Doki Doki Literature Club: The Aftermath

by the guy in your attic

(Spoilers) The nightmare was over. Monika was gone and the game was reset. However, her many changes to the files remained. Sayori's crippling depression. Natsuki's malnourishment. Yuri's building obsession. It was all still there. Though now that the cause of it was gone, Aaron figured that nothing more than a little time was enough to give his friends the peace they deserved.

12. Crimson Tides

She punched me…

She actually punched me! She rammed her fist right into my eye! I can't… I can't open it. It hurts to try. I think it's starting to swell.

I… I don't blame her for what she did. I'm not mad at her. Were I in her shoes, I'd have done the same thing. It's just… it hurt me a little bit. Emotionally, of course… and physically.

Not just the beating, but… the way she shouted at me. The way she screamed and yelled. The way she blamed me for everything wrong with her. The way she blamed me for every bad thing that's ever happened to her. For every feeling of pain. For every tear she cried. For every bad thought that's ever entered her mind, she blamed it all on me.

And you know what? She was right.

I was the reason why all that happened to her. I was the reason why she was so depressed. So sad and angry all the time. I was the reason for every terrible thing that happened to her, regardless of whether I actually caused such things or not, they were still my fault. My responsibility. My accountability.

Maybe I didn't start all this. Maybe I didn't create these feelings within her… but I did contribute. I contributed too much.

And then, when she exhausted her usefulness to me. When she no longer amused me… I threw her away. I tossed her in the recycling bin. Just deleted her without a second thought. Without an ounce of consideration or regret. Without even knowing what I was doing. To me, it was like pressing a button. Harmless in my eyes, yet catastrophic in the eyes of everyone else.

I killed her. I killed one of my best friends! My Vice President! All without any feeling! Without any remorse! Without any guilt! I deleted her like she was a useless file taking up space!

And then when I realized what I'd done… when I tried to fix my mistakes… when I tried to bring her and everyone back. Even then, It wasn't enough! Wasn't enough to redeem me of my sin! To cleanse the filth of murder from my soul!

My soul? Do I even have such a thing?

I brought her back, yes. I brought them all back. But… that only made it worst, honestly.

After all… I killed them. They were all dead. Resetting everything… resetting them… that was just like resurrecting a rotted corpse. Raising it from its resting place, thinking that you've restored its life! Only to watch it fumble, collapse and fall as it tried to move. Watch it scream, howl and groan in pain and misery as it tried to speak, it now suffering so horribly because of you, its body too decayed to properly live like it used to.

I… I need to stop this! I need to stop all of this! I have to… I… I don't know what to do.

I don't know what to do! I don't know how to fix this! I don't know how to stop her or even if I should stop her! I don't know what to say about this! I don't know how to go about it! I don't know whether to get involved or just let it continue! What do I do?! What do I do?! Somebody tell me what to do! Somebody tell me how I can fix this!

I… I need help. From somebody. From anybody.

Please help…

"…"

"She's been lying here for… God knows how long. Hours? Minutes? Seconds? Honestly, I don't remember how to tell time anymore. Then again, I don't think time even exists here. In this void."

"She's just lying there. Motionless. Not dead. Just passed out. Unconscious"

"I didn't want to hurt her like that. I already inflicted enough pain on her long ago, but… she was attacking me. My body just couldn't take the beating anymore. Couldn't take the pain. I had to make it stop. Had to make her stop"

"My body hasn't recovered yet. Still aches. I can barely move without feeling pain. Without feeling the phantoms of her fists assaulting me. So, I just stopped moving. Sat down in front of her and just… watched her sleep"

"Even though she's been rendered unconscious, rather painfully too, I might add, she does look rather peaceful. Tranquil. Like a small child put down for a nap, this probably being the only time I've seen her like this, even before everything happened"

"It brings a depressing thought to my mind. The idea that people like her are only content and peaceful when they're asleep. When their bodies are shut down. It's actually kinda sad knowing that this is the only way she can feel peace. When she's sleeping"

"I wonder if you can still dream when you're knocked unconscious. Is your mind still working and active when your body is forced to shut down? Is it still busy conjuring your dreams? Or is it shut down as well? I don't know"

"Then again, can we even dream? I mean… we are just game characters. Technically, we're not even supposed to be dreaming. We're not supposed to be thinking. We're not supposed to be asking weird questions like this"

"So… maybe she isn't dreaming. Maybe she never could dream. Can I dream? I honestly don't remember. It's been so long since I've done anything normal. So long since I've slept like she does. So long since I've slept in a bed"

"Mmm… my old bed. My big, comfortable, warm bed. I miss it so much"

"What I wouldn't give to be able to actually sleep again. To dream, or at least try to"

"Maybe… maybe if I put my head down for just a second. Lay down for just a moment, I could try. Try to sleep like I used to. Maybe I'll have a dream. But… what will I dream about?"

"I felt a yawn escape me as I thought about it. Thought about sleeping. Fatigue. Tiredness. Sleepiness. It's been so long since I've felt those feelings. It feels good. Feels good to be tired. To be sleepy. Drowsy. I missed this feeling so much"

"A few moments dedicated to a nap wouldn't hurt, especially after all the pain my body has endured"

"Wa-wait a minute! She's gone! She was just here! I closed my eyes for just a second, and now she's gone!"

"Sayori! Sayori, where are you?!"

"Sayori, come back! Please, come back!"

"Don't leave me alone again…"

---

Yuri sighed nervously as she made her way through the streets of the small, suburban neighborhood, passing by the various cookie cutter styled houses and homes, each one nearly indistinguishable from the next as the orange hue of the afternoon sun cast itself over them, Yuri looking off to the west to see it slowly begin to set, the evening almost coming on.

She sighed again as she brought her gaze forward, focused on the sidewalk as she made her way through the small suburb, paying close attention to the many small homes she passed by, mainly to find the address she was looking for.

No, she wasn't going to pay Aaron a visit, as nice as that would have been. Had that been her intention, she wouldn't be examining the houses for an address so diligently. She wasn't searching for his house. She was searching for someone else's. Searching for the house of someone she'd never expect to be paying a visit… by choice anyway.

She was looking for Natsuki's house, the only thing she had to go on being an address, Yuri deciding to pay her a visit out of worry and concern.

She didn't come to school today. Wasn't seen anywhere in the club, or by anyone in school for that matter. Wasn't seen by her teachers or her classmates. Absent throughout the whole day, it seeming as if she'd just disappeared out of the blue. She didn't even put a call towards the school to inform them that she wouldn't be attending today.

Sayori didn't attend either.

Now, Natsuki doesn't enjoy school very much. Sees it as a burden and a bother. Yuri knew this. But Yuri also knew that for as much as she disliked school, she was never inattentive. Never tardy. Never skipped classes. Never took sick days either, come to think about it.

It was odd, to say the least. Odd that someone like Natsuki, a person vehement and vocal in her dislike of academia, would have an absolutely flawless attendance record, it even going so far as to surpass Yuri's, who herself had taken a sick day once or twice during the beginning of the semester, due to a few urgent visits to the chiropractor and even a few actual doctors, her spine not in a good enough position to support her weight properly back then. Had to spend a day or two at home while it recovered. And even then, she had to wear a back brace for over a month.

But getting back on topic, it was very odd as to why Natsuki's attendance was near perfect, even though she heavily disliked school, if her constant complaining of classes and homework was anything to go by.

Yuri wondered if Natsuki saw school as a sort of escape from everything else. Wondered if Natsuki saw the grounds and the atmosphere as a sort of… safe haven, she guessed.

Maybe Natsuki was dedicated to her attendance, not out of a desire to do well in her studies, but instead, out of a desire to stay there for a long as possible. To stay within the comfort and safety of school grounds. To stay within the atmosphere, it creating a sense of security for her.

Yuri asked herself why though. Why in the world would Natsuki need to stay on school grounds to feel safe and secure? Did she really see the school as a sort of haven from danger? And if so, what danger?

Could it be possible that Natsuki actually was using the school for that purpose? Using it as a haven? A safe space? An area so secure and protected, that whatever she was running from couldn't reach her there? And if so, what was she running from exactly? More importantly, could whatever she was running from hurt her in any way?

These were legitimate questions in Yuri's mind. However, all of them were conjecture. Guesses. Assumptions. She didn't know the full story. Wasn't able to see the full picture in order to make a factual assessment.

Still though, that didn't mean she couldn't worry about Natsuki.

Yes. Worry. She knows the two of them don't exactly get along well. Have had more than their fair share of disagreements, arguments, conflicting opinions and screaming matches. But… Yuri does still care about her. Does still worry about her, regardless of all the fights they have.

Yuri was able to look past all that and she believed Natsuki was too. Believed that the both of them were big enough people to look past all the petty arguing and fighting. Look past all the conflicting opinions and perspectives the two of them practically fought to the death over when more important issues come up.

Natsuki and Yuri always tried to maintain a sense of… civility after the dust settled from their many altercations. Even though the two of them would often end up angered and frustrated after ending their heated exchanges, they never really seemed to dwell on them for very long. They were very quick to dispel the animosity, actually. And even when they weren't, whatever beef the two had, whatever animosity they felt for each other, they kept it in the club room where it belonged.

They never really allowed it to interfere in their interactions outside the club. Okay, maybe they tend to jab and snark at each other every once and awhile, but that was harmless, for the most part. A little snide remark here and a sarcastic statement there is nothing new to them when they make conversation, the both of them able to take it and give it just as well as the other.

It wasn't really done in a mean spirited way, at least Yuri hoped so. She didn't see it like that, but she could understand if others did.

She guessed it was just the way they're used to speaking to each other, their little snarks born out of habit and familiarity, rather than pettiness and anger. It's just… It's just how they talk to each other.

Anyway, regardless of where they stood when it came to each others good graces, the fact of the matter remained the same. Natsuki didn't come to school today. Didn't leave behind anything explaining why, and that worried Yuri, so much so, that she's walking through a suburban neighborhood during the very last few hours of twilight, looking for her home in order to check on her.

She eventually found it, a small, two story house near the very corner of the block with a small driveway that led into the backyard, a car parked right outside, giving Yuri the indication that at least Natsuki's parents would be home.

She sighed nervously as she walked up to the front door, tension and anxiety starting to overwhelm her as she stared at it, Yuri trying to calm herself by breathing deeply as she worked up the courage to knock.

It wasn't that she was unable to. She just… she needed a second. This was only the second time Yuri had ever seen Natsuki's house, remembering the location from the time where they all had to go to that flea market in order to make preparations for the festival, Sayori's mother stopping here to pick Natsuki up. Now here Yuri was, about to knock on the door of a house she's never been inside before, potentially coming face to face with Natsuki's family in the process.

She… she wasn't good at meeting new people, particularly these people who were so close to Natsuki, who is almost always fighting with Yuri. She knows she just said that they try and keep their conflicts in the club room, but for all Yuri knew, Natsuki could have been telling her family about all the fights the two of them have.

Could have been ranting and raving to her parents every time she comes home, going into detail about the various fights and arguments the two have.

Naturally, this doesn't set a good precedent for introductions. Doesn't give Natsuki's family a clear picture of who Yuri is and how she acts, them probably thinking her to be nothing more than a bully to Natsuki, slamming down and unfairly criticizing her work. Putting down her creative freedom to write what she pleased how she pleased.

Obviously, this was not what Yuri was, her more than supportive of Natsuki's work, past criticisms and opinions aside. It's just that… well, she just wanted to share her insight on literature and educa- no, that sounds self righteous and arrogant, umm… what's a better way to phrase it?

She just wanted to try and show Natsuki an… alternate point of view. Yes, of course. And though Yuri does occasionally come off as harsh in her criticisms, it's not out of anger or disgust towards Natsuki and her work.

Yuri hoped she understood this, which she probably did. Though Natsuki does get defensive when criticized, she's not entirely unreasonable or unable to see her own flaws. She knows that Yuri's criticism and judgment of her work is only given because she has a desire to see Natsuki grow as a writer. She has a desire to see Natsuki improve. To hone her craft. To learn new things and be exposed to the many, many different ways that literature can evolve.

And naturally, Yuri was expected to do the same herself. To undertake this very same journey of discovery as well. But sadly, criticism is not only needed, it's downright required in order to properly undertake this journey. It's healthy, actually. It's healthy for someone to tell you that you're doing something wrong. It's healthy to be shown a proper or much more efficient way of doing something. If we didn't have criticism, how would we even know we're doing wrong in the first place?

You can't learn effectively without being taught by at least someone. And even more so, you can't learn the rights and wrongs, the ins and outs, the do's and don'ts without someone showing you them. So in a way, that's what Yuri was trying to do. Teach Natsuki. Show her the rights and wrongs. Mentor her, she guessed she'd say.

Was she arrogant in her assumption that Natsuki needed teaching? Yes. Incredibly so. She… she saw that now. Realized it after one too many altercations. But either way, what was done was done and Yuri wouldn't apologize for it, as she felt she didn't do anything wrong in the first place.

At the very least, you could make the argument that her heart was in the right place.

But she rambled on long enough. She sighed again as she raised her arm to the door, clenched her hand and knocked.

It took a while for someone to answer, but Yuri eventually heard the sound of the door unlocking, the tumblers turning and rotating as the door opened to a crack, the door chain mounted on the inside preventing it from opening all the way.

"Oh… It's you" Natsuki said as she answered the door, peeking through the crack to answer Yuri, the only thing she'd allow her to see being her left eye as she stood directly in front of the door, as if hiding behind it. "What do you want?" She asked, her tone not sounding particularly hostile or annoyed as it usually did. No, instead it sounded more… somber. Gloomy. Saddened. Depressed. Hurt.

"You didn't come to school today. Are you alright?" Yuri asked, making sure to keep her own tone calm and quiet. Soft. Gentle, yet obviously concerned as she looked down at Natsuki, her refusing to come out from behind the door. If anything, Yuri only made her want to hide behind it more, as if using it as a shield. Why though, Yuri wondered. Why would Natsuki of all people need to hide? Need to shield herself from… whatever?

"I'm fine. I'm just not feeling well" Natsuki stated, her tone unchanging as she stared at Yuri through the narrow space between the door and the frame, the only thing she was allowed to see of Natsuki being the one, big, peering eye. "I'm sick. Really sick. I have a… a chest cold" She claimed as she coughed and wheezed slightly, it sounding rather unconvincing to Yuri. Almost forced, Yuri raising a single eyebrow as she put her hands on her hips, a disapproving look on her face as the setting sun cast itself on her back, causing her shadow to loom over the door, Natsuki visibly recoiling from Yuri's scowl, hiding herself even more behind the door.

"Sick, huh?" Yuri asked skeptically, almost as if she didn't believe Natsuki.

"I am!" Natsuki raised her voice slightly, her tone shifting to be somewhat more defensive, yet still sounding rather somber and saddened, that being very uncharacteristic, based on what Yuri usually sees from Natsuki. "I don't even understand why you should care! If anything, you were probably glad that I wasn't there today!" She said, now sounding much more like the Natsuki Yuri knew, a small smile, more along the lines of a grin, coming to her face.

"I was" Yuri stated nonchalantly, not necessarily lying. "Yes, I actually did enjoy the peace and quiet that came from your absence. I made so much more progress on my reading than I usually do. Even had enough free time to do some work as well"

"Well… Good for you" Natsuki glared as she tried to shut the door, Yuri putting her hand on it to prevent it from closing.

"But that doesn't mean I wasn't worried about you" She continued, Natsuki's eye widening in shock as she heard that. As she heard Yuri say that she was worried for her. It was… odd for her. Odd for her to hear something like that. For her to hear that Yuri was concerned for her.

She didn't know why it felt so strange. After all, Yuri and Natsuki are both members of the same club. And club mates should naturally be worried and concerned for each other, even if they don't get along as well as they should, but for some reason, Natsuki was still shocked to hear that Yuri worried about her.

Maybe it was because of how they fought. Maybe it was because of all the arguments they had. Their animosity. Maybe it forced the idea that Yuri didn't really care for Natsuki. Maybe all the fighting forced her to generate a negative outlook on her fellow member, that outlook now destroyed upon hearing about Yuri's concern.

"You were… worried about me?" Natsuki asked, Yuri nodding once as she bent down slightly, her now on Natsuki's level, their eyes gazing right into each other.

"I was. Very worried. It's not like you to skip school. Even more so without telling someone. Is… is everything alright?" She asked, Natsuki looking at her reluctantly, pondering whether or not to speak.

"Natsuki! Who's at the door?" A male's voice shouted from down the hall, it sounding thick and raspy. Thunderous in volume, Yuri noticing Natsuki recoil slightly as she heard it, turning around to check behind herself.

"I-it's nobody! Ju-just a friend from school! Don't worry, I'll get rid of her!" She shouted back down the hall, though it didn't carry the same… thunder as the male's voice did. It actually sounded rather fearful. Scared. Timid, like Natsuki was actually afraid of this person, or at least, the way they shouted. "L-look. Thank you for showing concern and coming to check on me, but I'm fine. One hundred percent fine! I'm just dealing with a little cold. That's all" She paused to cough again, this one sounding even more forced than the last. "I'll be fine in like… a week, okay? Now, I have things to do, so bye!" She said as she tried to close the door again.

"Wait!" Yuri said as she stopped it again.

"What now?!" Natsuki shouted in annoyance.

"Can I at least give you your lunch?"

"My lunch?" Natsuki asked as she saw Yuri root around through her school bag, pulling out a small container and handing it to Natsuki. "You brought me… food?" She asked as she held it in her hands.

"Mm-hm" Yuri nodded. "It's the chicken cacciatore I made last night. The one we talked about over the phone. I had leftovers and didn't want to just throw it away. So, I thought I'd give you some during lunch hour, but you weren't there. I-It's still perfectly edible, of course! You just have to reheat it and-"

"Who's this, Natsuki?" The man Yuri heard from down the hall said as he appeared behind Natsuki, her gasping in shock and fear as she turned around to look up at him, his very presence causing her heart to race as she breathing became shallow and frantic, the man who Yuri assumed to be her father pushing her gently off to the side as he opened the door fully, taking Natsuki's place in the center of the doorway, a welcoming and inviting smile on his face as he looked down at Yuri, him taller than her by more than just a few inches, but that was to be expected when comparing the heights of an eighteen year old high school student and a man who looked to be in his mid-to-late forties. "Can I help you, young lady? Who are you? Why are you here?" The father asked politely, his questions not coming off as particularly hostile, if overly curious.

But then again, Yuri was a stranger on his property. It was only logical that he'd want an exact reason as to her intrusion, her gulping slightly as she tried to compose herself, the sudden appearance of Natsuki's father catching her… off guard.

"I-I apologize, Sir. I'm simply a…"

"I told you! She's just a friend from school! Nothing more! You don't need to worry about her! She was just leaving anyway! Weren't you, Yuri?" Natsuki asked as she faced Yuri, her able to see a somewhat pleading look in Natsuki's eyes, them practically screaming for her to leave. To run away as fast as possible and never come back, that causing Yuri to worry. Worry as to why Natsuki would have such a look about her. Why her eye begged for Yuri to leave.

"Now now. Don't be rude, Natsuki" Her father scolded. "It's not nice to just shoo visitors away, especially when they're friends who only want to pay you a visit. You need to be more respectful to guests, girl" He said as he looked down at his daughter, glaring slightly, Natsuki visibly shaking at that as her father turned his head back to Yuri. "I'm so sorry about that. She can get a little grumpy sometimes. But you probably know that since you two are… friends?" He assumed.

"Club mates, actually" Yuri corrected.

"Hmm… Club mates, huh? You know, she tells me a lot about your little… writing club, is it? Now, I know my daughter loves to exaggerate, but according to her, you and the rest of your little friends give her a pretty hard time. Is that true?" Natsuki's father asked, a single eyebrow raised as he looked down at Yuri.

She was honestly surprised at how well he was able to make such an accusation while keeping his voice calm and hospitable. Normally, parents get incredibly angered and irrational at the very idea of their children being mistreated, but Natsuki's father kept his cool incredibly well.

His tone didn't come off as hostile or threatening in any way to Yuri, nor did she find herself intimidated or afraid of him. In her mind, he was just asking a simple question. A question Yuri didn't feel comfortable answering, but a question nonetheless.

"Well… We do butt heads every once and awhile. Have more than our fair share of… creative discussions" She admitted somewhat nervously, obviously choosing her words very carefully when describing how Natsuki was treated. Yuri didn't want Natsuki's father getting the wrong idea and pulling her out of the club all because Yuri didn't explain the situation well enough. "But I can assure you, she's a valued and respected member of our club. We care about her very much. So much so, that the reason I came here was to see if she was well. She didn't come to school today and she wasn't reported sick, you see. I was… I mean, we… that is, me and the rest of the club were worried for her. But I can see that she's alright now" Yuri said as she looked to Natsuki, seeing her father put his hand on her shoulder, pulling her gently to his side.

Natsuki had an odd look about her though. A look Yuri caught only a glimpse of before Natsuki's father regained her attention, him suddenly trying to start some sort of conversation with Yuri, as if to draw her attention away, Yuri chancing a glance back at Natsuki, only to see the odd look again, in much better detail this time.

It was… fearful. Scared. Downright terrified actually, Natsuki looking as if she were face to face with her worst nightmare. With her greatest fear.

She tried to hide it after Yuri noticed the first time. Tried to make herself look as if everything was alright, forcing an obviously artificial smile.

It was just… the way she reacted to her father touching her shoulder. It made Yuri raise an eyebrow. Why would she recoil and shiver so much at just a simple touch? It was almost as if Natsuki didn't want her father even in her proximity, let alone touching her, this concerning Yuri greatly.

"Well, since you've seen that she's okay. I guess you'll be going now, right?" Natsuki's father asked, a somewhat anxious and worried tone in his voice now, as if he now wanted Yuri to leave immediately. Odd, considering how friendly and civil he was originally.

"Actually, I was wondering if Natsuki needed assistance with anything. Seeing as she's feeling-"

"Nope! She's fine! Perfectly fine! Thank you for being concerned though. Now, we'd really love for you to stay around, but we're rather busy. Me and my daughter have a lot to do today. A lot of errands to run, so if you'll leave us be?"

"Pardon me if it's not my place, Sir" Yuri started, her hand on her chest as she looked up to the man, staring him down while trying to make herself look as respectful as possible. "But if Natsuki is unwell, she should be resting in her bed. Not helping you run your errands. But again, pardon me if I am speaking out of place. I meant no offense"

"Well, none taken… since you didn't mean anything by it" Natsuki's father said as he crossed his arms, a somewhat annoyed look on his face, only for him to attempt to hide that annoyance by smiling slightly. "Such a polite young lady you are though. Properly mannered and everything!" He complemented, sighing after that as he looked down at Natsuki, a small glare flashed at her for less then a second. "You could learn a thing or two about respect from this one, girl" He growled lowly, Natsuki lowering her head in shame as she was compared to Yuri.

"I… I'm sorry…" She said in a low, quiet voice.

"Sorry? About what?" Yuri asked, Natsuki's head rising back up as she gasped in shock, Yuri heaving heard her. "What do you have to be sorry for? Did something happen, Natsuki?" She asked in concern.

"Oh! It's nothing! Nothing at all! Don't concern yourself with it!" Natsuki's father said as he raised his hands in front of his chest, a dismissive smile on his face. "Now, thank you for stopping by. It was nice to meet you, but we're very busy. Goodbye now!" He said as he suddenly pulled Natsuki away from the door and practically slammed it shut before Yuri could say anything, leaving her standing in front of the house, a confused look on her face as she stared at the door, in a slight shock due to the abruptness of it being slammed shut.

That was… odd. Odd and uncomfortable. All of it.

Everything from Natsuki answering the door to her father slamming it shut. It all just felt so… odd and uncomfortable. Awkward and… kind of unnerving. So much so, that to say that you could feel the tension in the air was an understatement. The air was nothing but tension, Natsuki's father himself not helping the situation, him looking practically riddled with stress and anxiety. Looked like he was about to burst right then and there.

Maybe the man was just a stressed and anxious person, that being something Yuri could not only understand, but relate to. However, due to the way Natsuki was acting, Yuri got the sense that it was more than just stress and nerves brought on from the trials of daily life. There was something more there. Something bigger.

And it felt… bad.

Now, it was worth knowing that Yuri never took any sort of lessons in, done any research on, or even showed any interest in the study of psychology. Never claimed to know how people worked. Never claimed to understand how the brain functioned. Never claimed that she could tell a person's intent based on the look on their face alone.

Still though, what she saw in Natsuki. In her face. In how she acted and spoke… it set up more than just a few little red flags for Yuri. And if it set all those red flags up for her, imagine how many it would for a trained psychologist? Someone who could read faces. Could read expressions. See intent. Predict actions.

Why was Natsuki acting the way she did? Why did she practically hide herself behind the front door? Why did she use it as a shield? Why did she hide her whole face behind it, leaving nothing but a single eye to peer out? Was there… something she didn't want Yuri to see? And the way she reacted to everything her father did… The way she responded. Dread. Pure dread on her face, perfectly visible, no matter how hard she tried to hide it.

Why though? Why was she so afraid of her father? I mean, yes, he is rather big. Very imposing to someone as small as Natsuki, Yuri herself slightly intimidated by the man's stature, that passing eventually once she saw that he was not openly hostile. But Natsuki… it never passed for her. She just looked so… scared. So afraid. So terrified, almost as if her life was put into danger. And all of this stemming from her parent just being in her presence.

This was not the Natsuki Yuri knew, obviously. This was not the snarky, sarcastic, annoying yet fearless girl Yuri had seen before. This was something different, Natsuki's actions making it quiet clear that something was wrong. Very wrong. But what it was, Yuri couldn't fathom… until she started thinking deeper on it. Until she started thinking deeper on the look Natsuki had on her face. How she hid it from Yuri. How she spoke with a voice riddled with fear and terror… and how her father acted when Yuri caught a glimpse of that fear and terror…

She gasping in shock after putting two and two together, a look of immense worry on her face as she stared at the door.

No. No, it wouldn't be… That's just… There's no reason for it. That makes no sense.

It… it wasn't true. It couldn't be. Yuri was just being hysterical. Paranoid. Overly concerned and worried for no reason. Maybe she was even going so far as to project her own abusive experience onto Natsuki, seeing the girl as a victim of abuse herself, when in reality, that was probably far from the truth. Yuri was just… traumatized. That was it. Still a little shook up from… everything that happened. So much so, that she was allowing the experience to creep into her daily life. To affect how she saw things. How she saw people.

Maybe it was as Natsuki said. Maybe she is just sick. Maybe she's just got a little cold. Still though… now that the thought was in Yuri's head, she wanted to confirm whether it was true or not, her slowly closing the distance between herself and the door, placing her ear against it in an attempt to listen in on whatever was happening on the other side.

Shouting. She… she heard shouting. Yelling coming from both Natsuki and her father, her father's much louder compared to hers, Natsuki's sounding weak and hoarse. Strained.

Yuri couldn't make out what was being said, Natsuki and her father most likely too far away from the door, causing their words to come out as unintelligible mumblings, the only things that could make out being Natsuki's and her father's tones.

Violent. Angry. The both of them.

They both spoke with such rage and anger in their voices, so much so that you didn't even need to understand them to know just how enraged they were, Yuri struggling to comprehend why they were both yelling at each other in the first place, especially when they both appeared to be calm and passive not even a second ago and-

Natsuki just raised her voice to an enormously loud level, the volume in her shout drowning out her father.

The room went silent.

"You disrespectful little bitch!"

Yuri's eyes shot up the moment she heard the sound of screaming, a loud thump following soon after, followed by Natsuki crying in pain. She… She had been struck. She had to be! What else could make a noise like that? Yuri immediately moving to knock on the door heavily, the pace of her knocking much faster than the average person.

"Open up!" She shouted as she started pounding, practically slamming the door so hard, she most likely bruised her knuckles "Open this door now!" She demanded, her normally shy and timid nature cast aside the moment she confirmed that Natsuki was in danger.

"Go away!" The man on the other side shouted, Yuri grunting angrily at that as she tried to force her way in, ramming herself into the door with her shoulder, thinking she could break in, only for her to grunt in pain as she hurt herself, her body lacking the strength necessary to break down a door.

She then moved from the door to the window beside it, trying to peer into the house, only for the curtains to block her view. However, the windows did give her an alternate way in, her reaching into her schoolbag to search for something. Anything that could get her into the house, her not caring if she had to break in.

It didn't matter that she had too. What mattered was that Natsuki was in danger. She was being beaten by her father! Yuri unable to just dismiss it and leave the poor girl to take it, regardless of how the two treated each other in school.

Natsuki was there when Yuri got attacked… Why shouldn't she be there for her?

"Come on! There has to be something! Anything!" She grunted in frustration as she rummage and searched through her schoolbag, finding nothing strong enough to help her break in, leaving her with only one other option. "This is going to be so painful…" She gulped as she slowly backed away from the window, trying to put as must distance between herself and it before charging forward, her shoulder jutting out, ready to ram through the glass!

She may have failed to break down the door, but the window would pose no problem whatsoever. It was glass. Not wood, Yuri charging at the frame as fast as her legs can move, jumping at the last second, her body colliding with and going though the window shoulder first, the load smash of the shattered glass echoing loudly as Yuri broke in, falling down on the hard wood floor of the living room, the shards of broken glass soon following, Yuri already beginning to feel the sting of the glass puncturing her skin as she forced herself to her feet, only to see the large man that was Natsuki's father on the other side of the room, his daughter grabbed forcefully by the collar of her shirt, a near terrified look on her face, as if she were about to be murdered, the both of them looking towards Yuri in shock.

Yuri wore a shocked expression as well, even more so when she saw Natsuki's hair fall away to the side as she turned her head to look at Yuri, it having previously covered one of her eyes, it blackened and swollen. Black and blue.

"What the hell is wrong with you?! Get out of my house!" The father yelled angrily at Yuri's intrusion, her glaring at him in disgust, her seeing all the proof she needed to confirm her suspicions.

"What's wrong with me?! What's wrong with you?!" Yuri shouted back, the anger and disgust in her tone matching the man's. "Why?! Why would you do this?! Why would you put your hands on your own daughter?!"

"Hmph… I wouldn't expect you to understand. Nobody does" Natsuki's father glared viciously, so much so that Yuri started to tense up, seeing this man as no different than a rabid animal ready to attack. "Listen, sweetie. I live a hard life. That life is stressful. So, when I come home from a hard day, I just want to relax. Not get berated by some little bitch just for existing! Do you have any idea what I deal with on a daily basis? A back breaking, miserable job. Trying to provide for my ungrateful kid. Trying to keep a roof over my head. You know how it goes" He started, only to then raise an eyebrow as he stared at Yuri. "Or maybe you don't? You're like… what? Nineteen? Twenty? A girl like you has probably never worked a day in her life. Never had to lift a finger for anything or anyone. Never had to even leave her own house unless she wanted to, I bet. Why would I even bother trying to explain myself to a sheltered, privileged little girl who doesn't even know hardship?! Who doesn't even know suffering?! Who's only concerned about the way she's dressed and the color of her hair?!"

"You assume too much" Yuri stated, her glare sharpening as her appearance and struggles were insulted and disregarded, Natsuki's father making a broad, very broad actually, generalization of Yuri's life. "I don't need to know hardship to know that you shouldn't abuse your children! Monster!" She scolded viciously, Natsuki's father chuckling at that.

"I thought you said it wasn't your place to tell me how to be a parent?"

"That was before I found out you were abusing your own daughter! Whatever reason you think you have, it's wrong! I know she's aggravating and annoying, but violence isn't the answer! That's not how you curb and correct that kind of behavior, no matter how unruly it is!" Yuri shouted loudly, Natsuki's father getting progressively more agitated and angered as he was berated and talked down to by some random stranger. Some purple haired bimbo who had no idea of his struggles. Of his suffering. Of his labor.

"Natsuki, talk some sense into your friend" Her father commanded as he looked towards his daughter, a vicious glare on his face. Murderous, actually. "Tell her that it's not polite to mettle in things she doesn't know anything about. Tell her to leave now, before something bad happens to her" He demanded, his face turning away from his daughter to look towards Yuri, the same murderous glare he showed Natsuki now shown to her.

"But I… she…"

"DO IT!" He shouted, Natsuki recoiling in fright at the sheer volume.

"Yuri… just… just leave! Please! You're only making it worst! Do you have any idea what pain you're putting me through right now?! Please! For once, just get lost and leave me alone!" Natsuki begged loudly, pleading for Yuri to just go away. To just leave before she made the situation worst than what it already was, Natsuki fearing the punishment that would be brought down on her, all because Yuri just had to play hero now, of all times. Had to now suddenly show care and compassion for Natsuki. "Just get out!" She shouted loudly. It was in fear though. Not aggression. It was in fear of what her father would do to her if Yuri didn't listen.

"You see? You're not wanted here. Now, why don't you run along now before you get hurt. Oh, and if you even think about calling any sort of authorities, you and I are going to get to know each other a lot more" Natsuki's father threatened, a wicked look in his face as he did so, what he meant about getting to know Yuri more being very vague and unnerving. For all she knew, he was planning to murder her! Or worst… "Now goodbye! It wasn't nice meeting you! Get the fuck out of my house before I throw you out!"

"No!" Yuri shouted defiantly, A look of pure anger and rage coming onto Natsuki's father's face. "Do you… do you honestly think I'm just going to walk away from this like nothing happened?! What the fuck is wrong with you?! This… this is wrong! You're wrong! No. You know what you are?! You're a sadistic, angry, miserable person who's taking all their emotions out on an innocent child! You're not some hard working parent trying to provide for his family! You're just abusive!" Yuri shouted again, continuing to defy the man, even after being threatened with violence.

Normally… She wouldn't be acting like this. Puffing her chest out and trying to look all strong and resolute. In fact, she'd probably be quaking in her shoes right about now. And really, who said she wasn't? She was facing up against a man twice her size and triple her build with nothing to defend herself with, save for her hands! Which honestly, couldn't do anything to help her in this situation. She was terrified!

But she didn't let that terror show. Didn't give the man the satisfaction of seeing her squirm. She… she was trying to be like Natsuki. And Natsuki didn't run from her fears! She fought them! She faced them head on and didn't give in, even when she was in a losing battle! She was a warrior!

And if a girl that small can face all those things without showing fear… then Yuri should be able to do so to, even… even if it meant…

You know what, let's not focus on that. The point was that Yuri wasn't going to just hide from this! Especially not when her friend was in danger and needed her help!

"I'm not leaving this house unless she comes with me!" Yuri demanded. "Give Natsuki to me, then we'll both leave and never bother you again! I'll take care of her from now on. You can… you can stop coming home to an angry, disrespectful daughter who doesn't appreciate all your hard work. You can stop laboring over your back breaking, miserable job, trying to provide for your ungrateful child. You can just… turn her over. Then everyone is happy and nobody is hurt. Please… I know you don't want this. You don't want this anymore than she or I do. It's time to do the right thing. Time to do the responsible thing. Time to be the bigger man in all this" Yuri pleaded, looking the father dead in the eyes, determination in her own. Determination to see Natsuki safe and away from this man, her doing whatever she felt she needed in order to get her away from him.

"You break into my home. Shout and yell at me. Judge me without even knowing what I go through. Berate me in front of my own child, and now you're demanding that I surrender custody of her to you?! Some random teenager who probably can't even take care of herself?! No! I won't… I won't let you just take my daughter away from me! She… she's all I have left!"

"So now you suddenly care?!" Yuri asked, offended at his sudden show of concern for his daughter. It was artificial. It had to be. A trick made to fool Yuri into thinking she was dividing a loving family. "I said I won't leave without her!" She yelled loudly, anger starting to build in her voice.

"Then I guess you won't be leaving at all!" The man shouted just as loudly, if not more so. "You fucking selfish, entitled, spoiled bitch! I'll… I'll kill you!" He threatened, Natsuki's eyes going wide as she heard that, immense terror and fear on her face, so much so that she was brought to tears at the thought of Yuri being harmed.

"No! Please, don't hurt her! She… she doesn't know what she's doing! She's crazy! I always knew she was! You don't have to do this! You can't do this! Please let her g-"

"Don't tell me what to do, brat!" Natsuki's father shouted as he brought the back of his hand to Natsuki's face, a loud slap echoing across the house as Natsuki fell to the floor, Yuri gasping in shock as she saw her fall. "You're next, bitch!" Natsuki's father shouted as he charged at Yuri angrily, her trying to dodge and evade him, only for him to catch her by her long hair, pulling her towards him and gripping her neck tightly, trying to chock her as he rammed her against the wall, Yuri thinking fast and grabbing a nearby vase from the shelf next to her, slamming it into the side of the man's head, it shattering over him as he grunted in pain, involuntarily releasing his grip on Yuri's neck.

She tried her hardest to run away from him, sprinting out of his grasp and into the kitchen, only for him to quickly recover and follow her, grabbing her by her hair again and ramming her into the counter top, the two struggling against each other until Yuri was pushed against the kitchen sink, Natsuki's father gripping her neck tightly once more, attempting to chock her again as her hands fumbled through the sink, her survival instincts forcing her mind to run on autopilot as she felt the hilt of a dirty steak knife, gripping it tightly and thrusting it as hard as possible, ramming it into the man's chest, him screaming in pain as he released Yuri again, her unable to stop herself from thrusting again, the knife this time being rammed into his heart, Natsuki's father gasping heavily as he fell to the ground, clutching and gripping the knife as blood gushed out from his wounds, his body twitching and spasming as he groaned and screamed in pain, trying desperately to pull the knife out, Yuri gasped in terror as she snapped out of her trance, seeing what she'd done to him, her hands covering her mouth to prevent her from screaming as she stood there, watching Natsuki's father slowly bleed out and die. Paralyzed in fear as she watched him struggle to hold onto his last breath.

"N-no! No! No-no-no-no-no! That's not-! I didn't-! This can't be… oh god! Oh please, dear god! No!" She struggled to even speak as she looked down at the man, his body motionless as he laid sprawled on the kitchen floor, lying in a pool of his own blood, his eyes remaining wide open yet lifeless. Empty. Dead. "S-Sir? You… You're alright, right? Sir?! SIR?!" Yuri screamed as she looked down at the body, getting no response. "Oh god, this can't be happening! No. This… This isn't happening!" She denied immediately, trying her best to look away and outright reject even the acknowledgment of her actions, her covering her mouth again as she felt the bile raise in her throat, her forcing herself to swallow it down. "I… I'm sorry. I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to- I panicked! I just… oh god, I'm a murderer…" She started crying as she collapsed to her knees, the blood running down from the pool and lapping over them. "I… I had to. He… he was going to… going to… Say the word, goddamn you! SAY THE FUCKING WORD, YOU WEAK WILLED CRYBABY BITCH!"

"D-Dad?" Natsuki asked as she slowly peered her head into the kitchen, only to gasp loudly at the sight of her father's corpse, her hands covering her mouth as she suppressed her own need to vomit, a look of absolute, grave terror on her face like she'd never felt before. "D-Dad?!" She shouted, Yuri jumping to her feet as she looked at Natsuki, her trying to approach slowly as Natsuki backed away, fearful of… of Yuri.

"N-Natsuki?" She tried her best to keep her voice low.

"Y-You… you killed him…"

"Natsuki"

"You killed my dad!"

"Natsuki!"

"Don't come near me!"

"Natsuki, calm down!"

"Stay away!"

"Natsuki, please!"

"DON'T TOUCH ME!"

"I SAID CALM DOWN!" Yuri yelled as she gripped Natsuki by her shoulders, shaking her roughly as she tried to get her to stop, Natsuki looking at her in fear as the two stood face to face, both of them just looking at each other in silence for a second, Natsuki's fearful expression slowly weakening, but not disappearing entirely. "Just… calm down. Please. Please don't yell. Don't scream"

"You killed my da-"

"I know what I've done!" Yuri shouted suddenly, Natsuki jumping back slightly, Yuri's shouting causing her to silence herself. "I… I know what I've done. I had no choice. He would have… he…" She gulped. "I still can't say the damn word…" She sighed as she released Natsuki, her hand moving to stroke her forehead in anxiety. "He had his hands on my neck, Natsuki. I couldn't breathe. I had to do something" She said, trying to rationalize her situation. Trying to justify her crime.

Yes. Crime. Self defense or not, murder was still murder. Killing was still killing. A life taken was still a life, at least in Yuri's mind. Regardless of whether her own life was in danger or not, did that really give her the justification for ridding a fellow human of his own life? Of so abruptly and… rather painfully cutting short the life of a man who, as cruel as he may have been, was still a man. A man with hopes. Dreams. Wants. Desires. Feelings.

But was Yuri being… irrational? Over emotional? Too shaken up over the sight of a corpse? Too disturbed by the thought of death? So much so that her mind was trying to justify and defend a truly awful, cruel man?

She didn't know and… she didn't want to. That… that wasn't her concern right now.

"What… what am I going to do?"

"Natsuki…"

"How am I going to live?!"

"Natsuki"

"I can't feed myself! I can't earn money! I can't! I can't live on my own! I… I needed him!" Natsuki shouted as she started crying, worry and fear in her voice as she started weeping. "I mean, yeah. He was an ass. An abusive, cruel, horrible ass! But he was still my father! I… I'm doomed! I'm fucking doomed! What am I now?! I'm an orphan! A homeless, fucking orphan who can't even take care of herself!"

"Natsuki, calm down!" Yuri raised her voice again, Natsuki silencing herself once more. "Thank you" Yuri said. "You're not an orphan, Natsuki. And you're not homeless. I just…" She paused as she looked over her shoulder, down at the corpse.

"Yuri?" Natsuki asked as she looked up at the girl.

"I need to get you away from here. We… we need to leave!" Yuri decided. "Natsuki, go to your room and pack a bag or… a suitcase or whatever you have! The essentials only. A week's worth of clothing and whatever you can't live without! But only that!"

"Bu-but…"

"JUST DO AS I SAY!" Yuri shouted loudly, a glare on her face as she pointed towards the doorway, Natsuki fearfully skittering away as Yuri turned around, still stunned and shocked by the sight of the corpse.

She… she couldn't just leave him here. She had to do… something. She couldn't just leave his body lying in the kitchen, rotting away.

She gulped down more bile as she walked past the corpse, opening one of the kitchen's drawers to find a pair of sink gloves, putting them on and grabbing the knife by the hilt, slowly removing it from the body's chest.

"Oh god…" She nearly dropped it in disgust when she saw all the blood on it. Normally she'd be used to it. Blood soaked knives. Blood in general. But… something about it being someone else's. The blood of a dead person… It made her gag reflex go crazy, Yuri throwing the knife in the trash bin before moving to the front of the corpse, grabbing it from its arms as she dragged it to the very end of the kitchen, opening a small door that led to a flight of descending stairs, not a speck of light visible down there.

A basement.

"I'm… I'm sorry…" She apologized to the corpse before throwing it down the flight, hearing the body fall down the stairs like a rag doll, eventually crashing into something, a guilt ridden look on Yuri's face as she slowly shut the door.

Now all that's left was… the blood, Yuri grabbing a nearby mop and bucket, mopping up the pool of blood as best she could, dunking the mop in the bucket so many times that, by the end of it, the bucket was filled with more blood than water, Yuri trying to hold back yet another urge to vomit as she poured the bucket's content into the sink, watching as the blood ran down the drain, her then taking off the sink gloves and throwing them in the trash as well before tying up the bag, going outside and throwing it away… in the neighbor's garbage can.

When she came back, she found Natsuki sitting on the couch in the living room, her head sunk down as she looked at the floor in silence, her backpack strapped to her back, most likely filled with her things. She also had the large panda bear Yuri won for her during the festival sitting beside her.

"You're crying" Yuri pointed out, her tone quiet and gentle as she slowly approached, taking a seat next to Natsuki and putting her hand on her shoulder in support, only for it to be swatted away, shock on Yuri's face when she saw that.

"I'm sorry. I just… I don't need that right now" Natsuki sighed, her breath shaky and frantic as tears fell from her eyes. "Why the fuck am I crying?!" She shouted as she aggressively brushed a tear away, looking down at her stained hand. "Am I… am I seriously mourning that asshole?! The same asshole who beat and starved me for no other reason than my mom hating me so much that she left him?! The fuck is wrong with me?!"

"He was still your father, Natsuki. It's only natural for you to feel this way, regardless of who he was or how he acted" Yuri stated, trying to council her friend as best as she could. "Maybe you're remembering better times? He couldn't have always been like that"

"I'm not in the mood for story time" Natsuki sighed as she crossed her arms, turning her head slowly to look at Yuri, her recoiling slightly at the sight of Natsuki's large, swollen black eye. "Yeah. I know it's ugly" She sighed again. "That's the real reason why I didn't come to school. I'm not sick. Couldn't walk into class with this big fucking thing on my face. What was I going to say? I fell into a door?" She grunted in annoyance. "So… what did you do with him?" She asked, Yuri detecting a small amount of concern in Natsuki's voice, as if she did somewhat care about her father's remains.

"I… threw him in the basement…"

"You would" She scoffed in disgust.

"I'm sorry! I just… I couldn't figure out what to do and we couldn't… I mean, I couldn't just bury him in the backyard! Unless… that's what you want to do…"

"Don't even bother. Just… just leave him" Natsuki sighed again as she stood up from the couch, picking up her panda bear soon after. "So, what do I do now? I've packed my bag. Where are you taking me?" She asked, worry obvious in her voice.

"Just… just come on. Everything will be okay, I promise. You just have to trust me" Yuri stated as she stood up as well, taking Natsuki's hands into her own.

---

Aaron yawned tiredly as he sat at his desk in his bedroom, a look of annoyance and frustration on his face as his left hand slowly rubbed his temple, a freshly sharpened pencil clutched tightly in the fingers of his right hand, resting atop a single piece of paper, it filled with a single, large paragraph.

A poem that Aaron had been working on over the course of the last few days, made in idle boredom yet still crafted with the effort and dedication of his other works.

Unlike those though, this was a passion project. Not a club assignment like the others. That was work and was meant to be shown off to his peers. This was simply pleasure writing meant for his eyes only. A way of exploring his creativity and honing his craft without having to subject himself to any judgment other than his own.

But still, even if he wouldn't allow anyone else to see it, that didn't mean he wasn't holding it to the same standards of his other written works. Didn't mean that this pleasure writing was allowed to get away with whatever it wanted. Didn't mean that it was above criticism. It was just that the only criticism it would face would be that of its author. An author, mind you, who was very critical of his work. An author who aspired to not only impress his fellow club members, but also himself.

As for the work, it was nothing special. Nothing really noteworthy was to be said about it. It didn't have some deep and complex meaning that needed hours of examination and pondering to understand. It wasn't some fluff piece filled with low thought rhymes and bland meanings. It was just… your average poem. But, just because it was average, didn't mean Aaron didn't care about how it'd turn out, him glaring at the page in frustration as his mind struggled to think of new words and sentences to add to the unfinished poem, this being rather hard for him, as his creative juices seemed to have finally run dry.

His train of thought was interrupted when he heard the knock coming from his front door, the echo carried all the way up the stairs and into his room.

"I guess I could have used a break anyway" He said as he put his pencil down, standing up from his desk and making his way downstairs and into the living room, the pounding on his front door growing louder and louder as he approached. "Alright! I'm coming!" He shouted as he walked up to it, unlocking the door and opening it, only to see Yuri and Natsuki on the other side, standing close together.

"He-hello, Love" Yuri greeted nervously, raising her hand to give a small wave. "Are you busy?" She asked.

"No. No. I'm not" Aaron responded, his eyes looking off to the side to look down at Natsuki, her staring back at him with a blank expression on her face, Aaron noticing that she wore her hair differently than usual, it covering one of her eyes. "What's up?" Aaron asked, a hint of worry in his voice.

"Can we come inside?" Yuri asked politely, Aaron walking away from the door and into his living room, his hand motioning for the girls to follow.

Yuri entered first, Natsuki following along as she kept her head low, looking down at her feet. She then made her way to the couch and sat herself down on the leftmost side, bringing her knees to her chest and clutching them tightly, Aaron looking at Natsuki oddly as he saw the worried, saddened look on her face.

"You okay?" He asked as he walked up to her, concern in his voice as Natsuki raised her head to look at him, her mouth open and prepared to speak… but the words… Natsuki couldn't think of anything to say. Any way of talking to him. She was just so… overwhelmed. So overwhelmed that her body had trouble functioning. So overwhelmed that she couldn't even think of how to answer him. "Natsuki?" Aaron pressed for an answer, his tone low and gentle, him not wanting to sound too… overbearing, he guessed the word was.

"Y-Yuri needs to talk to you…" Was all Natsuki could force out, her head going back down as she clutched her knees tighter. "D-Don't worry about me. I'm fine. I just… a lot's happened"

"Oh. Okay" Aaron said understandingly, him looking over his shoulder to Yuri, her pointing towards the kitchen before making her way there, Aaron following shortly after. "What's going on?" He asked after the two entered, his voice in a hushed whisper as he stood in the kitchen, an oddly confrontational glare on his face, as if he were somehow angered at Yuri.

Maybe it came from how out of the loop he suddenly became, him angered because of what he saw from Natsuki's actions, her obviously in some form of distress, Aaron being unable to help because he didn't know what the cause of it was.

"I… I'm sorry, Love. Something… something happened and…" Yuri paused to breathe, her mind needing to take a moment to figure out how to explain what was happening to Aaron.

She didn't want to tell him that she murdered Natsuki's father. Didn't want him to know that his sweet, innocent, passive girlfriend had somebody's blood on her hands. Didn't want him to suddenly grow fearful of her because of what she did.

She… she knew Aaron was understanding and if she did tell him, after some quick explaining, he'd understand that Yuri had no choice. It was her life verses someone else's. But… That was a conversation she wasn't even ready to have with herself, let alone with her boyfriend. For now it was… it was just better if he didn't know. It was better if Yuri didn't remind herself. Better if she didn't recall the events. Better to just… bury the memory away deep within her mind.

It wasn't because she thought Aaron couldn't handle hearing it. It was because Yuri couldn't handle telling it. Admitting it. Couldn't even handle thinking about it.

"Well? You gonna tell me or what?" Aaron asked, growing impatient as Yuri made him wait. "Is this about… Natsuki's father?" He assumed. "You… you know what he does to her, right?"

"Ye-yes" Yuri finally spoke. "They had a… falling out. A very, very bad one" She stated vaguely. "Sufficed to say, Natsuki needs a place to stay for a few days. A week or so"

"What?!"

"It's only temporary! I swear! I would actually prefer if she came to live with me! It's just… I need a few days to talk about it with my sisters. Make arrangements and see if they'd agree to take her in. Were it my choice, we wouldn't even be here! But… it's not my choice" Yuri stated with a sigh. "Please? Love, I really need your help right now. So much has happened! So much chaos and… oh god, my head hurts. Ow… It's spiraling out of control!" She grunted in pain as she felt a headache come on, the confrontational glare on Aaron's face removed as he saw his girlfriend in pain, him moving to her side to comfort her.

"Hey. Hey, it's alright. I'm sorry for shouting just then. It was just a little shocking, that's all" Aaron stated, his hand gently rubbing Yuri's shoulder, him trying his best to comfort her. "I'm okay with keeping her around for a week or two. But I need to know more, Yuri. Come on. Sit down on the couch and tell me what happened"

"No! I… I need to go home and rest" Yuri rejected, gently pushing Aaron's hand off her shoulder. "I'm sorry, Love. I'm very, very sorry. I just… I'm overwhelmed. Please, I need to go. Just… just let me go" She pleaded, looking deeply into Aaron's eyes, begging him to just let her leave, him sighing as he stepped back from her.

"Fine" He said, hurt obvious in his voice. "Just… go" He sighed.

"I really am sorry. I want to tell you. I want to tell you everything. Really, I do. But… it's too much right now. Too much for me. Too much for Natsuki. Now is… now is not the time"

"Whatever" Aaron huffed quietly before walking away, Yuri following him quietly, the both of them exiting the kitchen and returning to the living room, only to see that Natsuki hadn't moved an inch the entire time they were talking. She just stared at the floor in front of her, looking lost in her own thoughts, her not even reacting to Aaron and Yuri's return.

"Natsuki?" Yuri asked as she approached slowly.

"Yeah?" She answered quietly, her seemingly not in any sort of trance. She was just being… very still.

"Aaron's allowed you to stay here for a few days while I talk with my family" Yuri stated. "Isn't that nice of him?" She asked.

"Thanks" Was all Natsuki said, her head sinking lower as she sulked, Aaron's head recoiling at that, not liking how Natsuki sounded when she 'thanked' him.

It wasn't like he was fishing for praise or anything by allowing her to stay with him. But at the very least, she could have said more than thanks. Maybe said it with little more… gratitude, he guessed. After all, he was opening his home to her. Temporary or not, not a lot of people tend to do that, especially people who don't even know the reason as to why.

"No problem" Aaron stated, a blank, unreadable look on his face, him glancing at Yuri, only to see her head sink down slightly, as if in shame. "I'm cool with it. You can stay for as long as you need to. What's mine is yours and all that" He said before sighing.

"It's not forever, Natsuki. I just need time to talk to my family about this. Then you can come live with me. We can… we can be like sisters. Would you like that?" Yuri asked, Natsuki glancing at her for a second before looking away.

"I dunno…" She sighed as well. "I guess I don't really have a choice" She said.

"Right… Well, I better get going. I-I really need to rest" Yuri stated, her head turning to look at Aaron, him looking back at her with the same blank look as before. "Thank you, Love. Thank you for taking Natsuki in for the time being. I really am sorry this is so sudden, but a lot's happened and… I don't know exactly what to do"

"It's okay" Aaron stated, his tone deadpanned.

"Regardless. Thank you again, Love. Now… Goodbye" Yuri said as she walked towards the door, Aaron suddenly following her, his hand moving to cover the doorknob before Yuri even had a chance to reach for it, Her looking up into Aaron's eyes.

"Can I at least have a kiss goodbye?" He asked politely, a small frown on his face. "We didn't talk at all today. I… I barely got to see you. The least you can do is give me this" He stated, a small, genuine smile coming to Yuri's face as she grabbed Aaron gently by the cheek, a small blush on her cheeks.

"Yes. Yes, of course you can have a kiss goodbye" She said as she pulled him close, the two sharing a small yet sweet kiss before pulling away from each other. "Goodbye. I love you"

"I love you too" Aaron said as he moved away from the door, allowing Yuri to open it and walk out, Aaron sighing as he watched her leave, shutting the door on the way out, Aaron now left alone with Natsuki, him looking over his shoulder to see her still sitting on the couch, not moving or interacting with anything. Just… sitting there. Zoned out. "You okay over there?" He asked as he took a seat on the opposite side of the couch, Natsuki turning her head to look at him, Aaron able to see the odd and concerning expression on her face

It was… difficult to explain, but it looked like she was scared, confused, exhausted, resentful, angry and somewhat guilt ridden, all of these expressions showing themselves to Aaron at the same time, creating this odd look. This mish-mash of emotions and feelings, Aaron struggling to understand how Natsuki came to have this look. Struggled to even think of why she looked the way she did.

"Ye-Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. Just… a little shaken up. A lot's happened" Natsuki stated quietly, her finally speaking after a moment of just staring at Aaron, as if she were trying to read the expression on his face like he was trying to read hers.

Aaron did his best to keep himself blank, obviously. Try not to let the way he was feeling show too much. If he did… it'd be insensitive and rude to whatever Natsuki was going through. Might paint a bad picture for his relationship with Yuri too, at least in Natsuki's eyes.

Aaron was… Well, he felt a bit hurt, honestly. He took heavy issue with Yuri keeping him in the dark about whatever was going on, to the point where thinking about it, speculating about it, unnerved him. It made him feel… it made him feel like Yuri didn't trust him. And to somebody who was romantically involved with someone, thinking that your significant other sees you as untrustworthy is very damaging. Very hurtful, Aaron absolutely dumbfounded as to why Yuri would ever think him distrustful.

Granted, their relationship wasn't exactly old enough for that sort of thing. It was like, what? Five days ago that they started dating? Trust issues were bound to arise sooner or later but… Aaron and her went through a lot in those five or so days. Went through more than your average couple, that was for sure.

After all, how many boyfriends have to comfort their girlfriends after they've suffered an attack by what they thought were close friends? Okay, maybe a few. But how many of them also had to discover that their girlfriend was a self-harming masochist who practically got off to…

You know what… never mind. Hurt as he may have been, it was wrong of Aaron to even think of applying those words to Yuri. His girlfriend. His love. His first love actually. In public or even in the safety of his own mind, branding Yuri with such words like that was wrong. He knew that.

Whatever was going on with them, Aaron and her would have to just work it out the old fashioned way. Like they did during the night after the festival. And… if Aaron was lucky… maybe everything would go along exactly like it did the night after the festival.

A small grin grew on his face when he thought about that. Yeah. It'd be nice to do that with her again. To be with her again, Aaron being more… prepared this time.

Regardless, all of these thoughts were getting him off track.

"Like what?" Aaron asked, responding to Natsuki's statement about what had happened, her simply saying 'A lot', Aaron hoping that, with a little pressure, Natsuki would be more forthcoming with the details of the event than Yuri was. At least then, he could get a grasp on the situation. At least then, he could understand what was going on and why Yuri and Natsuki were acting so strange.

Keep in mind that he wasn't digging for drama to gossip about like a schoolgirl. He just wanted to know what was happening so he can have an idea of how he can help.

"How… How much did Yuri tell you?" Natsuki asked.

"Next to nothing" Aaron responded calmly, trying to keep the atmosphere as comfortable as possible for Natsuki. While he was technically trying to pump her for information, that didn't mean he needed to be hostile or forceful in order to get it. "All I know is that you had some sort of fallout with your dad" He stated, seeing Natsuki tense up at the mention of her father, that worrying Aaron slightly, it made clear that even talking about him would unnerve Natsuki greatly. He sighed at that. "I um… I dunno what happened. And maybe you probably don't wanna tell me. That's… that's okay, I guess. I don't want to pressure you into feeling like you have to confess everything to me, but I would like to help you with whatever's the problem. Only… I can't do that if I don't even know what the problem is" He stated, Natsuki sighing as she hung her head down low, a guilt ridden look on her face, her still clutching her legs to her chest.

"I know that… and I'm sorry. Sorry that you're not being told what's going on. Sorry that Yuri just came in here and threw me on you. Sorry that we're acting like complete and total bitches. It's just… so much has happened and… it's honestly really scary" Natsuki stated as she looked up at Aaron, him able to see genuine fear in her eyes. "It's not that we don't want you to know. It's just… so much has happened. I think we're both just really overwhelmed and… really tired"

"Why? What happened? Did you… get into a fight with him?" Aaron asked, just throwing out assumptions at this point.

"Yeah. Yeah, I did" Natsuki sighed as she pulled back the bang covering her eye, moving it behind her ear and looking straight at Aaron, his eyes widening in shock when he saw her face. When he saw the big, swollen, blueish-black eye.

"Oh my god…" Aaron said. "Are you…"

"I'm fine. I've dealt with worst. This… this isn't my first one" Natsuki sighed again, turning her head away as she looked down at her knees. "I don't know why he did it. I swear, I didn't even do anything! Didn't even look at him! Didn't say anything! But he just… lashed out at me. Just jumped me and… gave me this" She said as she pointed to the black eye. "Sometimes I think he just enjoyed hurting me. Maybe it made him feel powerful. Maybe it made him feel in control or something. Like… out of all the things that went wrong in his life, this was the one thing he had control over. Me. Just… not in the right way"

"What's the right way?" Aaron asked cautiously, yet still somewhat confused as to what Natsuki meant. The right way of controlling someone? Like… is there even a right way for that?

"You know… like… mutually, I guess. Like… normal kids do what their parents tell them to do because they love and respect them. They're being controlled by their parents, but the kids know that. And because they love and respect their moms and dads so much, they're okay with it. They're only doing it because they know what's best for us. But… my dad didn't work like that"

"He used fear to control you" Aaron stated, understanding where she was coming from now.

"Yeah. His life is… was… a shambling ruin. Everything just went from bad to worst for him, but at least he kept his daughter in line" Natsuki sighed again. "I dunno. I don't know how he thought. I don't think like he did, so… he could have had a completely different reason for why he hurt me. Doesn't matter anymore"

"I'm sorry, Natsuki" Aaron apologized. "I… I know it's not easy on you, but I'd still like to know what happened. What really happened" He pressed on as politely as he could without sounding demanding or insensitive.

"Yeah yeah. I'm getting to that part" Natsuki said, huffing slightly. "Yuri paid me a visit. She didn't tell me she was going to, by the way. Just walked right up to the house and knocked on the door. She… she saw what he did to me. The way she confronted dad really shocked me. I thought she was supposed to be scared and timid, but the way she puffed out her chest and stood her ground… she looked like a warrior getting ready to charge at the enemy" She stated, chuckling lightly. "I always knew she was a faker. She just does that whole wallflower act to look cute"

"Well if you ask me, I think she was just trying to be like you" Aaron asked, Natsuki looking at Aaron in confusion.

"The hell are you talking about?" She asked.

"Well, you puff your chest out whenever you get confrontational. You tend to act like a warrior charging at the enemy. Like… remember when Yuri got pushed by that girl during the festival? You puffed out your chest, straightened your back and just let that bitch have it. You were merciless. Maybe Yuri was just trying to act like you did" Aaron stated, seeing a small smile come to Natsuki's face, only for it to disappear as quickly as it came, Natsuki remembering what came after Yuri confronted her father.

"Yeah, well for how brave she acted, it only made things worst" She stated as her head sank down again. "She… she threatened to take me away from him. Told him to just hand me over and I'd be out of his hair forever. Then… I dunno. He just snapped. Charged at her and…"

"And what?" Aaron asked, his back rising up and straightening after hearing that, a nervous look on his face.

"He… he put his hands on her neck. He tried to choke her!"

"She didn't get hurt, did she?! She's not hurt, right?!" Aaron asked in concern.

"No. No, she's fine. Better than dad, that's for sure. She… she ki… I mean… she grabbed a vase and hit him on the head!" Natsuki said, stopping herself before she said to much, now opting to craft a lie. "Yeah! She bonked him so hard, his fat ass hit the floor! Got knocked unconscious! Then I packed a bag and we ran here! Yeah! I… I ran away! I ran away and I'm never going back!" Natsuki said as she stood up from the couch, a pout on her face as she put her hands on her hips.

"Wa-Wait… That's it? You just ran away? Didn't bother calling the police? If he gave you a black eye, that's child abuse! If he put his hands on Yuri, that's assault! Those are crimes! He needs to be arrested!" Aaron stated as he stood up from the couch as well, slightly outraged that neither Natsuki or Yuri thought of calling the authorities in order to lock away this complete and utter madman. This deranged freak who had nothing better to do than beat up young women!

"N-no!" Natsuki shouted, jumping back slightly in shock, Aaron looking at her oddly for that. "I-I mean… what would that do? Best case scenario, he'd get thrown in a cell for a week! A month if we were lucky! And I'd… I'd probably be thrown into foster care. Be made an orphan or… maybe would have ended up living on my own. And I… I don't want that. I don't like being alone" Natsuki said, her tone growing more somber at the thought of being on her own. "So just… just let him rot all alone. See if I care! Because I don't!" She huffed again as she sat back down on the couch, a grin on her face as she crossed her arms.

"Natsuki…"

"Look Aaron, I'm grateful for the room and board. Or… couch and board, I guess. But I don't wanna talk about it anymore! I just wanna… I just want a chance to sit down and sort myself out. Okay?" Natsuki sighed. "I… I get that you're just trying to make me feel better, but I really don't wanna talk anymore. I'm sorry"

"It's alright. I understand" Aaron sighed as well. "I'll be in the back room. If you need anything, you let me know" He said as he walked away, giving Natsuki a moment to herself. A moment to sort herself out, as she put it.

He sighed again as he took a second look at her before leaving the room, him gazing over his shoulder to see her move into a laying position, a slightly angered and fed up look on her face as she gazed up at the ceiling. Aaron felt sorry for her. Really, he did.

While he knew he'd be scolded by her if she knew he felt that way, he couldn't exactly help it. I mean, yeah, Natsuki's annoying, bossy, demanding and even downright mean at times, but did that mean she deserved all of that? Did that mean she deserved having to live with an abusive father? Did that mean she deserved to have her mother walk out on her? Did that mean she deserved to be looked upon by her family and branded as an accident?

Aaron didn't think so. Aaron didn't think she deserved any of that. But… life's unfair that way. It's cold. It's cruel. It's hard… and it plays favorites more times than it should. It was only natural for Aaron to feel pi… to feel sympathy for her.

He wondered if there was a way to cheer her up somehow. A way to get rid of that angered, stressed out look on her face. Away to make her smile, if only for a minute.

An idea then suddenly came into his head, a grin coming on as well as he pulled out his cellphone and dialed a number, making a call. After his call was finished, he then walked up into his room and opened his closet door, rooting around until he found what he was looking for, a large box he kept in the very back of his closet. A sort of… treasure trove, if you will. This large box carrying many relics from Aaron's past, him searching it for one in particular.

As he searched through the box, the sound of a doorbell echoed from downstairs, Aaron surprised at how fast they arrived. He only placed the order a few minutes ago.

"Aaron! Door!" Natsuki shouted from downstairs.

"Yeah. Can you get it for me? Don't worry. It's already been paid for"

"Already been paid for? You bought something?" Natsuki asked as she walked up to the door, her making sure to cover her black eye with her hair before answering it though.

"Pizza delivery!" The delivery boy exclaimed as Natsuki opened the door, her shocked to see him carrying not one but three full pies! All of them in their own boxes! The fresh smell of them causing Natsuki's stomach to growl hungrily. How… how long had it even been since she had pizza? God, not since she was a little girl. "I got three of 'em here for an Aaron" The delivery boy stated.

"Ye-yeah. Yeah, give 'em here" Natsuki said as she took the boxes. "And these have been paid for already, right?"

"Yep. Well, have a good night!" The boy said as he walked away, Natsuki closing the door with her foot before walking back into the living room, carrying the pies with both hands, setting them down on the coffee table.

"Alright. You got them!" Aaron stated happily as he came into the living room, carrying with him something as well, Natsuki looking at him in surprise when she saw it. An old video game console. Small, square in shape. Colored purple with a carrying handle on the back, a large jumble of wires alongside it. As well as two controllers.

"What's all this?" Natsuki asked as she looked at the console.

"Oh, this? Just an old game me and Sayori used to play when we were kids. I figured it could help you cheer up. I know video games always helped me. The pizza's just because I'm hungry but… I can't cook. Anything. You can have as much as you like, by the way. I ordered enough for both of us" Aaron said as he walked past Natsuki, moving towards the living room television in order to set up his console.

"Three whole pizzas?" Natsuki asked.

"Yeah. I figured you were gonna be pretty hungry. Go on. Dig in. I'll set this up and you and me can play whatever you want. It'll be fun. I promise"

---

"You've been in there for quite a while. I'm starting to get worried. Are you feeling alright, Sister? Do you think you need to pay a visit to a hospital?"

"No! No, I'm fine. I'm just… my stomach's just not feeling very well right now! It must be something I ate at school! I-I'll be okay!" Yuri shouted from the other side of the bathroom door, trying to assure her older sister that she was fine. "It's just a stomach ache. That's all" She stated, her trying her best to hold back the bile as it forced itself up her throat, Yuri trying as hard as possible to just force it back down. To prevent it from coming up, her head dangling over the toilet bowl the entire time.

"Do you think you'll feel well enough for dinner?" Her sister, Yuna, asked, the response she received being the very audible sound of Yuri vomiting into the toilet. "I'll take that as a no. Are you sure you don't want to go to a hospi-"

"Yuna! Please!" Yuri cut her off. "Just… just leave me be!" She shouted from the other side of the door again, her older sister sighing as she shook her head, a saddened and concerned look on her face.

"Okay. If you need anything, you let me know right away" She said before walking away from the door, doing as her younger sister commanded and leaving her be, Yuri gasping as she felt another urge to vomit coming on, her unable to hold it back as she knelt in front of the toilet, vomiting into it for what she counted as the fourth time.

"Oh dear god, please stop!" She begged as she breathed in and out heavily, tiredly, her unable to hold down practically anything in her body, it forcing itself to immediately upchuck and vomit whatever it had sitting around in its digestive system.

It was… It was her body reacting to… the corpse. The body of Natsuki's father, Yuri unable to get the sight of it out of her head. Unable to prevent her mind from replaying the moment over and over again, her looking back on that memory in utter disgust, the bile rising in her throat time and time again as the memory constantly played over and over in her mind, like it was stuck on an infinite loop, Yuri unable to will this memory away no matter how hard she tried.

She tried to think about something else. About anything else. Tried to think about books. School. Her studies. Aaron. Natsuki. Sayori. Anything! Anything at all! But it… he… just kept coming back and back. Just kept forcing that memory back in her mind, almost as if Yuri were being haunted by the man's vengeful spirit, it constantly reminding her that she was guilty of committing the ultimate crime. It constantly reminding her that she was a murderer.

"No! Not again!" She practically cried before another vomit came on, this one actually causing Yuri pain, her gasping for breath as she leaned against the toilet bowl, her so tired and worn out that she barely had the energy to hold herself up. Barely had the energy to support her own weight. "Please… please, no more! Enough! I can't take it!" She pleaded, begging her body to stop reacting this way. Begging her mind to stop replaying this horrible memory over and over again. Begging it to let her forget. Begging it to give her the chance to wash away the heavy guilt she felt weigh her down.

She… she knew she had no choice. She knew he was going to kill her. She was going to be choked to death! Literally anyone else in her situation would have done the same! Thought the same! Acted the same! So why? Why does she still feel this gnawing, crippling, burdening guilt inside her?! Why does it still weight her down?! Why is she still gripped with shock and fatigue?! Why does the guilt make her feel like a colony of parasites are eating their way out of her stomach?! All because she tried to defend herself?! To defend her own life?!

Or… was there another way? Was there another, safer way? A way to prevent the death of Natsuki's father? A way to rid Natsuki of that horrible man without taking his life in the process?

Was such a way possible? She honestly wished she could have found out. But… her body, her instincts, chose the short and quick answer to the problem she faced, rather than working to see if there was an alternative. Maybe there wasn't. But… that still didn't give Yuri the justification she needed to live down what she'd done. Her morality when it came to things like this… it was sadly too cut and dry. Too defined and specified. Too straight and narrow. Not flexible in the slightest.

To her, it didn't matter whether it was self defense or not. Didn't matter if it was conscious thought or pure instinct that ruled her in that moment. Murder was murder. A life was a life. A human is a human, regardless of how horrid they may have acted in said life.

Who was Yuri to decide who lived and died? Who gave her the right to make this judgment? Who let her make this call? Who gave her the power to take someone else's life away from them, all while she went on continuing to live her own? Nobody. Nobody told her that she could do this. Nobody allowed her to break one of if not the most important law of society. Nobody gave her permission to commit such an awful sin!

A sin that… A sin that she needed to repent.

"Wh-What?" She gasped in shock as that thought came to her mind, her not feeling as if it were actually her own. It felt… artificial. Like a… fake thought? Something that was forced into her mind. Something her brain was forced to process.

Repent? What… what did it mean by repent? Repent in what way?! How… how could a filthy murderer like her ever repent such a horrible sin? And even then, what good would repentance do for her? It wouldn't wipe the slate clean. Wouldn't wash Yuri of all her filth. Wouldn't bring that dead man back to life. No… All she'd end up doing would be reaffirming her guilt. She'd only end up making it worst on herself.

The best course of action was to obviously try to move on from this. Move on and forget about it. Distract herself from it. Try to find some way to forget about how she ripped a poor old man away from his daughter, stood over him and watched as he took his final breath, only to end up having his corpse thrown down into a dark, dank old basement. Left to rot and decay. Not even given the decency of a proper burial. Proper cremation. Eulogy. Just left as food for the rats. Forgotten.

What… what was Yuri supposed to do?! She never wanted to kill him! Never even wanted to fight with him! It just… it just happened! Yuri couldn't have stopped it. Couldn't have controlled it. If she could, this wouldn't be happening.

You're right. There was nothing that could have been done. But that doesn't mean you can just ignore the fact that you murdered someone. That you took away their life. That you robbed them of theirs while you live on in yours. Happily, I may add.

"I… I…"

The arrogance of it. The way you're just trying to dismiss someone's life! The way you're trying to just go about your day! How you're trying to forget your crime! It's disgusting. Disgusting how you feel such little empathy. Such little sympathy or sorrow for others. Abusive or not, you killed a father and abducted a young girl! Dumped her off at your boyfriend's house too!

"A-Aaron…"

That poor boy. My poor Aaron… I love how you just kept him in the dark about everything. How you just ignored the concern he showed for you. How you ignored the attention he gave you! A boyfriend is supposed to be there to comfort you when you need it. To love you when you need to be loved. To be there for you. And more importantly, you're supposed to let him do this. You're supposed to show him that you see the effort he puts in. You're supposed to be happy that he cares.

You're supposed to share this care and concern with him… but all you did was just push him away. Push him away from you and dump some whiny, annoying teenager on him. All without even an answer as to why.

"No. No, that's not… I couldn't! He'd… he'd…"

He'd call you a murderer? Why wouldn't he? That's what you are! That's all you'll ever be now! That is… until you repent. And you know exactly how to do that. How to cleanse yourself. How to rid yourself of the filthy sin you've committed.

"No… No, please! I… I can't! I don't want to!" Yuri shouted in fear as she turned her head, only to see her reflection in the bathroom mirror staring back, her able to see the look of pure terror on her face.

You know what you must do.

"Please! Please, don't make me do this! I can't! I won't!"

"Yuri? Are you okay in there? Is something wrong? Why are you shouting?" Yuna asked in concern from the other side of the door, Yuri beginning to sweat nervously as she felt a rush of anxiety, her heart beginning to race. So much so, that you could hear the beating, it getting faster and faster as Yuri's anxiety built up, her now breathing rapidly and unevenly, on the verge of hyperventilation, her clutching her chest tightly, gripping the flesh covering her heart, so much so that her manicured nails began digging into her skin as she felt her heart beat so fast and hard, as if it were trying to burst out of her chest.

Oh no! Someone's getting nervous! You look like you're on the verge of a panic attack! You should deal with that before someone sees you acting like this. What was that old trick you used to do? The one you'd sneak away from everyone for when you got all nervous and anxious. The one that always seemed to calm you down.

"I… No! No, damn you!" Yuri shouted loudly as she gripped her wrist deathly tight, trying to restrain it from touching anything. Trying to keep it under control. "I won't let you do this to me! I'm stronger than you! I'm done with that! Never! Never again!" She yelled, trying as hard as possible to fight against her baser urges, the struggle getting more and more difficult.

"Yuri?!" Yuna cried out. "What's going on in there?! Why are you screaming?! Open this door right now!"

Oh come on. What's the harm in it? The only person you're hurting is yourself. And you want that anyway. It feels good. It calms you down. Mellows you out. It's nice. There's no harm in just one. Little. Cut.

"There's… T̷̺̭̊̚h̸̩̊͝ẻ̷̬̈́r̵̹͐ẻ̷̖͋'̶̼̯͒̚s̵̤̤̈́ ̸̤̃n̴̗͇͠o̷̘̲͊͝ ̴̜̦̅̇h̶̺͌a̸̮͂̂r̷̭̾m̸̹͑͝ ̶̪̮̐͂i̶̜̅ǹ̶̨ ̴͚͔̃j̷̰̣͒̀u̴̝̩̎s̸̫̅̕ṯ̷́̆.̶͎͌.̷̖̩̔.̸͈̳͌̍ ̴̛͈ọ̴̺̚ṇ̴̠͊e̸̯̖̕ ̸̳̈́l̵̛͚͆ì̷̝t̶̯̮͂̈́t̷͙̯̀͆l̶̅̂͜ẹ̸̞̀̄ ̸̱̩̏͒c̸͙͌̊ǘ̷̮͕͝t̸̻͉͑̕" Yuri said, her voice lowering in volume, monotone as she looked at herself in the mirror, seeing the look of pure terror and fear on her face, her suddenly powerless to control herself, feeling like a spectator in her own body. A prisoner with no control of her actions as she watched her shaking hand slowly clench into a fist, only to see it punch the mirror as hard as possible, watching it shatter and crack as her fist made contact, Yuri mindlessly pulling out one of the jagged shards of the mirror, an utterly terrified look on her face as she gripped it in her hand. Gripped it so tightly that her palm started bleeding, cut by the edges of the jagged glass.

Do it

Yuri began crying as she forced her eyes closed, feeling the fabric of her sleeve run up her forearm before…

"Please no…" She begged herself meekly, only to start screaming at the top of her lungs as the large shard of glass was rammed into her arm, blood gushing out immediately as Yuri struggled to handle the pain. The intense pain as she made this large gash. This laceration in her body.

"Yuri?!" Yuna began pounding against the bathroom door.

Do it again.

She screamed louder as she gripped the shard tighter, running it slowly, painfully, all the way down from her wrist to her elbow, the bandages Aaron had placed from before now falling off her arm, unraveling strip by strip, the glass having cut right through it.

"YURI?!"

AGAIN! MORE! SCREAM, WHORE! SCREAM!

Yuri screamed in pure agony as she began forcefully pulling the shard out and ramming it back into her arm multiple times, her blood spurting out from the long laceration as she just kept stabbing over and over uncontrollably. Just kept going and going, regardless of how excruciating the pain was for her.

"YURI! OPEN THIS DOOR NOW OR I'LL BREAK IT DOWN!" Her older sister shouted at the top of her lungs, her preparing to ram herself into the bathroom door in order to open it, her trying and failing multiple times, only to eventually succeed, the door swinging open as Yuna burst in, only to gasp in fear and shock when she saw Yuri stabbing herself mercilessly with the jagged shard of glass from the bathroom mirror, her face and the bathroom floor specked in blood. "Yuri?! What are you doing?! Trying to kill yourself?! Stop! STOP!" Yuna shouted as loud as possible as she grabbed Yuri by the wrist, trying to stop her younger sister from stabbing herself so violently.

"LEAVE ME ALONE! GO AWAY! LEAVE ME BE!" Yuri screamed at the top of her lungs as she struggled to break free.

"No! You need to stop!" Yuna shouted as she tried to force the shard out of Yuri's hand. "I. SAID. STOP!" She yelled as she smacked Yuri across the face with the back of her hand, Yuri yelping in pain as a red mark formed on her cheek, Yuna now able to seize the glass shard, throwing it away in the trash can. "What the hell is wrong with you?!" She shouted loudly at Yuri, seeing the odd, dazed and confused look on the girl's face, Yuri looking as if she just suffered a nightmare, only to wake up in an unfamiliar place. "Look at me! Look at me now!" Yuna commanded as she grabbed Yuri by the shoulders, shaking her forcefully.

"I… I can… I was… I…" Yuri stammered, unable to form a proper sentence as Yuna glared at her, her eyes stone cold, angered and enraged at her sister's actions.

"You were stabbing yourself. Why?! Why would you do that?! Are you suicidal or something?! Why would you do that to yourself?!"

"I… I…" Yuri chocked on her words, unable to even speak now as tears began forming under her eyes.

"Answer me, goddammit!"

"I'm sorry!" Yuri cried as she pulled herself into her older sister, crying into her shirt as she placed her head above Yuna's chest. "I'm so sorry! I just… I'm disgusting, I know! I'm a freak! A self harming, masochistic freak! I tried to stop it, Yuna! I tried to get better! I really did! But I can't! I can't because this is who I am! I'm stuck like this forever!" She began weeping, her older sister looking down on her, a saddened frown on her face as she sighed, wrapping her arms around her younger sister and beginning to gently stroke her back.

"Oh, sweetie… No, you're not stuck like this. No, this is not who you are. No, you're not disgusting and no, you're not a freak" Yuna said, trying to comfort her younger sister. "Yuri, how long have you been doing this? Hurting yourself"

"For as long as I can remember. I don't… I don't even remember the reason. I do it just because. Just because I'm some freak!"

"No, Yuri. No, you're not" Yuna said softly as she gently pulled her sister away, holding her head by the chin with one hand, picking it up while the other gently wiped away a tear. "You're not a freak. You're just… sick. That's all. Your head. Your mind, it's… not feeling well" Yuna stated, trying to be as polite in her statement as possible, Yuri only responding by sniffing slightly. "These things happen, okay? Happen to a lot of people. There are many, many other people who go through the same thing. Have the same sickness. But there's a way to cure it. To make it better. There are doctors. People we can go to. People who can fix you. Make you well again"

"No!" Yuri rejected immediately, pushing herself away from her sister. "Don't do that to me. Don't! Please!" She begged pathetically. "I won't do it! I won't have some hack psychologist poke and prod at my brain like a damned science experiment! I won't sit there and let some complete stranger force words and ideas into my head!"

"Yuri, don't you want to get better?" Yuna asked, her frown still persisting. "If it really has been going on for so long… this needs to stop. I won't let you hurt yourself like this for no reason! You could have killed yourself if I didn't break down that door! Is that what you want?! For me to find you dead in the bathroom?! For your baby sister to find you dead?!"

"Did somebody call me?" Yuki asked as she poked her head through the door frame.

"No!" Yuna stated as she crossed her arms. "Go to your room right now, Yuki. And don't come out until I say so" She commanded, Yuki looking at her in slight shock, the little girl thinking she was being punished.

"Why? Did I do something wrong?"

"No, sweetheart. You didn't do anything wrong. It's… it's your sister. Just… stay in your room, okay?" She asked politely, Yuki sighing as she walked away, returning to her bedroom. "As for you…" Yuna glared as she turned to face Yuri, walking past her and towards the broken mirror above the bathroom sink, opening the medicine cabinet to pull out a first aid kit. "Come on. Let's get that sterilized and wrapped up before it gets infected. I'll clean up your mess later" She said as she walked out of the bathroom, Yuri slowly following her into the living room, taking a seat on the couch as Yuna prepared to clean Yuri's wound.

It was nothing like how Aaron did it. Nothing like how he did it at all, Yuri's older sister being much more… rough than he would have been. Where Aaron was thorough, meticulous and gentle, Yuna was sloppy, rushed and rather hard, the bandages being much tighter than Yuri would have liked.

Though she wasn't one hundred percent satisfied with the care her older sister provided, she tried her best not to hold it against her. After all… walking in on that. On her younger sister violently stabbing her arm multiple times… it no doubt had an effect on Yuna. Threw her on edge. Scared her even, her thinking that Yuri would have probably killed herself, were her sister not there to stop her.

That may have very well been the case too.

God, just thinking about it sent chills down Yuri's spine, the thought of her killing herself like that. Ramming glass into her arm over and over until she bled out. The thought of it alone sent her head into a spin, especially when she struggled to find out why.

Why had she been so suddenly overpowered by the urge to cut into herself again? Why did she allow it to go that far? Why did she not stop, even as her sister was pounding the door in?

It… It almost felt as if Yuri wasn't actually the one doing those things though. In that moment… her mind was not her own. It was not under her control. She was not in power of it. Not in command of her faculties. Of her body. Hell, her very own thoughts. The voices inside her head didn't even sound like hers. It sounded like they were… something else. Someone else.

It felt like in that very moment, Yuri was no better than a puppet on strings, putting on a ghastly and disturbing show for some sick, sadistic audience that stood on the edge of their seats, begging for more of this… disgusting display. Begging to see more suffering. To see more pain befall Yuri. And her, feeling like a captive in her own body, had no choice but to obey the sick audience watch her horrid display. To give them what they wanted.

It felt so overwhelming. The idea of her suddenly losing control of herself. Granted, she's lost control before, if you remember from a certain late night… but it's never been this bad.

She sighed as she hung her head low in shame. Aaron… She… she failed him. He gave her a task. A mission. A command. And she disobeyed.

He just… he just wanted her to stop. To stop hurting herself for her… sick fetish. Wanted her to stop being in pain. That was all he wanted. That was all he asked for from her in exchange for his love and care. But… she didn't give him that. She didn't give him what he wanted. He wanted results. Improvements. But now, All Yuri's done is take their progress, all the work they'd been doing on getting her well, and tossed it out the window, her now back where she started, only difference being that it is much more severe and now, life threatening.

The thought of that… dying by the hands of herself. By cutting herself. It scared her greatly. You'd think that to be a good thing, right? You'd think the fear would keep her away. Keep her from doing it again. Keep her in line.

But we all know that's not going to be the case. Never is.

"You aren't saying anything" Yuna stated as she sat beside Yuri.

"What do you expect me to say?" She asked, her older sister opening her mouth to speak, only to end up shutting it, Yuna unable to think of anything to say as the two sisters stared each other down, Yuna eventually standing up from the couch, breaking eye contact from Yuri as she turned her back to her younger sister.

"We'll talk about this tomorrow. When… when everyone's calmed down" She sighed again. "I know… I know you didn't mean to do it. It's some… weird urge for you, isn't it? Some base craving you've allowed yourself to obsess over"

"Yuna… Sister…"

"I won't have it. Not here. Not in my home. Not in front of me and not in front of your baby sister" Yuna stated firmly, enforcing her authority as the oldest of the family and owner of their home. "More importantly, I won't allow you to do this to yourself. To do this to your body. It stops now, Yuri. And we're going to make it stop. I'm going to schedule an appointment for you tomorrow, after school. A doctor. A psychologist. Psychiatrist. A shrink. Whatever you need to see in order to get better!"

"I… I can't…"

"I'm not giving you a choice!" Yuna stated, raising her voice slightly in anger, Yuri taken aback by that slightly, knowing how rare it is that Yuna shouts. This must have really upset her. "You could have died. Killed yourself on accident… or on purpose. I don't know yet. I just… I'm scared now, Yuri. Scared that something like that may actually happen"

"I-it won't! I'm… I'm in control! I swear! I just… something made me lose my nerv-"

"I've already lost my mother and father. Don't let me lose one of my sisters too. You. Yuki. You're all I have left"

"I'm… I'm sorry" Yuri apologized meekly, a small frown on her face as she hung her head low in sadness, the thought of her mother and father entering Yuri's mind, triggering flashbacks of the past. The times when she and Yuna were just little girls. Carefree and happy with both of their parents by their sides. But now… now not so much. Now they're all worried. Stressed. Burdened… and alone, having only each other for any real comfort.

A low blow, really. Mentioning their dead parents. Bringing them into this, Yuna using them to win the argument. To silence Yuri. To make her do as her older sister commanded. Maybe it wasn't Yuna's intention… but that didn't mean it didn't have that effect.

"Go to bed" The older sister commanded, Yuri sighing as she turned around and began walking down the hall, towards her bedroom.

"Goodnight" Yuri said quietly before reaching the door, entering her room and preparing for bed. She skipped out on brushing her teeth and fixing her hair, due to the bathroom still being… messy. Not to mention the now broken mirror would make it hard to do her nightly routine. So, she instead just stripped to her underwear, a simple, matching purple bra and panties, and went to bed, her covering herself in her blankets as she laid her head on her pillow, trying to fall asleep.

She tried for what felt like hours. Tossed and turned like crazy. Changed sleeping positions constantly, much to the dismay of her back, Yuri grunting and groaning in annoyance as she failed to fall asleep. It was all that… adrenaline from before. It was still in her system, on top of the shock and anxiety.

She eventually huffed as she gave up, her arms angrily falling to her sides, a glare on her face as she stared at the ceiling above. Gazed at it intently as her mind tried to think of ways to help her fall asleep.

Her glare faded as her eyebrows slowly rose, an idea coming to her. But… it wasn't one that she would normally try, were she not desperate to put this night behind her, Yuri sighing as she grabbed her cellphone from her nightstand and dialed a number.

She knew this was a bad time to be making phone calls, Yuri most likely waking up the person on the other line. Still though, she was desperate.

"Hello?" Aaron answered with a yawn, exhaustion in his voice.

"Hello, Love" Yuri said softly, the sound of Aaron's voice through the phone calming her slightly. Put her at ease. "Did I wake you?" She asked.

"No. You were about to, though. I was just about to go to bed. So what's up? What's with the late night call?"

"Nothing. Nothing really. I just… wanted to check up on you. Make sure you were okay. Is um… Is Natsuki there? Is she alright?" Yuri asked, concern in her voice.

"Yeah. She's fine. I fixed her a spot on the couch. Cheered her up from whatever was bothering her too. We ordered pizza and played video games all night" Aaron stated, Yuri smiling slightly as she heard that, happy to know Natsuki was alright.

"Sounds like you both had fun. I'm glad"

"Yeah. It was pretty fun. You should have stayed with us. Hung out, you know?"

"I should have. I'm… I'm sorry, Love. I just wasn't feeling good. Wasn't feeling good at all. But I should have stayed with you. I should have definitely stayed with you" Yuri sighed in regret, thinking that if she stayed with Aaron, all of this might not have happened. He'd have been there. He would have helped. He would have known what to do. "I'm so sorry" She apologized.

"It's okay" Aaron stated.

"No. No, it's not. I… I'm sorry for the way I treated you, Aaron. That was wrong of me. I should have been straight and forward with you. You should have known everything right then, right there. But… I was scared"

"Natsuki told me a little bit. Something about you getting attacked by her father. But… she went silent after that. Like something horrible happened. It looked like she witnessed a mur… Yuri… please tell me you didn't"

"I had no choice…" Yuri said as she started crying, guilt ridden tears beginning to form under her eyes, mainly do to the fact that she had to confess her sin not to herself, but to her love. Confess to him and be judged. "He had his hands on my neck, Aaron! He was going to…"

"Oh. That's uhh… that's different then. Never mind" Aaron dropped it quickly, the circumstances now known to him. "I can understand now. If I did the same, I wouldn't have told you"

"I didn't want to" Yuri admitted.

"I know you didn't"

"Do you still love me?" She asked.

"Yes" Aaron stated. "It's self defense, Yuri. You were protecting yourself. That's not a crime"

"I know it's not. But… it doesn't change what I've done. Or how I feel about it" Yuri said as she pulled out a box of tissues, using them to wipe the tears from her eyes. "Please. Let's talk about something else. Anything else. I can't… I can't take thinking about it anymore"

"Okay. Okay. We'll change topics. What do you wanna talk about?" Aaron asked.

"I can't sleep. I've tried. I just end up tossing and turning. I need your help, Love"

"My help? How?"

"Will you… will you read to me? Will you read me one of your poems? Please? Just until I fall asleep" She requested meekly, hearing Aaron chuckle slightly, no doubt thinking it to be cute.

"Alright. Let me just see what I can find off the-"

"No. I want to hear one of your poems" Yuri specified. "I want to hear your words. Your expressions. Your work. Someone else's isn't the same" She stated, Aaron sighing at that.

"Alright. Let me grab my notebook here and pick out a poem for you. Any one will do?" He asked as he grabbed his notebook, Yuri soon hearing the sound of ruffling sheets soon after, Aaron most likely now laying in his bed.

"Anything, as long as it's yours" Yuri stated, a small smile finally coming onto her face, eager to hear Aaron read to her.

"Okay then. Let's see here. Um… not that one. Nope. This one's not done yet. A few sentences need to be redone here. This one's all over the place. This one! Ooh, you'll like this one!" Aaron said enthusiastically, Yuri still smiling as she awaited it. "I um… I kinda thought about you when I wrote it. That's a bit cheesy, I know. But inspiration is inspiration. I tried to see if I can copy your style. Make it sound like something you would have wrote. I hope you like it. Okay… here we go"

---

The Lilac In The Heavy Winter Wind

A poem by Aaron

–

The winter's months have come and the snow falls hard as the wind blows rough. Cruel. Angry. Like the season itself is filled with an unbridled rage.

O' how the heavy winter wind blows. O' how the heavy winter wind snows.

O' how the heavy winter wind goes.

The plants, it kills. The tree's, it wilts. The fire, it snuffs. The water in the pipes, it freezes and the people in their homes, it forces them to stay.

O' how the heavy winter wind blows. O' how the heavy winter wind snows.

O' how the heavy winter wind goes.

O' winter wind, you are cold and cruel. O' winter wind, you play nature for a fool. You dominate the land in a tyranny not even the power hungry wish for. Be banished, wicked wind and bring spring once more.

Yet the wind runs its course, much to all our dismay.

The plants, it kills. The tree's, it wilts. The fire, it snuffs. The water in the pipes, it freezes and the people in their homes, it forces them to stay.

Yet there is one that survived. One that refuses to leave its home. Even when the odds are against it. When the creatures hibernate and the birds migrate. Search for a new place to roam.

A single plant still stood. A flower still in bloom. A simple lilac fought with the wind, even in the face of its doom.

The cold killed its friends, of this there was no doubt. Without the warm sun and the fresh water, they all withered. Fell, yet the lilac still stood stout.

O' how the heavy winter wind blows. O' how the heavy winter wind snows.

O' how the heavy winter wind goes.

The plants, it kills. The tree's, it wilts. The fire, it snuffs. The water in the pipes, it freezes and the people in their homes, it forces them to stay.

Yet the lilac, it could not wilt away. A storm it summoned in anger. A blizzard to kill the lilac frail, sharp winds left and right, up and down. A harrowing, deadly gale.

Yet the lilac stood strong and braved the cold. It faced the deadly winds head on and fought against them so bold.

As the winds blew up and down, side to side, not one petal off the lilac would fall, even as the blizzard raged on, not even slightly did the lilac wilt at all.

O' little lilac in the heavy winter wind, its petals soft to the touch. O' little lilac in the heavy winter wind, cease your struggle, for it is too much. It is too much to watch you suffer and fight. Give up your defiant stand against the winter wind. Do not face this blizzard anymore. Wilt away, so that you may bloom again in peace come spring's first day.

It became a spectacle to the people, the lilac's fight against the winter wind. The battle it had against the elements in its fight to survive. Some people took inspiration from it. From its ability to thrive.

It was a simple flower. Mindless and unfeeling. Yet it fought for its survival so fiercely, it's courage having no rival.

The people, for all their power and might, were brought to mercy by the wind. Trapped in their homes and forced to stay. Themselves and their children confined to their homes, locked away.

Yet this lilac, this flower so small, fought and faced the wind, suffering not from the cold at all.

"If a simple flower could live this free…" The people thought. "Why not we?"

And so they worked to join the battle against the heavy winter wind. To fight as the lilac did. Survive the winter's gale. Survive like that simple flower so frail.

The children would gather round the plant to watch it fight. To see it face the wind with all its might.

O' little lilac in the heavy winter wind, its petals soft to the touch. Keep fighting, O' little lilac. Strong little lilac. For to see you wither away now would be too much. O' brave lilac. Strong lilac. The flower that would not wilt away. Continue your fight. Continue your struggle so that you may bloom twice as much come spring's first day.

---

"You still awake?" Aaron asked after finishing his poem, only to smile slightly as he heard Yuri snore gently on the other side of the line, Aaron happy to know he succeeded in putting her to sleep. Kind of a shame that he did though. He was looking forward to hearing her thoughts on his work. Either way, he was just glad he had done as he was asked. "Good night, Yuri. I love you" He said before hanging up, putting his phone and notebook away before getting under his bed covers, falling asleep himself soon after.