The next day was the same story. Almost the same story. "Chapter 2. There will be no need to talk," Professor Umbridge told the class.
"Do we need to think?" James asked while raising his hand.
"Yes, Mr. Potter. I believe I asked you not to disrupt this class again," Umbridge prowled towards him. "De-"
"You aren't raising your hand, Professor!" Sirius reminded her, while thrusting his own up.
"I suppose Mr. Black will be joining in your detention. Tomorrow night, my office. We will talk then." With that, Professor Umbridge walked away coolly. At the end of the lesson, she reminded them that their essay was due the next day, along with giving them homework. "Two rolls of parchment on Expelliarmus! To be handed in on Friday."
Again, Sirius complained, "Why won't she just read it herself? It's not that hard to read a chapter…."
"She has other classes to teach," Remus pointed out.
"Bloody homework."
"It could be worse," Remus pointed out.
"He has a point," Peter nodded.
"Please shut up," Sirius moaned grumpily.
"I'm good," said a very casual Remus.
"James, can you make them shut up?"
"No. I've tried before," James replied quickly.
"When?"
"Well… There was the time when I tried to vanish Remus's spell books. I tried to transfigure Peter into a potted plant. Then there was the time when-" James went silent. "It's her," he whispered. Eyes wide, James grinned at his friends. "What do you think?"
"No. Definitely not," Peter said quickly, backing up a little. "She scares me."
"Bloody chicken. All right, what are we doing?" Sirius asked eagerly.
"Nothing. I'm going to lunch." With that, Remus hurried off to the Great Hall.
"Me too," Peter followed.
"Anyway," Sirius turned his attention back to James, "You carrying any dungbombs or something?"
"Nope. Guessing you have nothing?" Umbridge was walking steadily closer. Her eyes locked on the boys and she quickened her brisk pace.
"No. What about a jinx?"
"It's not like we can Lumos her, honestly Sirius."
"What about-" Umbridge was now before them, glaring down at them.
"And what are you boys doing standing in the middle of the hall?" she asked the pair.
"Nothing."
"Are you sure, Mr. Black, Mr. Potter?"
"We should know what we're doing, Professor," James pointed out to her.
"The thing is, I believe that you are lying," Umbridge said, a faint smile on her lips.
"I'm not lying at all," Sirius told her.
"No?"
"How do you define lying?"
"When someone, such as yourselves, is not telling the truth," Professor Umbridge replied, emphasis on 'telling the truth.'
Sirius looked somewhat confused and stated, "Oh. I define it as laying in a horizontal position." James nodded, trying his best to hide a laugh. He coughed instead.
"Get out of my sight," Umbridge commanded them angrily.
"Absolutely."
When the boys got to lunch, Peter and Remus were almost finished, and lunch was almost over. "What did you do?" Peter asked eagerly.
"Sass. Mate, the sass was real," James said proudly. He now allowed himself to laugh.
"Please don't tell me you did something stupid," Remus said exasperatedly.
"She asked what we were doing. We told her nothing. Of course, for some strange reason, she wouldn't believe us. I told her we couldn't be lying as we weren't laying down," Sirius summarized quickly, grinning.
"It's not laying, it's lying."
"Who cares about grammar?"
"Teachers. The ones that give essays. Speaking of essays, the History of Magic one has to be turned in in 20 minutes. We have to get to class."