"I know yer feelin' better, but I still want ya to stay here, okay?" My brother informed me.
"But I'm okay, though." I put my hands on my hips.
He let out a small laugh. "I know, but…I just wanna be safe, all right. Just stay here. Just fer today."
I thought for a minute and decided not to argue. "Oh, all right." I pouted. He gave me a quick hug then left.
I wasn't sure what to do after that. I decided to listen to some music on the iPod I found. The songs on it weren't great, but it was something. I laid on my bed on my stomach and sang along with the music. I learned a lot of the songs and quickly.
"Twenty-twenty-twenty four hours to go I want to be sedated
Nothing to do and no where to go-o-oh I want to be sedated
Just get me to the airport put me on a plane
Hurry hurry hurry before I go insane
I can't control my fingers I can't control my brain
Oh no o—
Just then, I thought I heard a thud so I paused the music and looked out the window. I didn't see anything. "Oh well." I shrugged. I pressed play and continued singing along.
"Twenty-twenty-twenty four hours to go I want to be sedated
Nothing to do and no where to go-o-oh I want to be sedate—"
I heard the noise again. "What the hell?" I got up and looked around outside again. I still didn't see anything.
I walked out of my room and into the kitchen. That's when I saw a walker at the back door. I pulled out my knife and opened the door just a crack then stabbed it in the head.
I brushed my hands on each other. "Well, that takes care 'a that." I said. I went back into the my room and back to my music.
"Just put me to the wheelchair get me on a plane
Hurry hurry hurry before I go insane
I can't control my fingers I can't control my brain
Oh no oh
Twenty-twenty-twenty four hours to go I want to be sedated
Nothing to do and no where to go-o-oh I want to be sedated
Just put me in a wheelchair get me to the show
Hurry hurry hurry before I go loco
I can't control my fingers I can't control my toes
Oh no oh
Twenty-twenty-twenty four hours to go I want to be sedated
Nothing to do and no where to go-o-oh I want to be sedated
Just put me in a wheelchair get me to the show
Hurry hurry hurry before I go loco
I can't control my fingers I can't control my toes
Oh no oh
Ba-ba-bamp-ba ba-ba-ba-bamp-ba I want to be sedated
Ba-ba-bamp-ba ba-ba-ba-bamp-ba I want to be sedated
Ba-ba-bamp-ba ba-ba-ba-bamp-ba I want to be sedated
Ba-ba-bamp-ba ba-ba-ba-bamp-ba I want to be sedated
Ba-ba-bamp-ba ba-ba-ba-bamp-ba I want to be sedated"
I was in the same spot I was when I heard my brother come in. I just stayed that way and continued to listen to music. "Everythang okay?" Daryl asked me walking into the room.
"Yup!" I said without looking up at him.
"Yer still feelin' good? Ya ain't sick again?"
"Nope." I shook my head.
"Good." My brother cleared is throat and took something out of his bag. "I, uh…picked these up fer ya." I looked up to see a box of tampons, I didn't miss the nervous look my brother had on his face. I almost laughed.
"Oh, thanks. Could ya put 'em under the sink in the bathroom?" I went back to my music. He didn't say anything just hurriedly left the room with them.
He came back about three minutes later and just stood there. I looked up at him and he was just staring at me with the weirdest expression. I raised an eyebrow then paused the song. "What is it?" I asked.
Daryl seemed nervous and hesitated. "…what, uh…is everythang okay?"
"Yeah? What do ya mean?"
"Well, I just, uh…there's two other boxes of…them things under the sink and they're not opened."
I waited for him to say something else but he didn't. "Yeah?" I raised an eyebrow. "What's yer question?"
He looked really nervous. "…are ya not gettin'…yer…ya know, thang?"
I almost wanted to laugh at him again. "Oh yeah." I waved him off and looked back down at my iPod, scrolling through to find another song. "I don't get that no more."
"What do ya mean ya don't get it no more?" He said. I looked back up at him. He had a concerned look on his face.
"I don't know." I shrugged. "It just stopped one day."
"How long ago?"
I had to think back for a minute. "…maybe like…five months." His eyes widened and he just stared at me. "What?"
"Le…that cain't be good." My brother said. "What if there's somethin' wrong? What if…" He trailed off and looked like he was thinking. Then, he narrowed his eyes at me. "You sure you and that guy didn't have sex?"
"Daryl." I said rolling my eyes. "I'm positive I didn't have sex with Chad."
"No, not that one. I mean that Jay guy back at—
"Are you serious?" I jumped up. "Of course I know I didn't do it with that…that…psycho!"
"Okay, okay. I'm sorry. Calm down." He sat down on the bed. "I'm just…worried about ya, you know that."
"Yeah." I said with my head down. "It's probably nothin'. I bet it cuz my weight."
"What?"
"I remember this girl at school once told me that her older sister don't get her period as much no more cuz she lost a bunch 'a weight."
"Oh." He narrowed his eyes again and said roughly. "Well, then, yer gonna have to eat more. I'm gonna make sure of it."
"Daryl." I whined. "I don't get hungry like you. I cain't eat that much."
"Well, you can eat a little more." He said with raised eyebrows. "Got it?"
I sighed. "Yeah, got it."
That night, Daryl and I had spaghetti for dinner. It was a nice change. We couldn't have it with meatballs, obviously, but it was just fine with noodles and sauce. It really hit the spot and I actually finished all of mine for a change. I just wanted my brother to get off my back about eating.
The next three or four days nothing special happened. It was the same stuff; we ate, we played games, we slept. Everything was fine and was going great.
However on this particular day, I woke up in some serious pain. I had a terrible headache and everything was killing me. It hurt to move! I didn't even know what to do but to lay there. "Daryl!" I called for my brother. "Daryl, help!" He came running into the room.
"What? What's wrong?" He asked. I could hear the concern in his voice.
"Somethin's wrong." I cried. "It hurts."
"What does? What hurts?" He rushed over to me and sat on the bed.
"Everythang." I cried. "It hurts to move…and my head. It hurts so bad."
"Okay, okay." My brother said frantically. He looked lost. "I'm gonna get ya some Advil."
"Okay." I said weakly. He disappeared then came back about two minutes later with pills and a bottle of water.
"Here, baby. Can ya sit up?"
"No." I answered.
"Okay." He nodded. "Here." He put the pills in my mouth then held the water bottle for me. I took a gulp and swallowed the pills. I panted. "Just relax, baby. Relax." He pushed my hair. "Oh my. You feel really warm." He looked concerned.
"Daryl." I cried. "I'm really scared. What's wrong with me?"
"It's okay." He tried to calm me. "Just wait fer the pills to kick in. You'll feel better soon."
"I'm hot and tired." I said weakly.
"Well, if yer tired try to go back to sleep." Daryl petted me. All of a sudden, I felt dizzy and laid back panting and sweating. "Sissy? You okay?" I heard my brother talking to me but for some reason, I could not respond. I just laid there weakly.
I opened my eyes and the pain from before was gone. My brother was sitting on the bed next to me. "Daryl?" I called weakly.
"Sissy, you okay?"
"What happened?" I asked him.
"Ya passed out yesterday. How ya feelin'?"
"Yesterday? I been knocked out that long?" My eyes grew wide.
"…yeah." Daryl said. "How ya feelin' today? I want an answer."
I sat up slowly. "Well…I still feel bad but not as bad. I'm still hot and tired and…" I grimaced as I sat there. "My back hurts."
"Well, lay back down then."
"No, that makes it worse." I grimaced. "It hurts real bad. It feels like somethin' on it."
"Lemme see." My brother got up and went behind me. Gently lifting my shirt, then he gasped. "Oh, Le." He said.
"What?" I asked alarmed. "What is it?" He just gave me a concerned look. I weakly hopped out of bed and went over to the mirror, turned around and lifted my shirt. "Oh no! What is it?" There was a really strange looking rash or something on my back. It was sort of like a bull's eye pattern. "Daryl? What is it?" I grew frantic.
"…I-I don't know." My brother stammered. I could tell he was lost and didn't know what to say or do.
Just then, I started to cry. "I'm scared."
"Hey, hey, don't cry." My brother hugged me. "Don't worry. It's gonna be okay. Come on, now. Get back in bed." He helped me into my bed.
Daryl stayed there with me all day. I made a joke about not being able to finish the book I was currently reading, so my brother read some of it to me. I told him he didn't have to, but he did anyway. I have to admit, it did take my mind off things for a while.
My brother helped take a drink of water. I coughed after I swallowed. "Easy." He said. I settled down and looked Daryl in the eyes.
"I really don't feel good, ya know?" I said weakly.
"I know." He pushed my hair back. "I know ya don't."
"No, but I mean…I really don't feel good." I breathed out loudly. "It's taken all my energy just to say that sentence. I don't thank I'm gonna make it."
"Stop." He scolded. "Don't talk like that."
"But it's the truth!" I tried to yell. "I don't know what this is or where it even came from, but…everythang hurts, Daryl." I cried. "It hurts to even move, I'm weak as hell, my head hurts, I'm so so tired." I laid my head back and breathed. "I got this weird rash and high fever and now I cain't even breathe."
"You cain't breathe?" My brother asked alarmed and moved closer to me.
"I sure am havin' trouble." I said weakly and breathed out. Daryl looked down for a long time then finally looked back at me.
"Sissy…I-I don't know what to say. I just don't know." He grabbed my hand. "Just…try to get some sleep, okay? That's the only thang I think will help ya right now."
"Okay." I said weakly. I just leaned back and breathed trying to relax.
Things were quiet for a few minutes then my brother finally spoke. "Did anyone ever tell ya about the day you was born?"
I opened my eyes and looked at him. "Mm-mmm." I shook my head. I was curious, though.
"Well…I have to say, and don't feel bad, but we wasn't too happy about havin' a baby in the house with us. Ya know, cryin' all the time?" He smirked. I smiled weakly. "Well, everyone was so sure you was gonna be a girl. But I says, 'nope, it's gonna be boy.' I was damn sure of it." He paused and swallowed. "I was wrong. You was a girl, just like yer mama and everyone said. And I was even more unhappy when they told me. I didn't want an annoyin' teenage girl livin' in the house with us, ya know?" He teased. I tried to laugh. "But then, I looked at ya…and I held ya. You was so tiny. So fragile and innocent. And that's when I knew it was my job to protect ya. I had to keep ya safe." He smiled. "And from that moment on, you was my girl." He rubbed my cheek with his thumb. I smiled. "Merle was jealous. You would cry whenever he held ya. I was the only one that could get ya to go to sleep…and get ya to eat." He narrowed his eyes at me. "Yer still the same." I laughed weakly.
"Ya never told me that." I smiled. He smiled back.
Suddenly, I felt extremely dizzy again. "You never…you never…uh..."
"Sissy? Sissy?" I heard Daryl say. I was too weak to answer. And then, I must have passed out again.
I awoke to the sound of my brother's voice. He was talking but not to me. I was confused, he didn't notice I was awake. I pretended to be asleep and listened to him.
"Look, I don't do this very often, but…I'm only doin' it now cuz I need a miracle. I mean a real miracle." My brother said. I gasped inside. I think he's praying! "I know I ain't the best person, but…my sister is. She's the sweetest thang I ever did see, and…and I cain't lose her." He started to cry. "I cain't. She's just a kid…she tells me how much she needs me. But the truth is…I need her. Way more than she needs me." He wiped at his tears. "So, please…please don't take her from me. Not yet, she's so young. And I need her." He stopped after that and kept his head down.
I really wanted to get up and hug him tightly, but I didn't. I couldn't. I just laid there and still pretended to be asleep. I have never in my life heard Daryl pray. And hearing him do it now about me being sick scared me to death.
I don't think I'm going to make it…and apparently neither does my brother.
"Daryl?" I pretended to stir in my sleep.
"Yeah, baby?"
"I know ya told me not to talk about it— I coughed. "But it needs to be said." He was giving me a sad look. "Don't kill me…till ya know I'm dead fer sure…"
Daryl was silent a minute. He stared at me with a sad look. "…baby." He grabbed my hand and started shaking his head. "I would never—
"Just promise." I cut him off. "Please." He stared at me and started to tear up.
Nodding rapidly, he said, "I promise."
I was able to breathe a sigh of relief after that. I smiled at him. I thought for a minute, now was the perfect time to ask him. A better time than ever. I may not get the chance in the morning. "And another thang," he looked at me, "I heard ya talkin' to Mr. Man that one night. I know what happened to me, why I'm like this."
My brother's eyes widened. "You-you heard that, sweetie?"
I nodded weakly. "Why didn't ya ever tell me?" I started to feel emotional and tears welled up in my eyes.
"I just…we just…didn't want ya to feel like…like you was…" He trailed off trying to think of the right words to say.
"A retard? Crippled? A dumbass?"
"Le, don't say that." He scolded me. "But…yeah, in a way." Now he looked like he was getting emotional. "I'm sorry I kept it from ya. I know we promised not to keep secrets no more. It's just…" He sniffled.
I suddenly felt guilty. "Hey, Daryl, it's okay." I reassured him. "I-I understand."
"Ya do?"
I nodded. "And thank you."
He gave me a weird look. "Fer what?"
"Fer not ever treatin' me different." I smiled.
He looked a little shocked maybe? Then, his expression softened and he gave me a small smile and grabbed my hand, rubbing his thumb over the top of my hand. I felt better that we talked about it.
Suddenly, I got that weak and dizzy feeling again and felt so tired. Way more tired than before. I laid my head back and closed my eyes.
Hey, guys! :D I hope you all are enjoying this story so far! The title of this chapter is a hint of what's wrong with Le ;)