I do not own Twilight
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EIGHTEEN
Three days passed and Leah still hadn't seen or spoken to Jacob. It was Friday and she was really missing him. At first, after she got over the shock of getting hurt with the glass, she was angry and wanted to punish him for what he'd done by staying away. But now that it was the weekend, their time to be together, she wasn't sure who the one on punishment was. Her anger was dissolving and all she wanted was to go back to things the way they were before Bella called.
Knowing she'd be in for the weekend, Leah stopped for groceries on the way home. When she pulled up to the house, she was surprised to see Jacob there, waiting in his truck. He hadn't used the key and gone inside.
"What are you doing here?" she asked firmly, but inside she was giddy with want for him. But when Leah took a good look at him, she realized that Jacob was a mess. "Jacob, what happened?"
He swallowed and looked down at his feet. "I know I hurt you, and I wish I could take it back Leah. I hate myself for what I did. I know it's probably over between us but I just need you so bad tonight and I couldn't wait for you to call...Nessie's gone to Bella's. She went with them for the weekend. She was happy to go and I just, I feel like I've lost everything and I don't know what to do. I feel like I can't breathe." He's was shaking, in the midst of another panic attack.
Without a care for anything but him, Leah rushed to Jacob and pulled him into her arms. Jacob automatically pulled her so tight against his body that she could barely breathe, but she let him hold on as his body vibrated under the stress. "Shh, it's alright Jake. It's okay. I promise, it'll get easier. She's still your little girl, Nessie won't forget you. She'll be back in a few days." She soothingly stroked his back as he broke.
Leah didn't know how long they stood there in the driveway, but Jacob finally got a hold of himself and pulled away. He looked down at her, and his hand reached up and traced the small white strips over the dissolvable stitches on Leah's cheek. "I can't believe I did this to you. I'm a monster."
Leah held his hand against her bruised skin and sighed. "I know you didn't mean it, you're not a monster Jake. But you scared me when you lost control. I don't want to ever see you like that again," she confessed, her mind quickly replaying the crazed way Jacob had behaved that day.
Jacob sighed and shook his head in shame. "I'm so sorry, I promise I'll do better. Please forgive me Leah, please take me back. I don't want to lose you too. You're the only person in my life who makes this bearable. I love you so much."
Leah froze but Jacob's fingers kept working against her skin, gently rubbing the flesh and providing her with that familiar warmth she'd missed, craved.
"I'm in love with you Leah," he said again.
Leah didn't know what to say. She wanted to tell him what was in her heart but she felt tongue-tied. Jacob seemed to understand, and didn't force the issue by asking what she felt. Instead, he leaned closer and Leah allowed his lips to capture hers. The heat flared between them instantly, and Leah had to force him away.
"Let's stop giving the neighbors something to talk about Jake. Help me with these bags and I'll get dinner started."
Jacob seemed to understand that it was an invitation to stay, and eagerly grabbed the groceries while she unlocked the house. At some point she'd tell him that they were never broken up. She'd been upset but Leah knew she couldn't let Jacob Black go over one mistake. He was a good man, and if she could have given Sam countless chances over the years, certainly Jake could get a second one. He loved her, and she knew that his words were true because he'd shown her that he did many times. As hurt as she was over his loss of control, she knew she couldn't hold it against him forever. Seeing him made it clear that she could only forgive him and trust that he would keep his word.
After dinner Leah drew them a bath and they laid together in the hot water and discussed everything that happened with Nessie and her mother. Leah hoped that Bella would keep her side of the bargain and share the child with Jacob. But who knew what would happen in the future? Her greatest fear was that Nessie would abandon Jacob altogether, although it was unlikely given the close bond between father and daughter. But children could be easily influenced, and Leah didn't trust Bella at all. Once again she encouraged Jacob to get a good lawyer specializing in custody, promising to call Alice Cullen for a referral on Monday morning.
After rinsing off in the shower, Leah invited Jacob into her bed. But instead of making love, Jacob simply spooned her and they fell asleep, content to finally be back in each other's arms.
At some point in the night Leah woke to the feeling of Jacob's erection pressing into her backside, and his hands travelling the length of her body and settling on her breasts. She allowed him to take her from behind and he moved slow and patiently inside her, driving her crazy until she begged him for more – harder, faster, deeper. She rolled on top of him and took control, allowing their eyes to connect as she rode him to the end. The devotion she saw in his eyes, the admiration, the pure need and want, it filled her up inside.
I am yours, his gaze seemed to say.
She was overwhelmed. The feeling of how perfectly they fit together was most potent when they were like this, so emotionally and physically exposed and submissive to each other. Leah was overcome with these emotions as she came, as she submitted to the pleasure that only Jacob could give. She was his too, wasn't she? Even after Sam had broken her heart she'd somehow managed to give her soul to Jacob Black. She finally understood that the bond between them was deeper than anything she could ever have imagined and it was freeing. This was right, this was it, for life. "I love you," she announced, as her body convulsed again. "Black, I love you."
Jacob's eyes widened at her outburst and without warning he rolled her onto the bed so that he was on top again, hoisting her leg around him as he moved slowly inside of her once more. His lips suckled her neck, sending shivers all through Leah's body. Combined with her orgasm it was an incredible feeling. He gently bit down on her shoulder blade and teased the skin before tracing a path up her neck, beneath her chin and finally her lips.
"I know honey," he finally replied, his eyes locking onto hers. "I love you too and I intend to show you how much for the rest of my life."
Leah pulled his lips to hers, tasting the sweetness of the promise in his words.
…..
Leah woke up again to the smell of breakfast. Jacob was sitting on the bed with a tray of pancakes, bacon, orange juice, and a smile.
"What's all this?" Leah asked, grinning from ear to ear. It had been years since Sam had done this for her. He'd probably only done it once or twice in the early days.
"Just wanted to do something special for you, Doc. I don't know how to really say I'm sorry. Nothing feels quite enough."
"Oh Jacob." Leah's heart melted as she reached for him. "Stop beating up yourself, I forgive you and I'm sorry too, for not letting us talk it through. My face will heal and all will be well again."
"Thought I'd lost you," her lover continued to pout even after her reassurances.
Leah reached out and cupped his face, "I'm yours, remember?"
Jacob smiled and kissed her on the mouth. "Eat up baby. I'll go get mine."
They spent the morning in bed, cuddling and talking. Leah knew he was worried about Nessie but she assured him that she was fine. "How about we go to the market?" she asked.
Jacob's browed furrowed. "I'm not sure I could do it without her."
"Isn't Billy there with Julie? We could stop by. You need some normalcy Jake."
"I guess…"
He had a few items of clothing at her house, just as Nessie had in her room, so they showered and changed and made their way before the market closed for the week. For the first time without Nessie they walked together as a full couple, Leah's arm around Jacob's waist and his thumb in her front pocket. It felt good and she knew that Jacob was feeling good about it too. After their declarations of love the world just seemed brighter in her eyes.
They stopped and saw Billy, who welcomed Leah with open arms, then went to look at plants. Leah wanted a few indoor pots for the office, and on a whim thought it would be nice to set up a painting station for Nessie at her house. When Leah was younger she'd loved all types of art. She still dabbled in watercolors every now and again. They had just finished buying the painting accessories when a little voice screaming for "Daddy!" suddenly rang out.
Jacob instantly turned and Leah watched as he sprinted toward his daughter and scooped her up in his arms, showering her with kisses. "What are you doing here Squirt?!" Jacob asked in surprise.
"Mommy and Edward brought me!"
Sure enough, Leah saw the immaculately dressed couple standing a few feet away with disgruntled looks on their faces. Bella's gaze suddenly shifted to Leah's, and she watched the pale, pretty woman redden.
"Leah!" Nessie called out, breaking Leah's observations. Her little hands reached out and Leah dropped her shopping to the floor in time to catch Nessie as she jumped into her arms.
"Hey Ness! How are you?"
"I'm good! My Mommy's back! And she got Edward!"
Leah couldn't help but laugh. "You like him?" she whispered, after giving the girl a kiss.
"Yeah, he's okay. He said I can have a puppy if I don't cry to go home anymore."
Leah stiffened, knowing that Jacob had heard. "Jacob!" She called in warning. But he didn't listen, he just turned and stormed off to confront the poor man.
"Nessie, are you not having a good time at your other home?" Leah asked, walking a little ways back so that Nessie wouldn't witness the argument that had erupted between her two fathers and mother. Leah wanted to grab Jacob by the ear and lead him away for making a scene but decided to focus on Nessie instead. She would deal with him in a minute.
"It's okay I guess, but I wanted Daddy to tuck me in and Mommy said no. But I don't want Edward to do it."
"Ness remember, when you're with Mommy, Daddy won't be able to do all the things he usually does. So you've got to let Mom and Edward help a little okay? It will make everyone happy alright?"
"Are they fighting because of me?"
"They all love you very much, and it's hard learning how to share."
"Sharing is hard."
"Yes it is sweetie. I bet you know that from school huh?"
"Yeah! Tommy Jenks doesn't like to share! That's why I don't give him any cookies."
"I bet. But sharing is good, because it means that everyone gets a little happiness okay? So when you're with Mommy remember to let Edward share you a little bit okay? He wants to get to know you better so you can be friends just like you and me. Okay?"
"Alright Leah."
"That's my good girl. Papa will be proud of you." Nessie seemed to like that idea and smiled. "Oh guess what? I bought you a surprise! When you come over you can see it in your room okay?"
"Really? Thanks Leah!"
"You're welcome Nessie."
Leah held the child's hand and took a deep breath. The childish adults were still arguing but they were causing a scene in the dwindling crowd. Leah decided to let Nessie go with Billy and ran back to where Jacob was pointing his finger in Edward's face.
"Hey! Jacob!" She said, then whistled loudly to capture his attention. "Aren't you going to introduce me?"
Jacob stared at her for a moment in shock and confusion before a flicker of remorse showed itself. He took a step back along with a deep breath, dragging his hand roughly over his face. "Where's Ness?" he questioned, his voice a hoarse whisper.
Leah took his hand and rubbed it, silently urging him to calm down. "With Billy. She didn't need to see this, right?"
"No she didn't!" Bella interrupted with a snappy attitude. "I'm Bella Masen by the way."
Leah turned to the woman, trying not to show her annoyance, and nodded once. "Leah Clearwater."
"This is Edward, my husband," Bella gestured to her husband and Leah turned to the tall man who seemed rather uncomfortable.
"Yes, hello. I see where she gets her hair and eyes."
The man suddenly smiled proudly while Jacob threw her a look that marked her as a betrayer. "Relax Jacob. I'm just trying to be friendly. We all remember what that is right? Friendly? For Nessie's sake?"
"Excuse me?" Bella shrieked with indignation.
"Don't give me that!" Leah snapped. "You're causing a scene in her favorite place, right in front of her! You should all be ashamed!"
"Jacob started it!" Bella argued.
"Because he found out that his daughter cried to come home!" Leah snapped, giving Jacob no room to cut in.
"Well he knew it would happen," Edward interjected. "It will take time. We can't always run to him every time she's upset! Renesmee will adjust in time he just needs to relax and see that we won't hurt her."
"Renesmee?" Leah asked, confused.
"It's Nessie's name, it's awful." Jacob grumbled.
"What does it mean?" Leah asked, perplexed that Bella could pick such a thing.
"It's a combination of Edward's and my mother's names – Renee and Esme."
"Oh." Leah understood now. How deep the deception ran!
"Yeah, another lie she told me when Nessie was born. Said it was 'exotic.'"
"Don't start Jacob!" Bella snapped.
"Look!" Leah raised her palms up before they could start again. "I talked to Nessie and I asked her to allow you all to share her. I asked her to let Edward share some of the things that she's accustomed to Jacob doing. So please, just try to be patient, all of you." She shot Jacob a look. "She doesn't understand how this works yet but you're not helping if all you do is fight!"
Edward regarded her for a moment before nodding once. "Thank you Miss Clearwater. It means a lot to me. I don't want to replace Jacob, despite what he thinks. I just want my chance to be her father. She is mine too and I just wish he'd understand that it's my right to love her."
"How can I when you're moving her so far away Edward? How will I still be her father?" Jacob groused.
"I have to go for business on behalf of my father, it can't be avoided. I promise you you'll get to see her Jacob, I'm not as heartless as you think."
"Well, we'll hold you to your word," Leah responded matter-of-factly.
"So I take it you and Jacob are together, since you've pushed yourself into our business?"
Leah rolled her eyes at the woman. Was Bella for real? "Yes, we are. Nessie has a room at my house." Leah added that last part just for spite.
Bella reddened, turning to her ex-husband. "What? You never told me about his Jacob!"
Leah pulled his arm before he could respond rudely. "Relax, she's hardly stayed over. I just have a lot of extra space and she claimed a room for herself. Nessie and I get along just fine. I've been teaching her to bake so she can do it with you."
"Yes, she told me about Daddy's 'new friend' but I didn't know she was spending time at your house."
"Well, that's nice. Renesmee certainly is well loved." Edward conceded, pulling his wife into his side in a way that said he wanted her not to argue. Leah realized that he might not be a bad guy at all, which was a relief.
"She is. And like I told her, everyone will learn how to share. Agreed?" Leah looked at them each until they nodded and verbally acknowledged their new commitment. "Good, now, I think maybe we should take her out to eat so that Nessie knows that this is her new family," she gestured to the four of them.
Jacob looked at Leah in shock, while Bella pouted and crossed her arms. But it was Edward who smiled and said, "Now that's an excellent idea. Who needs a lawyer when we have you Miss Clearwater?"
Leah chuckled and placed a kiss to Jacob's cheek. "Come on Black, be a good sport and I'll make it up to you later." Lean smirked in satisfaction as she watched Jacob smile while Bella stormed off in annoyance.