"Having children just puts the whole world into perspective.
Everything else just disappears."
~ Kate Winslet

Liv fought back tears as Happy drove to the hospital. She wasn't sure if was the pain that was in physically or the ache in her heart that was causing the sudden urge to sob. She had imagined the moment that she and Happy met their son for the first time completely differently than it was unfolding before her. She didn't want to be around Happy after he had accused her of cheating on him and then called her a bitch. Sure, she had brought up things that she shouldn't have but from how Liv saw it, Happy deserved it.

"Hang in there, baby we're almost there." Happy muttered in a calm tone as he sped through traffic.

"Do not call me baby." Liv snapped; how dare he use her pet name. As she saw it, he had no right to it. Olivia glared at Happy, but he made no effort to look over at her. From the whiteness of his knuckles she could tell he did not like her response. Serves him right.

When they finally arrived at the hospital, Happy pulled the car up to the front and looked over at Liv. "We're here. I'll help get you in and then park the car." There was an edge to his voice; Olivia could tell he was holding his anger at bay.

Liv didn't wait for Happy to help her out of the car, she had climbed out by the time he got to her side. "I can get myself in, if you want to go park Lyla's car." Liv said quietly thankfully the pains that had plagued had dulled on the drive over.

Happy studied her stubborn face for a moment. "You sure?" He questioned. Liv nodded in response. "Alright, I will be right back."

She didn't want him to be right back, Olivia didn't want to be around Happy at that point. What a shitty time for their baby to decide he needed to make an entrance into the world. Liv made her way into the hospital and towards the maternity ward like she was told to do during their tour. By the time she got to the desk, she was in pain again.

"May I help you?" The brunette behind the desk looked up at Olivia.

She's do goddamn perky. Liv thought as she slammed her hand down on the desk as surge of pain hit her hard. "I think I am in labor. I am having pai…n." She managed to get the last word out.

"Alright, lets get you into a room." The brunette rushed around the desk and grabbed a wheel chair for Liv. "How far along are you?"

"36 weeks and 5 days." Liv said quietly. It was too early. She saw it written all over her face.

"Alright. Let's just get you set up in this room and I will get in touch with the on-call OB. Do you have a primary doctor?" She kept her voice calm, but Liv could see right through it. She did that plenty of times when she was working with women in the Women's Center.

"Yes, Dr. Hunnam has been over seeing my case. I am a high-risk pregnancy. All my records should be in the system already. My…" Liv paused a moment to collect herself and tried to ignore the pain. "name is Olivia Trager."

"Alright, Ms Trager. If you could please change into this gown, if you need help, I will be right outside the curtain." The woman stepped aside and pulled the curtains closed.

Liv heard some an exchange between two women as she undressed and pulled on the hospital gown. A nurse peaked through the curtain as Liv was sitting down on the bed. She pulled back the curtain as she walked towards the bed.

"Hello, Ms. Trager, my name is Ashley, I will be your nurse. We have a call into Dr. Hunnam; as your chart requested. He should be in soon but until then our on-call OB will assess you. I am going to hook up these monitors to you. They will read fetal heart rate and your contractions. I need to do an exam on you."

Liv just nodded and studied Nurse Ashley as she hooked up the monitors to her now bare and overly expanded abdomen. She was pretty. Long eye lashes and big, happy brown eyes. Liv was jealous of the glee that she exuded. This was supposed to be one of the happiest moments of her life and there she was feeling miserable and worried. Then the one sound that could make her feel some relief filled the silence of the room. LL's heartbeat whooshed loud and strong.

"Your baby's heart rate is nice and normal. Do you have anyone else here with you?" Ashley questioned as she started to do her exam on Liv.

Olivia was about to answer when Happy barged into the room. He frowned at the nurse before his eyes met Liv's. He looked worried, but Liv was sure he heard LL's heart, relief must have hit him as well. Happy made his way next to Liv's bed.

"Well Olivia, you are only dilated to a two. If you need anything while we wait for Dr Hunnam please let me know. Otherwise, a phlebotomist will be in shortly to put in your IV catheter and draw some blood." Ashley looked from Liv to Happy and gave them both a smile.

Olivia could feel the tension between her and Happy, it was thick in the air and she was sure that the nurse and lab tech could feel it when they were in the room. Neither of them made an effort to speak to the other, there was nothing to be said as far as Liv saw it. When most couples would be brimming with excitement at the thought of meeting their baby; they were not.

It felt like it took ages for Dr Hunnam to make his appearance. But when he finally did, he came in with a broad smile. "This is a little sooner than I would have liked to see you, Liv." His blue eyes studied her before he grabbed gloves. "How are you feeling?"

Liv frowned, was he really asking her that? "Painful."

He placed an ultrasound probe on her abdomen and gazed at the screen. "That is to be expected. I was concerned that when the nurse told me about your pain that your placenta detached but it looks like everything is good. Now, baby boy's heart rate is great and shows no sign of distress."

The doctor moved to do his exam, "You are definitely dilated to a two like the nurse said. Since your bag of water is still intact, I want to keep that baby in as long as possible. So, I am going to order some drugs to see if we can get your contraction under control." Dr. Hunnam smiled gently at Liv. "Which will help with the pain. When the nurses told me about your pain, I was worried something more was going on. How is your stress level?"

Honestly? Liv thought before answering. "I just got home from Portland, so I am slightly stressed out." Liv said quietly in response. She didn't need him to know that she had just had a huge blow out fight with Happy.

Happy snorted, it was the first noise that he made. Liv turned and looked at him, but he made no attempt to look at her. She rolled her eyes in response.

Oh, if you only knew Dr Hunnam. Liv's mind screamed.

"Thank you, Dr Hunnam. I appreciate you coming in." Olivia plastered on a fake smile.

"Of course. My job is to make sure we keep you and that little boy of yours safe and healthy." He smiled and left the room. "As soon as you get the injection, you should feel better and I want you to rest."

After Liv received her medications, the contractions she had been having calmed. They happened still but they were not as intense, and they were happening less. That also meant the nurses did not come in and act as a buffer between her and Happy. They were under strict instructions to just let Liv rest unless there was anything abnormal with her monitors.

Olivia closed her eyes and tried to shut out Happy. He had turned on the television and was watching it. Neither of them made an effort to communicate with the other. They were at a silent impasse, too many hurtful words had been said between them. Too much had happened, and it made Liv wonder if thing would ever be good between them again. It hurt too much to think about.

The sound of Happy's breathing and the TV finally lulled Liv to sleep. She slept through the night and it wasn't until the sun was shining through the blinds did, she finally wake up. It had been one of the most restful sleeps she had in weeks. Hell, it might have been months. The nurse made her morning round and they brought Liv food. There was still a stalemate between Liv and Happy. Neither of them spoke to the other. Happy started pacing the room, and it annoyed the fuck out of Liv.

Finally, Liv broke the silence between them. "Happy, you need to leave. I need you to leave. We need a break from each other. I cannot handle your pacing, it is stressing me out…"

Happy froze where he was and stared at Liv. Pain was etched across his face. Olivia knew he was hurting because of what she did and said. But she needed space to be able to breath. Maybe she would be able to sort out her feelings, but with Happy breathing down her neck she couldn't, he just made her angrier at him.

Liv's tears betrayed her, "please." She whispered.

A deep sigh escaped from Happy's lips. She couldn't tell if it was relief or despair. He nodded and walked out of the room leaving Liv by herself for the first time since she got to the hospital. She was left alone with her thoughts and all of her hurt.

It wasn't long before the door to her room opened and Tig walked through. "Hey baby girl." He was wearing a smile which was quickly replaced by a grimace when he saw Liv had been crying. "You want to talk to me about it?" He asked.

She didn't really want to discuss her love life with her dad but the counselor in her knew it would make her feel better. Olivia shook her head no. Knowing well enough that her dad would not give up that easy.

"Now Liv, I know something is up. Happy is even more miserable than normal." Her dad's icy eyes were filled with concern and they searched her face.

That was it; the dam of broke and tears flowed freely from Olivia's eyes. Tig gave her some time to collect herself before she answered him. Liv appreciated it more than he could have understood. It gave her time to gather her thoughts.

"This isn't how things are supposed to be happening. Happy and I are supposed to be enjoying this time and not fighting." Olivia sniffled as she brushed away the tears from her cheeks. "Happy is angry with me because I saw Juice when I was in Portland."

Tig's whole posture changed at the mention of Juice. It was not lost on Liv that he became more defensive. "What do you mean that you saw Juice? Did you just run into him randomly?"

Liv sighed, of course he would see things the same way Happy did. "No, we did not just bump into each other. I called him…" Tig growled but Liv continued, "…and please just let me explain, it's the least you could do for me."

Unlike Happy. She thought.

Tig nodded and sat down in the chair next to her bed. With those small gestures relief washed over Liv and she began to relax a bit.

"During my therapy sessions lots of stuff from my past has been drudged up. Most of which revolved around my relationship with Juice. It stemmed from my need for forgiveness from him. I needed to be able to finally close that chapter in my life and he was the only one who could provide me with that closure. After he said he forgave me, I told him I could never see him again or have any contact with him ever again. It was fair to him or Happy. When I came home Happy accused me of cheating on him with Juice. Then he called me a fucking bitch. All the stress from our fight caused this." Liv motioned around the room and a frown crossed her face.

Tig shook his head before he responded. "Did you even tell Happy before you met with Juice?"

Olivia snorted, "Really?" He knew who he was talking about, right?! "Dad, I told Happy only what I thought he needed to know. That I was meeting an old friend for coffee."

Tig took Liv's hands into his own. "Olivia Grace, you should have spoke to Hap about it." He patted the top of her hands.

Such a dad thing to say. Now here comes the lecture. She thought.

"Put yourself in Happy's position. How would you have felt if you found out that Happy spent time with one of the whores behind your back?"

Why did he have to make sense? In all their fighting Liv had not put herself in Happy's shoes and she was sure he had also not put himself in hers.

"I know I should have told him, but he reacted exactly how I expected him to. However, you're right, Dad. I should have put myself in Happy's place before just doing what I did."

Tig smiled at her. "That my girl. Go easy on him, Olivia. He loves you and the baby more than I think he even knows how. You guys owe it to yourselves to work through this before you bring my grandson into this world. He will need parents who are at a good place to welcome him, not ones that are broken."

Liv wondered if her dad was speaking from experience. He had kids with two different women and neither of those women were with him anymore. Hell, he didn't have a relationship with Liv until she was an adult and he no longer had a relationship with her sister. Olivia had only heard stories about Dawn and Fawn and those were few and far between. She understood it was too painful for Tig to talk to her about after the unfortunate event that happened to Dawn.

Tig's words soaked into Olivia's heart and mind. "I will try, Daddy." Liv squeezed his hand.

"Good girl." He stood and gave Liv a hug and kissed the top of her head. "Should I send Happy back in?"

Should he? She wondered. Would he be willing to listen and not argue? Probably not but she was willing to take that chance.

Liv swallowed hard before answering. "Yes, please. And hank you for giving me a whole new perspective on things. I love you, Dad."

"That is why I am here. I love you too Olivia." He made his way out of the room.

It wasn't long before the door opened again. Liv expected it to be Happy, but it wasn't. It was one of her nurses doing a check on her. It was a disappointing blow to Liv. She ached to have Happy close to her again. She wished that they hadn't fought and that she wouldn't have kicked Happy out.

Dr. Hunnam followed up with Liv after the nurse left. He was pleased to see that she had not progressed any further; the medications were obviously doing their jobs. He had told Liv that she only needed to make it a day or two to be considered full term. That was a relief. One less stress in Liv's life. However, she was stuck in the hospital until the baby was born.

Olivia had given up on Happy coming into the room to make peace with her. Maybe they were beyond repair this time. Tears fell from her eyes again, she was so sick of crying tears of sadness. The last few days had been such an emotional roller coaster for her. She aggressively wiped the tears away and closed her eyes, if anything would make her feel a smidgen better it would be a nap.

Sadly, sleep eluded Liv; her mind was far too busy with what ifs and had she done it differently. Finally, she turned on the television to just drown out the sound of her head. Thankfully, it helped. It was the dull, monotony that she needed.

It was dusk when Happy decided to make an appearance. He glanced over at Liv before making his way across the room. Happy looked so defeated. Olivia tensed not knowing what to expect from him.

"Hi." She said tentatively, ultimately breaking their battle of silence.

"Hey. How's everything with LL?" Happy's voice was quiet and calm. Too calm.

"He's stable. Dr. Hunnam said that the drugs worked, and I am no longer progressing. He said if LL waits a few more days he will be considered full term, so that is a plus. I am on strict bed rest and will have to stay in the hospital until he is born."

Happy nodded, "That's good news." He sat down in the chair that was next to Liv's bed. He made no effort to engage with her, instead he watched the television.

Olivia adjusted herself so she could face Happy. She knew that she needed to address the elephant in the room. Everything Tig had said to her resonated within her.

"Hap?" She said quietly, it was nearly a whisper. However, it was loud enough for Happy to hear. He turned; his dark brown eyes were so stormy to the point they looked black. Liv took a deep breath, "I am sorry that I didn't tell you about meeting Juice. I am also sorry that I threw the past in your face but most of all I am sorry that I pushed you away."

Happy sighed, he had put up a wall and Liv couldn't read him and that killed her. "I'm sorry that I accused you of cheating. You were right when you said I'd never let you go to Portland if I knew. What I don't understand is why, why did you have to meet with him?" He was surprisingly composed; it worried Olivia. Happy was almost emotionally detached from their conversation and she hated it. She would rather have the overly aggressive Happy, instead of the one who seems too pacified.

Liv chewed her lower lip until it hurt, then she answered. "I needed Juice's forgiveness and to tell him I could no longer have any contact with him."

A growl escaped from Happy's lips and his nostrils flared. There he was. "You don't need his forgiveness Olivia. If anyone should have been asking for absolution, it's him. He betrayed you."

"You're right but I don't need to or care if I forgive him, Hap. I needed him to forgive me for everything that happened while he was in the clutches of Marks and the aftermath of it. After my amnesia everything came back to me for a second time and I saw things so differently. I was no longer in the moment and following the feelings. Those feelings no longer sat right with me. When I tried to work through things with my therapist, we kept coming back to my need for forgiveness. She suggested that I sit down with him and ask him to forgive me. That is what I did, and I immediately felt like the heavy weight I had been carrying around with me was finally lifted off my shoulder." And it still felt that way.

"I am sorry that I hurt us in the process of healing, Hap."

"Do you know ho it felt to get the phone call from Natalie saying you were with Juice in Portland?" Happy stared at Liv, she felt stripped bare, and it was as if he saw into her soul. She was emotionally raw.

"I can only imagine how painful it was." Liv sadly answered. She was surprised that Happy was sharing as much as he was with her. He normally shoved his emotions deep within himself, well other than anger he readily showed that.

"Olivia, it felt like my heart had been retched out of my chest. I was so fucking angry with you. I even thought about screwing around with a few of the Red Woody girls or Croweaters. But then I thought about you and LL and what if what Natalie had told me was wrong. I couldn't do it."

At least he hadn't cheated; Liv was relieved to say the least. He also hadn't run. Liv took Happy's hand into hers.

"I am so sorry Happy. I would be lying if I said that I wish I could take back what I did. What I do wish, is that I went about it differently. I never meant to hurt you or disregard your feelings. Happy, I love you and please…" Liv stopped mid-sentence as a sob escaped her, followed by more tears. GOD DAMN TEARS. "don't hate me or leave me." She gripped Happy's hand as if she were holding on it for her own life depended on it.

"Fuck." Happy muttered under his breath as he moved himself to the bed next to Liv and took her face into his hands. "If I was going to leave you Liv, I would have already done it. I would have walked away the moment I heard that you met Juice. If you were anyone else, I would have said fuck it and walked away. I know you didn't purposely set out to hurt me or us. Unlike Natalie, who purposely called me to hurt you and me in the process. I don't think I will ever understand why you did what you did even if you explained it to me every day for the rest of our lives. So, from this moment forward I never want to mention it or Juice again. Understand?" His rough fingers brushed tears from Liv's eyes.

Liv nodded. "No more. Just us and our family." She whispered as Happy's lips met hers.

"Breath baby. Come on, just work through it." Happy encouraged Liv as she made her way through another wave of contractions.

"Ugh just get him out of me." She growled, her epidural was wearing off and yet again another round of contractions hit her. There was so much pressure and the urgency to push was beginning to hit her hard.

"Alright Liv it looks like you are ready to push." Dr Hunnam smiled up at her and Happy. "You ready to meet your son?"

"Its about time." Liv ground her teeth together as she disregarded the part about LL because she was damn well ready to meet her son. She just wanted him out of her.

"Alright, with your next round of contractions, I need you to bare down and push to the count of five." A nurse appeared at the head of the bed. "Okay Liv, push 1…2…3…4…5… good job."

This cycle went on for another hour. How could it take this long to push out a kid? Liv was losing steam and was beginning to tire. Happy's hand grazed her cheek and she looked over at him, she searched his face, for what? She had no clue.

"Liv, I can see the baby's head, he should be out in a push or two. So let make the next few count." Dr Hunnam said gleefully.

Sadist. Liv thought to herself, how could he be so joyful while she suffered so much.

"Alright baby, push, push." Happy told held her hand as she was hit with the urge.

"Don't tell me to push!" Liv yelled at Happy, she squeezed his hand as tight as she could as she pushed.

"Good job, keep pushing, he is nearly out." A voice said, was it a female or a male Liv had no clue. She really didn't care at that moment.

Liv cried out as she pushed hard; finally, the pressure that was built up between her legs was dispelled. And then she heard the most glorious sound to ever hit her ears. The should of LL's first cry, they immediately placed him on Liv's chest. He had a head full of black hair and was covered in vernix as to be expected. Liv cried in happiness as she held her son for the first time.

"Would you like to cut the cord, Dad?" The nurse asked Happy. Liv smiled up at him. He seemed a bit overwhelmed and she was sure that she saw tears glistening in his eyes.

"Hi baby." Liv cooed at the most beautiful baby she had ever met. He was absolutely perfect. "You are perfect, and I have never loved anyone as much I love you already." Liv kissed the top of her son's head.

The nurse took the baby from Liv to measure, weigh and to assess him; while Liv continued with the fun and not as rewarding part of delivering her placenta. Boy that was a joy, said no one ever. Happy returned with their son in his arms; Liv smiled as she watched him with their son. He surprised her by being a natural with their baby.

"What do you want to name him?" Happy asked as he handed the baby to her to try nursing. They had thrown around a number of names but none of them ever fit.

Liv waited until the nurses had stopped fiddling with the baby and her breast and walked away before answering Happy. "Mason Alexander." Liv murmured as she looked up at Happy. Her way to honor both of her parents.

"Mason Alexander Lowman, I like the sound of it." He smiled.

In that moment of her life, Liv had never felt more complete and more in love. She would have gone through every moment of pain in her life ten times over if it meant she could relive that moment. It was like nothing she ever experienced and she the only way she could describe it was….

… pure, untarnished love.

A/N: Thank you taking time to read this chapter. Sorry if it was a bit heavy. I hope you enjoyed it none the less. Please feel free to leave a comment. 😊 Until next time…Cheers!