Author's Notes:

I don't know.

Enjoy!

MIRACULOUS LADYBUG: "KITTY LITTER"

by Mythril Moth

Word Vomit

"MY PUSSY!" Marinette blurted out. Everyone within earshot froze in their tracks, slowly turning to stare at her. Alya facepalmed.

Adrien stood before Marinette, blinking blankly. "Uh...huh?"

Marinette seemed to be trying to figure out exactly what she'd just said. Her eyes darted all over the place. Her hands made odd, spastic motions. She opened her mouth...

"It fell out!" she said. Alya winced, pinching the bridge of her nose.

Adrien blinked slowly. "Uh. Wow. That, umm...sucks." He patted Marinette on the shoulder. "Feel better! I gotta go. Fencing."

As Adrien headed off to practice, Alya walked up to Marinette, grabbed her by the upper arm, and dragged her out of what was rapidly becoming a viral video in the making. "Really, girl?" Alya asked dryly.

"What...what did I say this time?" Marinette asked, her voice full of dread.

Alya sighed. "How do you not even know what words come out of your own mouth?"

"I don't know!" Marinette cried, throwing up her hands. "It's like my brain and my mouth just suddenly stop...y'know...working together!"

Alya shook her head. "Well, since it's gonna be all over the Internet in about two minutes, you might as well know you just informed Adrien that your pussy fell out."

Marinette froze in her tracks, face pale and eyes wide. "I said WHAT?!"

"Hey, look on the bright side," Alya said with a cheeky grin. "Maybe he'll try to find it for you!"

Marinette clobbered Alya over the head with her backpack. "That's! NOT! FUNNY!"

Adrien rubbed his shoulder as he toweled off, then pulled his shirt on. "Agh, I overextended," he complained.

Plagg's head popped up out of his bag. "Did you get lost in thought again, hmm?" He gave Adrien a sly grin. "Thinking about what Marinette said?"

Adrien's face dusted pink. "Don't tease, Plagg," he said. "Her condition is embarrassing enough without people making fun of her for it."

Plagg blinked. "Condition?"

Adrien stretched, twisting his back to work out a kinked muscle. "I figured it out a while ago," he said. "I still need to do some research on it because it doesn't seem like her symptoms are consistent or match up, but Marinette has some form of aphasia. I just know it."

Plagg tilted his head. "Aphasia? That thing where you get brain damage and suddenly you can't talk right?"

"Yeah," Adrien said. "Although I think she has some kind of rare panic-induced aphasia. Like...she's fine most of the time, but then every so often she just glitches out, you know?" He shook his head. "I feel bad for her, especially since she's so awesome and cool."

Plagg grunted. "There might be a simpler explanation for it, you know," he said.

"Nah, it's the only thing that makes sense..."

"A skunk!" Marinette said, a rictus grin on her face, her eyes wide and unblinking. "And, umm...armpit! Old...underwear?" Shaking her head, she turned and jogged away from Adrien, flailing and tripping twice.

Adrien smiled wanly, eyes warm and full of concern. "It's okay, Marinette," he said. "I understand—"

"DUDE!" Nino called from behind him. Adrien turned to see Nino eyeing him with disgust, pinching his nose closed and waving a hand in front of his face. "What the hell's that STANK? Have you been rolling around in dead possums or something?"

Adrien blinked. "Huh? What are you talking about?"

"Oh, dude, how can you not smell that?" Nino asked. "Whatever. Sit in the back today, willya? Damn, dude." He headed up to the school.

Frowning, Adrien gave himself a sniff...and doubled over, retching. "What the—" He peeked into his shirt, and found Plagg curled up around a thick, slimy wad of El Plaggo.

Plagg blinked innocently up at him. "What?"

Miraculous Ladybug is the intellectual property of Zagtoon, Method Animation, Toei Animation, and Thomas ASTRUC. This intellectual property is used without permission with no intent to profit from said use. The unique content contained on this page is the property of Mythril Moth, and redistribution of this content without express permission is strongly discouraged.