddenly distrust you after all the care you've taken with her before? I was young, once. I know what it's like."

"It's not…" Inuyasha sighed, trying to find the right words. "I was married, years ago, and because of my nature my wife ended up dying by my hand. I was supposed to be binding my life to hers, giving her the chance to live with me forever. It's hard to explain, but I haven't pursued that kind of relationship fully with your daughter because I'm not capable of losing her that way, not like that. I worry about being careless and harming her."

"Once, years ago, I asked Kagome if she was afraid of you, of what you could become, and do you know what she told me?" Inuyasha merely shook his head no, eyes meeting his companions head on. "She told me that you were incapable of hurting her, that she was not afraid of you in the least because even without any control you still protected her. Has that changed, have you changed so much that you suddenly fear that you could not protect her, even from yourself?"

"No," he stated, "even now, I would sooner die."

"Trust yourself, Inuyasha. However, I fail to see what this has to do with you going to Berlin." Mama Higuarshi punctuated the statement with a sip of tea.

"We're in a place, now, where things could either progress exponentially or end completely. I am worried me having to leave will bring about the end of things for us, and selfishly I want to ask Kagome to drop everything and come with me."

"You don't want to things to end, then?" She was testing him, Inuyasha realized that, but he still had to swallow the anger at her suggestion that he wouldn't want a life with Kagome. He knew it was a mother's instinct to protect their children, and Mama Higuarshi was doing her best to do so right then.

"Who would want things to end? I have spent centuries wondering if I made her up, if she really wasn't this wonderful thing, but I didn't. She's real, and she's right here, and I don't want to leave her." He'd still been steadily drinking his tea, but Inuyasha made a point to maintain eye contact with the woman across from him as he spoke his peace.

"Then what do you want of my daughter?" She was so much like Kagome, he realized, or perhaps Kagome was like her. She was strong, was unbiased in their conversation though Inuyasha knew she probably had an idea of what she wanted for them, good or bad. Kagome was much the same, always listening impartially as he explained past experiences or memories that would normally hurt someone to hear. He wasn't a fool, he knew she'd endured suffering over his love for others centuries before, but now she was trying to see what was good for him in it.

"It's too early, for her, I know that. But I am in love with her, and I would want nothing more than to spend the rest of my days with her." Inuyasha paused to take a sip of tea as he debated how to explain himself again. "I cannot stomach leaving her because I do not want to lose her, but I cannot afford to take the financial hit of losing my branch of the company if I choose not to go at all. Especially if I want a life with Kagome. I wouldn't feel comfortable potentially having a wife if I didn't have the means I am used to." Inuyasha didn't miss the way Mama's eyes widened at the word "wife," nor did he miss the way his heart skipped a beat at the notion of Kagome being such a mate for him.

"So, what will you do?" She appeared calm, but one of her eyebrows were raised as she considered him, taking a sip of tea.

"Tell her what's going on with Berlin, explain to her how my options are to either stay there indefinitely trying to find a replacement for myself, or split my time between here and there permanently. I want her to come with me, I'd love nothing more, but I know she won't, not when she's got the job with Kyo lined up."

"And you won't try to persuade her with your feelings?"

"No. This Hiro character…that experience has her convinced that she doesn't want to fall in love or get married. I can't approach her with feelings and desires that she doesn't want, it would only push her away."

"Good. You're doing just fine, sweetheart, at least by me. Just be patient and trust yourself. Kagome is young, you two have plenty of time to grow together. I'm sure you will find a middle ground. And if not, I always say, 'what's meant to be will be.' If you two are fated, you'll find your way."

"Thank you, for listening." Inuyasha pushed his now empty cup away. "I want to take Kagome to dinner tonight, and I was hopeful you would not object to her staying with me for the next few days if she chooses."

"Oh hush," Mama Higuarshi picked up their cups and made her way to the sink, speaking over her shoulder as she worked. "You two would do it anyway, though I appreciate you being upfront with me. Go on, then, and get on your way."

Inuyasha nodded before standing, readjusting his jacket more comfortably as he prepared to go find his sweetheart. He had turned to head out the door, a thank you on his lips before Mama Higuarshi's voice stopped him.

"Inuyasha, for what it's worth," he turned to see her gaze focused on him completely, "Kagome will always love you differently than she will love anyone else. You will always be her exception." He stilled, considering what Mama Higurashi was trying to tell him. It must have been on his face, the confusion as his brain processed all the possibilities the statement could mean, because she smiled softly before clarifying. "If anyone were to be capable of softening her heart to want those things that you want, it would be you. Just be patient with her, and don't rush." Inuyasha was only able to nod before he departed from the home, thoughts still swimming but with less force.

Was he really Kagome's exception?

Kagome was a goddess, all the time, but tonight especially.

He didn't know if it was his new-found intention with her, or if it was the time they'd spent apart, despite the brevity of it. Either way, he couldn't stop looking at her across from him at the table in the little Italian restaurant he'd gotten a last-minute reservation at. It was a nice place, pricey, which is why he was grateful they had a chef's table option. They'd simply eat whatever meal the chef deigned appropriate for the evening, and Kagome wouldn't have to see the price of her meal, an amount he was sure he would be berated for spending on her when she'd probably be just as contented to sit in a cheap hotel room and eat canned ravioli. He knew he didn't need to do these things for her, he just wanted to. What was more rewarding, as a man, to escort such a beautiful woman into a room and watch as eyes discretely turned to appreciate her, just to have her tuck into his side and kiss his cheek unaware of it all?

Besides, when did she ever hang out and eat cheap food in a dress like the one she was wearing? It was navy, and he wondered if he had babbled about liking that color on her before because she looked all too smug when he'd tried to compliment her earlier, a crushed velvet number that hugged the curves of her body. It was off shoulder with long, tight sleeves that provided the warmth that he deemed essential, though it ended just at her knees in a tight skirt that left her calves bare save for the translucent tights she'd chosen. They were dotted with glitter, which was surprisingly enchanting, and her feet were incased in pair of shiny nude pumps with a pointy heel that could probably kill someone if used properly. Inuyasha had, admittedly, taken her shopping before dinner, but he hadn't looked at what she'd chosen, merely handing over a credit card to the shop attendant and asking discretely that Kagome not get to see price tags, using the time it took for Kagome to make a decision to grab himself the charcoal grey suit he was currently wearing. He typically found it hard to get a suit jacket that didn't gap at the waist or didn't pull too taught across his shoulders, and he'd ended up having to get the waist taken in on the one he'd bought, luckily discovering the store offered a tailoring service.

The only reason Kagome had gone along with it was because he said it would part of a belated Christmas present to her, though if he were being honest he had much more to give her than a night out. It was why, when she was trying on shoes with the attendant, he had snuck into a jeweler to get her the pearl drop earrings and matching necklace she was wearing now, and it as also why he'd arranged for her to have an appointment at the salon of the hotel he had gotten a room in. He knew he was pushing it, but he was so glad he took the time to pamper her some, she was simply glowing, her hair carefully curled and pulled away from her face in the most complimentary of ways. Inuyasha would never forget how her eyes had widened at the sight of the pearls, a set that had reminded him of his mother when he'd caught sight of them in the window. "For your graduation, since I've seemed to have forgotten to gift you anything all year," he'd murmured, but Kagome's eyes cut up to him with such surprise that he realized she expected absolutely nothing from him for anything worth celebrating. He'd have to fix that, and he had a lot of time to make up for.

"You're staring, you know." He was, unashamedly, having stopped eating the dessert on his plate and moved to languidly sipping his whiskey as he appreciated the woman before him. "People will say things." She was playing with him, one freshly plucked eyebrow raised in his direction as she paused in her demolition of the torte to take a sip of the red wine in her glass. Inuyasha raised his eyebrow in return, uncaring, even if on an odd chance some other patrons could see them. They were situated before a window, completely covered from wandering eyes by indoor plants and a well placed decorative screen. The sun was just beginning to set, the color of it on Kagome's skin enchanting as the window splayed the light over the room, the way the shadows of the window panes settled over her chest highlighting the fullness there and causing his mind to go places it shouldn't at dinner. He hadn't planned it that way, for the two of them to be sat at such an intimate table as the sun fell beyond the horizon, though it did add some ambiance to their meal.

"Who could blame a man for being enraptured by such beauty? One glance and they would be just as possessed by you as I am." He was reward for his admission with a brief blush across her high cheek bones and a gasp of surprise. Rarely was he so amorous with her, always afraid that he would make her uncomfortable, but tonight he was determined to let her know, in the ways he deemed safe, that he was so wholly taken with her.

"Inuyasha…" It was a whisper on her lips, and he couldn't stop himself from reaching for the hand that had just set down her wine glass, leaning forward to press a kiss to her knuckles, her quick inhale of air meeting his ears to his satisfaction. He released her hand after only a moment, waving the waitress over to hand her his card to settle their bill.

"We should have split this, Yash." Kagome was looking at him like she already knew what he was about to say, like she was waiting for the other shoe to drop, both afraid and anticipatory. They never went out for dinner, always grabbing brunch or lunch at easily affordable places that Kagome didn't mind him paying for, not when she could buy groceries to make up for it. "Why didn't you ask for separate checks?"

"Haven't you been on a date before, love?" He watched, with baited breath as she leaned back with the information, spine straight as she reached for her now almost empty glass of wine absentmindedly as she chose her words.

"This is a date." She studied him carefully as she took a sip of wine. "This is our first date."

"That would depend on your definition of a date." He couldn't help but release a chuckle as she sputtered her wine, handing her the napkin she'd abandoned on the table once he realized she was fine. Kagome had once told him, when he'd been in Germany before, that she quantified a date as any time two people spent together with a purpose. "It could be cooking a meal, going for a walk, shopping. Anything really, if the intention of spending time together is there, if the couple sees it as special."

"We've been dating?" Kagome asked him that as he carefully dabbed around her mouth, a sort of frown on her face as she watched him return his glass to the table, clearly having reached the assumption he wanted her to. Inuyasha chose to remain silent as she analyzed the situation. "We're…we're together, together?"

"I can only answer for myself." The waitress returned then, handing Inuyasha back his card with a receipt, bowing politely when he thanked her for her service that evening. He trained his eyes back on Kagome, watching her as she watched him. "One word, Kagome, and I back off." He waited with baited breath as she trained her eyes on his own, downing the rest of the wine in her glass without a word.

"Let's get out of here," she murmured instead. "Before the sun sets completely." It was an answer without an answer, a trepidation in her inability to articulate her real response that made Inuyasha's stomach drop with anticipation as he saw the answer in her eyes, in the way she apprehensively reached her hand across the table to squeeze his own.

He pulled her up from the table with their joined hands, carefully stepping forward and cupping her cheek in his hand while they still had privacy, waiting just a moment to take in the anticipation before planting his lips on hers. If he had a doubt before, he had his reassurance now as her hands tightly held the labels of his suit jacket to keep him right there, in how she leaned her body against his with only the slightest pressing of his free hand to her lower back, in the way she seemed to melt at his touch.

Together.

It was a short trek to the hotel, and they easily made their way back after the hostess offered to take a couple photos of them in front of the gilded fountain in the entry way, an opportunity he'd jumped at as he'd handed his phone over to the teenage girl. The only photos he had of them were ones Rin had snuck as far back as last May, one of Kagome in his arms and looking a tad uncomfortable after she'd jumped from the tree, another of them from behind as they'd walked through the greenhouse at Fork, his hand on her lower back and her looking up at him with an eyebrow raised. Despite their close proximity in the images, they looked uncomfortable next to each other, if only to his eyes after seeing how her expression was supposed to soften as she looked at him. In the several taken this evening, they were pulled closely to one another, looking at each other and not the camera in one, Kagome smiling as he kissed her forehead in another. He'd been unaware the hostess had already started taking photos, thinking she was busy with another coworker, but he was already thoroughly distracted by Kagome, and he was wrong. It explained why, in a series of three, there were photos of them kissing, something Kagome would never have allowed if she had known. The first just before and loaded with anticipation, the pause he'd always felt just before they'd meet encapsulated in an image to prove it was real, the next the soft contact his lips had made with hers, Kagome's body relaxed and her hair spilling down her back as she craned her neck up to him. Stunning, he thought, how incredibly stunning she was wrapped in his arms, more beautiful than anything he'd ever seen. But the final shot was his favorite, he decided, the way he had been looking at Kagome with everything he was feeling in his eyes, a soft smile on his face, the way she'd been staring up at him with a delicacy that mirrored the fragility of her heart, the strength of her own affections reflected in her large brown orbs.

He sent them to Kagome, of course, after they'd gotten back up to the hotel room and she had excused herself to use the restroom. He was supposed to be ordering wine from the bar, but he took the time to send her the ones from Rin as well, thinking she might want them. The sun was just barely over the horizon now, and he moved to the window seat in the room to watch it go down after placing their order, Kagome joining him after just a moment on the little seat there. Selfishly, Inuyasha pulled her to him, settling her much more comfortably into his embrace and his lap, her head falling against his shoulder as they watched the ball of fire in sky sink even lower. He wanted to tell her, then, that he would be leaving before the night wore on too much longer, and he took a breath in to prepare himself when she cut him off with a whisper.

"Sunsets always make me think of you." Her words were soft, almost like she was afraid to speak, but he heard them nonetheless, both of their attentions still focused out of the window.

"Why's that?" He asked it after only a moment, almost forgetting to ask her as he inhaled her scent for the last time that evening, enjoying the remnants of his own on her skin.

"We always watched them together, back then, after a long day. We'd watch the sunset from a tree, or a hill, regardless of how angry I was at you. I don't think I've seen a sunset that compares to the ones from so long ago since." He could almost make out her expression in the window's reflection, but just as soon as his eyes focused, he felt himself transition, saw the way things became less focused and the way Kagome's scent in his nose was reduced to the smell of her skin directly next to his face.

"In the country," he started, "away from all of this development and traffic, out of the smog and up in a tree somewhere, I'm sure we could find a sunset like those." Kagome only hmmed before relaxing into him further. "But the others were there too, Kagome. You can't think of just me when you see them."

"Not the same way, Inuyasha," she retaliated. "You know that." He contemplated for a moment, thinking of all the things that he'd done with others that would always make him think of Kagome, empathizing with her. He never took anyone up with him into trees anymore, rare occasions permitting with his nephews or nieces, nor did he ever carry another on his back unless it was necessary.

"I didn't show you love the way I should have. I was so afraid that loving you meant I wasn't keeping my promise to Kikyou, even while you were right there, patient and kind and understanding. I was determined to maintain my word, but you gave me so much more than I deserved. You still give me more than I deserve." He was unsurprised when Kagome sat up and turned around to face him, and he helped her maneuver her legs so that she wouldn't fall.

"Do you always get so self-depreciating on your human nights now? You did the best you could, Inuyasha. It isn't a matter of deserving something, having earned something, having reciprocated enough. What have you endured, how much have you suffered? Allow yourself some happiness, even if it's brief." Inuyasha considered her for a moment, interrupted from his musing with a knock at the door, followed by a quick shout of room service. "I'm going to take off these tights while you get that. They're rather scratchy." She winked at him before peeling herself out of his embrace and disappearing into the attached bathroom while he answered the door, allowing the attendant into the room to unload the cart at the wet bar in the suite before bolting the door shut behind him as he left. He took the time to remove his tie and untuck his shirt before pouring himself and Kagome each a glass of wine and settling onto the couch in front of the gas fire, kicking off his shoes and socks on the carpet there. She joined him after just a moment, legs bare and looking much more comfortable than she had had before, easily settling in next to him and taking a long sip of wine before turning to look at him.

"I need to tell you something, now, before it gets too late and I chicken out." Inuyasha downed the rest of the wine he'd been drinking before facing Kagome, who had already finished half of her glass in another long sip and was working on getting rest down as fast as possible.

"Okay," he said tentatively, "what's on your mind?"

"The well opened today." She punctuated the statement with a sip of the alcoholic beverage, not meeting his gaze.

"And you're still here." He said it cautiously, not wanting to upset her, but trying to figure out what exactly had happened.

"I sealed it. Permanently." Kagome set her second glass of wine down, fiddling with one of her earrings as she looked down at the couch and not at his eyes. "If we're…with what you said at dinner…I just think you deserve to know it was me who made the well never open again, it's me who caused you all that pain." Inuyasha was silent, trying to figure out what to say that would alleviate some of the tension in Kagome's face. He, honestly, was unbothered that Kagome had sealed the well, that she'd chosen not to travel back in time. Inuyasha had already lived his life with her not coming back to him, and if changing that meant he didn't get her across from him now, if that meant he didn't get her in the mornings and in the evenings undressed or wrapped in his clothing, if that meant he lost all of this, he didn't want it to happen. Kagome made the right choice, because the choice had already been made for her, had already been made for them.

"You were there," she started suddenly, mistaking Inuyasha's silence for him being upset. "So was Shippo. He was angry at you, he was trying to travel through the well, and I closed it. But I saw you right before and you looked so young, Inuyasha, younger than Souta and all I could think, all I could see, was this you. I couldn't do it, Inuyasha, I'm so sorry. I couldn't go back and take away all the hurt and save you the pain…I know that if I had gone back I would have been your…wife and your mate and that we would have had children, and I don't want you to think that it didn't kill me to have to let that life go because it did. But I couldn't leave this you, even if that means… I know we won't-"

Inuyasha cut her off abruptly, hauling her body against his and capturing her words with his mouth, almost bruising, he was sure, with the force of his hands against her hips as he held her to him. He tried to deepen his kiss, to try to distract her, but Kagome pulled away from him, her hands forceful against his shoulders. He relented, breaking his contact with her lips but lightly keeping his hands on her hips regardless.

"Yash," she hissed it her eyes narrowed at him, "we need to talk about this. This is a big deal."

"You're absolutely right, this is a big deal. Today," he brushed a kiss to the right side her neck, mirroring one on the other side after just a moment, "you had the opportunity to have everything you ever wanted." He punctuated his sentence with a kiss to her lips, deep and searing, one he wished would burn the depth of his emotions there for her to really know, to truly understand. "And yet you chose me." He finally freed one of her hips to thread his fingers through her hair, angling her head down to make eye contact with him. "Am I wrong?"

"No," she whispered softly, her eyes searching his as he hoisted her up and stood completely from the couch, her legs wrapping around his waist automatically to steady herself.

"Then there is nothing left to talk about." Even in his human form, Kagome's weight was easy for him to bear with one hand, so he used his one free hand to start unzipping her dress as he took measured steps further back into the suite. "Is there?"

"There's still plenty to talk about, Inuyasha." Her words suggested she wanted to stop, but the way her forehead came to rest against his, the way her hands tangled themselves into his hair, how her breath hitched when he pressed a kiss to her neck again, they all said something else.

"You're right, I leave for Berlin in a week." Kagome pushed back from him to look in his face as he stopped just at the foot of the bed.

"What?" She looked thoroughly shocked, her eyebrows high on her forehead as she studied his features. "And you think now is the right moment to tell me this?"

"There isn't a right moment. There will always be obstacles, Kagome, but I'm tired of the letting the obstacles control us. Right now, we can either spend the entire night making conversation about why you sealed the well, even if I'm not bothered by it. For hours, I could make excuse after excuse about Berlin, easily make a compelling argument for why I want you to join me there. Or," he gently eased her onto the bed, immediately leaning over her to stare into her eyes. "We can take what time we have and use it to make something else entirely."

"Inu-" his name was swallowed in a gasp as he gave into his twitching hand and ran it up her skirt, carefully cupping her anatomy there.

"We can make conversation tomorrow, my love, when I'm too afraid of being like this with you. But for tonight, let's make love. Over and over until we can't anymore, until it's too much to bare. We won't get this chance again, not before I have to leave. Can I show you what your choice means to me," Inuyasha pressed a soft, sweet kiss to her lips with the words, "will you let me show you what you mean to me?"

He pulled back, halting his movements completely to watch Kagome below him, to analyze her reaction to his words. She was looking for something in his face, her eyes darting back and forth as she considered him. Her gaze dropped further then, running over the length of his shoulders and his torso before her hands took over, the dark brown of her irises flitting back up and meeting his violet ones head on as she made quick work of completely unbuttoning his shirt. He allowed her to move without interceding her, followed her wishes as she pushed his dress shirt off of his shoulders and down his arms before chucking it off the bed. He only flinched minutely as she moved to carefully untuck his undershirt before pulling that over his head and throwing it onto the floor next to the bed as well. Inuyasha had turned his head to make sure it was in safe place, wary of the double-sided fireplace between the bedroom and the living room of the hotel suite, but Kagome's fingers tracing the lines of his abdomen brought him back to the moment. He was unable to do anything but watch as she unbuckled his belt and slid it from the out of his belt loops in one swift pull, a clang reaching his ears as it was discarded on the ground with the growing pile of his clothing.

She sat up then, her eyes still on his as she pushed away and stood on the side of the bed, carefully shimmying out of her dress to reveal a lingerie set he hadn't seen yet, a strapless, navy and lace bustier that was paired with a pull lace panty. Did he actually blab, once before, about liking navy on her? He'd have to ask, but most likely later when she wasn't looking at him with an intensity she had never looked at him with before.

"Kami," his whispered despite his resolution to let Kagome take her time to decide what she wanted of him, hands reaching out to pull her closer to the bed. Kagome stopped him, however, grabbing his hands and pulling him up to her, only allowing his hands to run over her body when he was in front of her. Her eyes were on his, her fingers nimble as she made quick work of the button and zipper of his pants. They instantly fell, and he stepped out of them, surprised when instead of finally getting his answer, he was tortured with Kagome's hands running over his body, her lips on his chest as she kissed him gently there. Inuyasha couldn't stand it anymore, and he wrapped one arm around her waist before cupping her face delicately with the other. He kissed her with a patient and gentleness he so rarely gave, pulling her to stand between his knees as he sat on the edge of the bed and languidly coaxed her lips and tongue with his own.

"Kagome," he began softly once he finally had the strength to pull away from her, "will you let me show you how much I love you?" He bore into her eyes with his own, confused as to if she would give him the opportunity he wanted, if she would let go of the same reservations he had easily laid down with the slightest reassurance that she felt something for him that came with her choosing him.

"Yes." It was barely a whisper, his human ears hardly able to perceive what she had said, more an exhale than a spoken word. Still, he hauled her on top of him instantly, wrapping her legs around his waist as he let the one syllable ring in his head. She had chosen him, she was choosing him, she wanted him. It wasn't a definitive solution to their problem, didn't offer a long-term commitment or a reassurance that things would be okay. But, he could worry about those in the morning, could find a suitable way to deal with the distance, could fine comb the reasons why Kagome had closed the well

But tonight?

Tonight he was going to prove to her, once and for all, that she was made for him, and he was made for her.

A/N: Hi all!

I had a wonderful three week hiatus, in case you were wondering, and it was only after I forced myself to sit down and write something that I got here. A full chapter of Inuyasha, which will be followed by a full chapter of Kagome next time. Hopefully, that will be next weekend, but I'm going to be honest, my work schedule is honest to goodness the worst over the next month and I don't know how I will pull through that, but we will see!

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this, especially as we draw to a close. I originally wrote the last scene from Kagome's perspective, which was one of the motivating factors for this entire chapter because I thought it would be nice to hear Inuyasha's side of Kagome closing the well. In addition, I wanted to show how much Inuyasha cares for Kagome beyond sexual intentions. I find there is typically a review each chapter concerning this being one sided, meaning Kagome loves Inuyasha and he does not love her, and that worries me only because I thought I was doing a better job of showing how much they both care for each other. I hope this clears the air.

All love, K. Marjorie