You should never be alone!

Chapter 16

A/N: Sorry it's been a while but I don't leave things unfinished. I plan to focus on this more to finish it and then focus on my other fic for a bit before thinking of starting anything new. I hope you enjoy and please review.

She felt bad for them. Their resources were stretched enough as it was without her being a nuisance to them all. What's worse is that she wasn't exactly comfortable. She didn't blame them though; if she had never left the base to do her petty work she never would have been taken.

Bella felt stupid. She had felt off about something for a while and as soon as she saw that car that she always felt was watching her she should have run. The whole kidnapping experience had shaken her. The red head was just thankful that someone was watching out for her. She had to wonder if he wasn't in love with her would he have saved her. Would he have even thought about where she might be to only discover she was in danger? Isabella had seen it with the other autobots; even though they loved their charges there wasn't as much worry as there was in Smokescreens case.

Though she was no longer trapped inside her own mind, she was still not completely herself. Bella had gone with Smokescreen back to the base and Optimus and Ratchet had insisted that Jack's mother look her over. Reluctantly she agreed and sat still as the older woman checked her vitals; she went right into her nurse mind. The only thing that didn't make her go over the edge from all this unwanted attention was Smokescreen. The rookie remained behind her as she sat on the couch and she occasionally felt his digit stroke the top of her head and run down her back in a soothing way. She couldn't help the feelings that were building up inside of her that made her feel insignificant. The autobots weren't the ones that hurt her and threatened her but she still felt wary around them which was all a result of her kidnapping. Smokescreen being the only one that she was comfortable with being around. When Jack's mother was done she heard her report to the worried bots that red head was fine physically but psychologically it would take time to recover. Much to what Bella expected.

She knew how this worked, no matter how hard she would try it would take time for her to get back to normal. She may not be stuck in her head anymore but she was still uneasy and untrusting of people. She was lucky to be with the autobots though – they were patient and understanding. Optimus being the one to tell them to give her some space and try to keep quiet. That was before he flew off someplace leaving Ultra Magnus in command. Since then the second in command had ordered the autobots to scout out areas for possible decepticon activity and predacon bones. He made sure to inform them to follow protocol to the letter and return and write up their reports before moving on to the next sector.

She hated that Smokescreen had to leave her to go scouting out sectors but there was nothing for her to do and she much rather stay at the base now that go out with him given that there was a chance of running into more decepticons. She'd prefer to stay out of more trouble but made sure that Smokescreen said a proper goodbye before leaving for his sector.

She was then left with Jack on the couch. The raven haired boy was waiting for his mother to be done so that they could go home themselves. Miko and Raf were already at home so she didn't have to worry about three teenagers rampaging her with questions that would only put her on edge even more. She was lucky that it was just Jack around knowing that he was the eldest and the more mature of the teens; he would respect her much needed space particularly given that they had known each other longer. But he did care for her; much like an older sibling. "Are you sure you're okay, Bella?" he voice showed her just how concerned she was.

The red head kept her train of thought on the teenage boy hoping that it would calm her nerves. She was mostly waiting for Smokescreen so that he could make her feel better and put a proper smile on her face. The intensity of the emotions she was building up was making her tired and she couldn't wait for her rookie to return so that she could rest properly. "Honestly Jack, I feel worse for the fact that I'm nervous around the bots but I'll be better when Smoke comes back"

He could understand and didn't want to bother her further with it. But there was something else that was on his mind that he was sure she wouldn't like that he just had to ask. "Bella, how do you both…" he didn't know quite how to put it "how does a relationship work with you and Smokescreen?"

The red heads cheeks flushed red at the thought of Jack asking about her sex life. She could see how he was having difficulty wording it properly but she did feel the need to walk away at that moment. It embarrassed her and considering that her rookie hadn't told anyone that he possessed a holoform she wasn't completely sure if she should tell about it. She also worried what they all might think. It would reveal that things between Smokescreen and herself were more intimate that the others may have realised which could present a problem.

It was then at that moment that the ground bridge opened and the autobots walked through. Her eyes automatically focussing on the blue autobot that she wanted to see. She noticed that his optics searched for her immediately and when they found her he gave her one of his cheeky grins which made her heart warm. Though she wanted to be with him she sighed watching him walk away with the others towards the main console. "This is for your ears only" Bella made her voice quiet but firm. She as putting her trust into the teenage boy and knew that if Miko found out then so would everyone else and that would be too much of an embarrassment. Jack nodded understanding and remained silent as he waited to hear. "Smoke has this technology called a holoform, it's a holographic projection of Smokescreen in an organic body". She could tell that he might not completely understand so she tried to think of a less complicated way of saying it to him. "It's a rare programming that allows Smokescreen to become human"

Jack was a little shocked at the news. To hear that cybertronians had that kind of technology even after everything else that they have that is still so remarkable. He did wonder why he had never seen the autobots use the holoforms. It had him really question how much he knew them. "So how come Arcee hasn't told us about these holoforms?"

Bella glanced over her shoulder to the bots. She noticed Ultra Magnus moving over to them as they were taking turns in typing on the console. The second in commands voice being quite authoritive and loud for both Bella and Jack to hear. "Beat hunters, may I ask why you are no currently scouting grid-305 for predacon bones"

The autobots turned to him and we stood as straight as they could knowing how firm Ultra Magnus can be. Arcee was the first to reply "Because we've just returned from surveying grids-301 to 304"

Bulkhead cleared his vents and chose to speak too, hoping the blue mech wouldn't be offended by Arcee's bland voice "to log our field reports per your protocol, Commander Magnus Sir" It was then that Wheeljack came into the hanger covered in a strange green liquid.

The red head chose to ignore the current conversations going on to finally answer Jack's question "I guess it was never relevant" she noticed the raven haired boys disappointed face "Smoke told me that when the war started that the Cybertronians deleted the holoform programming – that's why it's rare now. He said that he kept his hoping to visit an organic planet. You'll probably find that the autobots don't have holoforms so there was no reason for you to know about them"

Jack nodded in understanding "I've seen Arcee use come kind of projection before though. She does it when she comes to pick me up so she doesn't draw attention to herself with the whole motorcycle driving itself"

"Smokescreen also told me about holoscreens. They sort of similar but the main difference is that the screens aren't real; can't be touched and don't move" she reached out and put her hand on his shoulder for a little comfort. The two of them were then distracted as Optimus returned from scouting also and all the autobots except for Magnus were quick to welcome the leader back.

It was clear to Bella that Ultra Magnus was finding it difficult to adjust to how the war ran on Earth. She didn't even want to know how it was on Cybertron but she could imagine that it was probably nothing like this. The autobots moved inside more and Optimus was speaking with them about his concerns. The others slowly went back to filling in their field reports again. That was when she decided that she needed fresh air and the afternoon sun on her. She hoped that going outside would also help to calm her. As she decended the stairs and moved to the exit she saw Ultra Magnus by the hanger doors peering outside and felt sympathy towards him.

"It might not be what you're used to but does it not remind you of what you are fighting for?" she spoke softly and noticed that she had got the second in commands attention when he looked down at her. She did worry a little that he would have a go at her for not calling him 'sir' but in all fairness she wasn't fighting in the war. She was a civilian and she had the best intentions.

To her luck Magnus wasn't like that at all. "It does. But it does remind me that nowhere is safe from the decepticons and that the war stretches further than we realise" his optics moved from focussing on then back outside. The two watching as soldiers were training and jogging past.

She gave him a small smile. Of course there was no way she could know how he was truly feeling. "I'm sorry for what you must have gone through since it all began; it's not something any human can truly understand but I do know that your contributions to the team are well appreciated"

He was about to say something further to her when Optimus approached "Ultra Magnus" the leader noticing that the red head was there as well. She smiled and knew to leave, this wasn't any of her business. She chose to move outside quickly to avoid hearing whatever Optimus wanted to discuss with Magnus.

She moved to a small wall and perched herself on it. Taking the time to relax herself she shut her eyes and concentrated on her breathing. She could already feel her heart going into a steady rhythm as she listened to her surroundings. It was the typical army base noises that she heard; the heavy breathing of the training soldiers and the rumbling of nearby machinery. The warmth of the sun on her skin though made her feel more comfortable and she found entertainment in the knowledge that the some of the passing soldiers couldn't help but sneak a quick peak inside the hanger while others were not so bothered that there were aliens within a few metres of them.

"So what's a beautiful girl like you doing in a place like this" she smiled hearing her rookie's voice behind her. She didn't make a move to face him though – this was his playful side and she could tell from his voice that he was using his holoform. His real self still inside the hangar and probably awaiting orders.

She decided to play along "I don't know really. I thought I was here for this guy that I'm head over heels for but there are some really good looking and young soldiers on this base too…"

"Woah" she opened her eyes as soon as she felt his hands on her and as soon as he stepped in front of her she gave him a playful smirk "now that hurt, Bells"

"So does watching you go through that ground bridge while I'm sat in my lazy ass doing nothing but you don't see me complaining" she shrugged her shoulders and saw the hint of guilt on his face. He was going to reply to her but she didn't let him. Pushing herself off the wall she closed the distance between then and pushed her lips onto his. Smokescreen welcomed her touch. Since she became trapped in her own mind he had missed her normal self. He missed the feeling of her right by him. Then again since she got better he missed it being just the two of them. Pulling away from the kiss she whispered to him "It's okay. I don't want to go home anyway without you and what you're doing is more important than anything I can come up with"

He instantly cupped her face with his hands and stroked her cheeks "nothing is more important to me than you, Bells"

"I know that. Just like I know where priorities are"

The two smiled at each other as they loved just being in the company of the other. But the moment ended just as it began when Smokescreens expression went blank and she could tell he was focussing on his true self. She glanced over her shoulder wondering what was going on in the hangar now but her attention was drawn to the rookie in front of her when she heard him sigh. "Sorry Bells, looks like there's exposed energon that needs checking out" he gave her an apologetic look.

"It's okay Smoke. I know how low your energon supply is" her voice was soft and calm which made his cheeks flush. She leant in and quickly pecked his lips to which Smokescreen didn't want to let her go. He wanted more "Now got get em" he nodded and the holoform fizzled out leaving Bella alone again. She didn't see a point in returning inside the hangar knowing that they'd all be gone by the time she got in there. So the red head opted for stretching her legs and walking around the hangar for a little bit of exercise. She did want to explore the base a bit more but she remembered Fowler telling them that it was restricted unless she was with an autobot. Like knowing about transforming aliens wasn't enough.

Bella took her time walking around the perimeter of the hangar. The soldiers around her didn't pay attention to her as they had their own agenda. But she couldn't help but ponder over things. She hated watching Smokescreen leave for a mission; it reminded her that there was always a chance that he wouldn't return. That risk applied to all the autobots and even the human soldiers that served as well on Earth. It made her recognise that all she really had was the rookie. He had befriended her and stayed by her and now that same young autobot was who she loved the most. If he didn't come back Bella didn't know what she would do. It hurt her heart to think of such things so she tried to put it out of her head.

The only other thing that she thought about though was the part she played in this war. She was someone for Smokescreen to come back to. Someone he could talk to whenever he wanted and make him happy. Was that enough? As much as people may argue that it is because it give moral support and it gives him another reason to fight she didn't feel right. He was risking his spark every day and she was doing nothing. This was her planet that was at stake. Her life and the life of the people around her. She couldn't just sit and wait for Smokescreen to come back to her all the time; she needed to help.

By then Bella hadn't even realised that she had walked the perimeter of the hangar twice and as she was about to start again she saw Jack waiting for her at the entrance to the building. "Got your daily exercise yet" he smiled to her.

"No, more like tortured myself with my thoughts" she moved to stand by him and glanced inside a moment seeing only Ratchet inside working on a console for the synthetic energon.

"What's on your mind?"

She wondered if telling him would help. It couldn't hurt but he might think that perhaps she was going mad. Taking in a deep breath she chose to let him in. "I wouldn't go back to how I was before; not knowing the autobots. Meeting Smokescreen and almost being killed was the best day ever even if it was scary but I can't help but fear that it could go back to that in the blink of an eye". Jack tilted his head to the side not understanding where she was going with this "I have to watch Smokescreen and the others walk through that ground bridge and wait until they come back, not actually knowing if they will. It is crazy that Miko always wanted to go with them and put herself in danger but as much as we try to stop her and tell her it's wrong I can't help but think that maybe she's right"

Jack shook his head trying to be on the same page as her "Are you crazy?! Miko just wants to see zombies and snap photos on her phone of the autobots fighting. Only when Bulkhead almost died did she recognise that this is a war that we are in. Going through that bridge means being put into danger and being a burden to the autobots…we got trapped in the shadow zone because of it"

"Jack, I don't think I can watch them walk through that portal anymore while I'm sat here watching the daily news or watching Raf scrub pictures of the bots online for cat pictures! It hurts too much and if I'm the one putting myself out there then that's my problem" she could see that Jack was about to talk some sense into her but she wouldn't let him. The teens were young and Miko being Miko would mainly see the fun in it but she was more experienced and perhaps a bit more level headed. "It might seem like we're insignificant around them but we're not. Just because our technology isn't that advanced that doesn't mean we are useless. You try and talk about modern day things with the autobots and they won't understand some of it because it is different, because we are unique in our own way. We can help…Did it not cross anyone's mind that maybe this war needs a tipping point – us"

The raven haired teen didn't say anything. Bella did feel a little bad that she was more or less shouting her frustrations at him but it was the truth and he did want to know what was bothering her. "Don't tell me that you feel like helping them by sitting here. Don't tell me that you don't feel like you could be doing more for them"

She didn't expect an answer from him and she didn't get one so she left him to think as she moved back inside. She eyed Ratchet struggling to complete the synthetic energon formula which very little technology to help him. Again she felt bad for him and the rest of the team. She moved back to the sofa and sat down waiting for the team to return and allowing herself to ponder the future.