Story: It Is What It Is, Chapter 17
Disclaimer: I don't own FMA.

BAD CHAPTER NAME IS BAD

Also, I had to take Ling's fainting serious for this, but I promise he'll be fine, he just needs to keep snacks with him! This is also my first time ever writing for Ling, so I hope I portrayed him decently.

Sorry this chapter is so short, and it only included Ling and Al, but it's something... I'm having really bad nausea and acid reflux due one of my medicines and my arms and legs are hurting and shaking right now. On top of that, I have a headache, so I hope you all will bear with me.

So a very important person to me who once cut behaves a lot like Ling, so I'm basing him off of personal experience in this. Maybe it's a little extreme having Ling of all people have had the same issues Ed does and Roy did, but he did it for a different reason than Roy or Ed. The societal expectations in Xing are supposed to be incredibly stressful, especially for those of royalty and I will go further into his reasoning at a later point in the actual story. But I feel like Ling is at a point that he could confidently help Ed and speak of what had worked for him in the past.

Don't get me wrong, Roy is still going to be just as helpful and will probably talk at some point with Edward about what he did and what helped him personally too.

Replies to Reviews

KittyKatz009 said: Yes an update! First off, I hope you are well and it's cool you want to study psychology. It's an interesting field for sure! I like how so in character Al was in this chapter. Researching is definitely something he would do in a time like this to get a grasp on what's going on. I felt that the interactions between Riza and Ed were smooth as well and the touch about his hair being played with relaxing him was a good one. I'm interested to see what role Ling (and later Winry) will play in this story. Keep up the great work!

Yes, I've been there, so psychology, I feel, is the right path for me. I think Alphonse would definitely research as well. And yes, the sense of touch will definitely play a bit of a role in Edward's recovery.

Pi pi m: I love it, thanks for the update

No problem! I'm glad you liked it! :D

sincity27: That was cringe, I actually thought it was sweet.

I'm glad you thought it was sweet. I was worried. :D;;;

"That's quite the touchy subject you're reading about there. Surely, you couldn't be reading about it for fun."

Alphonse jumped when he was snapped out of his thoughts by a familiar voice. He turned around to see his Xingese friend standing there. "Ling!"

Ling always had had a knack for popping in out of nowhere, but it was no less startling to Alphonse.

"How long have you been there?! And where are your bodyguards?" Alphonse asked.

"Just a short while. And don't tell anybody, but I kind of ditched them… Don't get me wrong, I like them, but being followed around all the time is kind of exhausting." Ling said after a brief pause, scratching his head.

I almost feel bad for his bodyguards, but, as a prince, Ling probably never has any time to himself… I couldn't even begin to imagine it.

Ling sat down beside him and placed his cheek in his hand. "So, if you don't mind me asking… why were you reading about self-harm?"

Alphonse grew a little tense at the question. What can I say? I doubt even Ling will buy it if I said I was just curious. But brother would probably kill me if I told him about it... "Um, well, you see, a friend of mine has been cutting himself, and I'm trying to figure how to help him."

"Perhaps I could provide you with some assistance then." Ling said.

"Well, of course I could use all the assistant I can get, but how do you know about this?" Alphonse was immediately surprised by Ling's offer. How does he know anything about this? Could he-

Ling began to undo part of his sarashi to reveal a section of scars on his forearm. Some of them looked like they must have been pretty bad up close, but, since they were faded, they wouldn't have been that noticeable at a distance.

"Ling, you…" Alphonse didn't know what to think. Ling, of all people, who appeared so happy and content all the time, had went through the same rough period Edward was going through?

"I actually used to cut myself a few years back, so I can answer any questions you have." Ling explained, interrupting Alphonse's thoughts, but confirming his suspicions that he wanted to deny.

He sounds so care-free, like he's not bothered by it at all.

"Wait, are you sure…? I don't want to push you to do something you don't want to…" Alphonse mumbled with uncertainty.

"Go right ahead, really, I wouldn't have offered if I didn't mean it. But first… This friend you speak of…" Ling's eyes narrowed ever so slightly. "It's Edward, isn't it?"

Alphonse was shocked. I really want to deny it, and Brother will probably be mad at me for this, but maybe I can trust him... And Ed needs as much support from friends as he can get right now. (Although Brother would probably deny that they're actually friends…)

"...How did you know?" Alphonse asked incredulously.

"Intuition." Ling answered vaguely.

Of course he wouldn't give a straight answer... .

But it should have been so obvious, Alphonse suddenly realized. Edward had been visibly depressed for at least a month, it would only make sense that Ling would notice, especially if he'd went through the same thing before.

"So how long ago did you find out…?" Ling asked.

"Just yesterday… Apparently, Brother nearly died due to cutting on the mission he went off on with his commanding officer." Alphonse explained.

"I see..." Ling seemed to muse over it for a second.

"Please, Ling, you have to tell me how to get him to stop. I'm so worried that he's going to kill himself doing this..." Alphonse asked.

"Unfortunately, it's not that simple." Ling said. "I understand your frustration, but unless Ed actually wants to, it's going to be very difficult to get him to. Has he verbalized any desire to stop?"

"Yes, I think so. Yesterday, he admitted that we need to work through it, if that counts for anything..." Alphonse said. He knew that Edward wasn't beyond saying what he could to please those around him, but he liked to believe that wasn't his brother's intentions.

"Hmm…" Ling thought about it, as if considering something. "It would be probably be more help if I could actually speak to him myself… But I can wait a bit on that."

"He's off at work, so you wouldn't be able to get up with him until later anyway…" Alphonse said. "So can you... um… tell me why he would be… doing that to himself?"

"Sorry, I can only speak for myself when it comes to this," Ling apologized, "but there are usually four reasons people cut. The first being for escape or detachment, the second being a release, the third being distraction, and the fourth being for connection. Chances are he's either doing it for a release or an escape, since he isn't good at expressing himself."

"That actually makes some sense." Alphonse thought about it. "Brother is terrible at outsourcing and he never talks about his emotions or feelings. But he has people he can trust everywhere. I just don't understand why he-"

"Not quite." Ling interrupted. "Ed may have friends, but that's not always enough... It's possible that he is afraid of letting you and others in for some reason. Aside from a fear of judgement that often comes with these kind of things, has he faced any kind of abandonment or loss in the past that would make it hard to trust others?"

Loss.

Hughes, Nina, Mom.

Abandonment…

…!

That's it. How could I have been so ignorant…?!

"Dad!" Alphonse shouted. It makes so much sense now. Brother is afraid of letting others in, because he's afraid of them leaving him.

"Woah…!" Ling edged back a bit, startled.

Alphonse seemed to ignore him however, and continued. "Dad left when we were very young. Brother always hated him for it... And he also blamed him for Mom's death."

"Were they close, before it happened…?" Ling murmured, deep in thought. There was a reflective look in his eyes.

"I suppose. Since we were so young at the time, we don't remember him all that well, but I think what memories I have of him were actually fairly decent. But my brother was apparently so hurt by it that he refuses to even call him dad anymore."

"Wow, that must have been rough for him…" Ling offered, amazed. "Because of how many siblings I have, I've never actually had the chance to be close to my own father."

Even though Ling didn't say it, Alphonse knew that that was an automatic price that came along with being a person of nobility, especially being the emperor's son.

"Ling, what happened to your mother?" Alphonse asked.

"I was pulled away from her when I was eight and placed in the dorms. It's the regulation of all males of royalty in Xing." Ling explained.

"I see… Eight? We were pretty young too when we lost ours."" Alphonse mused.

"So anyway," Ling changed the conversation, "have you found any coping mechanisms in these books that you could have Ed try?"

"I did read about a few coping mechanisms, but I don't know if any of them will work." Alphonse said, uncertainly.

"Mind naming some of them?" Ling inquired.

"It was mainly things like drawing, exercise, reading, using a red marker on your skin, and writing." Alphonse explained.

"Perhaps he could try meditation?" Ling suggested. "Even acupuncture might be able to offer him some relief from his thoughts."

"Unfortunately, I doubt that that would work. Brother isn't the type to sit still for long." Alphonse said.

"Exactly," Ling, however, seemed painfully aware. "That's his problem. He can't ever relax because he's always pushing himself.. Maybe he's afraid that something bad will happen if he doesn't."

Alphonse grew silent at hearing that. It's true… Ed never relaxes. He's always getting himself into trouble, because of that inability to sit still for even five minutes. Could it be my fault? Brother is always preoccupied with getting my body back that he often fails to look after his own health...

"Hey, Alphonse, I'd like to see Ed for myself, so is it okay if I drop by later? I'm going to have to... go for now..." Ling suddenly said, as he stood up. Are his arms shaking? He kind of looks pale.

"Sure, we can continue this conversation later, then." Alphonse nodded. However, he grew worried when Ling seemed to sway a bit.
"Hey, are you alright?"

"I will be... It's just my… hypoglycemia..." Ling said.

Alphonse didn't know what Ling was talking about, but knew that something wasn't right. "Ling, maybe you should sit down."

"Hey, is everything okay over here?"

"Sir, are you alright?"

Ling opened his mouth to speak in response to the two voices, but it was at that moment that he fell to the floor, nearly unconscious.

"I need food…" he finally uttered.

How could I forget? Ling faints when he gets hungry...

Alphonse sighed.

- End of Chapter

A/N: I hope you guys liked this okay. I'm so fucking terrible. D'x x'D