Loyalty Amongst Strangers
Kagome's fear was at an all time high as she was brought into her father's study. She would be alone there with no one to save her if his 'correcting' got out of hand. No witnesses if any foul play befell her, not that anyone would help her anyway. It would be their word against a king's. Naraku had promised to return to her to Sesshoumaru later in one piece, but Kagome was very mistrustful of that man's words. She knew he was capable of hurting her badly.
"Are you finished with your crying Kagome?" Naraku asked as he roughly threw her to the ground before recalling his tentacles, "I do not know what it is about you. Sometimes your fear and screaming irritates me so, but other times I find it quite delicious. Either way you have nothing to fear. I'm not going to punish you merely wished to make a show of it. How I handle you in public and how you'll be handled in private are two very different matters."
Naraku's young daughter was still shaking seeming unable to trust him. He didn't like it. It had been true she angered him, but the smack across the face he presented her with had worked that poison out of him. He didn't need Kagome to love him or believe he was a perfect father, but he needed her trust and loyalty. If he lost her he had no children in his corner for when he made his move. Perhaps she had forgotten that her marriage to Sesshoumaru was only going to be temporary.
"Correct yourself," he ordered, "I'm not going to hurt you anymore Kagome. This time I swear it, but you should watch that tongue of yours. I don't look kindly on someone exposing to an outsider how much of that bandit I still carry within me. I understand what you're going through. I've been there. You have that voice in your head telling you to steal to for revenge or thrills don't you? You try to ignore it and overcome it, but you fail and fall to your dark nature every time."
Kagome wasn't falling for Naraku's words. He didn't bring her alone in a room to sympathize with her. If he had any sympathy he would find a way to break off the engagement with Sesshoumaru and protect her from him while she returned to her normal life. It didn't seem that was going to happen.
"How did you think I would act?" she asked keeping her eyes glued to the floor the whole time, "I have no control in anything anymore. I'm not falling to a dark nature I just wanted to feel something. Something other than this. That Sesshoumaru mocks me and makes me feel like an idiot and chains me up to remind me I'm property. That's what you brought me into and now you want to try and tell me how I feel?"
"Endure it," Naraku's words were harsh as he learned of Sesshoumaru's treatment, "and when I am done with you I want you to fall to the floor and beg for his forgiveness for being what you are. I need him to trust you and for him to lower his guard to you. Did you forget why we're doing this? Did you honestly believe the act I put on of disinterest during your plea in the throne room? Kagome it was no lie. You're marrying Sesshoumaru for the purpose of killing him. He wouldn't be expecting it and with those savage dogs out of the way my reign can reach past the sea and even further. Our reign."
Kagome had almost pushed her father's earlier offer out of her head thinking it was nothing more than the rantings of a mad man. He wanted her to marry Sesshoumaru and kill him? It just couldn't be a real expectation.
"Him searching your room and having your dirty laundry exposed works to our advantage," Naraku presented a small case on his desk that he slowly began to open, "I have a gift for you. Now that he believes to have seen all of your belongings he wouldn't expect to see you with this."
Kagome watched as the case opened and saw a magnificent dagger. It looked like it was made out of a fang rather than steel, but had much more than just a sharp tip. There were jagged teeth all down the bottom and the top. If someone were stabbed with that it'd do a lot of damage to more than just what you were aiming for. Killing someone with a weapon like that wasn't fair play it was just cruelty.
"Pick it up and see how well you can hold it," Naraku urged her with evil in his eyes, "if it's too heavy alterations can be made before you leave with him."
Naraku was taking advantage of his loose tongue Kikyo had scolded him for. He wasn't going to throw Kagome away on a whim and a hope that the curse his witch of a wife asked for would work. He certainly didn't want to wait two years just to be proven right or wrong. Instead he'd urge his daughter to do the deed herself.
"No," Kagome said immediately refusing to go anywhere near that blade, "don't even joke about that kind of thing or talk about it anymore. I'm not killing Sesshoumaru. I can't."
"Of course you can my dear. This blade will pierce a demon's skin no problem even one as powerful as him. No one said you needed to come up with a well thought out assassination plan. You'll probably end up finishing him in self defense I reckon when he one day hurts you. Once a dog has a woman she becomes her bitch and he'll justify any cruelty he inflicts upon you. You can make that hurt go away."
"Sesshoumaru is cruel to me, but he has never laid a finger on me to hurt me. You're the only one who has. Over and over again, just because you put your ill treatment of me on hiatus for years doesn't mean I've forgotten or forgiven you."
Kagome didn't exactly know why her father use to hurt her and cut her, but she could recall being a little girl scared and terrified that she was going to die feeling her own blood all around her being the only warm thing as everything grew cold.
"You are mistaken in whatever you feel like you remember Kagome, but trust me Sesshoumaru will hurt you once you are his. He is only behaving and holding back because you aren't his yet. You'll take this blade with you and carry it always. You'll need it. Once the deed is done I'll have you brought right back to your home where you can have the life and control you wanted. It's a promise and I'm a man of my word."
"No!" she shouted at him this time, "I'm not a killer father and I never will be. I can't do it."
"Kukukuku," Naraku chuckled as a mischievous smile appeared on his lips, "not yet. Kagome there is darkness in you. Remember I understand what you're going through. Onigumo did not become a great bandit overnight nor did he become me on a simple whim. At first he stole to survive and then like you he stole for revenge to feel a sense of control against those that mocked him and judged him. After a while he stole and manipulated others just for the thrill of it and then began to kill just for fun. You're already on the path. I can see that now. It won't be much longer now you just need some encouragement to give into those urges of yours."
Kagome refused to believe that and regretted saying she did what she did because she was his daughter. Her actions were wrong, but her heart wasn't shrouded in darkness like his was. She would never fall that far. He didn't want her to have that blade to protect herself against Sesshoumaru. He didn't care what happened to her at all he just wanted someone else to get the blood on their hands. Onigumo might've been a killer, but Naraku was not. He relied on trickery and stolen demonic power to get where he was not actually putting in the stomach churning work himself. He'd probably let her take the blame for Sesshoumaru's death and be executed not even shedding one tear as he went on his way to plot his next move. Kagome was not at all going to let that man tempt her.
"Besides you have killed before Kagome," his voice had returned to that of an abusive man, "have you forgotten about your dear frail mother and what you did to her?"
He was just trying to hurt her now. More echos of the past were disturbing Kagome's mind as she recalled him and that strange female who always gave her sweets berating her for killing her mother. It obviously wasn't her fault that her mom died in childbirth, but when she was younger she'd been convinced she was born bad and that's why the gods didn't make her as strong as her siblings to punish her. It had never been a good feeling and because of it she let her father do whatever he wanted to her without telling anyone about it. She thought if she had his love the gods would forgive her for what she had done.
Her father was trying to force her back into the mindset of a young child to better control her. Didn't he realize he'd already done enough damage? Kagome hadn't understood until meeting Sesshoumaru just how sheltered and ignorant of the real world she was. Naraku had controlled her education so he was to blame for how naive she was. Had it all been on purpose? Did he want her to be a stupid brainless princess that could be used?
"I was just a baby," she tried to tell him with confidence to show she wouldn't be bullied by him anymore, "I didn't do anything. I didn't ask to be born. Don't throw that at me and expect to bring me to heel. I'm not that little girl anymore."
Naraku grimaced. He hadn't truly expected that route of manipulation to work. None of it seemed to working, and that had been why he needed to get a dig at her. He was losing control of his Kagome and for that someone needed to be hurt.
Taking a breath he decided to let it go. As long as he made sure Kagome had the dagger he was sure it would be used. Sesshoumaru was no different from him. That dog was just after her for her blood, and the only way to shed one's blood was hurt them. He would hurt her and eventually this new headstrong Kagome of his would stand up for herself in the most lethal of ways.
"There is another thing I'd like to give you now that your vast treasures have been confiscated," Naraku spoke in a softer tone as he revealed to her a silver bracelet with many emeralds in it, "this belonged to your mother. She wore it on our wedding day. You should keep it and wear it on yours in her favor."
Kagome reached for the bracelet. If he was telling the truth it'd be nice to have something that belonged to her mother, but wear it on her wedding day? That wasn't going to happen. Kagome didn't know anything about her mom or what kind of person she was but she wouldn't dishonor the woman that gave birth to her in that way. The wedding was only going to be nothing more than a play to Kagome, and even if it were real and she didn't mind marrying Sesshoumaru she wouldn't wear something given to her by her father after creating a plot filled with betrayal and blood.
"It'd be nice to have," Kagome's tone was cold as she inspected it, "but it won't match my dress. Green doesn't go with blue and yellow. Those are the colors I know he likes me in."
Naraku had said something to hurt her and in return she said something to disturb him. She could see the job was done when his face turned into that of a scowl.
"Change of colors and a change of loyalty I see," Naraku spoke low, "you best show him how you feel then. Earn his trust by falling to the ground and apologizing as I told you to. I'll know if you don't, and you won't like the results."
He was already back to threatening her. She'd been right in assuming his promise to never hurt her again was yet just another lie.
As Naraku had promised Kagome's trophy room had been completely compromised. Sesshoumaru would no longer have to force her to decide which valuables she was to keep and which ones to leave behind because they were all being taken away. They would probably be sent to the treasury to be catalogued before being melted down and sold to grow Naraku's wealth. Guards tore apart everything to look for gold and gems before packing it up and leaving a mess of random silks littered all over the floor.
"The princess isn't going to be happy," Sango sighed doing her best to organize all the silk and put it away properly now that there was room available, "she wouldn't even let those closest to her come in here and help organize and now all these men have torn it apart."
"None of it was hers to begin with," Sesshoumaru said harshly making sure to keep his senses locked on her scent to know she wasn't being abused, "why is there no interest in the silk? It must have value if she stole it."
"Some of it might've been stolen," Sango explained shaking her head, "but most of it is just scraps. She used it when she use to do charity work. It's expected of most princesses to do things for the people. Now it's all just here gathering up dust. It's a shame."
"Charity work?" Sesshoumaru seemed surprised.
Indeed it was expected of women in Kagome's position to represent the family to the people with charitable actions, but with what he knew of the girl and how sheltered she was he thought she'd just choose laziness and luxury over any sort of work.
"The weather is mostly warm here, but there is that occasional snow fall once a year and most of the poor aren't prepared for it. They'd rather spend what little they have on food and their children than warm clothing to be used only a few times a year. Kagome use to go out during the snowfall with her tiara on her head and give the people cloaks she'd sewn herself with these nice patterns. I think it's probably the happiest I ever seen her."
"What made the girl stop then? As you said all these silks are just around gathering dust."
Sango shook her head mournfully, "There was a really bad winter a couple years ago and Kagome was just a hopeful thirteen-year-old thinking she could really help people that time around. Unfortunately a lot of people were upset as there had been a bad harvest with a lot of cattle dying. People were starving and looked upon the royal family with envy and hate. Kagome thought she could go out there with her cloaks and try to help people, but instead got attacked. I and the other guards intervened before she could get really hurt, but the damage was done."
Sesshoumaru had a feeling the story had a worse end than Kagome just getting a couple of bruises. Something had happened to stop the girl from doing something she seemingly loved that wasn't as self absorbed as all her other activities. Was his Kagome truly pure? Sesshoumaru didn't want think about some poor hungry commoner having his way with her and getting something he wouldn't be able to claim for himself.
"Well an example was made," Sango explained, "no one knows exactly who hit the princess but people can't just think it's okay to assault a member of the king's family. Everyone who was out there shouting obscenities and took apart of the riot was executed. I can't question the judgement of a king, but Kagome believed the action to be unfair and no one deserved to die because of her. After that the people stayed far away from her and she was cautioned to not call attention to herself when going out. She blamed herself for those deaths and gave up what she liked doing. That was when the stealing truly got out of hand, but it didn't feel right confronting her about it until now."
Sesshoumaru thought on it, "The key? You returned it to me, and Kagome knows you did it?"
The maid gave a nod, "You said the best I could do for her was to tell her to behave and know her place didn't you? I tried."
"A disgraced demon slayer maid giving orders to a princess," Sesshoumaru's tone showed how ridiculous the notion was, "it was what I asked of you but I did not think you'd take it that far. Why is that princess worth you risking your place and head?"
"The king speaking on how he is going to correct her and you and your devious lessons. You all wish to snuff out who that girl is. It's not right. I told her it was her duty to just accept the marriage and be obedient, but I can only hold my tongue for so long. She's already been losing pieces of who she is growing up in this family and I don't want to see the last remnants of her kindness and hope snuffed out by the two of you. If that happens what else will be left of her?"
"Hn," Sesshoumaru's eyes showed disinterest despite him putting thought into it, "only thing I wish to snuff out of that girl is her child-like ignorance and her constant defiance of me. She can keep the rest. It doesn't matter to me."
Another thing he wanted to get rid of was that constant scent of fear. It wouldn't be proper in their marriage bed.
Naraku had claimed he was going to 'correct' her, but maybe too much damage had already been done to her by the spider. Apparently with everything else squeezed out of her all that was left of her was a bratty princess that stole things to make herself feel better. It seemed Sesshoumaru had to correct that creature's correcting and truly grow her. He didn't want to play the role of teacher for too long, especially when her main purpose to him was providing him with that blood of hers, but if it was a necessary venture he'd take it. Unlike Naraku he'd allow the girl to grow and change for the better not for worse. He'd get her out of the web she was stuck in.
"Lord Sesshoumaru," Sango spoke to him again while rolling up another piece of fine fabric, "why haven't you told Kagome about me? You threatened me and said she'd be better without my service yet when we were all together you pretended to know nothing about me. What benefit do you get out of hiding what I am?"
The dog demon's fangs showed themselves as he released yet another one of his rare smirks, "That was not a threat slayer. That was a challenge. Even if you are just a mere human I haven't had a fight like the one you presented me with in a long time. I wouldn't mind taking you on again and shredding through that skin of yours. However, my bride to be would probably blame herself if I'd found you due to this arrangement so it's best to keep it between us. I do hope you take me up on my offer soon."
Sesshoumaru was expressing his desire to kill Sango and he was acting as though he'd presented her with the deal of a lifetime. She quickly dismissed her earlier thoughts about how Kagome and Sesshoumaru might not be the worst match for the way he spoke easily reminded her that under those kimonos and knowledge of royal etiquette was a bloodhound waiting to strike.
Kagome had enough of her father and would much rather prefer the company of the bloodhound since she had so little choice in the matter even if it meant having to kneel to him and being chained up again. She'd gone on the walk of shame through the royal keep hoping her siblings would say nothing about the morning drama and fresh bruise on her cheek. Unfortunately that plan was ruined when she'd come across queen Kikyo, who looked as quiet and cold eyed as she often did. Kagome couldn't help but wonder if her father was cruel to her to and exactly how cruel he'd been to the wives before her.
"Kagome?" Kikyo sounded concerned when she saw the bruise upon the girl's face, "what happened to you? Are you okay?"
Kikyo's voice showed concern, but the evidence of assault wasn't what had the queen worried. She noticed Kagome had just left Naraku's study. What did that damn spider have to say to her? Was he meddling again? She knew his faith in her was less than it had ever been, but he needed to just let the curse do its job and stop interfering with Kagome's path.
"What did he do to you?" she wanted to know exactly what had transpired between the father and daughter.
Kagome's first instinct was to lie and say she was fine so Kikyo wouldn't worry about her, but she then recalled how disinterested and cold the queen looked when she plead to her father for mercy and freedom. There was also that rumor Sesshoumaru had told her while disguised about the queen and InuYasha. Since it came from Sesshoumaru she was sure it had to be fake and probably wasn't a real rumor at all, but just the thought of it had Kagome upset.
"You don't care," Kagome made sure to tell her, "you didn't care when he was selling me to a stranger like a prized cow and you don't care now. Just leave me alone my queen. You made it clear I'm not even worth your pity."
Kikyo narrowed her eyes and took on a stern tone, "No you stay right there. We need to have a talk Kagome. I know I'm not your mother, but she isn't with you anymore so someone needs to help you. I can be that person. You need to know what to expect on your wedding night."
"I really don't want any talk about that. You know how I feel."
"That you'd rather be dead? You are too dramatic for your own good and that's why your father treats you that way. He punishes dramatics with dramatics. You know that. Kagome you're a princess who has lived a very privileged life and for that there is a price to pay. Yes Sesshoumaru is a stranger, but you could have worse. Following through with an arrangement you had no say in is your duty. It's just best to accept it and live your best life from there."
Sango had warned her yesterday she needed to know her place because Sesshoumaru could be dangerous, her father told her she'd end up killing Sesshoumaru in self defense because he was going to hurt her, and now Kikyo was telling her to just live her best life? It seemed she was out of the loop on what she was dealing with.
"I'm a princess and there is a price to pay," Kagome's eyes hardened as she thought about how InuYasha had used the same terms, "I can't do anything about it about it, but I at least deserve some empathy. I clearly won't be getting any from you my queen because you've never been in my position. I'm sure a proposal from my father was more like a demand since he is the king, but at least you were free once."
"Oh? Is that what you believe? I'm just some commoner that had freedom and lucked into this?"
"I never mentioned luck. I doubt anyone lucky winds up married to that creature."
"Be mindful of your tongue Kagome. I've not been in the same position as you I've been in worse. Where I grew up I was born a slave, and not the kind in the harsh sun laboring all day for a king. I was raised to be a pleasure slave. You'll only have to go through the experience of being treated like cattle once, but that was most of my life. I had no say in who claimed my innocence or who used me and how they used me every night. I don't wish to speak on it anymore, because I don't want your empathy. I don't want you to ever having to imagine living that life."
If Kikyo's tale was true than Kagome couldn't even put herself in those shoes. She was being sold off to a stranger, but at least she was getting a good idea of who that stranger was. There was a possibility Sesshoumaru could one day hurt her, but he hadn't done it yet and at least he would be taking care of her and the children they had together. No paying customer would do that.
"I'm sorry Kikyo," Kagome shook her head, "I didn't mean to make it seem like I'm the only one in the world suffering. I'm not that ignorant. I'm just scared feeling as though I'm left with nowhere to go. Even if the whole Sesshoumaru issue were to just disappear I'd still be trapped by another man I fear."
"You're not trapped Kagome," Kikyo shook her head, "on your wedding night you'll be expected to give yourself to this Sesshoumaru fully. He will have the right to touch you and take you how he sees fit and will probably continue to do so until you've provided him with a couple of heirs. That is what is expected of you, but your situation is not the same as other princesses. Do you know what the difference is?"
"I know that he's a demon and I'm pretty much human. I really will be powerless in the whole thing if I don't just accept it."
"That's not what I mean. The difference is this marriage wasn't arranged for Sesshoumaru. He sought it out. He wants you Kagome and that means you have a lot of power. I'm sure a cold creature like him will try to tell you how to obey him and what you need to change about himself, but it's all just an act. There isn't just one Sesshoumaru in the world I've met plenty of men like that. They are weak. They want you to be something made in their image because they are afraid the real you will reject them. All you have to do is not reject him anymore and instead embrace him. You do that you'll have him at your beck and call and he'll never treat you like your father does. Just give it a chance."
Kikyo thought she left Kagome something positive to think on. Hopefully it would be taken as good advice, and it was for that was how Kikyo was able to handle and manipulate a creature like Naraku for so long. Of course, the glimmer of hope she gave the girl was for her own benefit. She wanted Kagome to get over her fears and go across the ocean with that dog without anymore issues. The sooner she got away from Naraku's influence the better. Kikyo didn't care if Kagome or Sesshoumaru found any affection for one another she just wanted the demon to have her and enjoy her blood until the girl's seventh birthday. Once she and Naraku reclaimed the girl she'd tell them what the dog's secret to magic extraction was and nothing would stop her from pursuing her true destiny.
Kagome did feel a bit better after her talk with Kikyo and knew she was being cruel with her inability to forgive the woman. Of course she did nothing to speak up for her. How could she against Naraku? Kikyo was just a mere woman after all in Kagome's mind.
The girl returned to her room where Sango had ordered her out. She was trying to shield Kagome from the ransacking that had happened in her storage closet as well as remind her she was to be in Sesshoumaru's custody during the day unable to freely roam the castle hall's. It was better to just endure the burn and go to the man instead of having him hunt her down later.
The empty throne room had been where Sesshoumaru was waiting for her. He stood upon a small flight of steps right before Naraku's throne still holding the Tetsusagia in his hands with a mere cloth to ward off the barrier.
"Your dramatics have wasted what could have been a productive morning," Sesshoumaru was cold to her as he often was rather than giving her a proper greeting, "I had no intention of being involved with this wedding planning but since I am your generous husband to be I've intervened on your behalf. I arranged a late day appointment with your castle's seamstress and have decided this place might be the best venue for the ceremony if you will have it. The hall is quite wide and can easily be used for the reception as well if you desire one."
Sesshoumaru just needed something to go on about and taunt her with not caring how she felt about his effort and decisions in wedding planning. He was reaching for anything to distract himself from the bruise Naraku's assault had caused. It had been a hard smack that Sesshoumaru was unable to do anything about, but something that marked her face and made her look like another man's strike dummy upset him.
"It has to be now," Kagome told herself, "you do owe him an apology even if you're too stubborn to make it sound sincere. He'll probably see right through me having to kneel to him, but it's what father told me to do and I know that spider has a way of spying on me. It works into my plan anyway. I have to convince him I'll behave."
"My lord," Kagome bowed to him dropping to her knees, "you are generous in picking up in the slack where I have failed you. Your decision in using this hall is a grand one I fully agree with. I'm unworthy of your kindness. especially after you saw the darkest part of me. I'll never act below my station and commit immoral acts again. Not when I am so fortunate to be sought out by a man such as yourself."
"Amusing," Sesshoumaru blinked, "how can such a talented thief be a such a horrible liar and manipulator? I do not know what is more offensive to me, her always questioning my ownership and power over her or this display? I can get use to the sight of her on her knees and bowing to me though."
Sesshoumaru took a couple of strides closer to her before placing a hand gently on the top of her head, "You will not stand when you address me this day but you will speak as though you were given the freedom to step up to me as an equal. What part of that speech was true Kagome?"
"I knew he wouldn't fall for it!" she closed her eyes in anguish, "how was this supposed to earn his trust father? Forget it. Why am I taking that man's advice? I'm not going to manipulate him and I'm certainly not going to kill him. I just have to get along with him and see where it goes."
"I am sorry," Kagome spoke truthfully, "about stealing that key and InuYasha's sword. I hope you give it back to him I know what it means for him. I'm sorry but I really can't promise you I won't do it again. When I get nervous I do things like that without thinking about the consequences. I'll try to get better, but the most I can promise you is if I do it again I won't reject my faults anymore. I'll return whatever I took from you and apologize just hoping you will forgive me. Please just look past it okay?"
Sesshoumaru took in her words and appreciated them. She was admitting her own faults instead of just assuming his.
"Honesty is what I want from my bride," he told her with a calmer voice, "but we won't be just looking past them. These issues of yours is a part of you. What I want is you so if it means embracing this immoral part of yourself I will embrace it. Kagome do you recall what we discussed in the tavern? Those disgusting rumors about your queen Kikyo?"
Why was he bringing that up of all things?
"You shouldn't speak out loud of those kind of things in a place like this," she warned him incase she was indeed being spied on.
"The rumor is not what I wish to discuss but where the subject lead us. You made it clear your thoughts on a wife's loyalty and how even though she might not have married for love she owes it to her husband to never betray him in that sort of way. Were those feelings true? Will you be loyal to me despite not loving me?"
There were no lies in Kagome's answer, "Yes. Even if I'm scared of being sent off to live with you in a place foreign to me you're the one who will house me and take care of me. I won't do anything that'd offend any trust we'd build or your honor."
"This talent of yours," Sesshoumaru eyed the Tetsusaiga referring to her theft, "I can embrace it as I said and you'll no longer have to feel guilty or disgusted by it. All I ask is that you keep in mind your proclamation of loyalty and instead of ever using this talent against me use it in service of me. That is how you will regain my trust. Can you do that Kagome?"
Kagome looked up in shock. That part of her she was being told was wrong and undesirable was something he wanted to embrace? Sesshoumaru was asking her if she'd embrace it herself and steal something for him? That hadn't been what she was expecting when he brought up the subject of loyalty.
"If that's what my Lord wants," she told him knowing she couldn't say no, "and if it's in my means."
"You've shown me that you have the means already," he told her while lightly stroking her hair, "it might not be today or tomorrow, but when I'm ready I need you to perform. You'll show me your loyalties Kagome."
(End Chapter)
AN: I hope all these scenes of Kagome and Naraku and a little backstory of what her childhood was like sheds a little light on my portrayal of her. Luckily I haven't gotten any reviews claiming that she is out of character or anything, but I know she can sometimes come off as a bit bratty and only concerned with herself. That is on purpose. It's been a long time since I've written Kagome as a fifteen-year-old and I see this as how she'd act given the circumstance and now obvious lack of education. She'll change throughout the story as the point is Sesshoumaru will allow her to grow in the right ways and in the process grow more himself as well as fall in love with her.