What had he been thinking? He should have followed his first instinct and simply told the girl no. It was Athena who had to explain in detail how Rene had manipulated him. Adama had found himself telling her everything when he came to deliver the news that Apollo and the others were long overdue.
His only daughter had become a trusted advisor over the yahrens since the destruction, especially in matters where he had to make a difficult decision against his conscience. Her opinion was valued. She had not understood why Apollo, now a full Colonel and commanding a battle cruiser, had been sent away on a mission, so Adama had taken her to his office and explained the events, beginning at the sealing, ending with the shuttle of women and children arriving from Caprica, and the vipers that escorted the shuttle disappearing back into oblivion.
"It is the oldest trick in the book, Father! Ask in front of your parents to go to the party, and they won't say no because you are betting that your parents won't want to look bad in front of your friends. I tried it once with mother, and she knew exactly what I was doing. She said no before I was even done asking. How could you have given in? Starbuck and a sealing? He barely knows the girl. And how convenient that once sealed he gets to avoid all the consequences of such an act. He just zooms off to parts unknown, of course he was all for it. Father, it was a ploy, and she got her way. How could you have not seen it?"
It was the question he was asking himself now as he sat in his office and stared out his viewport wondering if any of the stars he could see were the star around Caprica or was it too far behind them now. He had lost his wife on Caprica and had not had the chance to bury her. Would he lose his oldest son there as well?
Why had he given in to such a foolhardy mission? Rene had told them nothing of her miraculous powers, hadn't even indicated she was still capable of doing anything other than pilot a shuttle. While dealing with Commander Dante and the survivors of Dilmun, he had no choice but to trust she could leap across space. It had been an easy risk at the time due to desperation and the distance was not so great. In retrospect, he hadn't actually believed she could.
But the proof was in their current location. He had assumed that the ability was somehow manifested due to the crisis and that after the leap of the whole fleet, had disappeared just like Count Iblis.
He still worried about Iblis and his intervention in all of this. Rene claimed she knew of this ability long before she was acquainted with the evil count, but that was all she would say. She kept her secrets and kept them well. He found himself now second guessing all of her actions and reactions. Her mental illness, her traumatic past, and her tumultuous relationship with Starbuck, had it all been tools that she could use to distract or manipulate those around her? She had certainly manipulated him. The pressure of the many faces around that table whose trust he wanted to gain had swayed him. Not only that, but the happy couple so intent on spending their honeymoon on a rescue mission to Caprica. It had played upon his emotions.
Plus it was not just any couple. It was Starbuck. He had found it hard to tell the man no even before all this. Despite what others saw, a callous rogue who womanized, gambled and took far too many risks, Adama had always seen through the young man's façade. Behind all his bad habits lay a dedicated Warrior who on more than one occasion had laid his life down for another without expecting anything in return. Starbuck was a foolhardy romantic at his core. He was a hero who had deserved every award and then some. The fact that Starbuck somehow survived every sacrifice he was willing to make was evidence enough for Adama that miracles still were possible in the face of defeat.
Had it been the trust he placed in Starbuck and his judgement of the man's character that had him giving in to the outlandish mission? Was it his desire to see another miracle on top of the one already witnessed that evening of a sealed Starbuck, happily committed to Rene and her family? Had Adama been too greedy? One blessing too many?
Perhaps, but it was not the young man's request, or that of the steadfastly reasonable and reliable Boomer. It had been the drawings. Adama had seen the horrors of the destruction first hand, demanding that Apollo take him to their home. What he had intended that night, even now he could not say. In retrospect, perhaps it was his attempt to join those who had already perished. It had certainly been a risk, one that now he would not consider nor would he allow another to make.
And yet he had. He had allowed Rene to persuade him to send several of his finest warriors, including his only remaining son, back to Caprica and into the belly of the beast. Even if Adama defied his own judgement about evading Cylon detection and wanted to send a rescue team, it was not possible.
Was it even possible for him to describe how much he regretted his decision now? Even the sight of the survivors who had so desperately needed saving, couldn't shake his remorse.
It was the drawings that had motivated him. Rene had seen into his dreams, the ones that had haunted him since that fateful night over three yahrens ago. Her ability was not just in folding space, as Wilker insisted that's what she was doing with the focused energy. The scientist had brought him examples and studies, as well as conjecture and theory as to what she was creating. In many ways, it was possible as the physics described it as simple as folding paper, and yet never accomplished before. How she could achieve such precise accuracy in location was beyond even theoretical conjecture. But at least that ability of hers was based in some science, beyond their own at the time, but theoretically explainable.
The drawings and the dreams defied logic. How could she have known the very images that occupied his subconscious? How could she have drawn them with such accuracy? She had only shown him a few that night, but after the shuttle arrived with the survivors from Caprica, Adama had entered Rene and Starbuck's chambers to search for some answers as to her abilities. Perhaps her chambers would offer a hope that they could get to Caprica and rescue his warriors.
He had to go no further than opening the door. He had no idea where she had appropriated the paint, but he knew where she had stolen the scenes for her paintings. The beach was where he and Ila had spent their honeymoon, and many vacations as a family on Virgo. She had captured the palm trees perfectly. The path in the woods painted on the opposite wall mirrored the one near Ila's parents cabin on Caprica. He found the sketchbook on the table and flipped through each horrifying image. Many he did not recognize, but as he moved further into the book, several he did. They were his nightmares of the destruction, his imaginings as to what had occurred once the Galactica had fled the quadrant. Rene's chambers held no answers, only more questions.
He understood why she felt compelled to return to Caprica. What he didn't understand is why he felt that compulsion as well? What answers could be found in going back to the scene of their ultimate betrayal and defeat? He'd hoped to find that answer when he had grudgingly said yes.
Now he feared he would never know. His Warrior's return seemed unlikely and Adama feared he would live out the rest of his days wondering why he had allowed the young girl to manipulate him into being such a fool.
Jolly had briefed him about the situation on Caprica once the shuttle had landed with the women and children. The shuttle had arrived at the fleet with two vipers as an escort, but the vipers had been swallowed up by the anomaly once the shuttle was within sight of the Galactica. Jolly's description of the planet and the Cylon presence had been bleak. Plus he had been quite clear that the team had been held captive by the survivors in exchange for more support from the fleet. Rene had negotiated the rescue of the women and children in exchange for more warriors from the fleet.
Adama would have liked to have made that decision, whether to send the help or to refuse to negotiate, but Rene had apparently not trusted the outcome of such a discussion. She had assumed his answer would be no, and perhaps it would have been. Perhaps he would have at that moment realized what a fool he had been to allow her to dictate terms and conditions where her abilities were concerned.
Perhaps he would have realized the severity of the situation, Starbuck and Apollo stranded with truly no hope of returning to the fleet. Adama suspected that Rene would have been extremely persuasive. Or maybe he could have used the declining of his faculties and the sentimentalities of old age as ample excuse for him to bend the rules one more time and send a whole squadron to retrieve his son and the man he considered to be like a son.
He knew now, with the prospect of never seeing his warriors again, he would have said yes. For once he felt he had the personnel to offer to such risky missions. In crude terms, he could afford to lose a few in the attempt.
But Lieutenant Rene had not given him the opportunity, and Lieutenant Boomer had followed. She had performed the ultimate manipulation by removing the decision from his control and now, they were gone, their return unlikely. In a way, she had saved him from being a fool twice. Once was maybe enough.
Rene had indicated that there were many survivors, but Adama had still been unprepared for the crowd of starving women and children that disembarked in his landing bay. Their health was dire and he cleared a barracks just for their care, placing them in quarantine until he had further answers as to their ailments and afflictions. Once he had been assured that most were not contagious, he had asked to speak to some of them.
A woman named Gia who appeared to be their leader had been more than accommodating in answering his queries. She spoke of surviving the night of the destruction at a remote location in the hills above Caprica City, her husband and young son having chosen to celebrate the armistice on a family hunting vacation. It had been a wise decision. They had survived as had many of their neighbors in the woods. They were prepared for an emergency having ascribed to a sect of a religious order that believed in having months worth of food and supplies in case of an emergency. They had interpreted the events in the book of the word as more of a prophecy of times to come, and a suggestion from the Lords as to how to ensure their race's survival. According to Gia, they had done well the first yahren, but the Cylons did not need drinking water nor clean air. The Cylons had begun to destroy the planet for human habitation and to strip it of her resources. They had poisoned the crops and the waterways.
"They didn't hunt us down, sir. They just removed anything we might use to live. We were running out of food and having to venture into the city in hopes of finding more when Rene showed up. I had dreamed of a young woman coming to save us, but I had no idea it would come true."
Gia's words had astonished him. He had somehow accepted that Rene could enter his subconscious thoughts due to their proximity. Her quarters were but the turn of a corridor away from his own. How in the heavens had she been able to cross the numerous light yahrens to enter the dreams of a woman she had never met? He resisted the urge to ask the woman how her dreams ended. He was afraid he would sound foolish. More importantly, he was afraid he knew the answer. In his own dreams, he watched Caprica burn as Rene lit the fire.
He looked out to the stars, wishing he had not been foolish enough to let a young girl manipulate him. But it was too late. All he could do now was to pray to the lords for another miracle, or at the very least, a dream that might hold the answers.