Chapter 9 - Maybe

"What are you doing here Roman?" Mackenzie asked as she padded barefoot across the plush carpet of Robert's office as she was putting up the law books he'd gotten out of the shelves behind his desk. "The law office is closed this late at night and everything should be locked up tighter then a drum." She pointed out.

Roman stood there with a black hoodie under a black leather jacket, jeans, sneakers and a white t-shirt, his hair was pulled back into a tight bun at the nape of his neck. He hadn't seen her in weeks and she was still the most beautiful woman he'd ever laid eyes on. "I uh – I don't know."

Mackenzie turned around as her deep blue eyes looked at the man she could not quite stop loving. "Oh sure you do. You don't make a separate trip to Chicago in January because it's all nice and sunny here. This is probably the worst time to do a vacation in this city and you've always got an answer for questions. So try again."

Yup he deserved that snarky response.

Roman sighed heavily. "I needed to come and talk to you." He moved around the office as he watched her continue to put books away as if he weren't standing there.

"What could you possible need to talk to me about?" Mackenzie asked. "I'm pretty sure the last three times I've seen you; you said everything that needed to be said…and then some."

"Look, I know the last couple of times I came to see you my temper was out of control and I'm sorry about that. It's not like I can just snap my fingers and accept everything that was said between us. You know my stubborn side tends to over step my rational side. And yes I know I was an asshole to you the second time I showed up at your apartment unannounced, but I'm trying Kenzie. I swear I'm trying." Roman stated. He knew groveling was definitely going to help but first he wanted to try and reason with her; even though he could already tell her snarky side was waging a war with her sweet side.

"You're trying?" She asked more than stated. "You came to MY apartment and asked me to explain it…TWICE. I did exactly what you asked me to do and then what did you do? You called me a selfish bitch than you go see Dain and get the 'real' story – like I ever lied to you about what happened and suddenly everything is just supposed to be hunky dory between us and I'm just supposed to forget the hateful words you spewed out of your mouth?"

"Do I have to beg?" Roman asked. "Because I'm damn good at begging."

Mackenzie scoffed. "I wouldn't know you never begged me for anything."

Roman sighed heavily once more as he shed his leather jackets and hoodie as he sat down in a chair. "So let me ask you a serious question; what did you see in me Kenzie? I mean there had to be something you saw in me to be interested enough in me to let me get close to you and then…well you know what happened after that."

"You had a nice behind."

She shrugged as she began putting the files back together and filing them in the cabinet next to the shelves.

Roman couldn't stop the smirk from graving his lips. Now she was being cheeky. This was shades of the playful Mackenzie from when they started dating. She had the best playful side of any woman he had ever dated and it had made him love her more. "What do you mean had? Did I suddenly lose it?" Roman stood up as he looked over his shoulder. If she could be playful so could he.

It was a definite step in the right direction.

Mackenzie's perfectly shaped right eyebrow raised. "I haven't really seen it in 2 ½ years so I couldn't tell you." That was an honest answer.

Roman turned around so she could see his jean covered backside. "Well?" He looked over his shoulder again. "Did I lose it?"

Mackenzie shrugged once more. "Nah, it's still nice."

Roman cleared his throat as he turned back around so he could face her. He walked over and leaned against the front of the desk. His dark brown eyes drank in the curves of her body as he watched her grab another book and stood on her tip toes to push it into place. "It's nice to know you still have that hour glass figure that I couldn't get enough of." His eyes zeroed in on her shapely ass and those long legs sticking out of the end of her skirt. Naturally she would have to be barefoot.

Mackenzie could feel Roman's eyes burning a path down her body. It was nice to feel desired again. It had been so long since she felt the touch of a man she was pretty sure she didn't even know how to be intimate anymore. Deep blue eyes blinked as she turned around not expecting Roman to be closer to her with only Robert's desk separating them. "I couldn't do much in New Mexico except work and go to the gym so that's what I did with my days for 2 ½ years."

Roman stood up straight as he crossed his arms over his chest as he continued to watch her clean up the desk. He didn't think one desk could be so cluttered but he guessed a lawyer's desk could really pack on the crap. "So are you seeing anyone right now?"

"Maybe."

That answer alone got Roman's insides riled up. "Did you date while you were in New Mexico?"

"Maybe."

Mackenzie watched as Roman's eyebrows dropped to the bridge of his nose; he was getting annoyed with her maybe answers and wanted the truth, but she knew how to tease him.

"Are you going to give me a straight answer?" Roman asked.

Mackenzie turned around and crossed her arms over her chest mimicking Roman's posture. "I don't know if that is any of your business Roman. I wasn't with you, so why would you need to know? I mean I'm not standing here asking you about your bachelor status now am I." She stated pointedly.

"I'm just asking questions here." Roman said in an annoyed tone.

"Well I'm not standing here asking you how many times you dipped your wick so why are you asking me. Besides what guarantee do I have that you won't go running to Dain and ask him for the 'real' answer?" She jabbed,

Roman scrubbed a hand down his face. He knew eventually she was going to bring up the fact that he went to Dain. It was the stupidest move he'd made so far in his life and now it was going to come back to bite him on the ass when it was time to get his girl back. Roman put both of his hands on the desk as he leaned over so they could be eye to eye across the desk. "Look, I know I screwed up by going to Dain and I could make a thousand excuses as to why I went but I only went because I needed a piece of mind. I needed to know why and how and what led to you doing what you did without me and without our friends. I just needed to hear it from a different perspective. I didn't think you were lying to me. I didn't know what to think. I was lost and angry and confused."

"So why all the dating questions all of a sudden?" Kenzie asked curiously.

"So I know whose God damn head I have to knock off, if I ever run into them in New Mexico." Roman growled.

Mackenzie jumped slightly at the growl that emanated in Roman's chest. There he was. Her big protector he was finally coming back into the light. She loved it when he went all caveman on her. She couldn't help the soft giggle that escaped her lips as she put a hand over her mouth. She had been waiting to see this version of Roman. His dominant side was starting to show and she loved it when it came out to play.

Roman's ears perked up when he heard the giggle. His tongue came out and licked his top lip as his bottom lip rolled under his tongue wetting it as well. His dark brown eyes locked with her deep blue. "Are you screwing with me?" He asked in his Dom voice.

Mackenzie inhaled as she closed her eyes and opened them as she slowly exhaled. There was always something about his Dominant voice that just woke up her body and did wonderful things to her. She felt her panties dampen instantly.

She folded her arms over her chest once more and kicked her hip to the side.

"Maybe."

She narrowed her eyes and pursed her lips together almost daring him to do something about it in her bosses office.

Roman growled slightly. "Am I only going to get maybe's out of you tonight?"

"Maybe."

Roman's dark eyes narrowed at the beauty across the desk from him. "Is maybe the only word you know right now?"

"Maybe."

"You're really not going to make this easy for me are you?" Roman asked.

"Maybe…Maybe not - but why should I?" She asked honestly.

"Because we both know how much we miss each other; how much we need each other right now." Roman would plead his case until the very end.

Mackenzie knew he had a point but she wasn't sure she was ready to admit any of that to him. She saw another law book sitting on the floor next to the desk as she leaned over and grabbed it before turning to the booked case.

"Maybe."

Roman watched as she yet again stood on her tip toes as she struggled to push the book into its rightful place on the shelf. He couldn't imagine there were so many books on the law in Chicago let alone the state of Illinois. Again with the maybe; he'd had just about enough of that word. He walked around the end of the desk and stepped up behind her; he stretched above her head and helped her push the book in place.

Mackenzie sunk back down to the flat of her bare feet as she turned and was face to chest with Roman. She felt Roman's hands go out as his long fingers wrapped around her shoulders. She could feel her insides jittering from standing so close to Roman once again. If only she could just be honest and tell him how much she missed him.

Roman's dark brown eyes sought out her blues when he noticed she wasn't looking up at him. "My eyes are up here beautiful." He stated low in his Dom voice.

Mackenzie shook her head negatively. "Please don't Roman."

Roman frowned. "Don't what babygirl?"

God it had felt like forever since he'd called her that. "I – I can't do this Roman. I can't do this again. I can't get attached to you and have you in my life and lose you again. What if you decide you really can't be with me, because of what I did? What if you are completely disgusted with me? What if you don't love me the way you used to?"

"Mackenzie what gave you the idea that I ever stopped loving you?" Roman asked. "Again I was lost, angry and confused, but I never stopped caring about you, missing you, loving you or needing you in my life." He stated honestly.

Mackenzie's head slowly lifted as her deep sea blue eyes found Roman's dark brown as they locked together. "Are you sure? I mean are you really sure?" She asked full of hope. Her hands slowly came up but stopped short of actually touching him. She wanted to touch his face and arms and chest and lips.

Roman's hand came up as he gently pushed his fingertips through her thick corkscrew curly hair. Jesus he missed her. "About as sure as I can be since the first day I laid eyes on you." His hands came up and cupped her cheeks as he watched her eyes glistening with fresh tears. This was harder on both of them then he thought it would be. They literally hadn't touched in almost 3 years. If it felt THIS good to be touching each other with clothes on after almost 3 years he couldn't imagine how great being completely naked with her again would feel.

Mackenzie felt like if she touched him the bubble would burst and he would disappear or she would wake up and he wouldn't have really been there; like it was all suddenly some kind of bad dream or nightmare. To be INCHES from the man you've loved but not be able to lay hands on him. It was why she hadn't touched him yet. If she closed her eyes and opened them and he was gone it was going to break her heart; it would literally kill her to think this was all just one giant dream.

"Touch me Kenzie." Roman requested. He watched as she shook her head negatively. "Just touch me once babygirl; I need to feel you." He requested and was NOT above begging her at this point. Roman's head dropped as he noticed her eyes were closed. His mouth moved to the shell of her ear. "Do you hear me Mackenzie?" He questioned and watched as she nodded. "This isn't a dream. I'm not playing with you anymore. I need you to touch me. At this point I don't even care if you slap me but I need you to touch me."

Again she shook her head negatively.

"Have I ever lied to you or hurt you?" Roman asked.

"No." Mackenzie whimpered out.

"Then I'm not asking anymore. I'm not requesting. I'm telling you to touch me."

Roman's dom voice rang through Mackenzie's ears; she could feel her heartbeat picking up. She exhaled a shaky breath as she let her fingertips start at the hem of Roman's white v-neck t-shirt. The cotton was so soft.

"Keep going babygirl."

Her eyes stayed closed as she slowly moved her fingers up the t-shirt as it was molded to Roman's stomach, abs and chest. It was almost as if the t-shirt was a second skin on him. She could feel his chest rising up and down as he breathed deeply. Her right hand made it to the center of his chest as his hand went over hers and stopped it from moving. She could feel his heart beating; through his chest – through the shirt against the palm of her hand.

Roman could see the silent tears as they were escaping her closed eyes. He finally let go of her hand as her hands moved up further and cupped his face. The stubble on his cheeks that grew that day tickling her fingertips. "Open your eyes and look at me Kenzie." Again his dom voice was in control.

Deep sea blue eyes opened as they locked with dark brown. "Roman…" She whimpered once more.

Roman couldn't even stop himself as he leaned down and buried his face in the crook of her neck as he wrapped his arms all the way around her body. The love of his life was back in his arms; back where she needed to be – back where she always belonged.

Mackenzie's small hands gripped two handfuls of Roman's t-shirt as he stood up straight lifting her off the floor but keeping her wrapped in his arms as the flood gates opened. "I'm so sorry Roman. I missed you so much."

He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding as her hands grabbed onto him for dear life.

Maybe now they could start the healing process…Maybe.