Merlin waved to a stunned Malfoy at breakfast the next morning, the blond apparently having thought that he and Ron were going to certainly be caught by Filch last night. Merlin knew that the boy told the caretaker that they would be out. Merlin couldn't have cared less about the Slytherin menace at the moment, though. He was too busy thinking over how his talk with Snape was going to go later that night.

Merlin had finally figured out how to brew his own dreamless sleep potion correctly. He had a few batches already made and bottled up. He just wasn't sure how to tell the professor that he didn't need them anymore without making the man suspicious. That was the last thing that he needed. The Professor already seemed suspicious enough.

Merlin sometimes wondered what both him and the Headmaster thought of him. Merlin had just appeared out of nowhere and drew their attention. They didn't outright interrogate him about who he was but have on many different occasions indirectly made their curiosity known. Merlin, however, didn't dare to reveal anything about who he really was or where he came from.

Another thing that Merlin had to worry about was Samhain. Everyone was calling it Halloween now, but it was still the same day. Merlin had been getting better about not letting the past hurt so much, but with the day drawing nearer, more painful memories haunted him. He thought a lot about Lancelot, the man he usually thought about when this time of year rolled around. There was still quite a bit of guilt he felt when it came to Lancelot and thinking about him led Merlin to thinking about the other knights. It went downhill swiftly after that.

Hermione and Ron had caught him a time or two when he was crying. He was usually able to stay out of sight when his feeling began to slip out of control, but he was caught off guard every now and then. Sometimes a name, a phrase, a sound, something he sees, or anything for that matter, could remind him so intensely of his real home, that it crushed through Merlin's already fragile and childlike defenses.

That was something else that plagued Merlin. Sure, he found a way to get around him nightmares and dreams at night, he was even getting better at avoiding flashbacks during the day, but it was difficult to pull himself together and keep it that way. Mentally and memory-wise, Merlin was a fully capable adult. Physically and emotionally, he was an eleven-year-old kid. He found it awkward at time physically, but he could cope. Besides, he wasn't all that coordinated to begin with either. Emotionally was where he was struggling. He could find a way to keep everything in check all the time. He tried very hard, though, and even tried out meditation.

Two months since the beginning of the term, Merlin still felt like he was drowning. He did, however, find that distractions brought relief. So, he poured himself into his studies and spending time with other people — mainly Ron and Hermione. This resulted in him having good days and bad days.

So far, today was a good day. he woke up feeling refreshed and still feeling some of the excitement he felt from having narrowly avoided a run in with Filch the night before. He was currently having breakfast with Ron, Hermione, and Neville. He was feeling good.

Hermione at first seemed to be still mad about the night before, but apparently couldn't stay that way for long which made Merlin happy.

Owls flooded the Great Hall as usual. It was another day that went by without any mail for him, but unlike some students, that didn't bother him at all. It wasn't like he was expecting anything.

The rest of the day passed without anything noteworthy happening. Malfoy continuously kept shooting him dark looks, but the Slytherin boy didn't approach him or say anything about the events last night.

Later during dinner, Hermione and Ron were bickering again. Her and Ron still had some difficulties. She would give a negative comment about him, and he would reply with a rude remark every now and then. Sometimes if irritated Merlin, other times he was amused, but right now, he was confused.

"Why do you two keep hanging around each other when you two obviously don't get along that well?"

The two in question turned towards him with a mixture look of bewilderment and embarrassment.

"I'm your friend, Morgan, and if that means having to be with Hermione too, then so be it," Ron said as if he didn't understand why Merlin didn't already know that.

"The same goes for me. Also, I suppose that Ron isn't all that bad," Hermione said before returning to her conversation with the redhead.

Their answers resonated with Merlin, mobilizing him. It was like something inside him was switched on, and he looked at the two people across the table from him and started to see them the way they saw him — as a friend. For the first time since he had arrived here, he was actually okay with having friends. He no longer felt like he was letting go or betraying those that he knew in Camelot.

A thought then stuck him that he was starting to move on — just like Snape was wanting him to do. He wasn't even close to being completely okay, but it was one step. Also, he finally knew what he was going to say to the Potion's Master later that evening.

Merlin strolled through the dungeon hallways and walked straight into Snape's office, not even bothering to knock. The Professor was used to Merlin's lack of manners when it came to him entering a room, but he never failed to show his exasperation every time it happened.

After a long sigh, Snape, using the end of his quill, pointed to the full potion bottle at the corner of his desk, not even speaking or looking up from the parchment he was grading.

"Actually, I came here tonight to tell you that I think I'm going to stop taking them now," Merlin said, winning the full attention of the man.

"Really?" Snape drawled, disbelief in his voice. "And why has this suddenly come about?"

"I've been thinking about it for a while," Merlin lied. "I think I am doing much better now."

"And what might that be?"

"I have friends," Merlin stated simply.

Snape raised an eyebrow. "And you just suddenly have someone that you can open up to and talk with?"

"Well, not really," Merlin said before he realized it.

"What do you mean?"

Merlin hesitated for a moment. He knew that he couldn't really say anything to Snape, but he was beginning to feel the pressure of all he was having to keep secret again. He longed for an outlet, someone like Gaius, who he could talk freely with about almost anything, especially his troubles.

Deciding it was worth the risk, Merlin began to talk.

"The thing is, I can't really tell anybody anything. Save for a very small number of people, I never have been. And the people that I could be that way with are dead. There gone and now I am alone."

"There are people here at the school that are willing to listen and help. Don't you see that?" Snape said, moving around him desk to stand closer to him.

"It's not like I don't want to tell anyone anything," Merlin said, unwanted tears burning his eye. "I would have always loved to be completely honest and myself with everyone and to have been able to not have to constantly lie to almost everyone I knew, including my best friend. I can't, though, and I still can't."

"Why not?"

"Back then it meant death," Merlin laughed bitterly. "Now, it possibly means something worse."

Silence filled the office. Merlin knew that he shouldn't have said anything, but it felt so good to tell somebody what he was going though even if it was only just a sampling of it without any real detail. He felt like he could breathe better now that some of the weight was lifted off his chest. In the long run, he probably just created so many more problems for himself, but all he focused on at that moment was his easy breaths.

"Hogwarts is a safe place. If you are scared of something, you don't have to be here," Snape tried.

Merlin could have applauded the man. He didn't know if Snape cared for Merlin's benefit or for some alterative motive, but the man was trying and doing a good job at it too.

"Yes, but sadly, I doubt that applies to me," Merlin responded. "Can I go now?"

The Professor nodded.

Snape walked into Dumbledore's office. Most of the portraits that littered the walls were already fast asleep, but the Headmaster was working away at his desk.

"Hello, Severus," he said. "What can I do for you."

"It's about Morgan Emrys," Snape replied, causing the man to look up from his stack of papers.

"Why don't we find somewhere more comfortable to sit," Albus said, conjuring two armchairs.

They both sat down, and Dumbledore motioned for Snape to continue.

"Emrys came into my office earlier. Instead of picking up his sleeping draught like usual, he instead told me that he no longer needed it. When I asked why, he responded by saying that it was because he had friends that were helping him out."

"That is good," the Headmaster said, nodding his head.

"Except it is not actually how you think it is. After some probing, the boy seemed to break down and spilled that he isn't telling them anything and he is keeping things about himself a secret not because he wants to, it's because he can't. Albus, this boy is absolutely terrified of what will happen if he lets loose whatever he is hiding. He said that he couldn't tell anyone before coming here on fear of death, and now that he is here, it's worse."

Albus' face grew dark, considering the possibilities of what that meant.

"What are you thinking?" the headmaster asked.

"I've gotten in touch with some of my old contacts. There does seem to be some movement with a few Death Eaters. There isn't anything concrete, but I do know something. There is a rumor that the Dark Lord is on the rise and moving around."

"The stone?"

"I am certain that it was him behind the break in at Gringotts."

Albus folded his hands in front of him and started into black space, deep in thought.

"And you now think that Morgan Emrys has a connection with this?"

"I'm not sure what I think," Snape answered truthfully. "It would certainly explain his fear of letting people know."

"Perhaps he was an unwilling participant," Dumbledore suggested.

"I certainly can't see Emrys aligning his beliefs with that of the Dark Lord," Snape said, thinking back to how the boy reacted when he first met Draco at Diagon Alley. Emrys made no attempt to hide is beliefs about to equality of wizards and muggles.

"He certainly is an enigma. For now, we don't have any real reason to believe that he is anything but harmless, though."

"So, we continue to do nothing?"

Albus shook his head in disagreement and leaned forward in his seat, eyes boring into his own. "We continue to keep vigilant. Watch him closely, keep communicating with your contacts. I have a feeling that something is going to be happening soon, and I want to be ready for when it unfolds."

Samhain began with Merlin waking up to the delicious smell of baking pumpkin bread wafting through the corridors. He promised himself that he was going to make the most out of the day.

In Charms class, Flitwick had decided that they were ready to start making objects fly. Merlin was astonished that it took them this long to even get to the subject. He could make things fly before he could walk. It made him seriously consider how weak magic had come to be.

Merlin ended up getting paired with another Gryffindor in his year, Seamus. He hadn't really spoken must to the boy. Sure, they had some conversations. It was hard not to when you shared a room with someone, but Seamus usually stuck to just handing out with Dean, another first-year Gryffindor.

Ron and Hermione were paired together, and as usual, they were having difficulties with one another. Hermione needed to recognize there was a difference between being smart and imposing that on others. Ron needed to put more effort into his studies and not take everything to heart. Fortunately, the class ended without any major incidents.

As the day drew to a close, Merlin the emotional weight of the day got heavier. Deciding to forgo the feast, he headed down to the edge of the lake. Both Ron and Hermione wanted to go with him so that he wouldn't be alone, but he declined their offer, stating that he just needed some time alone.

At the edge of the lake, he conjured a small, hand sized raft and let it float out into the water. Once it was far enough away, he set fire to it and bowed his head as a way to pay tribute to not only Lancelot but all of the others he had lost.

"I miss you all," he whispered.

The sun had set, and it was growing dark, so he headed back inside the castle. He came to a stop outside the shut doors of the Great Hall. A cacophony of chatter drifted from the room. Merlin briefly considered going in to join his friends but couldn't bring himself to do it, preferring to spend some more time alone. He roamed the halls aimlessly.

The smell hit him first. It was a foul stench of old socks and an uncleaned chamber pot. Then came a low growl. Merlin turned to see a horrible sight. Twelve feet tall, its skin was a dull, granite gray, its great lumpy body like a boulder with its small bald head perched on top like a coconut. It had shot legs thick as tree trunks with flat, horny feet. The smell coming from it was incredible. It was holding a huge wooden club, which dragged alone the floor because its arms were so long.

The creature reminded him of Lady Catrina, who once bewitched Uther almost into marring her. Before him was undoubtedly a troll, but he was huge and not at all intelligent looking as he lumbered closer towards Merlin.

"Don't come any closer," Merlin warned, taking a step back. To his surprise, he voice didn't waiver. He was not at all nervous. Sure, his heart began to beat faster, but it was adrenaline that flooded his body. He was used to danger. It felt like home to him.

Either due to lack of caring or lack of understanding, the troll continued towards him, lifting up his club as he got ready to strike.

Merlin did the first thing he could think of and raise his hand up. The troll was hit with a wave of magic, sending it flying backwards down the corridor and into a wall a great distance away. The impact damaged the stone wall, and the troll slid down into a heap on the floor.

Merlin rushed over to the fallen troll. A quick inspection proved that it was unconscious but not dead.

Loud footsteps diverted his attention to a trio of professors hurrying his way. They must have heard the loud crash. Professor McGonagall was the first to arrive, closely followed by Snape, with Quirrell bringing up the rear. Quirrell took one look at the troll, let out a faint whimper, and sat quickly down on the floor, clutching his heart. Merlin had a hard time believing the man used to be highly regarded in the defense against the dark arts field. The man was a nervous wreck.

Snape bent over the troll, examining it closely. Professor McGonagall was looking very concerned and very angry.

Merlin spoke before she could. He wasn't nervous taking on the control, but talking with them, he was.

"I didn't mean to do it," he said quickly. "It was coming at me and left me no choice."

She opened her mouth to speak but once again was beaten to it, this time by Snape.

"And what were you doing down here with the troll in the first place? You should have gone straight to your dormitory from the Great Hall with your housemates."

"He didn't go to the feast, Severus," McGonagall interjected. "Mister Weasley and Miss Granger informed me that he didn't attend. They ran up to me with concerns of his safety when they heard of the news of the troll. They wanted to come find them their selves, but I expressly forbade it."

"And why didn't you attend the feast," Snape questioned.

Merlin bowed his head. "I just wanted to spend the night alone."

"Minerva, if you and Quirinus would take care of the troll and inform the Headmaster, I'll escort young Minster Emrys back to his dorm. Do be careful. The troll appears to only be unconscious."

McGonagall gave a curt nod and Quirrell another whimper.

Snape grabbed Emrys' elbow and guided him through the castle towards his office.

"Um, the Gryffindor tower is the other way," the boy said.

"I am aware," Snape drawled. "I wish to speak with you before letting you off."

Once there, Snape directed Emrys to the chair before the desk and decided to just lean against the desk instead of sitting himself.

"Now spill," he demanded.

"Sir?"

Snape huffed in annoyance.

"Why did you skip the feast? Seeing as how that action put your life in danger, I'm deeming it imperative that I know the reason why."

The boy dropped his gaze and instead focused intently on the floor. He didn't speak.

"I'm not letting you leave until I get an answer, so I suggest you answer me and don't lie."

The boy glanced up briefly before looking back at the floor. He opened his mouth and then closed it, obviously having an internal struggle.

"Sa… I mean Halloween," he began, "is just a difficult day for me. I wanted to be alone and went for a walk."

Snape sighed, but on the inside, he was pleased. He got the boy talking. Now, he just needed for it to continue. He pulled up a chair and sat down in front of him. Leaning forward to eye level with him.

"Why is today a difficult day for you?" he asked.

Emrys hesitated. Getting information out of him was like pulling teeth is seemed.

"I lost a friend a few years back on this day. A really good friend…" Emrys broke down crying.

Snape sat there uncomfortable. He didn't know what to do. He was not one for comforting on consoling. Instead, he decided to press on.

"How did he die?"

"He died saving others," he said, wiping his eyes angerly. "He was brave and kind. He didn't deserve to have died. I wish that it was me. I tried. I really did. But apparently I am too damn important."

So, there was something special about Morgan Emrys.

"Why are you important?" Snape asked, desperately wanting the answer. However, he was disappointed.

"I honestly don't know. I wish I did."

Albus and Minerva were discussing the troll incident when Severus walked into the Headmasters office.

"I trust that Mister Emrys is softly back in the Gryffindor tower?" Albus asked.

"Yes," Snape answered.

"And what news do you have?"

Snape took a seat before he answered. "The boy is beginning to open up more. It is very obvious that he has been through a great deal and has been severely affected by it. I think his inability to talk to anyone about it is giving him a lot of distress."

Albus nodded his head. "Minerva?"

"I don't know what spell he used against the troll, but it was powerful magic, I can assure you. The troll appeared to have been thrown back and into a wall hard enough to cause some extensive damage. I have never known a student, let alone a first-year, to be able to take on a troll."

The mystery of Morgan Emrys just kept growing. The more information Albus collected, the more questions he had.

"What have you found?" Severus asked.

"I've had a few people comb through where we found the boy. They found nothing out of the usual. It was as if he was just dropped of there. I have gotten in contact with every Arthur I could find, and none of them have any connection to him. All I have is a bunch of dead ends. Perhaps it is time that I talk to him myself."

Please leave a review.