He slid down the ridge he'd been gripping back into the shelter it provided. For a brief moment, he pressed his cheek into the hillside before him, letting the dirt absorb the tears suddenly spilling from his eyes. Couldn't he just catch one break, was that asking too much? He drew in a ragged breath, choking on the smell of the rotting soil. Rene's ghastly drawings paled in comparison to what he had just seen. A terrible thought struck him as the image of little Lara popped into his head, only it was not a picture of the girl he knew, a vivacious creature who was quickly becoming a young woman. Instead it was an image of her younger, smaller, clothed in rags, and huddled with all the sewer rats for warmth.
He winced as he remembered back to that first night on the Galactica and the copper squadron settling down for the night, not in the bunks provided. Instead they had curled up in a big pile on the floor. He should have done something about that then. It had seemed harmless at the time, the group needed the comfort of each other after the loss of their friends and their home. But now he knew. Now he knew far too much.
Worse was the image that followed that of Lara, one of sweet little Kalea huddled with Kiff as centurions loomed over them. That was what the fences contained, someone's children freezing in the cold of the night. They needed him and now was no time to have doubts. He sucked in a steadying breath before he shook off the hold Rene had on him so he could turn to face his team. He knew the ridge at his back afforded some protection, but he was painfully aware of the danger lurking just beyond.
He gazed into the wide eyes of his wife and his friends. He didn't need to explain. They all knew the reality of what they faced. This was a well-defended base and Avery had been right to wait for help to take it. The captives would be unable to lend any support to their own rescue. It was a nightmare that the warriors may not survive. Rene and Jake looked to him to lead, almost begging for him to be able to change that reality. The weight of the responsibility pressed on his chest, making it hard to breathe.
It was Jake that broke the heavy silence. "What do we do?"
Rene answered before Starbuck could. "We get them out, that's what we do. How is the problem. But we have the training to figure this out, don't we?
Any other time Starbuck would have praised Rene for finally coming around to the creed and values that were the core of being a Colonial Warrior. But not this time. This time it was insanity to think they could pull this off. Yes, it was inconceivable to leave those kids to die, but would they all die in the process? He rejected the doubt for the last time because it didn't matter. He knew if he balked now, chose to scrap the mission for the safety of his team and left those children behind, it would eventually drive him insane, drive them all insane. He couldn't unsee what he had seen. They were kids, young and vulnerable children. He couldn't live with himself if he didn't save them.
He drew another breath, trying to uncage the reckless rebel everyone in authority said was inside him. Boomer placed a hand on his shoulder, the pressure of it reassuring him. His friend offered up a bit of hope. "There is a troop transport though. Looks big enough to hold us all. You can pilot a transport, right?" Boomer asked Rene.
She nodded. "Yeah, I think so. Shouldn't be too different from a tanker. Cylons like consistency."
Starbuck breathed easier but his relief was cut short as Rene exclaimed, "But I didn't see any guns. I need guns, lasers, some sort of energy to open up the rift. We won't be able to use it to get to the Galactica."
Starbuck cursed loudly, but his friend squeezed his shoulder hard, a clear message that Starbuck's fiery temper wasn't going to help anyone right now.
Other than the squeeze, his friend ignored him as he nodded and began to plot,. "Okay not our final escape, but we can still use it. We could get all the kids into the transport while we provide cover," Boomer began to form a plan. "We get us in the air, find someplace safe, and worry about getting back to the Galactica later. We get the kids to safety first, then we can work on finding a raider or a viper. You and I get the transport and then…."
"NO!" Starbuck found his voice, jumping at his own shout before lowering his voice. "They'll just call up raiders and shoot us down. Besides, we had a deal. If there wasn't a raider, Rene's going to go get Apollo. Now. She's going to leave now."
Starbuck nearly jolted in shock when Rene simply nodded and whispered softly, "Yes sir," and turned to leave him. It was the sweetest farewell he could have asked for. She didn't question his decision. She didn't argue or negotiate. Without hesitation, she had turned to act on his words. It was not at all what he had expected her to do, and he would have liked to have known how that was going to turn out. He didn't get a chance to find out if she would have truly followed his order.
It was Boomer's hand that shot out to halt her. "Hold up. What? She won't be safe on her own. She should stay with us, get that transport going."
Starbuck shook his head vehemently. "No. I am not risking her life on this. I know we're going down there, and we're getting those kids out, but I need her safe. I am not losing my child too in the bargain. She is going to go find Apollo. He is our only hope of all of us finding the safety of the fleet."
Boomer gripped his shoulder hard. "Hate to be the bearer of bad news, Bucko, but we don't know if Apollo found anything. He could be dead for all we know. She is safer here with us. It is Rene that is going to get us back to the fleet, not Apollo."
Starbuck felt the grit crunching in his teeth as he ground them against the words his buddy was uttering. He latched onto the words he could live with, rejected those he couldn't.
"Here then. She waits here." He hit the turbos on his brain, calculating odds, the distance, and the numbers they were up against to the numbers they had. A plan began to form in his mind, and he saw it play out, where to hit them, where to lay the explosives, when to run. He nodded to himself. "Alright, we go in, guns blazing, tossing explosives and taking down cylons. Jake, you head for the transport. You can pilot it, right?" He took in the nod of Jake's head, before blasting forward.
"Boomer, you go for the communications tower there, then you join Jake. Avery can go with you. We've got to keep the raiders from raining down on us, plus it's on your way to the transport. Jake will get the engines ready and we will get the kids to you. If we get lucky, we can at least get some distance before the raiders get here. We can abandon the transport in the hills, maybe closer to Apollo's objective, or if that doesn't exist we get lost in some more caverns. Avery?"
There was a soft "Yeah," from the top of the ridge.
"You have in mind a safe place we can go? Where have you been hiding out all these yahrens?"
"We have places. We were holding them off until we ran out of food, so yeah, I have someplace but no provisions, just water."
Starbuck sighed heavily. What he wouldn't give for a big fat bovine steak right about now, or at least some soup and a green salad, but that would have to wait. They could all survive a little longer on water and hares. "We can worry about food once we have everyone safe. Avery, your men are with me. We take out the enemy and take down those fences. If we can get that done, then we'll see about those buildings as well. Fences first so the kids can run. Rene, you wait here. I will come back and get you when this is all done, and if I don't, you head for Apollo's objective. Understood?"
He wasn't asking for suggestions to his plan, just for confirmation that they knew the tasks required. No one spoke and Starbuck felt something in his teeth crack. He unclenched his jaw, "This will work. We have the manpower. I will send some of Avery's men to the mining operation first to create a distraction. That will draw the centurions away and then there aren't that many of them for the rest to deal with. We could get them trapped in the mine with a cave in. We have enough explosives for that, and then we get someone here on this ridge aiming for the guards in the towers, pick them off one by one, then we go in. We can do this."
Boomer had eased up on his shoulder as he considered the plan. "That would work. I can join you on the distraction and send Jake for the transport, and Avery can take communications. Rene can be the sniper on the ridge and we can double back for her right after we hit the fences. Good plan."
Starbuck swallowed the sarcastic comment on the tip of his tongue, "Gee thanks", and instead asked, "What have I forgotten?"
Boomer thought for a moment then shook his head no, as did Avery. Starbuck shifted his focus to Rene and Jake. "Alright. Time for you two to do what you do. Pick the plan apart, or tell me at least what parts you don't intend to follow to do your own thing, so spit it out now!"
The confused look the two gave each other before turning back to face him was either very well-rehearsed or they truly were not comprehending what Starbuck was asking. Erring on the side of safety, Starbuck assumed the former, that this was an often used tactic of theirs, feigning confusion so they could avoid the orders they didn't like. Starbuck levelled his best instructor glare at Jake.
"I mean it. What parts are you going to follow, what don't you like?"
Jake cast Rene another look, but she gave him no answer other than to turn back to Starbuck. Jake was hesitant as he too turned back to deal with him.
"I don't want to risk her either, but I may need help with the transport. I agree with you, I would rather leave her in a safe place and hope she is still there when I come back, but she's not safe here alone. Boomer's right, she's safer with us. She and I could skirt the perimeter then make for the transport."
"She could," Starbuck agreed, "but she won't. She's staying here. If this goes well, it is not that far to climb up here and get her. And if we have to, you take off with the kids and Rene and I can hike to the rendezvous."
"You two wouldn't survive that hike," Jake warned.
"We've made it this far. We'll be fine." Starbuck had not meant it to sound so possessive. This wasn't about Rene picking sides. This was about keeping her alive.
Starbuck looked to his wife, who had gone silent while they discussed her as if she was not there with them. In a way she wasn't. He appraised her for a moment, trying to read her pyramid face for what she might be thinking. Her eyes were gazing past him to the top of the ridge as she took measured breathes, one after another. It was the fourth breath he counted that made him realize she was terrified. Her words before of bravado were just that, words. She was trying to follow the training her own Colonel had instilled in the sewer rats, a technique to breathe through the fear. He could hear her voice in his head using the phrase she had mumbled often in their quarters when she woke from the terrors in her sleep. "Just let the fear wash over you."
He wanted to get her out of here before they tried to take this base, somewhere safe, dry, and warm with plenty of food and clean water. That wasn't an option and taking her with them wasn't any safer than leaving her here in the hills. "Dammit," he muttered, cursing Apollo. His friend would have known what to do to solve this dilemma, or at the very least, he could return right about now with that mythical viper he was hunting.
It was Wyatt's voice that offered a solution, "I'll stay here with her. I'm a good shot and besides, you took my kids to the Galactica, right? I want to see them again so I'm sticking with her. These are everyone else's kids. They are going to outrun me to get to them."
Starbuck absorbed the information, readjusting his plan.
"Rene," he called to get her attention. Her eyes were slow to track to him. He flashed the sign at Rene asking if that was agreeable. He wasn't sure if she read it right or if she was seeing anything beyond her fears until she nodded.
"Alright, Wyatt. Lay us down some good cover, take out the guards. Wait until you see the explosions at the mine before you start. Boomer you are with Jake and Avery. Get those communications and get to that transport, get it in the air. Avery's men are with me. When this is done and the kids are away, I will double back for Rene while you get the kids somewhere safe. Later, then you can come back for us or we can find you. Apollo's objective is the rendezvous."
Boomer started to protest, but Starbuck cut him off, "You can't run on that leg and Jake needs help. The kids need help and you need to get them to safety. Besides, I owe you a rescue and you know how I hate paying my debts, so don't make me have to save you. Furthermore, you need to cut back on the mushies. You've put on weight."
Before Starbuck had even completed the gibe, he was reaching for his wife and crushing her to him. The quickness of his action startled her. She struggled in his hold for the briefest of moments before he felt her melt into his arms. He heard her measured breaths catch in her throat, and he could feel the ragged gasp as she pulled in air in surprise, then she choked it off as she trembled. He held on tight as he whispered in her ear, "Don't come for me. Don't you dare. You go. Shoot the guards and then you cut and run. Do it for me. And when you get back you tell the commander," he hesitated for a moment, then blazed forward, "you tell him he is top of my list and I don't care what he names the baby, boy or girl, I'm calling it Adama."
He felt the air leave her in a mixture of a chuckle and a sob. He would have held on tighter and longer, whispered how much he loved her, but Boomer's hand on his shoulder let him know he should let go. There was a mission that he was late for.