The kiss was better than anything her mind had conjured up previously. It was as if Ben has been made for her. He seemed to know exactly what she wanted from him without her having to utter a word. His hands roamed her body, as his tongue entered her mouth. Rey felt as if she might burst from the heat collecting in the pool of her stomach and lower. Ben was the first to pull away, he looked down at her, panting hard, his lips swollen from the contact,

'I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. I mean…'

'It's okay Ben.' Rey said gently putting her hand around his arm.

'It's not though is it? None of this is okay.' He said, turning to look out over the sea once more.

'I don't know who I am Rey. I don't remember any of this…I wouldn't even believe that this was my life if it wasn't for…' He trailed off.

'If it wasn't for what?' She pressed, squeezing his arm gently.

'If it wasn't for you. If it wasn't for the fact that when I'm with you I feel...calm, I feel at ease, I feel... home.'

Rey didn't need to hear anything else. She took his cheek in her hand turning his face gently until he was looking at her once more.

'Maybe that's all you need to know, right now.' She whispered gently before pressing her lips against his once more.

They drove home in silence, both deep in thought, their heads clouded by a champagne fuelled lusty fog. They sneaked glances at each other as they drove and laughed awkwardly when they caught each other looking. In short they acted like two people…

Don't think it. It will only make things harder when he leaves…

When they arrived back at the house, Rose took one look at Rey's flushed face and made a quick exit pulling a confused Finn behind her. Rey felt Ben's eyes on her as she removed her coat and shoes, and hung up her bag.

'It's late, we should head up.' She said, feeling a sense of anticipation hanging in the air.

Ben merely nodded and followed her up to the bedroom.

The walk to the second floor seemed longer that night. Rey was conflicted. On one hand she wanted him so very badly, and on the other, she knew that she would regret all the deceit that had led up to them being together.

They entered the bedroom and Rey turned to Ben.

'Ben, what if this wasn't your life?'

'What?'

'What if you could have a different one? What if you could be rich and want for nothing but the catch was you had to give up me and the kids. Would you want it? Would you want that life?'

'I...I don't know...I just want to remember who I am. I thought if I went along with all this, if I ignored the doubts then maybe it would all come back, but it hasn't. You don't understand how this feels Rey, it's like endless night in my mind. I see nothing but blackness...and then I see you. Rey, you're my light in the dark.'

Ben sat on the edge of the bed and held out his hands, Rey moved to stand between his legs, putting her small hands within his.

'Everything seems strange and there's this voice in my head telling me that things are not right…' Ben continued.

Rey winced as guilt consumed her.

'The voice is not mine...that I'm sure of, it's older, angry. It demands of me, but I don't know what it wants, I can't make out the words...yet. Maybe I will in time, but it hurts. It hurts to try and make out the words. So whenever I heard the voice, I thought of you. I thought of your smile, I thought of you dancing with Star, I thought of you chewing a pencil as you helped Warren with his homework and...it helped. So I thought about you more, and I found I liked thinking about you, and now, well, now I like thinking about you all the time, actually. So, although I had my doubts that this life was mine, and I still wonder about the strange voice. I believe that I belong here because I believe I truly belong wherever you are.'

Ben rubbed her hands gently with his thumbs as he spoke to her.

Rey swallowed hard fighting back tears. It was the most lovely thing anyone had ever said to her. All she wanted to do was jump forward into his lap and kiss him senseless, but she couldn't do it. It was wrong. She was lying to him. This wasn't the life she wanted with Ben...but would Ben still want a life with her when she told him the truth?

Ben ran a hand through his hair, 'I'm suddenly feeling very tired.' He said wearily.

Rey smiled down at him, 'I'm sure you are, let's get some rest. We can talk in the morning.'

Ben nodded as she leaned down and kissed his forehead.

Later, as she lay within Ben's strong embrace listening to his rhythmic breathing while he slept, she let her tears fall. Tomorrow, she would tell him everything and let the chips fall where they lay.

And if he choose to leave, she would just have to learn to live with it, though she suspected her heart might never recover.

The next morning Rey woke to Ben stroking her hair gently.

'We have to get up.' He said, 'it's the camping trip this weekend.'

'Oh!' Rey said jumping up. In all the excitement from the previous night, she had completely forgotten that this was the weekend they were all going up to the lake to camp out with Finn and Rose!

Rey jumped out of bed and tied her hair back into a bun. Okay, the truth could wait. She couldn't spoil the camping trip for the kids. They had been looking forward to it for weeks and they were even more excited to be going with Ben. The kids would keep them busy anyway so there wouldn't be anymore awkward intimate moments between them.

The next hour was a blur of packing and dressing and eating and shouting for Star and Warren to hurry up or they would get left behind.

Ben grabbed the keys to Rey's newly fixed car and headed outside with the tent and the barbecue. Her car had needed parts for months but thanks to the extra income provided by Ben, Rey had managed to get it running again.

She started to feel excited about the trip as she cleaned up the kitchen. She could tell Ben when they got home. A few days delay wouldn't make too much difference.

Rey was coming out of the house with their bags when she saw Ben coming towards her with a stern expression on his face. Her heart dropped in her chest.

Her first thought was. He knows.

'You want to tell me who these belong to?' Ben asked holding out a pair of men's underwear.

Rey frowned, the last thing she had been expecting was an inquisition about mystery pants.

'I don't know. Why on earth would I know? Where did you get those?'

'Don't lie to me Rey.'

'I'm not! I don't know what you're talking about!'

'I found them in your car.'

What? Where had they come from and how had they gotten into her car?!

'Where in my car did you find them?'

'There were in a brown envelope in the glove compartment.'

Oh God! The nurse at the hospital! She had given Rey Ben's few personal items in a brown envelope and in all the excitement Rey had forgotten about all about it. When they got back home she had panicked that the items would jog Ben's memory, so she had hidden them in the glove compartment of her broken down car. Knowing they wouldn't be using it anytime soon.

It was a stupid mistake for someone weaving a web of lies as big as she was to make, but maybe it was the push she needed to stop making excuses and finally face the music.

This is your wake up call Rey, time for you to put an end to this dream.

There was no other way to explain why they were in her car. She was all out of lies.

'Ben, I'm glad you found these, because it's time you knew the truth. There's something I've been trying to tell you for weeks now...we're not married. I made all of it all up. This isn't your house and these are not your children.'

'Just tell me who he is.' Ben said calmly. His hands balled into fists. He seemed to be blinded by his own rage.

'I am telling you! It's you! You're the guy! Those are yours and I just forgot I put them in there!' Rey said desperately.

'Oh come on Rey! I would never spring for Gucci swim shorts, And with tigers printed on them? Really? And look how tight these are! What kind of a prick would wear these?!'

Rey smacked her palm into her head, 'I'm telling you! These are yours! You are a millionaire with more money than sense and I'm a silly waitress who had a stupid idea to teach you a lesson and I'm so glad this is all finally out because it's not fair to you, you need to know who you truly are no matter how I feel about it.'

'I'll find out you know. It's a small town, Rey. I'll find out who he is.'

Rey groaned with frustration and grabbed Ben's hand, 'Come with me.' She dragged him into the house and stood in front of the tv so Star and Warren would have to look at her.

'Kids, I want you to tell Ben the truth, tell him that he isn't your dad.'

Warren didn't even blink, 'but he is our dad.'

Ben folded his large arms across his ample chest smugly.

Rey sighed, 'No, don't tell him what I told you to tell him, tell him the truth!'

Star looked at Rey, 'Daddy hit his head and he was missing for days and we were so worried, but now he's back and everything is okay again.' She looked up at Ben with a simpering smile and he smiled back at her.

'I don't know why you are maintaining this ridiculous charade, Rey, but when you're ready to talk sensibly, I'll be on the front porch.'

Once Ben had left the room Rey turned back to her children, 'This isn't right you know, he has to know the truth.'

'No he doesn't. He's happy with us and we're happy with him. We want to keep him,' Warren said.

'We can't keep him! He isn't ours to keep! He isn't a pet!' Rey cried.

'He is too ours! He told me he would always be my daddy!' Star said with tears forming in her eyes.

What have I done? Rey thought with dread. She left the room and stood in the kitchen trying to figure out how she could fix the situation, but there was no solution. Whatever happened, someone was going to get hurt so she decided it was better to just be honest and deal with the fallout.

She slowly left the house ready to face Ben, and was startled to find him talking to a very animated Rose out on the front porch. When Ben saw her, he starting walking towards her with outstretched arms.

'It's okay. Rose has explained everything.'

'What?' Rey asked, clearly confused.

Rose came forward, 'I explained how you were covering for me because I cheated on Finn one night and I borrowed your car to cover my tracks. It's okay Rey. You don't need to lie anymore. I'm goina come clean with Finn. It's not right to keep this from him any longer.'

'Rose…..'

'I said it's okay, Rey,' Rose said taking her friends hands in hers, 'I don't want anything to come between the two of you. You're great together.'

Rey wanted to cry, she felt guilty and panicked but also relieved. Relieved that her friends lie explained everything and seemed much more plausible than the actual truth.

So Rey shut up and went along with Rose's story, because it was easier, and because Ben had wrapped his warm, strong arms around her and was telling her that she was a good friend with a crazy, overactive imagination, and with her face pressed up against his chest breathing in his scent, she could trick herself into thinking that everything would be just fine. That this was as it should be, and she wasn't just falling in love with a dream.