"Hey, I heard that!" Sam said trying to sound angry.
Nat, Maria, and I laughed as Steve shouted back a denial from the kitchen.
"You brought the beer so you're automatically beer bitch." Maria giggled.
"Language," I muttered as Steve walked in causing everyone but a lost looking Steve to laugh.
"How is your head by the way?" Nat asked.
"Fine, I think. Head injuries always heal slowly." I said giving her a soft smile.
"Is it safe for you to have alcohol with that?" Sam asked.
I shrugged," It should be fine I'm a lot further in the recovery process than a human would be."
"I wouldn't drink more than one though," Maria suggested.
"I hadn't planned on it," I informed her.
"Or we could just share one," Steve said.
"That's probably the safest option." Maria agreed.
I nodded my own agreement as we began to eat. Well, the others began to eat, I just picked at my slice laughing at what Nat said at my expense. Sam patted my shoulder gently giving me a grin.
"You're not eating much, Baby," Maria commented off-handedly.
"I don't have much of an appetite," I said.
"It's understandable." Nat offered, kicking Steve from her spot on the coffee table.
"Why?" Steve questioned.
"You deserved it." I laugh.
"For what?" He questioned again.
"We don't know yet," Sam said laughing.
"So how are Sophia and Lukas?" I asked causing Sam to sputter.
"They're doing good, Sophia found a job and one of the Agents a few doors down watches Lukas when her and I are at work." He said.
"Do you watch him for her often?" Steve asked.
"Yeah, he's a cool kid. He's really smart too." Sam laughed.
"Do you spend time with Sophia?" Nat asked.
"We hang out every Friday. She's coping well." He explained.
"That's good," I said poking a piece of sausage into Steve's mouth.
"You two are so cute it's disgusting," Nat said with a fake gag.
"Be nice. You're just sexually frustrated since Maria cut you off." Sam teased.
"Maria, why would you do that?" I asked.
"She made a very insensitive comment about you being under doctor's orders to not have sex," Maria explained simply. "Therefore she isn't allowed to have sex until you are."
"Good." I laughed.
Nat pouted.
"Nat, you'll survive," Sam said.
"No, I'm going to die." She whined.
"You'll be fine." Steve laughed.
I shook my head taking my first ever sip of beer. It was bitter and frothy but it wasn't horrible. It wasn't something I'd request to drink but I'd accept it if it were offered to me.
Soon the pizza was gone and we were watching an action film in the dark room. Sam sat in the recliner, Nat and Maria were curled up on the love seat, while Steve and I were sprawled on across the couch with a blanket over us. About half way through the movie I felt Steve's hand move from my chest to beneath the waist band of my track pants. He shushed me as he stroked me to life and continued to move his hand slowly. I bit my lip and bit back a frustrated groan. His hand was moving too slow to allow me to finish but it felt good. He held me still so I couldn't squirm too much as he moved his fingers to tease my entrance. He whispered praises in my ear as his fingers breached my walls. My body was begging for release but he was intentionally rubbing every spot but the one I wanted. One movie came to an end and the next began without anyone interrupting. His other moved up my body to trace my bottom lip. I moved just slightly and bit his finger, hard. He hissed, pulling his hands away from me. I had to hold back the whine that almost escaped me.
"No biting." He snapped in my ear.
I gave a curt nod too afraid to move too much. I glanced around to see everyone else watching the movie, completely ignorant to Steve toying with my body. He continued what he was doing until finally the second movie came to an end.
Once everyone left we cleaned up and went to bed. Steve was grinning but I was pouting, feeling unsatisfied and frustrated.
"Aw, don't pout, I'll take care of it after you're healed." He teased.
"She said no sex. Nothing about me getting off." I whined.
"Be a good boy and it'll be worth it." He promised.
I pouted again but quickly forgot about the mistreatment when he pulled me into a deep kiss. I moaned as his hands moved under my shirt and across my body. I stretched my spine feeling his touch relaxing my muscles. His fingers ran over my ribs before he pulled away frowning.
"No more missions for a while Jay, you're losing too much weight." He said sternly.
"I'm sorry," I said feeling an incomprehensible fear shoot through me.
"Don't apologize, it's not your fault. We just need to get your diet fixed and you'll be fine, okay?" He said.
I nodded still feeling the panic rising.
"What's wrong, talk to me." He said rubbing my back.
"I don't know," I said, my breathing quick and unsteady.
"Take deep breaths. In through your nose and out through your mouth. That's it. Just focus on me. Good boy." He walked me through it.
"What is this?" I asked as I started to calm down.
"You're having a panic attack. You're going to get through it. I'll call Dr. Allen to ask her about it when your breathing is a bit more even." He reassured me.
"No, don't bother her it's late. You can call her in the morning." I reasoned still breathing the way he'd told me to.
"Are you sure?" He asked.
"Yeah, it's fine. I'm calming down." I said grabbing his hand to stroke the knuckles with my thumb.
"Alright, I'll call her in the morning." He said softly.
"Steve?" I questioned quietly.
"Yeah?" He replied.
"What would you have done if I hadn't walked away from that wreck?" I couldn't help but be curious.
"The same thing I was going to do when you wouldn't answer me. I would have killed Bucky." He said somberly.
"I'm not worth it. You wouldn't have been able to live with yourself. Bucky isn't just some Hydra agent, he's your best friend." I reasoned.
"No, but I couldn't think straight while you were sitting there unresponsive." He admitted.
"I'm glad you made sure I was still breathing first." I laughed. " I'm tired can we go to sleep now?"
"Yeah, let's do that." He said.
I didn't sleep well, I wasn't having nightmares but I did wake up every hour or so and couldn't reach a deep sleep no matter how hard I tried. When Steve got up he told me to try to sleep a bit longer and if I needed anything to have Jarvis call him. I sighed curling up on his side of the bed and dozed off once again. I was woken up sometime later to Steve nudging my ribs. I groaned and rolled over to look at him. He was giving me a bright smile as he held out a plate of waffles and sausage. I couldn't help but smile back at him.
"Good morning." He said.
"Morning. So you can cook?" I laughed.
"No, Jarvis walked me through it." He responded sheepishly. "Oh, I did call Dr. Allen this morning. She said that emotional imbalances are normal but if you're still showing signs of anxiety or depression in a few weeks we should go see her."
I nodded as I picked at breakfast.
"Still no appetite or is it that bad?" He asked.
"No, it's really good, just not hungry," I reassured him as I tried to eat as much as my stomach could handle.
"Maybe I should feed you lighter foods until you heal." He thought out loud.
"I don't think it'll make a difference," I told him honestly.
Later we were sitting by the lake breathing in the chilly air. We hadn't said much since taking our seats but it was nice. I was leaning my back against him and his hand was rubbing circles into my stomach. I sighed contently.
"I love you." He said breaking the silence.
"I know," I whispered.
I yelped as his hand moved down my pants causing my body to stir in interest. He chuckled as his hand pushed my cheeks apart and a finger entered me. I groaned as he did the same thing as the previous night, denying me any release.
"You're doing so well taking this in stride." He commented.
I moaned as he added a second finger and thrust his fingers faster.
"Such a good boy." He said kissing my temple.
I bit my lip whining when he pulled his fingers out.
"You're killing me." I bit out.
"Just be good until your week is up." He said smirking.
"You're being mean." I pouted.
"You won't think so when it's all over. It'll be worth it, I promise." He told me quietly.
"I'm not sure it'll be worth this torture," I whined.
And that's how the days went until I went to see Dr. Allen. I would be relaxing and Steve would start and stop leaving me aching and wanting and unsatisfied. Each day I grew more and more frustrated but Steve was unrelenting, not that I'd actually told him to stop. If I had he would have.