Chapter 15: A Step Forward, a Step Back
It was still dark when Happy rolled over in bed, he moved his hand across the bed; the place where Liv had been sleeping was empty and cold. He rubbed his eyes as he sat up and looked towards the door, there was a blue glow coming down the hallway. Happy wondered if she had a nightmare, if she had, they had grown less intense because he wasn't woke up by her. He smiled as he got out of bed and pulled on his boxers. He hoped that they were on the road to mending the bridge between them. He walked out of the room and turned the corner to see Liv curled up on the couch with a cup of tea in her hands, and staring at the television. Happy stood there quietly watching her as she sipped her tea. He had found that she liked to drink tea when she woke up in the middle of the night, it comforted her. She had mentioned something about her mother and how it was familiar. He made sure he always had some on hand for her. She had pulled her hair up and it was a mess on top of her head and she was just wearing his t-shirt that he had worn earlier. He liked how she looked in his shirt and he was pretty sure she didn't have anything on under it since he had decimated her underwear. He sat in the chair next to the couch.
Liv looked over at Happy, he looked content and relaxed; now that she thought about that might have been the first time she had ever seen him like that. There was so much that they needed to talk about but she wasn't ready to ruin their moment of peace together. She took another sip of her peppermint tea as she thought about the night. She had dozed off briefly with Happy but was woken up by his soft snores and her mind started running wild with thoughts. As desperate as she was to shut off her brain she couldn't; sleep was futile and she realized that after tossing and turning for an hour. Liv finally got out of bed and had been up for at least an hour before Happy emerged from the bedroom looking like a sexy tattooed god.
"Bad dream?" Happy asked quietly as he changed the channel on the TV, Liv wasn't really watching it anyway. She never did, it was there to take her mind off of what was bothering her. Background noise to quiet her head.
"No." Olivia shook her head. "Too much going on up here," Liv tapped the side of her head as a smirk spread across her face, like she had her own private joke she wasn't sharing with him.
"Anything you want to talk about?" Happy knew it was about them. He wanted to get that talk done sooner rather than later. His guts turned at the thought of talking about his feelings; it was just something he didn't do. He didn't feel…but there was something about Tig's daughter that made him click; made him feel. He had feeling for her.
The smirk on Liv's face was quickly erased. She took a deep breath, he really wanted to talk about stuff now, alright. She placed her cup on the coaster on the table. She turned to face Happy, she realized he looked like he was actually scared or nervous. "It's okay Hap, we don't need to talk right now." She knew that he had already shared with her which was a lot for him. She didn't want him to feel like he needed to get things out because she needed him to or wanted him to. She wanted him to go at his own pace, which at this point was as slow as a snail. It worked for her, she wasn't exactly ready to go headlong into another relationship.
"No. It's fine." Happy stood up and walked into the kitchen to get a beer. "You want something stiffer than your tea?" He called from the other room.
"I'll have what's left of the wine." This was not how she thought she was going to end her day. Okay yeah, she might have thought she was going to have sex but it certainly wasn't with Happy. And she never in a hundred years did she considered having a conversation about what was going on between them. She did yearned to gain some ground with him, to have him let her in. Happy handed her a glass filled with red wine and sat next to her on the couch. She leaned into him needing to feel some closeness. She took a drink of her wine, it was rich and buttery. "Mmm. Thank you." She smiled up at Happy as he looked down at her expectantly. She knew he wanted her to start to conversation but wondered where she should start. "Hap, I know that, this, whatever we are… it's complicated. But if you want it to work, we need to communicate. That means no running away when things get tough and no Diosa or croweaters when you get angry with me." Liv took a deep breath, she had to tell him about herself, something she hadn't done before is spoke about to him about her life before Charming, before the torture. She needed him to know why she was admit about no sex with other girls. "Hap, I was engaged…I'm supposed to be married and have babies right now."
Happy frowned at the thought of Liv being married to someone and having his kids. It actually made him resentful towards the faceless, nameless man. He didn't want to think about Liv being almost married; however if she would have gotten married, she would have been safe, unless it was to Juice and then she would have been in the same situation as she was in at that moment.
"I have trust issues because of him…Matt. We were high school sweethearts, it was my dull storybook ending I was looking for. Three weeks before our wedding I found out he was cheating on me with some girl that worked at one of the local bars. He shattered my heart. I didn't think I would love again after him. Then Juice literally walked into my life." Liv could feel the sting of losing Juice; she also felt guilty for speaking about him around Happy. Happy rubbed Liv's shoulder softly to let her know it was okay to carry on. He knew he was living in Juice's shadow; it was strange for him to feel like he was trying to work against a ghost but he knew if he wanted to be with Olivia, he needed to suck it up.
Liv gulped down the knot that was building in her throat as she continued, "I learned to love again. And I still have trust issues, I don't think that will ever change. Juice kept his secrets, they were deep and dark and for some reason he didn't trust me enough to tell me; then again I had secrets that I haven't shared with anyone other than Natalie. But that's not my point…" Liv realized she was rambling, which she tended to do when she was nervous. This thing with Happy made her nervous, was she really ready to let him in so quickly? "What are we, Hap?" She pulled back from him and searched his face for answers. She wanted to see that he felt the same way about her that she felt about him. She wanted to know that he wanted more than just sex; that he was willing to work on something with her.
"I don't know. All I know is that you make me feel things I have never felt before. Jealousy, guilt…" Happy trailed off. He felt love, but he wasn't ready to tell Liv that. "I know that I have hurt you. I don't know how to deal with women, Liv. I am used to having women around for my pleasure. I have never had a connection before, like I have with you. This is all new to me." He paused and then added, "It's more than sex, Olivia, if that is what you are asking."
Liv bit her lower lip, because that was partially what she was asking. "You know the sex is the only reason I keep you around…well that and I need a place to stay." Liv teased lightening the mood. She heard a low growl come from Happy, she giggled at him as he pulled her back tight against his bare chest.
"You're only keeping me around for the sex huh?" He snarled quietly in her ear just before he nipped her collar bone. Liv squeaked at the combination of pain and pleasure he brought her. Happy ran his hand up Liv's smooth milky thigh, he wanted to see if he was right about her wearing nothing under his shirt. His hand reached the apex of her thighs, "no underwear?"
Liv bent her head back and stared up at Happy whose eyes were hooded with lust. "I am sorry but my favorite panties were destroyed by some sex fiend, earlier this evening."
"I am sure that this fiend is willing to make it up to you." He smirked as he kissed the tip of Liv's nose.
Liv turned herself so she was straddling Happy's lap and looking at him face to face. She was burning with desire, this man did something incredible to her body. "Hmm. I would like to see him make it up to me." Olivia grinded herself against him.
Happy groaned as he stayed her hips and slid his middle finger inside of her. She was so wet, he smiled at the reaction her body had because of him. A moan escaped Liv's lips as he slid his finger in and out of her. Liv moved her hips along with his rhythm. "Happy, please." She pleaded with him, she could feel his hardness between her thighs and she wanted it inside of her. She felt insatiable. She stilled her body and pulled away from Happy and the marvelous things he was doing with his fingers.
He raised an eyebrow at Liv as he stuck his finger into his mouth, "You taste lovely."
Two could play that game, Liv would just be better at it than Happy. She looked down at Happy's lap where his erection fully visible through the open seam of his boxers. She smirked at him as she moved herself between his legs and ever so slowly put her mouth around his erection. His skin was velvety smooth and he tasted like salt. Happy gasped in surprise as Liv began to suck, she was careful to pay attention to the head, her favorite thing to do was to run her tongue around the tip and then take him deeply into her mouth. She seemed to get the best reaction out of Happy when she did that.
"Fuck, Liv." Happy moaned loudly. His hands were entwined tightly in Olivia's hair. He thought he was supposed to be paying her back for her underwear, how did it end up with her giving him a blow job? He pulled Liv's head back so she was no longer sucking on him but was looking up at him with a pouty look on her face. He drew her close to him so she was straddling him again. He knew that he didn't have a condom but he didn't care, he just wanted to feel her, all of her. He lifted her up and slid himself into her; Liv looked at him with wide eyes, she couldn't believe that he was throwing all caution to the wind. Happy thrust against her once and hit her in just the right spot making her forget her senses and move her hips against him.
Happy enjoyed the sight of Liv sitting astride him. He pulled his shirt off of her so he could pay attention to her beautiful breasts. They bounced as she gyrated against him. Happy brought his mouth to one of Olivia's nipples and started to suck, it instantly became hard in his mouth so he bit it gently. Liv sighed deeply, he loved how her body came alive for him. With his other hand he palmed her breast and played with the little numb which he ran between his thumb and forefinger. He got exactly the reaction he wanted, Liv started to move faster against him. It wasn't long before she threw her head back, "Happy!" she screamed out as an orgasm washed over her in waves.
Happy took control of Liv's hips and thrust himself hard against her as he followed in suit, "God Olivia!" He moaned as he gave one last pump, spilling his seed inside of her.
Liv laid her head on Happy shoulder, sitting there for several minutes while she tried to collect herself. She kissed his neck before climbing off of his lap. She was falling for Happy even if it seemed like it was too soon and there was too many obstacles in their way. She felt like the resemblance of the girl she used to be and Happy was the one who made her feel that way. "Happy?" She sat next to him on the couch.
Happy glanced over at Liv, she was sitting on his couch completely naked. He never wanted to forget how she looked at that moment. Her milky skin was flushed and sweaty; lips were plump and red, and her face had a glow to it. "Yeah?" He replied as he stared at the girl he wanted to make his.
"Do you remember how I thanked you the first time we had sex?" She asked him.
"Yeah." He had thought it was strange that she had thanked him that the first time they fucked. He waited for it to happen again but it never did so he just blew it off as a fluke.
"I never told you why I was thanking you." She really did have so much to be thankful for when it came to Happy. He had saved her in so many ways. "I thanked you because you gave me a choice. You made sure that I wanted to be with you. With that small gesture you gave me back my body."
Happy thought back to that night and how much she needed him. She wanted him to make her forget their touches. He would find those men and kill them…slowly. He would take pride in taking the men, who defiled Olivia, apart piece by piece. He hated that he couldn't take them out of her dreams, the one place where he couldn't reach those assholes. Happy gave Liv a sad smile. "I am glad I could give you something those bastards took away from you."
Liv watched Happy's jaw tense up and eyes grow cold. "Happy come back to me." She called out to him trying to pull him from his stormy mood.
"What did the porn star say to you that upset you so much?" Happy asked. And it was obvious to Liv she wasn't going to win that battle with the brooding Happy.
Liv stood up from the couch and grabbed Happy's shirt off the floor and pulled it over her head. She paused a moment wondering if she should tell Happy what Jake said to her. She realized if she didn't that she would just be going against everything she told Happy she needed him to do for her. Liv took a deep breath and then quietly said, "He asked me if my scars were from a botched boob job." Instantly she felt disgusted with herself and pulled her arms up around her chest as if could hide the scars from herself. "It just brought back the torture and how my body is ruined because of them."
Happy's eyes soften as he looked at Liv. He was glad that he punched the porn boy in the face, he only wished he had time to elicit more damage to his pretty face. "Olivia, you are one of the most gorgeous creatures I have ever set my eyes on. When I look at you I don't see your scars, I just see you." Happy stood up and pulled Liv into his arms. Her tired and sad eyes looked up to him. He was glad that things were starting to heal between them. "Let's get you to bed." Happy walked Liv towards the bedroom.
Happy had been awake for at least a half-hour watching Liv sleep on chest. He had to pee but he didn't have the heart to move her. She was so peaceful looking in her sleep. He could get used to waking up next to her every morning, what was she doing to him? Happy moved a strand of hair and touched Olivia's face, her skin was so soft and flawless. Liv stirred slightly when she felt Happy's touch.
"Mmm…morning." Liv stretched out, her body was slightly stiff from all the physical activity from the night before. "How long have you been up?"
"Not too long." Happy lied to her. "We should get up and head over to Red Woody." He kissed the top of Liv's head as she rolled towards her side of the bed.
"I don't want to get out of bed. Let's stay in bed all day." Liv could have alternated between sleeping and worshiping Happy's body all day. She couldn't get enough of him.
"As tempting as that sounds, I have club stuff I need to take care of." He relished the fact Liv wanted him all to herself. He was very tempted to take her up on the offer to stay in bed all day. "You know you don't want the emails to Red Woody to start piling up. I know how much you love responding to dirty old men." Happy teased.
Liv finally rose from the bed and started out towards her room but not before turning back and smirking at Happy, he made it too easy. "Maybe that is why I respond so well to you." She made a quick exit before he could respond. She knew Happy was slightly older than her but she didn't know how much. Juice was only 5 years older than she was but Happy was older than that, maybe by a year or two. She never thought to ask and it didn't really matter anymore. She like the light-hearted side of Happy, smiling as she got dressed. It was a summer dress sort of a day. She donned a light blue strapless eyelet dress and a pair of silver flats she had found while she was out shopping with Lyla. She took hair and braided it so it hung to one side of her head. She put on a light shimmer to brighter her eyes and mascara. When it came to make up she tended to be a minimalist, which was the complete opposite of Natalie who took over an hour to get ready every day.
"Liv? You ready?" Happy called from the other side of the door. He was getting impatient, girls took far too long to get ready. The door opened and Liv was standing on the other side. He held his breath for a moment while he took her in. "You look…" He trailed off. "Do you really think that wearing a dress on my bike is a good idea?"
Liv's lips turned up in a smile, "I'm sure I can manage. Should I be worried about you? I mean you can't even finish your sentences." She rubbed herself against him just before she passed him. Happy raised his eye brows, she might have to worry about him; he was a sucker for her body.
The ride to Red Woody was uneventful, as Happy parked his bike, his hand lingered on Liv's bare skin. "I think you should move into my room." Happy said quietly to Liv, and he ran his hand down up her thigh and under her dress.
Liv stopped breathing for a second, was that Happy's way of committing to her? That was a big step for him. "I do get lonely in the spare room all by myself." She smirked as she hugged herself to him before getting off of his Harley. "Hap, I am not quite ready to tell my dad about us."
Happy laughed at Liv, she was just as scared to tell Tig as he was. "I have absolutely no problem with that." He really did not want to be around when Tig found out. He knew how protective he already felt about Liv and especially after what happened to Dawn. She is lucky he hadn't put her in a bullet proof bubble. Happy couldn't help but smirk at the thought of Liv in a bubble. She would be so pissed off at Tig.
"Good trip, brother?" A Scottish accent pulled him out of his thoughts as he was walking towards Red Woody behind Liv.
Happy looked over at Chibs who was walking in with him. "It was okay. Why?" He gave Chibs a puzzled look.
Chibs raised his eyebrow at the Sargent at Arms, he knew something was up. He couldn't remember Happy walking into the club house with an actual smile on his face. "You look like you got laid, I mean the Washington pussy must have been good to keep you so cheery looking for so long."
Happy scowled at Chibs. "Nah, didn't get any while I was there. Too busy."
"Aye whatever you say brother." He smacked Happy on the back as they walked through the doors.
Liv needed to talk to Lyla and went searching for her as soon as she got through the doorway. She wanted to warn her about Jake's face and had a more personal question for her. Olivia made her way to the small editing room which used to be in the main bar area but Lyla wanted more privacy while editing so Jax had it moved to an office in the back of the warehouse. Liv stood outside of the door and knocked softly on the door before walking in. Lyla had her back to her and was busy watching a movie with where two guys were fucking some girl…she was new and Liv hadn't even met her yet.
"Hey Lyla?" Liv sat next to her in a chair.
"Oh hey Liv. You look nice today." Lyla touched Liv's dress.
Liv looked down at herself, "Thanks. Do you have a minute to chat?" She was nervous.
"Oh yeah." Lyla stopped the play back of the film and turned her attention to Olivia. She was fidgeting with her dress, Lyla could feel Liv's anxiety roll off of her. "What's up? Hey how did your date with Jake go last night?" Lyla was rooting for whoever made Liv content.
Liv frowned at the thought of Jake. "Um not so well…okay don't get me wrong he is a sweet guy but he made a comment about my scars from when I was tortured and it totally turned me off to him. Then Happy came home…" Lyla knew nothing good could have come from that. "He punched Jake, who will probably be sporting a nice bruise today. Jake stormed off, so I think that bridge is burned because I am sure he blames me for what happened."
"Happy needs to learn to control his anger. You do know he is into right?" Lyla had never talked to Liv about Happy before. She didn't know if Liv had been receptive to Happy or if she was still hung up on Juice.
Liv snorted quietly. "Yeah I know. I am into him too, maybe more than I should be for someone who just lost her boyfriend, two months ago." Liv trailed off. She really didn't want to ask Lyla her next question, she seemed so irresponsible. "Um…so I have a question for you." Liv entwined her fingers and then looked back up at Lyla who was staring back at her with expectantly. "Do you happen to have any morning after pills?"
Lyla blinked at Liv for a second, she had to comprehend what she was asking. "Um yeah, I think I can get my hands on some for you. Happy?" She asked
A smiled crossed Liv's lips as she looked up at Lyla. "Yeah. Last night things got a little out of hand between us and we didn't use protection. I just want to be sure that I don't get pregnant. That would be just what I needed." She shook her head, she wasn't ready for a baby and she damn well knew Happy wasn't either. "I was on birth control when I was with Juice but I haven't been since I have been here, obviously."
"Don't worry about it, we have all been there. Come with me." Lyla stood up and held out her hand for her. Liv took Lyla's hand and followed her to the dressing room where she opened up one of the stands. She rummaged around in the drawer for a couple of seconds before pulling out several orange prescription bottles. She examined the labels before handing Liv two little white pills. "If you need them, they are here." She put the bottle back into the stand.
"Thank you, Lyla. I really appreciate everything you have done for me, since I have arrived." Liv smiled as they walked out towards the main room of Red Woody.
"It's just nice having another woman around here who is not a porn star or croweater." Lyla smiled warmly at Liv. She did really like Tig's daughter, she was sweet and worked hard. She was someone she wanted to be friends with, plus her kids like her. "So you and Hap?" Lyla bumped into her with her hip.
"Yeah." Olivia bit her lower lip as they walked up the bar. "And no one knows so if we could keep it between us."
"My lips are sealed." Lyla pretended to lock her lips.
Liv poured herself a glass of water and popped the pills into her mouth as Happy walked up to them. Lyla gave him an all knowing look before excusing herself to go back to work. "What was that all about?" Happy asked Liv as she swallowed another mouth full of water. Liv shook her head and drained the glass of its water. "If you have a headache, I know what could get rid of it." He winked at her.
"Not a headache, just making sure that there aren't any little Happy's brought into this world in 9 months." She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "I think we both got a little caught up in the moment last night…so I took the morning after pill just in case."
Happy hadn't even thought about it, he wasn't ready to have kids, before Liv he didn't even want them but now she was changing his view on things and he thought it might be nice to have a kid with her someday. "You're a smart girl!"
"Of course she is. She is my daughter." Liv's eyes got really big as she saw her dad standing behind Happy. She wondered how long he had been there, if he had heard their conversation he wouldn't have looked so glad to see her as he walked behind the bar and kissed her on the forehead. "How you doing sweetheart?"
"I am doing pretty well. How about you, daddy?" She smiled at Tig, he had wormed his way into her heart quickly. It could have been the fact she was grasping at whatever family she had.
"I'm good. How's that asshole treating you?" He nodded head towards Happy his hair flopping to side.
Olivia chuckled at Tig as she looked over at Happy who raised his eye brows at her and gave her a quick wink. "Just fine, Daddy. He has been nothing but amiable since he came back from his run." She was glad to see that her dad was checking up on her. It showed her that he cared. At first she was scared he was going to try to make up for the time that he was missing and smother her but he hadn't. Tig was an odd duck but at least he was her odd duck.
"Hap, Tig. Tyler is here. " Jackson called to them as the door to Red Woody opened. They walked towards the door to meet with Tyler and the other one-niners that followed him.
Liv watched them for a moment but as she was going to turn and head to her office she heard a voice she recognized in the group of men. Her stomach churned and panic hit her hard. She turned to look and there he was with his dark brown eyes staring right at her licking his lips as if he was going to eat her for dinner. Liv turned quickly and rushed towards the back of Red Woody. How could he have found her?
A/N: Yay…Happy and Liv are together-ish. I am looking forward to getting the next few chapters out to you guys. Hope you enjoyed this chapter. Please let me know what you think…and as always thank you so very much for your support!