A/N for 2018-12-14: This week, life was much, much kinder. I am grateful. There was even the gift of time, and energy to write on multiple fronts. Hoping this chapter carries the story forward in a way that's worthy of all your encouragement so far.

~ Erin

Rosalie had been right. Bella's truck was dead.

Looking under the hood herself, she was confronted by its very seized parts.

"See there, and there?" Edward asked, pointing. "Those should be able to move." He sighed, looking at her, that worried dimple between his eyebrows. "It can be fixed, but it will mean rebuilding—"

"No," Bella said. She'd had enough experience with seized engines with her mother. There'd been two before Bella had figured out the importance of oil changes, and begun to schedule them on her own.

She chided herself for not checking the oil pan. Jacob had warned her about it when she'd first moved in town, mentioning it was close to needing replacement.

After rubbing her face with her hands, she sighed and closed the hood. "Rebuilding is way more expensive than just buying something second-hand."

Edward snorted.

"There's nothing wrong with second-hand," she mumbled.

"No," he agreed, softening his voice. "Except you don't need to buy anything." He'd looked around the garage. "Use one of our cars."

"I can't—"

"Use one of the cars from your foster family?"

She flushed. It seemed so easy for them to offer, to help, and to give—and she had nothing, really. Not until she turned eighteen and could inherit her parents' modest estates. That they kept offering more, left her feeling indebted and imbalanced in the relationship that was growing in size and scope.

"You've already done so much for me, Edward, and your family—"

"Hardly."

She shook her head. "I'm not even sure I want to know how much you paid for my freedom, not to mention Sally's, or what your family's spent to furnish a room for me, or buy clothes, or—"

"Why does that matter to you?" Edward asked, his hands massaging hers, as she leaned against her truck.

"Because you have done so much for me, and I have done nothing for you. And you continue to do so much for me, it feels like I'm amassing a debt I will never be able to repay."

Edward sighed, pressing one one of her hands to his chest. "Before I met you, everything had become a steady grey. There were blips in it, but life was . . . bleak. I had my family, yes, but," he shrugged. "I didn't have much in the way of happiness, and I certainly didn't have joy. Then I met you." He smiled, that stunning manifestation of crinkled eyes that bewitched her every time it appeared. "And it was like walking into a world full of colour. It was being alive—fully. So when you say we, or I've done so much for you—no. You're wrong. I'm alive to the world because of you. I can't ever repay this. And this—" he waved his hand around the garage. "These things, money, material help—it's nothing. We've had years to amass a wealth we'll never be able to use all of. Trust me, Alice tries." He chuckled. "It's just money. But you—us, life with you. If I can do anything to make your life easier, I'll do it." He punctuated all this with a soft kiss to her forehead.

She chewed on his words, and then her lip, trying to see his side of things. "That's—really hard to just, accept."

"That I love you?"

"No," she said, "That part I'm good on." She smiled up at him. "The I-give-you-so-much part." She didn't elaborate. They'd had this part of the conversation before. "You are all . . . perfect."

"No. We're vampires. We may look that way, but we are not. Don't ever forget that, Bella." His voice was weighty. "Not perfect. Simply a way to lure prey. Nothing more."

"Well I am very effectively lured then."

"Does that mean you'll stop feeling badly about receiving help?"

"No."

He sighed, and smiled. "Alright. What do you want to do with your truck?"

Now her face twisted a bit. "I think the scrap yard is probably the logical place for it." She was trying to figure out how she was going to get to school, wondering if she could get a ride with Carlisle.

"Is that what you want, though?"

She thought about it for a bit. "No. I'd like to see if Jacob wants it."

She could tell he hadn't expected this answer. His carefully managed, "Alright" demonstrated as much.

"Do you think Carlisle can give me a ride to school tomorrow?" she asked next.

"I'm sure he could, but he'd probably say no."

Bella looked up at him, her forehead wrinkled with confusion.

"Because he'd know that I would want to drive you."

"You want to be my chauffeur?"

"Oh no, I'd like to be the man that loves you, driving you to school." This time she met his lips, interrupting their planned trajectory to her forehead. "In fact," he went on, between their kisses, "I'd pretty much do anything to be able to spend time with you."

"Anything?"

"Almost anything," he murmured.

Her chuckle was deep and throaty. "Good to know."

In the morning, when they walked to the garage, hand in hand, Edward held out the keys to Bella. "Do you want to drive? Get used to it?"

"Do I need to?" she asked.

"Well, it's probably the car you'll be driving, if you need one." He grinned playfully, "Unless you want to take the Vanquish?"

She snorted. "The Volvo looks great." With less confidence, she accepted the keys.

There were more buttons and things to pay attention to in the Volvo than her truck, and she took a few minutes acclimatizing herself to them.

Patient as always, Edward waited, watching. When she turned over the engine, he smiled. "You're quick, for a human."

Rolling her eyes, she shifted it into gear, and began the drive to school.

At the school parking lot, they walked to the main building's steps. "Are you up for some adventuring after school today?"

"Adventuring?"

"Baseball."

"Like watching a game?"

"Nope," Edward said too cheerily. "Playing."

"Um—"

"Well, not you playing. More you watching us play."

Her shoulders relaxed.

Thank God.

"Sure? Is there a special occasion?"

"Not really, but there is going to be a thunderstorm"

"And you want to be out in the open, attracting lightning bolts?" she asked incredulously.

He grinned. "Near town, but not where we'll be. There's a nice clearing where we go. Big."

"Baseball. In a thunderstorm."

"Beats homework." Then he stunned her completely, leaning in to leave the ghost of a kiss on her lips. "See you after school."

She shook her head, watching him walk away, and then turned to get herself to class.

On the way to third period, Angela flagged her down, and pulled her into a small alcove by the corner stairwell.

"Hey, Bella, you know Sally's birthday is coming up, right?"

Her guilty look spoke first. "Oh, um—"

"It's OK, it's at the end of June, but I want to do something nice for her."

"How can I help?"

Angela beamed. "I thought you might ask. I was thinking we might have a girls night sleepover at our place? You know, pizza, movie, pedicures. Cake and ice cream."

"That sounds wonderful. What do you need me to do?"

The barest details discussed, they both rushed to their last classes, agreeing to call each other later for more planning.

Bella was thoroughly engrossed in wonderings and plans when she came out of the school building.

The sight of Edward, leaning casually against the Volvo, a dry-cleaning bag over his back, finger curled around a hanger, made him look like he'd stepped out of a fashion shoot.

"Ready?" he asked.

"As I'll ever be."

"I think you'll like it," he reassured her.

He drove this time, and when they pulled onto a smaller service road, it was to park by what Bella recognized as Emmett's jeep.

She eyed this much larger vehicle more nervously. "You're driving this, right?"

"Yes. Though I'm sure Emmett wouldn't mind you playing with his toy."

Bella imagined Rosalie would, though.

"I'll take a pass," she said, climbing in, then paused, looking at the complex harness that stood in place of a seat belt.

"Here," Edward said, leaning over, quickly snapping the buckles together.

They were metal, and clanked.

She sucked in a breath, and reminded herself of where she was, and who she was with.

Her hand still startled when his brushed by her fingers.

"Sorry," she mumbled.

Edward just shook his head, eyebrows nudged towards one another. "You OK?"

"Yeah," she said, making herself nod, "let's go."

It was another twenty minutes before they reached the end of the road.

"We're on foot from here."

"OK," Bella said, unhooking herself, and slipping down from the car.

Then Edward held his hands out behind his back.

She kept her "Oh," quiet.

She didn't object to the proximity, but the last time he'd carried her, her stomach had become an oozy mass. Her hand travelled there now.

Edward looked back.

"I almost forgot."

He went back to the jeep, and plucked the dry cleaning bag from it. "For you."

It was a baseball jersey, pressed perfectly, which he held open for her.

"I'm just watching, right?"

He chuckled. "Yes."

After she slipped it on, she accepted the inevitable, and took the proffered place at his back. "Slow, OK?"

"Human slow, or vampire slow?"

"Human fast."

It was a fast run, but at least she could see the things that were passing by.

The rest of the Cullens were there when they arrived.

Edward stopped a little ways from them.

"You still OK?" he asked softly.

"Yes, thank you."

She hadn't let go, and tightened her grip again, burying her face in his chest. The reach of his arms mirrored hers.

It felt right. Being with him. Like relief to an old ache.

"Come on you two!" Emmett called. "No more smooching on the baseball time!"

Edward's shirt absorbed her snort.

Esme tucked Bella behind her, with a wry smile, and a, "Call 'em as you see 'em, Bella."

Emmett tapped a metal bat into his palm. It made a clunking sound. "Ready?" he asked, looking at Bella.

"Sure, Emmett," she grinned back.

She wasn't though, for what the Cullens considered baseball.

The first crack of the bat explained the need for the thunderstorm. It went on just as loudly, and Bella was enjoying herself by the time Rosalie was called out, running into second base.

Edward and Alice froze, the ball whizzing by them.

There was a quiet murmuring and then the Cullens were in front of her, the shape too reminiscent of what it had been with the wolves. Only, this time, Edward gave her a silent, "shhh," finger pressed to his lips.

Again, Carlisle stood at the forefront.

This time, it was a pair of human-shaped bodies that emerged from the trees, moving rapidly towards them.

Their ruby eyes were shocking.

The pair stopped a good distance away.

"Baseball," the blonde woman said, "I told you!" she smirked at the man beside her.

He tipped his head towards her in acknowledgement.

"Apologies for intruding," the tall man murmured. His hair was dark, shoulder length, loose in the evening breeze. "But we were intrigued."

"Of course," Carlisle said politely. "I'm Carlisle. This is my family."

"Your family?" The woman asked, tone too colourful. Her gaze swept over them.

"Yes," Carlisle confirmed. Again, he was polite, but nothing more.

The woman made a sound not unlike a grunt, and then spoke. "I'm Danica, and this is Carl. Mind if we join in a game? I haven't played one in—well, a long time." She grinned.

The expression was terrifying, and Bella's body reacted as most human bodies would: with a shudder.

The garnet eyes snapped to her position, and suddenly the clearing was loud with bristling, hissing forms.

"She's human!" the woman spat.

None of the Cullens spoke, letting defensive postures articulate their intent.

"And she knows," the man-Carl-growled.

"Not your concern," Carlisle's clipped voice called.

"Everyone's problem, that kind stupid move. You sending written invitations to the Volturi, too?" Danica's voice was a sneer.

Edward was moving closer to Bella, so that his body almost eclipsed her, hands sliding down, ready to pull her onto his back.

She wanted to yank away, rattled by what was happening, reverting to her instinctual self, but Edward's hands were cold vices. "It's OK," he murmured quietly.

It was definitely not.

"Oh my God," Carl said, watching Edward, a look of disgust on his face. Then, to all of them. "What is wrong with you?"

"Nothing," Carlisle said, "but if you think that way, perhaps you should leave. And not hunt on the peninsula."

"That's a lot of land to claim, even for all of you," Danica growled.

They were all still semi-crouched, like cats, ready to spring.

"Would you care to test our claim?" Rosalie spat back. "We have no problem defending it."

"Rose," Carlisle said, voice a warning.

Danica was opening her mouth to speak, when Carl beat her to it. "Let them have it. It'll be empty soon enough, when the Volturi come to clear them out."

"No," Carlisle said, when the pair disappeared, hand held up. "Alice?"

Everyone turned to look toward her. She shook her head. "They're going. I don't see anything, with the Volturi, or us." There was a flicker across her face, and Bella caught Edward's grimace.

They'd be hunting somewhere, Bella supposed. She wondered where.

Edward released her hands, turning and placing them instead on her back. "You're safe," he said, but it sounded more like he was trying to reassure himself of the fact.

Bella nodded. "I am." She looked at him, and more certainly, said, "I'm fine." She was, despite seeing what she thought she'd seen. "They're not—they're not like you, are they? Their eyes—"

"No," Carlisle answered her. "They feed on humans."

Bella swallowed, nodding, preparing for her next question.

"And, who are the Volturi?"

Carlisle was watching Edward though, who was staring past Bella, eyes focused on something she couldn't see. Or fathom.

"Why don't we go home, before we get into that particular conversation?" Carlisle gave Bella a small smile.

There was a distant flash, and then a low rumble of more thunder.

Edward held his arms out wordlessly, and she accepted the invitation, rattled by his unusual silence.

The drive home was much more subdued, and when Edward passed the parked Volvo, Bella said, "wait, don't—"

"No," Edward blurted out, "someone else can get it. Getting home is more important."

"What is it?" Bella asked.

He only shook his head, refusing to say more.

Bella was feeling hurt and confused by the time they walked into the house, Edward's stony silence persisting.

The family was sitting around the dining room table, clearly waiting for them.

Edward's hand pointed her to one of the empty chairs.

Carlisle began speaking, answering her question without preamble. "The Volturi are the self-elected rulers of our kind. They keep the peace, and order."

"OK," Bella said, waiting for more.

Rose snorted.

Bella watched as Edward shot her a warning look.

"I don't think that pair will alert them, but we need to be prepared if they do. Alice will warn us, but it will mean leaving."

"Leaving, why?"

"There's only one rule for our kind, really," Carlisle said, his voice still soft. "Keeping our existence a secret. Not drawing attention to ourselves. It's why we're so careful."

"But you have—"

"Not from you."

"But I wouldn't say anything—"

"Of course you wouldn't," Carlisle went on. "But that wouldn't matter to them. We'd need to leave, and go somewhere very remote, and without human contact, for some time." Here he looked at her, and then at Edward, his face full of sadness.

Glancing at Edward, Bella saw his face was still rigid.

"Why?" Rose said, "If she's made her choice. It's what Alice has—"

"QUIET ROSE!" Edward roared, standing,

Bella jumped in her seat.

"WHY?" Rose shot back. "So you can delay the inevitable? Give her, what, a few more days, months, maybe years, before you take her life away? Don't think she deserves to know that?"

"THAT IS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN!" he yelled.

Bella had never seen Edward like this, and while he didn't frighten her, the raised voice made her body remember things she'd rather it didn't.

There was the familiar shake in her hand. She gripped the chair edge, and said, in deliberate syllables. "What do you mean by that, Rosalie?"

Rose's gaze didn't soften when it turned towards Bella, but there was a pinch of sadness that crept into the wrinkle between her eyes. "Alice sees you like us. She always has."

She had? Bella looked towards the women she'd come to consider a friend, heart lurching at what felt like betrayal.

"Yes," Alice confirmed, voice small and quiet, "but decisions change, Bella. It isn't fair to say what I'm not certain of."

"Do you still see it?" Bella asked.

Alice nodded.

"That is not going to happen," Edward said, much more softly, his hand reaching for Bella's.

"Why not?" Bella asked, still gripping the chair.

There was a collective intake of air.

Bella looked around, taking in Edward's stricken face, and then the mixture of feelings seated at the table.

"I mean, maybe it happens because it's my choice," Bella said, directing her trembling words to Alice.

Rosalie stood. "It would hardly be your choice. He took half of that as soon as he walked into your life. You've as much choice as a family pet." Then she turned and walked away.

"Just ignore her," Edward hushed.

But Bella stood too. "I don't think I can. Excuse me."

"Bella—" His hand brushed hers.

"No." She yanked it away. "I need to . . . think."

She avoided the bed in her room, electing for the small armchair by the window.

How long had they all known? Since Edward had met her?

And he hadn't told her.

She understood Rosalie's feeling—bitter as it was. But Edward's—didn't he want her?

The knock at the door made her start.

If being like them would make that stop, she'd welcome the change.

"May I come in, please?" It was Carlisle.

"Sure." It was his house. She felt more tenuous than ever, her difference from them stark and ugly now.

Carlisle perched on the edge of the bed, fingers laced together, as he looked at her in concentration. "That shouldn't have come up that way. I'm sorry. We all are."

She nodded in acknowledgement, but not forgiveness.

"You must have questions. About what might happen. About the Volturi. Or what Alice has seen."

"What has she seen?" She looked at him, hoping for the truth. All of it.

"She said she's seen you, here, like us, in the forest. In a very particular place. But she doesn't know when."

So she must've looked much like she did now. This possible change couldn't be so far off.

Carlisle held her gaze, waiting on her response.

"And you don't want that for me." Their faces had been clear on that front.

He sighed.

"None of us made the choice for this life, Bella. It was only by accident that I was changed. Edward was dying, Esme, Rosalie, and Emmett barely alive when they were changed."

"And Alice and Jasper?"

"Alice doesn't remember. She has no memories of her human life. Jasper was made—well, I'll let him tell his own story. All of us would give almost anything to be human again."

Bella snorted. "Being human isn't' feeling so good right now."

"But it won't always be that way."

"You sure?"

The shift in his face said he wasn't.

Her hand trembled, and she clenched it into a fist.

"And the Volturi? If they come looking?"

"We'll need to leave."

"How long will need to be somewhere remote?" she asked, a sinking feeling in her gut telling her she already suspected.

"Decades."

Decades. She suspected that was a polite way of saying her life-span.

"But not if you change me."

"I won't sacrifice your life to spare mine, or ours."

"Is that what it would cost, if they find out I know? Your lives?"

"Very likely, yes. Or yours. Or all of them."

"Or you change me."

"We're not there, Bella. We might not ever be."

"Might," she said.

"Yes, Might."

Bella's fingers rubbed against the chair's rough upholstery.

"I'm so sorry, for how I've complicated your lives."

"No, please, don't be. You've made Edward so happy—we have nothing but joy for your presence."

"Not all of you, Carlisle."

His lips pursed. "Rosalie is—she's struggled to adapt to this life, Bella. That isn't your fault. We all feel the loss of our human lives in different ways. Hers is just much more pointed."

Edward's knock at the door made Bella look up. His face was visible in the space between the door and the frame.

"Can we talk?" he asked now.

Carlisle had already stood. "If you have more questions, Bella, I'd be pleased to answer them."

She nodded, but the only questions she wanted answered were from the man she loved, and he was looking more anxious than she'd ever seen him, standing, and waiting on her.

"OK," she murmured, and then stood, wanting to face whatever else she needed to know on two feet, unsteady and human as they were.

Disclaimer: S. Meyer owns Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.