Chapter Seven: Ivory

Where everything began to wither and wane with the way of winter, Nagisa found that his relationship with Rei was blossoming as though it were spring. In the month that came, they most frequented the coffee shop around their lunch times where together they reviewed inconsequential details of their days and worked on their crossword puzzles, often having to work hard to find certain facts about themselves in connection with the words they wrote. On Wednesdays, a day off that they shared, they would meet in the park and jog together, lightly chit-chattering about more personal matters - the blond complained many days that he hadn't been grocery shopping in months, and Rei would notice that each week, he still wouldn't have done anything about it. Though tentative as the furl of the first spring flower, they were content with this easy progression.

By the end of October, they had encountered no serious problems beyond light bickering due to competitions in their crosswords, though much to Rei's chagrin, this seemed only to work to Nagisa's advantage, who used it as flirtatious tension. Not that it seemed the brunet particularly minded, though. In order to spare his patience, however, the younger man kept it light and teasing, if not with an edge of triumph. Rei very rarely got the upperhand in such arguments, and when he did, the poor blond was known to pout his way to a deceitful victory. Rei once told him that he thought that Nagisa would have made an outstanding defense attorney if he'd tried.

The day after such an argument - something that had to do with some rule at his workplace - Nagisa had remained as sullen and pouty as ever, and frankly, the older lawyer was beginning to feel concerned that he'd actually upset him. He was rather put off and considerably quieter than Rei was accustomed to as they jogged along. Just as they crossed the ivory bridge, with his voice picking up the edge of curiosity, he asked of Nagisa;

"Is something wrong? You're a little quiet today." The smaller man panted and rolled his pretty eyes, dancing nervously around in place as the brunet slowed to a stop. At this response, he perked up. If anything bothered him, the extroverted young man only needed the one question before, like a needle to a balloon, he would pour out all his emotions in a single round.

"You're going to make fun of me," he complained dramatically, halting himself abruptly by a bench to stretch - it was high time for a break, this being the beginning of their second lap around the pond. Rei copied his movements, huffing at the lack of his partner's willingness to divulge the problem. Occasionally this response was routine as well, and so he promised sincerely,

"I won't. If you talk about it, we can fix it, can't we? But if you don't, then we can't." His tone was systematic and efficient, though his heart uneasily dwelt on the idea of an angered little blond. To his increasing apprehension, this had no effect on the typically happy-go-lucky man, who sighed sensationally and collapsed climatically down upon the cold, metallic bench.

"No," he whined, "you're gonna think it's just ridiculous!" The brunet sat beside him, taking his legs into his lap, genuine worry beginning to shine in his eyes. But no matter, for Nagisa disregarded this. He was certain that he'd be mocked by his staunchly organized attorney.

"If something's really wrong, then I want you to feel as though you can talk with me," the brunet confessed, his voice sincerely tainted with concern. Thus far, he hadn't been faced with a blond that was unwilling and the little one sensed his confusion with precisely how to deal with these reactions. Chilly birds shook their feathers and chirped to fill the hesitant silence.

"Well," he began tentatively, "when you put it like that, I guess it doesn't sound so bad - but no laughing, 'kay?" Rei nodded seriously, eyes trained on him as he leaned up and scooted closer. "So, I told everyone at work that I'd throw a party and they all remembered that it's this Friday, but um... I didn't." The brunet's eyebrows shot up in shock but he was interrupted before he spoke. "I know, I know!" Nagisa groaned, his stress levels rising from the simple look. "It was stupid. But it's just, I have work tomorrow and Friday and I just don't have time to clean my house or to buy things 'cause everything I have is expired or to clean or anything."

"Why didn't you just do it today?" Rei interrogated as the little blond slid off of his thighs. His arms crossed shyly as he rolled his eyes melodramatically again and pointed out his obvious reason.

"Because I wanted to spend time with you! I can't just cancel all of a sudden!"

"I would've understood," he replied easily, standing and offering a chivalrous hand to Nagisa. He took it gratefully, a soft grin tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Besides," he continued, a voice painted with great amusement, "I think you're really just putting off having to clean and shop." The blond whipped his hand away and, ever impressive, gave a sassy flip of his hair and roll of his pretty eyes. Rei laughed at the display.

"You said you wouldn't make fun of me! I'm actually like, really stressed!" he accused petulantly, turning away from his snickering date.

"I'm sorry," he apologized cheerily, "but if you'd like, we can do it together." When Nagisa looked back, the man's eyes were warm, like a cloudless summer night. His heart gave a warm flip at the gentle, admiring expression and they reached for one another's hands at the same time.

"Well, okay, if you insist," he teased heartily, giving Rei's hand a gentle shake side-to-side. So hand-in-hand, they proceeded onward together.

Rei drove them to a grocery store in a practical black sedan that Nagisa pinpointed to be several years old - perhaps a 2010 model at the latest, but he couldn't be too sure. It was appropriately and apparently well-used, but had been clearly been pristinely cared for so that it shone in a pleasantly good condition.

"Do you have a shopping list?" Rei asked him as they pulled out onto the street.

"Nope!" Nagisa admitted. "I usually just improvise based on my budget." The attorney slammed his brake slightly too hard at the red light, causing the car to lurch forward. Startled, the blond met the horrified gaze of his partner.

"You improvise? Based on your budget? " he repeated. Confused, the writer nodded. "Goodness gracious, I can't imagine a worse way to save money, or go shopping for that matter. No wonder everything in your fridge is expired. We're making a list. Right now."

"Right now?"

"Yes. " With a snort, Nagisa reluctantly pulled out his phone and opened a new note.

"Well, my milk's expired. And I think I'm out of orange juice. Oh, I don't have any eggs, and the state of my bread is absolutely concerning at this point, to be honest," he rambled, adding things to his list as they came to him. Rei nodded with satisfaction.

"I'm glad you're thinking about it, at least. Anything in particular you want for your party? You should add that to your list."

"Booze, gotcha. And sweets too, but I doubt I can find exactly what I want," he sighed. "I wish there was a Booths around." It was the store he'd grown up around: their attitude was friendly both towards their customers and their farmers, but they unfortunately operated only in the north. He'd been reduced to scouring these shelves for the best products he could afford at Sainsbury's or Tesco.

"What about Waitrose? If you're concerned about price, I can help you pay," Rei offered.

"Waitrose is way too expensive. And it's for snobs anyhow."

"But I shop there," the brunet stated mildly, pulling into a Tesco parking lot nonetheless.

"Exactly," the blond countered sassily, wringing a sharp laugh from the attorney, but still he offered up a charming smile to show that there was no harm meant in his comments.

Once they pulled into the parking lot of the towering supermarket, Rei was ever the gentleman, opening and closing the car door for Nagisa. The latter was adamant about searching for his childhood candies, to the point where the attorney couldn't convince him to at least find the items on his actual list. He was reduced to watching his younger date crawl along his hands and knees to search the bottom-most shelf.

"Get up off the floor, you look ridiculous," he pleaded, his cheeks dusted with an embarrassed blush. He glanced around to check if anyone was eyeing them oddly, but Nagisa was already aware that their aisle was empty. Not that it mattered, anyhow. He'd be doing this regardless and so in reply, the blond shook his head vigorously.

"I need to see if they have the same kind of candy like at Booths!" he protested, scanning each item thoroughly. He sighed in frustration and stood, not having found anything worth buying, save for a few miscellaneous bags of candy corns. It was nearing Halloween after all, why not add in some festivity?

"All right then, can we get back to your list? We could do to buy something actually healthy," he reminded his date.

"Okay, okay," he hummed contentedly, scanning it over. They collected fresh milk, bread, and half a dozen eggs. Rei had been sweetly conscious of his date's lesser budget all the while and, though he'd offered to help pay here as well, respected Nagisa's wishes in purchasing it himself. The little blond had begun to grow quite fond of him.

"Oh! I should get pecans and almonds for the party," he exclaimed, turning back to Rei. "I'm gonna roast them. My roommate in uni did that for me once - his family always sent him nuts 'round this time, so I figured I'd try," he explained delightedly, the recollection of toasty, sweet warmth buttered his heart even on the coldest of nights. "I mean, I'm not doing it today," he carried on, "'cause we like, have to clean and stuff, so I'll probably leave it for Thursday." Rei frowned.

"Don't put it off too long," he warned, passing the trolley off to Nagisa.

"Only if you don't be such a worrywart," he teased in a sing-song voice, taking a running start and pushing off childishly. He shot down to the end of the aisle, attempting to hum inconsequentially, pretending to ignore Rei's scandalized scolding. He giggled through his music regardless.

"Hey!" the brunet called, dashing down the aisle after him. "If you're going to do that, then be careful!" The blond's honey-sweet laughter, having overflowed through his faked negligence of his date's presence, danced back to him delicately. As he caught up to the slowing cart, they stumbled to an easier pace. The pair reached the snack aisle, clumsily snickering to each other, though a lower voice added in his chiming chides. They scanned the shelves, and the blond cautiously checked the prices, decidedly tossing the cheapest bags of nuts in the cart. "Now, wait a moment," the attorney scolded gently, examining the bags. "How much do you need?"

"I was gonna use about three cups each," he replied, curiously examining his date. "Why?"

"Well," he began thoughtfully, pushing his apple red glasses up the bridge of his nose, "if you do the math properly, you can save more money." He picked up one of the bundles and read the information thoroughly. "The almonds have about three and a half cups, and the pecans..." He pulled them out. "The pecans have five." Glancing analytically back at the shelves, the brunet easily calculated the prices. "These almonds," he commented, pointing to a higher shelf, "sell more for what would be less. There are, oh, perhaps six cups or so, so it'll save you money in the long run. Besides, what would you do with a half cup, anyhow?" He grinned impressively at Nagisa, eyes shining with the hope of praise, and the blond did smile, but shook his head.

"I would use it. The amount doesn't matter that much, you know." Taken aback, Rei's eyebrows creased like hands on a clock and, to the blond's great amusement, he practically whined, "I don't understand. With the candy, you were so specific, and you positively insisted on the prices that would save you the most money, but all of a sudden, you're tossing all of the detail around." Nagisa shot him a disbelieving glance.

"You really think I'm detail-oriented?" he inquired ironically, leaning against the trolley and observing the flustered man at his side. He had yet to take his finger down from where he pointed at the almonds.

"Well - I mean, I suppose I noticed - it's not that I assumed -" he stuttered, pulling away his hand to push his glasses up the bridge of his nose. "But whatever suits you, I suppose," he proceeded, his skin red with humiliation. Nagisa had won this round, it seemed, but his date's pride took a few hits. Nagisa sighed with a familiar gentle humor, and continued more sweetly,

"Thank you. The candy thing is more of a sentimentality than anything else - emotions trump everything with me, pretty much, and I'm a bit of a starving writer. I have to be picky with prices." The attorney removed his hands from his face as its color had gone down - save his ears, but the columnist wouldn't remind him of that fact. "Besides," he hummed funnily, "you missed one glaring fact, Mr. Lawyer." Never one to back down from the baiting of the blond, he demanded desperately, "And what's that?" Nagisa grinned.

"The three and a half cups are still cheaper." He rolled his violet eyes, perhaps in imitation of the younger man, and stalked off with the cart, claiming that it was high time they moved on, if they wanted to use their time efficiently. The snickers of his date trailed behind him teasingly.

Their shopping continued without a hint of a ceasefire between them, but as they drove past the park and into a small, suburban neighborhood, the backseat laden with groceries, Nagisa was well aware that no amount of his teasing would lead to victory. Rei parked along the drive.

"This is it, right?" he inquired, scrutinizing the one-storey structure intensely. Nagisa popped out of the car, suddenly nervous by the other man's relentless scanning. Uncertainly, he wondered how his house would appear in the brunet's eyes, who had been far more successful from an earlier age and, as he had come to learn, had been blessed with more privilege as he grew.

Nagisa supposed he'd found a nice place, what with his budget. It was nearly classic, but had taken on some of his charm, so to speak, despite not living there himself. There was a short sidewalk leading up to an off-center door on the left, and, hidden by a row of unruly flowers right beside it, were rectangular windows with diamond panes. In the sunlight, they glittered prettily - they had been what first caught his eye when he toured the house two years ago. On its immediate right, a bit farther out from door, were two plainer windows. Were his curtains ever open, they'd reveal the little bedroom inside. The house itself was an unremarkable brick construction, made unique by a smattering of wildflowers in front. Overall, with his subpar gardening skills, it appeared as though a child had taken a handful of crayons and colored all over a classic painting. Rei blinked at it a few times, decidedly both under- and over-whelmed by its appearance, and his date hustled to the porch.

"Ahh, come right in!" He invited hurriedly, cheeks a rosy red, as it had been impolite of him to stand there gawking at his own house. The brunet thanked him and following his lead naturally, removed his shoes at the door. "So, erm - what do you think?" When Rei turned his neutrally analytic gaze to Nagisa, the blond found himself jumping to say, "I mean, it's definitely small and I'm not too great at keeping the flowers in tact - I mean, I don't even own this house - but it's got an okay yard in case I'd erm... want a dog or something." He'd finished off lamely, rubbing at the back of his neck and chewing on his lip slightly, and the brunet gave an amused huff.

"I'm not sure what I was expecting," he explained, "but I think it suits you, really." There was a brief moment in which Nagisa relaxed, but it didn't take the infallibly efficient man a second to proceed, "So what do we need to do first? After we put away the groceries, of course." Right. The outside may have charmed his date, but from here on out, the poor writer didn't stand a chance to win any praise. Without waiting for acknowledgement, he approached the tiny kitchen to the side and swung the refrigerator door open. His face curdled like the milk Nagisa had yet to throw out and he gagged slightly while tossing it shut once more. His watering eyes found the young man rubbing at the back of his neck and his eyebrows ticked inward. "We have our work cut out for us," he stated, flat and plain as day. The blond shrugged halfheartedly.

They started by pulling everything out of the fridge - empty eggshells were tossed in the compost, spoiled milk was thrown in the outdoor trash, and it was apparent that very little was salvageable. Just as well, too, for Nagisa was sure he needed a fresh start. He searched through the damp area beneath the sink ("A plumber will have to look at that eventually," Rei had commented) and pulled out his cleaning materials triumphantly.

"Found 'em!" he chirped delightedly, waving a blue bottle at the brunet.

"Excellent," he praised, tossing a rag from the bathroom at Nagisa. "You can get started on wiping down the shelves, and I'll get started cleaning out the pantry. When you're done, start putting away what we bought, all right?" His partner nodded, squirting an excess of the product on the towel - he was sure to need it - and slapped it down on the uppermost shelf, standing on his toes in order to reach the back with his fresh, soapy hands. He ran it under the sink when he'd finished with that level, unusually pleased with himself for his work. True, he was being helped and he hadn't instigated anything, but it relieved him to finally be getting his chores done , rather than simply remarking on it with each passing day. And, he noting with a glance at his hardworking date, he was happy to be working with Rei, the clatters of groceries, ceramic plates, and squeaking rags filling the silence as opposed to his own aimless chatter. All the talk could frankly be exhausting, though he enjoyed the lawyer's company thoroughly, and this day of work had been quite the blessing. The blond grinned pleasurably as he dumped more blue cleaning soap onto his towel and began work on the second level, now able to lower himself from his toes.

"Do you want me to get that top shelf for you?" Rei asked, glancing over from where he was pulling out a stale, two-year-old cereal box and some jam he had yet to open.

"Nope!" Nagisa hummed, capably adding, "I already got it!" They caught one another's eyes and smiled. "Thanks though! You're really the best!"

"No problem," Rei offered quietly, pausing in his work as he watched his earnest partner work. His excitable face brought an easy, comfortable grin to Rei's face and before he realized it, the blond had finished.

"Huh? What're you looking at, Rei?" he addressed him, causing the attorney to pop out of his trance.

"Oh! Nothing, I just took a break," he defended, flustered that he was caught in the act of staring. Nagisa pouted, his eyebrows astoundingly mirroring the funny twitch that the brunet himself was known to have.

"Not fair!" the blond whined, reaching a hand into the grocery bag and beginning to restock his refrigerator. "Look at how much work I did while you just sat around and watched!" he joked, causing his date to jump up, all bothered by the accusation, and work twice as fast as he had before, grumbling lowly at the 'preposterous allegation' Nagisa had so offended him with.

They worked peacefully on the kitchen for the remainder of the hour and the bathroom certainly didn't take long - aside from organizing Nagisa's jewelry drawers and makeup, it was spic and span. They'd elected to leave the living room for last, and so what remained was the blond's disastrous bedroom.

"How on earth do you even sleep in here?" Rei mused aloud, staring at the base of the mountainous clothing pile that stood as high as the bed. The floor couldn't even be seen for sweaters and boots and jeans alike. The open closet was empty, barren hangers twitching darkly from side-to-side while opposite from it, the curtains whipped in the half-open window.

"Funny you mention," Nagisa began to reply queasily, meeting the man's dumbstruck blue eyes, "I've been sleeping on the couch lately. Just most of the time, though. Sometimes I sleep here. Occasionally."

"I can't believe you," he exclaimed, throwing his arms up in a gesture of surrender. "Your refrigerator, your kitchen, your bathroom - those were doable, but you've allowed this - this monstrosity to take over your room! It's forced you out of your own bed!"

"All right now, that's enough of your drama," Nagisa retorted testily, bending over by the door frame to begin picking up clothes. "Just knock everything onto the floor and then on the pillows, we'll stack pants, in the middle, we'll do skirts and dresses, and on either side of the end, we'll do blouses and cardigans. Got it?" Rei nodded, rolling up his falling sleeves, as they leaned down to sort through the clothing.

"Shouldn't we be washing these?" he asked after a lapse of silence.

"I'll be the judge of what's dirty and what's not," he maintained, though only to avoid the fact that he'd forgotten to buy more laundry detergent.

They spent nearly three hours fighting their way through the dark jungle of chic clothes. All that littered the floor now were measley, weak corpses of long-forgotten accessories (Nagisa had wondered where that scarf went!). Rei halfheartedly suggested that while they were working so hard, they might as well deal with what was left, but, exhausted, the blond waved him off and they stumbled to the living room, collapsing upon the couch. After checking the time on the mantle, the writer rolled himself off of the couch and stretched.

"It's about time for a bit of tea, isn't it?" he commented, strolling tiredly to the stove and filling the kettle with water. He opened one of his cupboards and glanced through his selection. "Let's see... I've only got black and green. What would you like?"

"Black's fine," Rei replied, softly adding, "Thank you, Nagisa." The little blond smiled.

"It's not a problem."

They lapsed into a tired silence, shadows of the diamond panes falling past the kitchen and spreading out over the living room, scattering glittering gold jewels across the floor. Dust drowsily faded in and out of the yellowed sunset. Where he awaited the water's boil, Nagisa's hair was set an astounding rich flame, like a flickering beacon in an otherwise still painting, brushstrokes faded over time. His cloud-like, rosy eyes sought Rei. The attorney was completely still upon the couch, where he was bent over something - perhaps a book - and the only sign of life was the dust that fell away around him. The shadow of his fingers hesitated upon a page, quivering with a sort of question. Ivory light danced off his glasses and he blinked, offering the only movement that suggested he was not in an age-old photograph.

"Is this your father?" he murmured, fingers shyly brushing an old memory. Nagisa stepped forth, into shadow, and his light faded. The book in Rei's hand was a photo album. He turned each page of the past with a gentle hand and a want of understanding and the photos, years old, were tinted golden with age. Nagisa returned to the brunet's side and crossed his legs behind him, nestling himself beside the man.

The attorney had found the picture that captured what was perhaps one of the more profound moments of the blond's life. The polaroid contained a boy, at around thirteen years old, with an awkward grin displaying glistening braces and a shiny chin, and wide, bright eyes framed by a hoop of wavy yellow locks that could only be described as "2002". The flash had made him appear rather startled and distinctly uncomfortable. At his side was a salt-and peppered man, bent forward at the knees, smiling in a resigned fashion as he gripped his son's shoulders. He was dressed in a military uniform. The surface of the photo was quite odd, but the memory accompanying it still choked the boy as well as a large, dry pill. At last, in reply, Nagisa affirmed Rei's suspicions.

"Yeah. That's me he's got in his death grip." As though he'd received some sort of permission, the brunet lowered his fingers to brush the surface of the photo.

"You look so young," he whispered. "You can't've been more than twelve here, right?"

"Just turned thirteen, actually. It was taken in September of 2002." Rei's brows twitched in concentration and his eyes narrowed, as though a closer look would somehow discern everything that meant about his date's childhood, rather than just asking the boy himself. The writer took it upon himself to explain. "It was the day he was deployed to Afghanistan." He cast his eyes away from the picture and focused on everything else in the room - anything to keep him away from the memory. He found cinder-strewn logs in his fireplace, glowing chrome with the last light and proceeded: "He gave me a really nice gold necklace right before that was taken - I'm wearing it in the picture, you know. He shouldn't have bought it, he really couldn't afford it, but he did anyways. I still have it. Wear it all the time." When Rei again examined the picture, he noted reddening eyes, wide and glimmering with held-back tears, and a forced, painful smile. His cheeks and chin were wet.

"I see," he hummed sympathetically. He allowed Nagisa a moment and remarked, "Most of these pictures are just of you and your father. Why aren't your sisters in any of them? You mentioned that you had three. And your mother?" From across the room, a shrill whistle sounded, indicating a boil, and Nagisa rose, snorting with bitter laughter.

"My parents got divorced a long time ago." He hustled over to the kettle and removed the top, pouring a couple cups as the last of the orange glow gave way to grey. "Mum and Dad used to live close together, but Dad was always in the military so when he had to move to Japan, I went with him. Mum didn't even care." He poured the remainder of the scalding water down the drain without a moment's thought that they might need more later and tipped some sour lemon into both cups. "Then, after a few years, we came back to the U.K. and all of a sudden, the attacks in the U.S. happen and by the next year, he was off to Afghanistan. Then two years later, Mum gets remarried to a real piece of work, and give another two years, I run off to uni," he explained, a pain beginning to needle his throat, as he set the cups of tea down, allowing them to clatter against his coffee table gracelessly. "And just last year -" But he cut himself off, folded his arms with a huff, and dumped the boiling black tea down his scorching throat, in hopes it might soothe his unshed tears.

"What?" Rei pressed gently, wrapping his fingers around his cup. "What happened?"

"Nothing," Nagisa mumbled, angry that he'd gone and spoken so much. "Just drop it." In the ashy fireplace, he could imagine the proud, gleaming flame. Surely it too was ashamed of what it had left behind, a shell of its former self. His father could not endure that humiliation in front of Nagisa, let alone anyone he loved, and so his son fought hard to spare him from it and Rei, taken aback at the boy's harsh tone, pulled his hand away from the photograph. With a quietly safe edge of humor, he replied:

"What, the tea you've made for me? I would never." And Nagisa gratefully clung to his arm, ignoring the echoes in his memory of 'don't go, Daddy' that sounded thunderously after the photo's flash.