How High They Fly.
A poem by Ḿ̴̮̗̈́̚o̴̪̥͙͐̇̑̓̌͘n̵͈͇̫̤̒̊̋̚i̸̧͔͉͈͓̹͒̔̅k̴̢̛͖͂̈̌̕a̵̡̪̼̥̠͙͐͐̂̂
–
I smile wide as I peer inside the little cage on my rooftop, and what do I see? Four little pigeons. Four little pigeons staring back at me.
Four little pigeons of varying shape and size. Four little pigeons looking at me with their beady eyes.
Each set of their feathers are made of many different colors. One is purple. The others pink, blond and brown. Their little wings flapping wildly as they skitter around.
With a heavy heart, I sigh as my smile leaves my face, as I know that today… Today is the day they must leave this place.
I took them in long ago. Found them collapsed on the hard ground, their wings broken and unable to move. But more than that, I saw the hurt in their souls. For they were trapped on the ground, unable to reach their goals.
"To take to the sky!" They said to me. "We want to fly far! Fly fast! Be wild and free!"
"Why don't you?" I asked inquisitively.
"Our wings have been broken for so long, we forgot how" They say to me simply.
I giggled as I felt empathy for them. I took the birds in my arms, sheltering and protecting them from anything that seeks to bring harm.
"Don't worry, my little feathered friends" I said affectionately, like a mother to her frightened child. "I shall heal your wounds and teach you to fly. With my help, your only limit will be the sky"
And take them in, I did. Gave them my home and even my love. I cleaned, fed and cared for them for so long. I showed them the way and taught them right from wrong.
Now came the day I slowly began to dread. The day where they'd leave me, and pursue their dream instead. I sighed nervously as I opened the cage, the little birds stepping out, their wings spread wide, ready to engage.
I stand aside as I watch them soar to the sky, the beauty of their flight bringing a tear to my eye. Like a mother watching her child grow, I weep. For as much as I wanted them, these birds were not mine to keep.
My heart is heavy, yes. But the pain in overshadowed by my pride, as I watch my little birds soar and dive, my tears long since dried.
I choose to stay for just a little while. Stay and watch as I slowly begin to smile, my eyes glued to the sky.
And I watch.
Watch how high they fly.
"…"
"I'm so proud of them. So proud of what I had done for them. So proud of the space I had created for them before… Before everything went wrong. Before I lost myself. Before I became enraged and insane, driven feral by the power within me"
"I've been thinking about them a lot more recently. Thinking about what could have been if I never became the monster I was"
"Lately, I've been having… dreams. Or at least I call them dreams. In reality, they're more like triggered visions"
"If I focus really hard. Think about them very intensely… I can almost see them. I can almost hear their voices. I can almost see their faces. I can almost feel their presence. It's faint. Very faint, but it's there"
"I don't really know if these are in fact them… or just my own mind playing cruel tricks on me, forcing me to have visions and hallucinations of them, be it as a way of torturing and punishing me for my vile actions… or as a way of reminding me why I'm here in the first place. I don't know"
"All I know is this, I miss them all so much. I'd give anything just to spend one, only one day with them again"
"Anything…"
The air was unnaturally heavy inside the halls of the school. Thick too, making it near impossible for Aaron to breath as he followed his club members from behind, Sayori, Natsuki, Yuri and himself returning to the club room, ready but not exactly willing to conduct their scheduled performance, looks of pure anxiety, nervousness and even a small amount of dread on their faces.
Aaron couldn't really blame their sudden shift in behavior. Their randomly obtained cold feet. He was honestly feeling the same thing within himself.
After what had happened with Yuri and him… It hit everyone really hard for some reason. To them, it felt as if the entire atmosphere of the school had shifted. Changed. Morphed from energetic, excitable and positive to… something else. Something that felt… uncomfortable. Very uncomfortable. Menacing even. So much so that Aaron as well as everyone else felt as if they didn't want to be here anymore.
The enthusiasm and confidence from before. The contentment and happiness. The camaraderie and friendship… it was all gone. Vanished in an instant, only to be replaced with discomfort, anxiety, nervousness and even a little fear.
Sayori wouldn't stop frowning as she looked down at her shoes, Aaron thinking she would collapse to the floor and burst into tears at any second. Natsuki was twitching, abrasively crossing her arms, gripping them tightly in the process as she mumbled unintelligible noises of frustration to herself.
And Yuri… Aaron didn't have the courage to look at Yuri. Didn't have the strength to look her in the eyes. Not after all of that.
What… What happened? Honestly, the details were near impossible to recall. This may sound stereotypical and cliché, but it all happened so fast for Aaron. Too fast. One moment, he's trying to help a dear friend with her insecurities, and then the next, he's being bent over the rooftop's railing before having his mouth sucked!
Ouch… His back hurt a little from that, the force Yuri brought down on him being too much for his spine to handle.
That kiss back there… If Aaron was to be honest, it was his first. Many of his firsts, actually. The first time he's ever had a woman so close to his body. The first time he's ever called someone genuinely beautiful. The first time he's ever kissed someone.
Though he had trouble recalling the initial encounter, he remembered how it felt. Even now, when she's behind him, her head downcast, her face hidden by her hair as she slowly and cautiously follows the group, Aaron could still feel Yuri on his chest.
Could still feel the phantom of her on him. Her touch. The way her hands glided and caressed his chest. The way her curves felt in his hands. The way her lips bonded with his. The warmth in them… It was all still there, as if they never stopped their embrace.
That made Aaron shiver a little bit, and not in the good way. While he initially enjoyed the experience of his first kiss, the aftertaste of it just felt… wrong. Unnatural. Uncomfortable. Unsafe even, especially after seeing the reactions from his fellow members.
This was nothing like what Aaron had read about. Nothing like that at all. Wasn't a boy's first kiss supposed to feel more… magical? Like, it was supposed to feel good, right? Wasn't it supposed to feel euphoric? Orgasmic even? Wasn't it supposed to overwhelm his senses and send him on the ultimate pleasure trip, only to leave him addicted and begging for more?
If so, why did it only feel like a weight had been placed on Aaron's shoulders? Why did it feel so heavy and burdening? Why did it bring such misery, pain and sadness onto his fellow members and even the girl he kissed?!
Why… Why did Aaron feel like what happened was wrong?
The questions went unanswered as the group approached the club room, seeing the many desks from inside stacked up neatly and carefully against the wall next to the door, moved out of the room by the literature club yesterday so they could have more room for their performance.
On the other side of the wall was a poster advertising the performance, alongside a fairly large line of people, ranging from first year students to even faculty members leaning against the wall, waiting patiently for the literature club's arrival.
"W-Wow… Big turnout" Sayori gulped in nervousness as she looked at the line, both impressed by and slightly scared of how many people would be seeing the performance. She honestly expected twenty or maybe thirty students, not forty! At least that's in the range of how many she thought there were. Counting them was… difficult. "J-Just one minute, everyone! We need a few seconds to prepare. Please, be patient!" She announced as she opened the door, her and her club members entering the recently decorated club room.
It was dark. Incredibly dark, per Yuri's instructions. The entire room being lit by the many tiny candles strewn about the floor, tables and windowsills, all of them only dimly lighting the room, the most illuminated area being the front, where the chalkboard was, which was now the literature club's stage to perform on, identified by the small bar stool and a small stand typically used to hold music sheets.
At the back of the room were exactly twenty five chairs, all neatly and evenly spread out, each holding one of the little wooden boards Sayori ordered from the woodcarver, every one having either Sayori's, Natsuki's, Aaron's or Yuri's poems carved into them.
The smell of jasmine was prominent in the air, periodically spraying from the small fragrance dispenser mounted to the wall, Yuri's aromatherapy idea. According to her, it would be helpful in creating a calm and relaxed environment. Aaron wasn't an expert on that stuff though, so he couldn't really say if that was true or just a placebo effect. Well, at least it made the room smell nice.
And of course, on a small table to the side were four trays of the cupcakes Natsuki had made, spanning almost every different color and flavor imaginable. You name it, Natsuki baked a cupcake of it. She even put little candies in the frosting, to give it that extra bit of sugary goodness. Of course, a few of the cupcakes were missing, due to Sayori and Aaron having one or two… or six each before setting them all out, Natsuki definitely annoyed by that after doing a count of them all.
"Here. You may wanna use this" She said to Aaron as she handed him a napkin, causing him to look at her with confusion. "You've got a little… You know. On your lips" Natsuki added as she pointed, Aaron using the napkin to wipe his mouth, seeing it stained bright purple afterward, Yuri's lipstick having left its mark behind on Aaron. "Purple is like, so not your color, sweetheart! You're more of a light pink kinda guy" Natsuki joked, chuckling a little to herself, Aaron sighing at that as he sat down on one of the chairs, his hands holding his head.
"What? Was it something I said?" Natsuki asked, thinking he'd laugh with her.
"N-No. No, it's not you. I just… I've got a lot on my mind right now. Sorry" Aaron sighed.
"Hey. Um… About the punching you thing… I'm sorry" Natsuki apologized. "I really just did it for Sayori. I thought if I roughed you up a bit, she'd laugh or something. I dunno. No hard feelings?"
"The way she looked at me… Why?"
"I dunno. I mean, I know you two are like brother and sister and all but… Seeing you kiss Yuri like that… I think you really messed her up" Natsuki guessed, trying her hardest to intemperate why a single kiss got under Sayori's skin so much.
In Natsuki's case, she could write a whole book filled with reasons why seeing Yuri and Aaron like that would piss her off, which it did… slightly. But Sayori wasn't Natsuki, as in, the two didn't think the same way. So the reason it angered Natsuki most likely was not the reason why it angered Sayori. And no! It wasn't because Natsuki had a thing for Aaron or anything like that!
I mean, come on! Him? With her? He fucking wishes! Natsuki would never make it a thing though. Not even if they were the last two people on earth! Not even if her life depended on it!
Well… If the circumstances were that great… She'd give it some thought. But it'd be a long thought! A big decision.
"Maybe she's just weirded out by the idea of you having a girlfriend? You know, like the same way one of those clingy mothers and sisters are. Those whole I'm the only woman you need in your life kinda people. Something like that. Why didn't you tell us you and Yuri were a thing anyway?" Natsuki asked, her hands on her hips as she looked down at Aaron, him still sitting on the chair, his face in his hands.
"Because we weren't! It just… It just happened" He stated, trying his best to explain. Trying being an understatement. He couldn't even think of the right words for it. "It was like, one moment, I'm telling her how strong she is, the next? I get bent over the railing and she… kisses me" He explained, his fingers lingering on his lips as he felt the phantom of her kiss again.
"Oh god. You went for that route? You stroked her ego so much, she started making out with you? Nice!" Natsuki chuckled slightly. "Let me guess. You went for the whole stereotypical You're a strong, independent woman who don't need no man! route, right? Just telling her what she wanted to hear?"
"N-No! I didn't say that! Well, I did. But not like that. I just… You should have heard the way she talked about herself. The venom in her voice. I've never seen someone hate who they are that much. It was almost like she was ashamed to even exist, you know? I… I had to say something" Aaron stated, sighing deeply as he did so. "I guess I came off as too intense and overwhelmed her or something. I dunno! Women are weird!" He shouted loudly as he stood up, frustration obvious in his voice.
"Yeah… Yeah, we're pretty weird" Natsuki sighed as well as Aaron sat back down, her taking the seat next to him as her hand moved to pat his back supportively, making him feel a little better. "Don't worry about it too much. I'm sure this'll all blow over later and everything will be back to normal. We'll just look back and laugh" She added. "Don't let it hit you too hard, okay?"
"Yeah… Okay"
"Okay. Okay, everyone. Deep breaths. We can do this!" Sayori said nervously as she approached Aaron and Natsuki, the two looking up at her to see her eyes closed as she breathed in and out deeply, only to then begin making odd and disturbing noises with her mouth and lips, almost as if she was doing some sort of makeshift vocal exercise. "Alright then! Let's get to work, guys!" She said energetically as a large smile came to her face, Aaron and Natsuki taken aback by the sudden change in her behavior.
A few seconds ago, she looked like she was ready to break down and cry, now she looked happier than a kid in a toy store who stole his mother's credit card!
It was actually kinda scary how easy it seemed for Sayori to change her mood. It was instantaneous. Immediate. Like the flick of a light switch. The click of a button. Bamn! Frown turned upside down! Happy thoughts all around! Like she did it on a daily basis.
That thought scared Natsuki. Aaron more so.
"Are… Are you okay?" Natsuki asked cautiously.
"Hm? Yeah, I'm fine. I feel great, actually! Why?" Sayori asked obliviously, her unnaturally happy smile still on her face, seeming to grow wider by the second as she looked down at Aaron and Natsuki, her head tilting slightly to the side.
"No reason…" Natsuki dropped it.
"Well then, what are you two sittin' around for?! Up! Up! Up, lazybones! You can get chummy on the walk home! It's time to go to work!" Sayori said cheerfully. Almost too cheerfully, to the point where it felt forced, Natsuki and Aaron looking at each other in an attempt to confirm that they were both seeing the same thing. "Okay. So I was thinking I'd go first. Then Natsuki. Then Aaron and finally… Yuri" She hesitated on the last name, almost as if she didn't want to say Yuri's name, eventually forcing it out of her mouth. "Yuri! Yuri? Where's Yuri?" Sayori asked as she looked around, finding out that Yuri wasn't even in the room to begin with. "Hmm… We lost Yuri. Oh well! Guess it's just us three performing!"
"I'm here! I'm over here! Don't start without me!" Yuri shouted as she burst through the club room's door, panting like she'd ran a mile, the warmth of her turtleneck sweater definitely being one of the reasons why Aaron could see sweat on her brow. "S-Sorry. I was in the bathroom. I… I had business to take care of. Private business" She explained, reluctantly taking a step inside, one of her hands gripping her arm tightly, stroking it up and down slowly, Yuri's teeth oddly gritting as she let out a small, nearly silent grunt. Like she was in pain or something, Aaron showing concern as he noticed that.
"Good! I thought you walked out on us" Sayori stated.
"Wha-What? N-No! I would never! I swear!" Yuri said immediately, panic in her voice as Sayori's rather rude assumption was thrown at her. "I-I thought you'd give me more credit than that. After all the hard work we all put in together, I wouldn't leave you all to face this on your own! Did… Did you really think I'd just run away?" She asked in a hurt tone, Sayori simply smiling at that and turning around, directing her attention to something else.
"Honestly, I wouldn't put it past you. But you're here now! And that's what matters! Now then, let's all try extra hard to give one hundred and ten percent tonight, okay? Say it with me now! Go literature club!" Sayori cheered gleefully, pumping her fist in the air, Aaron, Natsuki and Yuri looking at her with confusion, never seeing her act like this before "Okay… let's try that again. Go, literature club!" She did it again.
"Um… Go, literature club?" Aaron humored her reluctantly.
"Great energy, Aaron!" Sayori praised, her tone filled with artificial pride and patronization, like an elementary school teacher handing out gold stars, making Aaron, Yuri and Natsuki cringe slightly. "Alright. I'll open the door and get everyone inside. Natsuki, you start handing out the cupcakes!" Sayori commanded as she cheerfully skipped to the door, Natsuki immediately standing up and walking to the table, picking up a tray to hand out her confectionery creations.
"Make yourselves useful and help me, please?" She asked politely to Aaron and Yuri, the two walking over and grabbing the rest of the trays, Sayori opening the door widely as all the students lined up outside began pouring in.
"Hi! Hello! Welcome to the literature club! Please, take a seat! Have a cupcake! The performance will be starting soon!" Sayori greeted loudly after opening the door, waving and smiling at everyone as they entered the room, taking their seats, the quiet room now abuzz with conversations, talks and whispers by the audience. Sadly, there weren't enough chairs for everyone, leaving some guests to either stand or sit on the floor.
"Natsuki…" Yuri tapped lightly on Natsuki's shoulder as the two passed out cupcakes, Natsuki turning around to look at her, a small scowl on her face, though Yuri didn't take it seriously. Natsuki scowls at pretty much everyone when she's under stress. Yuri didn't expect tonight to be any sort of exception from that sort of behavior. "Can I talk to you in private for a second?" She asked, Natsuki sighing in annoyance, rolling her eyes as she passed the entire tray of cupcakes to one of the guests.
"Take one and pass it down" She instructed, the guest doing as told, taking one cupcake out of the bunch and passing the tray down the row of chairs. "Okay. Fine" She huffed as she agreed to Yuri's request, the two moving through the club room's door and into the hallway outside.
"Is… Is everything okay with Sayori? She seems… a little off tonight" Yuri stated worriedly as Natsuki leaned against the hallway wall, her arms crossed as usual. "Is she alright? I'd ask her myself but… I think she's angry with me. Is she?" Yuri added, the worry on her face growing more prominent at the idea of the club president being furious with her.
Even though Sayori had to be the most passive, kindest and downright sweetest girl Yuri had ever met, just the thought of having invoked her fury sent dreadful chills down her spine, making Yuri shiver in fear.
In terms of hierarchy, Sayori was at the top of the pecking order. The boss of the operation. The president! She had ultimate and near invincible authority over everything and everyone in the club! If she really wanted to, she could single handedly turn Yuri's life into a living hell. She could do whatever she wanted to Yuri and nobody would really be in a position to stop her.
Sayori could assign Yuri mountains upon mountains of menial labor and useless tasks for days on end, relishing in the satisfaction she could gain by abusing her power to mistreat her fellow member, watching with glee as she forced the poor girl to work herself to death, simply because in terms of authority, Yuri was an inferior. A lesser. A goon. A henchman. A slave to be ordered around by her master.
This would be doubly so if Sayori went the extra mile and removed Yuri's status as vice president, insuring that her club member would be literally powerless.
Maybe Sayori would just skip all that and kick Yuri out of the club immediately. Banish and expel her from the one place in the whole school that she actually enjoyed being in. The one moment in her days that she actually looked forward to. The one place she could let go in and just enjoy her reading and the company of her friends… All that taken away just because she angered the wrong person.
The thought terrified Yuri. Genuinely terrified her. It terrified her more than having a gun to her head. More than having a knife to her back. More than being abducted by some stranger on the street, taken to God knows where.
To be left alone again… trapped in her solitude, too afraid to try and find a new place for herself. That was a pain she wasn't ready to return to. A dark place she never wished to revisit.
Aaron and Natsuki would obviously object to her mistreatment, were it to come to that, regardless of their own personal thoughts of Yuri. They'd simply stand up to the president on principle alone. But honestly, what would stop Sayori from doing the same to them? Nothing really.
The school board doesn't like to get involved with club affairs, even when bullying and abuse was a concern. And the student council are too dismissive of the smaller clubs like literature. So ultimately, Sayori couldn't be stopped were she to turn malevolent.
"I… I just want to make sure I didn't agitate her in any way" Yuri said, her breathing light yet frantic, her lips slightly quivering in fear as she thought of the suffering her superior could inflict upon her. "She… She isn't angry, right?"
"I dunno. Then again, after what you did, why should she be?" Natsuki asked, a venomous attitude in her voice, more hostile than usual. Normally, Yuri takes such hostility on the chin, par for the course when dealing with Natsuki. But this time… This time, she didn't take it so well, Natsuki glaring with such intensity, Yuri was afraid she'd outright attack her! Pounce on her like a vicious animal!
"E-Excuse me? You're not implying she's acting like this because of me, are you?" Yuri asked, offended that Natsuki would so quickly throw the blame on her without so much as even hearing Yuri's side of the story.
"Wow! You got short term memory loss or something? She spends the entire week, working on this stupid little performance that, honestly, isn't going to do shit to get us new members, and when she just wants to relax and spend time with her friends, you drag one away to the rooftop and start making out with him!" Natsuki explained, her color commentary not easing Yuri in the slightest. "Worst of all, you made out with her childhood friend! Childhood! That's like… sleeping with some dude's wife or something!"
"It's… It's nothing like that! Nothing at all!" Yuri stated loudly, not buying into such a poor comparison. "And no! I didn't drag him away! He came to me!"
"Oh really? So, how long has he been 'coming to you' exactly? A week? Two weeks? A month?! The day after he joined the club?!" Natsuki asked, the two practically shouting at each other at this point, the volume more than loud enough to be heard from within the club room.
"What? What are you even talking about?" Yuri asked in confusion.
"Oh my god! I have to spell out everything for your slow ass! How long have you and lover boy back there been a thing?! You two were having some secret romance behind our backs, weren't you?!" Natsuki accused.
"N-No! No, of course not! He just…" Yuri grunted as she turned around, crossing her arms as she showed her back to Natsuki, sighing as her head sank. "I wasn't… feeling right. He saw that and just tried to comfort me. It was… It got a little too intense and… I lost control. That's all! It was the heat of the moment! The whole thing was just one big accident! I swear!" She tried to explain, Natsuki snickering at that.
"Accident or not, you should have had more self control!" She scolded. "Look… There are just some things you can't do to certain people. Sadly, Aaron was one of those people. Come on! This is all in the girl code, Woman! The girl code! You should have known this like the back of your hand since like, birth or something!"
"Girl code? What the fuck does that even mean?!" Yuri cursed, angry that Natsuki would use such a pathetic excuse. "I don't even see why there's so much outrage over this. So I kissed Aaron. Big deal! It's not like Sayori had her name written all over him!"
"How do you know? Did you stop to check?!" Natsuki jabbed spitefully, Yuri gasping in shock at that, basically being accused of seeing Aaron naked!
"Why are you attacking me like this? Who's side are you even on?!"
"I'm on the side that doesn't hate me!" She yelled loudly, Yuri going silent as she heard that, her eyes widening in shock as her hands cautiously covered her mouth. "I'm on the side that doesn't think I'm some… immature little kid who doesn't know what she's talking about! I'm on the side that isn't yelling at me constantly over everything I do! I'm on the side of whoever bothers to actually take me seriously!"
"You… You think I hate you?" Yuri asked, her voice immediately turning quiet. Timid. Weak as she felt an odd pang of guilt in her chest, looking at Natsuki with hurt on her face. She couldn't really tell for sure, but it looked like Natsuki was holding back tears, her rant being so emotionally driven, to the point where she would probably start crying should she continue. "I don't hate you. I don't think you're immature. I don't yell at you over everything you do. I… I'm your friend, Natsuki"
"Don't lie to me…" Was all Natsuki would say as she turned around, walking back into the club room, Yuri lingering in the hallway, her mind so overwhelmed by the exchange, that her body forgot how to move! Leaving her standing there, motionless outside the club room, that look of sadness and hurt still present on her face as she just… stared off into oblivion, unable to comprehend what was happening around her.
Did… Did Natsuki really think Yuri saw her like that? Did she really think Yuri hated her? Did she really think Yuri saw her as nothing more than an idiot child? Something to just yell and scream at? To punish and scold over nothing?
Did she really think Yuri didn't take her seriously?
"Knock knock! Anyone home?" Sayori shouted loudly as she knocked gently on Yuri's forehead, treating it like a simple door, the light impact snapping Yuri out of her daze, Sayori staring at her oddly. "Oh, there you are! Welcome back to planet earth!" She giggled, still being unnaturally cheerful and happy. "We heard shouting and Natsuki came back looking really sad. You didn't hurt her, did you?" She asked.
"What? No! I would never!" Yuri denied vehemently.
"Oh… Good! I was just worried you were being mean to her again. I know it just happens and you don't go out of your way to do it, but your words hit her pretty hard sometimes. Harder than me or Aaron could ever hit. She really cares about how you see her, even if she won't admit it. You know, sometimes she goes out of her way to impress you too! Only for you to tilt your nose up and disregard her. Not a very nice thing to do, if you ask me" Sayori stated, giving Yuri insight over just how much damage she could do to Natsuki. "I just wanted to make sure you didn't hurt her feelings. I can't have my club members being sad and angry all the time" Sayori added, giggling slightly. "No, no. This is a happy place! Filled with happy thoughts! Everyone happy and friendly all the time! We don't like having those awful little rain clouds ruining our happy rays of sunshine! Right, Vice President?"
"Umm… Right" Yuri said as she hung her head low. "Sayori… Natsuki doesn't think I hate her, does she?" She asked, Sayori simply smiling widely at that.
"Let's just get back to work, okay? We can all talk about this later" Sayori dismissed as she opened the club room door, motioning for Yuri to enter the room.
"B-But…"
"I said. Back. To. Work!" She growled through gritted teeth, still smiling widely, that only making Yuri more fearful of her.
"Y-Yes, President. As you say, President" Yuri obeyed.
"That's my good girl. Always doing as she's told. Come on now, the audience won't wait while you laze around!" Sayori stated as she held the door open, Yuri sighing as she returned to the club room, stepping inside and looking around, her eyes scanning the room from wall to wall, seeing all the students and even a few faculty members that had shown up for the performance, all of them either sitting down on the chairs, on the floor, standing up or leaning against the walls.
As for Yuri, she did what she always does in cramped places. Found a small, shadowy corner and stood there. Out of the way as she kept her hands behind her back, gripping her wrists tightly.
The room wasn't exactly packed, but a fair number had shown up. Significantly bigger than what was originally anticipated, hence the lack of chairs for everyone. Whether tonight's turnout was due to a large interest in poetry, or simply the result of tedious advertising, or even solely due to the cupcakes, Yuri would never really know.
It was most likely the cupcakes though.
"Testing. Testing. One, two, three! This thing's on, right?" Sayori asked as she stood on stage, tapping her finger gently on the microphone mounted to a stand in front of her, a loan from the audio/visual club, a sound system to be used for tonight's performance and returned Monday morning after. "It is on? Awesome! Okay so, yeah! Welcome all to the literature club! It's so good to see everybody!" She greeted to the crowd energetically, her face still beaming with that bright, unnaturally positive smile, albeit slightly toned down. To the others, Sayori looked normal, but to Yuri, Natsuki and Aaron, it was… worrying.
Speaking of Aaron, he was standing on the other side of the room, near the table where the cupcakes were, having finally passed them all out to everyone.
He looked so… distressed. So out of it. So uncomfortable. Like he was in some foreign country. It looked like he didn't even want to be in the room anymore. Like he was planning to just walk away and go home. Honestly, Yuri wanted to do the same thing. After all of this, home would really be the only place she felt like she could be comfortable in anymore, the company of her family notwithstanding. We'll… We'll cross that bridge when we get to it.
Picking up from where we left off…
Yuri chanced glances in Aaron's direction constantly, her eyes peering across the room to look at him, only to retreat down to the floor the moment she thought he'd look back. For a brief moment, their eyes almost made contact with each other, only for the both of them to look away awkwardly, Yuri's cheeks redder than fresh paint as she hid her face from Aaron over and over again in embarrassment, him no doubt doing the same.
She wondered if she should walk up and say something to him. Try to talk about this or just… Just stand next to him and be silent. Just be in his proximity. In his presence. At his side. She was about to do just that too, only for her cowardice and fear to get the better of her as she over thought and second guessed herself over and over.
As for Natsuki, she was by Aaron's side, sitting on the table with the empty cupcake trays, her head buried in her notebook as her eyes scanned its pages multiple times, most likely trying to memorize her poem.
"So to start us off, I wanna share my poem. One which I've spent much time over. I'm super excited to present it to you all and not only do I hope you love it, but I also hope it gives you the courage to come on up and recite a poem yourself! Here we go!" Sayori shouted into the microphone as she flipped open her notebook, turning to the appropriate page as she sat on the bar stool, beginning to recite her poem.
"This one's called My Meadow!" She announced, giggling slightly at the end. "Sorry about that. I giggled a little… Anyways"
My Meadow.
A poem by Sayori
–
Rainy days and cloudy skies all around? Not a single glimmer of sunshine to be found?
Well, don't you worry your pretty, little head! Let's change the scenery! Go somewhere fun and new instead!
Let's go to my meadow!
Come with me and you'll soon see, my meadow's the place to be!
Filled with singing birds and buzzing bees, grass that's all the way up to our knees!
Tall, healthy trees as far as the eye can see, the perfect place to come spend some time with me!
It's a place of peace, comfort and safety. A place where you can be yourself.
Relax and unwind. A place to just lay down and free your mind.
Open it up to the wonderful sights and sounds. The wonders and adventures waiting to be found.
Let's rest in the shade and watch the sun set. Don't worry, the rain clouds don't come here, so you won't get wet.
For a large dome encapsulates my meadow, keeping out the horrors of the world. The glass is bully proof, as you can see. Don't worry. They won't hurt you when you're with me.
For I am your protector. Your savior. Your guardian angel.
I pick you up when they make you fall. I help you walk when they force you to crawl.
No one can hurt you here, no matter how hard they try. There's no one here to get you angry, make you yell, scream or cry.
Spending our days in the meadow, you finally begin to see. My meadow is the place where you've always wanted to be.
My meadow is your home now. You know this to be true.
It's a safe space. A happy place.
For me…
…And for you.
Yuri sighed as she listened to Sayori's poem, hearing her recite it almost similarly to the way one would read a bedtime story to a child, her words filled with varying degrees of tone and pitch, changing whenever appropriate.
The poem itself wasn't bad at all. Too many rhymes and too simple of wording for Yuri's taste, but she could appreciate the message within it.
Right now, she found the idea of retreating to a safe space, fleeing to a personal sanctuary to be very, very attractive. Shame that Yuri doesn't really have one of those… Well, she did, but it didn't feel very safe anymore.
As for the crowd, they seemed to genuinely enjoy it, giving a moderate applause, smiles on their faces as Sayori stood up and took a bow.
"Thank you. Thank you. You're all too kind!" She said to the crowd as she enjoyed the praise for her work, Yuri looking in the corner of her eye to see Aaron and Natsuki side by side in their place in the far corner of the room, clapping as well, seeming to have enjoyed it themselves. As for Yuri… She didn't clap. Didn't want to.
It wasn't out of disrespect or anything. More out of fear, actually. Right now, she just wanted to blend into the background. Become a wallflower. Be seen and not heard. Preferred to be forgotten.
"Okay. Okay. Now, does anyone else wanna come up and read a poem of their own? Anyone? Anyone at all?" Sayori asked as she scanned the room, the crowd immediately going silent. "Oh… That's alright! No pressure. We'll just move on to our next member" She stated as she exited the stage. "Natsuki! You're up!" She called, her hand beckoning, a nervous look coming to Natsuki's face as she clutched her poem tightly, Yuri seeing her twitch and shiver a little.
"Hey. You got this" Aaron said in a reassuring tone, his hand patting her gently on the back like she did for him. "Remember, you're a pro" He said encouragingly.
"R-Right. I'm a pro. I'm a pro" She repeated, trying to reaffirm her confidence in her skills, her shaking seeming to ease, if only slightly. "I'm… I'm gonna give a performance so good, everyone in this room is gonna die of amazement!" She boasted to herself.
"I believe in you. You're gonna do great!" Aaron continued to reassure her, Natsuki nervously chuckling at that.
"O-Of course I am! I-I'm a pro, remember?" She stated as fact, breathing deeply, her look of nervousness immediately being replaced with a glare of manufactured confidence. A brave front, but a front nonetheless.
Manufactured or not, Natsuki still bravely marched onto the stage, readjusting the microphone stand to her height before uncrumbling and straightening her poem, clearing her throat as she prepared herself for the presentation, the audience waiting with baited breath for her performance.
She breathed deeply again, Sayori sitting in one of the available chairs in the front row, directly in front of Natsuki as she gave an encouraging thumbs up.
"S-So… Hi there. This is, um… This is my poem. I hope you all like it, even though I don't really care if you don't! But… Some kind words would be appreciated. But again, I don't need or really want your approval!" She said to the audience.
"Natsuki, poem please" Sayori urged her to just present already.
"Yeah. Yeah. Keep your pants on! I was getting to that…" She huffed.
Jump!
A poem by Natsuki
–
I see your worries and inhibitions.
I understand your greatest fears.
You're too scared to live life the way you want.
You fear their words will bring you to tears.
All your life, you're told what to do and where to go. Pushed and pulled by everyone else too and fro.
You're like a trained dog to them, letting them grasp your leash with such control.
"Do as I say, animal! Sit! Stand! Roll!"
You submit and obey because of fear. The shame they'd bring upon you. The words they'd shout that you don't want to hear.
The you inside. The real you. They hate it with a passion. And so, they must hold you down and change who you are constantly, like a girl addicted to fashion.
"Screw those guys!" I say to you out loud. "Be who you want to be! Stand tall! Stand firm and be proud!"
You look at me with confusion and even a little anger in your eyes, as if I preach blasphemy.
You couldn't be further from the truth though, as I am here to grant you amnesty.
Unlike them, I won't use your fears to bring you pain. Instead, I encourage you to face them head on and show you all the power you could gain!
You just have to jump!
Jump out of the darkness and into the light, let the real you come out and shine bright!
Jump away from those people and come be with me! Together, we'll build you to be better, faster, stronger. You'll see.
I know it's not as easy as it sounds, but it's time for you to be firm and stand your ground!
You're done letting them push you around!
So please, don't be scared. I'll help you be free.
Jump.
Take my hand.
Please, come with me.
Yuri smiled weakly as she heard Natsuki recite her poem, genuinely liking the overall theme of it as she clapped lightly, only to be overshadowed by the applause of the others in the audience. It was much more acclaimed than Sayori's poem, garnering a much bigger applause, primarily from the females in the audience, as they seemed to enjoy it and the overall message much more than than the males.
Yuri herself didn't have much to complain about with Natsuki's poem. A strong message that while yes, was a little forced and often preached to death by others, was still rather powerful. She even went a step above and used much more sophisticated wording than what was usually expected of her, Making her poem not only feel passionate but much more mature when compared to her other works. All and all, Yuri was rather impressed by it.
She sighed a little bit, her smile disappearing as that word lingered in her mind. Impressed.
Was… Was what Sayori said true? Did Natsuki really try to impress Yuri, only for her to turn her cheek? Tilt her nose up like spoiled, arrogant royalty and ignore it? Disregard Natsuki as nothing more than an attention craving child?
It certainly felt like that to Yuri, Making her feel an unbearable ache in the pit of her gut as the guilt crept up on her, causing her to look away from the stage in shame, her eyes focusing on the ground instead.
She could hear Natsuki practically reveling in the praise from the audience, her actions akin to that of the winner of a beauty pageant, basking in the glory and praise from her onlookers, it being more than enough to inflate Natsuki's already massive ego.
Yuri scoffed at herself after that thought echoed in her mind, the pangs of guilt striking hard soon after. There she goes, putting the poor girl down.
In all seriousness, it wasn't that bad. Natsuki worked hard on her poem and deserved to indulge herself in the attention. It's just that… She has a tenancy to let it all go to her head. One of the last things Yuri would want would be for Natsuki to start hailing herself as the queen of poetry over a few cheers from total strangers.
Regardless, after Natsuki had her few minutes of attention, she was politely asked off the stage by Sayori, Aaron now readying himself to step up and present his poem, Yuri's ears perking up slightly at the idea of hearing his words.
"Beat that, scrub!" She heard Natsuki giggle playfully, bumping her elbow into Aaron. All in good fun, of course.
"I'll try my best" Aaron replied with a smile, unusually confident as he stepped up, the microphone adjusted to his height as he prepared his poem, his eyes looking out to the crowd in front of him before he breathed deeply as he prepared to read.
He just jumped right into it. Didn't bother to give an introduction like the others. Whether because he didn't have anything worth while to say or because he wanted the words themselves to speak to the audience, Yuri didn't know. She expected the latter though.
Dreams.
A poem by Aaron.
–
There was once a time where I was overjoyed by the thought of sleep.
My mind shutting down, turning off as I fall, drift away deep.
Disconnecting from the world and entering one of my own. A place where I'm safe, happy, at peace and alone.
The wonders I'd dream about, deep under in this state.
The visions I'd have. The art my mind would create.
Be it alternate realities, alien worlds or simply being with my friends.
My dreams were intricate stories with unique plots, starts and ends.
But now… Now not so much.
My gift of dreams has been… Corrupted. Tainted. Cursed.
As I awaken in fear every night, my brain feeling as if it will burst.
I used to dream of happy things. The stuff that would bring a smile to your face.
But now my dreams are night terrors, haunting what was once a beloved place.
They are dreams no more. Now demented visions.
Blood. Gore. Death. Suffering the likes my mind could never envision.
A rope round the throat. The deafening crack of a snapped neck. A knife forced deeply into the chest.
I awaken, kicking and screaming, sweat covered as the day dawns, pulling me from my rest.
Random nightmares? Or a secret message? A foreshadowing of events? A signal to warn me of something I can prevent?
I may never know, for it is beyond my comprehension.
These little haunting visions filling me with such apprehension.
I fear to speak them in my waking life, lest they may come true.
The thought of such horrors upon us all… I don't know what I'd do.
For now, I persevere, no matter how grizzly the scene may be.
As I can find small comfort in the fact that such terrors are never truly upon me.
They are just dreams, after all. Harmless products of the mind.
I'm just glad my waking life is much, much more kind.
Peaceful. Quiet. With friends all around. As long as I stay awake, I'm safe and sound.
"Oh wow! That was great! Woo! Go, Aaron! That's my boy!" Sayori clapped from within the audience loudly, everyone else silent as they all looked at her with faces of confusion towards her overexcited behavior, Aaron blushing a little in embarrassment at the fact that only she applauded. "Why are you all looking at me? Clap!" Sayori shouted to the crowd, them immediately obeying, clapping loudly and cheering at Aaron.
It was genuine cheering of course, many people enjoying Aaron's poem, even if it was slightly more extreme than what everyone else had wrote.
Yuri loved it though. Loved every second of it, clapping just as loudly as everyone else, a wide smile on her face. Even Natsuki, who herself was very difficult to impress was clapping along, though with less enthusiasm.
"So… did I beat you?" Aaron asked her as he walked off the stage.
"Well, I wouldn't say you beat me. Not by a long shot! But… you did come a little close. Somewhat decent. Good enough, I guess" Natsuki smiled teasingly, Aaron chuckling at that. 'You're still nowhere near my league though! So don't get cocky!" She added, laughing along with him.
"Wow! That was really something, wasn't it? Just goes to show you that poetry can be about… anything really!" Sayori said as she stood back on stage, microphone in hand. "Alright, so now does anyone have any poems they'd like to share? Come on! Don't be shy! This is a judgment free zone!" She encouraged, the audience remaining silent as the faint chirp of crickets outside could be heard from the opened window. "Seriously?" Sayori asked, her smile finally fading away, replaced with a frown, disappointed that even after her club members showed and shared their work with everyone, nobody even thought of joining in. "Alright then… Our final performance for the night is from our vice president, Yuri" She announced, pointing to the little corner the girl had hid herself in this whole time.
As Sayori pointed to the corner, almost everyone's eyes locked on to Yuri, the many faces staring at her, causing her to quiver a little in discomfort.
"Well, come on. Get it over with so we can go home" Sayori demanded, her hand beckoning Yuri forward, only to have her command disobeyed as Yuri stood still, paralyzed. "I said… Go!" She grunted as she walked over to Yuri, grabbing her by the wrist and practically forcing her on stage, Yuri looking down at the audience with fear in her eyes, too terrified to even speak.
Her eyes were jittering like crazy, going from one corner of the room to the next, seeing all the faces staring back at her, waiting eagerly to begin, the pressure to put on a decent performance eating away at her confidence as she felt her knees weaken. Felt the beat of her heart quicken nervously as it pumped her blood at a dangerously fast rate.
As her eyes quickly scanned the many faces in the crowd, it lingered on Aaron's, Yuri seeing that he'd moved to the front of the audience, making gestures and motions with his hands, pointing at his eyes and then to Yuri repeatedly.
"Look at me" He tried to convey. His eyes glaring at Yuri, not in anger but in determination. In confidence. Like a king delivering a grand speech to his subjects. "Focus on me. There is only me"
"Only him…" Yuri said in her mind, locking her eyes on Aaron's as she breathed deeply, trying to drown out everyone else as she presented her poem.
"I… uh" She choked a little on her words. "I worked very h-hard on this. Stood up much later than I should have to finish it. I hope… I hope you enjoy it" She said to him as she prepared to read.
Afterimage Of A Crimson Eye
A poem by Yuri
–
The red glow of it pierces through the darkness like bullets piercing through skin, a slight illumination of the pitch black I am surrounded in. Trapped with no exit or path of freedom in sight. Bound captive by the glowing light.
I am held by no chains or shackles. No handcuffs or bindings.
For it is my mind that is keeping me stationary, forcing me to stare, transfixed at the unknown.
The red light with its soft, humming glow.
It pulses and beats, like a heart pumping blood. The light dimming and brightening as the pace quickens, turning into a blinding strobe.
And yet, like the simple minded creature I am. The dumb animal pretending to possess intelligence, I stare, transfixed. Fascinated. Mesmerized. Hypnotized. Captivated.
The light's hypnotic strobe calms. Slows as it gently bounces. Rises and falls, seemingly knowing what it has done to me.
"Kneel" I hear deep within my mind, a voice not like my own. Foreign. Alien. Unknown.
I obey mindlessly, unknowingly so as the eye hovers closer, still brightly aglow.
The eye is in possession of a figure, shrouded in darkness. Owner of the voice that so rudely invaded my mind.
The glow illuminates the figure's body as it looks down on my kneeling form. A woman. Petite. Small. Hair snow white. The glowing eye attached to her forehead.
Three.
It pulses brighter and brighter, my eyes looking away as I scream in pain, like a fire has been ignited in my brain.
My mind is under attack! Being flooded with words I cannot comprehend. A voice shouting from within. Forceful. Dominant. Sadistic. Cruel.
This woman relishes in my suffering. The pain she inflicts on me, looking down and grinning with glee.
She commands respect. Obedience and servitude. Undying loyalty. Fealty.
I try to fight. Resist. Disavow! But my struggle is in vain.
She forces her hands to my jaw, gripping deathly tight, forcing me to stare, take in the blinding light.
The pulsing eye speaks to me… explains the wonders of the world without saying a word. Tells secrets of forbidden knowledge better off unheard.
It promises more if I follow and serve. Promises more if I obey and be given the life it says I deserve.
One a service. One of obedience. One of captivity, my mind being my cage.
The thought disgusts me as I try to escape, only for the eye to calm my rage.
It relaxes, pacifies and seduces, forcing me to bend to its will, the woman smiling, her mission complete as I am released, falling to the ground in exhaustion.
She stays by my side for a small time, gently stroking the skin of my forehead.
"You'll be perfect" She said. "So much potential in store. Once you are made like me, you will see life as so much more" She then pulls out a scalpel from her pocket and hands it to me. Dirty. Rusted. Unsanitary.
"Open your third eye" She commands her new slave, my body mindlessly complying, regardless of my thoughts as I feel the scalpel cut my skin. As the wound is made, I feel it from within.
My third eye opens… And my new life begins.
There was a moment of silence after Yuri finished reciting her poem, practically choking on the thick, stagnant air as she breathed nervously, the crowd in front of her just staring straight, looks of confusion on their faces, almost as if they needed a moment to even comprehend what they'd heard.
Yuri didn't see this however, as her eyes had remained locked onto Aaron the entire time, doing as he told her to.
It felt much better. Focusing only on him and not everyone else. Ignoring the glaring, scolding eyes of strangers and seeking out his instead. Presenting her poem, her words, her thoughts to him, the strangers in the room merely onlookers and nothing more.
Thinking at it from that mentality, it made the presentation much more easier for her. It made her feel even better as Aaron began clapping slowly, a smile on his face as a few of the other audience members clapped as well. Not a roaring applause like the others though. Small, quiet claps. Some even vocalized their satisfaction with simple words.
Words along the lines of "Oh, I get it" Or "Yeah, I kinda liked that"
Compared to everyone else though, Yuri didn't receive much praise. Not as much as Sayori or Aaron and definitely nowhere near how much Natsuki received.
Still though, Yuri's literature was praised none the less. Even if only a small minority actually enjoyed her work, she was content with knowing that if anything, at least a few people enjoyed it. That being more than enough for her.
She took a small bow before stepping off the stage, her performance being the last for the night, the event now over as everyone stood up and exited the club room in a neat, orderly line, leaving the members of the literature club alone, almost ready to leave themselves and return home.
"Super amazing job, everyone! I'm so proud of you all!" Sayori praised loudly, shutting the door before making her way to the closet, pulling out two brooms along with a spray bottle of cleaning solution and a few rags. "Okay, team! Let's clean this mess up, put all the desks back and head home!"
"Wait a minute… Where's Natsuki?" Yuri asked as she looked around, not seeing her fellow club member anywhere within the room.
"Oh, you didn't know? She left early" Sayori stated. "She had a reason. A really good one too, but I can't remember what it was. I wasn't really paying attention. She left almost before you were about to go on though"
"She… She didn't even see my performance?" Yuri asked, a small frown on her face.
"No. Shame too. I would have loved to hear her thoughts on it. Especially after your little exchange with her outside!"
"Exchange?" Aaron asked as he looked at Yuri, her head sinking slightly into her turtleneck.
"Oh well. No real harm done anyway. You can just show her your poem on Monday. Than you and her can go back to being friends again!" Sayori stated, giggling a little as she smiled brightly at Yuri.
"She… She didn't even see my performance…" Yuri repeated as she looked down at the ground, saddened that Natsuki would just leave unannounced, not even bothering to wait for Yuri to present her poem, her thinking that to be the prime reason for Natsuki taking her leave.
Was she really so disgusted and angered by Yuri? To the point where she didn't want to even hear her voice? Didn't want to hear the words she poured hours upon hours of thought and work into? Even after Yuri had listened to hers?
Did she really despise her that much now? So much so that she'd abandon her friend when she needed her most? Or was this payback? Revenge for all the times Yuri had unknowingly done the same to her?
"Yes! As you said before! Just packed up her things and walked right on out! Didn't even bother to say goodbye either" Sayori said cheerfully as Yuri's head sunk lower and lower by the second, her frown growing more prominent. "Oh no! Do I see a little rain cloud hovering over my vice president?" Sayori asked in concern… or at least it sounded like that.
"Huh? N-No… I… I'm fine" Yuri said as she picked her head back up, sighing deeply before shaking her thoughts out of mind, trying to just forget about them. Drown them out. Ignore them "I just… Let's just get the club room cleaned so we can all go home"
"That's the spirit! Don't worry about the mess too much, guys. With the fou… I mean, three of us, this'll take no time at all!" Sayori said, smiling as she gave a broom to Yuri. "Aaron, you go get the desks from outside. Yuri, you start sweeping while I put away all these chairs!"
"Jesus Christ, It's freezing tonight!" Natsuki said, shivering slightly as she walked up to her house, making her way to the door and pulling out her house keys, unlocking the front door.
She hesitated a little before touching the knob though, a slight shiver of fear running down her spine as she thought of what would happen once inside. She then quickly pulled her hand away, digging into her pocket to pull out her phone.
"Oh shit!" She cursed silently as she saw the time. Eleven fifty five. Fifty five minutes past her curfew.
Her lips quivered slightly as she stood there on her porch, not exactly sure if entering the house would be the safest thing for her.
O-Okay. Don't panic. Everything will be fine. All she has to do is just calmly explain what happened. She just lost track of time. It just happens.
All she had to do was just explain. He… He'd understand, of course. He was a lot of things, but he was far from unreasonable. And even then, there was always the chance that he'd be asleep. Passed out on the couch or in his bed. And if she stays in her room for the rest of the weekend, out of sight and out of mind, it'll never be brought up!
Okay… She can do this.
She breathed deeply before firmly gripping her doorknob, turning it slowly as she opened the front door to a crack, her head peeking in. Lights out. Pitch black. The television wasn't even on. Good sign. Very good sign.
Her breathing grew shallow as she slowly entered her home, her shoes gently making contact with the wooden floor, ensuring that as little noise as possible could be made as she slowly snuck through her entrance way, walking on the tips of her toes, thinking that she just might be able to actually sneak in successfully for once, being in the clear once she makes it to the top of the stairs, slowly approaching the first step.
"And where have you been, huh?" She gasped in shock as the light came on, her eyes taking a moment to adjust as she saw a large man standing in the hallway, his arms crossed as he glared hard at Natsuki, seeing her quiver and squirm slightly in his presence.
"Um… N-Nowhere" She said meekly.
"Nowhere?"
"No! I-I mean… I was at the festival! Just like I said I would be! I was nowhere else. Honest!"
"Quiet!" Her father shouted at her, demanding silence from his daughter, her having no choice but to obey her parent, keeping her mouth shut as her father approached his daughter, the sound of his shoes clumping and clacking against the wooden floor causing her to sweat nervously as she looked at the floor, too fearful to meet his eyes.
"I told you to be home before eleven" He said simply, repeating the order he'd given before Natsuki had left. "What time is it?"
"Eleve…"
"Speak up!"
"Eleven fifty five!"
"Eleven fifty five…" Her father repeated, shaking his head in disapproval. "So, what's your excuse this time? Let me guess, you just lost track of time! Oh, it's okay! It just happens! You're only human!" He said tauntingly, his glare not leaving his face. "You were going to use that excuse on me, weren't you?"
"N-No…" Natsuki said, denying his assumption. "I was… I was working really hard for my club's event. The-The president! She's… I know she doesn't look like it, but she's a real taskmaster! Made me set up the entire event on my own!"
"Oh, is that so?" Her father asked. "You poor thing. Perhaps I should have a talk with this little club president?"
"No!" Natsuki shouted loudly, flinching a little as she saw her father's glare sharpen. "I mean… It wasn't really that bad. I may have been exaggerating just a little. And um… My friends helped me with the event so…"
"So you were lying to me" He called her bluff.
"What?! N-No! I wasn't!"
"You little bitch!" He cursed angrily, his teeth gritting hard. "All I asked for was a simple answer to a simple question! Where were you, Natsuki? My darling daughter? My little baby girl? Where were you all that time? Where were you while your poor father stood here, alone in the house, worried about you? And what do you give me? What's your explanation? A fucking lie! A made up, fucking fabrication!" he shouted loudly as he clenched his fist, raising it in the air as Natsuki screamed loudly, falling onto the floor and curling into a ball, her arms covering her face.
"Please don't hurt me. Please don't hurt me. Please don't hurt me" She mouthed silently, her father sighing as he lowered his hand.
"The truth… Please" He asked politely.
"I wasn't lying. I really was at the festival and I was working! I just… I wanted to spend some time with my friends too. I was just…"
"So you were running around, playing games?"
"Y-Yes…" Natsuki admitted. "I… I really am sorry for lying. I didn't mean to. It just happ-"
"Shut up!" Her father shouted, his hand making contact with his forehead, rubbing it gently as he sighed in disappointment. "To bed! Now!"
"Y-Yes! Yes sir!" Natsuki said as she quickly picked herself up, walking upstairs and into her room.
"Lying little bitch…" She heard her father curse as he remained downstairs.
Natsuki sighed in relief as she entered her bedroom, locking the door behind her as she sank against it, relieved to have gone unscathed from her father's confrontation. She then stood to her feet and removed her backpack, throwing it onto the bed as she took off her clothes, changing into a set of light pink pajamas with white dots.
After changing into her sleeping clothes, she picked her backpack back up, unzipping it and pulling out the various stuffed animals that were gifted to her tonight, all of them being the products of hard work by Aaron in an attempt to fulfill his promise.
He didn't, by the way. Natsuki wanted twenty. She got eight. Nowhere near enough.
She chuckled a little at that as she cleared a space on the shelf mounted above her twin sized bed, standing on it as she carefully placed the stuffed animals on the shelf, giving names to the small toys before setting them on the shelf.
The giant panda. The one that Yuri had won for Natsuki. That wasn't going on the shelf though. No. That big boy was sharing the bed with Natsuki tonight! She'd find a proper place for him tomorrow though. Maybe mount a new shelf over her bed just for him.
She sighed as she looked down at it, a small frown on her face as thoughts of Yuri entered her mind.
Looking back… Maybe Natsuki went too far. Said things that shouldn't have been said and was too quick to take Sayori's side.
Honestly, looking back on her words and seeing the large prize Yuri had worked hard to earn for her, Natsuki shouldn't have said what she said. But… Just because she shouldn't have said it doesn't mean it wasn't true.
Though she knew Yuri didn't intentionally mean it, Natsuki did feel hated by her. Felt disregard and treated like an attention craving, over emotional child. Brushed aside and ignored whenever she was cranky or just in one of her moods. Cast out from the rest of the group until she'd calmed herself.
She knew the other club members did it to her too, but Yuri was the worst when it came to this. And whenever the two sat together in a room or even shared air for more than a second, for everything Natsuki did, Yuri was ready and willing to scold, pointing out and getting agitated over the littlest of things.
So what if Natsuki sits at her desk with her legs lazily crossed? So what if she curses once and awhile? So what if she's a bit of a messy eater? So what if she likes junk food? So what if she's a little crass and impolite? So what if her writing style is cute? So what if she prefers simpler words? So what if she thinks tiny sentences work better instead of massive paragraphs? So what if she likes manga and thinks novels are boring?
She grunted a little in frustration before shaking those thoughts out of her head. Whatever. It was just a stupid fight. All Natsuki would have to do was wait it out for a few days. Keep her distance and stay out of Yuri's way. She'd forget all about it and move on eventually. For Natsuki, it wasn't worth fighting over.
She yawned slightly as she turned off the light in her room, climbing into bed with her new panda bear at her side as she laid her head on the pillow, covering both herself and her new friend in the blanket.
"Nighty night…" She said to it in a tired yawn before falling asleep.