Doubt

"Hey, where were you?" AJ asked later on as Punk got home, "Amelia was bummed that her homework buddy wasn't here." She said as Punk smiled.

"Yeah, sorry I got caught up." Punk nodded to her, "She in bed?"

"Yeah, I just put her down. Dean has gone out with some friends." She told him as he took his jacket off and nodded, "I've actually been watching TV programs, can you believe it?" She asked him as he chuckled.

"Why is that a big deal?" Punk chuckled, sitting down beside her on the couch.

"I never had the time. I was so busy doing everything and anything on my own that… I never had time to sit down with a coffee and relax for an hour." She admitted honestly, "I've actually saw a house I really like." She nodded.

"Yeah?" Punk smiled.

"Yeah, it's five minutes away." AJ nodded, "It's great. Three bedroom. Really pretty garden-"

"That's the most important thing. The garden." Punk teased as she nudged him.

"Hey, it's nice for Amelia in the Summer." AJ defended, "And Spike of course." She nodded over to the lazy dog lying in front of the fire on his bed.

"You gonna put in an offer?" He asked her as she nodded.

"I already have actually." AJ smiled, "I'm just waiting on my realtor calling me back." She nodded, "Seems promising. Then I can move all my shit out from my old house and it can… it can really be a new beginning." She nodded to herself.

"As long as you're happy." Punk smiled.

"I am. I really am." AJ nodded, "I'm putting myself first and I'm doing things for me." She said as he smiled.

"Good. The way it should be." Punk nodded.

"And I'm really glad that… maybe you and I can… maybe start something new too." She nodded, running her finger up his chest and turning into him as he smiled.

"Yeah, me too." Punk smiled, watching as she leaned up to kiss him, "Wait." Punk stopped as she looked at him, "I gotta… I need to talk to you first." He said. He knew it was wrong for him to keep hiding Lily from her. He didn't want it to look like he was ashamed, because he wasn't, he was just worried of how she'd look at the situation, how she'd react to him not being as present in her life, but he wouldn't keep it from her any longer.

"What is it?" AJ asked a little worriedly, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong." Punk shook his head, "I uh… well I haven't been completely honest with you." He admitted, sitting up a little as AJ looked at him, "I didn't keep it from you because I didn't want you to know or anything like that, I just… I see how it looks and I didn't want you to think of me in a certain way." He said.

"Phil, what's going on?" AJ asked, starting to worry.

"I have another daughter." Punk nodded as AJ looked across at him with widening eyes, "With my ex." He said, "We had her just as we were separating. Wasn't particularly great. She's turning four this week. Her mom hasn't been the greatest throughout it all. I've been threatened with custody trials and restraining orders. I've barely got to see her over the past few years." Punk said as AJ frowned, "She lets me come and go but… I'm not really in her life." He shook his head.

"Phil, why did you never say?" AJ shook her head.

"Because I see how it looks." Punk nodded, "Like I don't care-"

"No, it looks like your ex has been unfair to you." AJ said, "What's her name?" She placed her hand on his arm as he turned to her.

"Lily." Punk nodded.

"That's sweet." AJ smiled, "And she's turning four this week?"

"Yeah, uh… day before Rey's birthday." Punk nodded, "So every year for the past couple I've sat celebrating my daughter's birthdays… on my own." He said, "One doesn't even know me and is pretty much all grown up and the other is forgetting about me." He said as AJ sighed.

"Have you talked to your ex?" AJ asked him, "What she's doing isn't fair. Maybe… maybe a custody hearing would be good, because then you could get fair rules that allows you to see her-"

"I would never win that custody trial, trust me." Punk nodded, "I have a criminal record, a conviction-"

"A conviction?" AJ asked with horror, "When?"

"It's a long story." Punk shook his head, "That's why she always threatened me with it. If it ever went to court I'd never see her again." He said, "But she seems to be giving me a chance, even though I never did anything wrong." He said, "That's where I was earlier. I find it really strange that she has this change of mind as soon as she sees me with you but… neither here nor there… I'm just interested in Lily and being there for her."

"So she's letting you see her?" AJ asked.

"Yeah, apparently but… it could all change. I never know how to read Chrissy." He admitted honestly.

"She doesn't have a right to do that. To keep her from you." AJ shook her head, saddened by what he was saying and what he was going through. She couldn't imagine being kept from Amelia, and she wasn't even mad that he hadn't told her.

"I know that but… I couldn't risk losing her forever so I… I did what she said." Punk nodded.

"I'm so sorry." AJ sighed, rubbing his arm softly and shuffling closer to him, "But… you know it's a good thing that she's considering letting you see her. Even if it's to do with me or whatever it is you think… just do whatever you can for Lily, so you can see her, because that's the important thing, right?" She nodded.

"Yeah, it's all that matters. Chrissy knows that." Punk said.

"Then focus on that." AJ nodded, "Are you getting to see her for her birthday?" She asked him.

"I'm gonna take her out after. I would never be invited to her party with Chrissy's parents there." Punk rolled his eyes, "I'll see her a few days after." He nodded.

"Well that's good." AJ nodded, "You should never have hesitated to tell me. What did you think I was gonna do?" She wondered.

"I just thought you'd think I was a dead beat dad or… I just wasn't interested-"

"I don't think that. I think your ex seems like a bitch and what she's doing, using your daughter like that against you… it's not cool." AJ shook her head, "Clearly this has nothing to do with you on your end." She said.

"I never even told Bob." Punk shook his head, "We'd split up when she found out she was pregnant. I… I refused to get back together just because we were having a baby. I was trying to do the right thing. We agreed to co-parent. I was there when she was born and there for her the first few weeks and then it… it started to get messy." He nodded.

"We all have failed relationships." AJ nodded, "I get it, I mean look what I'm going through." She said, "It sucks and it's horrible but… you just gotta lean on the people around you. Lily is… still really young so you have the time now to be present." She said.

"I find it easier talking with Rey than I do with Lily." Punk admitted honestly, "Is that weird?"

"Rey's an adult, we can talk to her casually. Younger kids are harder to entertain but… you… you're so good with Amelia." AJ shook her head. She didn't know why he sounded so doubtful of himself. He was so great with Amelia and so hands on, she couldn't imagine him being any different.

"I just feel like I suck." Punk nodded, "As a dad."

"You don't." AJ shook her head, "You've not even been given the chance with Lily, and you haven't really got the chance with Rey either." She said honestly, "There's plenty of time and I'll… I'll help you with anything. Maybe Amelia and Lily could have a play date." She suggested with a smile as Punk turned to her and smiled.

"Thank you." Punk nodded. He was surprised at how encouraging she was but then he remembered all the reasons why he loved her, why she was his best friend and his everything for so long. She always knew the right things to say, no matter what the situation was.

"Rey will freak out when she realises she's got another sister." AJ laughed a little, "She's gonna love it."

"Yeah, I bet." Punk nodded, "You don't think I'm a terrible father?" Punk asked her.

"Phil." AJ tutted, "Of course I don't. I don't think you've been given the chance. I mean… no matter what went on with me and Tom, I would never stop him seeing Amelia. What Chrissy has been doing is wrong, it's unfair and she can't use Lily to get to you like that." She said as Punk nodded.

"Yeah, I know." Punk said, "I don't know whether to buy her sincere act right now." He admitted.

"Do what you have to for Lily. Forget about Chrissy." AJ shook her head. To her, it sounded like his ex was a bitch the way she was behaving.

"Yeah, I'm gonna." Punk nodded. She was giving him the confidence and encouragement he needed.

"You're not a terrible father." AJ nodded, "You've been more of a father to Amelia than Tom has her whole life, and I'm not just saying that." She said, "Lily and Rey are really lucky to have you." She said as he smiled.

"Thank you." Punk nodded as she smiled, cupping the back of his head and playing with the hair at the bottom as he smiled, leaning forward and kissing her softly. It felt like a life time since he was able to seek comfort in someone and actually feel comfortable doing so.

AJ deepened the kiss, climbing over him and cupping his cheeks as he stood up off the couch with her as she smiled against his mouth.

"Dean will kill you." AJ mouthed against his lips which he the moved down to her neck, carrying her out of the living room and heading for Dean's bedroom as Amelia was asleep in his.

"He'll never know." Punk smiled, pressing his lips back against hers as he walked into the bedroom and closed the door over with his foot.