Chapter 4

*Bella*

"So, spill, Bella. What's going on? You're acting way weird," Jake says as he watches me pace back and fourth on the front porch of my house.

"Jake, I don't know, I think I'm going insane!" I say, taking deep breaths as I lean on the porch rail.

"What's new? Seriously, talk to me." he says, crossing his arms.

Where do I begin? How do I even tell him what's on my mind? If I say it's about a guy, he will get way overprotective, and I hate when he gets overprotective. I turn to him, trying to find the right words to say without giving him too many details.

I take a deep breath and go for it. "Okay, see I've been feeling something for someone."

Jake's face lights up like a Christmas tree and I have this sinking feeling he's thinking something I'm not. He suddenly looks at me with curiosity.

"Okay, and this someone feels the same way?" he asks.

"I think he does, but see, I can't be with him and he knows that. What do I do Jake?" Gee, here I am talking to Jacob Black, my werewolf best friend, about boys! I really am utterly insane now! I think I need to be put away in a mental hospital.

"What do you want to do? What does your heart say?" Jake asks.

I look into his eyes and smile. He always knows what to say. He is standing next to me, leaning on the porch rail with a concerned look on his face.

"My heart is confused" I say softly.

"I've never seen you so caught up about someone. And since when do you come to me for guy advice? Isn't that something you do with your girlfriends at slumber parties?"

I just can't see myself at a slumber party with Jessica talking guys, fashion, shopping, or anything like that. I especially couldn't talk to her about the one guy that's on my mind.

"I can't talk to Jessica about this. You know me better than anyone, and you're the only one I feel comfortable around."

He leans closer to me. Why is he leaning closer? He takes my hand in his. His skin is super warm, a werewolf thing, but it feels good.

"Well, for a big hairy wolf, I'm glad I make you comfortable," he says as he gently squeezes my hand.

I laugh and lay my head on his shoulder. He's always been like a brother to me. I feel at home with him.

"Seriously, what is your heart saying?" he asks softly.

"I shouldn't deny what I'm feeling. It's crazy! I shouldn't be feeling what I'm feeling for this person." I lift my head off his shoulder and step away from him, pacing once again.

"Are you in love with this guy?" Jake asks, taking my hand and stopping me from pacing. He takes my other hand and I notice he looks really nervous.

Shouldn't I be the one that's nervous, because I'm about to admit to my best friend I might be in love.

"I think I am," I say softly.

"Bella, I think I might be in love too," he murmurs.

I look at him, shocked and surprised.

"Really?" I ask. This is new to me.

"Yeah, I was waiting for HER to feel the same way."

"Well, does she?"

Without warning, Jake is pulling me closer, his massive arms around my waist, and the next thing I know his lips are on mine.

What? What's going on? I push him away and, without thinking, I hit him sqaure in the jaw.

"Ouch!" I yell. It's like my fist hit a cement wall.

"What the hell, bella?" he yells.

"Where did that come from?" I ask him, holding my hand.

"I was waiting for you to feel the same way." He reaches up and rubs his jaw.

"What? What the hell are you talking about?" I yell as I cringe in pain, feeling my knuckles swell. I stomp inside to get some ice for my hand.

"What the hell were you talking about? I'm confused here," he says, following me into the kitchen.

"I was talking about someone else! Not you! You idiot werewolf!" I yell. I seriously think my hand is broken. I didn't realize his jaw was that hard.

"Wait, so you weren't talking about me?"

"No, Jake! I wasn't talking about you! And where you got that idea is beyond me! God! I swear…" I'm angry that he kissed me and that his hard jaw possibly broke my hand! Stupid werewolf!

"Then who the hell were you talking about?".

"Nevermind! You kissed me! I can't believe you did that!" I yell, cradling my injured hand.

"Look, let me take you to the hospital," he says taking my hand to exmaine it. I pull it away.

"No! Jake, just leave," I say turning my back on him.

"Bella…"

I cut him off. "Just go, Jake, okay?"

He huffs, "Fine." Then he stomps out and slams the door behind him.

How am I going to explain this one to Lucy when she gets home? Hi, oh, my hand? Well, see, a werewolf named Jacob Black took it upon himself to kiss me, so I decked him right in the jaw! Yeah, she'll really believe that one.

I look at the clock and realize what time it is.

Stupid Jacob Black! Stupid Edward Cullen! Stupid Feelings! Argh! I just want to throw something and scream.

I make an ice pack and hold it on my hand. I'm thinking about what just happened when I hear a commotion outside. It sounds like Jake and….oh god!

I go to the window and see a shiny, silver Volvo sitting in the driveway. I look over and see Jake and Edward standing on the lawn.

Oh, no! This isn't good.

Edward shoves Jake hard and I rush outside.

"What are you doing?" I yell.

"Let's go bloodsucker!" Jake yells as he charges at Edward.

Edward seems to disappear, moving so quickly it's nearly a blur, and he's suddenly behind Jake.

Jake growls and spins around, preparing to attack him again. This time I step in between them.

"Stop!" I yell.

"What is he doing here, Bella?" Jake asks through a snarl.

"Jake, just go," I say, holding my arms out, pushing them both away from each other.

"You making me leave?" he asks, looking at me with anger in his eyes.

"Jake, please!" I look at him and then glance back at Edward.

"I get it now," he says, backing away.

"Jake it's not like that," I whisper..

"No, I get it! I guess I don't know you that well after all," he says, stepping away.

"Jake," I turn toward him, reaching out.

"No, don't even, Bella!" He turns and starts running.

I chase after him, finally catching up to him behind the house.

"Jake, wait. Please," I say softly.

"Why should I? I've been waiting for way too long, Bella, and here you are telling me you're in love..." he takes a deep breath, "and it's not with me."

I didn't know he felt this way - until now.

*Edward*

I know eavsedropping is not becoming of me, but right now I couldn't care less. I listen to every little thought that's in Jacob Black's head. I can't really help it when he's constantly yelling. It's taking all my strength not to pull his head off and rip him to pieces. I hate this feeling they call jealousy.

"Jake, I…I don't know what to say," she says.

I grip the car tightly, trying to keep the monster from showing its ugly face. I wish Bella would come to her senses. Does she not realize how unpredictable those mutts can be? One wrong move and…I cant even think about that. It hurts too much.

"You're in love with a bloodsucking monster. What is there to say? You know how I feel about them. You know its duty is to kill everyone it sees, and here you are being friendly with one?" He rakes his hand through his hair. "Do you go to his house? Do you hang out with him like you hang out with me? Seriously, come on, Bella! He is one of the monsters that killed your parents!" Jacob yells as he starts to shake. I can feel the heat radiating from his body.

"Jacob, calm down and listen to me. He isn't like the rest of them. Well, at least I don't think he is," Bella replies.

She's right. I'm not like the rest of them. But, I'm still a monster.

"Bella, I...love you. I love you more than anything on this earth," he says.

It's like I can see through his eyes. He leans in and kisses her softly on the lips.

I grip the side of the car trying to keep myself in control. That mutt has his lips on her, and the things he is thinking….

*Bella*

My best friend loves me and…I don't know how to react to this.

"I know you have to feel the same way, Bella. You can't be in love with a killer," he says holding my face in his warm hands.

I look down and pull away. "You can't tell me who I can and can't love, Jake," I murmur.

He steps back, and I know this is upsetting him.

"I can't believe it." He shakes his head in disbelief. "I guess it will be like your dead to me." He frowns, "I'll miss you, Bella," he says as he turns and runs into the forest, disappearing into the vast green foliage.

I want to run after him but I can't move. After a long moment I make my way back to front of the house where Edward is waiting, leaning against his car.

I glare at him.

"Bella..." he says softly.

"Don't." I hold up my hand to silence him. "I have nothing to say to you." I walk back up to the front of the house.

He follows me. "Can we at least talk," he asks.

"No." I go inside and slam the door on him.

I think he and Jake my made my life enough of a living hell for today. Besides, my hand is still throbbing.

"Bella," Edward says through the door.

"Go away!" I yell.

"Look, my father is a doctor, the least I can do is get him to look at your hand for you," he says through the door.

I hold my hand; it's hurting pretty bad. Leaning against the door, I consider his offer.

I really don't like hospitals, and I know if Lucy finds out about this she will freak.

"Fine. Wait a minute," I mutter as I go to the kitchen and scribble a messy, left-handed note for Lucy and stick it to the refrigerator with two tacky looking magnets.

I stand in front of the door for a long moment before I open it to Edward's sexy smile.

"I know you hate hospitals," he says softly.

"Do you know what else I hate?" I ask him.

"What?"

"Annoying vampires who think they know everything and idiot werewolves who have hard jaws," I mutter walking to his shiny new Volvo.

"You're right about the werewolves, they are idiots," he says as he opens the door for me.

"Look, I don't want to talk about Jacob right now, okay? My hand is hurting like hell and I just want to get this over with. I appreciate you doing this, because I know Lucy would freak if she came home and found my hand broken and you and Jacob fighting on the lawn, and then she would start asking questions, and then I might have to tell her, 'Oh, yeah! Well, see, I hit a stupid werewolf in the jaw because he tried to kiss me and then he starts a fight with a vampire in the driveway!' Yeah, I can see her face now," I say before getting into the car.

I climb in and immediately notice the new car scent. Seriously? Did he just buy this car? The inside looks so new, like it has never been touched. Wow! He's a vampire with money.

"So, you don't think she will freak out if she finds out you're not home and with me instead?" he asks.

"I left a note and hopefully she won't ask about the hand," I say with a smile.

"Look, I'm sorry about…"

I stop him from saying another word. "Don't, please, I will take care of the whole Jacob thing. He can't stay mad at me forever," I say softly.

Before I know it, we pull up to a beautiful house. Edward walks with me to the front door and we are instantly greeted by Alice. She is pratically jumping for joy when she sees me.

"Edward, I'm so glad you brought her over here!"

"Alice, this is not a social visit. Is Carlisle home?" he asks.

"Yeah, he's in his office." She glances at my injured hand. "Oh, so the werewolf did break your hand," Alice says.

"How did she…" I start to ask.

"Well, see, I have this uncanny ability to see things before they happen." She smiles as she ushers me inside.

Wow! A psychic vampire! Go figure!

Walking in the house is amazing. It's spacious, bright, and to think I thought vampires lived in dark caves and slept in coffins.

"Carlisle," Edward says and I turn my attention to him.

"Edward, who do we have here?" He asks politely. I smile at him. He seems genuine to the core, very respectable. I would never think in a million years he is a bloodsucking monster.

"This is Bella Swan, a friend from school. I wanted you to look at her hand," Edward says.

"Nice to meet you Miss Swan. Why don't we take a step into my office so I can take a look at that hand," he says with a warm smile.

Why is it I can trust him so easily? I follow him to his office. My mouth pops open as we walk in. His office is huge. Edward said he was a Doctor. How is it a vampire can be a doctor? I find it very strange.

"So you're a doctor?" I ask as he motions for me to take a seat.

"Yes," he says as he comes over and takes my hand to examine it.

"And you're…a vampire? How is that possible?"

He smiles at my question and I wince in pain as he touches and moves my hand around.

"Anything is possible. I chose not to be like others."

"So, you don't kill people then?" I ask.

"No, I think your hand will be fine. I'm going to wrap it - it's just bruised. What did you do, hit it against a rock?" He laughs as he goes to a drawer and pulls out some supplies for my hand.

"Well, I kind of punched a werewolf in the face," I murmur.

"Miss Swan, please do be careful next time. Edward worries about you." He starts to wrap my hand.

I'm surprised. I didn't know Edward talked to his family about me.

"He does?" I ask curiously.

"Ever since he's met you he has changed. He seems happier." Carlisle finishes wrapping my hand and tapes the wrap down.

"Carlisle...can I call you that?" I ask. I don't want to be rude.

"Yes, you can," he says softly.

"Did Edward tell you a lot about me?"

"He only tells us what he wants us to know." He pats my hand. "There, your hand will be fine," he says with a smile.

"Thanks, this is so much better than going to the emergency room," I say holding my wrapped hand up.

"Free of charge." He smiles and winks.

"Thank you," I say, feeling rather weird because I'm talking to a vampire who happens to be a doctor.

"How do you do it? I mean..be a doctor knowing what you are?" I ask curiously.

"It isn't easy, but I've had years of practice to control myself."

"Is Edward like you? I mean, will he be able to control himself?" I ask softly. I am curious about this. My biggest fear is he will lose control and I will be the one to pay for it. I don't know if I can believe anything he says.

"He has for some time now. If you're afraid he will lose control with you, he wontn and I will make sure of that."

I take a deep breath. I need to know more about Edward and I know Carlisle is the best source for information.

"I want to trust Edward," I whisper, wondering if Edward is listening.

"Let me ask you this, Bella, are you in love with my son?"

"Well, I've never felt like this about anyone before, but I feel like I can't love him knowing, well, knowing what he is. He is one of the same monsters that killed my parents." I look down, playing with my wrapped hand.

"Your parents were killed by vampires?" Carlisle asks.

Tears start filling my eyes. "Yes, and I saw the whole thing," I say, wiping the tears from my eyes.

"Edward never mentioned this," he says softly.

I don't know what else to say. I feel like a weight was lifted off my chest. I take a deep breath once again. I am about to say something when a soft knock on the door interrupts.

"Come in," Carlisle says.

Edward walks in. I turn to him, wipe my tears from eyes, and smile.

"Everything ok?" he asks softly.

I hold my wrapped hand up. "Yeah, great. No broken hand just sore. Stupid werewolf." I smile.

"I was just getting to know Bella here," Carlisle says.

Edward looks at me curiously and then looks back at Carlisle. I guess he didn't hear our conversation. Good.

"Bella, I think I should take you home," he says softly, touching my shoulder.

"Edward, you should invite Bella over tomorrow night. Let her meet the rest of the family, and I can take another look that hand," Carlisle says, standing as we all walk out of the office.

We are met at the front door by Alice. "Bella! Leaving already?" she asks in a disappointed tone.

"Yeah, I need to get home before my aunt Lucy freaks," I say with a smile.

She looks at me and laughs like she knows something I don't.

"She won't be freaked because you're not home. She'll be freaked because a guy is dropping you off. When you get home, be prepared to answer a ton of questions," Alice says with a smile.

"Alice," Edward says sternly.

"What? I can't help my visions." She hugs me tightly.

"Thanks for the warning," I whisper as I hug her back.

"Anytime, and don't go punching werewolves again. Okay?" She says as we walk outside toward the car.

"Alice can be annoying sometimes," Edward says.

"What am I going to tell Lucy? She already thinks I'm nuts. She wants to commit me. It's bad enough she thinks I need to see some quack doctor because I have issues." I realize that I'm rambling too much and I need to seriously shut up. I lean against the car and take a deep breath.

"I like your rambling" he says with a sexy smile.

"Is there any way I can block you from my head? Because, seriously, that's getting annoying."

He opens my car door for me and leans over, his cold breath touching my face. He softly brushes his cold lips on mine and I feel weak in the knees from his kiss. I'm seriously going to melt into a puddle of goo. His hands are holding my face and the kiss intensifies. It's like we can't get enough of each other, like he is kissing in fear of losing me. I pull away and gasped for breath.

"We...should go," I gasp.

We drive in silence back to my house. He pulls up in front of my house, and we sit in the car for what seems like an eternity. So much is going through my mind. I'm in love with Edward Cullen and it's scaring me.

"You don't have to be scared of me," he says softly.

"I can't help it," I reply.

"Why are you scared of me but not Jacob Black?" he asks.

"That's different," I say softly.

"How is it different?" he asks.

"Because, he isn't a killer," I murmur.

"He is still dangerous."

Is he trying to argue with me?

"No more dangerous than you are," I mutter.

Edward leans toward me. "Look, Bella, I want you to trust me. I need you to trust me. I…need you," he whispers, his cool breath washing over my face. I look away from him and see Lucy sitting on the porch.

"I'll see you later," I say softly as I jump out of the car and walk up to the porch. I watch him speed off into the distance.

"Where have you been?" Lucy asks.

"Sorry, I left a note. I was with a friend," I say as I make my way into the house.

"What Friend I don't know him" She said as she followed me into the house.

"He's a friend from school. He came over to work on a project with me and, well, I hurt my hand." I raise my hurt hand to show her.

"That will teach you not to punch Jacob Black in the face again," she says with a smile.

I look at her curiously. How did she know I punched Jacob? Did he come back here after I left?

"How did you know that?" I ask.

"He called looking for you, and he told me what happened. That boy has it bad for you. It surprised me that you come pulling up here in a really nice Volvo with a guy I've never even met before. Bella, what's going on? Jacob was really upset."

I look at Lucy, trying to find the right words to say. I'm not sure if Jacob gave her all the details or left some out.

"What did Jacob tell you?" I ask.

"Well, he said you two got into a fight and you got mad and punched him. He is really upset. Tell me what happened Bella? You and Jacob are practically glued together. You never fight."

"It was nothing, just a stupid fight," I say softly. I know she has more questions. I can see it in her eyes.

"Does this guy that dropped you off have anything to do with the fight you and Jacob had?"

"Lucy, it's none of your business."

"Jacob was really concerned on the phone. He was freaking out when I told him you weren't home. So there has to be something else going on," she says, placing her hands on her hips.

"There isn't anything else going on. Can we leave it at that?" I say as I head upstairs to my room. I shut the door and am startled by a presence in my room.

"Jacob?"

"Hey," he says.

"What are you doing here?" I can see the pain in his eyes, so I look down. I hurt him and I hate the fact that I hurt him. Jake is the one thing in my life that makes sense. He has always been there for me and now, well, I feel like things have changed.

"I wanted to make sure you were okay," he says softly.

"Other than the hurt hand from you hard jaw, I'm great," I say remembering the words said to me in anger. I'm dead to him. Those words hurt. They stung me. Each and every word is like a continuous bee sting.

"Look, I'm sorry," he says, coming toward me.

I push him away. "I just want to forget it happened. Okay?" I say softly.

"I can't forget it happened. Bella, do you realize now things have changed?"

I know this. He doesn't have to point it out.

"I know."

"Bella," he starts to say as he takes in a deep breath.

I know something is wrong, I can see it in his eyes.

"Jake?"

"Has that bloodsucker been in your room?" he asks.

"No, why?"

"Someone's been in your room," he growls.

Someone was in my room? What? Wait. How? Was it a vampire?

Jacob is starting to get angsty. He paces back and fourth.

"Jacob, are you telling me someone was in my room? Someone as in...a vampire?" I ask.

"Yes. It's not a scent I recognize, but it's definetly a bloodsucker. Look, I'm not leaving you unprotected tonight. If one of his bloodsucking friends…"

I stopped him. "Jake," I say softly.

"This is serious, Bella! Real serious!"

*Edward*

Alice comes barging into my room. I know something is wrong. I can see it in her eyes. Her thoughts are jumbled and panicky. She looks at me with fear.

"Alice? What is it?" I ask.

"It's Bella," she says softly.