Chapter 22 – Follow You.

Three days later

Jay sat on his hospital bed, Lexi stood in front of him helping him pull a t-shirt over his head. He had been in the hospital for five days and was tired of wearing the standard issue hospital gown. He wanted to feel a bit more human, in actual clothes. He had been allowed to shower for the first time today, with the assistance of Lexi who had used all her willpower not to leap on him the second he was naked in front of her.

Jay had managed to put on his black sweat pants without help but needed help getting his t-shirt over his casted arm and over the stitches from his surgery. Jay grimaced as he stretched his arm to high and pulled the stitches a little on his side.

"Shit I'm sorry" Lexi said pulling his shirt gently down over his stomach.

Jay exhaled deeply and closed his eyes waiting for the shooting pain in his side to subside. "It's okay, it wasn't your fault"

"Technically it kinda of is," Lexi told him smirking a little to show she was only half joking "Kelly punched you, Calvin tried to kill you, all because of this girl right here" she said pointing at herself.

"You know, now that I think about it, you're right!" Jay smiled "being your friend kinda hurts"

Ouch! – Lexi thought. He had called her his friend, that hurt more than she would have admitted. Although neither of them had said their relationship was over, Lexi figured that was Jay's subtle way of making it a little clearer.

"Being your friend isn't a walk in the park either you know" Lexi joked grinning hoping it hid the hurt in her eyes.

Jay laughed, "Is that so?"

"Yeah, I mean how many times have I had to save you from a bad date, took your drunk ass home, hid your hungover ass from Voight, bought you lunch because you conveniently forgot your wallet?"

Jay chuckled, she had done all those things numerous times. Jay played along and tried to look offended, "yeah well you steal the bed covers" he chided listing one of her flaws.

Lexi laughed, was that the only thing he could think of, she smirked replying "Oh, sleep with all your friends do you?"

Jay grabbed the waist of her jeans, hooking his fingers over the top he pulled her closer to him. He wanted to kiss her, it felt right, they had been flirting and joking around for a few days, it felt like the right time to kiss her. It didn't mean he wanted to jump back in to their relationship, one step at a time. Jay looked up at her slowly moving his head closer to hers he said, "Only the hot ones".

Lexi leaned in to him, she joked "So you and Ruzek have…" she jested implying Adam was one of Jay's hot friends and they had slept together.

Jay's lips brushed hers as he whispered softly "Oh yeah loads of times."

Adam bursting through the door and announcing, "Your saviour has arrived!" interrupted them. Jay stood up quickly making Lexi take a couple steps back. Jay had pulled away like a naughty school child having been caught doing something he shouldn't be. He wasn't ready for their relationship, or the restart of their relationship to be public knowledge right now.

Lexi cleared her throat "speak of the devil" she remarked walking around Jay and to the other side of the bed as Adam appeared from around the corner carrying bags of fast food.

Author note: the below section was inspired by a song called "Follow You" by a band called Bring Me The Horizon. I haven't used the direct lyric but just wanted to give credit where credit is due.

Lexi rolled over in the bed, she lay there for a few seconds, it wasn't comfortable at all, she rolled over on to her other side. That wasn't comfortable either, she lay on her back staring at the ceiling of the hospital room, she wasn't going to sleep tonight. The bed was uncomfortable, and her mind was working overtime. She couldn't stop thinking about almost kissing Jay earlier in the day. Or forget how quickly he had pulled away from her when Adam had entered the room.

"Lex" Jay said from his bed, she turned her head to look at him, ready to apologise for waking him up. "Get over here" he said shuffling over in the bed and holding up the covers.

The light in the room was off, but the light from the hallway illuminated enough of the room to still be able to see.

Lexi crawled out of her bed and crossed the room. Getting under the covers beside him, Jay rolled on to his back putting his arm around her as she laid her head on his chest.

They lay in the darkened room. Lexi knew he wasn't asleep from his breathing pattern, he was snoozing but not completely asleep. "You know you don't have to spend every night here, right?" he asked aloud knowing she wasn't sleeping either.

Lexi's whole body involuntarily tensed, did he not want her there? Was he telling her to leave? Was he having second thoughts about her after their almost kiss this morning before Adam interrupted? "Do you want me to go?" she asked

"No" he said quickly turning on to his side. Lexi copied his position and lay on her side, her head on the pillow beside his. "I want you here, all the time, every day, every night" he assured her "I just don't want you to feel like you have to be here. You can go home, sleep in a proper bed"

Lexi chucked a little "I presently don't have a home" she reminded him.

"Yes, you do" he told her pushing some stray hairs behind her ear allowing him to see her face better. "You'll always have a home with me" Lexi smiled, how did he always know how to make her feel better? How did he always find the right words to make her feel like she was the only person in the world? "It doesn't matter what's going on with us" he continued "you're always welcome wherever I am"

Lexi leant in and kissed his forehead. "How do you do that?" she asked

"Do what?"

"Make me forget everything? Make me feel better? Put my mind at ease?"

"I've told you before, you hit the jackpot with me" he smirked "I'm amazing"

Lexi laughed remembering him telling her how she had hit the jackpot outside his apartment after he had taken her on a date and just before he had put his cold hands on her which led to one of the best nights they had spent together. "You really are" she agreed.

"So how close did you get to your running away plan?" Jay enquired. He knew she had thought about running away, disappearing in the night without a trace, she knew enough bad people to make it happen. It was probably what had made her think about the Chameleon, which led to the plan she had gone through with.

"Pretty close" she admitted

"We talking middle of the night disappearing or elaborate fake your own death?" Jay asked smirking.

Lexi returned his joking smirk. "Oh, full works fake my own death"

"Well I'm glad you decided to stay" he told her leaning in and kissing her forehead.

Jay closed his eyes and Lexi knew he was becoming tired. She watched him, contemplating everything that had gone on between them. He really was amazing to her, he always had been, he was always there when she needed him and even at times when she needed him and hadn't realised it. He knew her better than she knew herself. She had thought about running away, after Kelly had been bought to the hospital, she thought her leaving would be best for everyone. She could protect everyone by leaving.

Jay was thankful she hadn't left, but she didn't know why? She wasn't good for him, she caused him nothing but pain, physically and emotionally. She had cheated on him, for a start. Had she led Jay on? She had always kept him dangling on a string, flirting with him, teasing him, always made sure she was just out of arms reach to him, yet near enough to pull him closer when she needed him.

Then again, she felt like she had been there for him, in his times of need too.

Lexi had always known how Jay felt about her, had she played on that? Had she used it to her advantage? She had been selfish when it came to Jay and he deserved better. Lexi was going to be better for Jay.

"What's on your mind?" Jay asked without opening his eyes. He knew her too well, he could practically hear the cogs turning over in her brain as she lay beside him.

"Did I lead you on?" she asked

Jay's eyes shot open "What?" he sounded shocked like it was the most ridiculous question he had ever been asked.

"I'm serious" Lexi explained "even when I was with Kelly, I always flirted with you, kept you close, did I lead you on? Did I play on your feelings for me? Make you believe that there was a chance for us? Even when there wasn't or shouldn't have been?"

Jay sat up in the bed leaning on the elbow of his good arm, he pushed the switch above his bed turning on the room's lights enabling him to see her properly. "Is that really what you think? That you made me believe we'd someday be together?"

Lexi sat up blinking as her eyes adjusted to the bright lights, she stared down at her legs through the blanket not having the guts to look him in the eye, the more she thought about it the more it made sense. Why else would he still want to around her? Be her friend? "Why else would you stick around all this time? Put up with all my shit?"

Jay pulled on her shoulder, asking her to look at him. She turned to face him. "Lex, I know everything's a little messed up right now, everything's unstable but you have to know I'd follow you through hell, as long as I can hold your hand." He winked at her "Not because you led me on or any other reason than I want to, I want you in my life, whatever it takes."

Lexi smiled, she felt like she could illuminate the whole of Chicago with the way he made her feel. "I've got you under my spell" Lexi said trying to ease the serious tone that the conversation had taken.

"Oh, that's what I want you to think" Jay grinned at her "maybe you're under my spell"

"If I am, I'd happily stay here forever" Lexi confirmed leaning towards him wanting to kiss him.

Lexi pulled away hearing the door open. A Nurse walked around the corner enquiring "Everything okay? I saw the light was on"

Lexi wanted to scream at her, everything would be fine if people would stop interrupting them!