Chapter 20 of Year 4: Bad Moon Rising
Josie took a smoker's breath, heavy on the intake through the nose and light on the release out of the mouth. It was a common movement but was done so perfectly that it led Lily to wonder if Josie had found other means of dealing with her anxiety. That was how Lily's grandfather had started; the same grandfather who died of lung cancer with a lit fag dangling between his slack fingers. Marlene entered the room before Lily could think of a casual way to ask Josie about it.
"If you see Frank before I do, tell him 'geraniums' from Alice. Apparently, he'll know what that means," Marlene said in a rush, peeling off her Quidditch robes and replacing them with her dressing gown. "Oh, and Snape said he's going to meet you there."
"Was he with Mulciber?" Lily asked trying not to sound upset about it. The only reason why Sev wouldn't wait for her would be because of Mulciber. Marlene shrugged and strolled out of the room.
"Tell Eilidh to hurry up!" Josie called after her. Lily watched Josie's expression on the mirror as she put on her lip gloss. "You can go. I'm just waiting for Eilidh."
"You nervous about tonight?" Lily asked casually, bending down to look like she was fixing the straps on her wedges.
"A little," she shrugged.
"Have you taken a calming draught?" Lily asked, unnecessarily smoothing her skirt.
"I'm not that nervous." Josie smiled confidently. "Marlene already reminded me to bring some with me so don't waste your breath."
"I'll see you there then." Lily breathed, loudly. At Josie's look of concern, she smiled, trying to seem nonchalant. She didn't feel comfortable about leaving Josie alone tonight but felt she couldn't stall any longer.
Lily had a bad feeling about tonight in general. Severus had called it nerves but then Remus didn't show up to class and that was usually a bad omen. Nothing terrible had happened in the day so far, but she had lost her favourite pen sometime during lunch and was forced to borrow a quill for the rest of the day. Maybe this time, Remus's absence was only a warning for a mild inconvenience.
Slughorn's dinner party was held in a banquet hall at the opposite end of the castle. Something about the room's stuffy and over glamorous appearance made Lily long for the easy atmosphere of the Great Hall.
"Lookin' good Lily," winked a Ravenclaw boy by the name of Gilles Zabini who always looked at her like that whether she was in dress robes or not.
"Thanks," she said shortly and glided past him without a second thought. She searched the room trying to find Severus.
Professor Slughorn was chatting with a bored looking woman, a smile never leaving his face. The woman wore a band of white diamonds around her head, black diamonds studded her ears and trailed around her neck, and a different stone adorned every finger on the hand she lazily used to bring a champagne glass to her overdrawn lips. Lily had the distinct impression that she wasn't listening to a word Slughorn was saying.
"Hey Lily!" a short Hufflepuff girl named Carina (and a close friend of Bertha Jorkins,) touched her arm. "Have you heard about the Death Eaters in the forbidden forest last night?"
"Death Eaters? No," Lily said, more confused than frightened. Any rumour coming from a friend of Bertha Jorkins was bound to be more speculation than truth.
"Yeah, apparently last night Hagrid saw a few Death Eaters cursing the castle and called Dumbledore. All the professors came out and chased them off but no one knows if their curse succeeded yet. I tried asking Professor Slughorn but he refused to say anything. You'd think he would, all things considered," Carina shrugged, gazing at Slughorn.
A thousand arguments flooded Lily's mind. She pursed her lips, trapping the words in and said instead, "I'm sure if it's anything important Dumbledore will tell us about it sooner or later." With a gentle smile, she pressed on, determined to find Severus, hoping, against her better logic, that he wasn't with his Slytherins friends.
"Oh! Frank," Lily said, reaching out to grab Frank Longbottom's attention. "Marlene told me that Alice said geraniums and that you'd know what that meant."
"Thanks. Um, are you - you're friends with James now, right?" Frank asked. Lily felt her face flushed scarlet. Her eyes dashed around the room, hoping neither Potter or Severus was anywhere near her.
"Er, not exactly. I mean it's complicated," she said awkwardly, guilt coursing through her.
"Oh. Well, do you know if he was planning on coming here tonight? Sirius is here and it's kinda suspicious not to see them together," Frank said, a worry line forming between his brows.
A cruel voice in the back of her head gave her an unnecessary reminder: Remus wasn't in class today.
"Black is here?" she asked. She couldn't think of any reason why they would arrive separately.
"Yeah, with Slughorn." Frank pointed toward where Lily had seen Professor Slughorn talking with that woman with the diamonds. Turning, she now saw both the Black brothers standing with Rabastan Lestrange; he seemed to be the only one carrying a conversation with the now attentive woman.
"Potter never told me he wasn't coming, but I'll ask Black," Lily promised.
"Thanks. I'll go back around. Maybe I missed him," Frank said, his face now tense with determination.
"If you see Severus Snape, tell him I'm with Slughorn," Lily requested. Frank waved a hand without turning around before he disappeared in the crowd.
Before Lily had reached the group, Slughorn gestured for her to move quicker, his face lighting up. "Lily Evans meet Amoriel Lestrange. Miss Evans is one of my top students."
"Pleasure," the diamond-encrusted woman, Amoriel Lestrange, said dully, graciously accepting Lily's offered hand. Lily noted that her grip was especially weak.
"Oh, the pleasure's mine. I've been looking forward to meeting you." Lily grinned, broadly, and spoke in a preppy and excited voice. However, her mind was swirling with a thousand negative thoughts about what could have caused Severus and Potter to disappear at the same time.
"How sweet." Mrs Lestrange's smile was more like a snarl. The elder Black scoffed loudly and gulped down his drink while the younger glared at him. Rabastan Lestrange smiled. His eyes looked sinisterly amused, and it gave Lily an odd empty feeling in the pit of her stomach.
"Miss Evans is particularly interested in the Wizengamot," Slughorn said, determined to keep a conversation flowing between himself and Mrs Lestrange. Lily didn't want to be apart of this conversation at all but it was apparent to her that this connection was very important to her professor. They had formed an odd sort of friendship over the years so she didn't let her irritation show.
"Yes, ma'am. I hope to have a seat with them one day, partially inspired by your hand in The Public v Thicknesse trial," she lied but she had a feeling that flattery was the way to go with Mrs Lestrange. The woman did indeed puff up like a peacock and continued the conversation looking down her nose at Lily.
"It would be smart to have a backup plan just in case. The Wizengamot doesn't accept simply anyone."
Lily did not like the way Amoriel Lestrange said "anyone." It sounded more like she meant anything, and that anything meant Lily and Lily meant dirt.
"Oh, I know," Lily grinned, allowing only her toes to curl in indignation. "I want to start in the Department of International Cooperation, specifically the International Confederation of Wizards." She didn't need to say "like Angelina Martin," which had been Mrs Lestrange's biggest competition in The Public v Thicknesse trial.
"Yes, you do have to be somewhat adaptable to fill those seats."
Once again, Mrs Lestrange's word "adaptable" seemed to have a double meaning, one that made Lily feel minuscule.
"Okay! Why is no one dancing?" Black demanded, suddenly and loudly. "There's music playing and no one dancing! Evans?"
Without waiting for an answer, Black grabbed her and ushered her away from the group into a small clearing in the crowd and began to 'dance' but it was more her holding him up as he swayed in no particular rhythm.
"Are you drunk?" Lily asked, laughing at the idea. He didn't smell drunk.
"Maybe a smidge but you have no idea how good champagne tastes," Black said, fighting to stand on his own. "I can feel the world spinning," he whispered, staring at his shoes.
"I'm surprised you've never tried champagne before," Lily laughed.
"Mum said I already acted like an idiot and that I don't need any help in that department,'' Black said taking her hand and starting to move them in a sloppy waltz.
"Partially true," Lily said, watching their feet carefully so she didn't get stepped on. He sniggered.
"Hey, that's mean!" he exclaimed but he was shocked and not insulted so Lily didn't feel bad about laughing.
"Sirius?" She said cautiously. He hummed in response, gazing over her head at something lightened his face and stilled his drunken swaying. Lily didn't think it polite to look. "What did Lestrange mean by adaptable?"
"That bitch!" Black said, looking down at her. He wasn't angry with her but there was a ferocity in his eyes that chilled her. "She was talking about you being a muggle-born and how you're learning to live in the wizarding world."
"That's not really a bad thing," Lily mumbled.
"Yeah, well, believe me, she doesn't mean it as a compliment," he said, returning to stare at whatever it was behind her.
"I'm not insulted," she said honestly. Out of all of her faults not being pure-blooded was the stupidest one. Lily didn't even consider it to be a fault. She was able to do something that Amoriel Lestrange, with all her money, power, and connection could never do. It wasn't a weakness it was a strength, one that people like Amoriel Lestrange needed to stop underestimating.
"Good," Sirius said and half turned them with a swooping step. Lily peered around him curiously but saw nothing except Frank talking with Marlene, Alice, Eilidh, and Josie.
"Do you know where Potter is?" Lily asked, remembering the reason why she had approached him in the first place. Either she was getting better at reading him or his remaining drunkenness was delaying his reactions; whatever the reason, he looked guilty.
"Er, no," he said, clearing his throat. Within seconds he wore his familiar mask of innocence.
"Right." Lily took her hand from his. Something was happening to Severus, she knew it. "Do you know generally where he is?"
"On his way," Black shrugged. "Do you know when they're going to serve food 'cause I'm in half a mind to-"
"Black! What are you two up to?" Lily demanded.
"Nothing," he said, shocked that he, of all people, would be accused of being up to something.
"Where's Remus?" Lily asked. It had to be connected, it just had to.
"He's ill," Black answered promptly.
"And Peter?" she continued.
Black gave a long shrug. "Didn't want to come. Can't say I blame him."
"Is Potter with Severus?" She held her breath, studying his face as she waited for his answer.
Black made a derisive noise of disgust. "No! He hates the fucker. Why would he seek him out? Isn't his fault the idiot turns up everywhere he goes. Why don't you tell him to get a life?"
"Stop it!" Lily warned, her hands balled into fists at her sides. Black sighed irritably.
"Look," he breathed. "I'll help you find James if you want. I'm sure he wouldn't mind you knowing what he's up to."
"So you are up to something?" Lily accused.
"Oh, shut up." Black stormed past her, not looking to see if she would follow. Lily fought with the need to hit him with a good stinging hex and the need to know what Potter was up to.
She started to follow him before she had consciously decided to do it. He wasn't heading for the door that led out to the rest of the castle, instead, he strode directly to the window that opened into a balcony. He opened it up, letting a chill flow through the room and found a couple too preoccupied to come up for air let alone to look at who had discovered them. Sirius turned quickly away, looking embarrassed but then he chuckled softly.
"She was right," he whispered. Lily looked back at the couple. Fabian Lynch and Moira Castro's relationship was a very public affair, one that Lily knew for sure that Black knew about. Every time he and Potter had seen the couple show any form of affection to each other in the corridor they made it a point to interrupt them: It was a spectacle that both amused and annoyed her.
"Who and what was she right about?" Lily asked.
"Nothing," Black said in a way that warned her to not ask any more questions. He strode away, leaving her to close the window before scurrying to follow.
There was a door hidden behind the self-playing orchestra that Black cracked open. He pulled his head back quickly with a pained expression.
"No one's been in there for ages," he said, sounding like he was holding back a gag or a sneeze. He cleared his throat and turned away. Lily was beginning to wonder if he actually knew where Potter was.
Black moved forward, grasping her hand so they wouldn't be separated by the crowd. This time he led her out the door to the rest of the castle, the sound of their party echoing through the empty corridor until the door was shut and all fell silent. It was so quiet she could hear Black's steady breathing and the flames from the torches whispering in the air.
"Does this seem odd to you?" Black asked, his eyes sweeping over every inch of the corridor in such a paranoid way it made Lily's stomach churn with fright.
"Wands out?" she asked. She didn't know if they should really be expecting danger but the sudden change in mood was odd. The castle was usually lively even at night but there wasn't a ghost or stray pet in sight.
"Maybe," he said, stepping forward without taking out his wand. Lily took out hers just to be safe.
They moved slowly and steadily like they were on a casual stroll throughout the castle. Black's intense vigilance never ceased though, and that only aided Lily's fear.
She could hear a soft murmur of voices now, and dull thuds occasionally accompanied by low grunts, all of which began to build in volume as they came closer to the source. Black's pace had hastened from a casual stroll to a hurried walk.
A voice had muttered 'something, something, Potter.' It was the goading, sneering tone behind the word Potter that made the speaker's intentions quite clear: Someone was trying to hurt James.
But James couldn't be hurt. James Potter, with his constant smirk and playful eyes, was impervious to pain.
Black jogged along the corridor, his wand in hand, head-turning frantically from side to side. And then they heard it; a scream of pain that caused Black to break out into a run and Lily to be filled with sickening dread.
Someone had hurt James.
Lily arrived at the scene at the same time as Black. There was a small circle formed down the Charms corridor barely illuminated by a single moonbeam. In the middle stood a single figure, leering at something on the ground. The left side of the circle was pushing a second figure back into standing position. A pair of square glasses glinted in the moonlight as James stumbled to regain his balance then he charged at the first figure. He didn't use his wand but his fists. He punched his opponent three times, each time blood spewed from the oppositions face. Smack! - Smack! - Smack! After the third, a deafening crunch like bones breaking sounded and Lily screamed while Black broke into action.
"Stupefy! Impedimenta! Petrificus Totalus!" He cast the spells so quickly his wand movements were blurred. The three people who were blocking the centre of their circle dropped. James was standing, panting, covered in a sheen of sweat, fists still clenched hanging at his side, glaring down at his opponent who had fallen to the ground.
Severus stared up at Potter with an equal amount of hatred, blood trickling down from his swollen nose into his slightly parted lips. Behind them stood three more people, Slytherins, pointing their wands at Black.
"Severus," she said, her voice sounding hollow and unnatural. There had to be more to what happened here than what it seemed.
"He started it," Severus said in a low waspish voice as he clambered to his feet.
"Bull shit!" James gave a short ironic laugh that made Lily's stomach flip.
"Typical Potter, too stupid to remember something that happened less than five minutes ago," Severus sneered. It wasn't Potter that dived for him but Black.
Black and Severus rolled on the floor, fighting for dominance while knees collided with chests, elbows with faces, and fists with heads. The Slytherins backed out of their way but Potter stooped to grab one of them and ended up pulling Severus off.
"Stop!" Lily ordered, the strength in her voice finally returning. "Let go of him!" She stormed forward, her wand pointed at Potter as she reached out to tug Severus from his grasp.
"I didn't start this," Potter said, his voice hoarse and eyes cold. He held out a hand to signal Black to stay put. For whatever reason, Black listened.
"Just leave him alone," Lily said and pushed Severus away before he could get a chance to say anything.
"I didn't need your help," Severus said softly. Still, Lily thought she heard a note of bitterness in his tone.
"It doesn't matter. I wasn't about to stand there and watch that happen," Lily said, her voice embarrassingly thick.
"You didn't have to, you could have walked away," he said, staring at his feet moving briskly like he was trying to get away from her.
"I'm taking you to the hospital wing!" Lily told him and she was distantly reminded of her sister telling her parents that she would be staying out past her curfew.
"I don't need to go -"
"You're bleeding, Sev -"
"It'll stop on its own!"
"And it'll give you time to explain to me exactly what happened," Lily said as threateningly as she could muster.
"You believe him?" It wasn't a question, though it was posed as one; it was an accusation, one that Lily needed to dispel quickly.
"As your best friend, Severus, I'm concerned for you and would like to know what happened," she said, steadily.
"But he's your friend too, isn't he? I'm not an idiot and I'm not blind. I see you smiling at him in class. Talking to him in the corridors when you think I'm not there." Severus stopped there but seemed to want to say so much more. He was never supposed to find out about that, she thought she had been discreet.
Lily had only herself to blame. She had been lying to him for weeks and, yes, sneaking around with James Potter. Disloyalty. There was no other word for it. She had committed a disgusting, sneaky act of disloyalty and in doing so she had shown Severus that his friendship meant nothing.
She leant forward and kissed his cheek. When she spoke she did it gently hoping her sincerity showed in her tone because she couldn't muster the courage for a true confession.
"Friends don't treat each other like that. Friends don't hurt each other. If he was my true friend he wouldn't have hurt you no matter the history between you two because hurting you hurts me."
Severus stilled and his expression became unreadable; it always did when things reached an emotion besides anger. Lily linked her arm with his and started leading him toward the hospital wing.
"Will you tell me what happened?" Lily asked, cautiously. She didn't want their argument to start again.
"Potter tripped me," he said quickly. "I pushed him back then… I don't know it, happened so quickly it's kind of a blur."
It made sense. Potter had tripped Severus too many times to count and Severus wasn't the kind of person to walk away, especially in front of his Slytherin friends. She didn't ask why he and his friends weren't at the party; she didn't want to know.
******I used a riddle originally written by Tolkien and didn't give him credit for it (thank you to the guest reader who pointed this out to me) in chapter 43
Jily shippers don't hate me, it'll happen I promise. Lily stans, I'm sorry...
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XO