AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Hi everybody! I hope you all had a nice holiday! Here's a new update for all of you. I think that this might be my favorite chapter I've written so far in this story.

Enjoy!

Chapter 4

Alex closed the door behind the three doctors as they left the patient room and walked towards the charting station on the peds floor.

Arizona let out a sigh as she opened up Briley's chart on the tablet in front of her. She documented her treatment plan and ordered more pain meds for her to keep her comfortable before handing the tablet back to the nurse.

"That was rough," Callie said as she closed her eyes and rubbed her temples.

"To say the least," Arizona finished. While that was somewhat of the reaction they were expecting, it still caught them a little off-guard to see Briley's outburst like that.

The doctors, each lost in their own thoughts, walked towards Arizona's office in silence for a bit before Arizona spoke up, letting Callie get a glimpse of what was running through her mind.

"Do you think Briley even knows about my leg?"

Callie laughed at the silliness of the question.

"Um, why wouldn't she know? She's Sofia's best friend. She's at our house almost as much as- if not more than- we are. Of course she knows about the leg," Callie replied.

"But I don't know if she does. I've never come right out and told her about it, and I don't think you have either. I mean, the topic of my leg has always been a kind of 'taboo' subject around the house, and is hardly ever talked about anyways," Arizona pointed out. "I rarely ever use my wheelchair around the house anymore, and I only use the crutches when it's really late at night or if I'm having a bad leg day."

Callie shrugged.

"I can see why she wouldn't know, but don't you think Sofia's told her?" Callie asked.

Now it was Arizona's turn to shrug.

"That's just it- I don't know. I see them as being the type of friends that know everything about the other one. Then again, 'Hey, did you know that my mom only has one leg?' doesn't really make its way into conversation that easily."

By now, they had reached Arizona's office. Callie turned the knob and opened the door, immediately taking a seat on the couch upon entering the room. Arizona sat in her desk chair, using her right foot to spin the chair back and forth as she mindlessly chewed on the cap of a pen.

"I just feel like if Briley knows about my leg, she wouldn't have said some of the things she did in there," Arizona said quietly.

"She's angry. And scared. The things you said when you woke up from surgery were worse than that," Callie reminded her, straightening up in her seat. "You can't hold what she said against her."

Arizona shook her head.

"No, no, I'm not. But hear me out: I think that if she doesn't know about my leg, maybe me sharing that part of myself with her could help to change her perspective. Maybe I could talk to her… and I don't know, maybe be like a mentor to her?" Arizona wondered out loud.

Adjusting the pillows next to her on the couch, Callie processed Arizona's words before giving her answer.

"I think you should text Sofia and ask her if Briley knows, and if she doesn't you should go into her room this afternoon and tell her. It could be comforting for her- and for her parents- to know that there's someone she knows so well that was in the same situation as she was. I sure wish we had someone like that when you were in her position."

Arizona nodded in agreement, taking out her iPhone and clicking on her daughter's name. She typed a quick message to her and clicked the send button.

Hey Sof, do you know if Briley knows that I'm an amputee? Let me know when you get a chance. Love you. Mom

Just seconds after her message went out, her phone chimed with Sofia's reply:

I don't think she knows. At least, I've never told her.

Arizona read the message out loud to Callie before crafting her response.

Okay, thank you Sweetheart. And get off your phone during class!

Just as she added that last sentence to her text, Arizona's pager began to blare. Glancing at it, she rolled her eyes as she stood up, slipping her phone back into the pocket of her lab coat.

"Looks like this conversation with Briley will have to wait. Kepner just paged me to the pit," she said, turning to her wife to give her a kiss before heading out towards the elevator.

…

A pregnant mom had gotten into a car accident on the way to the hospital, and despite her best efforts to keep the baby "cooking" inside for the rest of the term, Arizona had to deliver the baby prematurely at 30 weeks.

She immediately had the little baby boy sent up to the NICU for evaluation and monitoring. After the surgery, Arizona had to tell the parents that their baby had to be delivered ten weeks early, but that they had no reason to worry just yet.

"Dr. Karev and the NICU team are amazing at what they do. They helped to save my own little girl many, many moons ago," Arizona smiled, taking out her phone and swiping through her photo album to find one of Sofia's soccer action shots from her last game.

Handing the phone to the new mom, Arizona took that moment to brag about Sofia a little more.

"She was born at 24 weeks. During her first five weeks of life, she had a brain bleed and heart surgery, but now she's the star of her high school soccer team!" Arizona told them

The couple thanked her for sharing and cited that the story made them feel better and more hopeful than before.

After leaving the patient room, it was about two o'clock, so Arizona had a late lunch with Callie in the cafeteria before they both headed back up to Peds.

Arizona leaned against the nurses' station counter as she looked in the window to Briley's room. She saw the girl alone in the room, flipping through channels on the TV.

"Now's your chance," Callie whispered to her wife.

Arizona's hopeful blue eyes met Callie's encouraging brown ones. They shared a soft kiss before Arizona took a deep breath.

"You've got this. Just be you. It's just Briley," Callie reminded her.

Arizona nodded. Her heart pounded as she knocked on the wooden door, opening it very slowly and popping her head in the room.

"Hey, Bri. Can we talk for a minute?" Arizona asked.

"Sure," Briley replied as she turned off the TV.

Arizona sat down on the chair next to Briley's bed. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat trying to collect her thoughts as Briley's dark blue eyes watched her.

"Has, um… Has Sofia ever told you about her daddy?" Arizona began.

Briley's eyebrows shot up in surprise as she shook her head no. Sofia has a dad?! That thought never occurred to her before.

"Okay, well, Sofia's dad- his name was Mark- was also a surgeon here at the hospital. He was a phenomenal doctor, and quite a funny guy. You'd like him. We didn't always get along, but he loved Sofia and he loved me and Callie," Arizona smiled as she reminisced on memories with Mark.

Briley nodded, signaling for Arizona to continue.

"So, one day, when Sofia was a baby, our boss told us that the two of us and a couple of other doctors were going to fly out to Idaho to perform a surgery on conjoined twins," Arizona explained.

"They flew you all out there? Why didn't the doctors there just do the surgery themselves?" Briley asked.

Arizona explained to her how that team of surgeons, which included Sofia's Aunt Lexie and Aunt Cristina, as well as Zola's parents, Dr. Grey and the late Dr. Shepherd, had already completed a similar surgery here in Seattle, so they were the most skilled doctors on the west coast to perform it.

"But when we were on our way there…" Arizona eyes welled up with tears. She tried to swallow the sob she could feel in her throat. "Our plane crashed."

Briley gasped.

"Oh my gosh! Was everybody okay?!" Briley asked, hanging on to every word Arizona said.

"We all had some injuries here and there. Some were more severe than others. But Sofia's dad and her Aunt Lexie passed away from the injuries they sustained as a result of the crash," Arizona sighed.

Briley gasped again.

"Oh no. Poor Sofia," Briley's heart ached for her best friend. She couldn't imagine losing her own father to something as horrific as a plane crash. "At least you were okay. I'm happy she didn't have to lose two parents."

Arizona gave Briley a soft smile as her heart sank.

"Ac-actually," Arizona started, her voice cracking. "I broke my leg really, really badly when the plane crashed. And by the time we reached a hospital, my leg was making me very sick. And my wife and my doctors decided that the only way to save my life would be to amputate it."

A chilling silence fell over the room as Arizona finished speaking. She watched as Briley's eyes drifted down to Arizona's legs and back up to meet her eyes. Her face was pale and her eyes were watery.

Arizona bent over and rolled up the leg of her pants, revealing the titanium limb that now served as her left leg. Leaving the pant leg rolled up so that it exposed her metal leg and plastic socket, she redirected her attention back to Briley.

"I wanted to share this with you because I know what you're feeling. Other people will say that they 'get it' or that they 'understand how hard this is for you', but they really have no idea. But I do know what you're going through, Briley. And it may seem like the end of the world right now, but I promise you, it's not," Arizona said, taking Briley's hand in her own.

"I've known you for years… and I never even knew…" Briley shook her head in disbelief.

Arizona laughed and ran her fingers through Briley's blonde hair.

"I know. You see? Losing a leg isn't the end of the world. I can still do everything that I did before I was disabled, I can still walk, stand for long periods of time to operate, and I was able to chase after Sofia when she was a toddler. I just wanted to tell you that I know you feel really, really crappy right now, but once we have you up and at 'em with a prosthetic, you will be unstoppable."

"But you walk so normal! How?!" Briley still was unable to process that the woman she had seen weekly for twelve years had a fake leg.

"Ha. Lots and lots of practice," Arizona replied, nodding her head. "Usually, if someone doesn't know about my leg, they don't notice anything funky when I walk, but I have a pretty noticeable gait difference. It's gotten much better over the years, but it's definitely still there. And you'll totally develop rock solid abs from using your prosthetic so much, so that is an added bonus!"

Briley and Arizona both laughed.

"Great, at least I'll have something to look forward to!" Briley giggled.

"I know it seems hard now. You have a long road ahead, and it seems so daunting and terrifying, but it will all end up alright in the end," Arizona assured her. " I know losing a leg seems like your world is crashing and burning all around you. I thought it was at first too. Since it was all so sudden, I became severely depressed and very angry. At myself, at my doctors, at my wife… pretty much everyone around me. Looking back on it, it tears me apart knowing how rude and downright awful I was to Dr. Callie during the first few months of my recovery. I took everything out on her- like she was the one who physically used the bone saw to remove my infected lower extremity from my body."

Briley stuck her tongue out and squirmed uneasily at how graphic Arizona was being with her description of surgery. Arizona noticed her reaction, but barely acknowledged it before continuing.

"I'm telling you this because I don't want you to be like me. I don't want you to be angry. Crappy stuff happens to us sometimes. That's life. But all that matters is how you react to it, positively or negatively," Arizona advised.

Briley nodded, solemnly listening to every word Arizona said.

"Seriously, though. I promise to not keep you in the dark about anything. I'll show you the good days and the bad days of being an amputee. I've been in that bed; I know the confusion and sadness and anger you're feeling. I know," Arizona nodded sympathetically. "If you have any questions, day or night, never feel afraid to ask me them. I am here to help you, okay kiddo?"

Briley nodded, a soft smile appearing on her face.

"Thank you, Dr. Arizona."

"Anytime, Bri."

Arizona rolled the leg of her pants back down before standing up and heading for the door.

"I'll see you later, okay?" Arizona called as she opened the door.

Briley nodded.

"See ya."

As Arizona made her way back into the hallway, a sense of pride and relief had come over her. For once, being an amputee had come to her advantage. She was now able to be of help to this teenager who was in the same position she was in fourteen years ago.

Arizona was going to do her very best to help Briley in every possible way. Because Callie was right- Arizona could've used someone like her when she was the patient.

…

"I just filled Sofia in on the updates to Briley's case. She just went to bed," Callie informed Arizona as she walked into their bedroom.

"Good. How'd she take it?" Arizona asked as she sat down on the edge of her side of the bed. She pushed up the left leg of her pajama shorts so that she could doff her prosthesis. She leaned her leg against the bedside table next to her and rolled off the silicone liner she wore underneath it and set it on the floor next to the bed. Leaning back, she laid down in bed and cuddled in under the covers.

"Uh, she was upset, but that's to be expected. She was worried about Briley not being able to play soccer anymore," Callie replied.

"Did you tell her that there are many amputees that play sports?"

"Of course I did. I think she was just shocked. I'm sure she'll have come to terms with the situation in the morning."

Callie laid down in bed next to Arizona as she clicked off the lamp, darkening the room.

"Good night. Love you," Callie said to the darkness.

"Night, love you too," Arizona replied.

Arizona rolled on to her side so that she was facing away from Callie. As she tried to fall asleep, her thoughts brought her to how she started the conversation she had had with Briley earlier.

Mark was a phenomenal doctor, and quite a funny guy. We didn't always get along, but he loved Sofia and he loved me and Callie.

Though she hated to admit it, with all of the business going on in her life right now, Arizona hadn't really taken the time to miss Mark lately. She knew that he deserved to be kept alive in her mind everyday; she owed that to him. Even though she barely had time for her own thoughts that didn't involve doctoring these days, a part of her felt guilty for not having Mark's memory on her mind, even fourteen years later.

What would he be doing now? Would he have won a Harper Avery? Would him and Lexie have gotten married and had kids? Would Sofia be a big sister?

So many "what ifs" raced through Arizona's mind in the darkness of the bedroom.

Callie was trying to drift off herself when she felt the bed shake a little. She heard Arizona sniffle softly, and she processed what was happening.

Sitting up, she flipped on the switch to the light, illuminating the room. Callie's suspicions were confirmed when she saw that Arizona had curled herself up into a tight little ball and was clutching the duvet in her fist. She was crying, but trying her best to be silent.

"Arizona…" Callie's voice trailed off as her heart broke watching Arizona cry. Callie robbed the blonde's arm. "What's the matter?"
"I- I miss Mark," came Arizona's reply as she let a sob escape from her throat.

Surprised, Callie slightly gasped before turning the light back off and snuggling up to Arizona. Callie knew that Arizona and Mark had fought like cats and dogs, but they were also like siblings. She knew deep down that Mark's death was equally as hard on Arizona as it was for her.

"I do too," Callie said as she kissed Arizona's shoulder. "I do too."

Callie rested her cheek against Arizona's back as she continued to let all of the emotion she had been keeping in out. Callie intertwined her two feet with Arizona's one, still momentarily confused when her leg brushed against the foreshortened limb.

Callie held Arizona as they both drifted off to sleep, memories of Mark heavy on both of their minds and hearts.

Mark 3

I hope you all liked this one! As always let me know what you think by leaving a review below! I loooooooove to read your thoughts!

xoxo Arizona Robbins MD