In the spirit of the Suits coming back to our screens this week, enjoy Ch 7 - named conveniently after the most fitting Darvey song
Ch 7 – Waves
But there, is a light
In the dark, and I feel its warmth
In my hands, and my heart
Why can't I hold on?
It comes and goes in waves
It always does
She tries her best to pull herself together as she stands there alone in the bathroom, facing herself in the mirror. She wipes the tears from her cheeks and thinks back to how they could have possibly ended up here. She should have told him sooner, maybe they wouldn't be in this position if she had, but it was too late now, and she could only think of one way to fix it. She had to tell him to truth.
She closes her eyes and exhales, thinking back to that day that Thomas came to pick her up from work and found her having drinks in her office with Harvey.
"What did you have to tell Harvey?" she asks as he joins her in the car
"Oh, just some last-minute details for the deal" Thomas brushes off and reaches over to place a chaste kiss on her cheek
"You two seemed cozy" he adds, referring to the situation he walked in on in her office
"Just celebratory drinks with a friend, nothing out of the ordinary" she replies, looking out the window at the city lights they moved through. It's silent for most of the ride and she almost misses it when he mumbles a comment to himself.
"Hmm. Friends" he hums
"What is that supposed to mean?" she asks as they pull up to the curb outside of her apartment and she steps out of the car
"Oh, common Donna. I've seen the way the man looks at you, and you except me to believe you don't see it too" he exclaims, rounding the car to stand opposite her on the side walk
"I… um…" No, she hadn't noticed. Did Harvey really look at her that way? He told her he didn't want more, surely Thomas was mistaken.
"Look Donna, I've heard the rumors and I've never asked you before because I trust you. So, I need you to be honest with me when I ask you, have you and Harvey ever been romantically involved?"
She studies his face, his muscles twitching with tension and anticipation as he waits for her to answer. She contemplates lying but figures there's no point, he's already picked up on her bitter mood and pin pointed that Harvey was in some way responsible, what was the harm in telling him about the past.
"Yes"
"It was once, 13 years ago" she adds quickly, as if to downplay the extremely complicated relationship her and Harvey have shared over the past decade.
"And nothing has happened since then?" he questions
She falls silent and stares down at her shoes. One of the things she admired most about Thomas was his confidence. She knew he must have heard the rumors and she appreciated that Thomas never asked her about her relationship with Harvey. He never questioned the closeness, much like her past boyfriends had and she thought maybe she'd finally found a man who was mature enough to look past her friendship with her former boss.
"No" she mumbles to the ground, lying through her teeth
"Answer me this then, do you have feelings for him?"
She can't look up because she knows one look at her will tell him what he already knows, she has and always will have feelings for Harvey.
"That's what I thought" Thomas answers his own question at her refusal to even look at him
"Then I think I only have one thing left to say here, if you want this thing between us to work, you can't be friends with him anymore"
"What are you saying?" she looks up and finally takes in the man in front of her; the put together, handsome business man who had become a frustrated mess, clearly at war with his emotions towards her relationship with Harvey.
"I'm saying you need to pick, me or him"
She knocks on his door three times before giving up when no one answers. She panics, trying to rack her brain and think of where he might have gone.
She spots him sitting at the bar, nursing a glass of scotch, head in his hand. She walks up behind him and he lifts his head, somehow knowing she's there; a weird ability they both seemed to have.
"We broke up" she states
He turns and looks at her confused.
"Harvey, did you hear me?" she tries
"When?" he asks coldly
"Last week, after we had drinks in my office" she admits
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't think it would matter. You said you didn't want more!" she exclaims
"So, you let me beat myself up over crossing the line with you, when you haven't even been with him this entire time?!" he yells back
"I didn't know you were doing that! How was I supposed to know it was bothered you when every time a conversation about US gets the slightest bit real, you panic and shut me out!" she calls
"You're the one who said you didn't feel anything when you kissed me!" he yells, rising from his seat so he's at eye level with her
"I lied Harvey! Obviously, I felt something. I felt everything" she admits
He pauses at her admission. He'd never considered that she could have lied about the kiss. Their yelling is drawing attention to them, as other people at the bar are staring at the pair that is still dressed to the nines and screaming at each other.
She's heated now, angry at him for making her feel like the bad guy, when he's the one who still has yet to tell her how he feels. She once again laid down her cards, telling him she felt everything when she kissed him and here he was standing right in front of her, not saying anything in return.
"What a shock! You have nothing to say! Surprise, surprise, Harvey Specter shutting me out when things are starting to get real! Screw you Harvey! Sorry I put myself out there, sorry I'm willing to risk everything and apparently it's for nothing!" she exclaims and storms out of the bar into the lobby
He follows after her and grabs her arm just before she reaches the elevator and twirls her around to face him.
"Donna, wait…"
"What Harvey!" she snaps, a tear slipping out of her eye and rolling down her cheek. He hates to see her hurt like this, and he hates even more that he is the one who hurt her. He wishes she'd told him about her breaking up with Thomas. He could have been there for her, comforted her as a friend. He could have made a move sooner and showed her exactly what she's meant to him all these years. He knows he better speak up now and lay it all on the line before he loses her forever.
She pulls her arm out of his grasp and raises her eyes to meet his.
"Why didn't you say anything?" she whispers back
"Because you were with him and it wasn't my place to"
"I wasn't with Thomas for months after that happened! Why now?! Are you just saying this because I was unavailable?" she says, tears still falling, as she tries her hardest to still her shaking hands
"I'm not saying it because of Thomas, I'm saying it because it may have taken me years to figure it out, but I finally figured it out" he exhales
"Figured what out?" she dares to ask
"THAT I LOVE YOU DONNA!" he yells, drawing the attention of the nearby visitors moving through the lobby, and including the attention of Louis, Shelia and Samantha who happened to be making there way through the lobby from the bar after their night of fun.
"What's that all about?" Louis turns towards his peers
"I'd say that's been 13 years in the making" Samantha smirks as the group turns their attention back to their screaming friends.
"Love me how?" she squeaks out, barely above a whisper
"You know how" he answers, stepping closer to her and sliding his hand down her forearm until their fingers are interlocked
"No, I don't!" she cries, pulling away once again and turning back on her path towards the elevator
"Donna" he calls after her
"Why now? I need to know. What took you so long to say something?" she turns back and calls at him
"Because we worked together. And I was your boss. And I couldn't lose you. I can't lose you" he mumbles, unable to get his thoughts in line and his words out clearly, he knows he's rambling and not telling her what she wants or needs to hear, but he can't formulate a proper thought his pulse is racing so fast.
She turns and storms toward the elevator, feed up with this never-ending cycle. They clearly weren't getting anywhere, and this loop was just breaking her heart.
"Donna, wait just listen to me"
"Why?! Because you were my boss and I have too?" she spits, his comment clearly hurting her more than he meant it to
"Donna"
"You've made it pretty clear that our working relationship comes first, so what is it Harvey, what could you possibly have left to say to me?" she sighs in defeat
"I love you"
"How many times do we have to go down this road?" she sighs as he steps towards her, once again closing the gap between them
"I'm in love with you"
"You're just afraid to lose me"
"I am. But that's not why I love you. I love you because you're incredibly hard working, you're the first and last one at the office, and you're the first person I want to tell when I win a case. And you use that stupid multi-coloured pen. You're the only person who isn't afraid to call me out on my bullshit. You're always the most beautiful women in the room, but you don't even know it. And you are the only person I want to spend the rest of my life arguing with" he smiles, using his finger to lift her chin so her tear-filled eyes meet his.
"I'm sorry it took me so long to figure it out. And that it took me so long to be ready, but I am now. I want it all Donna. I want more. I want everything"
She smiles up at him timidly at first, smile growing as he reaches to wipe the tears from her eyes, "You're in love with me?" she whispers
"Hopelessly" he whispers back before pulling her in for a long-awaited kiss. It's eager, both of them desperate to deepen the kiss as her hands wind there way around his neck and he loops his through her hair.
"Well it's about damn time!" Samantha calls out at the pair, causes them to break apart and blush, suddenly both very aware of their public display. The elevator dings and Harvey takes Donna's hand and pulls her inside, the door shutting behind them. Before she has a chance to say anything, he has her pressed against the elevator wall, tongue seeking its way past her lower lip. They're so caught up in each other they barely notice the elevator ding, indicating they're on their floor. Harvey scoops Donna up and carries her out of the elevator, causing her to giggle as he places a trail of kisses down her neck while walking her towards his room.
Once inside he presses her against the closed door and begins kissing her when she puts a hand on his chest and pulls back.
"Harvey wait" she whispers
"What is this? What are we doing here?"
He smiles and takes her hand, leading her to the edge of the bed where he takes a seat and motions for her to join him.
"I meant what I said Donna, I want everything, with you" he grins, causing her to cheeks to momentarily turn the colour of her hair
"Everything" she repeats
"Yes. Now if my girlfriend doesn't mind, I would really like to kiss her again" he says hopefully
She can't hide the smile that illuminates her face when he refers to her as his girlfriend and she leans in for a kiss.
Harvey wakes up to a steady stream of sunlight pouring in from the window on the opposite side of the room. He has half a mind to get up and close the blind but he can't bring himself to leave the bed, not with her in his arms. He looks down at her, legs tangled between his, red hair sprawled across the pillow. How did he get so lucky? He can't believe the surprising turn of events of the night before, but he couldn't be happier with how things worked out. The events of the past few days made more sense to him now, she really did want him to kiss her in the pool because she was no longer with Kessler. As bitter as he was the night before about her failing to tell him about her relationship ending, holding her in his arms now, he can't help but forgive her. Maybe she was just as afraid as he was, because if he was being honest, her telling him about her break up would have made the reality of him needing to tell her how he felt come a lot sooner, and perhaps it wouldn't have worked out the way it did.
She begins to stir in his arms before her eyes flutter open and he places a gentle 'good morning' kiss on her forehead.
"Last night was…"
"Ya" he agrees, knowing she means long overdue, incredible and the best part of this trip.
He begins to twirl a strand of her hair between his fingers, losing himself in thought. He knows he should focus on the beautiful women lying next to him, but there's still one question that's been nagging at him since he woke up, why did Donna and Thomas break up?
"What's on your mind mister?" she notices his daydreaming
He debates telling her, not wanting to make things awkward or uncomfortable, and decides if they're going to do this, and really do this, he needed to be honest with her.
"Why did you and Thomas break up?"
He expects her to get upset at his prying into her past personal life but instead she looks up at him and grins.
"He asked me to choose, between you and him, and I…. I choose you"
He reaches down and kisses her, not expecting that to be the reason, but also thrilled Thomas didn't do anything to hurt her.
"I promised myself I would put myself first from now on" she continues,
"I've been choosing you for the past 13 years. But when he gave me the ultimatum, something was telling me to choose you, just one last time, to have faith in you. And god am I glad I did" she grins into another kiss.
"Thank you, for having faith in me" he whispers
"Thank you for being worth having faith in" she whispers back as they resume kissing.
A phone starts ringing, as if on que, and annoyed he turns and answers it with a harsh 'what'
"Where are you?" Louis calls out from the other end
"You missed breakfast and we have a bonding event starting in 25 minutes! As a name partner I expect you to be there"
"Ya ya Louis I'll be there" Harvey mumbles back
"Oh, and Harvey, can you tell Donna I expect her to be there as well, seeing as you answered her cell phone" Louis adds before hanging up
Harvey puts the phone down on the table and lays back with a dramatic sigh, while Donna can't help but laugh at the conversation she just overheard.
"I guess we better get downstairs" she says
"I guess so" he pouts, "But what do you say I take you to dinner tonight?"
"Like on a date?" she grins
"Well that's what people who are dating do, isn't it?" he flirts
"It's a date" she grins, sliding out of the bed and heading towards the bathroom that leads to her room.
She pauses at the door and looks back at him, "What are we going to tell people?"
"Based on that phone call, and the unfortunate timing of our little fight in the lobby, I'm going to go out on a limb and assume they've already figured it out. I say we tell them the truth?"
"The truth it is" she asks
"Sounds good" he walks over to her to steal another peck before sliding past her into the bathroom
"What are you doing?" she questions as he turns on the shower
"Getting ready, care to join me?" he raises an eyebrow
"Who knew this shared bathroom thing would work out so well?" she smirks
"What is today's 'bonding' activity anyway?" he asks, sliding out of his shorts and into the shower.
"Water sports" she laughs, joining him in the shower.
Sorry for the slow burn but I hope it was worth the wait! I'd love to hear your thoughts on chapter 7!
Stay tuned for some more firm retreat fun, and some fluffy Darvey stuff, because who doesn't love a little Darvey fluff xx